Thanks for Sharing

For a lot of people, those are surprisingly difficult questions to answer. Sometimes we genuinely don't know. Sometimes we know, but we've learned to keep parts of ourselves private. Sometimes we've gotten very good at figuring out what's practical, reasonable, available, or best for everyone else before we consider what we actually want. And sometimes "be grateful" quietly became "don't want more." In this episode of Thanks for Sharing, I'm talking about how we can become wantless and needless—and the different ways that can show up. We talk about needs versus wants, gratitude, entitlement, vulnerability, the unshared self, and why knowing what you want doesn't mean you expect to get it. Because our wants aren't just about getting things. They're often clues to who we are.  When You Don’t Know What You Want: Becoming Wantless and Needless    Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links #ThanksForSharingPodcast #SelfAbandonment #SelfAwareness #EmotionalHealth #Relationships #Healing

There's a moment almost everyone knows: someone says something, and before you've even processed it, you're already deciding not to react. You smile. You let it go. And somewhere in that quiet moment, you might be abandoning yourself. In this episode, I talk about the difference between self-abandonment (the pattern) and self-betrayal (the moment-by-moment choice that builds it) — and why understanding that difference matters more than most people realize. We get into: → Why "it's best to just move on" is sometimes wisdom, and sometimes a trauma response wearing wisdom's clothes → The beliefs running underneath this pattern — not lovable, don't matter, too much, stay small, won't be accepted if truly known → What your body already knows before your mind catches up → A real client story that shows what this looks like even inside a good, functioning relationship → And a small story from my own dinner table about catching yourself mid-betrayal — and going back to fix it This isn't about always speaking up. It's about knowing the difference between a real choice and an old belief making the decision for you. New episode is live — link in bio. Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links   #selfabandonment #selfbetrayal #therapy #mentalhealth #relationships #differentiation #authenticity #innerchild #podcastepisode #healingjourney  

Your "difficult" child might just be determined. Your "too much" might just be someone who hasn't finished growing into her enthusiasm yet. In this episode, I talk about the difference between adaptation and development,  why the traits that got labeled as problems in childhood (stubborn, dramatic, bossy, shy) were often never the problem at all. They just hadn't matured yet. We go deep: reparenting, the functional adult, why insight alone doesn't change us, and why healing was never about becoming someone new, but about continuing to grow into who you already were. New episode is live   link in bio https://healingpathsrecovery.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/07/Helping-the-Authentic-Self-Mature.pdf   Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links   #therapy #reparenting #authenticself #innerchildwork #mentalhealthawareness #healingjourney #familytherapy #podcastepisode

The deepest injury of narcissistic neglect isn't what happened to you. It's what never consistently happened for you. Nobody wondering what you were thinking. Nobody asking what you felt. Nobody staying curious about who you were becoming. And when those thousands of small moments are largely absent, something else develops in their place. Not a self. An adaptation. An identity organized around keeping the peace, managing moods, and becoming whoever the room needed you to be. If you grew up wondering why you can't answer simple questions about yourself — what you want, what you like, what you feel,  this episode is for you. Today I'm talking about what narcissistic neglect actually does to a developing child, why it so often comes from mothers and goes unrecognized, what develops instead of a healthy sense of self, and why the conversation you want to have with your parent rarely gives you what you're hoping for. Development doesn't end in childhood. And healing isn't becoming someone different — it's finally uncovering the person who never had enough room to emerge.   Link in bio.   Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links #narcissisticneglect #adultchildrenofnarcissists #attachmenthealing #emotionalneglect #narcissisticmother #therapy #selfhealing #childhoodtrauma #mentalhealth #innerchild

In this episode, Rachel joins Jackie as they dive into the intricacies of early recovery in therapy. In this episode, they discuss the foundational stages of addiction recovery, focusing on the challenges faced by individuals new to therapy.  From addressing justification and rationalization to the role of accountability, Jackie and Rachel offer insights into the vital components that set the stage for long-term sobriety and deep recovery. Whether you're a therapist or someone at the beginning of a recovery journey, this conversation serves as a reminder of the importance of revisiting the basics.  Tune in to explore how early steps pave the way for meaningful change and lasting growth.   Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

That question has been on my mind after two clients asked me to record this episode. For some of us, touch meant comfort and safety. For others, it meant obligation, manipulation, or even fear. Some of us grew up in families that hugged all the time. Others rarely experienced physical affection. And sometimes, it wasn't the presence or absence of touch that mattered most—it was what that touch came to mean. In this episode, I explore:  What our families teach us about touch  Why healthy relationships respect "not yet"  How our earliest experiences become our first map of relationships  Why our adaptations made sense—and why they don't have to define us  How healing happens one safe relationship at a time   One of the ideas I keep coming back to is this: Children don't just survive their families. They mistake their families for the whole world. The good news is that our first map doesn't have to be our final one. I'd love to hear from you: What did touch teach you about relationships growing up?  Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links   #Attachment #HealingJourney #TraumaRecovery #Relationships #EmotionalHealth #Therapy #MentalHealth #ChildhoodTrauma #Connection #Boundaries #PersonalGrowth #ThanksForSharingPodcast  

Changing your patterns doesn't just change you. It changes the relationships around you.   One of the biggest surprises in healing is that being healthier doesn't always feel better, at least not at first. The people around you have learned the old dance just as much as you have. So when you stop over-explaining, caretaking, shutting down, or apologizing for everything, the relationship often wobbles before it finds a new rhythm. That doesn't mean you're doing it wrong. It means the choreography is changing. In this final episode of my four-part series, we explore: • Why healthy change can create tension • How family systems respond when you break old rules • Why other people's reactions don't have to determine your growth • How to stay grounded in your second response, even when others aren't sure what to do with the new you One of the biggest lessons I've had to learn is this: Being needed isn't the same as being loved. Changing that belief didn't just change me; it changed the expectations inside some of my relationships. Growth doesn't happen in isolation. It happens one relationship at a time.  Listen wherever you get your podcasts or watch the full episode on YouTube.  Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode?   #Healing #Relationships #Attachment #TraumaRecovery #NervousSystem #Differentiation #FamilySystems #PersonalGrowth #MentalHealth #Therapy #CouplesTherapy #Boundaries #EmotionalHealth #ThanksForSharingPodcast 

You can understand your pattern completely. You can know exactly where it came from, what it's protecting you from, why it shows up the way it does. And still, in the moment, you do the thing anyway. That's because understanding a pattern and interrupting it are two different skills. And interrupting it and actually replacing it — building something to put in its place — that's a third skill entirely. That's what this episode is about. The second response isn't a version of you that shows up once you've healed enough. It's a direction. Something small and specific and chosen, built from a value you actually hold, practiced in moments that don't matter so that it's available when they do. This week: what do you keep losing when the pattern wins? That answer is usually pointing straight at what you're building toward.    Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

Understanding your patterns is one thing. Interrupting them in real time is something else entirely. In this episode, we talk about the tiny space between the trigger and the reaction — and how to find it, use it, and slowly make it bigger.    Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links  

Why can you understand your behaviors and still repeat them: You can explain exactly why you do it. And then you do it again.   That's not a character flaw. It's the difference between insight and integration, and they are not the same thing. In this episode, I'm talking about why understanding your patterns doesn't automatically change them, what's actually happening in your nervous system when insight isn't enough, and the real mechanisms that create lasting change — including corrective experience, practicing in activated states, and why repair might be the most underestimated part of healing. If you've ever thought "I know this stuff, so why do I keep doing it?" — this one's for you.  [link in bio]  Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links  

I said that in a men's group a few years ago — and the room went silent. Everyone immediately understood what it meant to organize your life around being needed. What surprised me was what came next: when I introduced the idea of being chosen — freely, without obligation — some of the men weren't just skeptical. They weren't sure relationships like that actually existed. They had seen duty. Obligation. Dependence. But they weren't sure they'd ever witnessed two fully functioning adults who simply wanted each other. This episode is about the difference between being needed and being loved — and what it costs us when we confuse the two. New episode is live. Link in bio.  Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links #attachmenttheory #codependency #relationships #emotionalhealth #mentalhealth #therapy #beingneeded #beingloved #securelove #selfworth

"All behavior makes sense. And if it doesn't make sense yet — we keep asking questions until it does." This is one of the phrases I say most in my work, and in this episode I'm unpacking where it actually came from. Not grad school. Life. I'm sharing two stories that changed how I see people — one from a cassette tape in my car, and one from a borrowed office and a father who asked me point-blank what he smelled like. Both of them taught me the same thing: behavior doesn't live in a vacuum. It lives inside a context. And once you understand the context, almost everything makes sense. This one is for therapists, parents, and anyone who has ever written someone off before they understood them — including themselves. New episode is live. Link in bio.  #podcast #therapist #mentalhealth #curiosity #allbehaviormakessense #therapy #selfawareness #attachmenttheory #nervoussystem #healing      Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links      

In this episode, we explore the difference between values and beliefs — and why that distinction matters so deeply in healing, recovery, relationships, and identity. We talk about: • Survival beliefs formed in childhood • The gap between who you want to be and what feels possible • Compliance-based identities • Emotional reality being deprioritized in families and systems • Why coping patterns often hide deeper values • The voices from the past that still shape how we live and love • And how healing is often the process of finding your way back to yourself This episode is for anyone who has ever wondered: “Is this actually who I am… or just who I had to become?”  Listen now on Thanks for Sharing.   Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links   #healing #traumahealing #attachment #betrayaltrauma #therapy #mentalhealth #selfawareness #relationships #innerchildhealing #recovery #emotionalhealth #psychology #healingjourney #codependency #jackiepack

In this episode, we explore the quiet loneliness of being surrounded by people who don't really know you, the fear underneath the masks we wear, and what it ttakes to build the kind of friendship that survives time, change, and all the complicated business of being human. Plus: the girls' weekend nobody talks honestly about, a friendship that didn't just fade but detonated, and a personal reckoning with what it means to be a therapist trying to have friends who aren't. No listicles. Just an honest conversation about one of the most important and most complicated things in a life.  Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

You did the hard thing. You said it. And then you felt worse. That guilt, that dread, that urge to immediately walk it back — that's not a sign you did something wrong. It's your nervous system doing exactly what it was designed to do. Just not for the life you're trying to build. In today's episode, I'm breaking down the 7 reasons the aftermath of a boundary feels like a crisis:  the grief, the identity disruption, the fear of abandonment, the cognitive dissonance, and what's actually happening in your body when a familiar dynamic gets disrupted. Because nobody told us the relief doesn't come right away. And that silence has led many people to give up on themselves too soon. New episode is out now. Link in bio.    Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links  

There’s a moment most people don’t talk about. When what you believed… stops holding. Not because you’re broken. Not because you’ve failed. But because you can finally see. Disillusionment isn’t the end of something. It’s the beginning of seeing clearly. And the people who have the courage to stay in that space— not rush to fix it, numb it, or replace it— are often the ones who understand the world the most deeply. This episode is about: • What it means to wake up to reality • Why disillusionment can feel destabilizing • And how people who go through it can actually help build something more honest and solid If you’ve been questioning things lately… this one is for you.   Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

Why do some people still get to you… even after you’ve done the work? It’s not just about “triggers.” And it’s not just about setting boundaries either. Sometimes it’s: – being around someone you don’t trust – navigating tension with someone you love – watching a relationship change in ways you didn’t expect – or trying to stay grounded when your past and present are both getting activated This episode is about something deeper than coping: How we build the capacity to stay connected to ourselves in relationships that feel complicated, unresolved, or emotionally charged. Because real healing isn’t: avoiding people or just getting through interactions It’s learning how to: – regulate instead of endure – stay grounded without shutting down – protect yourself without abandoning yourself If relationships have ever made you question yourself, second-guess your reactions, or feel like you lose access to who you are, this one will land.  Link in bio   Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

Most people think lying is a choice. But for many people, it doesn’t even pass through conscious thought. It starts in the body.  A flush  A tightening  A sense of threat And the truth doesn’t feel like an option. In this episode, I talk about something I often say:  “I came by my dishonesty honestly.” Not to excuse it— but to understand it. Because for many of us:   Truth didn’t always feel safe Being fully seen felt risky And connection sometimes depended on what we didn’t say  And for partners? Dishonesty doesn’t just hurt. It makes you question reality.  Was any of this real?  Have they just been telling me what I want to hear? Wanting honesty isn’t controlling. It’s about trying to build a relationship on something real.  Here’s what I’ve learned: As the truth reveals itself, it can be very painful. But it also settles you. It settles your nervous system. Because you’re no longer trying to hold together something that doesn’t quite fit. If this resonates, this episode is for you.    Link in bio   Comment “truth” if this resonated    Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

In this episode, I share a conversation I had as a guest on The Wholeness Network, where we talk about patriarchy—not as a buzzword, but as something that quietly shapes how we love, how we show up, and what we believe we’re allowed to need. This shows up in my work all the time: • men who were never taught emotional depth but are expected to create connection • women who carry the weight of relational responsibility • couples who personalize patterns that are actually bigger than both of them And here’s the tension: even when the system shaped us… healing is still personal. If you’ve ever felt stuck in the same relational patterns and couldn’t quite explain why—this conversation might give you language for that.  Full episode at the link in bio   The Wholeness Network link:  https://www.thewholenessnetwork.com/   Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

People don’t leave therapy because it’s not working. Sometimes they leave because it’s getting too close to what matters. And sometimes… they stay. But still feel like something is missing. You might: understand your patterns have more awareness even be making progress …but not actually feel different. That’s not failure. It’s the difference between insight and integration. In this episode, I talk about: why “being ready” isn’t enough why trauma work requires preparation, not just willingness how going too fast can actually reinforce the problem why addicts and betrayed partners need different pacing and why the relationship—not just the model—matters Healing doesn’t happen just because you go into the trauma. It happens when your system can stay open long enough for something new to take hold. If you’ve ever thought: “I’ve done a lot of work… so why does this still feel incomplete?” This episode is for you.  Link in bio Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

We keep asking: How could this happen? But maybe the better question is… Why are we still surprised? When the Epstein files resurfaced, I saw a lot of shock, even in professional circles. Names people admired. People who built identities around wisdom, healing, or influence. I texted my friend Rachel and asked, “Are you surprised?” Her response: “I am never surprised when a male spiritual guru, leader, or pastor turns out to be a sexual predator.” That stopped me.  Because I wasn’t surprised either. But what did surprise me was America’s response. Why does the conversation here so quickly become political, fragmented, or avoidant? Why do we focus on individuals instead of systems? Why do we struggle to hold power accountable—especially when it’s wrapped in wealth, status, or influence? In this episode, we explore: Why Americans may respond differently than other countries The psychology of protecting powerful people How systems (families, institutions, even nations) often protect themselves first And why this isn’t just about Epstein—it’s about all of us Because the real question isn’t just who did what…It’s what do we do when we see it?  Episode now live Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links #epsteinfiles #powerandcontrol #traumainformed #psychologypodcast #healingjourney #betrayaltrauma #relationships #mentalhealthawareness #therapistsofinstagram #systemsthinking #culturalpsychology 

Sometimes relationships fall into a confusing pattern.  Things feel connected for a while. Conversations are easier. You feel hopeful.  And then emotions show up: hurt, stress, vulnerability, and suddenly the other person shuts down. Many partners assume this means the person doesn’t care. But often what’s happening is something different. In this episode, Jackie talks about a pattern she sees frequently in couples called emotional cycling — when someone can access connection for a time but struggles to sustain it when emotional intensity increases. The good news is that emotional capacity can be learned.  Real intimacy doesn’t happen when emotions are avoided.  It happens when two people learn how to face them together.  Listen wherever you get your podcasts. https://www.speakpipe.com/ThanksForSharing Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links #relationshiphealth #emotionalintelligence #couplestherapy #attachmenthealing #mentalhealthpodcast #emotionalgrowth #relationships #healingrelationships

Recovery isn’t dramatic most of the time. It isn’t big breakthroughs. It isn’t intense motivation. It isn’t one powerful decision that fixes everything. It’s steady. It’s going to bed when you’d rather “steal time.” It’s feeling shame without escaping it.  It’s waking up at 3 a.m. and choosing not to spiral. It’s resisting the urge to future-trip and instead staying in this hour. It’s calling your spouse when you want to isolate. It’s saying, “I need to go through this,” instead of numbing it. Steady isn’t exciting. But steady builds resilience. And over time, what once felt haunting begins to quiet, not because life is perfect, but because you’re no longer running from yourself. Episode 357 is live. If you’re in the middle of the long game… this one is for you.    Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

What actually happens after sobriety begins? Many couples believe that once porn or addictive behaviors stop, the relationship should feel better right away. But for many people, that’s when a deeper layer of healing starts — emotional awareness, reconnecting with the authentic self, and learning how to rebuild safety, security, and trust. In this episode, I talk about what rebuilding really looks like — both individually and relationally.  Sobriety removes secrecy — but reconnection grows through emotional presence, consistency, and learning how to show up differently with each other over time. If you’re in the stage where recovery has begun but the relationship still feels fragile, this conversation is for you.  Have a question or something you’d like me to talk about in a future episode? You can call the show and leave a voicemail or send me an email — I love hearing from you, and your feedback helps shape these conversations.  https://thanksforsharingpodcast.my.canva.site/thanks-for-sharing-links

What happens to the self when parts of life begin living in secrecy? In this episode of the Thanks for Sharing podcast, we move beyond behavior and beyond relationship impact to explore how porn can shape identity, emotional development, and connection. We talk about: • how compartmentalization forms in the brain and nervous system • why dopamine can reinforce a “secret self” • what young men need to understand about relational risk and resilience • how partners often sense misalignment long before discovery • the difference between shame and responsibility • and how healing begins through development of the authentic self This episode is part of an ongoing series: Episode 1 — Regulation & the brain Episode 2 — Relational impact & betrayal Episode 3 — Development of the self (this episode)  Have a question or thought? I’ve added a place in my Linktree where you can send a message or leave a voicemail for a future episode. (you can stay anonymous)  Listen now — link in bio. #ThanksForSharingPodcast #AuthenticSelf #AttachmentHealing #PornRecovery #BetrayalTrauma #TherapyPodcast #MentalHealthEducation #HealingJourney  

  In this episode, we explore how porn reshapes relationships, not just behavior. We talk about how porn: quietly reorganizes relationships around absence impacts the partner’s nervous system and sense of safety often feels like cheating, even when there’s no physical affair contributes to loneliness, emotional withdrawal, and loss of self in partners shapes expectations of intimacy and attitudes toward women creates predictability that looks like safety—but isn’t We also explore why time alone doesn’t build security in relationships and why repair, not perfection, actually creates safety. This conversation isn’t about blame or shame.  It’s about understanding why things feel the way they do and what helps people rebuild capacity for intimacy, presence, and connection. Whether you’re navigating porn use, supporting a partner, or trying to make sense of distance in your relationship, this episode offers language for experiences that are often difficult to name.   

In this episode, we explore why porn is so compelling, why willpower usually fails, and why intelligent, caring people struggle with it even when it conflicts with their values or relationships. This conversation moves beyond shame and into understanding how novelty, dopamine, attachment, and emotional regulation intersect, and why real change starts with compassion, not control.  

We recorded this episode planning to talk about current events, and the conversation didn't go exactly where we planned, and that's why it matters.  Instead, we found ourselves talking about how people are actually living inside all of this, the personal experiences and stories that impact us.   Politics. Gender. Fear. Fatigue. Misunderstanding.    This wasn’t a debate.  It was a conversation about what it costs us to stay polarized — and what it might take to repair.    What part of this conversation stayed with you the most?  Where do you feel the divide showing up in your own life — relationships, family, friendships?

It sounds reasonable. It sounds like: • “This makes sense.” • “This is normal.” • “I already know why I do this.” In this episode, I explore how rationalization and minimization quietly protect comfort, certainty, and the need to feel right — especially for smart, thoughtful people.

Defensiveness doesn’t always look like anger. Sometimes it looks like minimizing, mocking, dismissing, or explaining things away. In this episode, I talk about: • why people get defensive • how avoidance can be loud or quiet • how to respond without escalating • and the red flags that mean a boundary has been crossed If you’ve ever felt shut down for asking a real question, this one’s for you.

Rachel and I talk about why so many of us feel pressure to know what comes next, and how real change tends to happen without announcements. We explore how moves, family dynamics, and internal shifts quietly reorient us long before we name them. If you’re entering this year without goals or certainty, this conversation offers permission to slow down.  Listen now.  

As this year comes to a close, there’s pressure to reflect, resolve, and reset.  But not everything we live through gets neatly wrapped up.  In this episode, I talk about what it means to move forward without closure, why waiting for it can keep us stuck, and how grief, loss, and complicated family dynamics shape what we carry and what we lay down. This isn’t an episode about resolutions. It’s about honesty.  About integration.  About letting a year end without forcing meaning too soon.

When one partner grows faster, it doesn’t mean the relationship is failing.   Uneven healing is one of the most painful dynamics couples face. One partner finds language, boundaries, and insight. The other is still trying to feel safe. This episode isn’t about who’s “ahead.” It’s about how healing actually unfolds, and how couples stay connected when growth isn’t synchronized. Because growth isn’t a competition, and pressure isn’t intimacy. If this feels familiar, this episode is for you. Listen, reflect, and notice what lands.  

In this episode, we go into the identity shifts that happen in relational recovery, for betrayed partners, for CPTSD survivors, and for the partners who are healing from addiction or avoidance.   When recovery is real, identity shifts happen beneath the surface. And they can feel terrifying, confusing, and unfamiliar, even when they’re healthy     If you’ve ever felt your body tense even when your partner is doing everything right… This episode explains why.     If you’ve ever felt scared by something that was actually good… this is for you.  Save & share.  Full episode in bio.  

   Have you ever made a decision or taken a step in your healing that terrified you, only to realize later it was the best thing you've ever done? Today we’re talking about why healing so often feels uncomfortable, why your brain resists the exact things that help you grow, and how to tell the difference between the discomfort that sets you free and the discomfort that keeps you stuck.       In this episode, Jackie unpacks The Discomfort Paradox—the surprising truth that the hardest, scariest parts of healing are often the ones that finally move us forward.    If this episode stirred something in you—an old story, a new awareness, or a pattern you’re finally ready to shift—take a moment to ask yourself:   Is this discomfort healing or harmful? That single question can change your trajectory. If this episode resonated with you, share the episode with someone who might need it today.

Family roles aren't personality traits.  They are survival strategies.  In this episode, Jackie talks about how these roles form within the Child Self, the Adaptive Child Self, and the Functional Adult Self framework. And how healthy families do it differently.   If you grew up in a role you’re trying to outgrow, if you lose your Adult Self around family, and if you’re trying to break generational patterns, this episode is for you.  This episode will help you understand why you became who you had to be,  and how to become who you want to be now.  

In this week’s episode, I explore how identity is built: the parts we inherit, the roles we perform to survive, the stories we are never allowed to tell, and the parts of us that only come alive when we finally feel safe.     If you’ve ever wondered why you feel the way you do… or why it’s so hard to change old patterns…this episode will help you understand your story with more compassion and clarity.  Tune in wherever you listen to podcasts.  Reflect on the stories that shaped you.  And ask yourself with curiosity — not shame — “Who am I becoming?”  

Emotional pain isn’t random. It’s inherited, absorbed, reenacted, and carried on.  n this episode, we trace heartbreak, betrayal, childhood trauma, and addiction back to their emotional roots… and explore what it actually takes to heal the younger self still holding the pain.   Emotional pain is never “just emotional.” Your brain responds to heartbreak, betrayal, childhood wounds, and even addiction with the same neural alarm system it uses for physical injury.   This episode is an invitation to understand your pain instead of judging it — and to reclaim the younger parts of you that still need your voice, protection, and compassion. 

Not as a headline or scandal, but as a blueprint of how power preys on vulnerability… and how society lets it happen. This episode is not about conspiracy theories or sensational stories. It’s about trauma. It’s about power. Epstein wasn’t a scandal. He was a warning. This episode explores why society protects powerful men, why victims don’t “run,” and why girls were the currency of elite dominance — not partners. This isn’t about sex. It’s about power, trauma, and cultural blindness. 

Accountability is one of the strongest predictors of emotional safety. In this episode, I reveal 8 evidence-based green flags that show someone is capable of healthy love — not just interested in it. These are the relational patterns that build safety → security → trust → love → shared meaning. You’ll also learn why saying “I love you” every night isn’t a sign of security—but respecting your pace and boundaries is. 🎧 Listen now and recalibrate your relationship radar. Whether you’re dating, healing, or 20 years into marriage, this episode will give you the roadmap to building love that’s safe, stable, and transformative.

 We love to say “We have good sex.” But what if what we’re calling good is actually trauma, anxiety, emotional distance, or porn conditioning disguised as intimacy? In this episode, I’m asking the uncomfortable question most couples avoid: “Is it really good sex—or just intense sex?”    Great orgasms don’t equal great intimacy. The real question isn’t “how often are you having sex?” but “do you feel safe, seen, and connected afterward?”   If sex is the only time you feel close in your relationship—this episode is for you.      Hit play now and reclaim your sexual truth.  Follow, review, or message me your takeaways—this conversation is just getting started.  

We’re more “connected” than ever—yet lonelier than we’ve ever been.  Loneliness has become an epidemic. We’ve traded real community for scrolling, and honest connection for performative belonging. And it’s hitting young men the hardest.  In this week’s episode, Jackie unpacks the roots of loneliness, what it’s doing to our bodies and minds, and why vulnerability—not toughness—is the way out.  Listen now on your favorite podcast app and start your own conversation about connection.  Share this episode with someone who might need the reminder: you don’t have to do life alone.

In this episode of Thanks for Sharing, I explore what trauma bonding really is, how it forms, and why it’s so difficult to break free. We’ll discuss the psychology behind it, the subtle ways it can manifest (not just in extreme cases), and what healing can entail. If you’ve ever wondered why you—or someone you care about—feel stuck in a painful relationship cycle, this episode will give you clarity, compassion, and a path forward.   Listen now on your favorite podcast app. Link in bio 

 Why are so many young men feeling more alone than ever—despite living in the most connected age in history? In this episode, we tackle the loneliness epidemic head-on and explore what fathers, sons, and communities can do to build real connection and courage."  In this episode, Jackie sits down with Carver Brown to talk about the unique challenges young men face in today’s world. Together, they unpack the distinction between healthy solitude and painful isolation, and why community is crucial.       Don’t miss this episode—it’s a conversation that matters for all of us. Listen now, and then share it with someone who needs a reminder that they’re not alone. And if this message resonates with you, hit subscribe so you never miss future episodes that dive deep into recovery, connection, and living with purpose.   https://youtu.be/c8BOdf5drsA?si=iDaV-C8tnFHo1Xfj

What happens when anger and sexuality collide? In this episode, Jackie unpacks eroticized rage—a painful fusion of anger and arousal rooted in childhood trauma. She explores how disrupted attachment and unhealed wounds manifest in adult relationships, and why understanding the distinction between anger and rage is crucial for healing.   Listen now to learn how to break the cycle and move toward safer, healthier intimacy.  

 In this episode, we dive into how to approach tough talks with compassion, clarity, and courage, so you can protect safety and grow trust in your most important relationships. 

 What do a psychologist, a smartphone, and a fractured family all have in common? They’re at the center of the struggles today’s teens are facing—and Netflix’s Adolescents pulls no punches in showing us why.  In Part Two of our conversation on Adolescents, Jackie Pack and Rachel Allen dig deeper into the psychological and societal layers of the series. From the delicate role of psychologists in building trust, to how technology fuels youth behavior, to the ripple effects of crime inside families—we break it all down. We also explore how parents and teens can open up conversations about masculinity, identity, and the modern pressures shaping adolescence.  Don’t just watch the series—understand it. Tune into Part Two now and join us as we unpack what’s really happening beneath the surface of growing up today.  

 What happens when a raw coming-of-age story collides with the hard truths of bullying, violence, and fractured families? Netflix’s Adolescents isn’t just a show—it’s a mirror to the struggles our youth face today.  In this episode, we dive into the first three episodes of the Netflix series Adolescents. From its striking filming style to the layered psychology of its characters, we unpack how the show shines a light on youth violence, the weight of parental roles, and the hidden realities of adolescence. This isn’t just entertainment—it’s a conversation starter about the challenges shaping the next generation.  Tune in now and join the conversation—because understanding the world of our teens means rethinking the world we’re building for them. Listen to the full episode wherever you get your podcasts.

 This episode explores how childhood dynamics can lead to self-abandonment and self-betrayal—and how to start healing and reclaiming authenticity. https://healingpathsrecovery.com/couples-workshop-beyond-words/

In this powerful conversation, therapist Adam Nisenson, LMFT, CSAT, opens up about the often-ignored reality of men navigating betrayal. He shares both his personal journey and professional insights into:  The unique challenges men face when society tells them to “be strong” instead of vulnerable  The stages of healing after betrayal  How support systems and safe connections help men reclaim their self-worth  Why embracing vulnerability isn’t weakness—it’s transformative power This episode is a must-listen for anyone who wants to better understand men’s healing journeys and the courage it takes to face betrayal with honesty and heart.  Tune in now and explore the path from pain to resilience.