Connectedness

In this episode of The Connectedness Podcast, we sit down with Rita, founder of Simple Self-Care, to explore the powerful connection between self-care, stress management, mental health, and healthy relationships.After facing overwhelming stress, burnout, and thoughts of hopelessness while navigating the challenges of motherhood, Rita discovered that true self-care isn't about indulgence—it's about self-preservation.Together, we discuss:✅ Why self-care is NOT selfish✅ The hidden signs of stress overload and burnout✅ How stress impacts marriages, friendships, parenting, and community✅ Why you can't pour from an empty cup✅ Simple daily habits to reduce overwhelm and improve well-being✅ Journaling, movement, mindfulness, and practical stress relief techniques✅ The role of connectedness and community in healing and resilience✅ How to know when it's time to ask for helpIf you've been feeling exhausted, overwhelmed, disconnected, or stuck in survival mode, this conversation offers practical tools and hope for finding your way back to yourself.🌐 Learn more about Rita and Simple Self-Care:https://simpleselfcare.net📱 Join Rita's FREE Self-Care Text Club:https://simpleselfcare.activehosted.com/f/29Every Tuesday you'll receive a simple self-care mission designed to help you reduce stress and take better care of yourself—one small step at a time.🎧 Enjoyed this episode?Like, subscribe, and share it with someone whose cup may need refilling.#SelfCare #BurnoutRecovery #MentalHealth #StressManagement #Relationships #PersonalGrowth #Mindfulness #Wellness #Connectedness #Podcast

Have you ever looked around at your life and thought:"Everything is fine... so why doesn't it feel right?"In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with life coach and founder of Uncompromised, Elinor Miller, for a powerful conversation about self-trust, people pleasing, boundaries, personal growth, and what happens when you've outgrown the life you've worked so hard to build.Elinor shares her own journey from feeling stuck in a life that looked successful on paper to helping women reconnect with themselves, stop abandoning their needs, and create lives that feel deeply aligned and authentic.In this conversation, we discuss:✓ Why high-achieving women often lose trust in themselves✓ The hidden danger of living a life that's "not bad"✓ How people pleasing disconnects us from who we really are✓ The difference between self-sacrifice and genuine kindness✓ Why wanting more doesn't make you ungrateful✓ Reparenting yourself and healing your inner child✓ How to stop seeking permission from others✓ Boundaries, relationships, and self-worth✓ Signs you've become disconnected from yourself✓ How to make major life decisions with confidence✓ The question that can change everything: Are you running toward something or away from something?One of the most powerful takeaways from this episode:"If you ever have to choose between disappointing yourself and disappointing someone else, your responsibility is to disappoint the other person."Whether you're navigating a career transition, relationship challenges, people-pleasing tendencies, or simply feeling called toward something more, this conversation offers practical wisdom and deep encouragement.Connect with Elinor Miller:Instagram: @elinormillerlifecoachWebsite: https://www.elinormillerco.com/Subscribe to Connectedness for conversations about personal growth, relationships, friendship, dating, emotional wellness, and living authentically.#SelfTrust #PersonalGrowth #PeoplePleasing #Boundaries #WomenEmpowerment #SelfWorth #Relationships #Confidence #Healing #LifeCoach #InnerChildHealing #ConnectednessPodcast #PersonalDevelopment #Mindset #AuthenticLiving

What if caring for a plant could help you care for yourself too?In this heartfelt episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with Veronica Leon, founder of Verde Tribe, plant coach, community builder, and creator of the wildly popular Plant Bingo events in Charlotte. Together, they explore the deeper emotional connection between plants, mindfulness, wellness, and personal growth.Veronica shares how growing up in Ecuador and watching her grandmother lovingly care for plants inspired her journey into entrepreneurship and plant wellness. From moving abroad to Spain to building Verde Tribe into a thriving community-centered business, this conversation is full of wisdom about slowing down, trusting yourself, and creating intentional routines that support mental health.You’ll also learn:🌿 Why plants can reduce stress and improve creativity🌿 How plant care reflects our emotional well-being🌿 Tips for beginner plant parents🌿 Common plant myths (including why you should NOT water orchids with ice cubes!)🌿 The story behind Charlotte’s favorite community event: Plant Bingo🌿 How Veronica uses plants to create mindfulness and connectionWhether you’re a plant lover, entrepreneur, or simply looking for ways to feel more grounded in everyday life, this episode will leave you inspired to nurture both your space and yourself.✨ Connect with Veronica / Verde Tribe:Instagram & TikTok: @verdetribeWebsite: https://verdetribe.com✨ Follow Connectedness:Hosted by Fernanda, founder of Filled CupsNew conversations about growth, connection, authenticity, and wellness every week.

What if the secret to better communication, stronger relationships, and more confidence isn’t perfection… but play?In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with Dayna Gowan: speaker, improviser, Distinguished Toastmaster, workshop facilitator, and host of the Improvly Speaking Podcast. They explore how improvisation can transform the way we communicate, connect, and show up in everyday life.Dayna shares how improv helped her overcome fear, embrace uncertainty, become a more confident speaker, and develop deeper human connections. Together, Fernanda and Dayna dive into the powerful improv principle of “Yes, And," how listening is a communication superpower, why adults lose touch with playfulness, and how creativity can improve relationships, parenting, leadership, and mental well-being.This conversation is filled with practical insights, vulnerable stories, laughter, and mindset shifts that can help anyone become a more authentic communicator and more connected human being.✨ In this episode, we discuss:-How improv builds confidence and reduces self-judgment- The “Yes, And” mindset for relationships and personal growth- Why active listening matters more than having the perfect response- How improv improves communication skills and social confidence- The connection between creativity, play, and emotional well-being- Why brainstorming often fails in corporate environments- Parenting, public speaking, and handling uncertainty through improv- Finding joy and humor in everyday life- How improv creates instant human connection🎧 About Dayna Gowan:Dayna is the founder of Improvly Speaking, where she helps individuals and organizations use improvisation skills to improve communication, leadership, creativity, and confidence. She also hosts the Improvly Speaking podcast and offers workshops, coaching, and corporate training.🔗 Connect with Dayna:Website: https://www.improvlyspeaking.comLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/daynagowanPodcast: Improv Speaking on Spotify & Apple Podcasts💛 If you enjoyed this episode, please like, subscribe, and share it with someone who could use a little more joy, confidence, and connection in their life.Learn about the power of Improv to change your life!

What happens when the life you built no longer feels aligned with who you are?In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with Paula Lesso, divorce coach, speaker, and advocate for women navigating major life transitions. Together, they explore the emotional reality of divorce, identity shifts, healing, self-trust, and how women can move from surviving to truly thriving.Paula shares her personal story of going from being a “comfortable” people-pleaser in marriage to rediscovering herself after divorce—and how that journey inspired her work helping women through every stage of the divorce process.Whether you’re questioning your relationship, currently going through a divorce, healing after one, or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers compassion, clarity, and hope.In this episode, we discuss:- The emotional stages of divorce- Rebuilding your identity after separation- Why so many women lose themselves in relationships- The role of mindset and movement in healing- Learning to trust yourself again- Navigating uncertainty and major life transitions- Creating a fulfilling life after divorce- Finding connection and support through difficult seasonsIf this episode resonates with you, please like, comment, and subscribe to Connectedness for more conversations about growth, authenticity, healing, and human connection.Show Notes & Resources🌿 Connect with Paula Lesso:https://paulalesso.com/🌿 Second Saturday Charlotte (mentioned in this episode):https://www.secondsaturdaycharlotte.com/🌿 Connect with Fernanda & Filled Cups:https://www.filledcups.com

Friendships don’t always end with conflict — sometimes, they simply fade. But what if they’re not actually over?In this episode of Connectedness, we explore the idea that many friendships aren’t lost… they’re just unmaintained. Building on the concept of “ambient distance,” we shift the focus from why relationships drift to how we can repair, revive, and sustain meaningful connections.We talk about the small, intentional actions that keep friendships alive, why reaching out can feel harder than it should, and how different people — especially across gender lines — approach maintaining relationships in different ways.If you’ve ever thought about someone you “used to talk to” and wondered if it’s too late… this episode is for you.✨ In this episode, we cover:Why friendships fade without conflictWhat “ambient distance” really meansHow to revive a friendship that feels distantSimple, practical ways to maintain connectionGender differences in emotional connection and friendship stylesLetting go of perfection when reconnecting💭 Reflection questions:Who in your life feels “paused” rather than finished?What’s one small way you can reconnect this week?If this resonated, consider sharing it with someone you’d love to reconnect with 🤍—🔔 Subscribe for more conversations on self-trust, emotional growth, and meaningful connection.#Friendship #Connection #PersonalGrowth #EmotionalWellbeing #Loneliness #Relationships #SelfGrowth #MentalHealth #Authenticity #SocialConnection

In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda sits down with health coach Sylvie Brockman to explore the powerful connection between gut health, perimenopause, and menopause. And how supporting your body during this transition can help you feel more energized, balanced, and fulfilled.If you’ve been struggling with bloating, brain fog, low energy, mood swings, or hormonal changes, this conversation will help you understand what’s really happening inside your body—and what you can do about it.Sylvie shares her personal journey of healing her gut and reclaiming her energy, along with practical, approachable tips to help you support your own health. Together, we explore how gut health impacts hormones, mood, digestion, and overall well-being, and why this stage of life can actually be an opportunity for deeper connection with yourself.In this episode, we cover:* What gut health really means (and why it matters more than you think)* The link between **gut health and menopause symptoms*** How hormones affect digestion during perimenopause* The gut-brain connection and its impact on mood and mental clarity* Simple daily habits to improve gut health naturally* How to feel more energized, confident, and connected in your body* What health coaching looks like and how Sylvie supports women 40+Whether you’re entering perimenopause, in the middle of menopause, or simply want to feel better in your body, this episode will leave you feeling informed, empowered, and supported.Connect with Sylvie Brockman:Website: https://www.sylviebrockman.comInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/holisticsylvie/Her next event on May 7 https://www.eventbrite.com/e/nourish-restore-a-wellness-event-for-women-tickets-1986920803610?📌 Don’t forget to:Like 👍Subscribe 🔔Share this episode with someone who might need it#GutHealth #Menopause #Perimenopause #HormoneHealth #WomensHealth #HolisticHealth #HealthyGut #WellnessPodcast #ConnectednessPodcast #SelfCare #HormoneBalance #PodcastForWomen

Are you pouring energy into friendships that leave you feeling drained, obligated, or quietly lonely — even when your life looks full from the outside? You're not alone. In this episode of the Connectedness Podcast, we're doing something most people have never done: mapping their entire social ecosystem with intention. Inspired by evolutionary psychologist Robin Dunbar's groundbreaking research on how humans actually organize their relationships, we explore the concept of friendship circles — and why understanding which ring your friends live in can completely change how you show up for them (and for yourself).In this episode we cover:✔ Robin Dunbar's circles of connection — and what they mean for your friendships today✔ Why the "best friend" label might be doing you more harm than good✔ The difference between a friendship that needs tending vs. one that has run its course✔ How to know if your energy is going to the right places✔ What reciprocity actually looks like in adult friendships✔ A simple exercise to map your own social ecosystemThis is not about cutting people off. It's about getting clear — so you can invest your heart in the right places and finally stop feeling guilty about the rest.Referenced in this episode:📖 Friends — Robin Dunbar📖 Friendships Don't Just Happen! — Shasta Nelson 📖 Platonic — Dr. Marisa Franco🌐 We Should Get Together — Kat Vellos (weshouldgettogether.com)——————————————————————————————🌸 ABOUT FILLED CUPS & THE CONNECTEDNESS PODCASTFilled Cups is a community and connections brand based in Charlotte, NC, dedicated to helping people build meaningful friendships, find their people, and show up authentically in their relationships.The Connectedness Podcast drops bi-weekly and explores what it really means to grow, connect, and trust yourself — in friendship, community, and beyond.Hosted by Fernanda Brasileiro — people development consultant, community builder, and founder of Filled Cups.——————————————————————————————📲 CONNECT WITH USInstagram: @filledcupsTikTok: @filledcupsWebsite: [your website]——————————————————————————————⏱ TIMESTAMPS0:00 – Introduction0:50 – What the friendship audit actually is (hint: not a purge)2:00 – Robin Dunbar's circles of connection explained4:30 – Why your circles shift over time — and why that's okay6:30 – Where is your energy actually going?9:00 – Needs tending vs. run its course11:30 – How to use this going forward13:30 – Closing reflection & questions to sit with——————————————————————————————#friendship #adultfriendships #loneliness #personalgrowth #friendshipadvice #connections #selfawareness #filledcups #connectednesspodc #robindunbar #meaningfulrelationships

In this episode of Connectedness, we explore social anxiety—what it really is, where it comes from, and how to begin overcoming it.Joined by psychotherapist Danielle Frouws https://daniellefrouws.com/, we break down the difference between shyness and social anxiety, why so many people struggle with fear of judgment, and what’s actually happening in your mind and body during anxious social moments. Danielle also shares both professional insight and personal experience with social anxiety, offering practical tools you can start using right away—from grounding techniques and mindset shifts to exposure-based strategies that help you build confidence over time. If you’ve ever overthought a conversation, avoided social situations, or felt like social anxiety is just “who you are,” this episode will help you understand that change is possible—and give you a path forward.What social anxiety actually is (and how it’s different from shyness)Why fear of judgment feels so intenseCommon thought patterns and physical symptomsHow avoidance makes anxiety worse over timePractical tools to manage anxiety in the momentHow to gradually build confidence through exposureWhy social anxiety doesn’t have to define youWhether your anxiety is mild or more intense, this conversation is designed to leave you feeling empowered, understood, and less alone.🎧 Listen now and take the first step toward feeling more confident and connected.#SocialAnxiety #MentalHealth #SelfGrowth #AnxietyHelp #Therapy #Confidence #ConnectednessPodcast

What does it really take to stay married — and stay connected — for 39 years?In this episode, I’m joined by Fabi Preslar, entrepreneur and author of Wilted and Worthy, to talk about the real foundations of long-term love: respect, honest communication, shared laughter, and continuous growth.Fabi and her husband not only built a 39-year marriage — they work together full-time and run a publishing company as a team. She shares insights on:Healthy conflict resolution in marriageWhy “fighting deep and fast” prevents resentmentWorking with your spouse successfullyGrowing individually without growing apartLetting go of relationships that no longer serve youFinding worthiness in life’s “wilting” seasonsFrom cancer recovery to grief to entrepreneurship, this episode is a powerful reminder that lasting love isn’t about perfection — it’s about evolution.If you care about connection, emotional maturity, and building a relationship that endures through every season, this conversation will stay with you.

Motherhood doesn’t always look like the highlight reel.In this episode, I’m joined by Crystal, founder of Rotten Lemons (not2rotten), a maternal mental health initiative creating safe, trauma-informed spaces for moms to share honestly — without shame.We talk about postpartum struggles, anxiety, rage, grief, and why maternal mental health is a critical health issue — not a personal shortcoming. Crystal shares how her mommy meetups and “Off the Record” roundtables give women a place to be seen, heard, and connected to real resources.If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, isolated, or quietly struggling in motherhood, you are not alone.This conversation is compassionate, honest, and deeply needed.

Why do friendships feel harder in adulthood — and what actually makes them grow?In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda explores the core lessons from Friendships Don’t Just Happen by Shasta Nelson. She breaks down the author’s powerful Friendship Triangle model — Consistency, Vulnerability, and Positivity — and explains how these three elements determine the depth of our relationships.You’ll learn:Why meaningful friendships require intentionThe different types of friends and why each mattersHow to move from acquaintance to close friendWhat might be missing in your current relationshipsSmall, practical ways to deepen connection this weekIf you’re craving deeper connection, navigating loneliness, or learning how to show up more authentically in your relationships, this episode is for you.Because friendship doesn’t just happen — it’s built.

Why is making friends as an adult so hard?In this episode of Connectedness, I’m joined by Zayne for an honest, thoughtful conversation about adult friendships, loneliness, and what it really takes to build meaningful connection later in life.We talk about why friendships often fade as responsibilities grow, the emotional barriers that keep people disconnected, and why so many adults quietly struggle with loneliness. Zayne shares personal insights on social anxiety, fear of rejection, and how past friendship experiences shape the way we show up today.Rather than offering quick fixes, this episode explores friendship as a skill—something we were never taught, but can learn with intention, self-awareness, and compassion. If you’ve ever felt awkward reaching out, unsure how to deepen friendships, or wondered if something is “wrong” with you for feeling lonely, this conversation is for you.In this episode, we discuss:Why adult friendships feel harder than they used toLoneliness, shame, and the unspoken struggle to admit disconnectionEmotional blocks like fear, awkwardness, and past friendship woundsWhat healthy, realistic adult friendships actually look likeSmall mindset shifts that make connection feel more possibleThis episode is for anyone craving deeper connection—and reassurance that you’re not alone in feeling this way.🎧 Listen, reflect, and share with someone who might need it.

Why is making friends as an adult so hard?In this episode of Connectedness, I’m joined by Zayne for an honest, thoughtful conversation about adult friendships, loneliness, and what it really takes to build meaningful connection later in life.We talk about why friendships often fade as responsibilities grow, the emotional barriers that keep people disconnected, and why so many adults quietly struggle with loneliness. Zayne shares personal insights on social anxiety, fear of rejection, and how past friendship experiences shape the way we show up today.Rather than offering quick fixes, this episode explores friendship as a skill—something we were never taught, but can learn with intention, self-awareness, and compassion. If you’ve ever felt awkward reaching out, unsure how to deepen friendships, or wondered if something is “wrong” with you for feeling lonely, this conversation is for you.In this episode, we discuss:Why adult friendships feel harder than they used toLoneliness, shame, and the unspoken struggle to admit disconnectionEmotional blocks like fear, awkwardness, and past friendship woundsWhat healthy, realistic adult friendships actually look likeSmall mindset shifts that make connection feel more possibleThis episode is for anyone craving deeper connection—and reassurance that you’re not alone in feeling this way.🎧 Listen, reflect, and share with someone who might need it.

What actually makes online dating work? In this episode, we sit down with Tony and Jenny, a real-life couple who met through online dating 13 years ago and are still going strong. Together, we break down what went right in their dating experience—and what modern daters can learn from it today.We dive into the importance of being specific and intentional in your dating profile to attract the right matches, not just more matches. Tony and Jenny share honest insights about dating when one partner has kids, navigating co-parenting dynamics, and building trust while blending lives. We also explore how they discovered their shared values, communicated expectations early on, and recognized healthy attachment styles in each other.Whether you’re online dating for the first time, dating after divorce, or trying to build a more secure and aligned relationship, this episode offers practical dating advice, real relationship lessons, and a refreshing success story from the world of online dating.🎧 Topics covered in this episode:Online dating success storiesHow to write a dating profile that attracts the right personEarly dating phase while co-parenting with an ExIdentifying shared values in relationshipsAttachment styles and emotional compatibilityBuilding healthy, long-term relationshipsIf you’re looking for honest conversations about love, dating, and relationships—this one’s for you.

Can you stay fit and healthy without going hardcore? In this episode, I’m joined by personal trainer and dancer Dev (Devone Smith) to talk about how busy professionals can build a realistic and sustainable fitness routine — without burning out.We dive into:Why extreme diets and workout plans usually failHow to approach weight loss and exercise sustainablyDev’s top fitness and nutrition tips for busy peopleThe role of consistency, walking, and protein (not perfection)How to make health a part of your lifestyle — not your whole lifeWhether you're juggling a 9–5, a creative hustle, or just trying to find balance, this episode is for anyone who wants a healthy lifestyle that actually sticks.Topics Covered:sustainable fitness, weight loss tips, intermittent fasting, walking for fat loss, strength training, healthy eating, busy professionals, fat loss without burnout, calorie deficit, long-term healthGrab Dev’s free guide: “10 Steps for Getting in Shape as a Busy Professional” Dev's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dkslifestylefitness/Dev's website: https://dkslifestylefitness.com/

Why is dating in the digital age so frustrating? In this episode, I share key takeaways from a live singles dinner discussion I moderated, where people of all ages opened up about the struggles of modern dating. We covered everything—from how dating apps have changed the game (and not always for the better), to why ghosting has become the norm, to the growing sense that people have become “disposable” in relationships.You’ll hear insights from multiple generations on:💔 How online dating has impacted connection👻 Why ghosting happens—and how people really feel about it🧠 What singles actually want in a partner today🚫 Rejection: how to deal with it in a healthier way🔁 The contrast between dating before vs. after the internetWhether you're swiping, soul-searching, or just sick of the scene, this episode offers real talk on what’s going wrong—and what we might need to fix.🔔 Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review if this resonated with you!#datingpodcast #modernlove #ghosting #relationships #onlinedating #datingapps #millennials #genz #singlesdiscussion

In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda explores one of the most unspoken truths about adult friendships: sometimes, we outgrow people — or realize they’re simply not for us.How do we handle those quiet realizations with honesty and compassion? How do we evaluate friendships through the lens of our values instead of guilt or obligation? And what does it look like to walk away — without drama, but with deep self-trust?Join Fernanda as she guides you through the emotional landscape of letting go, from tuning into your inner wisdom to honoring the grief that can come with releasing a connection that no longer fits.✨ In this episode:Why it’s okay to be discerning in friendshipsHow to assess your relationships using values, energy, and emotional safetyWhat to do when a friendship starts feeling one-sided, chaotic, or drainingHow to lovingly distance yourself from people who no longer alignThe emotional impact of friendship breakups — even quiet onesThis episode is for anyone who’s learning to protect their peace, make space for aligned relationships, and trust themselves in the process.💬 Connect with Fernanda on Instagram @filled.cups to share your reflections or join the conversation.

In this episode of Connectedness, Fernanda dives into the powerful insights from David Richo’s transformational book, How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving.We explore how childhood wounds shape our adult relationships — and how we can begin to heal them through self-awareness, presence, and compassion.Fernanda unpacks Richo’s “Five A’s” — Attention, Acceptance, Appreciation, Affection, and Allowing — and reflects on what it means to love mindfully, show up authentically, and take responsibility for our emotional patterns.Whether you're in a relationship, healing from one, or deepening your connection with yourself, this episode offers meaningful tools to support your emotional growth.✨ Topics covered:Who is David Richo and why his work mattersThe connection between unmet childhood needs and adult relationshipsWhat it really means to be an “adult” in loveHow to practice the 5 A’s of mindful loving in everyday life🔗 Mentioned in this episode:How to Be an Adult in Relationships by David Richo[Insert affiliate link or bookshop link if applicable]💬 Let’s stay connected:Follow Fernanda on Instagram and tiktok @filled.cups for more reflections on connection, healing, and self-trust.

Ever been so nervous in a meeting that you couldn't even remember your own name? That was Angela. She'd show up to status meetings, say "no updates," and pray no one would notice her.But here's what makes Angela's story so powerful: she didn't stay stuck there.In this episode, Angela takes us through her transformation—from the person who was too scared to ask questions in meetings, to someone who confidently walked away from corporate stability to build her own consulting business. And trust me, the journey wasn't pretty. She talks about wanting "the floor to swallow her whole" during her first Toastmasters sessions, and how it took four months before speaking up felt less threatening.What I love most about this conversation is how real Angela gets about the messy middle. She shares the exact moment a coworker gave her brutally honest feedback that changed everything. She talks about the director who noticed her transformation without her saying a word. And she opens up about why moving to the UK for love meant putting her entire career on the line—and how she became a remote work pioneer before it was even a thing.But this isn't just a feel-good story about following your dreams. Angela gets honest about what she struggled with when she went out on her own: networking felt unnatural, she spent too much time on accounting instead of hiring help, and she learned the hard way that there's a difference between your "zone of genius" and your "quicksand."The wisdom that hit me hardest? When Angela talks about getting feedback that she needed to "create her own opportunities" in corporate. At first, she raged against it. But then she realized: staying put and waiting for someone else to create experiences for her—that was the real risk.This episode is for you if:You've ever felt invisible or unheard at workYou're tired of waiting for permission to take the next stepYou're curious about Toastmasters but terrified to try itYou're thinking about leaving corporate but scared of the uncertaintyYou want to hear a real, unfiltered story about betting on yourselfWhat we talk about:How silence can actually create bigger problems than speaking upWhy Toastmasters changed everything (even though she almost quit)The surprising perks of being a remote work guinea pigWhat happens when you finally stop filtering everythingThe truth about starting a consulting business (spoiler: hire help sooner)Why "shoring up your weak spots" isn't always the answerHow volunteer leadership prepared her for paid leadershipThe moment she realized the risk was staying, not leavingKey takeaway: Confidence isn't something you're born with. It's something you build by showing up—especially when it feels uncomfortable. You don't have to transform overnight. You can take a break, come back, and eat the elephant one bite at a time.If this episode resonates with you, share it with someone who needs that nudge to bet on themselves. And as always, thank you for being here and choosing connection.Resources mentioned:Toastmasters InternationalJordan Harbinger's 6 Minute Networking"The Big Leap" by Gay Hendricks (Zone of Genius concept)About Connectedness:This is the space where we explore what it means to grow, connect, trust ourselves, and show up authentically with each other. Hosted by Fernanda, founder of Filled Cups. New episodes weekly about dating, relationships, friendships, and personal growth.Filled Cups Website📸 Instagram: @filled.cups

In this episode of the Connectedness Podcast, I sit down with life and success coach Lu Tandazo to talk about one of the most powerful inner shifts we can make: rebuilding confidence from the inside out.Lu opens up about leaving an abusive marriage, losing her sense of self, and slowly rebuilding her life through personal development, a surprising love for tennis, and a big career pivot from teaching into the corporate world. She also shares how getting “stuck” later in a successful HR career and facing a second marital crisis eventually led her to her true calling as a coach.We talk about:- Why job loss, divorce, or burnout can shake our identity and self-worth.- How to separate your worth from your job title, relationship status, or external validation.- Practical tools to rebuild confidence after life knocks you down.- The limiting beliefs we unintentionally pass on to our kids, including children with special needs.- What we can learn from the fearlessness and resilience of children.- How to interrupt negative self-talk and use affirmations in a way your body actually believes.If you’ve ever told yourself “I’m not good enough,” tied your worth to performance, or struggled with guilt over past mistakes, this conversation will feel like a deep exhale.You can find out more about Lu on her website: https://www.dreamintosuccessnow.com/Thanks for watching!🎙️ 𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 episode, 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐭.🎙️ 𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞! Website: https://www.filledcups.com/ To find out more about Lu check out: https://www.dreamintosuccessnow.com/

In today’s podcast episode I’m talking about the power of community, chosen family, and what it really takes to feel like you belong. I sit down with my friend Geraldine, a Kenyan-born social worker and natural community builder, to explore how small, intentional moments can turn strangers into friends—and friends into family. Geraldine shares stories from growing up in Kenya in a home that was always full of guests, refugees, artists, and extended relatives. Community wasn’t a project, it was simply a way of life. Now that she lives abroad, she brings that same energy into her friendships, our salsa community, and the beautiful sisterhood she’s created around her. We talk about how she hosts gatherings without over-curating, how she trusts her intuition with new people, and how she uses play, dancing, and vulnerability to help others feel safe, seen, and included.If you’ve ever craved deeper friendships, a stronger sense of belonging, or your own version of “chosen family,” this conversation is for you. Geraldine offers gentle, practical ideas you can start using today—like asking more meaningful questions, reaching out with intention, and taking small, courageous steps toward real connection, even if you feel shy or nervous.If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend, send a message to someone you’ve been thinking about, or borrow one of Geraldine’s questions to spark a deeper conversation. That’s where true connection begins.Thanks for watching!🎙️ 𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 episode, 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐭.🎙️ 𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞Website: https://www.filledcups.com/

Relationships aren’t black and white—and neither is love. In this episode, I explore key insights from KC Davis’s Who Deserves Your Love, a book that redefines what healthy connection looks like. We’ll talk about how to set boundaries without guilt, why “love can be unconditional but relationships shouldn’t be,” and how to heal through connection instead of isolation. Link to the book: https://www.amazon.com/Who-Deserves-Your-Love-Relationship/dp/1668056488 link to her video explaining different types of hurtful behavior: https://www.tiktok.com/@domesticblisters/video/7504330342736727327

In today’s episode of the Connectedness Podcast, I’m having a real, honest conversation about dating after divorce in today’s online world. I sit down with my friend Chris, who shares what it’s actually like to re-enter the dating scene after 26 years of marriage and a divorce. We talk about dating apps, emotional healing, attachment styles, and some of the ways men and women often misunderstand each other.Chris opens up about navigating rejection, why no one is ever “fully healed” before dating again, and what it really means to “do the work” on yourself. He talks about his own journey with therapy, energy work, and a men’s group (F3), and how those tools helped him become more secure, emotionally aware, and intentional in relationships. Together, we explore what it looks like to date with more self-respect, clearer boundaries, and softer hearts—without slipping into victimhood or blaming all men or all women.If you’re divorced, newly single, or even just thinking about dating again, this conversation offers grounded, practical insight from both a woman’s and a man’s perspective. This isn’t about playing games or following rules. It’s about becoming the kind of person who can build a healthy, loving, long-term relationship.Thanks for listening!🎙️ 𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 episode, 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐭.🎙️ 𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞 Website: https://www.filledcups.com/

In this episode of the Connectedness Podcast, I sit down with my dear friend and life coach Lisa Chadderdon to talk about something so many of us struggle with: trusting ourselves and gently questioning the beliefs that no longer serve us. Lisa shares her powerful story of pivoting from a long legal career into life coaching, walking through divorce, and rebuilding her life with more purpose, clarity, and self-trust.We get honest about the difference between therapy and coaching, why mindset and nervous system regulation both matter, and how our inner narratives shape the way we show up in the world. We talk about impostor syndrome, people pleasing, fear of change, feeling stuck even when you’ve “checked all the boxes,” and how coaching can help you see your own patterns with more compassion instead of judgment.You’ll also hear a very real, live coaching moment where I open up about my own emotional eating and body image journey. Lisa helps me reframe the idea of acceptance—not as “giving up,” but as a way to stop beating myself up so I can actually make intentional, loving choices. If you’re navigating a big life change—like divorce, a career shift, or simply realizing the life you built doesn’t quite feel like you anymore—I think this conversation will feel like a soft place to land and a gentle nudge forward. And if you know someone who’s going through a transition and doubting themselves, please share this episode with them.You can find Lisa's information here: https://www.ljclifecoach.com/Thanks for watching!🎙️ 𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 episode, 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐭.🎙️ 𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞!Website: https://www.filledcups.com/You can find Lisa's information here: https://www.ljclifecoach.com/

In today’s episode of the Connectedness podcast, I’m sitting down with my dear friend and therapist Danielle Frouws to talk about friendship, intentionality, and putting yourself out there—especially when you’ve moved to a new city or feel like you’re starting over. We share the story of how we met at salsa and a Spanish meetup, how one brave ask (“I’m new here and I’m trying to make local girlfriends”) turned into a real friendship, and why vulnerability is a non-negotiable if you want deeper connections.Danielle and I get honest about what it actually looks like to make adult friendships: using tools like Meetup, seeing loneliness as a signal (not a flaw), and showing up consistently even when it feels awkward. We talk about the difference between group events and one-on-one time, why so many people feel stuck in surface-level interactions, and how to move from “we met once” to “you’re part of my chosen family.” We also talk about maintaining long-distance friendships through intentional “friend dates,” and why friendships deserve as much priority as work, romance, and family.If you’ve ever felt like you’re the only one struggling to make friends, this conversation is for you. I hope it encourages you to send that text, say “hey, want to grab coffee?” and keep showing up for the people who feel like home.You can connect with Danielle at https://daniellefrouws.com/ Thanks for watching!🎙️ 𝐈𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 episode, 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐭.🎙️ 𝐃𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛e!Website: https://www.filledcups.com/Danielle's website: https://daniellefrouws.com/

In today’s solo episode, I’m diving into one of the most underrated relationship skills out there: communication. Whether it’s with a partner, a friend, or someone you’re just getting to know, the way we talk — and how we talk — can make the difference between connection and confusion.I’m not showing up as an expert today. I’m showing up as someone who is actively trying to improve in this area, who has made mistakes, learned from them, and is still learning.This episode is about slowing down, tuning in, and understanding the human being in front of you… beyond the words they say.We’ll explore why communication breaks down, how unspoken boundaries turn into resentment, and how reading intentions instead of reacting only to words can shift an entire conversation. I share examples of common relationship conflicts — everything from “you never help around the house” to “you keep cancelling plans” — and what might really be happening underneath the surface.We’ll also talk about:✨ Why tone matters more than we realize✨ Why naming your needs isn’t selfish — it’s responsible✨ Simple phrases that make hard conversations easier✨ How to express boundaries without guilt✨ How to stay curious instead of defensive✨ What research from places like The Gottman Institute can teach us about conflictIf you’ve ever struggled to speak up, avoided conflict to “keep the peace,” or felt misunderstood even when you said all the right words, this episode will give you something to reflect on — and hopefully something to try.If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone you care about. Sometimes one honest conversation can change the direction of a relationship.Thanks for watching!🎙️ If you like this episode, please like it and share it.🎙️ Don’t forget to subscribe!Website: https://www.filledcups.com/

In this episode I'm sharing some real life challenges involved in hosting singles events. I'm hoping listeners can help me with feedback to help me navigate these challenges better and not let the stress and anxiety get to me.

After almost nine years of feeling unfulfilled in corporate America, a sudden layoff gave me the push I didn’t know I needed. In this personal update, I take you behind the scenes of the messy, beautiful process of journaling, reflection, mentorship, and clarity — and how it all led me to a brand new chapter in my work and life.

In this episode I answer listener questions about making friends, alternatives to online dating, early relationships and nervousness about attending events.

In this episode I'm sharing "behind the scenes" stories about our friends and singles events so far. How cool it is to see people taking the chance and putting themselves out there!

Do you find yourself playing games in dating, or do you get frustrated when others are playing games? What if there was a better way?

If you're among the majority of adults who struggle to make friends, this episode is for you.

Introducing the Connectedness podcast! In this episode I give a brief intro about what to expect in future episodes, what I want to talk about, and how we might be developing the podcast in the future. I'm excited to be on this journey and I can't wait to share more with you!