PODCAST · health
Single (not spiraling)
by Lauren Samantha
Welcome to Single Not Spiraling with Lauren—the podcast for women who are done waiting, done performing, and done pretending they’re not whole on their own. This is your space for honest conversations about decentering men, ditching the shame spiral, and building a life that turns you on—with or without a partner. We’re talking nervous system healing, unlearning the bullshit, dating without self-abandoning, and becoming the partner you’ve always wanted. It’s not about fixing you—it’s about finally accepting exactly who you are. So if you’ve ever felt behind, too much, or not enough—put your headphones in. You’re exactly where you’re meant to be!
Episodes
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Beyond the Rage: Black and White Thinking About Men and How to See the Gray | EP. 129
Black and white thinking about men can feel like the safest way to protect yourself, especially when the news has you furious and every headline makes it feel like you can't trust anyone. Your rage is valid, and I feel it too. Men need to be held accountable for the harm they cause, full stop.…
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How to Stop Obsessing Over Someone You Just Started Dating | EP. 128
You meet someone, it's going well, and somehow two weeks in you're checking your phone every ten minutes, replaying the last text, and low-key already spiraling and Obessesing. If that's you right now — this one's for you. in this episode we're talking about why early dating attachment hits so...
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Shrekking Dating Trend: Why Dating Less Attractive Guys Isn't the Fix | EP. 127
There's a new dating trend everywhere right now, and on the surface it sounds like solid advice: date the guy who's less conventionally hot, because he'll treat you better. Lauren stumbled on it mid-scroll while hunting for this week's topic, and had a lot of thoughts. This episode breaks down...
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What Season Are You In? Celibacy, Hoe Phase, Community, and How to Actually Know | EP. 126
Not every season calls for celibacy. Some call for community. Some call for a hoe phase. This one's about figuring out which season you're actually in, and why the advice going around right now isn't one-size-fits-all. Stay connected here Connect with me on Instagram Please email me here:...
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Staying Off the Apps When You Want Attention | EP. 125
Why is it so hard to just sit with yourself for one Tuesday night? This week I'm getting into what's actually happening when you reach for the dating apps — because half the time it's not about dating at all. It's about wanting proof someone's paying attention, wanting to feel wanted, wanting...
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How to Get Out of Your Single Girl Slump Era | EP. 124
Okay, real talk — you think you're not a creative person. You're wrong, and this episode is me proving it. Not another "get back out there and date" ep — this one's about getting out of your slump by making stuff instead of waiting to feel inspired. Creativity is why we're alive, and I want you…
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How to Make Friends as an Adult While You're Single and Decentering Men | EP. 123
You're doing the work of decentering men, but who's actually in your corner while you do it? This week Lauren gets into the friendship gap nobody talks about — why it happens, why it's harder to fix than you'd think, and what it actually takes to build real community as an adult. Spoiler: it...
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The Sunk Cost Fallacy: Why You Stay Long After You Know | EP.122
Why is it so hard to walk away from something once you've put time into it — even when you already know it's not right? This week we're getting into the sunk cost fallacy, the concept that explains why staying can feel safer than leaving, even when staying is the actual cost. Inspired by a…
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The Fear of Aging Is a Lie. Here's What Getting Older Actually Gives You | EP.121
You've been told your whole life that getting older is something to fight off. That your value has a shelf life. That younger is better, more desirable, more worth something. And most of us absorbed that without even questioning where it came from or who it was built to benefit. In this episode...
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The Relationship You're Already In (Whether You Notice It or Not) | EP. 120
You're already in a relationship, whether you've clocked it or not — the one with yourself. This episode is about what happens when you start treating that relationship with the same attention you'd give someone you're dating, and what actually shifts when you do. Stay connected here Connect with...
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Information Overload and the Single Woman: When Self-Help Stops Helping | EP. 119
We are consuming more than ever. More content, more frameworks, more steps, more systems. And a lot of it is genuinely useful — but at some point the volume of it stops helping you and starts working against you. Especially when you're a single woman who is already trying really hard.In this...
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Putting Yourself First: Codependency, Conditioning, and Learning to Make Yourself the Priority | EP.118
Putting yourself first sounds simple until you actually try to do it. If you've ever said yes when you meant no, shrunk your own needs down before anyone even asked you to, or felt a wave of guilt the second you did something for yourself — this episode is for you. Lauren breaks down why so many...
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Why You Keep Spiraling Over Men And How the Empowerment Dynamic Finally Stops It | EP. 117
You've been spiraling and you know it — the overanalyzing, the waiting, the feeling like you have zero control over how your own life feels. This episode hands you the framework that changed everything for me and for so many of my clients. We're talking about the Drama Triangle, why you're…
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Why a Secure Man Won't Be Threatened By You Being a Man Hater | EP: 116
If you've been holding back from fully doing this work, this episode is for you. Today Lauren is getting into why a capable, secure man is not going to be threatened by you being a self-proclaimed man hater, where male insecurity actually comes from and why it has nothing to do with you, and why...
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Your Relationship Just Ended. Here's Exactly What to Do. | EP. 115
Something Lauren keeps noticing: when women go through a breakup, they find themselves again. They go back to the things they'd stopped doing — the hobby, the book, the version of themselves that got a little buried somewhere in the relationship. This episode is a guide for anyone who's newly out...
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Single in Your 30s and 40s: What It Really Takes to Stop Spiraling and Come Home to Yourself | EP: 114
In this episode Lauren gets real about what the work actually looks like — not the highlight reel version, not the "I healed and now everything is great" version, but the real thing. She walks you through the specific areas she works on with her clients every single day: breaking the fantasy of…
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Decentering Men Q&A: Your Biggest Questions, Answered | EP. 113
You've been asking Lauren questions about decentering men — how to talk about it, what actually changed first, whether your relationships survive it — and today she's answering them. If you're on the fence about decentering men or you're already doing the work and want to go deeper, this is a...
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Now That You've Decentered Men, Whimsy The F*ck Out Of Your Life | EP. 112
You've been doing the work. Decentering men, healing, growing, showing up for yourself. But when's the last time your life actually felt magical? In this episode we're talking about whimsy — what it actually is, why your space matters more than you think, and how to stop living inside your...
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Dating a Woman Who Has Decentered Men: A Man's Perspective | EP. 111
What does it actually look like to date a woman who is decentering men? My boyfriend Joey joins me to answer that — from his side. He's confident, he's not threatened, and he has some honest opinions about what being a good partner actually means (spoiler: it's not doing the dishes). If you've…
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Does Your Life Actually Suck Or Are You Just On Social Media Too Much | EP. 110
Does your life actually suck or are you just on social media too much? Because I think for a lot of women it's the second one and we don't even realize it's happening. In this episode I get into what comparing yourself to everyone online is actually costing you, why it keeps getting mistaken for...
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Is It Rational to Be Afraid of Men? Fear, Dating, and Discernment |EP. 109
This week's episode is Single (not spiraling), I'm answering a question a listener wrote in with — she'd seen a lot of manosphere content come across her feed, found it useful at first, and then realized she was just scared of men and didn't know how to navigate dating anymore. We get into why…
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Why Women Who Hold Space For Everyone Burn Out The Hardest | EP. 108
If you've been feeling flat, uninspired, and like everything — even the things you used to love — has started to feel like a chore, this episode is for you. Lauren recorded this one burnt out, seven clients deep into her week, because sometimes the most honest thing you can do is talk about the...
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I Have Some Feelings And You're Going To Hear Them (Sorry Not Sorry) |EP 107
This week Lauren is just talking. No theme, no structure — she's sharing what's been on her mind lately: being tired of centering men in the conversation, and why increasing your pleasure as a single woman actually matters. Stay connected here Connect with me on Instagram Please email me here:...
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Why The F*ck Does It Feel So Abnormal To Decenter Men (& What To Do About It) | EP. 106
You have started decentering men but something feels off. Weird. Like you are going against everything you were taught and even your own body is like — what are we doing. In this episode Lauren Samantha gets into exactly why decentering men feels so unnatural — and it has nothing to do with you...
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Decentering Romance Step By Step: How To Date Without Losing Yourself | EP. 105
You understood everything we talked about in part one. And then you opened the apps and lost yourself in whether he texted back. That is exactly what this episode is about.We are getting into what decentering romance actually looks like when you are actively dating. The patterns you keep…
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The First Step to Decentering Men? Decentering Romance| EP. 104
If you've been doing the work of decentering men but feel like something isn't clicking, this is the episode you need. Because the first step to decentering men is decentering romance — and most of us have never even questioned the story we were sold about what our lives are supposed to look...
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What Would a Matriarchal World Look Like? How Women Are Reimagining Power, Care, and Community Beyond Patriarchy| EP. 103
What if your burnout isn't a personal failure — it's a system doing exactly what it was designed to do? In this episode, Lauren unpacks how patriarchy and capitalism condition women to over-function, under-rest, and tie their worth to productivity. She explores what a matriarchal value system…
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Stuck Between Wanting Love and Loving Being Single in Your 30s | EP. 102
In your 30s, something shifts. You’ve done the therapy. You’ve built the self-worth. You’ve stopped settling for emotionally unavailable men. And now you find yourself in a strange in-between — loving your independence but still craving real partnership. In this episode, I’m talking about the...
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Self-Trust, Standards, and Not Settling for Mediocre Love | EP.101
In this episode of Single, Not Spiraling, we’re talking about self-trust, standards, and what it actually means to stop settling for mediocre love. Decentering men isn’t about rejecting partnership — it’s about building enough internal safety that you’re no longer making decisions from anxiety,...
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Internal vs External Validation: Why You Don’t Trust Yourself Yet | EP. 100
We talk a lot about “self-validation,” but no one really explains what that means in real life. This episode breaks down internal vs external validation, why relying on other people to confirm your feelings is so tempting, and how to start trusting your own reactions without over-explaining or...
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Healing Isn’t the End Goal. Living Is | EP. 99
You’ve read the books. You’ve listened to the podcasts. You understand the concepts. So why does it still feel hard to move? In this episode, we talk about the space between knowing and living — why consuming self-help can quietly turn into avoidance, how burnout and world chaos make action feel...
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What Do You No Longer Tolerate That You Once Normalized? Dating, Boundaries & Self-Trust. | EP. 98
In this episode of Single (Not Spiraling), we talk about the moment you realize the things you once accepted in dating no longer feel okay. From inconsistency and emotional unavailability to over-explaining, self-abandonment, and confusing anxiety for chemistry, this episode explores what it...
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Can You Date and Decenter Men at the Same Time? Here’s What It Actually Looks Like | Ep. 97
Can you date and still decenter men — or does one cancel out the other? In this episode, I share what it’s actually looked like for me to date without losing myself, spiraling, or making romance the center of my life. We talk about how to stay grounded, how to notice when old patterns creep in…
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Am I Single Because My Standards Are Too High? | EP.96
Are you single because your standards are too high — or because you finally have some? In this short episode, we talk about why so many grounded women are told to lower the bar, how dating culture creates self-doubt, and how to tell the difference between having standards and self-abandoning just...
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Choosing an Intentional Life in 2026 as a Single Woman (with out burning out) | EP. 95
If you’re a single woman heading into the new year and feeling burned out by goals, pressure, and “fix yourself” energy — this episode is for you. In this episode, I talk about how to want more without turning your life into a constant self-improvement project. We unpack why joyless goals lead to...
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If You’re a Single Woman, Let Me De-Influence You About the New Year & January Pressure | EP.94
If you’re a single woman feeling pressure to have everything figured out at the start of the year, this episode is for you. In this episode of Single, Not Spiraling, Lauren de-influences New Year and January pressure, unpacks hustle culture and wellness overload, and explores how single women can...
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Feeling Invisible During the Holidays as a Single Woman: When Traditions Change & Heartache Hits | EP. 94
In this episode, we’re getting real about the kind of holiday hurt no one talks about — the moment you’re surrounded by family and still feel invisible. When traditions change without you, everyone else is coupling up or having kids, and you’re left navigating a season that doesn’t feel like…
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A Lover Girl’s Guide to Surviving the Holidays as a Single Woman | EP. 93
Listen… if you’ve been feeling off this holiday season and can’t really explain why? You’re not alone. This episode is for my single girls navigating weird family dynamics, annoying party invites, pressure to buy gifts no one wants, and the ache that shows up when you’re not anyone’s plus one....
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Decentering Men, Healing Yourself, and Building a Life That’s Actually Yours | EP. 92
So apparently, “decentering men” is tired now. A trend. A phase. Except… we’re still watching women shape-shift to be chosen by men who can’t name their emotions or wash their legs. This episode is for the woman who's done orbiting her life around being picked. We’re talking about what…
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Did I Heal Too Much? What Happens When You Outgrow Dysfunction | EP. 91
If you’ve ever wondered, “Did I heal too much? Is that why dating feels so hard now?”—this episode is for you. We’re getting into what it really means to outgrow chaos, stop chasing the high of anxious attachment, and hold out for the kind of love that actually feels safe. It’s not that you’re…
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Grief, Single Girl Edition |EP. 90
What if the sadness you’re feeling isn’t just about being single... but about grieving the life you thought you’d have by now? In this episode of Single, Not Spiraling, we’re talking about disenfranchised grief—the kind that doesn’t get talked about because there’s no funeral, no breakup, no...
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10 Things Every Single Woman Needs (And It’s Not a Relationship) | EP. 89
This one’s personal. It’s a love letter, a pep talk, and a little bit of a call-out. After being single for a long time (hi, 7 years), I’ve learned that confidence doesn’t come from someone choosing you—it comes from building a life that turns you on without waiting for them to show up. In this...
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Single Girl Finances: Unpacking the Shame Around Debt (Without Hating Yourself) | EP. 88
Money isn’t just math — it’s emotional, messy, and wrapped in way more shame than most of us want to admit. In this episode of Single, Not Spiraling, I’m getting brutally honest about what it means to navigate debt, guilt, and survival-mode spending as a single woman. We’re talking about why…
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Would You Date You? Pt.3 Define Your Non Negotiables Or Keep Settling |EP. 87
Still waiting for someone to pick you? This episode is your wake-up call. Lauren Samantha is calling out the toxic dating patterns that keep women performing, shrinking, and settling—just to be liked. In this raw, no-BS episode, we unpack how to stop dating from fear, define your real...
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Would You Date You? Pt. 2: Stop Starving Your Needs to Seem Desirable | EP. 86
You're out here saying you want a partner who’s emotionally available, who prioritizes your needs, who makes you feel sexy, seen, and safe… but are you doing any of that for yourself? In this episode, Lauren Samantha rips the bow off self-love and gets real about what it actually means to be...
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Would You Date You? Pt 1: Are You Becoming The Partner You Crave EP| 85
You say you want someone emotionally available… but are you emotionally available to yourself? In this raw and reflective first episode of the Would You Date You? series, Lauren Samantha cracks open what it really means to become the kind of partner you’re out here looking for. No fluff. No...
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What If Nothing’s Wrong With You? But You Still Need to Change Some Sh*t! (Welcome to Single Not Spiraling)| Ep. 84
Ever cried in the Trader Joe’s parking lot because your ex moved on and you’re still wondering if love is even in the cards for you? Same. In this first episode of Single Not Spiraling, Lauren Samantha kicks things off with a brutally honest conversation about what it really means to be single...
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The End of Pleasure Pathways (And the Beginning of Something New) EP.83
After 82 episodes, today marks the end of an era—and the beginning of something I didn’t see coming. In this final episode of Pleasure Pathways, I’m looking back at how it all started (yes, mushrooms were involved), what this show cracked open in me, and why I know it’s time to pivot. But don’t...
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The History of Pleasure: How We Lost It—and What It Takes to Get It Back | EP. 82
In this episode, we trace the history of pleasure—from Ancient Greece and goddess worship, to the Puritans, patriarchy, and purity culture. You’ll hear how joy became shame, how desire got pathologized, and how women’s sensuality was stripped down to silence. We talk about how women have fought…
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The Body Comments That Stick With Us—and How to Shake Them Off | EP. 81
Ever had someone say something about your body that stuck with you for way too long? Same. This week on Pleasure Pathways, I’m sharing two real moments: → When my parents made comments about my swimsuit → And the surprising comments I got from women at girls’ boat day This episode is about how…
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
Welcome to Single Not Spiraling with Lauren—the podcast for women who are done waiting, done performing, and done pretending they’re not whole on their own.
This is your space for honest conversations about decentering men, ditching the shame spiral, and building a life that turns you on—with or without a partner.
We’re talking nervous system healing, unlearning the bullshit, dating without self-abandoning, and becoming the partner you’ve always wanted. It’s not about fixing you—it’s about finally accepting exactly who you are. So if you’ve ever felt behind, too much, or not enough—put your headphones in. You’re exactly where you’re meant to be!
HOSTED BY
Lauren Samantha
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does Single (not spiraling) have?
Single (not spiraling) currently has 132 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is Single (not spiraling) about?
Welcome to Single Not Spiraling with Lauren—the podcast for women who are done waiting, done performing, and done pretending they’re not whole on their own. This is your space for honest conversations about decentering men, ditching the shame spiral, and building a life that turns you on—with or...
How often does Single (not spiraling) release new episodes?
Single (not spiraling) publishes regularly with 132 episodes available. Check the episode list for the typical release schedule.
Where can I listen to Single (not spiraling)?
You can listen to Single (not spiraling) on PodParley by clicking any episode. We provide an embedded audio player for direct listening, and you can also subscribe via your preferred podcast app using the RSS feed.
Who hosts Single (not spiraling)?
Single (not spiraling) is created and hosted by Lauren Samantha.
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