Episodes
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Episode 347: Uniquely Us—Neurodivergence and Marriage with Dr. Stephanie Holmes
Send us Fan Mail What happens when one spouse is neurotypical and the other is neurodivergent, or when both spouses have different neurodivergent needs? Rebecca sits down with Dr. Stephanie Holmes, co-author of Uniquely Us, to explore the realities of neurodiverse marriage, including emotional...
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Episode 346: Carl Lentz Has a New Book on Overcoming Infidelity. Should He Have a Platform?
Send us Fan Mail Can a pastor bounce back from scandal and reclaim the spotlight? Sheila and Rebecca unpack Carl & Laura Lentz’s book Overcoming Infidelity, exploring the difference between forgiveness and accountability, the privilege of celebrity pastors, and what genuine healing after betrayal...
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Episode 345: Why is the Old Testament So Cavalier about Abuse of Women? feat. Dr. Helen Paynter
Send us Fan Mail What do we do with Bible passages that seem to portray God as indifferent to violence against women? Sheila sits down with Dr. Helen Paynter of the Centre for the Study of Bible and Violence to explore disturbing Old Testament stories, the historical context of biblical laws, and...
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Episode 344: Do Only Wives Have to Act Like Jesus in Marriage? (A Look at Kathy Keller)
Send us Fan Mail Is Philippians 2 a biblical argument for male headship, or is it a call for ALL Christians to give up status and power in the way Jesus did? In this episode we unpack Kathy Keller’s teaching in “The Meaning of Marriage,” examining the assumptions behind complementarianism, the...
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Episode 343: Called to Serve - Are We Burying Women's Talents in the Ground?
Send us Fan Mail What happens when women who simply want to serve Jesus keep running into barriers to ministry? First, Hannah Hunt joins us as we hear the remarkable stories behind Called to Serve. Then we talk with Dr. Adam Harbaugh about what it actually takes for churches to rethink theology,...
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Episode 342: Mica Miller’s Death and “The Sex Is For Men” Problem
Send us Fan Mail Mica Miller’s Death and “The Sex Is For Men” Problem The tragic Mica Miller documentary The Death of a Pastor’s Wife reveals a deeply evil pastor husband with entitled, misogynistic views about sex. But those views didn’t come out of nowhere. In this interview that Sheila did…
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Episode 341: What’s the Dignity Line? Feat. Dawn from The Minimal Mom
Send us Fan Mail In this episode, we sit down with Dawn from The Minimal Mom to talk about the “dignity line,” a simple framework for recognizing if our relationships are characterized by respect, accountability, trust, and safety - and why patterns matter more than labels. We also dig into the...
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Episode 340: Live, Laugh, Love with Kristin Du Mez
Send us Fan Mail What if many of the ideas we’ve been taught about “biblical womanhood” have a much stranger history than we realized? We sit down with historian & author Kristin Du Mez to unpack the fascinating—and sometimes surprising—story behind Christian womanhood, from Hannah Whittall Smith...
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Episode 339: Look Like a Lady--the 5 Visual Tropes of Womanhood that Keep Us Small
Send us Fan Mail What if some of the messages we've absorbed about “what it means to be a woman” have less to do with the Bible and more to do with centuries of art, culture, and storytelling? Today we have a fascinating conversation with art historian Elissa Yukiko Weichbrodt about five powerful...
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Episode 338: What if God is Like a Mother Too? (Love Like a Mother)
Send us Fan Mail What if the Bible has been giving us maternal pictures of God all along—and we've simply been overlooking them? Today we talk with Elizabeth Berget, author of “Love Like a Mother,” about God's compassion, childbirth, motherhood, grief, protection, exhaustion, and the surprising...
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Episode 337: Why Do Evangelicals Ask Women to Do Such Risky Things if They Say They Protect Women?
Send us Fan Mail What happens when “protecting women” actually leaves them with fewer choices, less financial security, and nowhere to go when a marriage becomes unsafe? Today we unpack the hidden risks behind certain conservative Christian teachings about gender, money, work, and submission…
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Episode 336: The Problems with The Empowered Wife by Laura Doyle
Send us Fan Mail Bethany Jantzi and Dr. Merry Lin join us in taking a very close—and occasionally incredulous—look at Laura Doyle’s The Empowered Wife, unpacking its promises, “six intimacy skills,” and insistence that women can transform their marriages by changing themselves. They explore where...
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Episode 335: If Men Are Leaders...Why Do They Need Women to Fix Them?
Send us Fan Mail What happens when “Christlike manhood” starts sounding suspiciously like Victorian gender roles, male entitlement, and a whole lot of covert nudging? This rage-read of Eric Ludy’s “Warrior Poet Manhood” article unpacks the deeper assumptions behind a theology that tells women to...
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Episode 334: What Should Accountability for Purity Culture Authors Look Like?
Send us Fan Mail Buckle up for the final episode of our 3-part series on purity culture! In this episode we dig into what genuine accountability actually looks like when influential Christian leaders (namely Dannah Gresh) recognize the harm their teachings have caused. Through a thoughtful...
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Episode 333: Good Fruit - Are We Measuring It Right When It Comes to Christian Marriage Teaching?
Send us Fan Mail What does Jesus actually mean when he tells us to judge a tree by its fruit - and what happens when we apply that idea to marriage and Christian teaching? Today Joanna, our resident statistician, joins us as we dig into the biblical meaning of “good fruit,” unpack the research...
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Episode 332: When Purity Culture Supporters Try to Rewrite History (Dannah Gresh Case Study)
Send us Fan Mail And….we’re BACK with a fresh new season of the Bare Marriage podcast! We’re kicking things off with a lively deep dive into the debate over purity culture, asking what happens when influential Christian voices revise their past teachings, redefine the terms, and rewrite the…
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Episode 331: Keith & Sheila Respond to Crazy Clips (Is it That Jezebel Spirit Again?)
Send us Fan Mail In this season finale we take a dive into social media, examining the messages behind viral clips from popular marriage and church influencers, and challenge fear-based teachings about marriage, parenting, gender, and authority. Through our thoughtful (and often hilarious)…
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Episode 330: Men of Virtue with Zachary Wagner
Send us Fan Mail What does it actually mean to be a “good man” in today’s world—and does Christianity offer something deeper than dominance, leadership clichés, or internet manosphere culture? In this thoughtful and surprisingly hopeful conversation, Zachary Wagner joins us to unpack masculinity...
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Episode 329: Parenting With Confidence Without Messing Up Your Kids with Wendy Snyder
Send us Fan Mail What happens when you know the old “because I said so” parenting style isn’t healthy…but you also don’t want to raise entitled little tyrants? In this episode, parenting coach Wendy Snyder joins us for a deeply practical, heartfelt, (and hilariously honest) conversation about...
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Episode 328: The Billy Graham Rule and What It Does to Men Too
Send us Fan Mail What if the “Billy Graham rule” (or the evangelical distortion of it) says more about fear than integrity? In this episode, Danielle Strickland helps us unpack the assumptions behind the idea that men and women can’t be alone together—and ask whether it protects integrity or...
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Episode 327: For Men Only by Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn Talks Lust and Sex
Send us Fan Mail Welcome to Part 2 of our breakdown of For Men Only! This episode dives headfirst into the sex chapter — and quickly exposes how shaky stats and selective storytelling create misleading narratives about libido and desire. We examine why women’s sexual desire is far more contextual…
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Episode 326: The Problems with For Men Only by Jeff & Shaunti Feldhahn
Send us Fan Mail In this episode, we dive into For Men Only, by Shaunti & Jeff Feldhahn, and let’s just say…we have many thoughts! We unpack some of its core claims about gender dynamics, communication, and emotional needs. Rebecca shares how this book impacted her first few months of marriage to...
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Episode 325: I Belong to Me with Tia Levings
Send us Fan Mail Tia Levings is back, and this time she's brought the book so many of you have been waiting for — I Belong to Me, a survivor's guide to recovery and hope after religious trauma, and the follow-up to her memoir A Well-Trained Wife. After thousands of women slid into her DMs asking...
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Episode 324: Who Bears the Emotional Labor and Mental Load for Sex?
Send us Fan Mail Who's carrying the mental and emotional load when it comes to sex? Today Keith and I are breaking down all the ways evangelical marriage culture places that burden almost entirely on women: from appearance standards and contraception to performing passion on demand and…
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Episode 323: A Step-By-Step Guide to Vetting a Church's Website to See if They're Heathy!
Send us Fan Mail Finding a healthy church after being hurt is hard — especially when toxic churches have learned to hide what they really believe. This week, Rebecca and I walk you through our evidence-based, step-by-step method for evaluating a church's website before you ever step through the...
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Episode 322: Why Is Every Man's Battle So Creepy? A Harrowing Example
Send us Fan Mail A close look at how Every Man’s Battle ignores the impact of predation on women and girls–and is just plain creepy! Plus a new study on hostile/benevolent sexism when it comes to tradwife content. It’s our podcast and Friday RoundUp in one! Our podcast we wanted to air this week...
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Episode 321: New Research into Modesty Messaging, Sexual Harassment in Church, Plus We Answer Your Questions!
Send us Fan Mail Keith and Rebecca are taking over the podcast this week and are answering your questions — from how to find a healthy church community to whether complementarianism is a dealbreaker. They're refreshingly honest and a little funny about it. Then Joanna joins to dig into a…
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Episode 320: Let’s Talk Adult ADHD and GENDER ROLES!
Send us Fan Mail What does it mean to have realistic expectations of a spouse with ADHD? How does gender play into how ADHD impacts a relationship? And what do accommodations actually look like—versus what do they not look like in a healthy marriage? This week Rebecca talks about her own…
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Episode 319: Did Purity Culture Cause Developmental Trauma--and Kill Libido?
Send us Fan Mail What if the reason so many women struggle with desire, arousal, and orgasm has nothing to do with their bodies—and everything to do with what they were taught before they even wanted to be sexual? In this episode, Rebecca and I pull together research and real-life stories to…
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Episode 318: You're Allowed to Want Stuff! Talking Desire with Jay Stringer
Send us Fan Mail Jay Stringer, licensed therapist and author of Unwanted, is back to talk about his brand new book Desire: The Longings Inside Us and the New Science of How We Love, Heal, and Grow. Together, we unpack why so many of us — especially those from church backgrounds — were taught to...
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Episode 317: Famished--How Purity Culture Taught Women to Shrink with Anna Rollins
Send us Fan Mail Anna Rollins grew up as the kind of girl who took her faith seriously — and that's exactly why it hurt her so much. In this conversation, Anna and I dig into her memoir Famished: On Food, Sex, and Growing Up as a Good Girl, where she traces how purity culture's messages about...
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Episode 316: What Still Surprised Us Making the Love & Respect Docuseries
Send us Fan Mail Rebecca, Joanna, and I are pulling back the curtain on what went into making the Love & Respect docuseries — including the things that didn't make the final cut. From the bizarre Nazi torture illustration Emerson used to keep women in bad marriages, to the genuinely heartbreaking...
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Bad Stats, Editing the Bible, and Recycling 1970s Ideas: A Love & Respect Deep Dive Part 2
Send us Fan Mail Part two of a three-part docuseries deep dive into the best-selling evangelical marriage book Love & Respect. LOVE & RESPECT DOCUSERIES: Watch the video version of this Here's episode 1. To see episode 3 next week, subscribe to the Good Fruit Faith Channel This podcast delves…
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Happily Never After: The Curious Case of Love and Respect (Deep Dive Part 1)
Send us Fan Mail Part one of a three-part docuseries deep dive into the best-selling evangelical marriage book, Love & Respect. THE LOVE & RESPECT DOCUSERIES: This is a video series, so if you want to watch it in all its glory, head over to https://youtu.be/z3EEAkjwcXA! To see episodes 2 & 3 when...
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Episode 313: To Heal or To Harm: Making Sense of Weaponized Bible Verses feat. Steven Tracy
Send us Fan Mail Today I'm talking with Dr. Steven Tracy, author of "To Heal or Harm," about how scripture has been twisted to keep abuse victims trapped. We're diving into passages that discuss things like, "wives submit," "God hates divorce," and "a gentle answer turns away wrath" to show what...
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Episode 312: Why The Complementarian Bar for Men is in the Basement
Send us Fan Mail We're tackling three really problematic things that have happened recently with evangelical leaders that show just how low the bar has gotten for men. From Jonathan Podluka announcing he wants to sleep with multiple beautiful women, to pastors responding to Philip Yancey's affair...
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Episode 311: The Misleading Tactics of Complementarianism feat. Lydia Kaiser
Send us Fan Mail Today I'm talking with Lydia Grace about her incredible new book, Bible Truth About Women. Lydia grew up in the ultra-conservative IBLP circles and went to seminary to answer her own questions about what the Bible really says about women's roles. What she discovered was shocking:...
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Episode 310: Desiring God Thinks Marriage Is Like Peddling Furiously on the Back of a Tandem Bike
Send us Fan Mail We're kicking off 2026 by teaching you how to think critically about Christian marriage and relationship advice! Rebecca and I walk through some really problematic articles and social media posts - from the Gospel Coalition's piece against therapy to Tilly Dillehay’s tandem bike...
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Episode 309: Evangelicals Shouldn't Be Embarrassing: The Oklahoma Student's Essay and How Our Faith Has Changed
Send us Fan Mail We're coming full circle from our podcast on right-wing authoritarianism to talk about that viral Oklahoma student essay and why Christians rallying around bad arguments makes all Christians look terrible. Then Keith and I get vulnerable about how our faith has changed over the...
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Episode 308: “We Respond to Crazy Pastor Clips” Pallooza!
Send us Fan Mail Keith and I went through 10 clips from evangelical influencers and pastors that have been driving people crazy all year. We break down why Josh Howerton's claims about conservative mental health don't hold up, why blaming women for divorce is absurd, and how complementarian...
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Episode 307: How the Stories of Missionary Kids Unmask the Myths of Evangelicalism (and Purity Culture!)
Send us Fan Mail It's episode 307 of the Bare Marriage podcast! Holly Fletcher joins us to talk about her AMAZING new book Missionary Kids. I devoured it in one sitting. We need to listen to the stories of these kids, because they're a microcosm of white evangelicalism! JOIN OUR FUNDRAISING...
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Episode 306: Thalidomide, Bad Marriage Books, and a Jesus Who Laughs
Send us Fan Mail Happy American Thanksgiving! We're rerunning one of my favorite episodes from four years ago where Rebecca and I talk about what God is actually like—spoiler: He laughs and takes joy in life, not just suffers on the cross. We also dive into why our Great Sex Rescue research…
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Episode 305: All the Problems with Complementarianism in a Nutshell--And How They Try to Make it Sound Pretty
Send us Fan Mail Complementarians use a lot of really nice-sounding words to describe their beliefs about gender roles, but when you actually break down what they mean, they're not talking about roles at all—they're talking about hierarchy. In this episode, Keith and I decode all the euphemisms...
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Episode 304: Francine Rivers' And the Shofar Blew Part 2: What Can We Learn from Christian Fiction?
Send us Fan Mail We're diving into part two of our discussion on Francine Rivers' "And the Shofar Blew.” While Christian fiction can be inspirational, this novel reinforces dangerous theology about marriage, telling abuse victims to stay and suffer "better," portraying women who report pastoral...
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Episode 303: Francine Rivers' And the Shofar Blew—Let’s Examine Christian Romance Fiction Part 1
Send us Fan Mail We're doing something we've never done before—looking at a Christian fiction book to explore how fiction shapes our theology of marriage. Today we're discussing Francine Rivers' "And the Shofar Blew.” We're talking about how fiction doesn't give explicit advice but still…
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Episode 302: For the Love of Women feat. Dorothy Greco
Send us Fan Mail Ever been told you're complaining too much about how women are treated because "things are so much better now"? Yeah, me too. In this episode, I sit down with journalist and author Dorothy Greco to talk about her new book For the Love of Women, and we dig into why sexism is...
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Episode 301: The 4 Categories of Euphemisms about Sex--that All Drive Us Batty!
Send us Fan Mail We're diving into the euphemisms used in Christian marriage books and by evangelical pastors, and when you translate them into actual language, it gets real creepy real fast. From Kevin Leman's "Mr. Happy" to Josh Butler's semen theology, these authors hide harmful messages…
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Celebrating Episode 300! With the Best of Becca's Bloopers and One Liners
Send us Fan Mail We're celebrating episode 300 with a "Best of Becca" compilation! Rebecca and I react to her most memorable moments from the past six years of podcasting—from rabid raccoons to pooping in the shower to Gerald not being able to slay dragons. We also reflect on how the evangelical...
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Episode 299: What Does the Bible Say about Divorce for Abuse? Feat. Helen Paynter
Send us Fan Mail Does God really tell women they need to submit to abuse and stay in marriages where they're being raped and harmed? Today's interview with Dr. Helen Painter is one you need to hear—whether you're stuck in an abusive marriage getting horrible advice from your pastor, or you know...
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Episode 298: Purity Culture, Date Rape, and Porn: plus Joash Thomas and the Justice of Jesus
Send us Fan Mail Two major studies today prove what we've been saying: purity culture makes people unable to recognize marital and date rape as actual rape, and male porn use hurts women regardless of their attitude toward it—though religious women suffer more because of the scripts we've been...
About this show
Tired of Christian pat answers about marriage? The podcast that goes in-depth into marriage, parenting, and even sex--to see how we can live the passionate life we were meant for. Paired with Bare Marriage--the blog!
Hosted by
Sheila Gregoire
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