PODCAST · health
Addiction Makes Three
by Amanda Lockyer
Addiction Makes Three The Podcast, with Amanda Lockyer is dedicated to shining a light and understanding the lesser talked about side of addiction. The real impact it has on the partners and families of those that struggle with addiction.Are you struggling with a partners addiction and feel at a complete loss as to what to do?You feel like you have no one to turn to and are worried you'll be judged or your partner will be judged. It can feel like no one understands what you are going through and no one could really imagine what this is really like.We will cover what it is truly like to be on the other side of a loved one struggling with addiction or navigating recovery. We will also dive deep on tools, ideas and strategies that will really help you whether you are at the confusing beginning the messy middle or through the other side, including practical tips and ways that you can actually get back to living again, regardless of the path your partner choo
-
94
90 - I Miss Who I Used To Be: How Survival Mode Slowly Changes You
Sometimes the hardest part about addiction…. is realising how much you have changed too.In this deeply personal episode, Amanda opens up about the grief of losing yourself in survival mode.The anxiety.The hypervigilance.The exhaustion.The version of you that slowly disappeared while trying to hold everything together.Because addiction doesn’t just impact the person struggling.It changes the people around them too.🎧 In this episode, we cover:How survival mode slowly changes youThe grief of losing yourself in addictionWhy hypervigilance becomes your “normal”The hidden emotional exhaustion partners carryWhy you may not recognise yourself anymoreThe difference between your identity and your survival adaptationsRebuilding self-trust and reconnecting with yourselfWhy life is not supposed to feel like constant survival modeYou didn’t lose yourself because you were weak.You lost parts of yourself trying to survive something really hard for a really long time.The version of you that exists in survival mode… is not who you are.It’s an adaptation.And underneath it all?You are still there.So if you’re quietly thinking: “God… I miss myself…”The waitlist for Pathway to Wellness is open if you want to find out more.Amanda has also opened some private “friendly chat” spaces to talk it through with you and support you to take your next smallest step.👉 Join the Waitlist for the Pathway to Wellness Program👉 book in a friendly chat to talk it throughPrivate and confidential. No pressure. Just support.You were never supposed to carry this much for this long.And you deserve to live your life too.And when you are off the addiction roller coaster, and living your life, you're better for you, your family and your loved one and you can lead the way for change in your family.If you’re ready for support to create real change, you don’t have to do this on your own.👉 Join the Waitlist for the Pathway to Wellness Program, or book in a friendly chat with me where we can talk it through and I can suggest the next best smallest step forwards for you.Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
93
89 - Mother’s Day, Addiction, and the Grief No One Talks About
Mother’s Day can bring up a lot for many of us.And when addiction has touched your life… not all of it feels good.Because Mother’s Day can become this painful mix of hope, disappointment and grief all at the same time.In this deeply personal episode, Amanda opens up about the complicated emotional reality of Mother’s Day when addiction is part of your story.From unmet expectations… to feeling unseen… to grieving the version of family life you thought you’d have… this episode puts words to feelings so many people quietly carry.In this episode, we talk about:Why Mother’s Day can feel emotionally heavy in addictionThe hope that “maybe this year will be different”The heartbreak of disappointment and unmet expectationsGrieving the life and relationship you thought you’d haveThe invisible loneliness of high-functioning addictionWhy social media can make these feelings even harderThe meaning we attach to gifts, effort, and feeling seenHow to approach Mother’s Day with more compassion for yourselfBecause truthfullyYou can love your family deeply… and still feel sadness.You can feel grateful… and still grieve what’s missing.And multiple things can be true at once.This episode is for you if:Mother’s Day feels complicatedYou feel unseen or emotionally aloneAddiction has changed how family celebrations feelYou’re carrying grief no one else seems to noticeYou’re trying to hold it all together for everyone elseIf this episode feels close to home… you don’t have to carry this on your own.Amanda has opened up a small number of “talk it through” spaces - a chance to simply talk things through with someone who understands this space.👉 book in a friendly chat hereYou are allowed to have mixed feelings about Mother’s Day.And you are worthy of being seen, appreciated, and cared for too.👉 Resources and support:If you’re ready for support to create real change, you don’t have to do this on your own.👉 Join the Waitlist for the Pathway to Wellness Program, or book in a friendly chat with me where we can talk it through and I can suggest the next best smallest step forwards for you.Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthreeQuestions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
92
88 - Why Learning More About Addiction Might Be Keeping You Stuck
You’ve learnt a lot about addiction.You understand the patterns.You can see what’s happening.You’ve done the reading, the podcasts, the research.So why does it still feel like nothing is changing?In this episode, we’re talking about a trap that’s easy to fall into - especially when you’re trying to handle this better:👉 learning more… instead of doing differentlyBecause at some point, more knowledge doesn’t create change.It keeps you in what I call consumption mode.In this episode, we cover:What “consumption mode” actually looks like (and how to spot it)Why learning more about addiction can start to keep you stuckThe difference between understanding something and being able to act on itWhy you can’t access what you know in high-stress momentsHow your nervous system pulls you back into familiar patternsWhy this isn’t about effort - it’s about implementationWhat actually helps you start doing things differentlyTruthfully...You’re not stuck because you don’t care.And you’re definitely not stuck because you’re not trying.You’re stuck because knowing what to do and being able to do it in real life…are two very different things.Here’s the shiftThere’s no prize for knowing everything about addiction.Change doesn’t come from more information.It comes from:👉 practising something different👉 applying it in real moments👉 getting support while you doIf you’re thinking:“I know so much… but I’m still doing the same things…”You don’t need another podcast.You need support to start doing this differently.👉 Resources and support:If you’re ready for support to create real change, you don’t have to do this on your own. 👉 Join the Waitlist for the Pathway to Wellness Program, or book in a friendly chat with me where we can talk it through and I can suggest the next best smallest step forwards for you.You can study the map all you like…But nothing changes until you actually start walking the path of change.1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: where I can suggest what your next best step forward is, because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree4️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
91
87 - Why It’s Not Getting Better (Even Though You’re Doing Everything Right)
You’re struggling with a loved one’s addiction and you’re trying really hard to make things better.Reading.Listening.Learning everything you can.Trying to handle this better.Trying to respond better.Trying to make things work.And yet…You still find yourself in the same place.Reacting.Overthinking.Carrying it all.And nothing is actually getting better - in fact it’s getting worse.In this episode, we’re talking about why.Because this isn’t a lack of effort.And it’s not because you’re not capable.I am talking about...Why “trying harder” isn’t creating changeThe trap of believing you should be able to handle this aloneHow addiction becomes normalised over timeWhy this isn’t a knowledge problemThe difference between awareness and actual changeWhy doing the same things keeps you stuckI know you’ve done hard things before. Built careers. Raised children. Handled more than most people ever will.So of course you think:“I should be able to do this.”But this is different.You don’t need more information.You need the right support.Because this isn’t something you can think your way out of.If you’re tired of doing more of the same and ending up in the same place…This is your moment to do something different.Not everything.Just one thing.If you’re ready for support, you don’t have to do this on your own.👉 Join the Waitlist for my program, or book in a friendly chat with me where I can suggest the next best step for you.Nothing changes if nothing changes.But that change?It doesn’t have to be everything.Just the next step.👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: where I can suggest what your next best step forward is, because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree4️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
90
86 - I Can’t Keep Doing This: What Happens When You Reach Your Limit
Sometimes it’s not a big moment.Not a crisis.Not the worst day.Not the breaking point you thought it would be.It’s quieter than that.It’s the moment where something inside you says:“I can’t keep doing this like this.”In this episode, we’re talking about that moment.The one where you realise:👉 This isn’t sustainable👉 This isn’t working👉 And something needs to changeEven if you don’t know what that looks like yet.🎧 In this episode, we cover:The “low hum” of anxiety that becomes normalWhy things don’t need to be a crisis to not be okayWhat’s actually in your control (and what isn’t)Why waiting and hoping keeps you stuckThe quiet decision that shifts everythingI know you’ve been holding a lot together for a long time.Managing.Anticipating.Keeping things steady for everyone else.And it’s costing you.The truth is, If nothing changes… nothing changes. And over time? It gets heavier. Not lighter.You don't need to have all the answers. Just to acknowledge:👉 “Not like this.”So iff you’re thinking,“I don’t want another year like this…”Listen to that little whisper.You don’t need everything to fall apart to decide something needs to change.Sometimes it starts with: “Not life like this.”Listen next:Ep 41 - The One Question Not to Ask Someone Struggling With AddictionEp 53 - Are you Gaslighting Yourself? The Quiet Habit Keeping you StuckEp 6 - Painful thought #1 - Why are they choosing a substance over me?Ep 47 - 11 Subtle Signs Your Partner’s Addiction Is Controlling Your Life👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
89
85 - The Part No One Talks About Series: Sobriety Doesn’t Fix the Relationship
You thought sobriety would change everything. I know I did...That once they stopped drinking… you’d finally feel better.More relaxed.More connected.Less on edge.But what happens when sobriety comes… and your relationship still doesn’t feel right?In this episode of The Part No One Talks About series, we’re talking about something that can feel confronting—but incredibly important to understand:Sobriety doesn’t automatically fix a relationship.Because while it might remove the chaos… it doesn’t undo the impact.What we are talking about in this episodeWhy sobriety doesn’t automatically rebuild trustThe difference between stopping the behaviour and repairing the relationshipWhy you might still feel disconnected, guarded, or unsureHow survival mode patterns can continue even after things improveWhat actually needs to happen for a relationship to move forwardBecause...You can want something for so long… and finally get it…And still feel like something isn’t quite right.That doesn’t make you ungrateful. And it doesn’t mean something is wrong with you.It means there’s more work to be done than just sobriety.If you’re in that in-between space… where things are “better”… but not actually good…And you’re thinking:“I don’t want another year feeling like this…”I’ve created a live workshop for you:“How to Live This Year Differently: Whether your loved one is sober or not”It’s about steadying you.Inside, we’ll focus on:Feeling less reactive and more groundedSupporting yourself without burning outCreating small but powerful shifts that change your day-to-dayBecause when you’re steady?Everything changes.👉 Reserve your spotOr DM me “WORKSHOP” on Instagram and I’ll send it to you.This workshop is for spouses navigating addiction or sobriety at any stage.You will leave with practical tools to:• Reduce reactivity• Calm your nervous system• Stop living on edge• Support your loved one without abandoning yourselfIf this episode resonated, don’t wait.👉 Register here You deserve steadiness.Listen to the seriesThis episode is part of The Part No One Talks About series.If this is your first time here, start from the beginning:Episode 80: This Isn’t Just StressEpisode 82: How It Impacts Your Ability to ParentEpisode 83: You Look Fine… But You’re NotEpisode 84: He’s Sober… So Why Don’t You Feel Better?Let's connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
88
84 - The Part No One Talks About Series: When Sobriety Isn’t What You Expected
You thought sobriety would change everything.That once they stopped drinking… you’d finally feel better.More relaxed.More connected.Less on edge.But what happens when that moment comes… and you still don’t feel okay?In this episode of The Part No One Talks About series, we’re talking about something that can feel incredibly confusing:When sobriety isn’t the relief you expected.Because while things might look better on paper…Inside, you might still feel:On edgeHyper-awareLike you’re waiting for something to go wrongUnable to fully relaxAnd no one really prepares you for that.🎧 In this episode, we cover:Why sobriety doesn’t automatically create calm for youThe difference between sobriety and recoveryWhy your nervous system doesn’t “switch off” overnightWhat happens when your wellbeing is tied to their behaviourWhy you might still be showing up in survival modeThe hidden impact of years of unpredictability, stress and bracingBecause Honestly...You can be in a better situation…and still not feel okay.And that doesn’t mean something is wrong with you.It means you’ve been carrying a lot.If this resonates…If you’re sitting there thinking:“I don’t want to do another year feeling like this…”I’ve created a live workshop for you:“How to Live This Year Differently: Whether your loved one is sober or not”It’s about steadying you.Inside, we’ll focus on:Feeling less reactive and more groundedSupporting yourself without burning outCreating small but powerful shifts that change your day-to-dayBecause when you’re steady?Everything changes.👉 Reserve your spotOr DM me “WORKSHOP” on Instagram and I’ll send it to you.This workshop is for spouses navigating addiction or sobriety at any stage.You will leave with practical tools to:• Reduce reactivity• Calm your nervous system• Stop living on edge• Support your loved one without abandoning yourselfIf this episode resonated, don’t wait.👉 Register here You deserve steadiness.Let's connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
87
83 - The Part No One Talks About Series: You Look Fine… But You’re Not
In this episode of The Part No One Talks About series, we’re diving into the invisible impact of loving someone with addiction.Because while addiction can be loud…The impact on you is often silent.This episode is for the ones who:Look like they’re holding it all togetherBut feel like they’re bracing every single dayAnd wonder why they’re so exhausted… even when nothing “looks wrong”What we talk aboutWhy the impact on partners and family members is often invisibleThe emotional weight of “looking fine” when you’re notThe constant mental load (the 2am thoughts, the what-ifs, the rehearsing)Why you might be cancelling plans or pulling away from peopleThe grief no one sees, for your life, your relationship, and what could have beenWhy this isn’t something you just “push through”Just because it’s invisibledoesn’t mean it’s not heavy.And just because you’re coping…doesn’t mean you’re okay.💛 A gentle invitationIf you’re tired of feeling like you’re bracing all the time…And you’re ready to feel even just a little more steady this year.I’ve created a live workshop:“How to Live This Year Differently: Whether your loved one is sober or not”This isn’t about fixing them.It’s about steadying you.Inside, we’ll focus on:Feeling less reactive and more groundedSupporting yourself without burning outCreating small but powerful shifts that change your day-to-dayBecause when you’re steady?Everything changes.👉 Reserve your spotOr DM me “WORKSHOP” on Instagram and I’ll send it to you.This workshop is for spouses navigating addiction or sobriety at any stage.You will leave with practical tools to:• Reduce reactivity• Calm your nervous system• Stop living on edge• Support your loved one without abandoning yourselfIf this episode resonated, don’t wait.👉 Register here You deserve steadiness.Let's connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
86
82 - The Part No One Talks About Series: How it impacts your ability to parent
This is the part no one talks about.Not the addiction itself.Not your loved one.But you. The spouse, the one without the addiction.In this episode, we’re diving into the hidden impact addiction has on your parenting. The snapping, the numbness, the overwhelm… and the quiet guilt that follows.Because here’s the truth, It’s not that you’re an impatient parent.It’s that you’re running on empty and have no capacity.If you’ve ever:Snapped at your kids and thought “that wasn’t about them…”Felt physically present but mentally somewhere elseWondered why you’re reacting bigger than the momentThis episode is for you.Your kids don’t remember everything… But they remember how they felt.And when you’re stuck in survival mode?That shows up.Not because you’re a bad parent, but because you’ve been carrying too much for too long.What I am talking about…Why it’s not about patience, it’s about capacityHow loving someone with addiction impacts your nervous system + parentingThe invisible mental load you’re carrying (even if you don’t have the addiction)Why you feel like you’re “losing it”… and what’s actually going on underneathThe small (but powerful) shift that can change how you show up for your kidsIf you are Ready to Do This Year Differently?If you’re tired of feeling:On edgeOverwhelmedLike you’re just survivingI’ve created something for you.Workshop: “How to Live This Year Differently - Whether Your Loved One Is Sober or Not”This is NOT about fixing them.This is about helping you get steady.Because when you’re steady?Everything changes.👉 Reserve your spotOr DM me “WORKSHOP” on Instagram and I’ll send it to you.This workshop is for spouses navigating addiction or sobriety at any stage.You will leave with practical tools to:• Reduce reactivity• Calm your nervous system• Stop living on edge• Support your loved one without abandoning yourselfIf this episode resonated, don’t wait.👉 Register here You deserve steadiness.Let's connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
85
81 - A Personal Update: Grief, Losing My Voice, and Why I’m Here
This episode is a little different.I wanted to sit down and share a personal update, what’s been happening behind the scenes for me, why I went quiet for a while, and what I’ve been navigating over the past few months.Just before Christmas, I received some devastating news. A dear friend of mine, Jack Nagel, passed away suddenly.This episode is me trying to put words to that experience.The grief, the shock, the strange loneliness of grief when you lose someone you didn’t share “people” with… and how it, to be honest, completely stopped me in my tracks.I found myself quietly paralysed and questioning everything.My voice.My work.Whether anything I was saying even mattered.This grief felt so familiar in a way, yet so different. That grief where it just feels so heavy, where you’re quietly carrying something that no one else can really see or understand.👉 If you need support:My DMs are always open on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
84
80 - The Part No One Talks About Series: This Isn’t Just Stress. It’s the Impact of Addiction.
You might be telling yourself you’re just stressed.It’s January.It's school holidays.It’s work.It’s parenting.It’s just a busy season.But if you love someone struggling with alcoholism or addiction in your family or relationship, what you’re feeling might not be “just stress.”It might be survival mode.In this episode of "The Part No One Talks About" mini-series, I talk about:• Why you’re constantly bracing• The scanning, anticipating and replaying• The emotional load you’re carrying• How we minimise the impact on ourselves• Why “trying harder” isn’t the solutionIf you are exhausted, reactive, at capacity, snapping at your kids over Play-Doh… this conversation is for you.Because you don’t need more patience.You need steadiness.And that’s exactly what we’ll be working on inside the live workshop:How To Live This Year DifferentlyFebruary 24/25 This workshop is for spouses and families navigating addiction or sobriety at any stage.You will leave with practical tools to: • Reduce reactivity • Calm your nervous system • Stop living on edge • Support your loved one without abandoning yourselfIf this episode resonated, don’t wait.👉 Join us here: Reserve your spotCan't make it live? Register for the workshop and you'll get the replay in your inbox shortly afterwards.You deserve steadiness.Let's connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
83
79 - "I Can’t Do Another Year Like This” When You’re Exhausted Living with Addiction
You’re tired. I know you are. Not just “busy” tired.Not just “it’s been a long week” tired.You are life + Addiction tired.You’re exhausted from holding everything together, for everyone, for years.If you’re living alongside addiction, whether your loved one is in active addiction, early sobriety, or years into recovery, and you feel like you’re walking on eggshells, holding your breath and constantly bracing… this episode is for you.In this conversation, we talk about:The hidden toll of hypervigilance and over-functioningWhy sobriety alone doesn’t automatically make your life feel betterThe trap of “I’ll feel better when…”How survival mode becomes your defaultWhat last year actually cost youAnd the question most people are too scared to ask themselves:Is this good enough?If you’ve caught yourself thinking,“I can’t do another year like this…” but you don’t want pressure, ultimatums, or someone telling you what to do…This episode is your pause.Because your life does not have to stay on hold while you wait for someone else to change.💛 The WorkshopOn February 24th/25th, I’m hosting a private workshop:How to Live This Year Differently ( Whether Your Loved One Is Sober or Not)This isn’t about fixing anyone.It’s not about confrontation.It’s not about making big, scary decisions.It’s a space to:BreatheReflect on what last year took from youGently identify what needs to shiftTake back responsibility for your own steadiness and wellbeingYou don’t need a plan.You don’t need your ducks in a row.You just need a little space.If you know you can’t do another year on addiction autopilot…👉 Join us here: Reserve your spotCan't make it live? Register for the workshop and you'll get the replay in your inbox shortly afterwards.Let's connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
82
78 - Acknowledging the Year You’ve Survived
If you’ve spent the past year holding everything together while your loved one's addiction has chipped away at your energy, your hope, and your sense of self, this episode is for you.In this raw, honest conversation, we look back at the year you’ve survived.Not minimising it.Not pretending it was “fine.”Not brushing it off because “it used to be worse.”This episode gently and truthfully names what you’ve been carrying:• The constant tension in the home• The emotional load of parenting alone• The hypervigilance that has become your second skin• The grief for the relationship you hoped for• The exhaustion of managing everyone’s feelings but your own• The loneliness of knowing most people will never understand this lifeYou are not dramatic.You are not “overreacting.”You are a human who has been living in survival mode for far too long.Resources and support:1️⃣ If you already know you cannot do another year like this one, the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness is now open. This is my signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction, with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here2️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
81
77 - Holiday Series: Why Your Christmas Doesn’t Depend on Their Sobriety
Part 6 of the Holiday SeriesIf you’ve lived through more than one chaotic December, you’ve probably told yourself:“Christmas will only be okay if he’s sober.”“Maybe this year will be different… if he sticks to what he promised.”In this bonus episode of the Holiday Series, I am sharing the part nobody really tells spouses and families of someone struggling with addiction:Your experience of Christmas doesn’t actually depend on whether they drinks, use, shows up on time, or follow through on promises.It depends on you having a plan, support and steadiness in yourself.I talk about...Why most people here quietly assume “this is just how December is now” …and how that belief keeps you stuck repeating the same painful holiday patterns, year after year.I share stories from past clients and how they went into Christmas with a plan, even while their partner’s drinking/drug use was unpredictable. and what actually changed for them and their kids.The hidden cost of “I’ll just handle it” and why white-knuckling your way through the holidays leaves you depleted, resentful and running on fumes by New Year’s.How to shifting from “waiting for them to be better” to “I’m allowed to create calm, clarity and moments of joy independent of what they do.”What realistic hope looks like when you’re the safe parent, and howow to hold both: grief for what you wish your family could be and hope that your holidays can feel different from the inside out.If this episode feels like it’s narrating your life, you’re not broken, dramatic or asking for too much.You’re exhausted from carrying far more than anyone can see, and you deserve support, too.And your holiday experience can be different (even if nothing changes on their end)🎄 JOIN THE FREE HOLIDAY SURVIVAL GUIDE WORKSHOPThis is where we turn understanding into a plan.Inside, you’ll learn real tools to navigate this season:💛 Grounding strategies for chaotic moments💛 Scripts for difficult family conversations💛 How to reduce conflict without walking on eggshells💛 Boundaries that actually protect your peace💛 A plan for unpredictable moments💛 Permission (and support) to prioritise YOUYou deserve a holiday that doesn’t depend on which “version” of Them shows up.👉 Save your free seat here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
80
76 - Holiday Series: What I Wish Someone Told Me Before Every Christmas
Part 5 of the Holiday SeriesThis episode is the deep breath you didn’t know you needed.If you’re heading into December telling yourself, “I’ll be fine… I’ve done this before… I can handle it,” this one is for you.Because the truth is:✨ You have handled too much.✨ Your body is bracing, even if you’re pretending you’re okay.✨ And you absolutely do not have to repeat another year of emotional roulette.In this episode, Amanda gently walks you through:The real reason your chest tightens as the holiday approachesWhy familiarity doesn’t equal healthyHow your nervous system remembers what your mind is trying to downplayThe physical cost of carrying someone else’s addiction for too longWhy “being the strong one” is quietly burning you outWhat needs to shift before the chaos of the season beginsWhy emotional preparation matters more than holiday plans, menus, or logisticsHow to move out of survival mode and into something steadierThis is your permission slip to stop white-knuckling your way through December.It’s the reminder you didn’t know you needed:You are not meant to just “handle” the holidaysYou are meant to be supported, grounded, and well.And your holiday experience can be different (even if nothing changes on their end)🎄 JOIN THE FREE HOLIDAY SURVIVAL GUIDE WORKSHOPThis is where we turn understanding into a plan.Inside, you’ll learn real tools to navigate this season:💛 Grounding strategies for chaotic moments💛 Scripts for difficult family conversations💛 How to reduce conflict without walking on eggshells💛 Boundaries that actually protect your peace💛 A plan for unpredictable moments💛 Permission (and support) to prioritise YOUYou deserve a holiday that doesn’t depend on which “version” of Them shows up.👉 Save your free seat here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
79
75 - Holiday Series: Three Things You Can Control This Season
Part 4 of the Holiday Mini-SeriesWhen your loved one's drinking, substance use, sobriety or recovery feels unpredictable, it can start to feel like everything is out of your hands, the mood, the energy in the house, whether plans go ahead or blow up, whether Christmas feels magical or like a minefield.This episode is for the lovely person who feels like they are bracing 24/7, waiting for the next wobble, the next mood shift, the next disappointment… and quietly wondering:“What’s even in my control anymore?”In this episode, I'm walking you through the three powerful things you can control, even in the messy middle of addiction and recovery -✨ Your preparation✨ Your level of engagement✨ Your meaning-makingBecause while you can’t control whether they use/don't use, wobble/relapses, turns up late, or arrives in a mood…. you can control how prepared you are, how much of it you pick up, and how you talk to yourself about what’s happening.Those three things alone can change how this season feels for you and your kids.And if this feels painfully familiar, please don’t navigate December alone.🎄 JOIN THE FREE HOLIDAY SURVIVAL GUIDE WORKSHOPThis is where we turn understanding into a plan.Inside, you’ll learn real tools to navigate this season:💛 Grounding strategies for chaotic moments💛 Scripts for difficult family conversations💛 How to reduce conflict without walking on eggshells💛 Boundaries that actually protect your peace💛 A plan for unpredictable moments💛 Permission (and support) to prioritise YOUYou deserve a holiday that doesn’t depend on which “version” of Them shows up.👉 Save your free seat here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
78
74 - Holiday Series: The Hidden Exhaustion of Loving Someone in Addiction
Part 3 of the Holiday Mini-SeriesThis episode dives into something most people will never understand unless they’ve lived it:You aren’t just planning Christmas.You’re planning Christmas around a loved ones addiction.While the rest of the world is thinking menus, Secret Santa, outfits and photos… you’re quietly assessing risk, predicting behaviour, managing expectations, rehearsing backup plans, and carrying the emotional safety of the entire household on your shoulders.This episode is for the spouses, families, and women in addiction-impacted relationships who are:✨ Preparing for disappointment before it happens✨ Making last-minute plans because nothing feels predictable✨ Rehearsing excuses and half-truths to cover what’s really going on✨ Managing the dread of “Will they show up? And in what state?”✨ Navigating the heartbreak of an empty seat at the table✨ Carrying grief while trying to create magic for your kids✨ Exhausted from holding it together all year, and then even more in DecemberThis isn’t “holiday stress.”This is emotional project management at an Olympic level, all happening behind the scenes and all while pretending everything is normal.And if this feels painfully familiar, please don’t navigate December alone.🎄 JOIN THE FREE HOLIDAY SURVIVAL GUIDE WORKSHOPThis is where we turn understanding into a plan.Inside, you’ll learn real tools to navigate this season:💛 Grounding strategies for chaotic moments💛 Scripts for difficult family conversations💛 How to reduce conflict without walking on eggshells💛 Boundaries that actually protect your peace💛 A plan for unpredictable moments💛 Permission (and support) to prioritise YOUYou deserve a holiday that doesn’t depend on which “version” of Them shows up.👉 Save your free seat here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
77
73 - Holiday Series: The Dread of Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde
A special Holiday Series Episode 2 of 5If you wake up already bracing yourself… wondering which “version” of your loved one you’ll get today, this episode will feel like someone finally naming the thing you’ve been silently living.This is the emotional whiplash of loving someone whose drinking, drug use or behaviour shifts without warning.And during the holidays?It hits even harder.In this episode, we unpack:✨ Why the unpredictability of his behaviour trains your nervous system into survival mode✨ How your body knows before your mind does✨ The mental rehearsing, planning, and exit strategies you make without noticing✨ The dread not just of his behaviour — but of your own reactions✨ The resentment, the spirals, the shame, the anger you don’t talk about✨ Why the real cost of addiction in a family is losing access to the best version of YOU✨ And the shift that gives you back your power this seasonThis episode is equal parts validation and empowerment, grounded in lived experience, clinical understanding, and the reality you’re navigating behind the scenes.🎄 JOIN THE FREE HOLIDAY SURVIVAL GUIDE WORKSHOPThis is where we turn understanding into a plan.Inside, you’ll learn real tools to navigate this season:💛 Grounding strategies for chaotic moments💛 Scripts for difficult family conversations💛 How to reduce conflict without walking on eggshells💛 Boundaries that actually protect your peace💛 A plan for unpredictable moments💛 Permission (and support) to prioritise YOUYou deserve a holiday that doesn’t depend on which “version” of Them shows up.👉 Save your free seat here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
76
72 - Holiday Series: When Everyone Thinks You’re Fine - But You’re Not
Today’s episode kicks off a special 5-part holiday series created for spouses and families whose Christmas looks nothing like the picture-perfect scenes on social media or in the Hallmark Movies.If your loved one’s drinking or addiction makes the season feel unpredictable…If everyone assumes you’re fine…If you’re holding the entire holiday together while silently bracing for chaos…This episode is for you.I’m sharing the emotional load no one sees, the invisible planning you do, and the heartbreaking uncertainty you carry into every December. You’re not imagining it, and you’re not alone.🎄 Workshop: Holiday Survival Guide - How to navigate your loved ones addiction through the Holiday’sStay Grounded, Reduce Conflict, and Enjoy the Season — Even If Their Behaviour Is UnpredictableIf the holidays already feel heavy, unpredictable, or lonely because of your partner’s behaviour, please join me for this free live workshop.You’ll learn practical tools, scripts, grounding strategies, and a simple plan to help you stay steady, reduce conflict, and protect your peace, no matter what they do.👉 Save your free seat here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
75
71 - The Moment I Completely Lost It
There’s a moment in every addiction-impacted relationship where you realise… it’s not just their drinking/drug use/gambling etc that’s changing the family, it’s changing you too.You don’t plan for it.You don’t see it coming.And when it happens, the shame of it stays in your chest for years.Today I’m sharing a story I’ve never fully talked about publicly, the moment I completely lost it, the moment my kids were scared of me, not their dad, and the moment I realised that addiction had changed me in ways that were unimaginable and I could no longer ignore.If you’ve ever snapped, yelled, bellowed, broken something, stormed out, or reacted in ways you’re not proud of… please hear me:you’re not a bad mother/father, a bad partner, or a bad person, you’re a human being in survival mode, and you're at your breaking point.In this deeply personal episode, I talk about:The moment I “broke” and how my kids carried that memoryWhy your anger, snapping, and hypervigilance make total sense in survival modeHow addiction slowly reshapes the “safe parent” without you realisingWhy getting support for you is the difference between coping and crashingThis isn’t an episode about blame or shame, it’s an episode about truth, compassion, and reclaiming yourself after years of walking on eggshells.And if you’re thinking,“I can’t keep living like this…”or“I don’t want my kids remembering me this way…”This episode is for you.And your great 2026 begins with one small step today. not in January, and not after the next crisis.Listen next:Ep 66 - They Say They're Sober... But You're Still Not Sure.Ep 3 - Where Is My Lasagne? Ep 47 - 11 Subtle Signs Your Partner’s Addiction Is Controlling Your LifeEp 35 - When You're Scared to Set the Boundary... Start Here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
74
70 - When You Don't Like Who You've Become In Their Addiction
Have you ever looked at yourself and thought… “I don’t even recognise who I am anymore?”If so, this episode will feel like someone finally turned the lights on in a dark room you’ve been sitting in for years.When you love someone whose drinking or using creates chaos, unpredictability or emotional instability, it doesn’t just change them.It slowly, quietly, painfully changes you too.And one day you wake up snapping at your kids, checking his phone, scanning for signs of drinking, living in fear not love… and you realise:“This isn’t the mother, partner, or woman I wanted to be.”This episode is for you if you’ve ever thought:“I don’t like who I’ve become.”“I feel angry all the time.”“My whole life feels blurry.”“I’m doing everything alone.”“He’s changing… but I still feel stuck.”“I’ve lost myself somewhere in all this.”You are not broken.You are overwhelmed.And you don’t have to stay this version of yourself.💬 If this episode feels like I’m reading your diary… you deserve support too.A good 2026 starts now, not after the next crisis, not in January, and not when things magically get better.Listen next:Ep 66 - They Say They're Sober... But You're Still Not Sure.Ep 41 - The One Question Not to Ask Someone Struggling With AddictionEp 47 - 11 Subtle Signs Your Partner’s Addiction Is Controlling Your LifeEp 35 - When You're Scared to Set the Boundary... Start Here👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
73
69 - If Nothing Changes, Nothing Changes: How to Start Turning Your Life Around Now
What if the change you’ve been waiting for has nothing to do with your loved one and everything to do with you?If your partner’s addiction has taken over your life, it’s easy to slip into survival mode: waiting for the next crisis, hoping this time things will magically improve, telling yourself you’ll feel better once they finally change.But here’s the truth: nothing changes if nothing changes. And in addiction-impacted relationships, things rarely stay the same. They usually get worse.In Part 2 of this two-part series, Amanda walks you through what actually creates real, sustainable change for you, your loved one, and your relationship. No fluff. No false promises. Just grounded, compassionate, practical tools you can use immediately.You’ll learn:✨ What truly motivates change (and why shame never does)✨ How to make the truth safe again✨ Why boundaries create change (and control doesn’t✨ The micro-moments that rebuild trust and momentumAnd because we’re in November? A calmer, clearer, stronger 2026 starts now, not in January, not after another crisis.If you’ve been walking on eggshells, waiting for ‘rock bottom’ to wake someone up… this episode will show you why you don’t have to wait anymore, and how you can start leading meaningful change today.Ready for your next step?Book a friendly, no-pressure chat to talk through your next small, best step toward peace. Because a good 2026 starts now, not “one day.”👉 Click here to find a time or send me a DM on Instagram@addictionmakesthreeto share what’s feeling hardest right now.Listen next:Ep 41 - The One Question Not to Ask Someone Struggling With AddictionEp 47 - 11 Subtle Signs Your Partner’s Addiction Is Controlling Your LifeEp 35 - When You're Scared to Set the Boundary... Start HereEp 66 - They Say They're Sober... But You're Still Not Sure.👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone.👉 Click here to find a time2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
72
68 - Why Waiting for Rock Bottom Is Dangerous
You’ve probably heard it a thousand times, “they just need to hit rock bottom.” But what if that’s the very idea keeping you both stuck?When someone you love is struggling with addiction, it’s easy to believe that “rock bottom” is what will finally make them change. We’ve been told it by friends, family, even therapists, that things have to get bad enough before they get better.But here’s the truth: addiction is doing something despite the negative consequences, which means waiting for more pain doesn’t motivate change, it fuels the cycle.In this episode, Amanda unpacks:What addiction really is (and why it isn’t about bad choices or willpower)Why the “rock bottom” story keeps both you and your loved one stuckHow waiting quietly teaches you to abandon yourselfWhat actually creates motivation for change (hint: it’s hope and safety, not shame)How to start building the “safety scaffolding” that makes recovery possible before a crisisIf you’ve been walking on eggshells, waiting for the next disaster — this conversation is your permission slip to stop waiting and start leading change from a place of calm, clarity, and strength.Ready for your next step?Book a friendly, no-pressure chat to talk through your next small, best step toward peace. Because a good 2026 starts now, not “one day.” 👉 Click here to find a time or send me a DM on Instagram@addictionmakesthreeto share what’s feeling hardest right now.Listen next:Ep 41 - The One Question Not to Ask Someone Struggling With AddictionEp 53 - Are you Gaslighting Yourself? The Quiet Habit Keeping you StuckEp 6 - Painful thought #1 - Why are they choosing a substance over me?Ep 47 - 11 Subtle Signs Your Partner’s Addiction Is Controlling Your Life👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Book a Friendly Chat: Explore what working together could look like because you’ve been trying “this way” long enough, and it’s not helping anyone. 👉 Click here to find a time 2️⃣ Join the Pathway to Wellness Waitlist: My signature program helps you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction — with calm, confidence, and community👉 Join the waitlist here3️⃣ Download the Free Crisis Conversation Guide: Learn what to say (and what not to say) when addiction takes over, with real scripts that help you stay grounded even when it’s messy.👉 Get the Free Guide4️⃣ Connect on Instagram: @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections? 💌 [email protected] Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
71
67 - How to Rebuild Trust Without Turning Into a Detective
If your loved one says they’re sober but part of you still isn’t sure, this episode is for you.After living through lies, gaslighting, and constant second-guessing, rebuilding trust can feel impossible. You want to believe them. You want your relationship to work. But you’re also exhausted from checking, doubting, and playing detective.In this episode, Addiction Relationship Coach Amanda Lockyer explains what rebuilding trust really looks like after addiction, without losing yourself in the process. YWhat We Talk AboutWhy “you just have to trust me” doesn’t work after addictionThe first (and most important) step: rebuilding trust with yourselfHow to use boundaries and clarity, not control, to feel safeWhat to do in the “messy middle” when things are better, but not good yetWhy noticing when words and actions align is the key to lasting trustHow to support recovery without turning into the sobriety policeFor Listeners Who Are In the “Messy Middle”If you’re trying to stop living in detective mode, but you don’t know what to do next, you don’t have to figure it out alone.👉 Book a friendly chat to talk through your next small, best step forward in peace - Click here to find a timeOr, if you’d prefer, send me a DM on Instagram @addictionmakesthree and we can talk through what’s feeling hardest right now.Listen next:Ep 35 - When You're Scared to Set the Boundary, Start Here.Ep 53 - Are you Gaslighting Yourself? The Quiet Habbit Keeping you StuckEp 65 - What no one warns you about when they go to rehabEp 28 - Your Unexpected Resentment in Their Recovery💌 Need support for yourself (not just your loved one)? Book in a no-pressure chat with Amanda to share what's going on and find out what your next best smallest steps are, or join the waitlist for the next intake to the Pathway to Wellness Program.👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ You can book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like. Because you know you’ve been trying ‘this way’ for long enough and it's not helping anyone.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible2️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
70
66 - They Say They’re Sober… But You’re Still Not Sure
When your loved one says they’re sober but you still smell alcohol, feel uneasy, or can’t shake that gut feeling, you’re not crazy.In this episode, I unpack what happens after the lies, after rehab, and after the chaos settles.I explain why it’s so hard to feel calm, how broken trust shows up in your body, and why believing yourself is the first step toward healing, not policing your partner.You’ll LearnWhy trust doesn’t return the moment sobriety startsThe trauma response behind hyper-vigilance and “detective mode”What your nervous system is really doing when you can’t relaxHow to begin rebuilding trust with yourself firstWhy “just trust me” never works, and what to say insteadListen next:Ep 14 - The Power of the PauseEp 53 - Are you Gaslighting Yourself? The Quiet Habbit Keeping you StuckEp 65 - What no one warns you about when they go to rehabEp 28 - Your Unexpected Resentment in Their Recovery💌 Need support for yourself (not just your loved one)? Book in a no-pressure chat with Amanda to share what's going on and find out what your next best smallest steps are, or join the waitlist for the next intake to the Pathway to Wellness Program.👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ You can book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like. Because you know you’ve been trying ‘this way’ for long enough and it's not helping anyone.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible2️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
69
65 - What No One Warns You About When They Go To Rehab
Everyone says, “They just need to go to rehab.”And maybe they do.But no one talks about what happens to the person left at home once they finally do.In this honest episode, Addiction Relationship Coach Amanda Lockyer shares what really happens on the other side of rehab. The emotional whiplash, the relief mixed with resentment, and why it’s completely normal to feel angry, confused, or even jealous while your loved one gets help.You’ll learn:• Why relief often turns into resentment (and what it’s telling you)• How to stop waiting for their recovery to fix everything• What your own recovery and support can look like independent of theirsRehab isn’t the finish line. It’s the start of two recoveries, theirs and yours.Ask yourself: What support do I need right now, for me?🎧 Listen now, and explore your next steps and resources in the show notes.Listen next:Ep 28 - Your unexpected resentment in Their recoveryEp 18 - Rehab from the other side - Part 3Ep 17 - Rehab from the other side - Part 2Ep 16 - Rehab from the other side - Part 1👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like. Because you know you’ve been trying ‘this way’ for long enough and it's not helping anyone.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible2️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
68
64 - When You’re Worn Out: Giving Yourself Permission to Stop
When you’re the one holding everything together, the house, the kids, the finances, the emotional whiplash and fallout, it’s no wonder you’re exhausted.Loving someone who struggles with alcohol or drugs can quickly take over your life. You keep going because stopping feels dangerous, like everything might collapse if you let go for a second.In this episode, Amanda shares what “the pause” really means when you’re run-down and stretched thin, and why it’s necessary for everyone’s wellbeing for you to pause. You’ll learn how to notice the crappy internal thoughts that keep you stuck, how to ask for help without guilt, and why rest isn’t a luxury, it’s maintenance.I know it’s hard here and you’re beyond tired. Take that micro moment and have a rest. It’ll help more than you could ever imagineListen next:Ep 14 - The Power of The PauseEp 55 - 7 Late Night Google Searches That Reveal Addiction Red FlagsEp 54 - What Real Support Looks Like (Without the Shame of Enabling)Ep 33 - You're not Their Rehab👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like. Because you know you’ve been trying ‘this way’ for long enough and it's not helping anyone.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible2️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
67
63 - How Perimenopause Makes Addiction-Impacted Relationships Even Harder
Navigating perimenopause while living with a spouse struggling with addiction can feel like too much. Because it is, in fact, too much. In this episode, Amanda shares why these two experiences collide, how it impacts your emotions and nervous system, and what real support looks like so you can start feeling calm and in control againIf you’re navigating perimenopause while also living with a partner who’s struggling with addiction, you are not imagining how hard this feels, it’s a lot.Your hormones are shifting. Your sleep’s all over the place. Your emotions are on high alert. And when you layer in the stress, uncertainty, and heartbreak that comes with addiction in a relationship, it can feel impossible to stay calm, steady, or even like yourself anymore.In this episode, I’m unpacking what happens when perimenopause, stress, and addiction in a relationship collide, the perfect storm of emotional overload, fatigue, and burnout that so many women find themselves in but rarely talk about.We’ll chat about:Why perimenopause makes emotional regulation so much harder when addiction is involvedHow your nervous system gets stuck in “fight or flight” modeThe hidden compassion we can find in those small moments of resistance (yes, even over coffee)And what it really takes to start feeling calm, in control, and well again — no matter where your loved one is in their recoveryYour ability to find your peace, even when things around you are chaotic is going to be what helps you. And when you're better in yourself, you can support your loved one in a healthy way.Listen next:Ep 14 - The Power of The PauseEp 5 - What About UsEp 15 - What got you here won't get you thereEp 20 - You’ll achieve more in 1 year focusing on your own wellbeing...👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible2️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
66
62 - Rethinking Recovery and the Myths That Keep Us Stuck with Conrad Tracy
What if the stories we’ve been told about addiction recovery, rock bottom, tough love, they have to want it themselves... are only half the truth?In this episode, Amanda sits down with Conrad Tracey, founder of Addiction Coaching Australia, to unpack the outdated myths that keep people stuck, and reveal what real, sustainable recovery actually looks like.Together they explore the messy middle of change, the space between crisis and consistency, and how both the person struggling and their loved ones can find steadier ground through boundaries, compassion, and evidence-based support.You’ll learn:Why waiting for rock bottom can be dangerous and what to do instead.The difference between helping and enabling (and why it matters).How relapse fits into recovery without meaning “back to day one.”What real accountability looks like without shame or control.How small, consistent actions create lasting transformation.This episode is for you if:You love someone navigating addiction or early recovery.You’re a high-functioning person quietly struggling yourself.You’re tired of outdated advice and want tools that actually work.Connect with ConradAddiction Coaching Australia@conradmtracey_addictioncoach on InstagramWe are running a promotion for listeners of the podcast of a special introduction price to our Circuit Breaker program $97 per week ex GST for the first three months, rather than usual $149 per week ex GST.Just use the code SOBER at the check out.https://pages.addictioncoachingaustralia.com.au/the-circuit-breaker👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.2️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
65
61 - When You Don’t Know Whether to Stay or Leave
You love them and you’re exhausted.One day there’s hope, the next there’s heartbreak.And the question won’t stop circling your mind: Should I stay, or should I leave?In this episode, Amanda helps you step off the exhausting mental treadmill of “what ifs” and find solid ground again.You’ll learn:Why both staying and leaving are hardThe real question you need to ask insteadHow doing your own inner work is the key to clarityWhether your partner is in active addiction, early recovery, or somewhere in between, this conversation will help you stop waiting for a sign, start choosing you and get you stepping closer to making decisions that feel good, even when they are hard.Listen next:Ep 42 - How many chances is too many?Ep 27 - Should you Leave or Stay? Why that's not the Only QuestionEp 23 - How to get through a relapse without losing hope👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.2️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
64
60 - Grieving Someone in Addiction Who is Still Alive
What if you’re grieving someone who’s still alive?In this episode, Amanda explains living grief, the hidden heartbreak of loving someone in addiction. Learn why it feels confusing, how grief shows up in your body, and gentle ways to begin healing without losing yourself.It’s the tension between hope and heartbreak.Between who they were and who they are now.You can love them and still grieve them.You can hold hope and still hold boundaries.Listen next:Ep 47 - 11 Subtle Signs Your Partner’s Addiction Is Controlling Your LifeEp 3 - Where is my lasagne?Ep 20 - You’ll achieve more in 1 year focusing on your own wellbeing...👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.2️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible3️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide4️⃣ Connect with Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree5️⃣ Questions or reflections → [email protected] can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
63
59 - The Crazy Things I Did In My Husband's Addiction
You’ve sniffed laundry, counted bottles, checked phones, screenshotted bank statements.Me too.You’re not crazy, you’re trying your best to cope the only way you know how.In this episode, I unveil my long list of whack and unhinged behaviour and unpack why the “detective mode” makes sense and why it’s quietly breaking you, and how to step out of it with compassion.You’ll learn:The gaslighting → doubt → evidence-hunt loop (and why it’s addictive)Why hyper-vigilance feels like control but creates burnoutA kinder swap: put down the magnifying glass, pick up the mirrorOne tiny action to retire (today) + what to do insteadIf you’ve been living on high alert, this is your permission slip to choose peace over proof.And truly - send me a DM on Instagram or drop me an email - let me know the one thing you are going to 'stop' doing... and let's get a plan together.Listen next:Ep 53 - Are You Gaslighting Yourself?Ep 57 - 4 Signs Your Boundaries Aren’t WorkingEp 48 - Why Sobriety Isn’t the Finish Line👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide2️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible3️⃣ Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
62
58 - The High-Functioning Addiction Myth: When ‘Fine’ Isn’t Actually Fine
They’ve got a good job.They pay the bills.They make people laugh.So how could this be addiction, right?That’s what we tell ourselves. Until being high-functioning for them starts feeling like being high-alert for you.In this raw and honest episode, Amanda pulls back the curtain on one of the most misleading labels in addiction: “high-functioning.”You’ll learn:Why “holding it all together” can actually be a form of denialThe hidden emotional cost for partners and familiesHow this label gaslights you into doubting what you already knowWhat true wellbeing actually looks like and how to start measuring it differentlyIf you’ve ever thought, “It’s not that bad, they’re still working, they’re still funny, they’re still paying the bills,” this episode will help you see that “fine” isn’t the same as “healthy.”🎧 Listen now to learn how to stop minimising, start trusting yourself, and take the first step towards real steadiness and peace.👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Join Boundaries workshop - Boundaries That Build Connection & Protect Your Peace: Why They Matter, What Works, & How to Set Them Without Guilt. Happening on Thursday 9th October - 4pm PDT / 7pm EDT - sign up here2️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide3️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible4️⃣ Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
61
57 - Why Your Boundaries Aren’t Working (and What to Do About It)
Are you overwhelmed, resentful, or carrying everyone else’s chaos? Those are not personality traits, they’re signs you need new boundaries.In this episode, you’ll learn:4 common signs it’s time to set new or better boundaries.Why resentment is your body’s boundary alarm.How over-functioning and people-pleasing (tendencies) keep you stuck.The heartbreaking cost of neglecting yourself.How boundaries help you separate what’s yours from what’s theirs.If this episode resonated, join me for my upcoming Boundaries Workshop. Let’s protect your peace and step forwards in a healthy way, together - without the confusion and self doubt.👉 Other Episodes MentionedEp14 - The Power of the PauseEp30 - Why boundaries matter way more than we think👉 Resources and support:1️⃣ Join Boundaries workshop - Boundaries That Build Connection & Protect Your Peace: Why They Matter, What Works, & How to Set Them Without Guilt. Happening on Thursday 9th October - 4pm PDT / 7pm EDT - sign up here2️⃣ If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide3️⃣ You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible4️⃣ Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
60
56 - How to Spot the Early Signs of Addiction (Before It’s Too Late)
Ever found yourself holding your breath when the front door opens?Or Googling at 2am, ‘Is my partner an alcoholic?’ before deleting the search?You’re not crazy, these are the blurry early signs of addiction. And today, we’re naming a few of them.What you’ll learn in this episode:The subtle early signs of addiction you might be overlooking.Why denial (yours and theirs) keeps you stuck.How behaviours like walking on eggshells or late-night Googling are actually red flags.Why you don’t need a label to validate your experience, it’s enough that it’s a problem for YOU.A gentle reframe: awareness is the first step toward change.If this episode resonated, join me for my upcoming Boundaries Workshop. Let’s protect your peace and step forwards in a healthy way, together. Without the confusion and self doubt.Resources and support:Join Boundaries workshop - Boundaries That Build Connection & Protect Your Peace: Why They Matter, What Works, & How to Set Them Without Guilt. Happening on Thursday 9th October - 4pm PDT / 7pm EDT - sign up hereIf you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guideYou can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possibleOr join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
59
55 - 7 Late-Night Google Searches That Reveal Addiction Red Flags
The middle of the night. The house is quiet. You’re scrolling with the brightness turned down low, Googling questions you never thought you’d type:“Is drinking every night normal?” “Why does he lie about it?” “Am I overreacting?”If that’s you, this episode will feel like an exhale.In this conversation, I dive into:Why those late-night Google searches are already a sign something’s not okayThe subtle ways your body knows before your brain is ready to admit itCommon red-flag searches (and what they really mean)How shame makes us clear the history… and silence ourselvesThe simple reframe that turns “I’m paranoid” into “I’m aware”This isn’t about shaming or blaming. It’s about recognising that if you’re secretly Googling at 2am, something in you already knows it’s time to pay attention.Resources and support:🎓 Grab the Discovery to Recovery workshop - a bitesized 3 part workshop to get grounded and clear on what's going on and your next smallest steps forward: get it hereIf you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guideYou can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possibleOr join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
58
54 - What Real Support Looks Like (Without the Shame of ‘Enabling’)
You’re trying to love someone through addiction and you’re exhausted.Because helping someone you love should feel good… right?In this episode, I go deeper on the conversation from Episode 19 and talk about the confusing, messy, emotionally-charged reality of trying to “help” someone impacted by addiction.You’ll hear:How to tell if your “support” is actually costing you your health, peace, or wellbeingWhy the advice you’re getting from others even well-meaning family might be hurting more than helpingA powerful mindset shift: stop asking “Am I enabling?” and start asking “Is this healthy for me?”Real examples from Amanda and the women inside the Pathway to Wellness program about setting boundaries that are loving and firmA compassionate reminder that you don’t have to break yourself to help someone else healAmanda shares practical, heart-centred questions to help you move from guilt-ridden guesswork… to grounded clarity.This episode is for you if:You’re walking on eggshells around your partner’s addictionYou’ve been told you’re “enabling” and you feel shamed or confusedYou want to help… but not at the expense of your own wellbeing🎧 Subscribe and follow to never miss an episode and please share this with a woman in your life who might need this message today.Let’s Keep Going Together:🎓 Grab the Discovery to Recovery workshop: get it here🎧 Binge other helpful episodes:Episode 19: Debunking the myth of enabling in addictionEpisode 43: Why everyone has opinions (and none of them help)Episode 35: When You’re Scared to Set the Boundary… Start Here📩 DM Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree to share what landedResources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guideYou can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possibleOr join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
57
53 - Are You Gaslighting Yourself? The Quiet Habit Keeping You Stuck
When someone you love struggles with addiction, there’s often a voice in your head that says: “Maybe I’m overreacting.” “Maybe it’s not that bad.” “Maybe I’m the problem.”💥 That, my friend, is self-gaslighting.In this gentle but truth-filled episode, Amanda explores:What gaslighting really is (and what it looks like in your loved one)How gaslighting becomes internalised and turns into your own inner voiceWhy we gaslight ourselves (hint: it’s about survival, not weakness)How this quiet habit keeps us stuck in shame, silence, and confusionWhat it really looks like to stop gaslighting yourself and start trusting yourself againIf you’ve ever second-guessed your reality or felt like you needed “evidence” before trusting your gut then this episode is for you.🎧 Tune in now and come back to this one any time you need a reminder: You're not crazy. You're not imagining things. You're not too sensitive.You're just exhausted from carrying a truth no one else is acknowledging.And that ends today.Let’s Keep Going Together:🎓 Grab the workshop: get it here🎧 Binge previous episodes: What if waiting is the most dangerous choice - 52, Why sobriety isn't the finish line - 48, I'm smart, so why do I feel so stuck - 40📩 DM Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree to share what landedResources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guideYou can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possibleOr join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
56
52 - What If Waiting Is the Most Dangerous Choice?
Are you stuck waiting for your loved one to drink less, admit they have a problem, or finally change?If you’ve been whispering “maybe this is just my lot in life”... this episode is for you.I am getting real about the hidden choices we make every day in addiction-impacted relationships, especially when it feels like we don’t have any choices at all.Inside this episode:The quiet ways women become passengers in their own lifeHow addiction can trick you into feeling powerlessWhy both choices might feel hard, but choosing still mattersWhat it looks like to set boundaries with love (not ultimatums)You’ll also hear the story of one woman who stopped waiting for her partner’s rock bottom and reclaimed her own power instead.BONUS: If you want to start choosing differently but don’t know where to start…I have created a 3 session self-paced workshop for women just like you.👉 It’s called Discovery to Recovery and it’s only $77.Get clarity, calm, and your next small step here: Get the workshop in your pocketLet’s Keep Going Together:🎓 Grab the workshop: get it here🎧 Binge previous episodes on boundaries - 35, how to get through a relapse without losing hope - 23, Why sobriety isn't the finish line - 48📩 DM Amanda on Instagram @addictionmakesthree to share what landedResources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guideYou can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possibleOr join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
55
51 - The Hidden Cost of Staying Quiet About Addiction (Your Silence Is Not Strength)
When you’re living alongside a loved one’s addiction, staying quiet can feel like the safest choice. You tell yourself you’re protecting them, your family, and yourself. You don’t want to make things worse, invite judgement, or fuel the shame that’s already there.But here’s the truth, silence doesn’t always protect you. In fact, it can keep you stuck. And it can keep your loved one stuck, too.In this episode, I share why so many capable, intelligent women wear silence like a badge of honour, the hidden cost of that silence, and what can happen when you start speaking up in safe, supportive spaces. You’ll hear personal reflections, relatable stories, and gentle challenges to help you see your voice as a powerful tool for clarity, healing, and change.Whether you’re in the early days of navigating a partner’s addiction or years into the rollercoaster, this conversation will help you shift from quietly coping to confidently choosing what’s best for you.✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
54
50 - Why You Can’t Find Peace Without Discomfort
You just want peace.Peace in your home. Peace in your relationship. Peace in your body.But here’s the hard truth no one talks about:The real peace?It’s on the other side of discomfort.In this milestone episode, Amanda gets raw and real about what it actually takes to reclaim your voice and protect your peace when you’re in a relationship impacted by addiction.We unpack:Why the “path of least resistance” keeps you stuckWhat happens when you abandon yourself to keep the peaceHow to start flexing your discomfort muscle (without diving straight into deep-end convos)Client stories that show this shift in real lifeAnd how YOU can start choosing the kind of “hard” that leads to healingYou don’t have to blow things up.You don’t have to confront every moment.But you do deserve to stop abandoning your truth.✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
53
49 - Are You Still Getting It All Done But Falling Apart Inside?
You’re holding it all together... the work, the parenting, the appointments, the appearances. But behind closed doors, you’re exhausted, anxious, and quietly crumbling under the weight of your partner’s addiction.In this deeply honest episode, Amanda explores what “not okay” really looks like for high-functioning, capable and amazing women. From over-functioning and emotional whiplash to hiding behind the mask of “I’m fine,” we unpack the silent cost of loving someone in active addiction.Amanda shares her own turning point and why acknowledging your pain (even in a whisper) is the first important step for change. If you’ve been doing everything for everyone and wondering why you feel like you’re breaking… this is your invitation to breathe.Whether you’re in crisis or just quietly breaking, this episode offers truth and relief.🎧 If this resonates, share it with someone who needs to hear: You’re allowed to not be okay and still be amazing and capable.✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
52
48 - Why Sobriety Isn’t the Finish Line: The Truth About Addiction & Relationships
You’ve been holding on hoping that once your partner gets sober, everything will fall back into place. But what happens when that day finally comes… and nothing feels better?In this raw and honest episode on Addiction Makes Three, we unpack the hard truth: sobriety doesn’t magically fix everything. If you’re a high-functioning woman walking on eggshells, exhausted by emotional labour, and silently battling burnout while your partner struggles with addiction or is newly sober this conversation is for you.We explore:Why “destination sobriety” can actually delay your healingHow enabling can wear a clever disguiseWhat it really takes to rebuild trust (with yourself and them)And why setting boundaries is essential, even after sobriety beginsWhether your partner is in active addiction/use, early recovery, or somewhere in-between you deserve clarity, peace, and support now, not “one day.”🎧 Hit play for validation, strategy, and a gentle wake-up call you didn’t know you needed.✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
51
47 - 11 Subtle Signs Your Partner’s Addiction Is Controlling Your Life
If you’re lying awake at night wondering “Is it really that bad?”, “Am I overreacting?”, or “How did I even get here?” this episode is for you.In this powerful and compassionate solo episode, Amanda walks you through 11 subtle but life-altering signs that your partner’s addiction might be quietly taking over your world, emotionally, mentally, and even physically.This is not about blaming or shaming your loved one. It’s about helping you see the truth of what’s happening so you can reclaim your peace, identity, and life without guilt.You’ll hear:What “walking on eggshells” really looks like in a relationship with addictionHow your mood may be tied to theirs (and why it’s exhausting)Why you’ve stopped making plans and stopped laughingThe invisible weight of responsibility and the deep grief of losing yourselfA gentle but powerful reminder: you don’t need to wait for it to get even worse to get supportWhether you tick one box or all eleven, please know this: you’re not dramatic, you’re not overreacting and you’re not alone.For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:Upcoming workshop: Learn how to support your partner without losing yourself in the processThree Essential Steps to support your Loved one in addiction or recovery (Without losing yourself in the process)Happening this week👉 Register HereIf you haven’t got the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guideYou can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
50
46 - Is this addiction or am I overreacting?
Ever caught yourself thinking, “Surely this isn’t happening in my family… right?” Or feeling like you’re walking on eggshells, second-guessing everything while everyone else insists things are “fine”?In this raw and real episode, Amanda speaks directly to the silent warriors - partners, loved ones, and family members of someone struggling with substance use or addiction.Whether you use that word or not, if it feels like a problem for you? That’s enough.This episode explores:The subtle signs something isn’t right (before the “big” moments happen)Why you don’t need a diagnosis or external validation to know what’s realThe inner dialogue high-functioning, capable people often face in silenceHow to begin owning your experience—without waiting for someone else to change first✨ Whether you're just starting to question things, or you’ve been quietly navigating this for a while, Amanda offers grounded insight, compassionate truth bombs, and a gentle but firm reminder:You don’t need permission for this to be a problem for you.🎧 Tune in if:You’ve ever Googled: “Is this addiction?”You feel isolated, confused, or even ashamed about what’s happening at homeYou’re ready to reclaim clarity, strength, and direction (without needing their buy-in first)✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
49
45 - How to Support Your Kids When Their Other Parent Is Struggling With Addiction
This one’s for the Mother's navigating the unspoken and the unimaginable - the emotional toll of supporting your children when their other parent is struggling with addiction.In today’s heartfelt episode, Amanda gets radically real about what it means to show up as the safe parent (not the perfect one). Through her own lived experience, she shares what helped her move from daily survival mode to being the calm, grounded anchor her kids needed.Expect tough truths, validation, and practical guidance for any parent navigating chaos and craving clarity.Here’s what we cover:What it really means to be the “safe parent” (hint: not perfection)How addiction impacts your presence, patience, and parentingWhy focusing on your well-being is the oxygen mask your family needsThe power of honest conversations with your kidsHow to avoid gaslighting and build emotional safety at homeWhat to do when you feel like you're at capacity (because you probably are)If you’ve ever felt like you’re drowning while trying to keep everyone afloat, this is your reminder that there’s another way. And it starts with you, lovely lady.✨ Want to go deeper?Join us inside Pathway to Wellness Program. A supportive space where women learn how to reclaim calm, set boundaries, and lead their families through stormy seasons with strength. Details in the show notes.✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
48
44 - Why Holidays Feel Harder When You’re Living With Addiction
If you’re already dreading the holidays months in advance, you’re not alone. When addiction is part of the family picture, Christmas, Thanksgiving, birthdays and everything in between can feel less like joy and more like survival.The tension.The managing.The bracing.The pretending.The heartbreak.In this episode, we’ll explore:Why holidays amplify stress when addiction is in the mixHow to stop abandoning your own needs to “keep the peace”Ways to set boundaries without guiltFor spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
47
43 - Why Advice About Addiction Rarely Helps (and What to Do Instead)
“Just leave.” “It’s not that bad.” Sound familiar? Everyone has opinions about addiction, but most of them don’t help.You’re confused. You’re exhausted. It's a lot right now - addiction, recovery and everything in between, and what do you do? You message someone for advice - your sister, your cousin, a friend, a Facebook group. Suddenly, you’re swimming in five different opinions… and still don’t know what to do.In this episode, we’ll talk about:Why well-meaning advice often misses the markHow to trust your own voice over the crowdWhat to do instead of polling friends or family❤️ Ready to Rebuild Trust With Yourself?If you’re tired of outsourcing decisions and second-guessing everything… that’s what we work on every single week inside the Pathway to Wellness program. You’ll get tools, support, and a framework to reconnect with your own knowing—and make confident choices that feel right for you and your family - and the peace that brings is everything. join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness,✨ For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
46
42 - How many chances is too many?
If you've ever found yourself asking, "Should I give them another chance?" you are not alone, and this episode is for you.You're not weak for hoping things will change. You're not naïve for wanting the best. But if you're stuck in a cycle of promises, letdowns, and “one more chances,” it’s time to pause and ask: what is different this time, with this chance?In this episode, we unpack the real reason you keep giving chances, how hope (and fear) can keep you stuck, and what to consider before giving another one. I’ll share questions to help you cut through the confusion and get clear on what’s actually changing and what’s not.We’ll also talk about why trusting again isn’t just about them changing... but about you finding your voice again too.What You’ll Learn:Why giving another chance doesn’t make you a doormatHow to know if you’re stuck in the “hope trap”The hidden cost of constantly giving one more chance on repeatWhat a healthy “next chance” can actually look likeThe key question: Am I staying because I want to… or because I’m scared to leave?If this hit close to home, you’re not alone. And you don’t have to figure this out by yourself.For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guide📞 You can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.You can find your way through this. And you don’t have to do it alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
-
45
41 - The One Question Not to Ask Someone Struggling With Addiction
We’ve all done it: “Have you been drinking?” or “Did you use?” But asking this question rarely gets you the truth, and it keeps you stuck in the same painful cycle.In this episode, you’ll learn:Why that question shuts down honesty and connectionThe better way to approach communication when addiction is presentWhat to focus on instead (hint: your wellbeing and boundaries)For spouses and loved ones who are looking for resources and support:If you haven’t the Crisis Conversation Guide (What to say and what not to say when addiction takes over) ? Grab it now—it’s free and full of practical scripts to help you say what you mean (even when it’s messy):👉 Download the guideYou can also book a friendly, no-pressure chat with Amanda and explore what support might look like - without doing this alone, because you know you’ve been trying ‘that way’ for long enough by now.👉 Book in a friendly chat - Click here to find a time and let's talk about what's possible📝 Or join the waitlist for Pathway to Wellness, my signature program designed to help you rebuild your life alongside (or beyond) a loved one’s addiction.Your peace matters. And you’re closer than you think. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
We're indexing this podcast's transcripts for the first time — this can take a minute or two. We'll show results as soon as they're ready.
No matches for "" in this podcast's transcripts.
No topics indexed yet for this podcast.
Loading reviews...
ABOUT THIS SHOW
Addiction Makes Three The Podcast, with Amanda Lockyer is dedicated to shining a light and understanding the lesser talked about side of addiction. The real impact it has on the partners and families of those that struggle with addiction.Are you struggling with a partners addiction and feel at a complete loss as to what to do?You feel like you have no one to turn to and are worried you'll be judged or your partner will be judged. It can feel like no one understands what you are going through and no one could really imagine what this is really like.We will cover what it is truly like to be on the other side of a loved one struggling with addiction or navigating recovery. We will also dive deep on tools, ideas and strategies that will really help you whether you are at the confusing beginning the messy middle or through the other side, including practical tips and ways that you can actually get back to living again, regardless of the path your partner choo
HOSTED BY
Amanda Lockyer
Loading similar podcasts...