PODCAST · health
fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress
by Monica Bahan
My name is Monica, and in the enneagram of personality I’m a self-preservation 5w4. Long story short: I tend to self-sabotage by avoiding vulnerability, observing rather than participating, doubting my knowledge, overanalyzing, minimizing my needs, over-focusing on details, and being stubbornly independent. But I'm tired of getting in my own way. So here I am, opening myself up, taking risks, and sharing reflections and wisdom along the way. With plenty of mixed metaphors and minimal editing—by design and out of necessity.
Episodes
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28. Info binges and social needs
I’m chewing on this question: Are all “information binges” attempts to get social needs met? Reflecting on my most recent period of deep receptivity and the fragments of community I found within it. Use what moves you, let go of the rest. And let me know what resonates. ✨ Instagram: @un.fiving...
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27. Dating advice for Fives (part 3)
Learn to recognize the stories that carry fear and keep you from risking close relationships. Reach past them into spirit—toward your highest values and the most expansive and free evolution of yourself. Cultivate your strength and connection to intuition by spending time with your points of...
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26. Dating advice for Fives (part 2)
“You’re gorgeous! And you deserve a relationship that allows you to be gorgeous in the way that only you are and to share your gifts that only you have to give. Anything short of that is short of that.” A continuation of the previous episode, with more detail, exploration, practices for real…
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25. Dating advice for Fives (part 1)
This one is all about the first stage of dating: preparing. If you want your dating life to look different or bring a different outcome, take a pause and reorient. I give you a few tips and starting places in this episode, including: - Let your mind know what you’re doing and get its support…
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24. Shift happens
Announcing a shift: I’m adjusting my focus so that my primary goal is delivering helpful tips, wisdom, reflections, and guidance to help you as you journey along in your Fiveness or search for more insight into Enneagram Fives. I’ll include specific and sometimes personal examples or stories to...
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23. Sometimes clutter is trauma
Mentions: Euphoria, Harry Potter, Rick Hanson, Tara Brach
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22. Ebb and flow
Reflections on breaking norms, hormone surges, right timing, shifting between stability and upheaval, navigating by starlight, the hard work of embodying intentions, and probably a few other things I’m forgetting right now.
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21. Decluttering, inside and out
More rambling reflections from this spiral of personal evolution. 💗 Instagram: @un.fiving Music by Sleeping at Last
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20. Parts of us
This week I’m wading deeper into parts work and relating to my ever-changing inner states from a place of wholeness. This shift from being merged with a feeling to being in relationship with it is a powerful one: it opens up a world of possibilities and allows the feeling to deliver its message…
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19. Another prime
I’m addressing my inner skeptics with gratitude and farewells as I reconnect with forgotten ways of caring for myself. I'm also exploring how to honor my inner work while stepping into more outer work: expressing, collaborating, connecting, expanding, engaging, impacting, and making bold moves.…
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18. Defang your shame animal
A simple, fun exercise to shift your relationship to the shame and fear getting in your way and strengthen your connection to what freedom feels like for you. Let me know if you find it helpful! Instagram: @un.fiving Music by Sleeping at Last
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17. Priming
I’m taking a step back to look at the forest, then refocusing on the trees. Setting my values and finding inspiration for the next stretch of my path. ✨ Mentioned in this episode: Jen Sincero - “In order to kick ass, you must first lift up your foot.” Martha Beck - The idea that a tiny, one…
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16. Rest week
I’m taking it easy this week, surrendering to the needs of my immune system. 🌸 As always, Music by Sleeping at Last Production by me, Monica Bahan
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15. Independence and self-limitation
I’ve been noticing how much I try to avoid relying on anyone or anything and how by subconsciously keeping money tight I both reinforce and undermine that avoidance. I desperately want to break these habits, and I think interdependence with others is the path through the independence-dependence...
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14. Coming back with fresh intentions
Anxiety and self-doubt kept me away, but I’m back and have a few new intentions for the podcast going forward. 🌸 Music by Sleeping At Last Everything else by me, Monica Bahan Email: [email protected] Instagram: @un.fiving
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13. What fiving means to me (part 2)
First, more thoughts on the enneagram frame as I experience it: - Subtypes/instinctual variants: self-preservation (individual), sexual (one-to-one), and social (collective). My attention stack goes in that order: self-preservation first—so I'm a self-preservation subtype of the 5—then sexual…
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12. What fiving means to me (part 1)
What I mean when I say I’m an enneagram 5 with a 4 wing (5w4): revisiting the foundational conceptual frame for this podcast. The episode ends with the full song “Five” by Sleeping At Last (with a run time 5:55, of course). Tendencies include: Hoarding ideas, dreams, favors, credits, intellectual...
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11. I got lost
It’s been a while. I was coping with a down shift in support, focused on getting through each day without major problems, and working my way through a couple major problems that did crop up, including crises of confidence and direction. I grappled with hormonal chaos and destabilization in my...
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10. Dismantling personality, building self
A brief follow-up to Episode 9. A reflection on some of the ways I fostered a healthy relationship to self, and how that was necessary for engaging with the enneagram of personality as a channel for growth. Before you deconstruct your ego you have to build a robust relationship to self so you…
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9. Reframing gratitude
Ugh. Are you as tired of hearing about gratitude as I am? No? Cool. Either way, I’m gonna tell you about how buzz words turn me off and how I’ve opened up the concept of gratitude to build something meaningful and essential to my me-ness in a way that works for me. Also a preview of some ideas...
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8. A wet wing moment
Meandering thoughts—on a meandering walk—on one of my growth edges and the attainability of my goal of financial independence; seeing parallels/metaphors in the natural world. Let me know what resonates. 🌸 Background photo by me, Monica, the day of editing Music by Sleeping At Last Production by...
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7. You can’t go back
We all yearn to go back sometimes, to when things were good, to when we felt better, to before the loss. We can’t go back. But, if we listen, the yearning can show us the way forward. I give a few examples of yearning to go back and explore how our fear and loss can point to what we value, what...
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6. Dating and decluttering
I’m approaching dating as a single/solo mom, first conceptually and then in real time (maybe). I have a strong sense that decluttering has to come first—internal and external decluttering, clearing, organizing, and arranging to achieve harmony and carry less baggage. But can dating and…
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5. The brain, the enneagram, human design, and a story
I talk about how I see the enneagram of personality—that we become our type through an interaction of our innate personality and early life experience, and that it’s all about where we get stuck and how to get unstuck; the difference in perspective between the right and left hemispheres of the...
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4. Open language: your personal lexicon
Accuracy in language is especially important for we sensitive folk (and maybe even more so for wee sensitive folk ☺️). Pay attention to the words you use, both with yourself and others, and get to know your personal lexicon. Words move you, so choose language that gets you where you want to go.…
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3. Shifting frames: exploration and open language
I felt disoriented and uprooted this week, so I sat by the river and came back to myself. I remembered that my mission with this podcast is exploration in the spirit of freedom and generosity. That clarity brought excitement and inspiration with it, particularly around unpacking language and bits...
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2. Growth spins
This is all so new to me! 😬 In the course of recording and preparing this episode, I’ve felt excited, nervous, doubtful, brave, trusting, clear, resonant, free, expansive, exhilarated, delighted, terrified, ashamed, lonely, hopeful, connected, grateful, centered, curious, optimistic, motivated,...
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1. Welcome
Hellooo! Welcome! My name is Monica, and I’m a self-preservation 5w4 in the enneagram of personality. I’m clearing out internal clutter and stepping out of my cave of self-limitation, sharing reflections and wisdom nuggets along the way. With plenty of mixed metaphors and minimal editing—by...
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ABOUT THIS SHOW
My name is Monica, and in the enneagram of personality I’m a self-preservation 5w4. Long story short: I tend to self-sabotage by avoiding vulnerability, observing rather than participating, doubting my knowledge, overanalyzing, minimizing my needs, over-focusing on details, and being stubbornly independent. But I'm tired of getting in my own way. So here I am, opening myself up, taking risks, and sharing reflections and wisdom along the way. With plenty of mixed metaphors and minimal editing—by design and out of necessity.
HOSTED BY
Monica Bahan
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Frequently Asked Questions
How many episodes does fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress have?
fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress currently has 28 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
What is fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress about?
My name is Monica, and in the enneagram of personality I’m a self-preservation 5w4. Long story short: I tend to self-sabotage by avoiding vulnerability, observing rather than participating, doubting my knowledge, overanalyzing, minimizing my needs, over-focusing on details, and being stubbornly...
How often does fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress release new episodes?
fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress has 28 episodes. Check the episode list to see recent publication dates and frequency.
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Who hosts fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress?
fiving: an enneagram 5 in progress is created and hosted by Monica Bahan.
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