Real Talk with Lisa Sonni: Relationships Uncensored

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You keep trying to make sense of it. Maybe he didn’t mean it. Maybe you misunderstood. Maybe you’re overthinking.The reality? Confusion is not the problem. It’s the outcome. When someone can hurt you and comfort you in the same breath, your brain tries to reconcile two realities that don’t belong together. He loves you and he harms you. He apologizes and repeats it. That contradiction is what keeps you stuck trying to figure it out. In this “Best Of” Real Talk episode, Lisa pulls together powerful insights from Dr. Peter Salerno, Aishia Grevenberg, Dr. Les Carter, and Brent MacLerie to expose what is actually happening beneath that confusion. They break down how manipulation often hides behind subtle behavior, how entitlement drives repeated harm, and why the idea that “he doesn’t know what he’s doing” keeps you trapped longer. When behavior repeats, especially when it hurts you, that is not confusion. That is information. The clarity you’ve been searching for is not in understanding him better. It’s in seeing the pattern clearly and trusting what it’s already showing you. 🎧 Listen to the full episodes: Dr. Peter Salerno: https://youtu.be/_gKCmT1YazY Aishia Grevenberg: https://youtu.be/-LeQ9ZwtcGY Dr. Les Carter: https://youtu.be/kU5siEWppf8 Brent MacLerie: https://youtu.be/aibF4SAjX_8Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!"Physical touch is his love language." "If you loved him, you'd just do it." "If you were having more sex with him, maybe he wouldn't cheat." You've heard these. Maybe you've even believed them. These aren't relationship truths. They're the exact language used to override your instincts and make you question what you already know. In this Best Of episode, Lisa brings together the most powerful moments from her conversations with Dr. Danielle Kramer, Dr. Kate Balestrieri, and Nat LaJune, four voices, four perspectives, all pointing to the same truth: sexual entitlement inside a committed relationship is coercion. Coercion is abuse. If your bedroom feels like an obligation instead of a connection, that's not a you problem. When someone believes your body is something they're owed, intimacy doesn't just suffer, it dies. And it's being killed on purpose. Your feelings matter. Your discomfort matters. Your no matters. Links to the full episodes with Dr. Danielle Kramer, Dr. Kate Balestrieri, and Nat LaJune are below.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You didn’t become someone else overnight. You were shaped into someone who could survive him.It starts quietly. The confidence he once admired becomes “too much.” Your opinions become “dramatic.” Slowly, almost imperceptibly, you begin editing yourself to keep the peace. What feels like compromise is actually erosion.In this conversation, Lisa sits down with Dr. Peter Salerno to expose the psychological process behind how strong, self-aware women lose themselves in abusive relationships.  It is patterned, strategic, and deeply disorienting. They unpack how abusers study your strengths, then weaponize them, how intermittent reinforcement conditions you to stay, and how the relationship becomes a system that rewards your self-abandonment while punishing your authenticity.They also break down the moment everything flips, when you stop assessing him and start managing yourself. The confusion, the self-doubt, the constant internal analysis. None of it is weakness. It is conditioning.By the time you leave, the deepest loss is not just the relationship. It is the version of you that slowly disappeared inside it.Healing is not just about understanding what happened. It is about rebuilding self-respect so fully that you can never be trained out of yourself again.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You were never “too sensitive.” You were surrounded by lies repeated so often they started to feel like truth. Abuse is rare. Women lie. Men and women do it equally. None of these are facts, and believing them keeps you stuck questioning your own reality.In this conversation, Lisa sits down with Brent McLearie, creator of the “These Are Not Facts” series, to dismantle the narratives that quietly protect abuse while discrediting survivors. They break down how these myths spread, why they are so convincing, and how they distort the way we interpret harm, credibility, and responsibility. When abuse is framed as rare, survivors struggle to name it. When false accusations are exaggerated, survivors stay silent. When everything is flattened into “equal,” the truth disappears.Brent brings data and context to what survivors already feel in their bodies, that something is off about the way the world talks about abuse. Together, they expose how these narratives shift focus away from perpetrators and onto survivors, forcing them to defend their pain instead of being supported through it.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Sexual entitlement isn’t “a relationship issue.” It’s a belief system. It’s the mindset that your body comes with the marriage, the title, the ring, the label, the contract, the “needs.” It’s the idea that your availability lives on standby, no matter how he treats you, no matter what your body feels, no matter what your nervous system is screaming.This is a rare solo episode, but you’re not listening to me alone. I’m reading three anonymous stories from women who volunteered to share what’s happening inside coercive, entitled relationships, where “no” turns into punishment, pressure, guilt, and emotional warfare. Names and identifying details have been removed, and the audio will be edited for clarity.This isn’t about different libidos. It’s not about two people feeling disconnected sometimes. It’s not “schedule it in” advice. This is about men who act like sex is owed, men who track it, count it, demand it, punish you for it, and then flip it on you when you don’t comply. It’s about how consent gets turned into a debate, how your character ends up on trial, and how women end up using their bodies to manage a man’s mood, not because they want to, but because they feel like they have to.If you feel tense instead of turned on when he initiates, that makes sense. If you feel numb, braced, guilty, or like you’re calculating consequences in your head, that makes sense. If you’ve ever found yourself initiating just to avoid the coldness, the slamming, the rage, the sulking, the withdrawal, or the escalation, listen closely. That’s not intimacy. That’s survival.And when he calls it “withholding,” “rejection,” “weaponizing sex,” or even “emotional abuse,” pay attention to what’s happening. A lot of abusive men use therapy language and “healthy relationship” talk to make you doubt your reality and to force a false equivalency, so you end up defending yourself instead of seeing the pattern.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!In this episode of Real Talk with Lisa Sonni: Relationships Uncensored, Lisa speaks with Angela Van, CEO of Family Court Corner, about the realities of divorcing and co-parenting with an abusive or highly destructive partner. Angela shares lessons from her own ten-year custody battle—one that reached the Supreme Court of Canada—and explains how she now helps survivors navigate divorce, custody disputes, and post-separation abuse.The discussion focuses heavily on strategy. Angela explains how abusive partners often create constant distractions and conflicts to keep survivors emotionally engaged and reactive. This pattern can drain energy, escalate conflict, and damage credibility during divorce or custody battles. Learning to disengage, manage emotional responses, and shift focus back to personal growth and stability can be a powerful way to regain control during this process.The episode also examines how emotional dysregulation, ego, and understandable anger can unintentionally work against survivors in family court. Judges, lawyers, and professionals observing the situation often see only behavior in the moment, not the long history of abuse behind it. Because of this, maintaining composure, documenting behavior, and refusing to be pulled into conflict can become critical parts of protecting both oneself and one’s children.Throughout the conversation, Angela shares practical insights on navigating high-conflict divorce, handling custody disputes with abusive partners, and maintaining emotional boundaries during co-parenting with someone who continues to provoke conflict. The goal is not only survival during the legal process, but ultimately growth and empowerment beyond it.Topics discussed in this episode include post-separation abuse, family court strategy, divorcing an abusive partner, custody battles with toxic ex-partners, emotional regulation during divorce proceedings, co-parenting with a high-conflict parent, and reclaiming personal power after leaving an abusive relationship.If you are interested in relationship psychology, toxic relationship recovery, custody battles, or strategies for navigating divorce with an abusive partner, this episode offers insight from someone who has lived through the process and now helps others do the same.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Couples therapy is not the place to sort out coercive control. Full stop. But I also get why women end up there anyway, because when your relationship is messy, you’re trying to name what’s happening. Is it stress. Is it trauma. Is it aggression. Is it abuse. And when you’re living inside it, it can all blur.I sat down with Dr. Marina Rosenthal, psychologist, couples therapist, and sex therapist with a background in trauma psychology and violence against women research, to talk about that murky middle. The high conflict stuff that feels awful, the dynamics that get minimized as “just communication,” and the moments that get used to confuse you even more.We break down why language matters, why “abuse” gets debated while behaviors get ignored, and why asking “is it abuse?” often isn’t the most useful starting point. We talk coercive control, sexual coercion, threats, weaponized calm, the praise that keeps you in line, and the way power shows up through money, freedom, access, and the invisible consequences you learn to avoid.We also go into Darvo, false equivalency, the trap of “you’re both toxic,” and what actually helps you assess safety without getting stuck in labels. Real talk, lots of nuance, but still clear. You’re not crazy for being confused. Confusion is part of the system.Dr. Marina also shares where to find her free resource “Red Flags and Red Lines” to help you figure out whether couples therapy is even safe to attempt.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!For years, women have been told they’re codependent. Too attached, too emotional, too responsible for everyone else’s feelings. And a lot of you have worn that label like proof that something is wrong with you. So I brought on Terri Cole, licensed psychotherapist, boundary expert, and the voice behind “high-functioning codependency,” to talk about what this word actually means, how it gets misused, and why it can erase power, context, and safety when we’re talking about emotionally unsafe men. We get into self-abandonment, the auto-yes, the low-grade resentment that never seems to have a clear source, and the way “being the capable one” can turn into a full-time job you never applied for. We also talk about boundaries in real life, what changes when someone is toxic or controlling, and why some women don’t recognize themselves in the classic codependency story even when they’re exhausted, overextended, and carrying everything. Terri also shares the definition she uses, why she coined the term high-functioning codependency, and the small daily shifts that start giving you your life back. Resources she shared: boundaryquiz.com https://www.terricole.com/btc/Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!The Manosphere isn’t “just podcasts.” It’s a curriculum teaching men how to destabilize, dominate, and call it leadership.If you’ve ever sat across from a man who suddenly started talking about “alpha” energy, final decision-making power, or how you “owe” him sex… you’re not imagining the shift. Something changed…and it likely wasn’t you.In this conversation, Lisa sits down with Rafael Gomez, host of Women on Men, to expose how red pill ideology repackages abuse as masculinity. They unpack negging, withdrawal as control, sexual entitlement, and the quiet conditioning that teaches men to see relationships as power struggles instead of partnerships. Rafael shares what he’s seeing firsthand: men being fed insecurity, calling it strength, and sabotaging their own relationships in the process.Together, Lisa and Rafael are naming the systems hurting everyone — including the men trapped inside them.Real masculinity is integrity, emotional maturity, and the courage to build something equal.When we tell the truth about what’s happening, we stop internalizing it.And that’s where your power comes back.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Most women don’t stay because they’re naïve.They stay because they believe he’s just immature.He’s still growing. He’ll change. He just needs insight.But what if he understands exactly what he’s doing?Lisa sits down with Dr. Les Carter of Surviving Narcissism to dismantle one of the most dangerous myths survivors cling to: that abusiveness is just immaturity. They unpack the difference between someone who lacks skills and someone who lacks conscience, the role of power, the allergy to accountability, and the DARVO spiral. You know that smugness that shows up when they’ve successfully baited you into reacting? Dr. Carter explains why true maturity requires self-examination, and why narcissistic individuals rarely sustain change. Insight isn’t the same as transformation. Window dressing isn’t growth.  If you’ve spent years explaining, rationalizing, and over-functioning in hopes he’d finally “get it,” this conversation may be the clarity you’ve been avoiding (and the freedom you’ve needed).Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!“Everybody’s a feminist… until a woman chooses to be a tradwife.”That line gets thrown around like it ends the conversation. It doesn’t. It starts it.Not all stay-at-home moms are oppressed. Not all traditional marriages are abusive. But when a woman gives up financial independence in a system built on patriarchal entitlement, the risk shifts, and pretending it doesn’t is how women get trapped.Lisa sits down with Lisa from The Audaci-Tea Podcast to untangle the difference between choice and conditioning. They unpack the unpaid labor of motherhood, the myth that “he’ll take care of you,” weaponized incompetence, and why men call staying home a “privilege” they rarely volunteer to take themselves.They talk about the motherhood penalty, financial control, emotional neglect, and the reality that many women leave marriages worse off than when they entered them — even after years of sacrifice.This isn’t an attack on motherhood. It’s a reality check about power. When your labor isn’t valued, compensated, or protected, that’s vulnerability.Go in with your eyes open.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You’re not “bad at asking for help.” You’re exhausted from carrying everything and being told it’s your fault.In this conversation, Lisa sits down with author and creator Laura Danger to name what so many women are living with but struggling to explain: weaponized incompetence. Not the harmless “oops, I forgot,” but the pattern of strategic failing, defensiveness, and avoidance that forces women to overcompensate emotionally, mentally, and physically. Together, they break down how pretending not to know, asking for lists, and doing things poorly on purpose aren’t misunderstandings but rather power moves. Laura explains how this behavior shows up in caregiving, household labor, and relationships, and why it often crosses the line from unfair to abusive.This episode exposes why women’s “reactions” get framed as the problem, why men still benefit even in unhappy marriages, and why the burden always lands back on her to manage, explain, soften, and tolerate. If you’ve ever felt crazy for being furious about dishes, laundry, or childcare, this conversation will help you see the bigger truth.Weaponized incompetence isn’t about chores. It’s about who gets to opt out and who pays for that choice.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!“If it was really abuse, you would’ve left.”    That lie has kept countless women silent and blamed for something that was never their fault.  Psychological abuse is designed to confuse you. In this conversation, Lisa sits down with trauma therapist and survivor Chelli Pumphrey to expose why so many women don’t recognize abuse while they’re in it.  Together, they unpack attachment theory, personality “super traits,” and how empathy, loyalty, optimism, and a belief in repair get weaponized against women who would never intentionally harm another person. Chelli shares her own story, even as a trained therapist, and names the shame that comes with realizing you were manipulated anyway. This episode dismantles the myth that abuse only happens to “certain kinds” of women. It explains why secure, capable, emotionally intelligent women are often targeted, and why staying isn’t a failure of strength, but the result of exploitation by design. If you’ve ever asked yourself, “How did I not see it?” - this conversation will finally make it make sense. Here are two helpful resources to support your next steps: 1. Personality.co Test 2. She Rises Collective: A trauma informed healing community where women reclaim their voices, rebuild their confidence, and rise together, surrounded by women who truly get it. Co-led by Lisa Sonni and Chelli Pumphrey.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You’re not “too sensitive.” You’re reacting to a system that teaches men entitlement and then calls women dramatic for pushing back. If accountability feels like a constant uphill battle in your relationships, there’s a reason.In this conversation, Lisa sits down with Lex, a psychotherapist and male creator who’s willing to say the quiet part out loud. Together, they dismantle the myth that women “don’t take accountability” and name what’s actually happening underneath the defensiveness, blame-shifting, and emotional shutdown so many women are navigating. Lex shares how unpacking his own internalized misogyny changed the way he understands relationships, power, and responsibility,  and why men centering themselves in conversations about harm is part of the problem, not the solution. This conversation weaves together patriarchy, emotional suppression, entitlement, and why abuse thrives where accountability is avoided.If you’ve ever been told you “provoked” mistreatment, carried the emotional labor for two people, or felt like your pain was dismissed as an attack, this conversation will help you see the truth clearly. Accountability isn’t cruelty. It’s the bare minimum.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!From the outside, it looks like a happy marriage: smiling photos, family dinners, and church events. Inside the house, it is a completely different story.Lisa is joined by survivor turned coach Sarah White for an honest conversation about the quiet, hidden abuse that lives behind the image of the “good relationship.” Together, they unpack why so many women stay silent, protect the man hurting them, and convince themselves that what is happening is not really abuse. Sarah shares how emotional abuse, sexual coercion, gaslighting, and chronic confusion slowly eroded her health, her self trust, and her sense of safety. They talk about the pressure to perform happiness, especially inside religious communities, and the fear of being judged for leaving a marriage that looks perfect from the outside.This episode explores the toll emotional abuse takes on the body, why confusion is a warning sign, and how kindness and cruelty can exist in the same relationship. Lisa names the moment many survivors resist but eventually face: He knows he is hurting you, and waiting for him to understand only keeps you trapped.If you have ever cried alone after family gatherings, questioned your reality, or wondered why your body feels constantly on edge, this conversation will help you see the truth without shame.You are not betraying anyone by choosing yourself, you are finally telling the truth.Reach Sarah WhiteInstagram: @echosofherbravery or @sarahjeanettteeeWeb: www.echosofherbravery.comEmail: [email protected] the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!If you have ever thought, “I just need him to understand”, the truth is, he already does.Lisa is joined by therapist and survivor Aishia Grevenberg for a raw, no-nonsense conversation about why abusive men do not change through communication, therapy, or better explanations. Together, they dismantle the comforting myth that he is confused, emotionally unaware, or just needs you to say it differently.They explore why abusive men communicate just fine at work, with friends, and in public, yet suddenly “don’t understand” when you express pain. Why couples therapy often makes things worse. Why explaining, proving, and defending yourself keeps you stuck. And why abuse is not a communication issue, but a power issue rooted in entitlement and control.Aishia breaks down how men use emotional reactions as fuel, how calm becomes your exit instead of your weapon, and why waiting for an epiphany is not the same as change. Lisa weaves in lived experience, naming the moment many survivors finally see the truth. He heard you, he understood you, and he chose to keep hurting you.Freedom begins when you stop explaining and start listening to what his behavior has been telling you all along.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Abusers do not just lie. They build entire realities that feel safer than the truth. Realities where doubt keeps you tethered, confusion feels normal, and leaving feels unthinkable. If you have ever felt like you were trapped inside a story you could not escape, this conversation will land deep.Lisa sits down with psychologist and author Dr. Alan Godwin to unpack how abusers construct false realities through isolation, narrative control, and emotional manipulation. Together, they explore how these story-based fortresses are built slowly, why they target our deepest need to belong, and how abnormal behavior becomes normalized over time. What begins as trust turns into attachment, and attachment becomes the very thing used against you.Alan explains why intelligent, self-aware people are especially vulnerable. Not because they are naive, but because abusers exploit empathy, loyalty, and the human instinct to give the benefit of the doubt. Lisa weaves in lived experience, naming the moment when what is true gets replaced with what only sounds true, and why survivors often end up defending the lie that is hurting them.This episode is about understanding how you became blind, and why that blindness was never a personal failure.The truth cracks the fortress. And once you see it, you can begin finding your way back to yourself.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You’re not crazy for thinking therapy would help. You were taught that relationships can be “fixed” if you just try harder, communicate better, or show more empathy. But when you sit beside someone who thrives on blame, chaos, and control, therapy doesn’t heal the relationship, it becomes another weapon used against you. Dr. Peter Salerno, psychotherapist and expert in personality pathology, joins Lisa to dismantle one of the most dangerous myths survivors are sold: that couples counseling can repair abusive dynamics. He breaks down why disordered partners don’t collaborate, why they show up as “model clients,” and how therapists who aren’t trained in pathology end up validating abuse, deepening your confusion, and escalating the danger. Together they expose how language from therapy (boundaries, respect, communication) gets twisted into ammunition, and why survivors often leave sessions questioning themselves instead of the abuse. This conversation is a lifeline if you’ve ever left therapy feeling smaller, more ashamed, or more bonded to someone who’s harming you. You’re not the problem, the dynamic is. Seeing the truth is the first step toward reclaiming your safety, clarity, and self.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You didn’t “miss the signs.” Your brain protected you from them.That’s not stupidity, it’s survival.Dr. Jennifer Freyd, the researcher who coined the term DARVO and “betrayal blindness,” joins Lisa to unpack the psychology behind why survivors don’t see abuse while it’s happening. Together, they break down how the mind hides danger to preserve attachment, why love and dependence make leaving so hard, and how abusers exploit that instinct to keep you blind.This episode isn’t about shame, it’s about biology. Your brain did exactly what it was built to do: protect you from losing the person you thought you needed. Seeing that truth is the beginning of your freedom.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!You can’t love a narcissist hard enough to make them change.And loyalty isn’t the cure — it’s the trap.In this powerful conversation, Lisa sits down with psychologist and narcissism expert Dr. Elinor Greenberg to dismantle the fantasy that love or faith can “fix” someone who refuses to see themselves. Dr. Greenberg breaks down why narcissists don’t collaborate in therapy, how “reluctant obedience” can masquerade as progress, and why their apologies often serve performance, not repair. Together, they expose the illusion of change and the emotional cost of waiting for it.Dr. Greenberg also introduces her concept of Narcissistic Judo — practical, reality-based strategies to help survivors protect their peace when they can’t yet leave. This episode is both validating and disarming, cutting through the noise with clarity and compassion: you didn’t fail to love them right. They failed to love you at all.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Control doesn’t always look like control. Sometimes it looks like care, protection, or “respect.” That’s what makes coercive control the most dangerous form of abuse because it hides in plain sight.Dr. Christine Cocchiola, clinician, survivor, and one of the world’s leading experts on coercive control, joins Lisa to expose the playbook every abusive man uses. From “I just don’t like your friends” to “I’m only trying to protect you,” Christine breaks down how control starts as suggestion, grows through compliance, and ends in captivity. Together, they reveal why love was never the problem, the erosion of your liberty was.This conversation shatters the myth that abuse only counts if it leaves a bruise. When he controls your choices, your time, your body, or your sense of self… that’s not love, that’s domination disguised as devotion.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Therapists hear what people say in marriage. Divorce lawyers see what people do when it ends. And what they see tells the truth about power, control, and the quiet games that keep women stuck in “high-conflict” divorces. Lisa sits down with family lawyer and content creator Justin Lee to expose the patterns behind the myth that “women ruin men in divorce.” They unpack how abusers weaponize the court system — dragging out cases, withholding money, and using children as pawns — while claiming victimhood online. Justin breaks down what really happens behind the scenes: why women file after years of trying, how financial control becomes legal abuse, and why the system isn’t rigged for women, but against fairness itself. This conversation is a masterclass in seeing through the “crazy ex-wife” narrative and a reminder that justice may take time, but your peace is worth fighting for.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!“Abuse isn’t gendered.”That phrase gets thrown around every time women speak up. Yet,  it’s not true and it’s not harmless.Lisa sits down with Rebecca Pacheco, Education and Development Manager at Embrave: Agency to End Violence, to break down why gender can’t be removed from the conversation on violence. Together they unpack the difference between domestic violence and gender-based violence, the patriarchal systems that sustain abuse, and how funding cuts and systemic neglect leave survivors with nowhere to turn.Rebecca shares what life looks like on the front lines — shelters filled beyond capacity, survivors turned away, and the impossible choices women face when “just leaving” isn’t an option. This isn’t about politics or blaming men; it’s about naming the truth. Abuse is rooted in inequality, entitlement, and the belief that power belongs to one gender. Naming that truth is how we change it.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!If you’ve ever said yes to sex when every part of you wanted to say no, that’s not “being a good partner,” It’s coercion. Coercion is abuse.Lisa sits down with certified sex therapist and clinical sexologist Dr. Danielle Kramer to talk about sexual coercion, consent, and how entitlement destroys intimacy. They unpack the cultural conditioning that teaches men to pursue and women to comply — and how that conditioning turns connection into control.Dr. Kramer breaks down the difference between persuasion and coercion, how purity culture fuels sexual shame, and what healing looks like when you’ve been taught your body is an obligation.This conversation will make you rethink what real consent and intimacy actually mean — and remind you that sex isn’t something done to you. It’s something done with you.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!“If it was really abuse, you would’ve left.” That lie has silenced survivors for decades. The truth? Most women in abusive relationships don’t know it’s abuse, because abusers work hard to make sure they don’t. Lisa sits down with trauma therapist and “Love & Trust Therapist” Chelli Pumphrey to unpack the psychology behind not knowing. They dive into gaslighting, cognitive dissonance, and how abusers weaponize your empathy, optimism, and attachment against you. Chelli also shares her own story — as both a therapist and survivor — revealing how smart, capable women can still get trapped in psychological warfare disguised as love. This conversation will help you truly understand that manipulation is by design. Naming that truth is where your healing begins.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!We keep telling men to “open up” and “be more emotional,” but that’s not the problem — and it’s definitely not the solution. Real strength isn’t found in suppressing feelings or turning men into girlfriends; it’s found in presence, purpose, and the courage to lead with heart and integrity. Lisa sits down with men’s coach Nick Matiash, founder of The Evolved Man, to dismantle outdated myths about masculinity, fatherhood, and emotional expression. Nick shares how breaking down on his kitchen floor with a newborn at home became the turning point that reshaped his understanding of what real manhood looks like — not fragile, not performative, but grounded. This conversation cuts through culture-war noise and gets to the truth: men aren’t broken, but what they’ve been taught about being a man is. If you’ve ever felt unseen by the men in your life — or wondered why connection feels so hard to build — this one’s for you.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!When a relationship feels like oxygen at first and a chokehold later, you’re not “being dramatic”—you’re being indoctrinated. Narcissistic abuse doesn’t look like a one-off bad boyfriend; it mirrors a cult: love-bombing as recruitment, rules that keep shifting, punishment for noncompliance, and a leader who claims to be the only source of truth and love. If you’ve ever wondered why smart, capable people stay, this is why. Lisa sits down with licensed therapist and author Vanessa M. Reiser, LCSW, to map the cult mechanics of narcissistic relationships: idealize–devalue–discard, the Pavlovian reward/punishment loop that forges a trauma bond, and the “double bind” that ensures you’re wrong whether you comply or resist. They dismantle myths (“I’d never fall for that,” “you could have left anytime”) and name what’s really happening—coercive control that erodes free will, isolates you from your reality checks, and keeps you chasing crumbs after a manufactured high. Vanessa shares clear, clinician-backed ways to reclaim yourself: depersonalize the abuse (“it wasn’t about your worth”), rebuild nervous-system safety, and replace the fantasy with facts. You are not weak for being targeted; predators select, condition, and confuse. Clarity is the exit ramp. With language for what happened and community that reflects your reality back to you, you can break the bond and rebuild a self that’s yours again.  Resources mentioned • Vanessa M. Reiser, LCSW — therapist & author • Dr. Ramani — educator on narcissistic abuse • Dr. Nadine Macaluso — clinician speaking on trauma bondsSupport the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Staying up at night over your daughter’s safety is expected. Losing sleep over your son becoming the guy who drains a woman’s light? That’s the fear most moms whisper about. In a culture that platforms the manosphere and calls misogyny “self-improvement,” mothers are raising kids on two very different battlegrounds.Lisa sits down with creator and mom Grace Presley (the viral “mid-loser” post) to name what so many feel: girls are trained to shrink, accommodate, and survive while boys risk being groomed online into entitlement and contempt. Together they unpack how “nice guy” rhetoric masks exploitation, why boys need modeling (not lectures), and how to teach mental load, empathy, and accountability at home before TikTok and podcasts do it for you. Grace shares the simple practices she uses with her 14-year-old son and the non-negotiables for calling out peers, unlearning enabling, and breaking generational patterns.This isn’t man-hating, it’s future-making. If you’re parenting through the red-pill era, you’re not alone and you’re not powerless. Hold the line on empathy and standards, model what respect looks like, and refuse to raise a daughter who disappears or a son who takes.Resources mentioned:• Grace Presley — TikTok: @HeyGracePressly • Instagram: @GracePressly • Website: AstoriaWorthLoving.com• Books: Atomic Habits — James Clear; Can’t Hurt Me — David Goggins• Referenced manosphere examples: Andrew Tate; Fresh & Fit; Nick Fuentes (contextual discussion)Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Stalking isn’t love, and it's certainly not devotion. It’s control, entitlement, and fear dressed up as “concern.” Survivors know that sickening feeling of being watched, followed, or “checked on,” only to be told they’re imagining it. But as retired Detective Lieutenant Mark Wynn makes clear: stalking is real, it’s dangerous, and it’s often the red flag that precedes lethal violence.With over four decades in policing and global training, Mark exposes how law enforcement has historically failed survivors by treating stalking like an “incident” instead of a course of conduct—a pattern of coercion, intimidation, and surveillance meant to strip away liberty. He and Lisa pull back the curtain on how abusers minimize their behaviors (“I was just sitting in my car,” “I only put a tracker on her phone”), why victims delay reporting, and how trauma responses like denial and appeasement become survival strategies. Through raw stories, chilling stats, and lived experience, they underline what too many minimize: stalking is a pathway to homicide if unchecked.The conversation is sobering but deeply empowering. With the right tools, training, and accountability, stalking can be predicted, prevented, and prosecuted.You are not “crazy” for feeling unsafe. Your instincts are evidence, your safety matters, and there are resources designed to help you trust those instincts and take action.Resources Mentioned- One Love Foundation — healthy relationship education + risk assessment app- Bright Sky app — safety and risk assessment tool- Ontario Domestic Abuse Risk Assessment (ODARA) — police risk assessment model- Lethality Assessment Program (LAP) — by Dr. Jacquelyn Campbell, Johns Hopkins- SPARC: Stalking Prevention, Awareness, & Resource Center- SHARP: Stalking and Harassment Assessment and Risk Profile (via SPARC)- Coercive Control by Evan Stark- Why Do They Kill? by David Adams- The Stalking of Kristin by George Lardner Jr.- Mental Healness (Lee Hammock) — self-aware narcissist creator who supports survivorsSupport the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Somewhere along the way, society convinced us that the battle lines in blended families are always drawn between “evil stepmom” and “bitter baby mama.” But what if the real chaos is coming from the man in the middle—or from a system that thrives on pitting women against each other? Survivors know that nothing fuels abuse and dysfunction like smoke and mirrors, and blended family dynamics are no exception.Lisa sits down with Naja Hall, host of I Know I’m Crazy and founder of VIP Stepmom, to peel back the layers of high-conflict parenting after separation. From stepmoms stepping into landmines they didn’t plant, to biomoms fighting for stability while being mislabeled as “bitter,” Lisa and Naja call out the unspoken truths about how men’s avoidance and manipulation often set the stage for these wars. They trade raw stories and hard-won lessons—naming the difference between boundaries and control, exploring why “keeping it real” with kids can cross into emotional abuse, and spotlighting the cost of outsourcing fatherhood to stepmoms.What emerges is not a call to pick sides, but an invitation to clarity: to name dysfunction for what it is, to refuse loyalty binds, and to remember that kids deserve love and stability over ego and power plays. Healing starts when we stop playing by the tropes and start telling the truth.Resources mentioned• VIP Stepmom — community platform by Naja Hall• I Know I’m Crazy — podcast hosted by Naja Hall• Girl Bye, She’s Not Going Anywhere, Neither Are You — journal by Naja Hall• Stepmom Mastermind Intensive — monthly program led by Naja Hall• Co-parenting apps: TalkingParents, OurFamilyWizardSupport the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Dr. Nadine Macaluso, formerly Belfort is a British-born American psychotherapist, author, internet personality, and former model. She was the second wife of the stockbroker and financial criminal Jordan Belfort, to whom she was married from 1991 to 2005. She is a narcissistic abuse and trauma bond expert.Abuse doesn’t always look like shouting, bruises, or threats. Sometimes it looks like the love story everyone else envies—grand gestures, tenderness, and promises of forever. That’s what makes trauma bonds so dangerous: the cycle of cruelty and kindness that keeps you hooked and questioning yourself. Dr. Nadine knows this cycle all too well. She fell hard for someone the world admired, only to discover she was trapped in an addictive pattern of control, fear, and confusion. Together we unpack why victims don’t “just leave,” how coercive control strips away free will, and why the moments that felt like love were part of the manipulation. Resources mentioned:  Run Like Hell by Dr. Nadine Macaluso (book)Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!After abuse, so many of us wonder if love is even possible again. We tell ourselves we’re too broken, too much, or too “used up". I used to believe that too—until I met Jamie.Together we share what it’s really like to build a relationship after abuse—the fears, the triggers, and the moments that almost felt too good to be true. We talk about unlearning survival mode, discovering what reciprocity actually feels like, and why healing doesn’t have to be complete before love can begin.It’s not a fairytale and it’s not perfect. but it’s real. For anyone who feels like love isn’t possible after everything you’ve been through—I want you to know it is.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!If you've ever been in a relationship with a man who tells you that God hates divorce or weaponizes religion of any kind against you, this episode is for you. And this episode is one that he will not want you to listen to.This week, I sit down with Holly Tidwell, a former pastor who spent 20 years in an abusive marriage while trying to be the perfect submissive Christian wife. Holly shares her powerful story of growing up in Pentecostal culture, attending Liberty University for biblical studies, and becoming a pastor - all while being conditioned to believe that her value was in her virginity and her role was to submit to male authority. After having four children in three years and experiencing the loss of her first daughter, Holly began questioning everything she'd been taught about God, women's roles, and what true love actually looks like. We explore how organized religion creates a breeding ground for abuse by conditioning women to be submissive, childlike, and financially dependent while teaching them that their reward for suffering will come in heaven. Holly explains how scripture gets weaponized - from "wives submit to your husbands" (while conveniently leaving out the part about mutual submission) to being told that women have a "biological duty" to fulfill their husband's sexual needs every 36 hours. We discuss the devastating impact of being taught not to trust your own thoughts and instincts, the financial and spiritual abuse that runs rampant in religious communities, and why domestic violence rates are equally high among Christians and non-Christians. Holly also shares what finally gave her the courage to leave, how she rebuilt her relationship with God outside of organized religion, and what she tells women who feel trapped between their faith and their safety.Resources Mentioned:Brené Brown's "The Gifts of Imperfection": https://a.co/d/f1tNvN0 Connect with Hope With Holly:TikTok, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube: @HopeWithHollyWebsite: https://stan.store/HopeWithHolly Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Cheating doesn't always happen in spite of how much it hurts you. Sometimes it happens because it hurts you - because that's the exact reason they want you to feel that pain, to feel less than. But the psychology behind serial cheating is more complex than we might think, and understanding it can help us make better decisions about our relationships and our own healing.This week, I sit down with Dr. Kate Balestrieri, a licensed psychologist and certified sex therapist, to explore the real motivations behind serial cheating. We dive deep into the concept of "eroticized rage" and how cheaters use infidelity to restore power, seek revenge, transgress social norms, or possess what feels out of reach. Kate explains why the common narrative of "unmet sexual needs" is actually bullshit - men don't have a biological need for sex, and cheating is rarely about the betrayed partner at all. We discuss the difference between compulsive sexual behavior and coercive control, why some people weaponize the "sex addiction" label, and how patriarchal conditioning creates sexual entitlement in relationships. Kate also shares insights on why saying "just leave" isn't always realistic and how to assess whether a relationship involving infidelity is worth trying to repair. Throughout our conversation, we emphasize that no one is entitled to sex from another person, and that healing from betrayal requires individual work - not couples therapy.Resources Mentioned:Dr. Kate Balestrieri's book: "What Happened to My Sex Life? A Sex Therapist's Guide to Reclaiming Lost Desire, Connection and Pleasure": https://a.co/d/7Cj0iCb "Isn't Sex My Right?" webinar featuring Dr. Kate Balestrieri https://strongerthanbefore.podia.com/isn-t-sex-my-right-why-sexual-coercion-is-abuse-webinar-replay Connect with Dr. Kate Balestrieri:Website: https://www.modernintimacy.com/Social Media: @drkatebalestrieriSupport the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!The Five Love Languages seems like such a helpful relationship tool - until it's weaponized by an abusive partner. I brought this popular book into my own abusive relationship hoping it would help us communicate better, only to watch it become a tool for coercion and manipulation against me. This week, I sit down with sexual coercion expert Nat LaJune to unpack the deeply problematic nature of Gary Chapman's bestselling book. We explore how "physical touch" as a love language is almost always weaponized by abusive men, the patriarchal origins of the book itself, and why the entire framework can enable manipulation in relationships. Nat shares insights from her years of content creation on marital coercion, including the common tactics abusers use and why simply saying "just say no" isn't realistic for women in coercive relationships. We discuss the transactional nature that develops when love languages are weaponized, how any of the five categories can become coercive tools, and the importance of focusing on what you give rather than what you receive. Our conversation also touches on the psychology behind men who feel entitled to sex, the role Christianity plays in enabling sexual coercion, and signs that your relationship may involve coercion you haven't recognized yet.Resources Mentioned:"27 Love Languages" piece by Nat LaJuneConnect with Nat LaJune:Find Nat on social media: @alwaysmending and @natlajune https://www.alwaysmending.com/ Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!There's a kind of abuse happening in relationships that doesn't involve broken dishes or broken bones, but it's just as damaging. It's the slow destruction of your sense of self through weaponized incompetence, emotional labor dumping, and the constant message that you should just accept less because "that's how men are."This week, I sit down with Abby Eckel, online content creator known for challenging gender norms and traditional relationship stereotypes. They dive deep into how we're conditioned from childhood to normalize harmful relationship dynamics - from the "boys will be boys" mentality to the expectation that women should just pick up the slack when men refuse to participate in the lives they asked for. Abby shares her insights on the difference between men who genuinely don't understand versus those using weaponized incompetence, why Fair Play doesn't work for most couples, and the reality that you cannot make someone care about your wellbeing. We also discuss the privilege of being able to "just leave" and what women can do when leaving isn't immediately possible.Resources Mentioned:Fair Play by Eva Rodsky"She Divorced Me Because I Left Dishes by the Sink" articleFollow Abby Eckel on InstagramSupport the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Somebody can look you dead in the eye, say everything that you've been dying to hear, and they can still be lying to you. The science behind deception in abusive relationships reveals how manipulators weaponize psychology to systematically break down their victims. This is the podcast they don’t want you listening to.This week, I'm joined by Dr. Abbie Maroño, a behavioral expert with a PhD in psychology who trains the Secret Service and FBI on deception, body language, and influence. We explore the disturbing world of psychological manipulation and how abusers use sophisticated tactics to deceive their victims. Dr. Abbey breaks down the neuroscience behind why we fall for manipulation, explaining how it's not about intelligence but about being human in a world where predators understand psychology. We discuss how abusers systematically strip away your sense of self to gain control, the difference between everyday cognitive dissonance and traumatic cognitive dissonance, and why "love bombing" and intermittent reinforcement create biological addiction. Dr. Abbie reveals how false vulnerability is weaponized to fast-track intimacy and trust, why we rationalize abusive behavior, and the concerning trend of men's dating coaches teaching these same manipulation tactics. She emphasizes that manipulators don't need to be "book smart" - they learn through experience and lack of empathy, exploiting the brain's shortcuts to appear trustworthy. We also dive into her experience training law enforcement and the shocking lack of trauma-informed training in the criminal justice system, highlighting why taking time in relationships is crucial for spotting deception.Connect with Dr. Abbie on Instagram here: @doctorabbieofficial Ger her book, The Upper HandSupport the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!The hardest truth about parental accountability isn't admitting you were wrong-  it's living with the consequences when your own children can't trust you enough to let you back in. This is the podcast your toxic Mom doesn't want you to listen to.This week, I sit down with Crystal Allon, a mother, content creator, and recovering alcoholic who is estranged from two of her adult children. Together, we explore what real accountability looks like when your kids go no contact, not the defensive "I did my best" narrative, but the raw, honest reckoning with how your own unhealed trauma created an emotionally unsafe environment for the people you love most.Crystal shares her journey from active addiction and emotional dysregulation to recognizing the painful truth: her children felt about her the way she felt about her own toxic mother. She breaks down the "playpen analogy" that's helping other estranged parents understand boundaries, why "you can't outwit trauma, you either heal it or pass it down," and the difference between taking responsibility and playing victim.This episode will validate adult children who are tired of being told they're "too sensitive" for protecting themselves, and challenge parents to look beyond their own pain to see the damage they've caused.GuestCrystal Allon, Content Creator and Recovery AdvocateFollow her on TikTok here.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!The voice of your abuser doesn't just sound familiar—it echoes the voices that shaped you long before you ever met them.This week, I sit down with Trauma Therapist, Logan Cooper, to explore the 7 most common childhood environments that unknowingly program us to accept abuse later in life. Together, we break down how emotionally invalidating homes, conditional love, narcissistic parenting, authoritarian control, chaotic households, family secrets, and enmeshment create the perfect storm for trauma bond vulnerability. Logan shares her expertise on how these early experiences teach us to distrust our own reality, chase unavailable love, and mistake chaos for connection. This episode will help you recognize the specific patterns from your past that may be influencing your present relationships and give you the clarity needed to finally break free from toxic cycles.Resources Mentioned:Emotionally Bulletproof Kids: How To Raise Strong & Confident Kids Amongst ChaosGuest: Logan Cooper, Trauma Therapist (@crookedcounselorcooper) https://www.tiktok.com/@crookedcounselorcooper?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc [email protected]  Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!Male fragility isn't weakness - it's emotional inflexibility that becomes a weapon to avoid accountability. When men explode over basic feedback, it's not about your tone or timing.This week, I'm joined by anti-misogyny educator Brent MacLerie to unpack why so many men interpret accountability as an attack. We dive into the "honesty trap" that keeps women walking on eggshells, explore how fragility becomes a control tactic, and discuss the historical roots of male entitlement in relationships. Brent shares his insights on distinguishing between genuine emotional immaturity and weaponized fragility, plus the one key indicator that shows whether a man is capable of real change.Resources Mentioned:Lundy Bancroft’s checklist https://lundybancroft.com/articles/checklist-for-assessing-change-in-men-who-abuse-women/ Connect with Brent MacLerie:YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@ex.patriarch and on TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@expatriarch?lang=en Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!This episode is going to hit different. I'm joined by therapist and domestic violence survivor Aishia Grevenberg to destroy the most dangerous myth keeping women trapped: that your love can heal an abusive man.What You'll Learn:• Why high-functioning, successful women become targets for abusive men• The childhood conditioning that teaches us to "perform" for love• How abusers weaponize therapy and self-improvement narratives to keep you hooked• Why individual therapy doesn't work for abusers (it's not a communication problem - it's a control problem)• The exact moments we both realized we had to leaveKey Takeaways:Abuse is a choice, not a reaction to your behaviorThe desire to "fix" him comes from being conditioned to earn love through complianceSelf-love isn't bath bombs - it's protecting yourself and refusing to tolerate harmNo amount of love can stop someone from choosing to be abusiveThis conversation gets real about the psychological traps that keep us stuck - not just the financial ones. If you've ever thought "if I just love him enough" or "once his stress goes away, he'll change," this episode will shatter those illusions and help you see the truth.Guest:Aishia Grevenberg - Therapist and domestic violence survivor who knows firsthand the duality of advocating against abuse publicly while enduring it privately.Connect with Aisha  Follow her on TikTokSupport the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!This episode is going to challenge everything you've been told about abusive men and why they do what they do. We're ditching the "he's just hurt" narrative and getting real about what's actually happening here.What You'll Learn:• Why therapy can't fix what isn't actually broken (spoiler: it's working exactly as designed)• The difference between trauma responses and entitlement• How seven systems work together to normalize abuse and make you question your reality• Why asking "why won't he change?" is the wrong question entirely• The truth about how you were groomed to abandon yourselfKey Takeaways:His behavior isn't about his childhood trauma - it's about a belief system that says he's entitled to your compliance. Individual and couples therapy won’t make him get better. The systems protecting him aren't broken; they're working perfectly. You weren't overreacting - you were adapting to survive in a culture designed to keep you small. Understanding this isn't about blame; it's about clarity and your freedomThis one's heavy but necessary. If you've ever wondered why he seemed so aware of his impact but kept doing it anyway, or why everyone around you kept making excuses for his behavior, this episode will give you the clarity you've been searching for.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!In this explosive episode, Lisa and Dr. Peter Salerno drop a truth bomb that will change how you see manipulation forever. They dive deep into the uncomfortable reality that abusers manipulate on purpose, exploring whether manipulators need to be "smart" or just strategic, the real reasons behind their behavior, and why being manipulated leaves you feeling so confused and traumatized. This is a must-listen episode that will validate your experiences and help you see the truth clearly.Key Topics Covered:• The shocking truth: Abusers manipulate intentionally, not accidentally• Intelligence vs. strategy - what it really takes to be a manipulator• The psychology behind why abusers choose to manipulate• Why manipulation creates such deep confusion and trauma• How to recognize when you're being deliberately confused• Breaking free from the "maybe they don't know what they're doing" mindsetResources Mentioned:• Trauma Bond Recovery Group Coaching Program• Unbreakable and Irreplaceable: Rebuilding After The Trauma Bond• "The Nature and Nurture of Narcissism" by Dr. Peter Salerno• "Traumatic Cognitive Dissonance" by Dr. Peter SalernoAbout Dr. Peter Salerno:Dr. Peter Salerno is a licensed therapist with a PsyD and MS in Clinical Psychology. He specializes in personality disorders and trauma, with extensive training in these areas. He's the author of two groundbreaking books on narcissism and trauma.Follow him on Instagram Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!In this raw and vulnerable episode, Lisa opens up about the confusing reality of trauma bonds - why they feel so much like love when they're actually destroying us from the inside out.What You'll Learn:• The brain chemistry behind trauma bonds and why they're so addictive• How trauma bonds mimic the feeling of "true love"• Personal stories that reveal the desperation and confusion trauma bonds create• Why your body craves what's hurting you• The difference between genuine love and trauma bondingKey Takeaways:Trauma bonds hijack your brain's reward systemThe push-pull dynamic creates an addiction-like responseUnderstanding the science helps you break free from self-blameYour feelings are valid, but they're not telling you the truth about loveThis episode gets real about the internal battle so many face: "But it feels like love, so how can it be bad for me?" If you've ever felt confused about why you can't let go of someone who hurts you, this episode is for you.Resources Mentioned:The Trauma Bond Recovery Course using my proven Break & Rebuild Method: https://strongerthanbefore.ca/trauma-bond-recovery/Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!When love feels like a battle you're desperate to win, something deeper is happening. In this vulnerable episode, I share my personal story of staying in a 5-year relationship with a professional football player who was cheating with multiple women—while I remained in denial, searching for "proof" I already had.I dive into why we chase people who reject us, why we work overtime to convince someone to love us, and the childhood wounds that program us to equate love with struggle.I'm talking about:The psychological trap that keeps us fighting for relationships that hurt usHow denial becomes a survival mechanismMy own journey through infidelity and the wake-up call I couldn't ignoreThe connection between childhood experiences and our adult relationship patternsHow to recognize when you're chasing love that will never fulfill youIf you've ever found yourself trying harder the more someone pulls away, this episode will help you understand why—and how to break free.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.

Send Lisa a question for her to reply in a future episode!This Is the Podcast They Don’t Want You Listening ToYou weren’t too sensitive. You weren’t overreacting. You were abused — and no one told you what to call it.In this first episode of Real Talk with Lisa Sonni: Relationships Uncensored, I’m naming what they tried to make you doubt. If you’ve ever missed someone who hurt you, wondered why it didn’t feel like freedom when you finally left, or asked yourself, “Why do I still care?” — this is for you.I’m talking about:The emotional chaos of covert abuseWhy it makes you feel like you’re the crazy oneWhat a trauma bond actually feels likeThe moments that cracked me open — and how I finally saw it for what it wasI don’t hold back. And I won’t start now.Support the showThis is the podcast they don't want you listening to.👉 Find me at strongerthanbefore.caBook A Session with LisaFollow on IG: @_stronger_than_before_coachWatch on YouTube: Stronger Than Before Get My Books HereWant to pitch a topic or guest to me? Click here.New episodes drop every Tuesday.Subscribe, share it with someone who needs the truth — and remember:You’re stronger than they ever wanted you to believe.