the STAB! show

In this monumentally safe episode of the STAB! show, big gritty host Jesse Jones welcomes a treacherous panel of Jaclyn Weiand, Kameron Schmid, & Tyler Kinney to share their three DUMBs, new greeting cards for “Congratulations on surviving a near death experience”, “Happy ‘You Touched A Butt Day!’”, & “Wishing you Ill in this Difficult Time”, closing arguments in defense of a matchmaker with really poor character judgments, only doing the right thing when you know someone is watching, & getting dragged into doing something you really don’t want to do for someone that you don’t really even like that much, dating profiles for someone who masturbates in a tanning bed, a bag of mulch, & someone who leaves painted rocks in parks, and rundowns of podcasts including a show hosted by two guys who are both secretly really into each other, but are afraid to act on it, and their mutual best friend, a podcast titled “Mind Your P’s & Q’s” hosted by Barry, Larry and Gary, & a podcast hosted by a freshly raked pile of leaves and a good book sitting on a neatly folded quilt.

In this gloriously gooey episode of the STAB! show, stringy, dippable host Kameron Schmid, welcomes a gorgeous, golden panel of Eric Barger, Sam Hochhalter, & Jesse Jones to share their three takes on WFH, pick-up lines to and from a cartoon alien, a rodeo clown, & a sassy housekeeper, celebrations of the invention of Coca-Cola, Hank Williams’ second divorce from Audrey Sheppard, Fritz Von Opal’s rocket car, Joe & Phil Nekro, Bing Crosby’s White Christmas, & Paul McManus’ barefoot skiing, angry poems about cheese sticks, fleas and ticks, & greasy wicks, and synopsis of made-up movies, “Sensual Castle”, “My Mom Married Paul Bunyan”, and “Centaur Siege!”

In this devastating, fierce episode of the STAB! show, easy target and host Jesse Jones welcomes a shredding panel of Dylan Fox, Willie Travis, & Marco Cabodi to share their three CWDs, nine Summer Vacation haiku, campaign speeches from a certificate from the International Star Registry running for Mayor of a divorced Dad's game room, a half a roll of single ply toilet paper running for a position on the board of a senior prank, & Unsweetened Tea running for reelection to the soda fountain selection in the sit down dining area of a Pizza Hut, descriptions of new drugs, Washboard Gabs, Li'l Gulps, & Sublingual Marmots, and rundown of new Fall TV shows, “The Bone Cannibal”, “Life Party”, & “Cat Challengers”.

In this flatulent episode of the STAB! show, cheek clappin’ host Jesse Jones welcomes a fragrant, noisy, hilarious panel of Jeff Brown, Dayna Bryant, & Emma Haney share their three takes on EFNH, bootlegs of The Middle, Mike & Molly, & CSI:Cyber, recipes for an inside joke, a super chill pool party, & someone with absolutely zero self awareness, dating profiles for the disembodied spirit of an oldtimey prospective trapped in a twelve pack of Bud Light Chelada Clamato, a hemp cross body bag full of trail mix, & someone really into kite surfing, and tourism guides for Shit Speckle Flats, Circling-back-ington, & Awkward-Teen-topia.

In this humiliating episode of the STAB! show, bully with specific needs and host Jesse Jones welcomes a sloshing, snarfing panel of Jack Marie, Micaela Pettigrew, & Tyler Kinney to share their three BCMs, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters COIBRPS, AFOSATA, & UFQTTNE, descriptions of new cereals themed around being sick at home on a school day as a kid, a work function outside the office, & a cereal called “Cinnamon Swirly Health-Ums”, descriptions of new drugs, including Li'l Screamums, Nutri-Caulk, & Jelly Deans, and descriptions of fights between a barrel of Old Sac salt water taffy just two days away from retirement vs. a spinny rack of novelty California license plates with nothing left to lose, an army of Thrift Store employees armed with security tag remover guns and stacks of jigsaw puzzles missing any number of pieces vs. A platoon of Coffee Shop baristas armed with milk steamers and a case full of unsold end of shift pastries, & everyone waiting in the drive thru line of a Chick-Fil-A on a Friday afternoon lunch rush vs. Everyone waiting outside a DMV office before it opens on a Monday morning.

In this aggressively noodled episode of the STAB! show, hearty host Jesse Jones welcomes a creamy, brothy panel of Joe-Joe Louis, Nick Coleman, & Christy Farley to share their three takes on TBO, nine items on the bathroom walls of Optimism, craigslist postings for a just okay moral compass, a reasonably priced, a reasonably priced, gently used, time travel sphere, & services as an on call scapegoat for hire, the toy-ifications of the Grind, imposter syndrome, & a mental health day, and descriptions of new businesses including selling new cryptid design inspirations to mad scientists, bio engineers, amoral billionaires, really anyone who can afford it, a small, comfortable room, completely cut off from the reality outside of it, & a chain of raw food co-ops backed by major grocery store chains.

In this hearty British treat of an episode of the STAB! show, big clock and host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel innit, of Daniel Kessenich, Christiana, & Marco Cabodi to share their three E&Cs, nine items on the breakroom bulletin board of Jerk Ass Dipshit Fuck Wads, closing arguments in defense of slum lords, current fast food prices, & someone who can’t stand people who “Can’t take a joke”, reviews of things including a review of a hella sick weekend festival experience you got on Temu, a Yelp review of the English Language, & an Amazon review of The Force, and tourism guides for Giggle-fits-lahoma, Delapida-topia, & Trapper-Keeper-ton.

In this disturbingly damp episode of the STAB! show, bindle boy and host Jesse Jones welcomes a gruff, moist panel of Cory Barringer, Rebecca Beskeen, & Kameron Schmid to share their three takes on WADR, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters OUAFCDU, PCIPBIL, & EWLARXA, breakfast cereals themed around Summer vacations growing up, the Industrial Revolution, & a cereal called “Sugar Spattered Wedges”, explanations of things including colorectal health to the Easter Island statues, that feeling you get when you do something nice to a politician, & insider trading to an intestinal tapeworm, and erotic letters to the editors of Gun Dog Magazine, American Patchwork & Quilting, & Arizona Highways.

In this first thought theater episode of the STAB! show, top of mind host Jesse Jones welcomes an impulsive panel of Connor Martin, Mikhail Chernyavky, & Brett Stults to share their three TNCCs, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters EDUOBML, KUDOLIA, & ARPMUCE, campaign speeches from a magic eight ball running for the position of Chief Financial Officer of a struggling college student, a spooky, Halloween sound effect CD vying for a spot in the 10 sleeve CD wallet in someone's 1996 Toyota Tercel, & a strip of non-winning raffle tickets and a napkin from the first date with your most recent ex, vying to remain in a tub in your storage unit, dating profiles for he grease trap of an overworked food truck, the drink specials menu at Chili's, & a mischievous diaper bag, and rundowns of podcasts, including a podcast from a world where aliens landed on earth just a week ago, a podcast hosted by a backyard full of yappy dogs, & a podcast titled “Mop Up Time with Beans and the Wenis”.

In our fourth trip to Crocker ArtMix, drippy yuck host Jesse Jones welcomes a bucket full of panel glop including Frankie Lord, Lacey Carroll, & Nick Pettigrew to share their three CAMs, descriptions of new drugs including, Little Blue Boys, O’Keeffe Kush, & Dali Drops, and synopsis of Made-Up Movies, “Star University”, “Nancy Zap and the Megaghosts”, & “Meal”.

In this still pretty good episode of the STAB! show, ferret with a limp and host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of slightly used birds, Carissa Edwards, Mickey McKim, & Tyler Kinney to share their three takes on RBCA, pick-up lines to and from a backyard full of snails, a self-conscious tiger, & an amateur sky writer, craigslist postings for a light, easy, breathable couture hazmat suit for the survivalist that also wants to make a statement in the roiling apocalyptic hellscape, a guaranteed, priority seat in the upcoming session of “Iddle Widdle Schnuckum Tawk” your cutesy early relationship baby talk, speech training workshop, & all of the stuff that was left over after you conked a level two goblin fighter on the head in the woods that one time, wedding vows to driverless cars, unseasonable weather, & someone who “does their own research”, and the synopsis of made-up movies, “Destiny of the Cybernetic Men”, “The Insanity of Toronto”, & “Filth Alley, The Final Chapter”.

In this hummus covered episode of the STAB! show, extra mild host Jesse Jones welcomes a chaotic, dangerous spread of a panel of Kameron Schmid, Gaby Gilmore, & Molly Doan to share their three CERRAs, nine Spring haiku, recipes for defending yourself against a gaslighter, someone who really commits themselves to a retro trend, & hosting a get together with friends that you won't actually hate, descriptions of new drugs, Giftcardimum, Adorbs Drops, & the Devil's Lasagna, and tourism guides for Chopped-liverton, The HOA Hills, & Worst-case-scenario-sburgh.

In this leisurely buoyant episode of the STAB! show, rigid hot Jesse Jones welcomes a floaty panel of Sean Crandall, Kyle Buis, & Kim Martel to share their three takes on SCOBY, nine bulletin board items from the break room of Morning People, craigslist postings for a meme collection of varying dankness, a post asking people if you could “just get a bite of that”, & a fleet of zeppelin, the toy-ifications of a music festival, kinks, & being a people pleaser, and descriptions of podcasts including a podcast from the world of Norwegian Folktales, a podcast titled "The Wet Noodlers Start Making Cents", & a podcast hosted by participants inside a podcast themed escape room.

In this precise and brutal episode of the STAB! show, swan and host Jesse Jones welcomes a intricately graphed panel of Ben Rice, Jenna Shartz, & Nick Pettigrew to share their three WITHIHs, pick-up lines to and from a stressed out sloth, a saucy little pencil case with a secret, & Red 40, campaign speeches for a stack of seventies, porn magazines running for mayor of the most kick ass yard sale this fucking culdasac has ever seen, a bottle of baby aspirin and half a box of round bandaids, running for health secretary of the office kitchenette, & you are “Slorny” a newly recognized combination sleepy/horny running for a position in a college student's range of emotions, reviews of things, including a Yelp of a business that you did a Location , Location, Location for in the past, an Amazon review of you left by an ex, & a TripAdvisor review of a cyberpunk world in a hard sci-fi novel, and who would win in fights between a locksmith with a magical key ring and only thirty six hours to save his family vs. A Dickensian Orphanage Master with a gruel ladle that gives them full control of fog and relative humidity, an HOA president with a lawn ruler powered by petty spite and the eternal, burning flame of losing out on their sixth grade perfect attendant certificate because of that one day they had to go to their grandmother's stupid funeral Vs. An MLM Platinum Seller, armed with catalogs forged in the influential Springs of Swaggeroth, and imbued  with the dark FOMO magics, & a squad of highly trained anti-drug mascots powered by near limitless reserves of optimism and go get ‘em attitudes Vs. an assembly room full of bored 16-year-olds, glued to their phones, all armed with various vape implements.

In this ethically dosed episode of the STAB! show, brightly colored host Jesse Jones welcomes a freaked out panel of Eric Barger, Dani Walsh, & Jaclyn Weiand to share their three takes on OA, new STAB!tionary entries including IOARSRC, MYAULIH & OWTPUMH, new breakfast cereals including a cereal called “Hella O’s”, and others themed around toxic positivity, & art school, descriptions of new drugs, Excitable Puppies, Glitter Regret, & Puce Todds, and rundowns of new Fall TV shows, “The Next Outstanding Actor”, “Embarrassing Voyage”, & “Squirrel Finder”.

In this very wrong episode of the STAB! show, expectant host Jesse Jones welcomes a glowing, radiant panel of Dayna Bryant, Rebecca Beskeen, & Tyler Kinney to share their three BISTs, nine items from the bathroom walls of the Olympic Village in Milano Cortina, Lip Filler, campaign speeches from a small convenience store in Hollywood where various C-list celebrities can sometimes be seen buying cigarettes and energy drinks and sundries, lobbying for a position on a Celebrity Star Tours bus route, the flag emojis vying for spots in the sexting rotation, & a balloon that used to be filled with heroin running in a special election to replace the suddenly outgoing Sheriff of a child’s birthday party, angry poems about manic, fanfic, & tantric, and descriptions of podcasts including a podcast hosted by a Planet Fitness keychain membership card, a HelloFresh subscription confirmation email and an expensive juicer with really good Amazon reviews, a podcast titled “The Onion Boys Think Things”, & a podcast from the world of AI slop.

In this pew pew episode of the STAB! show, cool guy Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of long hand folk in Emma Haney, Cierra Ramirez, & Marco Cabodi to share their three takes on DIO, new Greeting Cards for “Happy Better You Than Me, Day”, "Congratulations on Watching 16 Straight Days of Curling”, & “Wishing You Well on This, Your Current Rock Bottom”, craigslist postings for discount taxidermy service, emotional baggage, & a rocking chair, made of rocks, designed for listening to rock, explanations of things including explaining passive aggression to an active volcano, totalitarianism to a school of mackerel, & participation trophies to a ninth century Viking raider, and erotic letters to the editors of Editor & Publisher, 1859 - Oregon’s Magazine, & Vintage Spirit.

In this genre twisting episode of the STAB! show, scary boy host Jesse Jones welcomes a den of bears in Willie Travis, Jorge Hernandez, & Jack Marie to share their three HELLs, pick-up lines to and from a rusty meat hook, an old leather glove with knives on it, & blood, recipes for things, including a creepy doll or stuffed animal that MIGHT be telling people to do murder, but might also just be weird and old and creepy, a flawless exorcism, & a horny summer camp where absolutely nothing terrible could possibly go wrong, wedding vows to the Mayor of a town overrun by bus riding, blood thirsty bears, who refuses to shut down the bus lines, a demon possessed car tire, & a clown; just a regular ass clown, and tourism guides for Dreams-ville, The Ch-ch-ch Ha-ha-ha Estates, & The Right Slaughterton Manor Upon Grueseometon.

In this leafy episode of the STAB! show, healthful adventurer and host Jesse Jones welcomes a cruciferous panel of Micaela Pettigrew, Michelle Petro, & Lacey Carroll to share their three takes on DML, nine 2026 Winter Olympic haiku, closing arguments in defense of drunken late night online impulse purchases, rain on your wedding day, and a free ride, when you’ve already paid, & that guy with the acoustic guitar at the party, the toyification of making plans as an adult, your first job, & getting health conscious, and descriptions of podcasts including a podcast hosted by Micaela’s high school self, a podcast titled “Nut Up, Buttercup!”, & a true crime style podcast hosted by all the attendees of a “Just Divorced” party solving the case of the failed relationship.

In this damp, dank episode of the STAB! show, moist host Jesse Jones welcomes a whiffy panel of Sethu Chidambaram, Jeff Brown, & Joe-Joe Louis, to share their three GHINs, nine items on the break room bulletin board of Self Determination, celebrations of Yerba Buena, Olympic curling, the Rubik’s Cube, Dick Cheney, bell chimes, & The Lone Ranger, descriptions of new drugs, including Steamed Box Springs, Plaid Kenneths, & Blotchy Herringbone, and descriptions of fights between a taco bowl filled with ingredients grown in a garden on Mount Olympus vs. a gumbo consisting of items bought from a farmer's market in Mordor, a men's rights activist powered by the rage of seeing gender swapped super heroes and prominent, high ranking women in sci-fi shows vs. a thousand cranky toddlers jacked up on birthday cake and armed with blow guns loaded with jellyfish toxin darts, & a giant crab with all of the knowledge of the Library of Alexandria, and a fleet of 2027 Tesla Awesome Boats vs. an AI datacenter brought to life by the power of a billion horny chat bot prompts, with psionic control of the Kraken.

In this achingly poor episode of the STAB! show, destitute host Jesse Jones welcomes a grumbly tummy panel of Adam Cranfill, Gaby Gilmore, & Joe Matthews to share their three takes on NCS, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters EFILOFT, POEEUTR, KYUBUKA, craigslist postings for six dozen bankers boxes full of punch cards that you think might be a 1960s AI program, or something, a collection of self published spy novels, & a magic bullet hot glued to an air fryer duct taped to an Instant Pot, dating profiles for someone who recently quit doing CrossFit, a pod of elephant seals, & a stack of pallets behind a grocery store, and synopsis of made-up movies Fascination Alley, Amazing Saturday, & The Sensuality of New Jersey.

In this resting scowl of an episode of the STAB! show, REAL annoyed host Jesse Jones welcomes a deep sigh of a panel of Dayna Bryant, Brett Stults, & Kim Martel to share their three HCFCs, pick-up lines to or from a manipulative groundhog, a pretty good waffle breakfast, & the couch in your grandparents’ family room that no one was ever allowed to go in, descriptions of breakfast cereals branded around quiet confidence, made for the inhabitants of a magical forest of anthropomorphic animals, & branded around being the only competent person at your work, reviews of things including a Yelp review of an elf cookie tree under new management, sobriety purchased on Temu, & the YouTube comments for Earth, and descriptions of new businesses including designing mud run obstacle courses for neat freaks and germaphobes, a chain of co-working makerspace hacker lab establishments that cater specifically to people who pick up new hobbies in the New Year and immediately drop them, & selling parchment and quills to Gen Alpha.

In this aggressively light hearted episode of the STAB! show, mirth bomber and host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of anarcho-jokesters Bernie Baktashian, & Daniel Kessenich to share their two takes on HRDC, six topical haiku about the first week and a half of 2026, campaign speeches for a sandwich bag full of googly eyes running for a position in an anarchist’s messenger bag, & a t-shirt quilt running for the position of throw blanket in a new couple’s living room, explanations of things including explaining phat beats to a chubby turnip, & snorkeling to a house cat, and descriptions of podcasts including a podcast hosted by the contents of a medicine cabinet, & a podcast titled “Wishful Stinkin’”.

In this tastefully attired episode of the STAB! show, fabric tube and host Jesse Jones welcomes an immodest panel of Kameron Schmid, Jeff Brown, & Jaclyn Weiand to share their three BRDFs, pick-up lines to and from a motivational poster, an independent coffee shop, & a vanity license plate, craigslist postings for a flat of mason jars filled with various wishes, services as a personal customized entourage, & a fine hand crafted wicker hamper full of gently used, locally sourced items that were absolutely not used to murder any ex husband whatsoever thank you very much, angry poems about resolutions, revolutions, & substitutions, and pitches for new businesses including, selling the concept of planned obsolescence to mountain ranges, selling slip ‘n slides to childless adults, & a shop that sells cute little hand crafted outfits and accessories for less traditional pets.

In this festivly traditional episode of the STAB! show, it’s our 2025 STAB! Family Year End Blowout ExSTAB!raganza! And this year, host and jolly gent Jesse Jones welcomes friends, performers and producers of STAB! things Alex Shewmaker, Bernie Baktashian, Cierra Ramirez, Connor Martin, Cory Barringer, Daniel Kessenich, Emma Haney, Emma Santora, Frankie Lord, Gigi McGill, Jack Marie, Jaclyn Weiand, Jeff Brown, Jenna Swartz, Jess Roberts, Jessilee Windhaus, Joe-Joe Louis, Kim Martel, Lacey Carroll, Michelle Petro, Tyler Kinney, Willie Travis to share their four takes on REM, pick-up lines to and from someone impatiently waiting for their drugs to kick in, a storage unit full of stolen bikes & a rusty bucket full of random meat, recipes for someone who high fives co-workers in their cubicles first thing in the morning, that person you can always count on, someone obsessed with shows like the Bachelor and Bachelorette, & a core memory, dating profiles for a cyborg sent from the dystopian future who’s already accomplished their mission and is now just living in the present, a basket of very aggressive puppies, an artist loft, & a fishing tackle box, descriptions of new drugs including Fontanyl, Spicy Dans, Hamburgler Drops, & Jean Jackets, and tourism guides for Scram-sburgh, Snooty-sylvania, & Dork-lahoma.

In this ever so slightly off episode of the STAB! show, twisted host Jesse Jones welcomes a chilly panel of Dylan Fox, Mikhail Cherynavsky, & Jeff Brown to share their three PRIMEs, pick-up lines to and from the guy at the Christmas party that makes sure to point out the mistletoe, one of Santa’s back-up reindeer, & a plate of sugar cookies, craigslist postings for spots in a DIY class for making emergency last minute gas station gifts more festive and seem more intentional, a ladle full of the simmer pot contents that have been constantly warming on a family stove top for generations, & a line of Labubu knockoffs made in Jeff’s garage, reviews of things including an Angie review of Grandma’s new boyfriend, a Game Informer review of Hanukkah, & a performance review of Santa, and pitches for small businesses including an aviary catering to very specific holiday gifts, a full time witch who during the holiday season works part time as a gingerbread house real estate agent, & renting out a barn as an Air B&B to anyone who gets turned away from any of the local Inns for any particular reason.

In this cold, lonely, overwhelming episode of the STAB! show, gruel covered host Jesse Jones welcomes a whooping cough riddled, parentless panel of Emma Haney, Kyle Buis & Marco Cabodi to share their three takes on CHIM, nine haiku about the Christmas season, celebrations of the Milestone Mo-Tel, Bob Barker, Saturday Night Fever, Bush v Gore, the HMS Duchess, & National Ding-A-Ling Day, descriptions of new drugs: Ugly Sweaters, Cranbarium, & Tinselux 9, and the results of fights between a single mother of five in 2012 who camped outside of a Target store for Black Friday deals Vs. a group of people getting increasingly more defiant about leaving if they’re not given some figgy pudding, right now, a sentient leg lamp, powered by the angst of an elf who only ever wanted to be a dentist vs. a crotchety, miserly old skinflint with a bucket full of a former magical snowman, and all of the birds from the 12 Days of Christmas led by a Grinch who’s heart grew FOUR sizes vs. all of the people from the 12 Days of Christmas led by a beagle on a flying dog house.

In this fruitfully multiplying episode of the STAB! show, sticky host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of low hanging Dougs, Jack Marie, Brett Stults & Christy Farley to share their three MLYs, new Greeting Cards for “our condolences on this, the anniversary of you absolutely losing your shit in public for something that you later realized was 100% your fault”, Happy “Apparently successful one night stand” morning, & Congratulations on putting back on that winter 20 pounds, closing arguments in defense of a UTI, Dude bros, & Seasonal Affective Disorder, angry poems about Jingles, Cringles, & Office Christmas Party Mingles, and rundowns of new Fall TV shows, Red Riding Hood and Santa Clause go to Jupiter, Hawk Teens, & My Mom Married Prince Charming.

In this unfortunately accurate episode of the STAB! show, air clump and host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of yuck drizzle in Dayna Bryant, David Shapiro & Frankie Lord to share their three takes on PTL, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters AZTNIPE, JEJWBEV, & VSDUKIM, descriptions of restaurants themed around Black Friday, train travel, and a restaurant named “Oops, All Sky Stuffs”, dating profiles for a Target parking lot, a 75 inch Roku smart TV, & a seasonal worker, and rundowns of podcasts including a podcast from the world of a Hallmark movie, a podcast hosted by Thanksgiving leftovers, & a podcast titled “Can We Assemble It”.

In this gluttonous holiday themed episode of the STAB! show, shameful host Jesse Jones welcomes a guilty panel of Jenna Swartz, Cierra Ramirez, & Daniel Kessenich to share their three takes on NFL, nine items on the bathroom walls of Black Friday, three recipes for each panelists’ family’s traditional Thanksgiving Day, the toyifications of a food coma, colonialism, & leftovers, and synopsis of made-up movies, “The Womanizing Werewolf's Wedding”, “The Resurrection of Cinderella", & “Sinful Odyssey to Uranus”.

In this epic struggle of an episode of the STAB! show, burly, hair host Jesse Jones welcomes a strong, majestic panel of Christiana, Micaela Pettigrew, & Nick Pettigrew to share their three SHSAAs, bootlegs of Planes, Trains & Automobiles, Alice’s Restaurant, & Dutch, craigslist postings for a bib collection from various sit down eateries, a line of designer fragrances made in your garage, & franchising opportunities for a timeshare exit company, dating profiles for a medium sized earthquake, one of those nice wooden salad bowls, & the stack of board games that’s made it through every move with you, and descriptions of new business, including designing custom workout plans for house plants, high end couture elementary school style Thanksgiving decorations, & a fine dining restaurant in a town populated entirely by picky eaters.

In this consistent, reliable episode of the STAB! show, six quarter host Jesse Jones welcomes an all beef panel of Grant Potter, Alex Shewmaker, & Chris Emery to share their three takes on PIMA, new greeting cards including a “Happy Surprise Holiday Season Layoff” card, “So You’ve Got $40 In Your Savings Account” card, & "Congratulations on Shitting Your Pants For The First Time as an Adult” card, celebrations of the Public Broadcasting Act of 1967, air freight, internet radio, Al Bundy, Marie Curie, & National Bittersweet Chocolate With Almonds, angry poems about whispers, crispers, & blisters, and rundowns of new Fall TV shows, “Ghost Listener”, “Mister Extreme and the Blast Boys”, & “Evil Hospital”.

In this comfortable, accepted episode of the STAB! show, warm counterbalance and host Jesse Jones welcomes an acceptable, sturdy panel of Connor Martin, Rebecca Beskeen, & Michelle Petro to share their three GHBs, nine (more or less) items on the break room bulletin board of pragmatism, recipes for things including who the stinky kid in elementary school grew up to be, someone who just always seems to make an awkward situation even more awkward, & someone that you barely know but that always comments on your social media posts, descriptions of new drugs: Beige Assassins, Prominent Quentins, & Manic Eliza Dushkus, and the synopsis of made-up movies “Blood Thirsty Mountain”, “Bravery & Bedroom Eyes”, & “The Creature From The Future”.

In this fragrant episode of the STAB! show, unpleasant surprise of a host Jesse Jones welcomes a leafy, whiffy panel of Marco Cabodi, Sam Hochhalter, & Frankie Lord to share their three takes on PSAT, pick-up lines to and from a nice hearty Fall soup, actionable intelligence, & craisins, descriptions of new cereals themed around Steampunk, a liquor store, & a feeling of accomplishment, reviews of things including a TripAdviser review of the first colony on Mars, a Yelp review of a fine dining restaurant run entirely by cartoon roaches, & an Amazon review of vestigial organs, and descriptions of new businesses including a Dippin’ Dots cart in the year 2105, a fish taco stand in Atlantis, & a job placement service for pampered socialites.

In this lung full of hospitality that IS this episode of the STAB! show, sweet tea stinkin’ host Jesse Jones welcomes a debutant panel of Sam Hochhalter, Heather Rogue, & Jack Marie to share their three PUUs, nine haiku about the state of the world, campaign speeches from a box of dental floss campaigning for a spot in the Halloween Candy bowl, a bottle of Tabasco sauce in the work fridge that was there before most everyone was hired running for President of the Office, & a graphing calculator lobbying for a position in the sex toy drawer, the dating profiles for the Northern Lights, an AI Chatbot, & a needlepoint hound on a pillowcase made from an upcycled tshirt, and recaps and rundowns of podcasts including a podcast for yard sale enthusiasts, a podcast hosted by spiders, & a podcast titled “You Guessed Wrong, Bitch!”.

In this super close, tight knit episode of the STAB! show, closer than a brother host Jesse Jones welcomes a strictly platonic panel of Cierra Ramirez, Tessa Brown, & Dayna Bryant to share their three takes on RIF, bootlegs of Jeepers Creepers, Zombieland, & Omen, closing arguments in defense of being bullied in middle school, choosing a really dumb hill to die on, & insomnia, angry poems about rainy days, regretful lays, & disparity in pays, and tourism guides for That-Bish-ville, The Quirky Islands, & Optimism Falls.

In this healthy, full formed episode of the STAB! show, regular host Jesse Jones welcomes a corny panel of Kameron Schmid, Cory Barringer, & Eric Barger to share their three HAGOs, new Greeting Cards for “Congratulations on that threesome”, “Incase you thought we forgot”, “Happy First time you told your kids, ‘Because I Said So’ Day”, celebrations of Stanislav Petrov, Linda Hamilton, one dollar & three dollar gold coins, the three cent piece, the Hollywood sign, the Great Plague of London, & Gilligan’s Island, reviews of things, including a Game Informer review of human intimacy, a Yelp review of the Afterlife, & an Amazon review of the digestive system, and everyone’s perfect endings to the show.

In this thick and yeasty episode of the STAB! show, nutty, full bodies host Jesse Jones welcomes a glass of an uncrustable panel in Joe-Joe Louis, Ben Warheit, & Jaclyn Weiand to share their three takes on BLOG, bootleg versions of The Croods, Kangaroo Jack, & The Love Guru, new theme restaurants including “Oops, All Bread!”, and themed around a miserable family reunion picnic, & a bridal shower, dating profiles for a mechanical pencil, a basket full of Jackfruit, & a 12 foot tall Home Depot skeleton, and recaps of podcasts from the world of the back of a sugary kids breakfast cereal box, a podcast titled “Just Rippin’ It”, & a podcast hosted by a charcuterie board.

In this hatful, Momly episode of the STAB! show, outsider barely holding it all together, and host, Jesse Jones welcomes a cacophonic up skirt panel of Jeff Brown, Emma Haney, & Kim Martel to share their three YMBJs, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters WILEJAT, EHACOUM, & LNGIACU, recipes for effectively enhancing a resume, for gettin’ down in da club, & someone really into drag racing, dating profiles for a tangled mess of charging cables, Cowboy Curtis from Pee-wee’s Playhouse, & a bag of marshmallows, and tourism guides for The United Principalities of Morose, Rage-Quit-sylvania, & Giggle Town.

In this exceptionally furry episode of the STAB! show, good boy and host Jesse Jones welcomes a purr-fect panel of Joe-Joe Louis, Jess Roberts, & Molly Doan to share their three takes on COL, pick-up lines to and from a straw man argument, banana Laughy Taffy, & the 90s Taco Bell interior design aesthetic, campaign speeches for oganesson seeking re-election to the board of noble gasses, a fork full of ravioli, dropped six seconds ago, campaigning for a spot back on the plate, & a wiggly rubbery monster pencil topper ticket redemption prize, running for mayor of an elementary school kid’s backpack, wedding vows to the Grim Reaper, Christmas decorations in stores in September, & a roommate’s stack of week old dirty dishes in the sink, and recaps of new Fall TV series, “Battle of Uranus”, “Tiger Addict”, & “Amy Impossible & The Micro Dogs”.

In this frothy, salty episode of the STAB! show, thieving crab and host Jesse Jones welcomes a briney panel of Lacey Carroll, Connor Martin, & Sam Hochhalter share their three MOOPs, new greeting cards for occasions including Happy Petty Revenge Day, Sorry you’ve just realized you’ve Finally become what you swore growing up that you’d never be, & Congratulations on the new Drug Habit, craigslists ads for a single level marketing scheme, just alright jeans, & a gateway to an alternate dimension that you’re not sure is any better, but at least it’s not here, angry poems about land lovers, night clubbers, & rubber baby buggy bumpers, and tourism guides for Cookersfield, Tassel Town, & Bark-Bark-Meowsburgh.

In this over the pants episode of the STAB! show, grinding and sweating host Jesse Jones welcomes a chafed panel of Grant Potter, Tessa Brown, & Tyler Kinney to share their three takes on CML, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters TYRDEAB, EPBTELM, & ATDJDIW, recipes for an enticing carnival game, someone who still believes in the goodness of others, & a middle school skating party, reviews of things including a Car & Driver review of vandalizing a Tesla, a Rolling Stone review of your own self speak, & a TripAdvisor review if doing hallucinogens in the woods, and descriptions of businesses including a brothel in Abstinence Falls, selling limbs to snakes and worms, & grief counseling services for sociopaths.

In this totally terrific tour through the STAB! show, hecka sick host Jesse Jones welcomes an eerily forgotten panel of Mikhail Chernyavsky, Brett Stults & Jenna Swartz to share their three HPCCs, nine items on the break room bulletin board of Suck Ups, celebrations of weather forecasts, Jerry Garcia, MTV, Dune, oxygen, & Jason Momoa, descriptions of new drugs, Thinkful Wishings, Micro Trevors, & Turquoise Aunts, and tourism guides for Ultra-Luxembourg, Meme-coin-opolis, & The Tarot Islands.

In this streaming exclusive episode of the STAB! show, LD Leading Man and host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of three season pre-orders, Frankie Lord, Marco Cabodi, & Jeff Brown to share their three takes on GCM, bootlegs of The Producers, Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, Gnomeo & Juliet, closing arguments in defense of Frankie’s first apartment, a zombie apocalypse, & really looking forward to a sammich all day, only to find the last few slices of bread you have are moldy, explanations of things including explaining shark week to a pod of Cape Fur seals, rational choice theory to a chainsaw sculpture of a grasshopper, & soup to a behind schedule freeway construction entering its third year of work, and rundowns of new Fall TV shows, “Dreadful Island”, “Lady Danger and the Cat Warriors”, & “The Terrifying Cybernetic Person”.

In this sandy, mysterious episode of the STAB! show, cocoa butter scented host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of hunky, brooding panelists, Daniel Kessenich, Sethu Chidambaram, & Dylan Fox to share their three PBS’, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters WEIACSH, TDUOPLS, & OJELUFO, descriptions of new cereals themed around street food vendors, a cereal called “Oops, All Invasive Thoughts”, and student loan debt, dating profiles for someone with a crisper drawer full of protein shakes, a six year old’s drawing of a horse, & someone who uses a beach towel as a regular home shower towel, and tourism guides for Tinderopolis, Snacklahoma, & Sigh Bluffs.

In this weird-o episode of the STAB! show, small, clucky host Jesse Jones welcomes a blue, furry, panel of Dayna Bryant, Bernie Baktashain, & Jack Marie to share their three takes on BF, pick-up lines to and from the polar ice caps, a tray of ribs, & baklava, recipes for things, including someone who just won’t take a hint, a pretty good trip to the river, & someone who says “irregardless”, wedding vows to unlovable things, including, the work copier, that smell, you just haven't been able to identify for months, & AI art, and synopsis of made-up movies, “The Orange Dinosaur”, “Lady Impossible”, & “Nancy Blast”.

In this familiar, fatty episode of the STAB! show, udderly capable host Jesse Jones welcomes a freshly churned panel of Emma Haney, Cierra Ramirez, & Joe-Joe Louis to share their three CCRIs, new Greeting Cards for “Happy Dissociation”, “Sorry You Had to Pull Out The Fat Clothes Again”, & “Get Fucked Soon”, craigslist postings for selling a Saturday morning fishing trip where you play the part of the purchaser’s Dad and tell them at least once during the outing that you’re proud of them, reselling your tickets to the “Electric Butter Party”, & offering seats on your cruise along the edge of the flat Earth, descriptions of new drugs, The Kraft, Wimp-Its, & Big Whoops, and descriptions of new businesses including a finishing school for sleep paralysis demons, a carbon neutral carnival, & a line of muscle tees for dorks.

In this strong, proud episode of the STAB! show, that one guy, host Jesse Jones, welcomes the best panel of Carissa Edwards, Lacey Carroll, & Christy Farley to share their three takes on DBS, new STAB!tionary entries from random letters VWAEKPE, MUSMFEU, & OMEYPTA, campaign speeches for a disused Library Card trying to keep your position in a transition from an old wallet to a new one, a graduation cap tassel hanging from the rear view mirror of a 2003 Toyota Corolla running for Mayor of the car’s interior, & a bar napkin covered in drunken scribblings running for Detective of What Happened Last Night, reviews of things including the YouTube comments for getting a promotion at work, a Trip Advisor review of “That one place” as left by your mom, & a Yelp review of your fridge and pantry, and rundowns of podcasts including a podcast from the world of Alice In Wonderland, a podcast hosted by a Hot Pocket, a Pop Tart and three ravioli, & a podcast titled “Yep, Yup, Yeppers!”.

In this bop of an episode of the STAB! show, catchy host Jesse Jones welcomes a panel of ear worms in Christiana, Emma Santora, & Eric Barger to share their three IFARs, pick-up lines to and from elitism, a dollop of sour cream, & a Peloton draped in dirty clothes, recipes for a pleasant Sunday afternoon, someone who always knows how to push your buttons, & a situation you're going to regret later, vows to waiting for the other shoe to drop, your own negative self talk, & someone who puts a “I bought this before I knew Elon was crazy” sticker on their Tesla, but knew full well what they were like but still put the sticker on there to try to convince people that they didn't, and synopsis of made-up movies, “The Mind Quester”, “The Emperor of Homes”, & “The Incredible Mystery of the Dreadful Scientist”.

In this flerpinshtauple episode of the STAB! show, derpingleem and host Jesse Jones welcomes a parginstorn panel of Nick Coleman, & Nick Pettigrew to share their two takes on BSOD, six Sacramento Summer haiku, closing arguments in defense of bad things happening to good people, & polyester, angry poems about Legumes, & Buffoons, and tourism guides for Loominyúr Upon Upper Low Blüncheschishishor, & The Independent Nation State of Fluff Cuddle Meadows.