Soul Sessions

Most leadership advice tells you what good looks like. Almost none of it tells you how to access it when your body is in survival mode.In this Soul Sessions Live, I sit down with Ann De Passos and Kim, two leadership coaches who have spent over fifteen years working with leaders, teams, and organizations through change. We get into:Why frameworks like the Five Dysfunctions and psychological safety stop shortWhat's actually happening in your body during a big transition (layoff, new baby, career pivot, move)The difference between a ventral state and a survival state, and how to tell which one you're inThree practices you can start in the next 45 minutes to make better decisions under uncertaintyWhy urgency feels like productivity, and what it's actually costing youIf you're in the middle of a transition right now, or you're leading people who are, this one is for you.Their experience session is linked in the comments for anyone who wants to feel the difference, not just hear about it.

Crystal Beachum Salako got promoted in tech sales four months after coming back from maternity leave — while breastfeeding a ten-month-old between cold calls. This is how she did it, and what it cost.She spent six months getting rejected from customer success roles before a stranger named Penelope helped her see what she'd been missing: she'd been selling her whole life. Girl Scout cookies. Basketball fundraisers. Recruiting herself to colleges. She just hadn't learned to call it sales.In this episode of Soul Sessions, we sit down with Crystal  to talk about her path from would-be middle school teacher to tech sales — and what happened when she came back from maternity leave to a quota, a newborn, and a laptop she had to operate one-handed. Four months later, she got promoted.

Some people collect stories. Rio has survived them.In 1998, when he was barely old enough to walk, his parents hid him somewhere in their Jakarta apartment, a room, a box, they still can't agree on the detail, while Chinese-Indonesian homes and businesses were being destroyed in some of the worst racial riots in Southeast Asian history. His father, one of only four Chinese students ever admitted to the "MIT of Indonesia," was beaten, bullied, and called slurs his entire childhood. He fought off five men in a single afternoon. And somehow, Rio says, his dad never let a single drop of that hatred live inside him.That lesson shaped everything.At 13, Rio won a one-in-thousands scholarship to Singapore. By his late twenties, he was walking away from three corporate jobs to start a company from scratch. And less than 24 hours before his own wedding, instead of rehearsing vows or greeting family, he was at his co-founder's apartment writing code, a decision he admits he still hadn't fully explained to the woman he was about to marry.Then came Maui. A four-day babymoon. Day two, something felt off. What started as a precautionary ER visit ended with a private medical jet flying below 30,000 feet to Oahu, five days of praying his wife could hold on, and their son Rafael arriving four months early at two pounds, lungs too small to make a single sound.In this conversation, Rio walks through all three chapters, the riots, the wedding-day bet, and the NICU, and what it actually costs to come out of each one softer instead of harder.If you've ever had to be the "stable one" while the world quietly fell apart, this episode will stay with you.

Mitchell Phelps is a father of one (number two is weeks away), Cleveland-based community builder, and the man behind the Daddy's Trollers Social Club. In this episode, Mitchell gets real about the self-imposed pressure men carry into fatherhood, the financial stress they manufacture, the provider identity they inherit from society, and the moment his wife asked him to prove they weren't okay, and he couldn't.He walks us through his 12-week parental leave with his first child, what it actually looked like to be present through the hard parts, and how he navigated loneliness after relocating to a new city with a newborn. A therapist's simple question, "have you been around people?"  changed everything. That led Mitchell to connect with the Daddy's Trollers Social Club, a community for dads that started in Dallas and now has roots in Cleveland.We also get into male postpartum depression (1 in 10 men experience it  and most don't even know), why "daddy bootcamp" is missing the mark, and three practical steps to find your people when you don't know where to start.If you've ever felt the pressure and couldn't explain where it came from, this one's for you.

Sam is a loving husband, father of a three-year-old, and expecting baby number two this July. He's a self proclaim workaholic  who has spent his career in sales and never really knew how to turn it off.So what happens when someone like that gets four months of paternity leave?In this episode of the Soul Sessions Fatherhood Series, Sam shares one of the most vivid descriptions of entering paternity leave I've heard (using a scene from The Matrix to explain the mental shift from constant noise to a blank slate). We talk about how he redirected his high-achiever energy into fatherhood, the question he used to snap himself back to presence, what it really felt like returning to work as a new dad, and why the second leave is going to be a whole different challenge.This one is for every high-performing dad or soon-to-be dad wrestling with the tension between ambition and being present. Sam doesn't have it all figured out  but he shows up honestly, and that's exactly what this series is about.

Evan Coleman went back to work when his son was 21 days old. The second time around, he had 13 weeks — and it changed everything about how he thinks about fatherhood, work, and what companies still get wrong about paternity leave.In this conversation, Evan and Damon get into how to structure your leave strategically, how to build a support system when family isn't nearby, and the mindset shift most new dads miss before baby even arrives.If you're a high-performing dad trying to figure out how to show up fully — at work and at home — this episode is for you.

Most dads want to be more involved and intentional, but the language around fatherhood is often negative or confusing. Paul Sullivan, founder of The Company of Dads, shares the empowering concept of “Lead Dad,” a term that reframes involved fatherhood as uplifting, progressive, and masculine, without stigma. Discover how shifting the narrative can unlock greater engagement at home and in the workplace, helping men and companies thrive together.In this episode, Paul narrates the origin story of “Lead Dad,” inspired by an Atlantic article and a desire to combat the negative stereotypes of involved fathers. He explains how this simple yet powerful phrase is changing perceptions, inspiring thousands of men who are balancing careers and family in a new way. You'll hear stories of NFL players, corporate leaders, and everyday parents redefining masculinity through involvement, presence, and partnership.We break down practical tactics for fostering this shift: from monthly “paper tests” to measure engagement and resentment, to implementing low-lift, high-impact policies like shared calendars, flexible hours, and open conversations that challenge stigma. Paul highlights how companies can create resilient cultures by normalizing flexible parenting, empowering men to show up fully at work and home, and reducing the age-old penalties associated with caregiving.This episode matters because the future of work and family depends on it. As more fathers embrace the role of Lead Dad, the opportunity to build more inclusive, supportive, and productive workplaces grows. By understanding the mental shifts and implementing simple systemic changes, leaders can shape a new normal, where family-first policies drive loyalty, performance, and culture.Perfect for HR professionals, managers, entrepreneurs, and progressive fathers aiming to break stereotypes and foster authentic leadership. If you’re ready to reframe masculinity in your organization or life, this conversation offers clear, actionable steps to start today, and create a legacy of involvement and support that lasts beyond the paycheck.Paul Sullivan is the founder of The Company of Dads, a media platform and community advancing positive fatherhood. His insights are rooted in extensive research, interviews with high-performing dads, and decades of experience changing the narrative around men's roles at home and work.

In this episode, we explore the transformative power of parental leave, especially for leaders and organizations aiming to foster a culture of support and loyalty. Derek Doblin, founder and CEO of Parento, shares his personal journey, industry insights, and actionable strategies to make parental leave a true asset for companies and employees alike.Key Topics Covered:The importance of modeling parental leave as a leader to drive cultural changeHow parental leave supports long-term employee retention and company loyaltyOvercoming common misconceptions about parental leave costs and ROIThe shift from insurance-centric to experience-focused sales approachesCustomization of parental leave policies based on company philosophy, not industry normsThe critical role of leadership mindset in adopting generous parental policiesPractical tips for CEO and HR engagement during parental leaveThe impact of messaging and public example on brand and employee perceptionIndustry trends: blue-collar vs. tech companies' approaches to parental leaveThe future of parental support resources, tools, and digital programsTimestamps:00:00 - Introduction to the episode's focus on leadership and parental leave00:29 - Derek Doblin's background and motivation to start Parento02:11 - The personal significance of paternity leave and bonding03:01 - How Parento supports parents through insurance and resources04:14 - Building a company for a demographic outside the founder’s experience05:18 - The social impact and ROI of paid parental leave from a finance perspective07:11 - Challenges in selling parental leave benefits to HR and finance teams08:38 - How shifting focus to employee experience increases sales success09:36 - Marketing insights: positioning parental leave as a strategic advantage10:30 - The importance of leadership buy-in and company philosophy over industry norms12:13 - Engaging senior leadership and the mindset shift required13:41 - Personal experiences as a CEO taking parental leave15:11 - Conversations with family and support systems during leave16:42 - The significance of intentional bonding and presence as a parent17:53 - Changing perceptions and showcasing leadership by example19:15 - The public commitment and brand reinforcement through parental leave20:48 - Advice for CEOs: planning, communication, and embracing primary caregiving roles21:38 - Rethinking parental leave as a strategic asset in talent management23:00 - Upcoming innovations at Parento and resources for companies24:12 - Final thoughts: the cultural shift towards normalizing involved parenting

In this episode, Kevin Reed (a sales manager) shares his insights on navigating paternity leave, balancing work and fatherhood, and maintaining personal projects during early parenthood. Whether you're a new dad or planning for one, his practical advice and candid reflections offer valuable guidance.This episode offers a practical, honest look at what it takes to balance new fatherhood, work, and personal growth. Kevin’s experiences underscore the importance of community, planning, and self-compassion during this transformative life stage.This episode is brought to you by: https://www.parentoleave.com/Key Topics:Kevin's experience discovering his pregnancy and initial thoughts on paternity leave (0:53 - 2:15)Perceptions of paternity leave in society and workplace norms (2:43 - 3:50)How Kevin planned and structured his paternity leave, including cultural travel considerations (4:05 - 6:44)Strategies for support at work, including Slack channels and team management during parental leave (5:06 - 12:43)Challenges of sleep deprivation and emotional resilience in early fatherhood (13:27 - 15:45)Mantras and advice for navigating the mental and emotional aspects of new parenthood (15:45 - 17:06)Tips for preparing for an upcoming arrival and balancing outside projects with new parent responsibilities (17:06 - 22:13)The importance of ongoing personal projects and maintaining identity outside of parenting (22:13 - 23:52)

In this episode, Kenny Hill shares his personal experience with paternity leave, its impact on his family and career, and practical advice for new fathers and companies alike. Discover how intentional leave can redefine your approach to fatherhood, leadership, and work-life balance.Key TopicsThe significance of paternity leave for new dadsHow to mentally and emotionally prepare for leaveDifferences between PTO and extended parental leaveManaging work responsibilities and trust in your teamStrategic timing and staggering of parental leave with your partnerPersonal growth and reflection during time offHow leave influences leadership and company cultureSupporting partners through postpartum and early parentingTips for companies to support employee parental leaveLong-term benefits of taking time off for family and careerTimestamps00:00 - Introduction: Why paternity leave matters01:18 - Kenny introduces himself as a dad and professional02:16 - The meaning of paternity leave and expectations03:55 - Benefits of taking extended leave versus PTO04:58 - How leave allows for reflection and reevaluation of fatherhood06:13 - Managing work during leave and building trust in your team07:28 - Differences between first-time leave and subsequent times10:38 - How to coordinate staggered parental leave with your partner13:40 - The career impact of taking family leave15:23 - Personal growth and mental clarity during time off16:54 - Advice for first-time dads and managers considering leave18:36 - Embracing the unstructured nature of parenting time20:29 - Company considerations for supporting parental leave22:38 - Supporting your partner and the emotional aspects of fatherhood24:33 - Connecting with Kenny for further advice and support

This episode delves into the complexities of setting and maintaining personal boundaries during the holiday season, especially with family. It explores the challenges and strategies for ensuring self-respect and healthy relationships.

In this episode, Timothy Altman shares his journey from graduating Chico State in December 2023 to landing a tech sales role at a startup within six months. Tim discusses his switch from civil engineering to marketing, the crucial moment of discovering his passion for sales, and the unconventional strategies he used to get hired. He emphasizes the importance of researching companies, cold emailing hiring managers, and standing out in job applications. He also reflects on his first six months in tech sales, the fast-paced and repetitive nature of the job, and the significant role of workplace culture. This episode offers valuable insights for recent graduates and aspiring sales professionals.00:00 Introduction and Welcoming Timothy Altman00:21 Timothy Altman's Background and Journey01:15 Personal Interests and Hobbies02:02 College Highlights and Transition to Workforce03:29 First Six Months in Tech Sales04:48 Choosing a Career Path in Sales06:34 Breaking into Tech Sales: Strategies and Tips13:05 Cold Emailing Tactics for Job Applications19:00 Expectations vs. Reality in Tech Sales20:42 Final Advice and Closing Remarks

In this episode, we dive into the topic of vulnerability in leadership with guest Mark Mangal. Mark shares insights from his career in sales development, highlighting the importance of showing up authentically and the courage it takes to be vulnerable. He reflects on the impact of leaders who have modeled this behavior, and discusses the challenges and benefits of leading with transparency. Mark also offers practical advice for new managers on how to start implementing vulnerability in their teams, and discusses the risks and rewards associated with authentic leadership. This conversation is a must-listen for anyone looking to build stronger, more trust-based work environments.00:00 Introduction and Session Overview00:27 Guest Introduction: Meet Mark01:49 Defining Vulnerability in Leadership03:33 Practical Examples of Vulnerability07:10 Challenges and Benefits of Vulnerability10:30 Advice for Aspiring Leaders15:00 Conclusion and Contact Information

In this conversation, Damon Mclean discusses the preparations and considerations surrounding paternity leave from a non-birthing parent's perspective. He shares insights on decision-making regarding childcare, communication with employers, and the emotional challenges of taking time off work. The conversation emphasizes the importance of planning and support for new parents, particularly fathers, as they navigate this significant life transition.TakeawaysThis is a journey.It's important to think about the first year or two.Childcare options are limited without family nearby.Optimizing time with the child is crucial.Deciding when to tell people is a shared decision.Communication with employers is essential.Guilt about taking time off is common among fathers.Preparation can alleviate fears of being forgotten at work.Having internal champions can help ease the transition.The role of a dad is evolving and needs exploration.Chapters00:00 Preparing for Paternity Leave02:40 Decision-Making in Childcare05:49 Communicating with Employers08:31 Overcoming Guilt and Fear10:22 The Role of a New Dad

In this episode, I reflect on the unexpected lessons and challenges of parenthood that I have encountered as a new father. I discuss my realization about the necessity of patience, understanding that newborns are experiencing everything for the first time and lack the ability to communicate their needs. I emphasize that babies cry because they can't convey what they need clearly, and I talk about the importance of being present and patient with them. This newfound patience and understanding that I can't fix everything immediately are valuable lessons that I believe will aid me in the future. I encourage other new parents to reflect on their biggest learning experiences and share how this journey has helped me grow.00:00 Introduction: Realizing the Obvious00:11 The Challenges of New Parenthood00:52 Understanding Baby's Communication02:01 Developing Patience and Presence03:07 Final Thoughts and Reflections

In this introductory episode of Soul Sessions, Damon shares his personal experiences and insights about paternity leave in America. As a new father with 12 weeks of paid time off from his startup job, he reflects on the importance of bonding with his newborn, the challenges many fathers face in taking paternity leave, and the broader implications for family life and mental health. Damon explores the complexities surrounding paternity leave, including eligibility requirements and societal attitudes, and invites viewers to join him on this journey of discovery and reflection.00:00 Introduction: The Newborn Experience00:38 Exploring Paternity Leave in America01:06 Personal Journey and Privilege01:28 The Reality of Paternity Leave Statistics02:32 Understanding FMLA and Its Limitations03:22 Challenges Fathers Face in Taking Leave04:18 The Benefits of Paternity Leave05:02 Preparing for Paternity Leave05:31 Goals and Reflections06:28 Conclusion and Invitation to Join the Journey

In this episode, Damon interviews Desiree Bailey, an SDR Manager, about her unique leadership approach and background. Desiree shares insights from her upbringing in a Christian household, her transition from crisis mental health to tech, and the importance of living by one's values. Highlights include her daily routines, motivational techniques, the significance of boundaries, and the principles that guide her work. Tune in for an enriching discussion on authentic leadership, mental health, and the dynamic world of tech sales.00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome00:36 Desiree's Background and Journey02:13 A Day in the Life of Desiree03:18 Living by Values in Leadership11:06 Motivating and Supporting the Team14:33 Advice for Aspiring Tech Leaders16:43 Conclusion and Connect with Desiree

In this episode, I cover three key topics: the importance of core values, the overwhelming pace of change in modern life, and the concept of performative vulnerability. I emphasize the necessity of identifying and adhering to core values such as authenticity, courage, and curiosity to stay grounded amidst rapid changes. I also discuss strategies to handle overwhelming change by either increasing one's capacity or eliminating unnecessary burdens. Lastly, I warn against performative vulnerability and underscore the need for genuine vulnerability to build trust in relationships and professional settings.00:00 Introduction and Overview00:26 Understanding Core Values04:03 Coping with the Pace of Change07:42 Performative Vulnerability09:36 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Finding fulfillment beyond the paycheckThe Crossroads Moment Summer opens up about being "good in her role" but knowing there's something more. She's at that pivotal crossroads where comfort meets calling - a place many of us find ourselves when success doesn't equal fulfillment.Beyond the Transaction In tech sales, we sell widgets. But what happens when your soul craves impact? Summer shares her journey of seeking meaning in a transactional world, mentoring formerly incarcerated individuals and working with organizations like Strike.org and Crop to help others break into tech.The Money vs. Meaning Dilemma How do you balance good tech salaries with deeply fulfilling (but often unpaid) work? Summer and our host dive into this real struggle - it's not either/or, it's both/and.Raw Vulnerability From her background with incarceration to turning her life around, Summer doesn't hold back. Her dream job if money wasn't an issue? Running a halfway house through her church.The Wisdom Drop To 12-year-old Summer and 10-years-from-now Summer, the message is the same: "You are enough. You are loved. You can do it."Key TakeawaysDon't put a timetable on figuring out your purposePersonal fulfillment impacts professional performance more than the reverseSometimes taking on "too much" meaningful work is better than not enoughThe biggest regret isn't failing - it's not trying at allYour morning routine matters (Summer's is prayer and quiet time)Quotable Moments"The win for me isn't closing a deal. The win is presenting a solution that solves someone's problem and they walk away happy.""I would regret not trying. You never know unless you do it.""It's okay if you don't have it all figured out. Eventually it will all pan out and play out the way it needs to."

In this soul session, the Damon and Charis, both originally from Jamaica, explore the pressures of living up to parental expectations and the journey of transitioning from traditional fields to new careers. Charis shares her story of studying environmental engineering, moving back to Jamaica, working in events and marketing, and ultimately finding her passion in tech sales in the U.S. during the COVID-19 pandemic. They discuss the cultural and familial expectations that shaped their early life decisions, the struggle of feeling the need to pursue challenging careers to feel accomplished, and the journey toward finding and pursuing personal happiness and fulfillment. The conversation aims to inspire listeners to reflect on their paths and the importance of choosing careers that align with their passions, even if they defy traditional expectations.00:00 Introduction to the Soul Session00:26 Romanticizing the Struggle00:54 Charis's Journey from Jamaica to America01:16 Challenges and Transitions in Career03:35 Expectations and Family Dynamics07:30 Pursuing Happiness Over Tradition10:40 Balancing Work and Personal Fulfillment14:50 Overcoming Guilt and Embracing Ease22:32 Final Thoughts and Reflections

In this episode we dive into the topic compromise and what it takes to achieve personal growth and success. While celebrating achievements, we explores the often-overlooked sacrifices made along the way, whether they are cultural adjustments, personal sacrifices, or identity shifts. 00:00 Introduction: The Hidden Costs of Growth01:38 Personal Journey: From Jamaica to America03:05 Cultural Adaptation and Identity Struggles04:49 Sacrifices and Compromises in Life06:50 The Concept of Identity Foreclosure09:24 Reflecting on Personal Sacrifices11:52 Balancing Growth and Authenticity12:42 Conclusion: Embracing Your True Self

In this episode, Mario McNaughton, Assistant Vice President at Citi, shares his unique journey of moving from Jamaica to Costa Rica and the personal and professional growth that came with it. Mario discusses how stepping out of his comfort zone led to valuable life lessons in adaptability, change management, and continuous improvement. He also delves into the importance of resilience, the impact of AI and automation on work, and the necessity of staying up-to-date in a rapidly evolving world. Tune in for an insightful conversation on how to navigate change and maximize your potential.00:00 Introduction and Guest Overview00:25 Mario's Professional Journey01:02 Adapting to Costa Rica01:40 Facing Challenges and Growth02:27 The Decision to Move06:08 First Impressions and Language Barriers07:55 Embracing Change and Adaptability10:10 Disruption and the Future of Work17:56 Continuous Improvement and Innovation21:14 Final Thoughts and Advice

In this episode, Angel, a recent Princeton University graduate, shares her journey of grappling with the uncertainty and emotional challenges of life after graduation. Once perceived as the responsible and organized one, she now faces the daunting task of figuring out her professional path while dealing with the pressures of seeing her peers secure jobs and opportunities. Angel candidly discusses her struggle to understand herself both personally and professionally, the unexpected importance of family support, and her efforts to balance self-worth with societal expectations. Join Angel as she reflects on her past experiences and seeks to integrate them into her future plans.00:00 Introduction: Life After Princeton00:28 Facing Post-Graduation Realities03:11 Exploring Personal Interests and Passions04:16 Struggles with Self-Identity and Career09:06 Family Support and Realizations13:34 Navigating Uncertainty and Expectations

Navigating Career Transitions and Self-Discovery with Dani VenaIn this episode of Soul Sessions, we engage in a heartfelt conversation with Dharini, who shares her journey from sales and marketing to facing layoffs and finding a balance between creativity and stability. Dharini talks about her experiences moving from Michigan to South Carolina, Chicago, and finally settling in Nashville. She discusses the challenges of working in sales, the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic on her career at a Big Four firm, and the eventual need for a stable and creatively fulfilling job. Through candid reflections on her immigrant parents' influence and the pressures of modern career expectations, Dharini provides insights into navigating career transitions, the importance of community support, and the ongoing journey of self-discovery.00:00 Introduction and Welcome00:31 Meet Dharini: A Journey Through Sales and Marketing01:12 The Move to Nashville and Personal Life02:38 The Challenges and Lessons of Sales04:46 Leaving the Big Four: A Bold Decision06:55 Balancing Creativity and Stability08:55 Navigating Life's Transitions10:02 Embracing Uncertainty and Finding Strength16:12 Final Thoughts and Encouragement

In this session, John Murphy shares his wisdom on navigating life transitions and finding balance. Learn how to tune into your feelings and embrace change!