PODCAST · education
How To! with Mike Pesca
by Peach Fish Projects
You've got questions. We find answers.We all need advice, but it's not always clear who to ask. Each week, Mike Pesca invites a listener on the show to tackle a real problem, like protecting our elderly loved ones from scammers, emigrating as a throuple, and speaking without saying "um" - all with help from world-class experts: attorneys, doctors, entrepreneurs, authors, researchers - who actually know what they're talking about. Think of it as eavesdropping on someone else's therapy session, without the co-pay or awkward silence.
Episodes
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How to Nudge Your Kid Into Adulthood
Owen is about to graduate from high school and has no idea what he wants to do next. Owen doesn’t seem worried, but his mom, Lisa, is freaking out. In this episode of How To!, we get help from Julie Lythcott-Haims, former Stanford dean and author of How to Raise an Adult. Julie regrets dragging…
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How to Fire Your Daughter
Kyle wants to sell his 50-year old family insurance business so he can finally retire. But a troublesome employee is holding him back: his daughter. In this episode of How To!, Harvard Business School professor Christina Wing tries to help Kyle figure out how to sell his company without…
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How to Talk to Your Kid About Sex
Thirteen-year-old Henry seems like a model son. He gets good grades, plays on the hockey team, and has a solid group of friends. But Henry’s been spending a lot more time on the internet, and recently brought up something that troubled his parents—that a woman could ruin a man’s career by…
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How to Control Your Thoughts
Emilia can’t stop thinking about a long-ago love affair with Ivan, a man she met in Mexico in her early 20s and dated for several years. Now, a decade later, Emilia is newly married, but thoughts of her time with Ivan pop into her mind daily, a fact she’s never shared with her husband. On this...
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How to Argue With Your Spouse (And Stay In Love)
Lauren and Carlos are afraid their marriage is at a breaking point. With Carlos out of work, an active toddler to care for, and another child on the way, Lauren and Carlos are feeling pressures familiar to many newlyweds—and the pandemic has only made it worse. Can we help this couple find their...
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How to Teach Your Kids Resilience
Is there a right way to let kids struggle and fail? How do you raise resilient children? And most important, when should you help out, and when should you chill out? We ask Wendy Mogel, author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee to advise a Portland, Oregon, couple who worry about their son…
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How To Run (Even When It's Painful)
Sophie Power once breastfed her newborn during an ultramarathon, but an upcoming 268-mile race across a remote stretch of Great Britain is freaking her out. We turn to Wim Hof, aka "The Iceman," for advice. Because when you are worried about pain, you should definitely consult a Dutch extreme...
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How To Stop Worrying So Much
Matt has anxiety attacks. Every day. When he gets too many texts, when he starts worrying about his family, when the unexpected occurs—that’s when the sweat starts and his mind begins racing. He’s a strong guy—he was a cop—but he thinks today’s problem is connected to a tragic event in the past,...
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How To Sleep Better
Ben, also know as "Sleepless in San Francisco" hasn't been able to get a good night's rest for over a decade. He's tried noise machines, medication, vodka, even eating cheese -- but nothing has worked. In this episode of How To!, we bring in Andy Puddicombe, a former Buddhist monk and co-founder…
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How to Bounce Back From Injury
Jami's dealt with chronic knee instability and dislocations since childhood, two major surgeries, years of tedious rehab. Now she wants to actually trust her body again before starting a family, not just tolerate it. She talks to Tom Morrison, a mobility coach who thinks most people rehab wrong:...
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How to Improve Cyclists' Safety from Dangerous Non-Cyclists' Behavior
Amateur cyclist and university associate professor Wendy loves riding her bike with her young son and local road group, but aggressive drivers, close calls, and a deep-seated hostility toward cyclists leave her fearing for their safety on the road. Enter Meredith Glaser, CEO of the Urban Cycling...
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How To Stop Being an Emotional ATM
Last week, our expert Arthur Brooks gave us some surefire advice for resetting the parent-child relationship so your kids don't treat you like an emotional ATM. On this episode of How To!, he's going to teach our listener, Karen, how to balance the books, so to speak, by taking some withdrawals…
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How to Get Your Kids to Take Good Risks
Today on How To!, Freddy, a physician, scientist, and father, struggles with how to mentor his 12-year-old daughter, who prefers her safe comfort zone and strongly resists new experiences, travel, or unfamiliar foods. Host Mike Pesca brings on stand-up comedian and Parenting is a Joke podcast…
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How to Feel Good in Your Clothes
Today on How To!, Michael, a retired FDNY captain who used to rely on a uniform every day, finds himself staring blankly into his closet and canceling dates because he does not know how to dress. Host Mike Pesca brings on Tavia Sharp, an executive image and personal brand strategist and founder…
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How to Hire Someone and Be a Good Boss
Comedian and Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! panelist Paula Poundstone splits her time among a grueling tour schedule and a chaotic home life, but she wants to find the focus necessary to manage her household staff and stop letting her deep aversion to conflict ruin her business. Enter Nedra Glover...
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How To Keep Cool in a Crisis
Originally Aired on Oct 12, 2021 On this episode of How To!, the second in a two part-series, Dan Christensen, a bus driver in Portland, Oregon, and Matt Smith, a crisis intervention trainer and the co-founder of Aegis Training Solutions, are back to teach you what to do when a fight is already...
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How Constraints Make Us More Creative
Ofra splits her time among a number of hobbies in her retirement, but she wants to stop feeling rudderless and find the focus necessary to write a book of observational humor based on her twenty-year career as a psychotherapist. Enter David Epstein, workplace researcher and author of Inside the...
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Should I Choose Passion or a Stable Job?
India splits her time between contract production and agency work, but she wants to stop prioritizing other people's projects to scale her personal brand. Enter Simone Stolzoff, workplace researcher and author of The Good Enough Job, who advocates for building a multi-pronged freelance career...
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How To Make New Friends as an Adult
Steven racks up acquaintances on group mountain bike rides, but he cannot turn a casual trailhead hello into a real friendship. For decades he coasted on the built-in connections of being in a band, working in a lab, and having a wife who did the social legwork. But now he needs to make some new...
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Beating Yourself Up? The 10-Second Play That Outsmarts Your Inner Critic
This week we're sharing a special episode from our friends at Mentally Stronger with Therapist Amy Morin — the Webby Award–winning podcast hosted by psychotherapist and mental strength trainer Amy Morin, whose TEDx talk has been viewed more than 25 million times and whose books have sold over a...
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How To Ditch Your Distractions Once and For All
There's one thing that all of Helena's personal projects have in common: they remain unfinished. The family photo album is empty, as is her mom's recipe book. And the lavender garden is still unplanted. Helena is not lazy. In fact, she's a busy lawyer who has no problem finishing tasks at the...
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How To Get Into Wine
Today on How To!, Ross, a TV director who enjoys a drink but feels intimidated by the pretension of the wine world, levels up his wine knowledge. Mike brings on journalist and The Corrupt Wine Writer Substack author Joel Stein to cut through the snobbery, explain why you shouldn't be afraid to…
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How To Connect With An Audience
Guitarist and orchestrator Dillon Kondor knows his way around a stage. It's everything in between the songs that trips him up. Speaking to a crowd, filling the silence, not coming off stiff or defensive, that's where his confidence disappears. After too many gigs derailed by awkward pauses and...
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How to Coach Your Kid
Brian stepped up to coach his 7-year-old daughter's soccer team to save their season, but there's one major catch: he's never actually played the sport. Now battling imposter syndrome and the pressure of intense parental expectations, he feels completely overwhelmed. On this episode of How To!…
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How To Maximize Your Credit Card Points
Al has over a million American Express points and dreams of booking another once-in-a-lifetime luxury vacation for his family. But the opaque, frustrating system of transferring and redeeming rewards has him completely paralyzed. On this episode of How To!, Mike brings on Elliot Rosenberg…
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How To Bounce Back From Burnout
When Betsy joined her last workplace, she thought it was a perfect fit. It was on a list of Best Places to Work and she got to be creative while helping people. But as the startup rapidly grew, the company culture changed and Betsy started to lose herself amid the stress. Then she got laid off....
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How To Manage Your Anger
Tyler holds himself to high expectations, placing a deep value on self-sufficiency and the social contract. But as a science teacher and dad to a blended family, he gets incredibly frustrated when others do not hold themselves to those same standards. On this episode of How To!, Mike brings on...
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ENCORE How To Make a Huge Decision In 60 Minutes... Or Less
To move or not to move? That is the question for Tiffani. She is desperate to get out of her hometown in rural Oregon and find a place with affordable housing, better dating prospects, and a ballroom dance studio nearby… or at least a P.F. Chang's closer than a four hour drive away. The problem?...
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How To Solve a Mystery
Brett has spent her career in foreign policy — shaping strategy, advising governments, moving pieces on a board whose outcomes she may never live to fully see. It's meaningful work. It just never feels finished. So she's started thinking about a different kind of problem: the kind with a…
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How To Communicate with Your Pet
Living with a cat often feels like a game of high-stakes interpretation, especially when an 18-pound Maine Coon is performing a 4:30 AM tap dance on your head. Today on How To!, Mike Pesca is joined by cat owner Steve, who shares the reality of navigating the vocal demands of his feline…
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How to Not Say "Um"
Relying on filler words like "um," "like," and "you know" is a universal habit that clutters our speech and betrays our nerves, but simply willing yourself to stop only makes the problem worse. Today on How To!, Mike Pesca is joined by renowned data journalist and author Nate Silver, who bravely...
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How To Protect The Elderly From Scammers
Getting older brings new vulnerabilities, especially when navigating the sophisticated, ever-evolving world of financial scams targeting seniors. Today on How To!, Mike Pesca is joined by journalist Nancy Rommelmann, who shares the harrowing personal reality of watching her mother fall prey to...
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How To Take Psychedelics for Your Mental Health with Dr. Will Van Derveer
Stand-up comedian and philosopher Myq Kaplan has built a successful career exploring the human condition, but navigating his own underlying anxiety presents a very different challenge. He knows how to handle recreational and spiritual psychedelic trips in the jungles of Peru, but the leap to...
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How To Make A How To Podcast
Mike Pesca has built a long career as a news analyst and podcaster, but taking over the How To! franchise presents a very different challenge: learning the ropes of the advice show genre. He knows how to dissect complex political events, but the leap to solving eccentric listener dilemmas while...
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How To Ghostbust The Old Fashioned Way
Enid Baxter Ryce has built a fascinating career as an artist and university professor, but her unique living situation presents a very different challenge: navigating life on a massive, decommissioned, and potentially haunted military base. She knows how to uncover the historical art left behind…
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How to Emigrate as a Throuple
Dan Savage has built a legendary career giving sex and relationship advice, but as the U.S. political climate shifts, he's yearning to chase a very different dream: relocating his polyamorous family to Europe. He knows how to navigate complex relationship dynamics, but the leap to untangling...
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How To Be a DJ, Not a Playlist with Tom Nash
Stewart has built a respectable career as a lawyer in Montreal, but he's yearning to chase a very different dream: becoming a club DJ. He knows how to curate a killer playlist, but the leap to commanding a live room feels intimidating and technically out of reach. On this episode: How To!'s Mike...
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Announcing: How To! with Mike Pesca
How To! has a new host - veteran journalist and podcaster Mike Pesca, host of The Gist, Not Even Mad, and Funny You Should Mention podcasts. It's the same great Ambie Award nominated show, covering new topics, with new experts, and Mike's signature humor. You've got questions. We find answers. We...
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How To Start Writing (w/ Anna Quindlen & John Dickerson) Encore
You've probably heard about the importance of journaling, putting thoughts on paper to help process the daily vicissitudes of life. But it's easy to stall once you see a blank page or get self conscious about what exactly you're writing. On this episode of How To!, we bring together Anna…
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Now Is the Time to Escape Your Bad Relationship. Here's How. (Encore)
Dating is always tough, but during a pandemic it can feel downright impossible. "I'm incredibly lonely, and it's impossible to meet anybody my age right now," our listener Sarah said. Feeling isolated, Sarah has clung to a friends-with-benefit situation with Matthew, her friend and dance partner....
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How To Rob a Bank (Encore)
Joe Loya robbed over 30 banks during an 18-month span before going to jail. In this episode of How To! Charles wants to rob one bank on a Saturday afternoon, and get away scot-free. Can Joe teach Charles the tricks of the trade? Or will he shatter his dreams, and a few stereotypes along the way?...
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How To Never Miss a Deadline (Encore)
Avalon is driven, creative, and… can't meet a deadline to save her life. In her defense, she's a card-carrying member of the gig economy, juggling a complicated schedule as a DJ and visual artist. Avalon's tried to organize her life using a bullet journal, but procrastination keeps getting in the...
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How To Know When to Quit Your Job (Encore)
Victor's job—at its core—is to change the world. But he feels like he's plateaued within his large humanitarian and development organization, and is now on the verge of jumping ship. On this episode of How To!, Annie Duke, author of Quit: The Power Of Knowing When to Walk Away, helps Victor…
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How To Confront a Vindictive Neighbor with Tig Notaro (Encore)
The trouble began when Sarah put a fern in front of her new condo. Nice, right? The woman who lives in the unit above didn't think so, and without warning sent Sarah a slew of passive-aggressive notes. Sarah thinks it's all a big misunderstanding, but now her neighbor refuses to even speak to…
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Our Favorite Advice of 2025
In 2025, our listeners contacted How To! for advice about outsmarting student loans, moving to a new city, hosting a low-key gathering, living with chronic pain, quitting a dream job, letting go of ADHD shame, and yes, losing your virginity in your 40s. Today on the show: Carvell Wallace and...
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Quick Fix: Date Night Done Right
Tired of being the project manager for date night? On this bonus episode of How To!, Jackie Kelley explains how to make logistics equitable and easy—so your partner can help. Plus: a tip for quickly finding restaurants when date night is spontaneous. Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send...
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How To Create 'Marriage Rules' as a Couple
Cohabitation can be bliss—except when it comes to your partner's incompatible approach to household tasks. Bonnie likes things clean, organized, and prompt. Vince, on the other hand, is a classic procrastinator. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on self-described "human...
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Quick Fix: Sexual Fawning
In this bonus episode, Dr. Ingrid Clayton discusses another aspect of everyday life where fawning can show up and take over: sex. Ingrid tells How To!'s Courtney Martin about the ways we lose ourselves during sex—and how we can reconnect with our needs. How To!'s Quick Fix is produced by Rosemary...
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How To Stop Fawning
When clinical psychologist, trauma therapist, and complex trauma survivor Dr. Ingrid Clayton learned about fawning — the fourth "F" after fight, flight, and freeze — she felt like this was the missing piece that explained her whole life. On this episode of How To!, Ingrid talks to Courtney Martin...
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How To Sing in Front of Other People
Slate staff writer Rebecca Onion wants to improve her singing voice, but she's unsure about belting it out in public. On this episode, How To!'s Carvell Wallace introduces her to G. Phillip Shoultz III, associate director of VocalEssence, for advice on strengthening her voice, performing with...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
You've got questions. We find answers.We all need advice, but it's not always clear who to ask. Each week, Mike Pesca invites a listener on the show to tackle a real problem, like protecting our elderly loved ones from scammers, emigrating as a throuple, and speaking without saying "um" - all with help from world-class experts: attorneys, doctors, entrepreneurs, authors, researchers - who actually know what they're talking about. Think of it as eavesdropping on someone else's therapy session, without the co-pay or awkward silence.
HOSTED BY
Peach Fish Projects
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