PODCAST · kids
The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast | Matrescence | Relationship after baby | Motherhood life
by Markella Kaplani - Clinical-Counseling Psychologist | Parenthood & Relationship Coach | Matrescence Expert
The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, hosted by clinical-counseling psychologist and parenthood coach Markella Kaplani, offers a deep exploration of the emotional and psychological challenges of becoming a parent. Diving into topics like matrescence, patrescence, and the loss of identity, this podcast is designed to provide holistic, compassionate insights for those looking to navigate the complex dynamics of parenthood and relationships. With weekly 10-minute episodes focused on personal growth, overcoming parental guilt, and strengthening family bonds, it invites listeners to join a supportive community dedicated to personal and relational fulfillment.
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How to Become MAGNETIC in your Relationship - The One Thing that Guarantees Deeper Connection | Ep. 89
Many couples don’t lose love after becoming parents. They lose exposure. In this episode, we explore why emotional connection can feel thin, even when there’s commitment, shared history, and genuine care. Why you may feel appreciated, needed, even admired… yet still not deeply known. This isn’t another conversation about communication techniques or “trying harder.” It’s about something far more uncomfortable and far more powerful. Drawing from years of therapeutic work, I share a surprising insight from inside the therapy room: people become magnetic not when they are impressive, articulate, or well-regulated, but when they allow themselves to be seen beneath the performance. We unpack the quiet paradox so many of us live with: You crave intimacy, yet you hide the very parts of you that would create it. Not because you’re dishonest, but because at some point, it stopped feeling safe to show up fully. This episode explores how emotional intimacy actually forms, why so many relationships feel emotionally flat after parenthood (or just time…), and how self-protection (not lack of love) slowly erodes closeness. And importantly, we talk about what vulnerability is not: - It’s not oversharing. - It’s not emotional dumping. - It’s not collapsing boundaries. It’s allowing honest parts of you into the room, intentionally, safely, and without armor. If you’ve ever thought: “My partner doesn’t really see me” “I feel alone even though I’m not” “We talk, but it doesn’t land” this episode will help you understand why, and what actually deepens connection. Listen to Episode 66 next Website | Podbean | Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube (video) 👇 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 🤝 Grab resources to support your parenthood and relationship journey 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Mental Load, Resentment & the Fair Play Method with Valerie Recore | Ep. 88
Motherhood today isn’t just exhausting. It’s mentally relentless. In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, I sit down with Valerie Recore, productivity coach for moms and certified Fair Play facilitator, to unpack what’s really happening beneath the surface of modern parenting. This isn’t a conversation about doing more, delegating better, or “just asking for help.” It’s about the mental load, the invisible labor, and the emotional weight mothers carry, often even when partners are willing and well-intentioned. We explore why this generation of mothers feels uniquely overwhelmed, why comparison culture intensifies burnout, and how resentment quietly builds inside relationships when responsibility isn’t truly shared from beginning to end. You’ll hear why asking “What do you need me to do?” can actually make things worse.. and how tools like the Fair Play Method shift couples from fighting each other to working together against the problem. This episode is especially for couples navigating parenthood, identity shifts, and the silent tension that grows when one partner becomes the default manager of life. It’s honest. It’s validating. And it’s deeply practical. Today we explore: Why the mental load isn’t about tasks - it’s about constant vigilance How “help” can still leave mothers feeling alone and resentful What the Fair Play Method actually changes inside relationships Why values, flexibility, and emotional safety matter more than perfection 🎧 If you’ve ever thought “Why am I so tired even when I’m not doing everything?” — this conversation will feel like a deep exhale. 👇 For 1 insight, 1 exclusive tool, and one 3-minute reset, Get on The Sunday Reconnect — ABOUT VALERIE RECORE Valerie Recore is a productivity coach and a Certified Fair Play Method Facilitator. She teaches moms how to get it all done because nobody should feel like they’re failing at motherhood. Whether they work full-time, stay home full-time, or fall somewhere in between, moms call her when they’re ready to stop sacrificing their health and relationships to get it all done. Through their work together, moms start feeling more present with their families and go to bed knowing they focused on their goals. How to Connect with Valerie: website: https://strideproductivity.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strideproductivity/ 10-Minute Task Triage: https://expert-innovator-4217.kit.com/63e9ecbed6 –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Why Holidays Create Resentment in Couples | Parenting, Perfectionism & Partnership | Ep. 87
The holidays are supposed to feel magical, but for many couples, they quietly become a season of exhaustion, tension, and unspoken resentment. Behind the twinkling lights and wrapped gifts often sits one overwhelmed partner (usually a mother) carrying dozens of invisible tasks: remembering, planning, budgeting, anticipating everyone’s needs, and holding the emotional weight of “making it special.” In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we peel back the glitter to talk honestly about the mental load of holiday gift giving - why it feels so heavy, why it’s often gendered, and what it’s doing to your relationship. Drawing from research, real client stories, and lived experience, this conversation isn’t about blaming partners or canceling holidays altogether. It’s about making the invisible visible, understanding how cultural expectations and perfectionism fuel burnout, and learning how couples can share the load more equitably, without losing joy, connection, or meaning. You’ll hear why stress around money and gifts so often turns into resentment, how socialization quietly assigns “holiday management” to mothers, and why many well-intentioned partners genuinely don’t see the cognitive labor involved. Most importantly, you’ll walk away with practical tools to reduce overwhelm, redistribute responsibility, and protect your relationship during one of the most emotionally loaded times of the year. Today we explore: Why holiday gift giving creates a unique mental and emotional burden How invisible labor fuels resentment between partners Practical ways to share the holiday mental load fairly How reducing mental load strengthens intimacy, trust, and presence This episode is for parents who want holidays that feel connected instead of chaotic and relationships that feel like partnerships, not silent scorecards. 👇 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 🤝 Grab resources to support your parenthood and relationship journey 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Rewriting Family Traditions to Reduce Holiday Stress and Make Memories with Your Kids | Ep. 86
Holidays are supposed to bring us closer… but if I’m honest, for a lot of couples, they do the opposite. They quietly surface tension, resentment, and those unspoken power dynamics no one wants to name. Have you ever paused mid-holiday chaos and thought, wait… whose holiday is this really? Whose traditions are being centered? Whose are politely tolerated? And what happens when the family traditions we grew up with no longer fit who we’ve become, especially after kids? That question is what led me to record this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast. In it, I talk about family traditions after kids and why they can suddenly become such a sensitive issue in relationships. Using psychology, family systems work, and real stories from couples I work with, I invite you to rethink holidays not as sacred rules you have to follow, but as living rituals you get to shape together. We talk about holiday traditions conflict, cultural invisibility, and those unexamined “this is how it’s always done” norms that carry a lot more weight than we realize. We also look at mental load during the holidays, and why some traditions feel grounding and comforting, while others quietly leave one partner feeling unseen or pressured. You’ll hear how couples navigate interfaith relationships, intercultural differences, and intergenerational expectations, and how shifting from obligation to intention can genuinely reduce stress and strengthen connection, not just during the holidays, but in the relationship overall. This isn’t about creating a perfect multicultural celebration or doing more. It’s about designing family rituals that feel like home for everyone in the family. In this episode, we explore: Why inherited holiday traditions can create tension after parenthood How cultural dominance and invisibility affect couple relationships The psychology of family rituals, bonding, and stress regulation How co-creating traditions supports belonging, identity, and couple connection If you’re juggling different family backgrounds, feeling pressure to “make everyone happy,” or noticing resentment creep in every holiday season, this episode offers insight and practical, grounded steps, without guilt, perfectionism, or performing the holidays “right.” Think of it as a gentle reset. One that asks: What would it look like if our holidays actually reflected who we are now? 👇 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 🤝 Grab resources to support your parenthood and relationship journey 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Surviving December Together | Reducing Holiday Stress and Protecting Your Relationship | Ep. 85
The holidays promise magic, but for many parents, December brings something very different: pressure, exhaustion, emotional overload, and a quiet sense of “I should be enjoying this more.” In this tender and insightful episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we look at why the season that’s supposed to bring joy so often creates tension between partners, overstimulation for parents, and a mental load that silently grows heavier with every school event, family dinner, and shopping list. Drawing from real stories and psychological research, we explore the gap between holiday expectations and reality, and how it disproportionately affects couples navigating parenting. Many parents carry scripts from childhood, cultural pressure from social media, and the emotional residue of “good family” myths that don’t match lived experience. Add financial pressure, uneven task distribution, and emotional labor, and the holidays can become an annual relationship stress test instead of a bonding moment. But this season doesn’t have to drain you. In this episode, you’ll learn how to set boundaries that actually stick, lower holiday stress by realigning expectations, and create micro-rituals that strengthen connection rather than fragment it. Using evidence-based strategies, we can create a holiday that feels calmer, more authentic, and more aligned with the family you’re building, not the one you think you “should” be recreating. This is an invitation to simplify, soften, and reclaim the heart of the season. A reminder that connection matters far more than perfection. Let’s explore: Why seasonal overwhelm intensifies the mental load for parents The psychology behind holiday expectations vs reality How to reduce relationship stress by communicating early and clearly A deeper emotional insight: how your childhood scripts shape the pressure you feel during December 👇 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 🤝 Grab resources to support your parenthood and relationship journey 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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The New Dad Identity Crisis: Why So Many Men Retreat and How to Reconnect w/ Jason Seeman | Ep. 84
When a baby arrives, two births happen at once: a child AND two brand-new parents. Yet somewhere inside the chaos of sleep deprivation, emotional overload, invisible labor, and identity shifts, couples often look at each other and quietly wonder: What happened to us? In this deeply honest conversation with fatherhood mentor Jason Seeman, we explore the profound but rarely-discussed experience of patrescence, the identity shift men go through when they become fathers. While mothers are often flooded with support, societal narratives, and conversations around matrescence, fathers are handed a baby, a role, and a silent expectation to “figure it out.” And when they struggle? Most don’t say a word. Drawing from Jason’s work supporting fathers, we dive into the emotional terrain beneath the surface: the fatherhood identity shift, the retreat response so many women misinterpret as indifference, and the invisible fatherhood overwhelm that can quietly erode connection. This episode isn’t about blame. It’s about understanding the psychological, emotional, and relational forces at play so couples can begin reconnecting as parents, not as adversaries. You’ll hear why so many relationships after baby fall into cycles of misunderstanding… why couples after kids misread each other’s intentions… and why even a loving, well-meaning partner can feel like they’re drifting away. But most importantly, you’ll learn what brings them back. Jason shares clear, compassionate, practical tools that help both partners feel seen, supported, and respected in the massive parenthood identity changes they’re navigating. This is an episode for mothers who feel alone in the emotional labor. It’s for fathers who carry quiet shame about not “doing it right.” And it’s for couples who know they’re meant to be a team, but feel like they’re speaking two different emotional languages. Today we explore: Why men retreat emotionally during new fatherhood and what they’re really feeling underneath How women can support without over-functioning (and without becoming the “parent” of their partner) Why emotional labor becomes so unbalanced and how to rebalance it A powerful relational insight: the birth of the parent is also the death of the previous self… and both partners must grieve and grow. This episode will challenge you, validate you, and, hopefully, bring you closer. 🎧 Tune in! 👇 For 1 insight, 1 exclusive tool, and one 3-minute reset, Get on The Sunday Reconnect — ABOUT JASON SEEMAN Jason Seeman is a fatherhood mentor and the founder of Raising Fathers, an organization dedicated to supporting men through the emotional, psychological, and relational transition into fatherhood. Through courses, men’s circles, and 1:1 mentoring, Jason helps fathers move from overwhelm and isolation into grounded, connected, emotionally engaged parenting. Drawing on his experience with The Man Cave and the Rites of Passage Institute, Jason brings a rare blend of empathy, depth, and practical wisdom to modern fatherhood, offering men the tools, community, and guidance they often never received. Connect with Jason: 🌐 Website: https://www.raising-fathers.com 📸 Instagram: @raising_fathers 🎧 Podcast / Events / Courses: Available on his website –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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The Mental Load That’s Quietly Breaking Your Relationship - How to Share the Invisible Work | Ep. 83
Parenthood has a way of making the invisible suddenly very, very loud. Especially when you’re the one keeping track of school emails, birthday gifts, doctor’s appointments, holiday planning, emotional stability, and which child currently refuses the “wrong” pair of socks. This week on The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we’re taking you inside the mental load, the relentless cognitive and emotional labor that keeps a household running but often goes unseen, unshared, and deeply unacknowledged. If you’ve ever said, “Why am I the only one who knows all of this?” or felt more like your family’s operations manager than an equal partner, then this episode will land close to home. Together, we unpack the psychological, cultural, and structural forces that shape this inequality. We look at why moms statistically carry up to 79% of household responsibilities, why dads often genuinely believe they’re helping more than they are, and why “helping” is very different from ownership. But this conversation isn’t about blame. It’s about clarity, compassion, and rebuilding teamwork. You’ll hear real, anonymized client stories, and we walk through practical strategies, from the Fair Play Method to weekly check-ins, emotional labor sharing, and communication shifts, that help couples rebalance the load and reconnect as partners, not adversaries. Whether you’re drowning in the invisible work or realizing you’ve been unintentionally handing it to your partner, this episode offers both insight and relief: a way forward that honors everyone involved. 👇 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 🤝 Grab resources to support your parenthood and relationship journey 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Trad-Wife Myth Debunked - Real Motherhood vs the Tradwife Movement | Trad Wife Trend | Ep. 82
The “tradwife” trend is everywhere - soft dresses, sourdough starters, spotless kitchens, angelic lighting. It’s presented as serenity, simplicity, and the antidote to overwhelm. But beneath the aesthetic lies a deeper story about real motherhood, pressure, identity, and what women are actually yearning for. In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we dismantle the trad-wife aesthetic with compassion and context, not judgment. Because this trend isn’t just about homemaking. It’s emerging from the exhaustion, contradictory expectations, and emotional labor that mothers carry today. Many women tell me they’re torn between two impossible standards: “Work and prove your worth” vs. “Stay home and prove your worth.” Both come with shame. Both come with mom guilt. Both shrink maternal identity into a performance. And so the trad wife trend promises something tempting: Rest. Clarity. Being cherished. A simpler life. But the truth is more complex…and much more human. Together, we explore the psychology behind why this aesthetic is so appealing in a time of rising childcare costs, rigid workplaces, and unequal mental load at home. We look at the risks of financial dependence, the loss of autonomy, and the emotional isolation that “traditional roles” can create for both mothers and fathers. We also uplift the legitimate desires behind the fantasy: slowness, intentional rituals, emotional safety, and shared responsibility. This episode is both grounding and liberating; an invitation to honor motherhood without romanticizing systems that historically harmed women, and without dismissing the beauty of nurturing, homemaking, or soft living. It’s about reclaiming choice, partnership, and the dignity of being multidimensional humans raising multidimensional children. Whether you’re a stay-at-home mother, a working mom, or a father wanting to understand these dynamics better, this conversation is designed to leave you feeling seen, strengthened, and supported. Today we explore: Why the trad wife trend is surging (and what women are actually craving beneath the aesthetic) How modern motherhood became a double-bind of contradictory expectations The mental load + emotional labor gap that quietly shapes family life A compassionate path forward based on choice, partnership, autonomy, and respect 👇 Grab these resources I mentioned 👉 For Dads: Reconnection Roadmap 👉 The Sunday Reconnect 👉 ALL my [free] resources –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Postpartum Depression in Men - Symptoms, Causes, & Steps to Healing PPD in Men | Ep. 81
When was the last time you truly asked a new dad how he’s doing? Not how the baby sleeps, not how mom is coping, but how he really feels. Because while we often picture fathers as the steady anchor while mothers weather the storm, research shows that paternal postpartum depression, also known as postnatal depression in dads, is far more common than we think. In fact, 1 in 10 men experience what’s sometimes called male postpartum depression or PPD in men, a reality that still hides behind workaholism, irritability, silence, or anger. Can men get postpartum depression? The answer is YES. They can and they do. This episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast lifts the silence on that truth, revealing the emotional, biological, and relational layers that make fatherhood depression one of the most misunderstood aspects of parenthood. Through two powerful stories of real fathers, we explore what postpartum depression in men looks like beyond stereotypes, and how its symptoms often go unnoticed. It doesn’t always appear as sadness; sometimes it’s snapping at small things, zoning out, or working until midnight. Sometimes it’s feeling like you’re failing at the one role you’ve always wanted to get right, being a good dad. Together we discuss the hidden factors that contribute to paternal postpartum depression and fatherhood anxiety, from hormonal changes and identity loss to sleep deprivation and inherited emotional silence. You’ll discover how these forces create a perfect storm: biological shifts that drain motivation, cultural scripts that glorify stoicism, and emotional contagion when both partners are struggling in silence. This isn’t about comparing pain between mothers and fathers. It’s about completing the picture, because when we include fathers in the conversation, the entire family begins to heal. Supporting dads doesn’t take empathy away from mothers; it multiplies it. Today we explore: Why paternal postpartum depression often hides behind anger, overworking, or withdrawal. How hormonal changes, identity loss, and sleep deprivation combine to create fatherhood depression. What partners can do to rebuild connection and share the mental load when one parent struggles. The deeper truth: Supporting fathers isn’t dividing empathy. It’s multiplying it for everyone. When fathers’ mental health is supported, children thrive, couples reconnect, and society begins to redefine what strength truly means. You’ll walk away from this episode knowing how to recognize the signs, open up a conversation, and start the healing process, together. If you or someone you love is navigating early parenthood, this conversation is an invitation to see beyond the surface - to see the man behind the mask. Because postnatal depression in men isn’t weakness; it’s the body and mind’s way of saying, “I need care too.” 👇 Download these resources I mentioned 👉 Reconnect Roadmap for Men 👉 The Sunday Reconnect –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Postpartum Mental Health - How to Cope With Postpartum Anxiety, Depression & Mom Rage | Ep. 80
Becoming a parent changes everything… your body, your sleep, your relationship, your identity. But for many mothers, that transformation also brings something much heavier: an invisible weight that few dare to name. In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we dive deep into the emotional reality of postpartum mental health, from depression and anxiety to rage, intrusive thoughts, and the quiet guilt that shadows new motherhood. This isn’t another “baby blues” conversation. It’s a compassionate, science-backed exploration of what really happens when hormones crash, sleep disappears, and expectations collide with human limits. Through powerful stories and practical tools, I invite you to replace shame with understanding and to see these struggles not as weakness, but as the body and mind’s way of asking for care. Whether you’re a mother, partner, or simply someone who wants to understand what new parents truly go through, this episode will help you see that healing after birth is not about bouncing back, it’s about moving forward. Today we explore: The difference between baby blues and clinical postpartum depression or anxiety How hormones, identity loss, and invisible labor collide to create distress What postpartum rage really means and how to manage it without shame How couples can rebuild connection and emotional safety after birth This episode is your gentle reminder that survival is love in action and that every parent deserves to feel supported, not judged. 👇 Download these resources I mentioned 👉 Matrescence Mini-Course [Free] 👉 The Sunday Reconnect –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Parenthood, Perfectionism & the Nervous System | Rewiring the Mind for Emotional Healing w/ Dr Moreland | Ep. 79
What if the version of you that’s struggling right now, with perfectionism, exhaustion, or that endless loop of “I should be better,” isn’t broken, but wired for survival? In this week’s episode, I sit down with Dr. Ashleigh Moreland, neuroscientist and founder of the Re-Mind Institute, for a conversation that might just change how you see yourself, your mind, and even your parenting. Together, they explore what it truly means to unbecome who you had to be in order to survive, and why real healing often looks less like “self-improvement” and more like returning to who you were before you learned to hide your feelings. Dr. Moreland unpacks the difference between the brain and the mind, explaining why understanding this distinction changes how we experience emotion, addiction, burnout, and even our relationships. Through her work on neuroplasticity, she shows how every human being can rewire their nervous system, moving from a pattern of protection to one of connection. This episode will speak to anyone who’s ever felt “stuck” in old reactions: the parents who lose patience, the partners who feel disconnected, the perfectionists who can’t rest. It’s not about fixing yourself. It’s about finally feeling safe enough to stop performing. Today we explore: The difference between the brain and the mind — and why it matters. How your nervous system wiring affects your emotions, relationships, and sense of self. Why unbecoming (who your mask is) can be more powerful than becoming (your ideal self). How to create emotional safety in your family so your kids inherit healing, not trauma. Dr. Moreland and I bring warmth, humor, and clarity to the science of human transformation as a reminder that change is not about effort, but about safety. 🎧 Tune in to discover how understanding your wiring can help you stop fighting yourself and start leading with compassion. 👇 For 1 insight, 1 exclusive tool, & one 3-minute reset, Get on The Sunday Reconnect — ABOUT DR. MORELAND Dr Ashleigh Moreland is a neurophysiologist, therapist, and founder of Re-MIND Institute. She specialises in trauma-aware, nervous-system-informed approaches to parenting, relationships, and personal growth. Drawing on her expertise in neuroscience and human behaviour, Ash helps people break cycles of stress and disconnection to create safer, more connected relationships at home and beyond. See how you can get in touch and her work HERE. –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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When Love Turns Into Obligation | Healing Resentment in Marriage After Kids | Ep. 78
Have you and your partner ever argued about something trivial, a birthday cake, a chore, or a tone of voice, and realized it was really about something deeper? In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, I unpack how love, once effortless, can begin to feel like an obligation when unspoken fears and fatigue take over. This isn’t an episode about blame. It’s about understanding. Why resentment builds even in loving relationships. Why partners often feel unseen despite their effort. And how to move from scorekeeping to soulkeeping …rebuilding connection not through equality, but empathy. We look at the psychology behind resentment, the gendered conditioning that fuels emotional misfires, and the small yet profound acts that reignite warmth in long-term love. You’ll learn why overgiving turns into quiet bitterness, why “help” is never the same as “partnership,” and why even care, when performed out of fear, can feel like rejection. Whether you’re the partner who over-functions or the one who freezes, this conversation will help you decode the hidden messages behind your conflicts, and guide you toward a relationship that feels emotionally generous again. In a gist we talk about: Why resentment isn’t proof your relationship is broken. In fact, it’s proof you’ve both been trying hard in mismatched ways. 2. How gender conditioning creates invisible emotional roles that breed fatigue. 3. Practical tools to move from obligation to choice — including weekly check-ins and reframing “help” into true partnership. 4. The emotional truth behind the phrase “I shouldn’t have to ask,” and what it reveals about unseen labor, love, and longing. You’ll walk away not just with insights but with heart-level clarity: love isn’t about doing more… it’s about doing from truth. Because when you stop trying to earn love, you finally start to feel it again. 👇 Download these resources I mentioned 👉 7-Day Reconnect Challenge 👉 The Sunday Reconnect –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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When Parenthood Turns Partnership into Pressure - Why Emotional Labor Divides Us (& How to Heal Together) | Ep. 77
Do you wonder if you’ve fallen out of love with your partner? Is this more intense after kids? When love starts to feel like labor, and home feels more like a to-do list than a refuge, it’s not because you’ve fallen out of love. It’s because you’re both carrying A LOT - more than anyone can see. In this episode we break down the silent struggles of parenthood: the mental load, emotional labor, and invisible pressures that quietly reshape relationships after children enter the picture. We’ll look at how mothers often carry emotional vigilance born from generations of conditioning, and how fathers quietly bear expectations of strength, provision, and stoicism. Both end up exhausted, one managing life’s invisible chaos, the other crushed under invisible pressure. Together we discuss how these unseen weights lead to disconnection and resentment. By the end of the episode, you walk away with 5 small, but powerful recalibrations that help couples rebuild empathy, teamwork, and appreciation. Because partnership isn’t about perfect balance - it’s about shared gravity. Today we explore: 👉 The unseen mental load that drains mothers and fathers differently. 👉 How inherited family scripts shape emotional labor. 👉 Five daily practices to rebalance love and responsibility. 👉 Why appreciation, empathy, and rest are radical acts of repair. Find and Download all my [Free] resources 👉 HERE –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Stay-at-Home-Mom vs Working Mom - Why We Feel Judged - Mom Guilt Explained | Ep. 76
Have you ever found yourself explaining your parenting choices a little too much? …Not because someone attacked them, but because something inside you felt the need to justify? In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we explore what’s really happening beneath those subtle moments of parental defensiveness … the guilt, the identity shifts, and the deep desire to feel like we’re doing enough. Through a real-life story of two moms at a school gate - one working full-time, one a stay-at-home-mom (SHAM) - we unravel how easily conversations about “what’s best for the kids” become reflections of our own insecurities. I reveal how matrescence (the psychological transition to motherhood) reshapes identity and why every comment about parenting choices can feel personal. But more importantly, I guide you through 3 steps to soften the sting of comparison. Because when we can meet ourselves with kindness, other people’s choices stop feeling like threats. Today we explore: 👉 Why we defend our parenting choices and what we’re really trying to prove. 👉 The link between mom guilt, identity shifts, and societal pressure. 👉 Three practical tools to stop feeling judged and start feeling secure. 👉 How self-compassion transforms comparison into connection. If you’ve ever felt that quiet pit in your stomach after hearing how another parent does things differently, this episode will feel like a deep exhale. There is no perfect way to parent. There's only your way, done with presence and compassion. 👇👇👇 Download these resources I mentioned for [Free] 👉 Matrescence Video Series 👉 Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide 👉 Self-Connect Calendar –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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When Parenthood Changes Us | How Couples Navigate Identity, Relationship & Growth | Ep. 75
Parenthood doesn’t just change your schedule. It shifts who you believe you are. In this episode, we dive into those quiet, sometimes painful cracks in identity that open once kids arrive: the lost “you”, the unseen tensions in your relationship, the unmet expectations, and the longing to feel whole again. We explore how couples can hold space for one another, learn tools to rebuild intimate connection, and begin to reclaim identity without resentment, guilt, or disconnection. This isn’t about returning to “pre-kids you.” It’s about integrating growth, grief, love, and change so your relationship and your sense of self can thrive. Today, we explore: How parenthood transforms your self-image, your role expectations & what you didn’t see coming. Communication tools for couples: naming patterns, navigating the unspoken, co-regulation in moments of mismatch. Practical micro-movements you can begin at home to restore connection & feel seen again. The emotional insight: you don’t need to “fix” everything. Sometimes, being witnessed, naming the change, and leaning into vulnerability is the bridge to deeper intimacy. If you’re feeling like you’ve lost bits of who you were, or if the person you’re in relationship with is changing in ways you didn’t expect, this episode is for you. Listen in, let the discomfort teach you, and find space to rebuild together. 👇👇👇 Download the [free] Reconnection Roadmap [for him] –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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When Fathers Feel Irrelevant | Understanding Patrescence and Relationship Disconnect | Ep. 74
Download the [free] Reconnection Roadmap [for him] !! Fatherhood is more than showing up at bedtime or paying the bills. Yet too often, dads enter parenthood without the same acknowledged transformation that mothers undergo. This episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast pulls back the curtain on patrescence - the emotional, psychological, and relational journey of becoming a father. While society expects women to evolve when they become mothers, men are still told to “provide, not process.” The result? Emotional disconnect, intimacy breakdowns, and couples who love each other but feel worlds apart. In this episode, we dive deep into what happens when fathers aren’t invited into their own becoming, and why that gap leaves both partners lonely. With warmth, honesty, and practical tools, we unpack the barriers that hold men back from fully stepping into fatherhood, from cultural conditioning to fear of failure. More importantly, you walk away with a roadmap for reconnection that doesn’t blame men, but instead calls them into deeper presence, courage, and love. This isn’t about fixing your partner. It’s about understanding the unseen layers of patrescence and reclaiming connection — for yourself, your relationship, and your children. Today we explore: 1. What patrescence is and why it’s rarely talked about. 2. How men experience fatherhood differently (and why it often goes unnamed). 3. The barriers that stop dads from fully shifting. 4. Practical micro-movements couples can use to rebuild closeness. Moms, if you’ve ever wondered why your partner seems unchanged while you feel completely transformed, or if you’re a dad who feels “not enough” no matter what you do, this conversation will meet you right where you are. 👉 Don’t miss the free resource mentioned in the episode: The Reconnection Roadmap, a simple 7-step guide to help couples rediscover admiration and affection without needing a heavy emotional talk. --- Episode Transcript HERE. –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Download the [free] Reconnection Roadmap [for him] -- Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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3 Practical Steps to Heal Emotional Disconnection in Marriage After Children | Ep. 73
Get the [free] Reconnection Roadmap [for him] that I referred to!! Have you ever looked over at your partner in bed and thought, we’re right next to each other… but it feels like we’re living on different planets? If so, you’re not alone. This episode is all about what psychologists call emotional drift: that quiet, subtle distance that creeps into so many relationships after kids arrive. Today, we unpack one of the most common questions couples ask: “Why do couples feel like roommates after kids?” Because let’s be honest: Parenting together can sometimes feel more like project management than partnership. You share a home, a schedule, maybe even a Google calendar… and yet, there’s this ache of where did we go? In this conversation, I’ll walk you through: What emotional drift in marriage actually is and why it’s not the same as resentment or incompatibility. The hidden reasons why marriage after kids struggles even when the love is still there. Why moms often feel invisible carrying the mental load, and why dads often feel they’re “still not enough” no matter what they do. What research from The Gottman Institute shows about bids for connection and why missing them slowly erodes intimacy. Simple, science-backed tools for how to reconnect with your partner after having children without forcing awkward conversations or waiting for “date night.” You’ll learn practical ways to shift the emotional temperature in your home through what I call micro-moments - small, doable gestures that rebuild safety and closeness over time. Think six-second hugs, honest one-liners like “I miss us”, or learning to regulate your body before you try to relate with your partner. If you’ve been Googling things like feeling alone in my marriage after kids, emotional distance in marriage, or how to save your relationship after children, this episode will meet you right where you are. Because the truth is: the drift isn’t proof you’ve fallen out of love. It’s a signal that your nervous systems are overloaded, your emotional labor is uneven, and your relationship needs small acts of repair, not blame. And here’s the most important part: your kids are watching. They’re learning what love looks like by seeing how you and your partner reach for each other, or drift apart. Repairing emotional distance isn’t just about saving your marriage. It’s about giving your children a model of resilience, tenderness, and connection they’ll carry into their own lives. So if you’ve been feeling like roommates in the same bed, press play on this episode. You’ll walk away with compassion for yourself, insight into your partner, and clear steps for creating connection again. And if you want to go deeper, don’t forget to grab my free Reconnection Roadmap — seven simple steps to reawaken admiration and intimacy without long talks or therapy jargon. Because love after parenthood is a whole new game… and with the right tools, you can win it together. –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — The [free] Reconnection Roadmap [for him] that I referred to — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Work with Me 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Family Culture in a Neurodivergent Home | Intentional Parenting with ADHD or Autism | with Dr. Leonaura Rhodes | Ep. 72
In this deeply moving and highly intentional episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we explore what happens when parenthood collides with identity, neurodiversity, and the gentle yet powerful art of designing your life with purpose. I sit down with Dr. Leonaura Rhodes, whose unique journey as a physician, neurofeedback therapist, life coach, and parenthood strategist moves beyond the clichés to the core questions: How do we grieve the life we thought we’d have? How do we rebuild a family culture that reflects both challenge and deep love? Dr. Rhodes brings clarity, heart, and practical wisdom. You'll learn: Why living on autopilot is the opposite of thriving. How even unexpected diagnoses can open doors to deeper intentionality. Ways to reshape your identity as a parent without losing yourself—or your connection as a couple. This episode is for you if you’re in the heart of confusion or awaiting clarity—parents navigating an identity shift, couples trying to tether their bond while juggling new roles, or anyone wondering, Can I design a life that feels real and true? Through stories, laughter, and guiding strategies, Dr. Rhodes and I dig into the messy, beautiful process of conscious family design. ----- MORE ABOUT DR. LEONAURA RHODES Dr. Leonaura Rhodes is a physician from UK (Family medicine, public health and developmental pediatrics). She moved to USA 16 years ago and became a neurofeedback therapist and a life coach for parents and high achieving professionals. In 2015 she published "Beyond Soccer Mom: Strategies for a fabulous balanced life" - a book to help parents intentionally design their life so that they can thrive while they raise children. Dr. Rhodes is also a podcast host, corporate trainer and teacher for a large wellness platform. Website: https://www.drleonaurarhodes.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/leonaurarhodes/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drleonaurarhodes Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/leonaurarhodes/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC2IIJj_hnHZJO8BwcKPqInQ — 🎁 GET THE CALM PARENT, CALM CHILD GUIDE! https://www.markellakaplani.com/calmparentcalmchild 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zrYvxzn2CBbhaZauMeG9LYhr7uhiw4prmQZPShBgQHA/edit?usp=sharing — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources (https://www.markellakaplani.com/resources) 👉 Link to my Newsletter (https://markellakaplani.com/newsletter) 👉 Work with Me (https://markellakaplani.com/) 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! https://podcasts.apple.com/gr/podcast/the-parenthood-and-relationship-podcast/id1739098480 Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Holding the Vision Alone? | How to Build Family Culture Without Parent Burnout | Ep. 71
Have you ever felt like the invisible leader in your home? Like you’re the one carrying the emotional weight, asking the big questions, and trying to shape a family culture while your partner seems to coast? You’re not alone. In this week’s episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we explore the reality of being the “vision bearer,” the parent who notices the gaps, feels the tension, and holds the dream of what family life could be. While it’s a powerful role, it can also lead to exhaustion, resentment, and loneliness if carried alone. Through real-life examples and practical strategies, I guide you through three ways to lead without burning out. This episode is about reclaiming the energy to lead intentionally while also protecting your boundaries and emotional well-being. It’s for parents who long to build a loving, resilient family culture, but need to know they don’t have to do it all. Today we explore: Why every family has a “vision bearer” and the hidden costs of carrying it alone How to transform control into genuine invitations for your partner to join you The power of small microculture moments that quietly shape family identity How to protect yourself from burnout and resentment while leading with love Your family culture doesn’t have to collapse under pressure. With the right tools and mindset, you can create something lasting, human, and deeply connected, without losing yourself in the process. 🎁 GET THE CALM PARENT, CALM CHILD GUIDE! 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Work with Me 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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3 Step Framework to Building Family Values | Rewrite Parental Scripts | Intentional Parenting | Ep. 70
GET THE WORKSHEET HERE In today’s episode, we explore a deceptively simple, but deeply messy, question: Whose values are you parenting from? It’s a gentle, courageous invitation to uncover the scripts we’ve inherited; values absorbed from our families, communities, even the culture at large, and ask: Are these values yours… or just familiar? Join me as we unravel what “values” really mean: not slogans, but the guiding principles that show up when you’re tired or triggered. We'll look at where those values come from, how they can misalign with the family you actually want, and how to begin choosing values that reflect your own vision, not just the one you inherited. You'll hear: Why many of us parent by default, using values we never consciously chose A simple but powerful framework: Keep • Rewrite • Release, used to redefine what matters most Real-life stories of couples navigating differences in meaning and merging into a shared, intentional value system This isn’t about blame or perfection. It’s about awareness, courage, and alignment. Because values like presence, kindness, rest, or respect deserve a lived definition that you and your partner both own. This episode’s breakdown: 1. How inherited values shape your parenting without you realizing it 2. The three-column framework to keep, rewrite, or release values 3. What happens when you and your partner define the same words differently 4. The emotional power of choosing values that align with the family you truly want Take this episode as your mirror: a chance to pause, get curious, and reclaim the values that light you up. You don’t need a manifesto. You need clarity and courage. 🎁 GET THE CALM PARENT, CALM CHILD GUIDE! 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Work with Me 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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The 3 Rs of Family Culture | How Rituals, Rhythms, & Roles Shape Connection & Promote Intentional Parenting | Ep. 69
Here’s the truth: You’re shaping your family culture every single day — not through grand gestures, but in the tiny, repeated choices that give your home its emotional tone. What you say when someone’s upset. How you transition between activities. Where your attention lands. That’s all culture. In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we break down the Three Rs of shaping an intentional family life: Rituals, Rhythms, and Roles. These are the invisible building blocks that can transform a home from reactive and scattered… to grounded, connected, and harmonious. Rituals are the glue of connection — small, intentional moments that say this matters. Rhythms are the nervous system’s love language — predictable flows that help every member of the family exhale. Roles are the unspoken scripts we act out — often inherited, sometimes limiting, and always worth re-examining. If your days feel chaotic, your routines inconsistent, or your relationships stuck in the same patterns, this episode will give you tools to pause, notice, and choose differently. We’ll explore how to gently reclaim rituals, anchor rhythms, and loosen roles so your family culture reflects what you actually value — not just what you’ve inherited. Today we explore: How to identify and create meaningful family rituals. Why rhythm brings calm to children (and adults) without turning into rigid schedules. How to spot inherited family roles — and update the script. The emotional impact of conscious family culture on connection and security. This isn’t about perfection — it’s about awareness and one small change at a time. Because the way you live today becomes the emotional home your children will remember tomorrow. -- 🎁 GET THE CALM PARENT, CALM CHILD GUIDE! 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Work with Me 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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What is Family Culture, Why Is it Vital, and How to Establish it Intentionally | Ep. 68
Many parents don’t even realize they already live within a culture - an emotional ecosystem fueled by inherited patterns, repeating phrases, rituals (or the lack thereof), and relational rhythms. You might feel like your family is stuck on autopilot, responding to tantrums or tensions without curiosity or clarity. You might rely on bribes, punishment, or reactive conflict, with no sense of intentional design. But here’s the good news: shifting your family culture doesn’t require a revolution. It starts with a pause… a breath between the stimulus and your response. Today, we explore how intentional parenting can grow from the soil of small rituals, creating safety, rhythm, and deeper connection. You’ll learn: - What family culture really is and why it lives in the “air between you.” - How most family culture is unconsciously inherited and ways to consciously choose what to keep, rewrite, or release. - Signs your home might be on autopilot and how that cycle silently shapes both children and parents. - How tiny, sacred patterns (think bedtime phrases or Sunday check-ins) form the anchors of a thriving emotional ecosystem. Stay tuned till the end for the Three‑Bucket Reflection: a tool to map what you keep, rewrite, and release. If you’ve ever wondered how to parent with intention instead of reaction, or how to build a home that holds space for curiosity, kindness, rest, and emotional safety, this episode calls to you. 🎁 GET THE CALM PARENT, CALM CHILD GUIDE! 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Work with Me 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Overstimulation in Parenthood: Strategies for Better Connection with Sara Sandland | Ep. 67
Is overstimulation quietly unraveling your relationship? In this vulnerable and illuminating conversation with certified Health & Wellness Coach Sara Sandland, we peel back the layers of what’s really happening when moms feel “touched out,” irritable, or emotionally distant from their partners - and why it’s not a personality flaw, but a physiological reality with deep relational consequences. Sara and I unpack: The daily signs of sensory and emotional overload that most moms dismiss Why postpartum depletion can last for years The ripple effect of overstimulation on physical intimacy and emotional closeness Why couples often want the same thing — to feel connected again — but keep missing each other And what proactive conversations and micro-changes can rekindle that lost bond. This episode will leave you feeling seen, empowered, and supported — whether you’re the parent who feels overwhelmed or the partner who feels left behind. 💌 SIGN UP: This week’s loveletter includes 1 insight, 1 exclusive tool, as well as 1 three-minute reset to help you track small emotional wins. Get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. — Who is Sara Sandland? Sara Sandland is a Certified Health & Wellness Coach who specializes in maternal well-being and the motherhood experience. As the Founder & Owner of Notably Well, Sara helps moms improve their energy, overstimulation, overwhelm, fulfillment, relationships, and more through feasible and sustainable adjustments in their lifestyle, behaviors, and mindset so they can feel and function like themselves again and experience the very best of motherhood. As a mom herself, she understands how postpartum shifts in the body’s functioning, coupled with the life changes that come with motherhood can affect maternal health and wellness in many ways. She also understands how difficult it can be for moms to find the time and energy to navigate the journey involved in addressing these impacts. She is passionate about supporting moms in identifying and addressing their roadblocks and empowering them to take their health and wellness journey into their own hands so they can thrive in motherhood. Free Guide: The Overstimulated Mom's 3-Step Guide to Reclaim Resilience in Moments of Overwhelm (https://preview.mailerlite.io/preview/1035554/sites/149340687669658892/Sp0CeU) Free Discovery Call with Sara (https://my.practicebetter.io/#/67170c18c96165ff776acfc6/bookings?s=67171180b5183f8a5001aff6&step=date) Website: www.notablywell.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/notablywell Facebook: www.facebook.com/notablywell --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉 GET THE FREE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Reactive vs Relational Communication | Why Your Partner Still Doesn’t Get You | Marriage after Baby | Ep. 66
GET THE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! Ever walked away from a heartfelt conversation feeling more alone than before you spoke? You thought you said it right. You were calm. You had a point. But somehow, your partner shut down, got defensive, or brought up the dishwasher from last week. If that sounds familiar, this episode is for you. In this week’s episode, we’re diving into the often-missed difference between reactive and relational communication. It's not about perfect phrasing. It's about the place inside of you that you’re speaking from and whether that place is trying to connect… or trying to protect. I share a powerful story from my couples practice and breaks down my Trigger to Truth model, a four-step process that helps you shift out of automatic reactions and into meaningful connection. Whether you’re the one who gets quiet or the one who spirals into logic, this conversation will give you the tools to spot your own protective strategies and choose a more authentic, present path forward; one that leads to intimacy, not just talking. This episode is especially relevant for parents navigating the mental load, emotional fatigue, and shifting identities post-baby. When communication falters, it’s rarely about what was said and more often about what was left unhealed. 💡 Today we explore: Why “being calm” isn’t enough in conflict The three voices of the protector: blame, withdrawal, and over-rationalizing What relational communication looks, sounds, and feels like The powerful reframe that turns tension into closeness This is the third episode in the July communication series. If you missed episodes 64 and episode 65, go back for a full foundation. 🎁 GET THE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! https://podcasts.apple.com/gr/podcast/the-parenthood-and-relationship-podcast/id1739098480 Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Transform Couple Fighting Styles Into Healthy Conflict Resolution | Marriage After Kids | Ep. 65
What if the fights that feel like they're tearing you apart could actually bring you closer together? In this transformative episode, we're diving deep into the hidden world of couple fighting styles and healthy conflict resolution that can revolutionize your relationship. If you're a parent feeling caught in endless cycles of marriage conflict patterns, this episode is your roadmap to freedom. We explore why happy couples don't avoid conflict... they transform it! From the pursuer-withdrawer dance to the protective parts that hijack our conversations, you'll discover the relationship communication skills that actually work when emotions run high. Through real case studies and practical tools, we unpack how your childhood experiences shape your adult couple therapy techniques and why understanding your nervous system responses is crucial for relationship repair techniques. Whether you're dealing with parenting relationship challenges or struggling to maintain intimacy in your marriage after kids, this episode offers hope and actionable strategies. You'll learn the powerful "Conflict Reset" method that helps you pause destructive patterns and choose connection over being right. We explore how emotional regulation couples can master together, turning conflict from a threat into a doorway for deeper understanding. Today we discuss: 🔍 The four main conflict styles and how to identify yours 💬 Why your nervous system hijacks arguments and how to reclaim control 🧠 The Conflict Reset technique that transforms fights into connection opportunities ❤️ How to treat conflict as a mirror that reveals unmet needs and hidden fears Perfect for couples navigating the complexities of parenthood, this episode bridges psychological insight with practical tools you can use tonight. --- GET THE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. — 👉 Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! https://podcasts.apple.com/gr/podcast/the-parenthood-and-relationship-podcast/id1739098480 Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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How to Fix Miscommunication | Parenting Stress, Emotional Triggers & Relationship Repair | Ep. 64
[GET THE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE!] Ever said something totally harmless and watched your partner’s face fall like you just insulted their soul? You’re not alone. This episode dives into the invisible gap between what we say and what our partner hears, especially when we’re tired, touched out, and trying to survive modern parenthood. Because good intentions don’t always translate into connection. Sometimes, they land as daggers. Join me as I unpack why even loving words can trigger pain and disconnection. Drawing from real client stories and practical psychology, we’ll explore why tone, timing, and unspoken emotional baggage matter so much more than we realize. This isn’t about walking on eggshells. It’s about building awareness, so your words become bridges instead of battlegrounds. 🎧 Today we explore: Why parenting stress amplifies emotional triggers How miscommunication happens even with the best intentions The 3 invisible factors behind disconnection (tone, timing, trauma) How to start responding from empathy instead of defense You’ll also walk away with my 3P tool to help you shift from reacting to reconnecting. Whether you’re the one feeling misunderstood or you’re trying to understand your partner better, this episode is a must-listen for anyone craving closeness after kids. 👉 Don’t forget to subscribe to my free weekly love letter, The Sunday Reconnect, for exclusive insights and tools. https://markellakaplani.com/newsletter GET THE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website: https://markellakaplani.com; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Why Communication Tools May Cause Distance in Relationships: Deep Listening with Dr. Alifano | Ep. 63
Have you ever wondered why communication tools sometimes don’t appear to work in relationships, even when you’re trying your best? Or why you and your partner keep having the same argument again and again? If you’ve been asking yourself, “how to fix emotional distance in a relationship,” or “why am I not feeling heard in my marriage,” this episode is for you. In today’s powerful conversation, I sit down with Dr. Randall Alifano, a clinical psychologist, therapist of 40+ years, and author of Listening in the Raw, to explore what real listening in a relationship looks like. We dive deep into the difference between empathy and performing empathy, and why using communication tools in marriage can sometimes make things worse instead of better. You’ll learn how childhood wounds show up in marriage, how to spot emotional filters in couples communication, and what happens when we stop reacting and start responding, not from defense, but from curiosity. This episode is packed with insights for anyone wondering: 👉 how to stop taking things personally in a relationship 👉 how to listen to your partner without judgment 👉 how to repair a relationship after a fight 👉 how to create emotional intimacy in marriage 👉 why listening is more important than fixing in relationships We also touch on the traps of modern self-development and why “do your own work” isn’t enough when you’re in a partnership. Dr. Alifano shares how interdependence in relationships creates real connection and why your body’s reaction during a conflict might tell you more than your thoughts ever could. Whether you’re a parent, a partner, or a therapist yourself, you’ll leave this episode with practical tools and a softer lens. If you've ever Googled how to stop arguing with your spouse, how to connect with your partner again, or how to improve communication in marriage, this conversation is a must-listen. We also explore: 👉 the pursuer-withdrawer dynamic in relationships 👉 how to repair connection with your child after yelling 👉 how to listen without taking over the conversation 👉 how to stay calm during an argument Dr. Alifano’s presence is grounding and wise and this episode is a gentle but radical invitation to rethink the way you relate. You’ll laugh, you might cry, and you’ll definitely finish with a fresh take on what makes relationships work as well as what might be quietly getting in the way. 🎧 Tune in now and don’t forget to subscribe if you’re on a journey to create more emotional connection in marriage and family life. 💌 SIGN UP: This week’s loveletter includes 1 insight, 1 exclusive tool, as well as 1 three-minute reset to help you track small emotional wins. Get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. — Who is Dr. Randall Alifano? Dr. Randall Alifano has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is an Ordained Minister with over 40 years of experience integrating psychology and spirituality in his private practice. He has worked with a diverse group of people at various stages of their lives, listening to their dreams and aspirations, traumas and confusions, and their desire to live life more attuned to their inner wisdom. And he has loved doing it his entire career. Over the decades, he has studied numerous theories and methodologies (both psychological and spiritual) and they have all filtered down to inform who he is and how he works. Website: RandallAlifanophd.com Book: Listening in the Raw - Get it on Amazon Paperback: https://a.co/d/1OgqHoR Audiobook: https://a.co/d/1vITt8X Kindle: https://a.co/d/9XR07G4 --- Full Transcript HERE. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1QNX6N5IAyM_kI4PKPtcWnoPRPvw11_TNyvpueIRT0hY/edit?usp=sharing Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉 GET THE FREE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! https://markellakaplani.com/intimacyin5minutes 👉Here are my top Resources: https://www.markellakaplani.com/resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter: http://markellakaplani.com/newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge: http://markellakaplani.com/challenge 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani: https://www.instagram.com/markella.kaplani/ Website: https://www.markellakaplani.com/ E-mail: [email protected] 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! https://podcasts.apple.com/gr/podcast/the-parenthood-and-relationship-podcast/id1739098480 Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Emotional Labor in Parenting: 3 Tools to Get Out of Roommate Phase after Baby | Ep. 62
GET THE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! If you’ve ever found yourself lying next to your partner at night feeling more like co-parents than lovers, wondering why you feel disconnected despite still loving each other then this episode is for you. In this week's episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we’re diving deep into the invisible force that could be draining your emotional closeness without either of you realizing it: emotional labor in parenting. Maybe you're not arguing. Maybe your schedules are full. Maybe the kids are thriving. And yet, something feels off. You catch yourself thinking, “Is it the sex? Is it that we don’t talk like we used to?” But when you try to fix it with a date night or a long talk, it doesn’t always hit the spot. Why? Because intimacy isn’t just about sex or deep conversations. It’s about feeling seen, held, and recognized, especially in the chaos of family life. And emotional labor in relationships, especially for parents, is often what’s causing the slow drift that no one talks about. We’ll explore why emotional labor in relationships becomes heavier after children arrive and why couples start to experience emotional distance in marriage, even when the love hasn’t gone anywhere. You’ll learn how everyday tasks (from packing school lunches to remembering grandparents' birthdays) create an emotional load that’s rarely acknowledged, and how that load impacts closeness, connection, and desire. This episode also unpacks the sneaky feeling of being “fine but not great.” That quiet ache of feeling like roommates in marriage is one of the most common things I hear from couples, and it’s often the beginning of a slippery slope toward disconnection - not because the relationship is broken, but because your version of intimacy needs to evolve. If you’ve been asking yourself how to reconnect after kids, or if you’re searching for what intimacy after parenthood really looks like (hint: it’s not always candlelit dinners), you’re in the right place. I’ll also guide you through three tiny yet transformative rituals you can start this week; no scheduling, therapy, or “fixing” required. These are invitations to start noticing each other again, to shift from performance to presence, and to slowly rebuild emotional intimacy in long-term relationships that have been weathered by parenting. Whether you're a few months into parenting or many years in, this is a powerful listen that brings empathy, relief, and direction. It’s not about blame. It’s about awareness. Because once you understand how emotional labor in parenting shows up in your home and heart, you’ll start to see your relationship through a more compassionate lens. If you’re wondering how to reconnect with your partner, especially when life is too busy for grand romantic gestures, you’ll walk away feeling less alone, more understood, and equipped with practical tools that fit into your real life. So if you’re ready to go from surviving to reconnecting, press play. You’ll hear real talk, tangible practices, and a perspective that honors your role as a parent and a partner. Because you can still have love, warmth, and connection, even in the messy middle. GET THE INTIMACY in 5 MINUTE GUIDE! 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Invisible Work in Parenthood | Understanding Emotional Labor and How to Rebalance | Ep. 61
Have you ever felt like you're the one holding your relationship and family together — not just with tasks, but with emotional glue? Like you're the radar, the planner, the peacekeeper… and no one really notices? In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we name it: emotional labor. But not the oversimplified version you see in viral posts. We go deeper into the invisible roles we inherit, the silent deals we never consented to, and the part of you that believes: “If I don’t hold it together, we’ll fall apart.” You’ll explore the subconscious scripts that dictate your behavior, not to blame anyone, but to bring clarity, choice, and intimacy back to the forefront of your relationship. Because when we rewrite those scripts, we free ourselves and our partners from patterns that no longer serve. Today we explore: What emotional labor actually is; beyond the to-do list How your childhood shaped the emotional role you play in relationships The silent “contracts” you never agreed to but still uphold How naming the pattern is the first step toward emotional intimacy 💌 Don’t forget: This episode includes a journaling prompt and a free worksheet to help you unpack and gently rewrite the emotional roles you’ve taken on. Get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. — Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Emotional Safety in Marriage | Why Conversation Isn’t Always the Cure | Ep. 60
Have you ever sat next to your partner, not angry, not even distant on purpose, and still felt miles apart? This episode is for couples who love each other deeply… but no longer feel it. We go beyond the usual communication advice and explore how emotional intimacy is often blocked not by a lack of love but by a nervous system that no longer feels safe. If you’re parenting, stretched thin, or just too exhausted for deep talks, you’ll discover why co-regulation, somatic cues, and body-based safety matter more than ever in your relationship. We unpack the hidden impact of nervous system dysregulation on emotional connection, and I’ll guide you through 3 simple but powerful invitations to begin reconnecting without needing long conversations, date nights, or perfect words. This is intimacy from the inside out. Today we explore: 🔍 Why you feel emotionally distant even when nothing’s “wrong” 💬 What happens when your nervous systems stop syncing 🧠 How emotional safety rewires intimacy more than communication skills ❤️ The quiet, somatic ways to reconnect without talking 💌 Don’t forget The Sunday Reconnect: This week’s loveletter includes one insight, one tool, and one three-minute reset to help you feel closer to yourself and to the people you love. You can sign up at markellakaplani.com/newsletter — Past Episodes on Improving Communication in Couples How does parenthood affect marriage: Are parenting challenges to blame for relationship issues? | Ep. 2 Communication skills for couples: Navigating parenthood and parenting together | Ep. 9 Resentment in Marriage: How Parenthood Brings up Old Wounds and How to Heal | Ep. 31 Wondering How to Rekindle a Relationship After Children? 3 Stages… | Ep. 34 The 4 Types of Connection & Ways to Rekindle the Romance with Dr. Adam Dorsay | Ep. 37 Signs of Drifting Apart in a Relationship: 6-Step Framework to Bridge the Emotional Distance in Parenthood | Ep. 40 Love Language Not Working Anymore? How Parenthood, Stress, and Identity Shifts Change Emotional Needs in Marriage and Long-Term Relationships | Ep. 52 Unhappy Marriage After Baby? Rebuilding Emotional Closeness in Parenthood Using Love Languages | Ep. 54 -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Couples’ Immersive Program 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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How to Stop Yelling and Start Reconnecting | Parenting from a Regulated Nervous System w/ Jaspreet Chopra | Ep. 59
So many parents I work with tell me the same thing: “I thought I’d be different.” We want to be gentle, connected, patient. But when the pressure builds… we feel hijacked by old patterns. This week, I sat down with trauma-informed parent coach Jaspreet Chopra Lewis to talk about why that happens — and what to do about it. We talked about inherited patterns like emotional invalidation, the exhausting pendulum between too much control and too much guilt, and how nervous system work can help you shift in real-time, not just in hindsight. 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. — Who is Jaspreet Chopra Lewis? Jaspreet is a Trauma Informed Parent Coach and a Polyvagal Informed music interventionist. She strongly believes that focusing on behavior modification will never help you develop a deeply connected relationship with your child. Real change happens when parents do the work, heal from their own childhood, and see their child's experience from a fresh perspective and not from a lens that is colored by conventional thoughts, their own childhood experiences and their current stresses. And that's how children can be led into better behavior, better choices and emotional regulation. Her frameworks for healing and parenting draw hugely from the works of Dr. Gabor Mate, Dr. Stephen Porges and Dr. Daniel Seigel. Jaspreet has over 24 years of experience in journalism, operations & management, training and coaching. Apart from supporting parents in their parenting journey, she is also actively working to create safe spaces for women and children through awareness programs. Jaspreet's Resource: www.themindfulfamily.in/trigger-to-triumph — Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected] 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Healing While Parenting | 4 Small Shifts That Change Everything | Ep. 58
What if healing isn’t something you have to do before parenting but something you do within it? In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we explore what healing really looks like when you’re not at a retreat, but in a home full of snack crumbs, emotional meltdowns, and endless to-do lists. This isn’t about becoming a brand new person. It’s about becoming a softer, braver, more present version of yourself, right in the middle of the mess. We talk about how parenting can awaken the parts of us that were never truly seen, how to show up for ourselves while showing up for our kids, and why the smallest unseen moments, the breath, the pause, the whispered “I’m sorry,” are what changes everything. Today we explore: - Why healing during parenthood is harder — but more meaningful - 4 gentle shifts to start healing even when you’re exhausted - Why perfection isn’t the goal, presence is - How to rewire your inner voice with compassion 💌 Don’t forget: This week’s newsletter includes an exclusive tool to help you track small emotional wins get it at markellakaplani.com/newsletter. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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How Invisible Family Patterns Shape Your Parenting (and Ways to Start Parenting Consciously) | Ep. 57
Have you ever caught yourself reacting to your child in a way that feels all too familiar, perhaps echoing your own parents' responses? These moments often reveal the invisible family patterns we've unconsciously inherited. In Episode 57 of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we explore how these unseen scripts shape our parenting styles and emotional responses. We'll discuss how to identify these patterns, understand their origins, and take the first steps toward conscious change. Today we explore: What invisible family patterns are and how they form Recognizing when these patterns influence your parenting Strategies to begin altering these inherited behaviors The importance of self-compassion in the journey of change Join me as we delve into the transformative process of becoming more aware of our inherited parenting styles and learn how to foster a more intentional and connected relationship with our children. -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Feeling Triggered? How to Spot When Parenting Brings Up Old Childhood Wounds | Ep. 56
Have you ever surprised yourself with how intensely you reacted to your child? That flood of anger or shame? The moment where a small behavior felt so deeply personal? This episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast dives into the tender truth that parenting often reawakens childhood wounds—and that’s not a flaw, it’s an invitation. When our children act out, they're often unknowingly tapping into something buried within us: a memory, a hurt, a part of ourselves still waiting to be seen. In this first episode of our May series, Healing the Past to Parent Better, we explore the concept of emotional triggers in parenting and why reactions like yelling, shutting down, or intense guilt often stem from the past, not the present. You’ll learn how to spot disproportionate emotional responses when shame might actually be a sign of something deeper, and how to gently begin reparenting yourself while raising your child. If you're ready to break generational cycles, build self-awareness, and respond from wholeness instead of wounding—this conversation is for you. Today we explore: 🔍 Why your child’s behavior triggers disproportionate reactions 💬 How to know if you’re reacting from an old wound 🧠 A powerful question to interrupt patterns ❤️ Why this isn’t just parenting—it’s healing -- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Rocky Marriage After Baby? Love Languages Aren’t Enough | Communication, Neurodivergence, and Repair with Lodovica Guidarelli | Ep. 55
Why do couples who love each other still drift apart after having children? Why do the very efforts meant to show love often miss the mark? In this heart-opening conversation, Marriage & Family Therapist Lodovica Guidarelli joins us to unpack why emotional disconnection happens even in committed marriages, and how love languages, unspoken expectations, co-leadership, and even undiagnosed neurodivergence can quietly erode intimacy. We don’t just blame “communication issues.” We get honest about what really pulls couples apart, and more importantly, how they can find each other again. If you're feeling unseen, unappreciated, or stuck in endless loops of misunderstanding, this episode will help you feel understood and offer a compassionate roadmap back to connection. Today we uncover: 🔍 Why emotional distance grows after parenthood 💬 How love languages can be misinterpreted 🧠 The hidden impact of neurodivergence in marriage ❤️ Why co-leading (not just supporting) matters Stop assigning painful meanings to relationship struggles. There's a different, and more hopeful, way to understand and repair. ✨ Tune in for powerful insights that could change the way you see your partner... and yourself. — Who is Lodovica Guidarelli? Lodovica Guidarelli is an Italian-American Marriage and Family Therapist, married, and mother of two. She works with couples, individuals, and parents, both online and in person, in the state of California. In her work, she integrates somatic and trauma-informed approaches, such as EMDR, Internal Family Systems, Brainspotting, and Narrative Therapy. You can find her at: www.lodovicaguidarelli.com [email protected] via text at 858-255-0895 And don’t forget to mention the Parenthood and Relationship Podcast and get your 50% discount for your first session, should you decide to work with Lodovica! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Unhappy Marriage After Baby? Rebuilding Emotional Closeness in Parenthood Using Love Languages | Ep. 54
What if the problem isn’t your partner… but that you’re both trying to love each other in old ways that no longer fit? In this gentle and reflective episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we explore how relearning love is essential after parenthood — especially when the spark feels faint, but the love is still there. You may not be in crisis, but if you're feeling more like roommates in marriage than lovers, or wondering why the emotional connection after babyfeels different, you are not alone. We’ll talk about why parenthood affects marriage, how to recognize the signs of emotional disconnection, and the quiet ache of missing your partner when they’re right next to you. If you've ever thought, “I love my partner, but I don’t feel in love,” this is for you. No pressure. No perfection. Just simple, real-world tools for tired parents who want to feel close again—like micro rituals, weekly check-in questions, and using love languages in marriage as a compass, not a rulebook. It’s about building emotional intimacy slowly, kindly, and with more awareness. ✨ This week’s free journaling prompt is designed to help you tune into what kind of love you need now—not what worked before kids. Download it via markellakaplani.com/newsletter. Today we explore: 🔍 How parenthood changes your emotional needs 💬 Signs you're emotionally ready to reconnect 🧠 Tiny rituals that restore intimacy ❤️ Why love after baby requires a new emotional language --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 📢 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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When Love Gets Lost in Translation: Navigating Mismatched Love Languages in Parenthood | Ep. 53
You’re doing your best—making lunches, folding laundry, handling bedtime routines. Yet, something feels off. Your partner seems distant, and despite your efforts, the emotional connection is missing. In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we delve into the complexities of love languages in the context of parenting. As responsibilities increase, couples often find themselves expressing love in ways that may not resonate with their partner. This mismatch can lead to feelings of being unappreciated and misunderstood. We explore why these mismatches occur, especially during the demanding phase of early parenthood. Factors like stress, fatigue, and changing personal needs can alter how we give and receive love. Understanding these dynamics is crucial for maintaining a strong emotional bond. This episode offers practical strategies to bridge the gap: - Recognizing and respecting each other’s love languages. - Implementing regular check-ins to stay emotionally connected. - Learning to express love in ways that resonate with your partner. By becoming more attuned to each other’s emotional needs, couples can foster a deeper connection, even amidst the chaos of parenting. To support this journey, I’ve created a free journaling prompt designed to help you reflect on your love language and better understand your partner’s. Sign up for my newsletter at markellakaplani.com/newsletter to receive this resource directly in your inbox. Remember, love languages can evolve, especially during significant life changes like becoming a parent. By staying curious and open, you can navigate these changes together, strengthening your relationship along the way. -- 🎁 Want extra support? Download my free journaling prompt to discover your current love language at markellakaplani.com/newsletter -- Full Transcript HERE. -- Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉 Subscribe for more parenting insights 👉 Grab my top Resources 👉 Get on my [FREE] Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Love Language Not Working Anymore? How Parenthood, Stress, and Identity Shifts Change Emotional Needs in Marriage and Long-Term Relationships | Ep. 52
Have you ever thought, “Why doesn’t love feel the same anymore?” Maybe you used to love hugs, long talks, or sweet texts… but now, you just want someone to do the dishes or give you five minutes alone. If this sounds familiar, you're not alone. In today’s episode, we talk about something a lot of people wonder but don’t always say out loud: "Why doesn’t my love language work anymore after having kids?" If you've been searching things like: “My love language changed after baby” “I don’t like hugs anymore after becoming a mom” “Why am I annoyed when my partner says I love you?” “Love languages in marriage after kids” …you are in the right place. When we become parents, everything changes. Our energy, our emotions, our body, our brain — all of it. And that means the way we feel love changes too. In this episode, I explain: What love languages are (in simple words) Why they often stop working after you have kids How parenthood rewires your brain and body What to do when you feel disconnected from your partner How to figure out what you need now, not what used to work before Whether you’re feeling emotionally distant in your relationship, wondering if something is wrong, or just confused about why your partner’s kind gestures don’t hit like they used to, this episode will help you understand what’s really going on. And no, you’re not cold or ungrateful. You’re simply adjusting to a new season. Your needs have changed — and that’s okay. We’ll also talk about matrescence and patrescence — two big words that describe how our identity changes when we become parents. These changes touch everything, including the way we love and connect. At the end, I’ll walk you through 4 simple steps to figure out what kind of love and support you need now. It’s not about fixing yourself — it’s about getting curious and starting a fresh, honest conversation with yourself… and your partner. 🎁 Want extra support? Download my free journaling prompt to discover your current love language at markellakaplani.com/newsletter --- Full Transcript HERE. -- Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉 Subscribe for more parenting insights 👉 Grab my top Resources 👉 Get on my [FREE] Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Postpartum Identity Crisis? How to Reignite Joy and Purpose in Small Doses | Ep. 51
There’s a version of you that no one sees anymore—not because she’s gone, but because life got so loud and she got so quiet. In today’s episode, we sit down with that forgotten part of you and whisper: “I still see you.” Through real listener questions, I explore the hidden emotional terrain so many parents walk silently: from grieving lost freedom, to watching your partner thrive while you unravel, to the numbness that creeps in and replaces passion with survival. There is nothing wrong with you. You’re becoming. And together, we’ll name what’s been exiled, explore how identity gets reshaped in the trenches of caregiving, and discover how small acts of self-connection can start bringing you back. Today we explore: The invisible grief that lives inside parental love Why your partner might be thriving while you feel lost The neuroscience behind emotional numbness and creativity blocks What it means to reclaim yourself—gently, without guilt Whether you’re hiding in the bathroom with your earbuds or taking a quiet solo walk, this episode is your mirror. Come back to yourself, one breath at a time. --- Full Transcript HERE. --- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! -- Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Got Pelvic Floor Pain After Birth? Uncovering Hidden Postpartum Trauma & The Effect on Our Relationship with Lynn Schulte | Ep. 50
Have you ever wondered if your back pain, discomfort during intimacy, or even that nagging feeling that “something’s just off” might be rooted in your birth experience — even if it happened years ago? In today’s powerful conversation, I’m joined by Lynn Schulte, a pelvic health physical therapist with over 30 years of experience and a pioneer in recognizing what she calls the “open birthing pattern.” Together, we unpack how childbirth — even when it seems “normal” — can leave lasting, unspoken impacts on our body, emotions, and relationships. From misunderstood C-section scar pain to the quiet grief of disconnection after birth, we explore the stories that get trapped in our tissues — and how healing is always possible, no matter how long it’s been. This episode is a must-listen for anyone who has given birth, loves someone who has, or wants to understand the hidden journey of postpartum recovery. 💥 Spoiler: It's never too late to heal. Today we explore: The truth about pelvic pain, even years postpartum Why C-section scars can cause issues decades later How trauma manifests physically (and how to release it) What disconnection does to intimacy and how to come back home to your body LISTEN IN! — Full Transcript HERE — Lynn Schulte’s Links SOCIAL MEDIA Facebook Instagram YouTube Website VIDEOS How to Close the Open Birthing Pattern in the Pelvis How to Massage Your C-Section Scar TRAININGS +MORE Institute For Birth Healing Directory of Providers Center for Birth Healing Clinical Practice to set up one-on-one sessions in Person or Online Institute for Birth Healing Online Courses for Providers Confidence in Your Core, Pelvic Floor and More for MOMS -- Want to take our relationship to the next level? 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! 👉 Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Reinvent Yourself After Parenthood: Embracing The Identity Shift | Matrescence | Paretrence | Ep. 49
Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “Who even am I anymore?” Between sleepless nights, endless responsibilities, and taking care of everyone else, you may feel like you got lost somewhere along the way. That feeling of identity loss after kids and losing yourself in motherhood /fatherhood is more common than you think—but what if the goal isn’t to go back to who you were before? What if instead, you get to redesign who you are becoming? In this episode, we’re moving beyond recognition and into action. You'll learn how to reclaim your identity after baby without parental guilt, honor both who you were and who you are becoming, and create a version of yourself that feels true. In this episode, we explore: 🔹 Why rediscovering yourself after baby doesn’t mean “going back” 🔹 What to keep from your past self & what to release 🔹 How parenthood expands you—rather than erases you 🔹 Powerful exercises to help you find yourself again You get to choose who this new version of you is. Let’s take that first step—together. 🎧 Listen now & reclaim YOU –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — The [free] reconnect with yourself calendar that I referred to: https://www.markellakaplani.com/selfconnectcalendar -- Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Why Parenthood Feels So Lonely (Even When You're Never Alone) | ReDiscovering You Series [⅔] | Ep. 48
Have you ever felt lonely even with your partner sitting across from you or your child snuggled in your arms? Parenthood changes everything—including how connected you feel in your relationships. Many parents silently experience emotional disconnection, wondering why they feel distant from their partner or why friendships have faded. This episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast dives deep into why parenthood can feel isolating, even in a full house. We uncover the hidden causes of parental loneliness, the subtle signs that emotional distance is creeping in, and how to reconnect without adding more to your already full plate. Whether your conversations have turned into logistical checklists, you miss deep connection with your partner, or you hesitate to reach out to old friends, this episode gives you simple, actionable ways to rebuild emotional intimacy. If you’ve been wondering, ‘Why do I feel so lonely as a parent?’ or ‘How can I reconnect with my partner?’, this episode is for you. Tune in, take a deep breath, and know that connection is possible again. Listen now! –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Feeling Lost After Kids? How to Rediscover Yourself in Parenthood | Matrescence | Patrescence | Ep. 47 | [Rediscover You Series 1/3]
You know that moment—you’re cleaning up after your kids, scrolling on your phone, and suddenly it hits you: “Who even am I anymore?” Maybe you used to have hobbies, dreams, and interests. But now, your whole identity seems wrapped up in being a parent. You love your kids, but… where did YOU go? If you’ve ever felt that way, you’re not alone. This parenthood identity crisis is more common than we talk about. And the truth? It’s not your fault. 🎙️ In today’s episode, we’re diving into: What exactly is matrescence and patrescence (aka the massive identity shifts that happen when we become parents) The hidden reasons behind postpartum identity crisis and why so many moms and dads feel like they’ve disappeared How to stop feeling like you’re losing yourself in parenthood The difference between parental guilt and true self-sacrifice—and how to release the shame How to start rediscovering yourself after parenthood in small, guilt-free ways It’s so easy to get stuck in survival mode—especially if you’re a stay-at-home parent feeling unfulfilled or struggling with the transition to parenthood. Maybe you thought you’d naturally “figure it out,” but instead, you’re feeling lost, exhausted, and like you don’t even recognize yourself anymore. But here’s the thing: You are more than “just a parent.” 🌿 So, how do we start reclaiming YOU? ✅ Shift your mindset—Parenthood and identity CAN co-exist. You don’t have to choose between being a great parent and being you. ✅ Rebuild your confidence—Finding purpose outside of parenthood doesn’t mean you love your kids any less. ✅ Let go of the guilt—Overcoming guilt and shame starts with recognizing that self-care isn’t selfish. ✅ Take small, intentional steps—Whether it’s a parental transformation or simply making time for yourself, it’s about reconnection, not reinvention. Parenthood changes you. That’s inevitable. But losing yourself completely? That’s not a requirement. So, if you’re feeling lost as a parent, struggling with balancing parenthood and career, or just wondering if you’ll ever feel like yourself again—this episode is for you. 💌 I’ve also put together a free guided journaling exercise to help you pinpoint what’s missing and start reclaiming YOU today. You can grab it through my newsletter—I’ll share the details at the end of the episode. 🎧 Hit play now, and let’s start the journey back to YOU. #parenthoodidentitycrisis #feelinglostasaparent #rediscovery #matrescence #patrescence –- 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support - markellakaplani.com/newsletter 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide - markellakaplani.com/calmparentcalmchild 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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From Crisis to Connection: Andrea Smith on Navigating Parenting & Marriage Challenges | Ep. 46
Parenting can push even the strongest marriages to their limits. In this deeply moving episode, Andrea Smith opens up about navigating parenthood stress while facing family challenges that tested her marriage connection. She shares the raw truth of what happens when one parent carries the emotional load alone—and the powerful shift that helped her and her husband reconnect. If you’ve ever felt disconnected from your partner, trapped in survival mode parenting, or unsure how to support each other through tough times, this episode is for you. Andrea describes her unique journey through matrescence, from being immersed into motherhood fully to then wondering who she is after her children healed and moved from the nest. Andrea’s story is a testament to rebuilding relationships, finding emotional resilience, and breaking free from the patterns that keep couples stuck after parenthood. 💬 Today we uncover: ✅ The silent weight of parental burnout & why sharing the load matters ✅ A game-changing mindset shift that transformed their marriage struggles ✅ Why love alone isn’t enough—and what actually makes a relationship thrive ✅ How to heal from emotional distance in relationships ✅ The unexpected role of playfulness in long-term marriage success If this episode speaks to you, be sure to join my newsletter for deeper insights & a special journaling prompt to help you apply these lessons. Sign up at MarkellaKaplani.com/newsletter 💌 — Andrea Smith is a passionate advocate for mental health and personal growth, blending her experiences as a mother, entrepreneur, and storyteller to inspire others. After an 18-year corporate career in sales, Andrea stepped away to focus on her family's needs, particularly her children's mental health challenges. Now, with her children thriving as young adults, Andrea has channeled her journey into This Way Up, a podcast dedicated to supporting parents and caregivers navigating similar struggles. Andrea is also the co-founder of CarOracle, a woman-owned business revolutionizing the car-buying process with expert guidance and personalized support. With her empathetic approach and commitment to uplifting others, Andrea creates spaces where people can find resources, resilience, and hope. Andrea’s Links: Facebook: @ListentoThisWayUp Instagram: @ListentoThisWayUp You Tube: @ThisWayUpPodcast TikTok: @ThisWayUpPodcastandrea www.caroracle.com — MARKELLA’S LINKS 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for EXCLUSIVE practical tools - markellakaplani.com/newsletter 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide - markellakaplani.com/calmparentcalmchild 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Rethinking Parenthood: Emotional Resilience and Balance in Parenting | Gentle Parenting | Ep 45
In this episode, we explore the drastic changes in parenting styles over the years. The shift from the tough love approach of past generations to today's hyper-aware and overly-involved parenting has left many feeling emotionally drained and constantly questioning their adequacy as parents. The episode examines how to find a middle ground that allows for both parental and child development without falling into the trap of self-sacrifice or over-correcting to the point of overprotective. By shifting perspectives on guilt and self-care, parents can model a balanced and fulfilling life for their children, fostering resilience and independence without compromising their own well-being. 00:00 Why Modern Parenthood Feels Like Failure 01:31 The Evolution of Parenting Styles 03:39 The Impact of Tough Love on Our Generation 07:42 The Overcorrection: Hyper-Involved Parenting 12:43 Finding Balance in Parenting 16:22 Modeling Healthy Relationships for Our Kids 18:53 Steps to Sustainable Parenting 23:42 The Importance of Self-Care for Parents 31:31 Conclusion: You Are Enough --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Perfect Parent Syndrome? Attachment Theory on the Dangers of Perfect Parenting vs. Good Enough Parenting | Learn Positive Parenting Tips | Ep. 44
We all want to do our best as parents, but perfect parenting might not be the gift we think it is. In fact, striving to be a perfect mother or a perfect father can actually create struggles for our kids later in life. This episode dives into why perfect parent syndrome leads to emotional dependence, low frustration tolerance, and unrealistic relationship expectations. So, what is good parenting? Research in attachment theory shows that kids don’t need us to be flawless—they need us to be real. The concept of good enough parenting, first introduced by Donald Winnicott, explains why children benefit more from good enough parenting than from a parent who never makes mistakes. The ability to repair small ruptures in relationships, rather than avoiding them altogether, builds resilience, emotional intelligence, and self-trust. In this episode, I’ll be sharing positive parenting tips to help you shift from trying to figure out how to be a perfect parent to embracing a more balanced approach. You’ll learn why letting go of perfection doesn’t mean lowering your standards but actually making space for connection, growth, and emotional security. I’ll also share a case study about a client, “Michael,” who was raised by a perfect mother. His childhood was full of warmth, attentiveness, and love—but as an adult, he struggled to form meaningful relationships because no one could measure up to that level of emotional perfection. This is why it's so important to rethink how to be a perfect mother or how to be a perfect father and instead embrace good enough parenting. If you’ve ever felt guilty for not getting everything right, this episode will help you reframe your mindset and show you how being “good enough” is actually the best thing you can do for your child. — 🔔 Subscribe for more parenting insights 📩 Join my [FREE] newsletter for extra support 👉 Get the [FREE] Calm Parent, Calm Child Guide 📢 Share this with a parent who needs to hear it! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Communication Breakdowns After Baby: Why Couples Stop Talking & How to Fix It | Ep. 43
Feeling distant from your partner after having a baby? You’re not alone. Many couples struggle with communication breakdowns after becoming parents, leaving them feeling disconnected, unheard, and even questioning their relationship. In this episode, we’ll dive into: ✔️ Why couples stop talking after kids (it’s not just sleep deprivation!) ✔️ The hidden reasons behind emotional distance in parenthood ✔️ How to recognize the signs of communication breakdown before it’s too late ✔️ Tested strategies to bring back meaningful conversations and intimacy If your relationship feels like it’s running on autopilot, don’t wait until resentment builds up. Learn how to reset communication, reconnect emotionally, and rebuild your bond as partners—not just co-parents. --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Overcoming Motherhood Rage: The Matrescence Journey to Healing with Sami Evanson | Ep. 42
Motherhood can be beautiful, but it can also bring unexpected challenges like postpartum rage—a raw and often unspoken aspect of the matrescence journey. In this heartfelt episode, we dive deep into the emotional layers of being an overwhelmed mom and why some moms experience feelings of anger and frustration in the early stages of motherhood. Through Sami's deeply personal story, we explore the intersection of postpartum struggles, motherhood challenges, and the healing power of self-awareness. Together, we uncover how a supportive motherhood community, small pockets of self-care, and honest conversations about emotional burnout can transform rage into growth. ✨ Today, we find out: 🌿 Why postpartum rage isn’t your fault (and how to address it) 🧡 How self-care isn’t selfish but essential for moms 🕊️ The connection between gentle parenting and self-compassion 🌈 The power of repair: How making mistakes can strengthen bonds If you’ve ever felt like an overwhelmed mom on the edge or questioned if your parenting struggles are “normal,” this episode is for you. Discover actionable self-care tips for moms and embark on your own healing journey to find peace amidst the chaos. You’re not alone—tune in and start reclaiming joy in your motherhood experience today. --- Full Episode Transcript HERE --- Sami's Details and Links Sami is a mom of 2 young girls and joyfully shares life with everyone she meets. She's on a mission to help moms have access to resources and tools to make their motherhood journey easier and more fun. She loves being outside and finding ways to enjoy life more with her family. Sami is the master curator of GEMs resource library, bringing the best resources together to help moms find community, support, freedom and fun in motherhood. Website- Www.Goodenoughmatrescence.com IG- @goodenoughmatrescence Free 5 min meditation to find calm during the storm- www.goodenoughmatrescence.com/calm Toolkit of my go tos to break the anger cycle- www.goodenoughmatrescence.com/mama-reset-toolkit --- Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Feeling Anxious After Baby? How to Recognize and Manage Postpartum Anxiety | Ep. 41
Postpartum anxiety affects 1 in 5 mothers, yet many don’t realize what’s happening. You’re not alone, and you’re not failing. Anxiety in new parenthood can feel like an unrelenting fire alarm, keeping you on edge and stealing the joy from those precious first months. This episode unpacks the emotional and physical toll postpartum anxiety takes and how societal pressures can make it worse. But there’s hope! You’ll learn five actionable strategies, from mindfulness practices to reframing anxious thoughts, to help you regain clarity and connection. Today, we’ll uncover: 🌸 What postpartum anxiety really is 🛑 Signs to look for in yourself or a partner 🤲 Ways to seek support without guilt 🧘♀️ Simple tools for grounding yourself Postpartum anxiety doesn’t mean you’re weak or broken. It’s a sign your system needs compassion and care. Listen now and take your first step toward healing—for you and your family. --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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Signs of Drifting Apart in a Relationship: 6-Step Framework to Bridge the Emotional Distance in Parenthood | Ep. 40
Are you worried that your relationship is drifting apart after becoming parents? You’re not alone. Parenthood changes everything, including the way we connect with our partners. In this episode, I dive into the subtle yet powerful signs of emotional distance in relationships, especially for couples navigating the demands of parenthood. Using my 6-step framework, I’ll guide you through how to bridge the emotional gap, rekindle intimacy, and rebuild your connection with simple, intentional actions. We’ll discuss common causes of disconnection, such as the energy drain of parenting, identity shifts in matrescence and patrescence, and unmet expectations that silently grow into resentment. You’ll also learn how to spot early warning signs like reduced communication, a lack of physical affection, and lingering conflicts that never seem to resolve. I’ll share real-life examples and practical tools you can start using today, including journaling prompts to help you reflect on what truly matters in your relationship. Whether you’re dealing with small signs of disconnection or feel like you’re at a breaking point, this episode will give you actionable steps to reignite the closeness you once had. This is perfect for parents who want to strengthen their marriage, create a healthier family dynamic, and ensure their kids grow up in a loving and connected environment. If you’re ready to take the next step, I also introduce my Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge, designed for busy parents who want to reignite their relationship in just seven days. Don’t let emotional distance grow into something bigger—take action today. Subscribe for more content on parenthood, relationships, and creating a life where you can thrive as a couple and a family. Let’s navigate the challenges of parenthood together! --- Full Transcript HERE. — Want to take our relationship to the next level? 👉Here are my top Resources 👉 Link to my Newsletter 👉 Join the Reconnect with Your Partner Challenge 📩 Get in touch with me (Instagram @markella.kaplani; website; e-mail: [email protected]) 🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world! --- Markella Kaplani, M.A. Clinical-Counseling Psychologist Parenthood & Relationship Coach www.markellakaplani.com
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, hosted by clinical-counseling psychologist and parenthood coach Markella Kaplani, offers a deep exploration of the emotional and psychological challenges of becoming a parent. Diving into topics like matrescence, patrescence, and the loss of identity, this podcast is designed to provide holistic, compassionate insights for those looking to navigate the complex dynamics of parenthood and relationships. With weekly 10-minute episodes focused on personal growth, overcoming parental guilt, and strengthening family bonds, it invites listeners to join a supportive community dedicated to personal and relational fulfillment.
HOSTED BY
Markella Kaplani - Clinical-Counseling Psychologist | Parenthood & Relationship Coach | Matrescence Expert
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