My Delight with Sarah Bartel

If you want a good foundation in your marriage for those problem-solving, conflict-solving, tension-resolving conversations, you need to build rapport and connection first with AWE:AffectionWarmth EncouragementThis concept is developed in Jim Burns' book Creating and Intimate Marriage: Rekindle Romance through Affection, Warmth, and Encouragement.In this episode, you'll learn examples for how to pour in more AWE in your marriage with affirmation and gratitude, non-sexual touch, and rooting for each other.If you want to learn more little things you can do with great love to build up your marriage, check out the Little Way of Marriage, the free online Catholic workshop Sarah and Nathan Bartel created for their CanaFeast ministry. Find it at www.littlewayofmarriage.com. 🌹🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Is it sinful for a wife to withhold sex when she's upset at her husband? Is it unfair if they've planned to make love, but then he does something to upset her, so she doesn't want to anymore?The truth is, emotional connection is the foundation for good lovemaking in marriage. If a wife is upset, she is not in a good place to make love. She shouldn't try to force her body to communicate a closeness, connection, and intimacy that her heart doesn't feel. If a wife is not experiencing physical and emotional equilibrium, the husband must respect that and surround her with care and affection, as Humanae vitae says when it warns that practices such as birth control which lead to an entitled attitude towards sex are dangerous because a husband "may forget the reverence due to a woman, and, disregarding her physical and emotional equilibrium, reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection." (Humanae vita, 17).To talk about "withholding" sex implies an entitled attitude. Sex is not something husbands and wives are entitled to in marriage--even if there is a common expectation that sex is part of marriage. The Catholic Church does not teach that it is a sin for a wife to decline lovemaking in any circumstances. She is always free to do so. Husbands are also always free to decline. It is possible that a wife may use lovemaking in a manipulative manner to try to control her husband's behavior, but this is objectifying herself, and she shouldn't do that. Instead, a wife should use words to explain why she is upset, and the couple should repair the relationship. Then, they can celebrate that repair with lovemaking... when it's the right time.A couple may need to increase their marriage skills in order to be able to have good, honest dialogue and get equipped to navigate good repair conversations. If they can tend their emotional connection, they'll be in a good place to celebrate that with their physical intimacy. 🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Here's the episode with all the things married women wish someone had told them when they first got married.Maybe you've been married a while, and no one ever told you. It's not too late to learn!Maybe you're a newlywed, or about to get married. You're in a great place to learn good habits early, before you settle into practices in your marriage that work against good lovemaking--practices that are unhelpful, harmful, or even sinful.If you want help unpacking these Ten Truths further, you can learn more in The Wedding Night and Beyond: The Catholic Bride's Guide to Sex in Marriage. This is good for engaged women, newlyweds, AND wives married decades who never learned all this at the beginning (which, let's be honest, is probably most women!).https://canafeast.com/weddingnightOther resources mentioned in this episodeThe Catechism of the Catholic Church  2363The Ohnut by the Pelvic People (device to reduce penetration depth to prevent pain)The Obligation Sex Series by Sheila Gregoire (excellent blog article series by an Evangelical Christian author/speaker)A Closer Look at Sexual Coercion (straightforward article on a hotline website)My Delight podcast episode "Marital Debt is Not Church Teaching"My Delight podcast episode "What is Sexual Coercion?"🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Your brain is your most important sexual organ.As you go through your days, weeks, months, and years, you need to make space in your brain for relaxation, creativity, fun, and pleasure... if you want to have those in lovemaking.You have to learn to periodically value other things more than productivity.-Connection-Rest-Play-DelightA woman in a chronic stress state is not going to be able to enjoy sex very much. In this episode, Sarah shares some examples for how you can slow down and connect with yourself ....and with your husband!... in order to create the foundation you need for good lovemaking. 🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

When Megan Gephart first signed up for the My Delight course, her husband was deployed. She and her husband were both active duty military, and they wouldn't be together for months, but she was decided to use the time while he was away to start work on herself before.Years later, Megan is still seeing the fruits unfold in her marriage. She shares her story of the tremendous changes she made.🍍 She decided not to push through pain any more--and to finally talk to her husband about it.🍓 She realized her pleasure mattered just as much as her husband's--which led to even more more honest, open communication than she'd ever had before in her marriage.🍇 Now creating time to be together is a big priority. Hear the story of the weekend getaway that was like "heaven on earth"--though events, tensions, a nursing infant, and a big NFP decision leading up to the weekend could have derailed it.  🫐 She went from avoiding intimacy and avoiding non-sexual touch to finding her way to turn towards and actively choose connection. 🍒 Listen to Meghan share the genius shift her therapist suggested that is helping non-sexual touch go SO much better in her marriage now!Megan and her husband are now preparing a new adventure with military orders to Germany. She shares how they are being intentional about preparing for this new adventure (and all the packing and tasks leading up to it), while continuing to communicate closely about prioritizing their marriage, improving their love life ever more, and preparing for the years when they'll be that loving, affectionate silver-haired older couple sitting on their porch swing!Follow Megan Gephart's work supporting Catholic women entrepreneurs and professionals with coaching for strategy, operations, and sustainable growth at Apostolic Fruit. She also co-hosts the Apostolic Fruit podcast with her business partner, Anna Saucier.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Most marriages have one spouse who is more interested in sex, and another who is less interested. This is desire difference. While this is normal--most marriages have a desire difference one way or another--it causes a lot of tension in marriages.Sarah brings on her husband, Nathan, to talk about understanding desire difference from a husband's point of view at a deeper level. Beyond just physical libido, he shares about the yearning for connection with their wives he hears from men he's worked with who have the higher desire. He also shares what it's like for the husband who has the lower desire.Understanding is key, and so are actionable skills that couples can use to help navigate the different factors at work.Sarah and Nathan point some paths forward to creating more connection--including not making sex the only source of connection in the marriage. They discuss the importance of recognizing the wife's mental load, and how the wife and husband can work with that. Affirmation and gratitude, non-sexual touch, empathy, and curiousity all help husbands and wives grow closer, feel seen, feel like they matter to the other, and grow in their unity and emotional connection.Catholic husbands interested in Nathan's free Desires Differences workshop can join here through March 12th. Replays of past calls are available.Desires Differences Workshop:https://canafeast.com/desire🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

When we fast, we can expect a pattern of five spiritual attacks--whether the fast is from food, behaviors like scrolling, people-pleasing, or other comforts.The enemy works in our false attachments: to things, to false gods, and to false comforts. He likes to get us to put something above God in our life, and that creates disorder.Fasting restores order.It puts God back as the center of our life.Of course the enemy will pursue our soul when we do this. Learn his tactics, learn that this is normal (you are not failing), and then learn how to gently and lovingly restore proper order after an attack. Denise Jelinek joins Sarah to break down the play book for each of these five attacks... and shares what to do about them.They touch on authentic self-care and tie it all in to Join Denise in fasting from the scale and finding peace with food this Lent in her beautiful and deeply transformative 63 Surrendered Program! Ash Wednesday Sale: Get it for $1 a day (coupon code: Lent63)Join here: https://weightlosswiththeholyspirit.com/🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

It's almost Lent! Listen to the voice of the Lord speak:"I will lead her into the desert, and there I will speak to her heart." Hos 2:14So many good Catholic married women feel like there's a desert of some kind in their love life. Maybe it's a libido desert, or a postpartum desert, or a menopause desert. Maybe it's the ache of not feeling as desired by your husband as you'd like. Maybe lovemaking just feels humdrum and routine So many different kinds of deserts!The scriptures can renew our minds and bring supernatural inspiration. In this episode, Sarah shares three lessons from the Song of Songs to help guide your love life. As she reads this scripture through the lens of a Catholic sex and marriage coach, she sees:1. The Bride's body image is very positive!2. Great use of words and talking between the Bridegroom and the Bride. More Catholic couples should be talking about their love life with each other and talking while making love. You have a love story. Keep telling the story!3. Use all 5 senses. The Song of Songs uses vivid language for all five senses. How can you incorporate and highlight the sense of touch, taste, smell, sight, and hearing in different ways to enliven your time coming together? Sarah shares just a few examples of ideas in this episode, but more is available in her Bloom in the Desert virtual retreat happening Feb. 18-24. It's free! Learn more from the Song of Songs to inspire your love life, do fun homework, win prizes, enjoy a safe Catholic community of sisters in Christ all committed to growing together. Enroll here:https://canafeast.com/desertbloom🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Making you feel guilty for saying "no."Wearing you down with asking over and over.You just want to get some sleep... the babies will be up at 5 am, so you just give in to get it over with....These are all examples of sexual coercion, which is a form of emotional abuse. Sarah is joined by Jenny DuBay, a certified trauma-informed Catholic coach, certified deconstructing gaslighting specialist, and certified narcissistic abuse specialist to talk about sexual coercion in marriage and the importance of consent to sex in Catholic marriage.Just because you're married doesn't mean you have to be constantly sexually available. That's not the teaching of the Catholic Church, and Jenny uses her theology degree and deep knowledge of TOB and Church teaching to dive into this topic.Listen in if you want to hear about the many different forms sexual coercion can take in Catholic marriage... and what to do about it.Get Jenny's DuBay's book Don't Plant Your Seeds Among Thorns: A Catholic's Guide to Recognizing and Healing from Domestic Abuse (EnRoute Books and Media, 2024)Learn more about Jenny athttps://www.jennydubay.comand learn more about healthy relationships in the articles on her SubStack at:https://www.createsoulspace.org/🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

How does nutrition impact our hormones for libido and perimenopause thriving? Sarah is joined by Catholic nutritionist Rita Johnson of the Health and Hormones podcast to chat about how what you eat can impact your libido and perimenopause hormones. Along the way they chat about the power of dreaming, mindset shifts, and four high-protein breakfast ideas to anchor your blood sugar and set you up for a stable day... the kind of day more likely to leave with with some extra energy for intimacy at the end of it, if you want!You can find Rita at https://healthandhormones.org.Interested in the 5-day Perimenopause Workshop that Rita, Sarah, and other Catholic experts are offering Jan. 26-30? All sessions will be recorded so you can catch the replays. Walk away with a workbook full of practical strategies.https://healthandhormones.org/perimenopause-workshop Want Rita's free handout on hormone health?https://birdsend.page/forms/9473/cDk9YT4KSn🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Ladies, this is your invitation from Sarah to join her on a "Daughters of Grace" Women's pilgrimage to France in May 2026!It's this May 4-13th, in the footsteps of St. Thérèse, her mama St. Zélie, St. Joan of Arc ("I was born to do this!"), and of course, all guided, inspired, and devoted to Our Lady. You'll pray at Notre Dame cathedral, the Chapel of the Miraculous Medal, Mont St. Michel where we'll seek the archangel's strength and protection, and culminate with a healing of hearts at Lourdes.The themes of the dignity of women, feminine genius, the theology of the body throughout  a woman's life cycle, and healing the heart of a woman will all be woven throughout the pilgrimage.Sarah shares her pivotal memory of encountering St. John Paul II at World Youth Day in Paris in 1997 in an atmosphere of joy, gathered with thousands of youth from around by the Holy Spirit. In this episode, Sarah shares seven reasons why she loves France and wants to take you there with her. 1. The country's devotion to Our Lady2. French saints! 3. Breathtaking cathedrals (French Gothic architecture 😍)4. Beauty 5. Intelligence + Elegance6. The French Language7. The FoodThe pilgrimage costs $4,199 for the land-only package in which you arrange your travel to and from France, or $4,999 flying from Seattle. More info athttps://canafeast.com/franceWant to go, but can't? Pray this novena to see if a way might open up through the Little Flower's prayers!My Novena Rose PrayerO Little Therese of the Child Jesus, please pick for me a rosefrom the heavenly gardens and send it to me as a message of love.O Little Flower of Jesus, ask God to grant the favorsI now place with confidence in your hands . .(mention in silence here)St. Therese, help me to always believe as you did inGod’s great love for me, so that I might imitate your “Little Way” each day.AmenWant to join the free online formation on the pilgrimage themes? Sign up at:https://canafeast.com/france🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What should you wear as you climb into bed with your husband for a lovemaking night?Sarah invites you to consider:Wearing something that makes you feel good. 1. It might feel good in terms of comfort. It might feel cozy and comforting on your skin and keep you warm. 2. It might make you feel good because it looks good on you. It's your color. The cut and fit suit you and flatter you. That's another wonderful reason to wear something to bed! 3. It might make you feel good because it feels sensual, with slinky, soft fabric.4. Maybe it feels good because you feel feminine, sexy, or confident in it. That can help you get in the right attitude for lovemaking. Lingerie is okay. You don't have to wear it, but you can. There's nothing immoral about it, and in fact, it is quite likely that some of the lace made by St. Zélie Martin's workshop was for lingerie.If you want to wear lingerie, consider a model-free store such as  Mentionables. (Get 10% off with the affiliate link: https://www.shopmentionables.com/BARTEL)Or, consider the unique, hand-made, fair-trade pieces made by Ginger and Peach. https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.comAnother tip is to go to an upscale department store, try on some chemises and nightgowns to see what you like, and then see if you can find them for a fraction of the price on eBay.Imaginary lingerie is another great way to go! It fits perfectly, looks great on you, doesn't itch, scratch, or ride up, and it's FREE! 5. Don't do this if it's bringing you down!  Is ratty, stretched-out sleepwear dragging your energy down and making you feel frumpy and un-sexy? You deserve to feel good. If it's dragging you down, ditch it, and make an intentional choice to wear something that makes you feel good as you climb into bed to meet your husband.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What is a sex sabbatical? How do you know if you need one? What do you do during it, and how do you change up your dynamic afterwards?In this episode, Sarah shares how a sex sabbatical can be a helpful way to reset your love life in marriage. If you're in a cycle of obligation sex, forcing yourself to have painful sex, or just feeling burnt out, used, or resentful about sex in your marriage, a sex sabbatical can be just what a wife needs. It can give her the time to reflect on how she got to this point, it can give her space to research and learn more, and it can give her time to plan out and design a better chapter going forward, after coming together with her husband again.A husband and wife can use this time to develop other areas of intimacy in their marriage that may have gotten neglected. They can work on their communication, deepen emotional intimacy, and expand their repertoire of non-sexual touch. Resources mentioned in this episode:Mary Bruno, Missing Pieces: Female Perspectives on Sex for Catholic Women (book)Cana Feast Retreat Library (at-home Catholic date night retreats for a small dose of cemotional connection)Abundant Catholic Marriage Course (comprehensive online program for a big dose of emotional connection)Ruth Buezis, Awaken Love: The Truth about Sex That Will Transform Your Marriage (book)🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What does the Blessed Virgin Mary have to do with your love life as a Catholic wife? Is it even appropriate to turn to her for help in this area, seeing as she is a virgin--the Virgin of virgins, in fact?Yes! She is the passionate spouse of the Holy Spirit, and you do not need to be shy of asking her help with this intimate sanctuary of your marriage. -Mary is the perfect model of active receptivity. This concept can help you grow in your love life. Some women need to develop the "active" side of this more, and for others, perhaps it's the "receptivity" they need to work on. Meditating on what "active receptivity" means for you can be helpful.-You can ask Mary's help by praying a novena to Our Lady, Undoer of Knots for help undoing knots of shame, ignorance, wounds, and other obstacles holding you back from enjoying peace, freedom, and wholeness in your love life.-St. John Paul II was deeply devoted to Our Lady, and he is also the pope who has written and spoken most on sex and marriage.-Consider consecrating yourself to Our Lady, praying the Rosary, and approaching her for help. Her help and protection are powerful. St. Maximilian Kolbe's Consecration to Mary (read about the preparation as well):https://militiaoftheimmaculata.com/act-of-consecration-to-mary/St. Louis deMontfort's Total Consecration to Jesus through Mary🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

So many moms feel touched out by the end of the day and don't want their husband to touch them, especially not in lovemaking. How do you handle this?In this episode, Sarah shares 4 tips for handling that touched-out feeling that affects moms with young kids as well as other hands-on caregivers.1. Set boundaries with your kids to save yourself from some of the unwanted touches throughout the day--for example, teach them not to tug at your clothes, if that drives you nuts. 2. Take the time you need to reset and regulate after a high-touch day. You can calm your nervous system down. Scrolling and screens won't do this; a walk, a book, quiet time by yourself can. After you reset, you might be more open to touch than you thought you could be.3. Your back, feet, and legs probably aren't touched-out. It's usually your arms, upper torso, head, and maybe core/ lap area that are. After you reset, invite your husband to touch you in those places that haven't been overstimulated. Try a back massage, a foot rub, or a leg massage first. Once you're feeling good from those touches, you will likely feel more open to touch in your upper torso, arms, head, and core/pelvis/lap area. 4. Are you an HSP? Take the quiz to see if you're a Highly Sensitive Person. https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Learning that you are an HSP can help you learn how to take care of yourself better. Know that overstimulation from touch will affect you more than others, and give yourself extra reset time and white space in your day. Learn more about the superpowers and sufferings of being an HSP at hsperson.com, and learn to talk with your husband about your bubble. Sometimes your bubble of personal space will be big, other times smaller and more porous. Use this, or some other image, to communicate with your husband about whether coming in for some touch is welcome or not at any given time.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Mary Bruno wrote Missing Pieces: Female Perspectives on Sex for Catholic Women in response to a lack of women's voices among the popular speakers and authors who are most well-known for bringing messages about theology of the body and Catholic teachings on sex and marriage.The theology and teachings are beautiful and true, but they implicitly assume that sex will be pleasurable. What if it's painful, as up to 75% of women will experience at some point in their lives? What if they desire it more than their husbands do? What if they don't realize that there's skill to learn in this area, and incorrectly assume it will be amazing right off the bat, starting from the wedding night? These are some of the experiences Mary addresses in her book. Join Sarah and Mary in a fascinating discussion in an area that needs more attention!Mary Bruno, Missing Pieces: Female Perspectives on Sex for Catholic Women, 2024. Find Mary on her website, marybruno.comFollow her in IG @whitelotusblooming🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

How do you find time for sex when you'e a busy mom with young kids?First, Sarah shares three mindset shifts, plus a bonus note on attitudes about motherhood:1. You NEED to make time for your marriage. You don't find it, you make it. You need to make time for emotional connection with your husband, and also for sex. Ideally, you want both of them together, but if you only have time for one, consider prioritizing emotional connection first. Consider scheduling it, and have an attitude that accepts that preparation will make it better--just as Mass is scheduled, and entails many layers of preparation (the homily, music, flowers, usher plan, etc.).2. Emotional connection is so important for making lovemaking meaningful and pleasurable. Women are designed to thrive sexually in an atmosphere of heart-to-heart connection with their husband, which includes that feeling of being truly known and seen. 3. Good lovemaking takes time: ideally, 15-60+ minutes per session. If you don't care about it feeling good and bonding, or you don't care about feeling mutual pleasure, you don't need much time. However, that is likely to lead to you, the wife, feeling left behind, used, and resentful. You will be more likely to see sex as just another chore to check off your list. 4. Motherhood does not have to mean you are frazzled and exhausted. That is not a sign that you are doing it right. It is incredibly demanding, but look for where you can bring in help and make space for more in your life than just caring for your kids. Make time to cultivate your mind, your friendships, your hobbies... and your idea of yourself as a lover, not just a mother. That said, here are four ideas for making time for good lovemaking in marriage:1. Weekend afternoon, during the little one's nap. Put on a movie and set out snacks for the bigger kids. Then, Mommy and Daddy go to their bedroom to have "a little nap." 2. Cereal Night. This is a weekday night in which you serve the easiest dinner possible--maybe even just cold cereal, in plastic bowls! Streamline the bedtime rooutine. Make it the simplest, easiest possible version of dinner and bedtime. Then, once the kids are in bed, Mom and Dad make a bee-line for their bedroom WITHOUT PICKING UP THEIR PHONES, laptop, or tablets first. (Those screens are "thieves in the night" that will steal your precious opportunities for emotional and sexual connection! They're a trap. Stay off, or an hour later you'll find yourselves scrolling or surfing, and then too tired to really have good lovemaking.) 3. Set Your Alarms for the Middle of the Night. Get in one solid sleep cycle, and set your alarm for 4 hours after your heads hit the pillow. Then, wake up, make love in the dead of night, and go back to sleep for the rest of the night. 🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

In this episode, Sarah welcomes special guest Nathan Bartel... her husband! Sarah asks Nathan about what led him to create his Holy Desires course for husbands. Along the way, they chat about:Philosophy (Nathan's Master's degree from CUA and his love of Aristotle)VirtueStruggles Husbands Face (mismatched libidos in marriage, not knowing how their wives' sexuality works, and finding the time amidst work and kids)Sex in Three Acts (Act I: Beforeplay + Foreplay, Act II: Intercourse, Act II: Afterglow)Men are Helicopters, Women are Jet Planes (Nathan reacts to a metaphor Sarah is testing out to help highlight the difference between men's and women's sexual responses.)Nathan's 6-week Holy Desires class open through Friday, Oct. 10th, and won't reopen until March 2026. Check it out here if interested.Want his free guide, Three Secrets to Becoming the Lover of Her Dreams? Here you go!🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

If you're using NFP to avoid pregnancy (TTA), how can you thrive in your marriage with the abstinence period in your fertile window? How do you stay close? What sort of physical affection and touch is appropriate? (No genital stimulation for intentional arousal.) How can you harness the extra boost from the ovulation hormones to set yourself up for better lovemaking once you get the green light again?🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Maybe you're a Catholic wife with sex struggles in your marriage, but you think, "Oh well, that's just how it is." In this episode, Sarah lays out five reasons why it's worth your bother to figure out how to make things better for you. 1. You're worth it. 2. Sex is the body language of the wedding vows, so learning how to communicate the messages of love in those vows well is important.3. The practice of improving your experience of your love life can strengthen your marriage. 4. You want to model a healthy, holy, positive view of sex for your kids.5. It's not going to get better on its own.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What about having sex during your period (as a married Catholic woman)? What are some things to think about? There are no moral prohibitions to this in the Catholic faith. Different NFP methods may have guidance around avoiding period sex if you're trying to avoid pregnancy. Some women may just avoid it because they assume it's yucky, but in this episode, Sarah challenges this thought. It is beautiful to be a woman, and having a period is part of the goodness of God's plan in creating women. Sarah shares practical tips, as well as a book consideration for hormonal health, Hormone Intelligence by Aviva Romm.Related: On the Dignity and Vocation of Women, by St. John Paul II (1988)🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Are quick lovemaking sessions (less than 20-30 min or so) a good idea in your Catholic marriage, or not? In this episode, Sarah offers some cautionary and probing questions meant to identify if quickies are helping build your unity and connection or if they're reinforcing bad habits in your love life. She draws on quotes from Church documents to identify some principles to help you discern whether they're serving the highest goals of marriage.While the Catholic Church does not offer specific guidelines or rules about how long lovemaking sessions should be, in most cases, Sarah personally recommends against quickies. God created female sexuality to normally require much more time per lovemaking session in order to operate well and thrive. Some circumstances in which quickies might be a good idea are treated in this episode.Catholic Church documents referenced in this episode:Catechism of the Catholic Church, par. 2361"Sexuality, by means of which man and woman give themselves to one another through the acts which are proper and exclusive to spouses, is not something simply biological, but concerns the innermost being of the human person as such. It is realized in a truly human way only if it is an integral part of the love by which a man and woman commit themselves totally to one another until death."Humanae Vitae, par. 17"Another effect that gives cause for alarm is that a man who grows accustomed to the use of contraceptive methods may forget the reverence due to a woman, and, disregarding her physical and emotional equilibrium, reduce her to being a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, no longer considering her as his partner whom he should surround with care and affection."Casti Connubi, par. 23"This conjugal faith, however, which is most aptly called by St. Augustine the "faith of chastity" blooms more freely, more beautifully and more nobly, when it is rooted in that more excellent soil, the love of husband and wife which pervades all the duties of married life and holds pride of place in Christian marriage. For matrimonial faith demands that husband and wife be joined in an especially holy and pure love, not as adulterers love each other, but as Christ loved the Church. This precept the Apostle laid down when he said: "Husbands, love your wives as Christ also loved the Church,"[24] that Church which of a truth He embraced with a boundless love🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What gets you in the mood? That's an accelerator. What are you libido-killers? Those are your breaks. In this episode, Sarah describes common brakes and accelerators for women.  She shares some ideas for how to learn what your own personal brakes and accelerators are, and suggests how you can use this knowledge in order to optimize your love life in your marriage.Resources mentioned in this episode.Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski (a book by a secular researcher on female sexuality0"Libido Killer" by Holderness Family Music (a humorous video, G-rated and safe for work)🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

How grave do your reasons need to be to use NFP to avoid pregancy? The precise language the Church uses in Humanae Vitae discussing the kinds of reasons legitimating using NFP actually refers to "just reasons," "serious reasons," or "well-grounded reasons." The phrase "grave reason" is a mistranslation which gives the misleading impression that you have to be practically on death's doorstep or so broke you're eating dirt in order to use NFP to avoid. In this episode, Sarah looks at the categories of reasons Humanae vitae mentions, and offers some specific examples. She also recommends a way to pray together as husband and wife to get on the same page about your intention to avoid or try to achieve pregnancy.Resources mentioned in the show:Humanae vitaeEveryday in Love"How to Talk about the Use and Abuse of Natural Family Planning and the Importance of Accuracy in Translation and Description," academic article by Kevin E. Miller in the Linacre Quarterly🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Can you use NFP with a contraceptive mentality? Is this something to beware of? No.Sarah debunks the false worry that NFP users need to watch out for using NFP with a contraceptive mentality.She looks at the origin of the phrase in magisterial Catholic documents in its context to discover what the "contraceptive mentality" actually refers to, and points to additional references.References for This Episode:Magisterial Catholic Church Documents:Humanae vitaeFamiliaris consortio (1981, St. John Paul II)Gaudium et spes (Vatican II, read esp. paragraphs 48-52 for beautiful teachings on marriage)The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality (1995, Pontifical Council for the Family)Other References:"NFP: The Myth of the Contraceptive Mentality," article by Fr. Ryan Erlenbush"That Pesky 'Contraceptive Mentality,'" blog post by Christina Valenzuela of Pearl & ThistleThe Contraceptive Mentality is Real, But It's Probably Not What You Think, blog post by Simcha Fisher. "How to Talk about the Use and Abuse of Natural Family Planning and the Importance of Accuracy in Translation and Description," academic article by Kevin E. Miller in the Linacre Quarterly🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What is this idea of marital debt? Where is it in the Catechism, or in other official magisterial Church documents? (Hint: It's not actually there!) What does a belief in marital debt do to a married Catholic or Christian woman?In this episode, Sarah tackles marital debt head-on, debunking the idea that obligation sex for wives is the teaching of the Church. She shares quotes from official church teachings and looks to a common quote from the Supplement to the Summa (not actually written by St. Thomas Aquinas, but by one of his students) that is used to support an obligation sex idea of marital debt. At the end of the episode, she shares additional podcasts you can listen to in order to learn more about how marital debt is not official Catholic Church teaching.These are:Managing Your Fertility Episodes 66-68: "Dr. Tim Pawl: Can I say No to s*x with my spouse? aka the marital debt!" 3 part series.MissHappyCatholic: Marital Debt Deep Dive Parts 1 + 2: Facts and FictionsHere are so more resources educating on the importance of consent to sex in Catholic marriage (free of coercion):"A Catholic Guide to Practicing Consent in Marriage," by Grace Wojdak (from Notre Dame's Church Life Journal)"Catholics Should Care about Sex and Consent," by Grace Wojdak (America Magazine)"Sexual Coercion, Sacramental Marriage, and the 'Alarm Clock' Method," by Jenny DuBay (Patheos)And this series by Evangelical Protestant author Sheila Gregoire on the harms of obligation sex and how to undo them is excellent:"Obligation Sex Series: 10 Things to Know about Obligation Sex,' by Sheila Gregoir (BareMarriage.com)🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

How do you lovingly decline your husband's initiation of sex in a way that is still connecting and that doesn't feel like such a harsh personal rejection to him? In this episode, you'll learn how to put your "no" inside a Positivity Sandwich that affirms him and your desire to be connected in your relationship. *I address women declining husbands' initiations in this episode, but this technique is also very good for husbands to use when declining their wife's initiation, also!🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

The Abundant Catholic marriage course is on sale for 50% off (coupon code: JOY) until Thurs, June 10th in honor of the upcoming feast of Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin!🌹 Learn more at canafeast.com/abundantYes, life is busy... but that doesn't mean you can let your marriage stagnate on the back burner. Here are three reasons why you NEED to keep growing in your marriage and relationship skills, as well as some ideas for how to work on your marriage. 1. Continuing education is important (and often required!) for professionals so they stay up to date and pursue excellence, whether as teachers, doctors, engineers, or accountants. In marriage, we also need continuing education! Continual growth, improvement, and change for the better is also part of the call every Christian has to continual conversion and growth in holiness. In marriage, we need to keep learning how to love better.2.  Your kids and community deserve for your to be the best example of marriage you can be. Could you see your kids growing up and saying, "I want a marriage like my parents had?" This should be our goal!3. Your sex life will benefit from improving your relationship skills, communication, connection, and togetherness! Sexual intimacy thrives in a marriage climate of emotional intimacy. It needs it in order to do what God designed it to do--to be a total, mutual, personal gift of self that is the physical expression of the spiritual communion of husband and wife.Different ways to grow in your marriage can include: reading books about marriage and relationships, listening to podcasts, doing an online course, going on a marriage retreat, intentionally carving out time for each other, or going to counseling as a learning experience. 🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

In this episode, I’m joined by my husband Nathan as we share three keys to building emotional intimacy in marriage, inspired by Saints Louis and Zélie Martin.You will hear about how this saintly couple put faith at the center of their relationship, and how they stayed connected and united to each other while honoring each other’s differences. We also share practical examples from our own marriage and offer a lot of encouragement along the way! If you want to join my husband and I for a deeper look at the spirituality of Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin, along with the "Little Way" of their daughter, Saint Therese of Lisieux, register for our free Little Way of Marriage workshop!👉 Little Way of Marriage Workshop:www.littlewayofmarriage.com🌹 🌹 🌹🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Are you not enjoying sex in your Catholic marriage? I bet I know why. It's likely at least one of these top 3 reasons that come up with women all the time in my coaching.1. Obligation sex. 2. Not enough foreplay3. Not enough emotional connectionWomen, your enjoyment of sex matters just as much as your husband's pleasure! You are created equal. Know your worth as a woman.Resources mentioned in this show:Ellen Holloway's Charting Towards Intimacy podcast! 😍Obligation Sex article series by Sheila GregoireA Catholic moral philosopher countering the idea of marital debt: Dr. Tim Pawls 2 part interview series on Bridget Busacker's Managing Your Fertility PodcastImprove emotional connection with the Cana Feast Retreat Library or the Abundant course, both available on CanaFeast.com.Or try our free Little Way of Marriage workshop to learn small things that can improve your emotional and spiritual connection in marriage.My new sex course for Catholic engaged and newlywed women! The Wedding Night and Beyond: A Catholic Bride's Guide to Sex and Intimacy🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What can parents do to help prevent sexual abuse of their kids AND raise them to have a balanced, shame-free attitude towards their bodies? What should you do if your child keeps touching themselves? Dr. Julia Sadusky, a licensed clinical psychologist, and author, shares how Catholic parents can talk to their children and teens about sex in a healthy, helpful way. Dr. Sadusky shares practical advice for addressing:early childhood curiositysetting boundaries and fostering open communication. So many adult women in marriage feel bad about their bodies and about their sexuality. Sarah has seen this with the married and engaged women she coaches. This type of conversation can help women heal their own sexual mindsets, which can allow them to feel more free to enjoy their love lives with their husbands in marriage.Read these helpful books to learn more!Start Talking to Your Kids About Sex: A Practical Guide for Catholics, by Julia SaduskyTalking with Your Teen About Sex: A Practical Guide for Catholics, by Julia SaduskyFind Dr. Julia Sadusky on her website, juliasadusky.com🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

How frequently should you be making love in your marriage?This episode is all about frequency! In it, I share about:-Quality vs. quanity-Desire differences between spouses-Spontaneous vs. responsive libido-What the Church teaches about frequency (you might be surprised!)-How to communicate about it as a couple-One Christian author's observation about frequency to consider🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What is perimenopause? How long does it last? What are the signs that you are in it? How can it affect your fertility and libido? Sarah talks with Christina Valenzuela, creator of the Perimenopause Prep Course, about thriving in the years before and after menopause. Understanding perimenopause, learning how to support your body through it, and communicating with your husband about your love life through this major change can empower you as a woman to be more positive and proactive about your hormonal and sexual well-being as the fertile years wind down. Check out Christina Valenzuela's wonderful Perimenopause Prep course!Pearl and Thistle offers:Educational resources rooted in Theology of the BodyTools for building body literacy at all ages and stagesCatholic resources that blend science and sacramental worldview🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What challenges do single Catholic women face as they strive to live chastely while waiting to be married? How far is it okay to go when you are dating? How does a single woman develop of positive view of sex while not actually having sex? Maria Spears Mumaugh, a musician and mindset coach, is the co-founder of The Intentional Single, which helps single Catholic women thrive in the years of dating and single life as they prepare for marriage. She shares the struggles single women face regarding porn use, feeling "touch-starved" (and what to do about it), navigating appropriate boundaries while dating, and navigating purity culture's burden of anxiety and shame around sexuality.They chat about fears dating women have about their boyfriends' (or future husband's) porn use, and how to address this likely possibility if marriage is in view.Join in this fun conversation about thriving as a whole woman and laying a great foundation for your married sex life WHILE being single and dating.The Intentional SingleMaria Spears Mumaugh's book The Mirror 🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

"It's a marvel how resilient we are." This episode cannot take the place of individual therapy, but it CAN educate and encourage you about the possibilities for healing from past sexual trauma in order to enjoy lovemaking in marriage in this conversation rooted in hope and resilience. Suppose a wife cringes when her husband touches her shoulder in a certain way and suggests they go to bed early that night. She wants to run away. She definitely does NOT want to head upstairs and engage in intimacy, even though she loves her husband. When she was younger, someone abused her sexually, and this whole realm of sexuality still feels terrible for her. If she works with a good therapist, what steps will she learn to take to go from wanting to run away to tolerating that touch on her shoulder... to eventually enjoying it, and even heading upstairs with some enthusiasm? That is what you will learn in this episode.Sarah is joined by Dr. Mario Sacasa, LMFT, a popular speaker, retreat leader, and course creator. Mario is the host of the Always Hope podcast and has served on the faculty of Notre Dame Seminary, Divine Mercy University, and the Institute for Priestly Formation. He brings an incredible combination of knowledge, spiritual insight, and practical steps to this important conversation. Sarah and Mario talk about the importance of communication between husband and wife when there is a history of past sexual trauma for one or both of them. In this episode, you'll hear some of the topics that the couple would benefit from addressing, as well as how that communication can help the other spouse understand the patience and gentleness that are needed as the healing spouse goes through their process. Right at the end, Mario asks Sarah a moral theology question about real-life imperfect outcomes that could occur during this process. Find more great conversations  with Dr. Mario Sacasa on dating, marriage, sexuality, and the misunderstood virtue of hope on his Always Hope podcast!Dr. Mario's Dating Well course takes young adults by the hand and guidesthem through the challenges of the modern dating scene.Dr. Mario's course on Overcoming Stress and Anxiety, produced by Good Catholic Media, offers information and skills to beat anxious thoughts.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

As we mourn the death of Pope Francis and reflect on his gifts to the church during his papacy, this is a great moment to recall his (surprisingly traditional!) teachings on sex in marriage from Amoris Laetitia, The Joy of Love. In this post-synodol apostolic exhortation from 2015 that capped the Synod on the Family, Pope Francis makes four main points about married sex:1. The church teaches that sex is meant to be a good! It is a gift from God enriching joy in marriage, not just a "necessary evil" to be tolerated because it is the means of procreation. 2. But sex is often distorted and misused. (This ties into porn culture.)3. Obligation sex is not church teaching.  (This relates to a mistaken idea of "marital debt.")4.  Let's not be squeamish and disdainful of the body and sexuality. (This relates to purity culture.)Read Amoris Laetitia for free on the Vatican website here.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Opening with "birthday cake" analogy, this episode focuses on different ways to heal from sexual wounds, abuse, regrets, and harmful messages that a woman may have suffered. These harms can bind her up and keep her from experiencing the fullness of freedom, connection, joy, and delight the the Lord intends for her in marital intimacy. During Holy Week is the perfect time to bring all these wounds to Jesus, to lay at the foot of his Cross. Therapies that can help heal emotional wounds from past sexual abuse:Internal Family Systems (this involves "parts work," taking care of the younger parts of yourself)Lifespan Integration TherapyEMDRDeliverance Prayer Unbound / Heart of the Father Ministries (you can request an online prayer session, or search an in-person team near you)🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Catholic pelvic floor specialist Veronica Stephens returns to discuss how pelvic floor issues can show up in married life. So many challenges can be addressed through pelvic floor work, including painful intercourse, incontinence, constipation, and possibly even erectile dysfunction (ED). (Yes, men can get pelvic floor help as well!) A healthy functioning pelvic floor also prepares a mother for better birth, and postpartum recovery for issues like diastasis rectii can be helped with pelvic floor work. Sarah and Veronica discuss how tension throughout the whole body can affect the pelvic floor, as well as how our breathing impacts pelvic floor tension.Veronica opens up about how her own personal journey with physical fitness helped her grow closer to God and find spiritual meaning in helping others optimize their overall health.  Find Veronica Stephens at https://www.renewedresilience.net🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Before you can effectively to anything else to improve your love life in marriage, you have to get the porn out. Sarah shares 10 resources, programs, and tips to help husbands get free, to help wives heal from betrayal trauma, and to help married couples rebuild their intimate life.If you wanted to redecorate your living room, but there was a fire in it, you'd have to put out the fire before you start thinking about paint colors and rearranging the furniture. Afterwards, you'd also have to clean up the scorch marks and care for burns. In the house of your marital intimacy, you need to get the porn out first in order to establish safety and authentic emotional intimacy. The distortions in assumptions about how sex should work then need to be corrected. (God made women's arousal curves much slower and longer than men's, but women in porn are paid to fake being aroused quickly.)  Emotional wounds from betrayal trauma need to be healed, and the couple needs to establish their intimacy anew from the ground up. 4 Resources to Help Husbands Get Free from Porn:1. Sexaholics Anonymous, a 12-step peer support program2. Programs like  Pure Desires, Naked Truth Project3. Strive: 21-Day Porn Detox, a Catholic program with Matt Fradd4. CSAT counseling (Certified Sexual Addiction Therapists)*BONUS TIP: Install device-protecting software like Covenant Eyes 3 Resources to Help Wives Heal from Betrayal Trauma5. Hope's Garden, a Catholic ministry online that includes a coaching option6. Coaching with Catholic coach Casey Allison 7. Bloom for Women and Bloom for Catholic Women3 Tips to Help Post-Porn Couples Restore Authentic Intimacy1. Talk to each other during lovemaking. This roots both husband and wife's mind in the present moment. Hearing her husband's voice is very connecting for the wife and distracts her from negative thoughts, worries that his mind is going back to memories of porn.2. Specifically, the🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What do newlywed and engaged women need to know about their pelvic floor as they enter into marital intimacy? Sarah is joined by Catholic pelvic floor specialist Veronica Stephens of RenewedResilience.net. They cover the basics of what a healthy, functioning pelvic floor should be able to do, as well as a few of the problems that can arise when the pelvic floor doesn't function properly--problems such as incontinence, pain during intercourse, and constipation. Veronica shares her unique path to her profession, from her beginnings as a theology major at Christendom College to finding her way to physical training and pelvic floor certifications to help women. Sarah and Veronica discuss the mind-body connection by which a woman's beliefs and memories about sex affects her vaginal muscles.Veronica Stephens is at RenewedResilience.net🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Sarah and her amazing friend Ellen Holloway of the Charting Towards Intimacy podcast share 7 tips for engaged women preparing for their first time after the wedding. They chat about setting expectations for yourself and with your husband-to-be, what essential items you are going to want to have on hand, butterflies in the stomach, the supreme importance of FOREPLAY, being like a flower, lingerie, and having fun. Ellen Holloway's Free Foreplay Guide for Catholic WomenEllen Holloway's Charting Towards Intimacy podcastGinger and Peach Catholic-owned model-free lingerie boutiqueMentionables Model-free lingerie (10% OFF CODE: BARTEL)🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Sarah speaks with My Delight alum Kristen, mother of eight, who shares her story of her and her husband's conversion, as well as how she grew through the My Delight course. Kristen felt pretty good about their love life before, but experienced insights, growth, learning, and increased connection with her husband. She shares what new evening routine they've developed that's been a game-changer and why there's a bottle of whipped cream in the fridge that she and her husband won't let the kids have. She also shares what some of the highlights were for her among the guest experts and conversations shared inside the My Delight course.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Sarah and Denise talk about self-care and body image. Denise a Catholic weight loss coach who helps women turn to God instead of food through her Weight Loss with the Holy Spirit program, 63 Surrendered program, and Restored Lent Challenge.  Restored helps women surrender to God, not the scale.Denise shares about how authentic self-care is not about expense and luxury--it's a sacred activity given to us by the Lord. She also shares about how we can change our negative thoughts about our body.Fast from the scale and experience the freedom and peace that come from surrendering fully to the Lord with Denise's Restored Lent Challenge! Learn more or join here.Use coupon code 63LENT for $20 off.You can also find Denise online at WeightLosswiththeHolySpirit.com🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

What is it like to go through My Delight as a happily married newlywed with a good love life? Is there still more to learn? Sarah chats with Dr. Jessica Whelan, a naturopath specializing in hormone health who is also a certified Creighton model FertiliCare NFP instructor and NaPro providor. They discuss being the higher-desire spouse, enjoying lovemaking while struggling with infertility and trying to conceive, and communicating about intimacy with your husband. Dr. Jessica shares what it is like to be in the sisterhood of Catholic women who go through My Delight together. Find out more about Dr. Jessica Whelan's hormone and fertility work at drwhelan.com🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Do you ever feel embarrassed when it comes to talking with your husband about lovemaking? Do you know how to ask for what you need... or communicate if something feels "meh" ... or even worse, hurts? Monica Ortega, co-host with her husband Renzo of the Two Become Family podcast, chats with Sarah about the book she and Renzo wrote: Lovemaking: How to Talk About Sex with Your Spouse. As a faithful Catholic couple informed by church teaching and theology of the body, they noticed that when it comes to candid and practical advice--there's still a lot to figure out! Sarah and Monica talk about mental load both spouses bear (as well as the gallant, swoon-worthy way husbands can help wives with their mental load!), feeding sexual intimacy with the whole-life intimacy that a couple builds outside the bedroom, and how to tell your husband when something gives you the heebie-jeebies. Lovemaking: How to Talk about Sex with Your Spouse, Ave Maria Press, 2025Two Become Family podcastCatholic women! Learn 9 Skills for Body, Mind and Spirit Enhancing Marital Intimacy with this free guide.Waitlist for Sarah's My Delight course for Catholic married and engaged women.🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Intimacy Insights for Brides-to-Be and Newlyweds: Expert Advice from Bridget Busacker, part 2 of 2.In this episode, I continue my interview with my lovely friend Bridget Busacker, founder of Managing Your Fertility. We chat about what we would tell newlywed or engaged women about sex and marriage. Join us as we imagine taking a bride-to-be out for coffee and consider what we would tell her about intimacy in marriage.  We share stories and practical tips to help build a joyful and connected intimate life. LINKS:Enhancing Intimacy Guide for Engaged and Married Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit, by Sarah BartelThe Newlywed Intimacy Blueprint by Bridget Busacker Managing Your Fertility.com, your one-stop shop for Fertility Awareness Resources for Women and Couples Find Bridget on Facebook: www.facebook.com/managingyourfertilityConnect with Bridget on Instagram: www.instagram.com/managingyourfertility 🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Intimacy Insights for Brides-to-Be and Newlyweds: Expert Advice from Bridget BusackerIn this episode, I interview my lovely friend Bridget Busacker, founder of Managing Your Fertility, to chat about what we would tell newlywed or engaged women about sex and marriage. Join us as we imagine taking a bride-to-be out for coffee and consider what we would tell her about the importance of communication, the essential role of foreplay, handling discomfort, and why it's so important a couple work together to make it a mutually enjoyable experience.  We share stories and practical tips to help build a joyful and connected intimate life. 00:00 Introduction to Bridget Busacker and Her Mission00:45 Discussing the Newlywed Intimacy Blueprint Course01:40 Advice for a Soon-to-be Married Woman03:31 Practical Tips for Intimacy and Foreplay15:00 Importance of Communication in Marriage19:36 Addressing Pain and Discomfort During Intercourse25:20 The Significance of Mutual Pleasure26:24 Conclusion and Final ThoughtsLinks:Enhancing Intimacy Guide for Engaged and Married Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit, by Sarah BartelThe Newlywed Intimacy Blueprint by Bridget Busacker Managing Your Fertility.com, your one-stop shop for Fertility Awareness Resources for Women and Couples Find Bridget on Facebook: www.facebook.com/managingyourfertilityConnect with Bridget on Instagram: www.instagram.com/managingyourfertility 🌸 free online Catholic marriage workshop: the Little Way of Marriage Learn how to do little marriage-building skills with great love, inspired by St. Thérèse, the Little Flower, and her holy parents, Sts. Louis and Zélie Martin! Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.

Ellen Holloway interviews host Sarah Bartel about how she got started helping Catholic married women improve their sex lives. She also interviews Sarah about her My Delight course for Catholic women. They talk about what happens inside the course and who the course is for. 👉 DOWNLOAD THE FREE GUIDE:Enhancing Marital Intimacy: 9 Skills for Mind, Body, and SpiritOr you can get your name on the My Delight waitlist to hear about when the next class of My Delight will be offered!My Delight WaitlistRegistration for Spring 2025 opens Feb 10-13, 2025!Support the showMORE RESOURCESFree Enhancing Marital Intimacy Guide for Catholic Women: 9 Skills for Body, Mind, and Spirit (for married and engaged women)Do you want to know what is allowed for Catholics in the bedroom? The "What's Allowed List" answers 20+ questions about what is licit and illicit. ($10)Model-free lingerie! Get 10% off with my affiliate link for Mentionables.