PODCAST · comedy
Espresso
by Benedict Polizzi
Stand Up Comedian Benedict Polizzi gives listeners horrendous advice
Episodes
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THINGS YOU MISSED OUT ON | Espresso Pod 441
Anyone else remember 50 Cent climbing 3 stories of rusty scaffolding on MTV Spring Break with a G-Unit chain on or did i make that up in my head?? We talk about the REAL reasons you ended ur situationship 😭 was it bc she spelled the word Texas wrong? Maybe. To make it make even less sense we…
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KFC Mashed Potatoes (what do you want rubbed on your back?) | Espresso Pod 439
Pouring a venty cup of pumpkin cold foam on your back while a Mitsubishi Eclipse runs over your shoulder blades is actually exactly what I need right now. wHaT dO yOu wAnT mE tO dO tO yOu Put Texas Roadhouse cinnamon butter on my traps and hit me in the back with a tube sock full of marbles. Stop...
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Starter Jacket... Instant BFF's | How'd You Meet Your Best Friend? | Espresso Pod 437
How did you actually meet your best friend? If they weren't wearing a starter jacket or you didn't absolutely hate them you're not actual friends babe 👯 ------------------------------------------------- Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW...
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The Teacher With A Pet Flea In A Locket (Weird Substitute Teachers)
You haven't truly had an eating disorder until you eat ten bunless Big Macs with a knife and fork 😙 Today we remember why high school kids are the most ruthless people on earth and why putting Pepto-Bismol in your math teacher's coffee is rat tail kid activity. Don't act like you wouldn't sign…
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College QB I kissed at A Party Freshman Year ily? (Missed Connections)
Today we go through the ones who got away 💔 it can be the blonde girl who wanted you on your business trip or literally when the timberwolves passed on steph curry 😭 is it the time you missed the Schwan's Ice cream truck outside? Or when the college QB kissed you at a party freshman year and...
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5 grilled cheeses every day from Menards (What'd u get caught stealing?)| Espresso Pod 431
If u don't shave your best friend's leg with your bare foot while sleeping next to them are you even friends? What if I told you I stole 72 egg whites out of a Whole Foods soup container and got cornered by self-checkout security lady? We break down how to run an illicit grocery twist-tie bead…
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Green Ketchup Meatloaf (Best Meal Your Mom Made You)
The Fam put on a CLINIC with voice msgs this week 🫡 I'm still trying to decide if eating green ketchup meatloaf makes you a complete lunatic or a straight up visionary. BTW THIS IS A PRO PEAS PODCAST🫛 IF YOU DON'T LIKE PEAS GTFO. Quick question you tryna dig holes in an empty lot sometime? Luh...
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Swae Lee's Baby Pigs (Wildest thing You've Seen at Someones House?)
Brb gotta hotbox a house from the underground railroad taaahaaa 😮💨 On this ep we learn Swae Lee has baby pigs and eating macaroni off of Tupperware lids at your weird friend's house builds character. Btw if you don't fake wash your hands in the bathroom and pretend to like ur divorced dad's...
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Tyrese Haliburton's Achilles (Heartbreak)
No we don’t get emotional when the Chainsmokers plays in our AirPods at the gym?? This weeks Q Q Q Question of the week: What’s ur REAL heartbreak? When u called off ur wedding? or when Tyrese Haliburton tore his Achilles? ehem💔 tahaaaaa ------------------------------------------------- Send…
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Faking A Miscarriage (Things u never told ur ex)
You ever eat 3 dry Taco Bell cantina bowls on the side of the road with your hazard lights on? U ever lock eyes with ur gf's fully naked 73 year old dad on all fours? Me neither 👀 We try to figure out why German chocolate cake looks like baby throw up and how using Grand Theft Auto cheat codes…
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Olive Garden Bread Bowls (Inventions) Espresso Pod 421
Killing thousands of mad guests on Rollercoaster Tycoon and installing a functioning toilet directly into your car passenger seat? Sounds like a spress pod to me babe. We’re ending our lives over Olive Garden refusing to make garlic bread bowls and why can’t we pull up to an AMC theater to watch...
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Seth Rogen is a bad actor (Done Pretending) | Espresso Pod 419
Air hockeying nuts into a kid's mouth at the lunch table and screaming at your coworker's dog is just what happens when you finally stop pretending. We realize putting Pop-Tarts in the freezer is a crime against humanity and throwing down a five dollar bill for Little Caesars pizza is the…
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answering the phone as a sex shop employee (What's Your Bit?)
Taking football snaps underneath the lowest object possible and telling customer service reps u love them is how you commit to the bit. Stop acting like you don't spam Monster Mash seventeen times on tuchtunes at the bar while secretly pretending to be a sex shop employee on phone calls with your...
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Locked In On Caitlin Clark (Hear Me Out)
Eating ground turkey birthday dog food and sucking the ink out of a gold gel pen is exactly what happens when you get completely faded on a Tuesday. We are losing our minds over why having a baby with Caitlin Clark is strictly a business decision and how sleeping in a water bed is the ultimate...
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thing ur ex did that u liked?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "𝗕𝗔𝗟𝗗"𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱𝟬% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗖𝗛 https://benedictmerch.com/
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what's ur last meal?
Planning out your last meal on Earth gets completely cooked when you realize crumbling a Kraft single over a sloppy joe is the ultimate flex. We are crashing out over girls complaining about tomato texture while drinking boba tea and why taking a girl in heels to Benihana is a massive fumble.…
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what had the biggest come up?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "𝗕𝗔𝗟𝗗"𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱𝟬% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗖𝗛 https://benedictmerch.com/
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what are u asking at the gates of heaven?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "𝗕𝗔𝗟𝗗"𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱𝟬% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗖𝗛 https://benedictmerch.com/
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what's the show you miss?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "𝗕𝗔𝗟𝗗"𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱𝟬% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗖𝗛 https://benedictmerch.com/
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wtf were u even doing in 2016
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "𝗕𝗔𝗟𝗗"𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱𝟬% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗖𝗛 https://benedictmerch.com/
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ask me sum
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "𝗕𝗔𝗟𝗗"𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱𝟬% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗖𝗛 https://benedictmerch.com/
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what do you REALLY want for xmas?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://bennypolizzi.com/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "BALD" 𝗙𝗢𝗥…
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something u used to own that u want back
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://bennypolizzi.com/ Phoenix, AZ - Dec 12-13 Chicago, IL - Dec 22 (THESE GUYS! Live pod!)...
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your hardest hometown flex
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Sacramento, CA - Dec 4 Phoenix, AZ - Dec 12-13 💕 WATCH…
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what's your craziest 💩 story?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Sacramento, CA - Dec 4 Phoenix, AZ - Dec 12-13 💕 WATCH…
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what you bringin back from the dead?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Sacramento, CA - Dec 4 Phoenix, AZ - Dec 13-14 💕 WATCH…
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what don’t u give a sh*t about?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Sacramento, CA - Dec 4 Phoenix, AZ - Dec 13-14 💕 WATCH…
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what's your REAL favorite smell?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Sacramento, CA - Dec 4 Phoenix, AZ - Dec 13-14 💕 WATCH…
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what are you tired of?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 Sacramento, CA - Dec 4 Phoenix, AZ…
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something you regret not buying?
Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 Sacramento, CA - Dec 4 Phoenix, AZ…
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something that's slept on?
Support the pod! & so much more for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 💕 WATCH BENNY on LOVERS and LIARS ON CW APP 🧢 "𝗙𝗕𝗢𝗬" 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝟮𝟱% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟...
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wildest thing you’ve seen at a wedding?
Support the pod! & so much more for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 💕 WATCH BENNY on LOVERS and LIARS ON CW APP 🧢 "𝗙𝗕𝗢𝗬" 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝟮𝟱% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟...
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most horrific thing you've done in public
on this ep benny reacts to the most horrific thing you've done in public (like jumping off a cliff and losing your bathing suit) 🎟️ BENNY'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 Oct 3 Hollywood, CA...
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things you believed for too long
Support the pod! & so much more for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 💕 WATCH BENNY on LOVERS and LIARS ON CW APP 🧢 "𝗙𝗕𝗢𝗬" 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝟮𝟱% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟...
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weird thing you did as a kid?
Support the pod! & so much more for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 💕 WATCH BENNY on LOVERS and LIARS ON CW APP 🧢 "𝗙𝗕𝗢𝗬" 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝟮𝟱% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟...
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LEGAL thing you're addicted to? | Espresso Podcast Ep. 373
Support the pod! & so much more for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 💕 WATCH BENNY on LOVERS and LIARS ON CW APP 🧢 "𝗙𝗕𝗢𝗬" 𝗙𝗢𝗥 𝟮𝟱% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟...
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DUMBEST THING YOUR DAD HAS DONE
Support the pod! & so much more for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 🎟️ 𝗕𝗘𝗡𝗡𝗬'𝗦 𝗨𝗣𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗦𝗧𝗔𝗡𝗗 𝗨𝗣 𝗦𝗛𝗢𝗪𝗦 https://benedictpolizzi.com/shows/ Nashville, TN - June 13-14 Baltimore, MD - Sept 25 💕 WATCH BENNY on LOVERS and LIARS ON CW APP 🧢 "𝗙𝗕𝗢𝗬"…
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propaganda ur not falling for
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to the propaganda you are NOT falling for (like diet coke???) 🎟️...
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what's your conspiracy theory?
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this ep benny reacts to the conspiracy theories you believe in (like egss are not real) 🎟️...
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your wildest intrusive thought?
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to your wildest intrusive thoughts (like smelling a random baby) 🎟️...
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the brokest thing you've ever done
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this ep benny reacts to the brokest things you've done (like trying to sell your farts…
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discontinued food you wanna bring back?
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this ep benny reacts to the discontinued food or drink you guys wanna bring back (like laffy...
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the time you fumbled the bag
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to the times you fumbled the bag (like winning one of those cars in…
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what's the game you made up?
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this ep benny reacts on the games you made up & played (like playing hide n seek with xbow...
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tell me your missed connection💔
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to your missed connections💔 (like hookup was so good bro blocked you...
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moment you realized you were poor
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to the things that made you realize that you were poor? (like having…
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what's the biggest SCAM?
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to the things you guys think are the BIGGEST SCAM (like how priority...
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CRASH OUT about something
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to the things you scream to yourself while your driving (like fat ppl...
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merry christmas to everyone except __?
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to why you don't wish merry christmas to someone (like barbers who…
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thing your ex told you you'd never forget
⭐️Leave a Rating + Review 🔓support benny and get every other pod + weekly livestream for $5/month https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi 📺 watch on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@espressowbenedict on this pod benny reacts to the things that your ex said that you'll never forget (like telling...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Stand Up Comedian Benedict Polizzi gives listeners horrendous advice
HOSTED BY
Benedict Polizzi
CATEGORIES
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Espresso have?
Espresso currently has 263 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Espresso about?
Stand Up Comedian Benedict Polizzi gives listeners horrendous advice
How often does Espresso release new episodes?
Espresso publishes regularly with 263 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to Espresso?
You can listen to Espresso on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Espresso?
Espresso is created and hosted by Benedict Polizzi.
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