Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD

It was so lovely to revisit my London Bridge psychosynthesis training roots and talk to the delightful Allan Frater for Episode 110 of Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham.He shares some of the ways in which he honours his imagination and integrates self-care, Self care and community care into his whole life.LINKSBuy Allan’s latest book here https://amzn.to/4d5XSmk (affiliate link)Website:https://wildimagination.uk/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Allan-Frater/100073610989149/The Psychosynthesis Trust:https://psychosynthesistrust.org.uk/Related episodesIf you enjoyed this, check out:Shake, Cry and Let Go with Emily Rosenkranz: Episode 104 of Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHDCommunity as Self Care (with Elizabeth Potts): Episode 83 of the Feel Better Every Day PodcastOwn Your Privilege, Change the World: Episode 80 of the Feel Better Every Day PodcastBook your free telephone consultation and access 100s of body-mind practices at https://solestosoul.ie/free-downloadsCHAPTERS(0:00) You are important, valuable and worthy(1:53) Introduction and welcome to episode 110(2:02) Meet Allan Frater and their shared training history(3:46) Allan’s new book and imagination in therapy(5:48) Waking Dreams and being imaginative(7:30) Feel: principles of self-care and embodiment(10:54) Attention and protecting focus in modern life(13:11) Love: connection through relationships(17:00) Heal: community, differences and polarisation(22:13) Responding to world events and collective context(25:18) Message to a younger self(28:48) Closing reflection and body scanHASHTAGS#allanfrater#imagination#psychosynthesis

Am feeling a bit morto – two mistakes with this episode:· Bealtaine is pronounced be-al-ten-ah (not be-al-tayne as I was saying) and· I GOT MY WEEKS MUDDLED UPThe Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD normally goes out Tuesday morning 7am Irish time but because I just realised (AuDHD brain), next week’s ep – this one – is OUT NOW so you can actually make USE of it in 2026!!!Self-compassion, giving myself grace, a thousand DOH!s etc…Still, I hope you enjoy it as we welcome the start of summer. As I write this, I have washing drying outside, have cycled into town and back and am feeling the seasonal shift which I’m looking forward to honouring more in the coming days – and with the Full Moon this Friday too.Let me know how you get on with these simple ideas for celebrating and see you in nearly two weeks now!le grá (with love),EveLINKSBook your free telephone consultation and access 100s of body-mind practices at https://solestosoul.ie/free-downloadsBhangra Joy with Aakriti Kaushik: Episode 108 of the Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD PodcastRelated episodesIf you enjoyed this, check out:Love your inner Smelly Cat this Bealtaine and beyond Episode 56 of The Feel Better Every Day PodcastMore Joy, Less Angst: Trauma-Informed Yoga for AuDHD Episode 93 of the Feel Better Every Day PodcastShake, Cry and Let Go with Emily Rosenkranz: Episode 104 of Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHDOwn Your Privilege, Change the World: Episode 80 of the Feel Better Every Day PodcastCHAPTERS0:00 Bealtaine and choosing love in challenging times1:05 Podcast intro and self-care for trauma and AuDHD2:39 Feel: Let it all out3:49 From pain to joy: Using joy as your GPS5:26 Why joy matters for stress and resilience6:41 Love: Connecting with your highest Self7:47 Heal: Community, co-regulation and connection8:57 Practising mudita and celebrating others10:09 Bealtaine tradition: Flowers, blessings and neighbours12:17 Choosing joy as an act of care and resistance13:08 Closing reflections: Feel. Love. Heal.HASHTAGS#bealtaine#mayday#muditaFULL TRANSCRIPTHappy Bealtaine, happy May Day. That’s going to be this Friday with the Full Moon, and I thought I’d do a special episode to celebrate the Celtic festival of love, lust and fertility.And I really want to focus on ways in which you can help yourself fall in love with yourself, fall in love with your life, fall more in love with your loved ones and fall in love with the world.We’re living through very challenging times, and if we tell ourselves that the world is going to hell in a handbasket, then it’s really depressing and it disempowers us and we forget about all the amazing people in the world, under insanely horrific conditions, who are still attempting to do the right thing and caring for others and creating good works and being forces for love and joy and peace.Read the full transcript at https://solestosoul.ie/blog

At time of writing, am aching in the best possible way from the first of Aakriti’s regular Bhangra dance classes at Grit Fitness and Dance – if you’re local enough to Westport, check them out. I’m planning to be there as many Wednesday evenings as possible because SO MUCH JOY!And, to my astonishment, while feeling like a monster during one of the moves last night, I did improve. I’d loved the taster workshop in February (before this interview was recorded) but had no confidence in my ability to actually manage the (simple!) steps but… I have some hope now (and even if I don’t, it’s a great workout and So Much FUN).Dance is so good for trauma and AuDHD. And the bilateral movement in some of the steps, while feeling tangled up in my brain, is, I know, contributing to healthy neuroplasticity as well as fitness. And did I mention the joy?The fact that I’m learning an Indian dance style in my new home country (over 7 years since I immigrated here now!), Ireland and being Indian Irish definitely contributes to the joy but Bhangra is a joyful Punjabi dance form from the north of India, associated with feasts and celebrations of harvest.The expansive, heart opening upper body movement as well as the gorgeously grounding lower body movements … am still beaming writing this.I hope you love listening to my interview with Aakriti as much as I loved talking to her. She is such a great teacher, modifying it for those of us who were struggling as well as a superstar there at the front who was managing the more advanced steps with seeming ease.So Much Fun.Do you dance?What style?What advice do you have for beginners?Let me know in the comments or by email.le grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS(0:00) How dance connects us to emotion and something deeper(0:25) Introducing Aakriti and the joy of Bhangra(1:50) Movement as pleasure rather than something we have to do(4:04) Meeting Aakriti and finding connection through community(5:12) From engineering to meditation and Bhangra(9:31) Why dance evokes emotion and joy(11:46) Self-care practices shaped through challenge(16:06) Letting go of perfection and adapting your routine(18:39) The one essential practice: meditation(23:16) Interconnection, purpose and supporting others(27:01) Starting small with meditation and building consistency(32:35) You are already worthy just as you are(34:10) Closing reflection and invitation to care for yourselfLINKSAakriti Kaushik: https://www.instagram.com/bhangra_westport/https://solestosoul.ie/book

Episode 107 is a really unusual episode of the Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD because my guests for this one are Peadar and Danny, a couple of very young entrepreneurs from Atlantic Valets. Not technically self-care professionals and yet, when I met them recently, something they said made me realise they’d be delightful guests and they were.I love their energy, enthusiasm and desire to help their customers. If you’re in or near Achill, check out Atlantic Valets and wherever you’re based, I hope this episode reminds you that you deserve clean, organised and welcoming environments. It can especially challenging to create and maintain them with ADHD but supports do exists.What helps you keep your car clean (enough)?le grá (with love),EveLINKSAtlantic ValetsFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/61587721393866Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/atlanticvaletsanddetailingJayne Leonard on cooking as self care: Episode 28 of The Feel Better Every Day PodcastThe book https://solestosoul.ie/bookBook your free telephone consultation and access 100s of body-mind practices https://solestosoul.ie/free-downloadsCHAPTERS(0:00) The gap between wanting to care for ourselves and finding it hard(0:30) Atlantic Valets’ Danny and Peadar and their approach to car valeting(4:21) Making car cleaning feel more doable for ADHDers, one step at a time(6:26) Finding a simple system to support focus and reduce overwhelm(8:13) The power of small details and taking pride in what we do(9:57) Everyday self-care and coming back to the present moment(15:41) Connecting with love through dogs, family and close relationships(17:34) Feeling held by community and giving back(20:08) Gentle advice to a younger version of ourselves(21:28) A moment to reflect and offer yourself careFULL TRANSCRIPTMany people listening, they will have AuDHD or ADHD and there’s the gulf between basic self-care in terms of what we would like to be doing for ourselves and what is more of a challenge. So I will ask you a little bit about that, like how might listeners make it easier for themselves to clean their own cars?Welcome to episode 107 of the Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD podcast. I thought they were so adorable when I met them at a local networking event.I wanted them to come on and help all my ADHDers to clean your car, know that you deserve a delicious car to drive around in.They are Danny and Peadar from Atlantic Valets and they are so new to business and they’re doing so much amazing work so quickly. I’ve been going for like over nearly 22 years now and they are so on message and just so joyful and delightful.I hope that they’ll inspire you to keep your environments clean, to outsource it where that’s an act of self-care for yourself. They’re based in Achill but wherever you are you might have similar and I really hope you enjoy this very unusual episode.Read the full transcript and access free downloads and more at https://solestosoul.ie/2026/04/21/cleaning-your-care-with-adhd-episode-107-of-the-soles-to-soul-care-for-trauma-and-audhd-with-eve-menezes-cunningham-podcast/

Have you ever wondered how we’ll ever have peace, freedom, justice, SAFETY and equality when half the population has been systematically erased from what most people in this society consider divine?Since hearing from much younger women that the Divine Feminine – such a healing force in my own trauma recovery and life these last 30+ years – has been co-opted to be used against women as “Divine femininity”, this episode shares some self-care, Self care and collective care ideas for people of ALL genders to experiment with.There are SO many Goddess archetypes, from around the world, that have helped me with my trauma recovery and for the graphics for this episode, I chose (to honour my Indian Irish roots):· Kali who reminds me of Divine Detox. Letting go. Diving deeper into life’s crashing waves instead of arguing with reality. Her tongue sticks out to represent her catching drops of blood and absorbing evil in order to transform and heal.· A photo I took at Uisneach of Eiru (for whom Eire, Ireland, was named).· The Greek Goddess archetypes were the first I came across and I adored Persephone’s transformation from traumatised into Queen of the Night and a guide for others. As I’ve learned more over the decades, her mother, Demeter, who fought for her freedom, represents our need to heal in connection. To coregulate.· and a Cosmic Egg with some hopeful looking sperm.With all that’s going on in the world, it’s always worth remembering that none of us choose or do anything to deserve who we happen to be born to, wear, what gender, etc etc etc.We’re all connected. And by connecting to the Divinity (as well as humanity!) in ourselves and others, we can hopefully find more compassion and give ourselves and others more grace.Le grá (with love),EveIf you’re a trauma survivor and AuDHDer like me, or you simply find self-care more of a “should” than a joy, this podcast is for you.I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham, a trauma therapist, AuDHD and self-care coach, senior accredited supervisor, columnist and author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-Care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing.Each Tuesday I share a mix of solo episodes and conversations with other self-care professionals. From other therapists, coaches, yoga teachers and authors to neuroscientists and medical professionals, many of them neurodivergent themselves and all honest enough to share the gap between their own ideal and their ACTUAL self-care.Find Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham every Tuesday on Spotify, Apple, YouTube, Substack, and wherever you get your podcasts.Learn to love and care for all your parts, from the soles of your feet to your soul.And for bonus content, polyvagal-informed journal prompts and more, sign up for my free newsletter, Míle Buíochas Mondays, plus 100s of free body mind practices, at solestosoul.ieLINKShttps://www.livescience.com/health/fertility-pregnancy-birth/the-choice-of-sperm-is-entirely-up-to-the-egg-so-why-does-the-myth-of-racing-sperm-persistFree Downloads https://solestosoul.ie/free-downloadsPolyvagal Purrs https://solestosoul.ie/felineMeggan Watterson https://www.instagram.com/megganwatterson/Jean Shinoda Bolenhttps://www.jeanbolen.com/Sally Kemptonhttps://www.sallykempton.com/Moon Mnáhttps://moonmna.ie/Laura Dowlinghttps://lauradowlingofficial.com/Dr Karen Wardhttps://drkarenwardtherapist.ie/Clodgah O’Connorhttp://clodaghoconnor.com/Chapters0:00 Systemic oppression and the red thread0:42 Podcast introduction and rebrand1:44 Introducing the Divine Feminine2:56 How Divine Femininity has been hijacked4:53 Reclaiming balance and receptive energy5:42 Personal journey with the Divine Feminine7:33 Erasure of women in spiritual history8:25 The red thread and reconnecting inward9:42 Polyvagal theory and empowerment10:06 Feel. Love. Heal. framework overview10:36 Feel: exploring your relationship with the Divine Feminine13:00 Love: healing, acceptance and reclaiming power15:20 Heal: connection, circles and co-regulation16:33 Closing reflection and inner connectionFULL TRANSCRIPTTo recognise that it is systemic oppression, I got a little thread, a little red thread tattoo a few weeks ago after I had gum surgery and found out I couldn’t swim for an extra week or so, so it’s just my little reminder about that thread that connects us back thousands and thousands of years and that divine love is within all of us, all our genders, like whatever gender we are and that women, we just need to go inwardHi, you’re listening to Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD. Learn to love and care for all your parts, including your trauma and AuDHD, from the soles of your feet to your soul. So this was previously the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.I hope you’re enjoying exploring the rebranded site solestosoul.ie, accessing all the free resources at www.solestosoul.ie/free-downloads - finding out how you might work with me.I’m Eve Menezes-Cunningham, I’m your host, I’m a columnist, author, podcast host and producer. I’m a trauma therapist, trauma survivor, AuDHD-er and AuDHD coach and self-care coach, where I integrate all of my offerings from psychosynthesis counselling to crystal therapy, including NLP, EFT, integrative counselling and coaching.I’m forgetting something quite major, life coaching. Let me know if you’ve got any questions and as you listen to today’s episode, I hope that you’ll connect with how you’re feeling.We’re working with Divine Feminine, not Divine Femininity. I recently became aware from some younger women that the Divine Feminine, which I’ve been working with for decades, and increasingly more and more of us are, after thousands and thousands of years of patriarchy and being left out. I was apparently, when I was a small child, when we moved from London to Essex, I asked the priest when I was four, why were there no women priests? And I think because my name is Eve, I took the Bible very to heart. I was raised Catholic and the recognition that women and minorities were systematically erased, that Christianity, Christ consciousness was all about equality and love for all and peace and the way it’s been so hijacked.But that’s not what this is about. Divine Femininity has been hijacked. I came across fairly recently, the idea of the egg and the cosmic egg as Meggan Watterson talks about.And the idea is that it’s this ultimate, kind of in her beautiful card, the Divine Feminine Oracle. The cosmic egg made me think of something I heard through Kate Northrup. So her mother, Christiane Northrup, Dr. Christiane Northrup, did amazing work around wisdom of menopause a long, long time ago, decades ago.And she, Oprah helped her popularise it. Unfortunately, she’s gone quite conspiracy theorist. But one thing that I really remember loving what I heard, we grow up in this patriarchal society, sex education, it’s very much the sperm, the strongest and impregnates and all of that.Whereas apparently, the egg chooses the sperm. And that was my alarm. I’ve got a client in a few minutes.I’m going to just start this again when I have more time. No, I’m not. It’s all good.So it’s very much the language we grew up in with this white supremacist patriarchal society is all about the man, all about the sperm, all about the like the strongest sperm, like impregnates, like kind of fertilises the egg, whereas apparently, the egg chooses the sperm.[There’s a link in the show notes about how this keeps being discovered by scientists, forgotten and rediscovered – much like the Divine Feminine]So where I heard about how Divine Femininity, femininity was being used against women, the idea of being very passive, being very receptive in a way of being very submissive, like we all have masculine energy, we all have feminine energy. And the more imbalanced we are, the more we’re using all of it, the more joyful and lovely our lives are.But if it’s being used against people but at the same time, many women, myself included, have to work on recreating that more receptive egg energy, where we’re able to receive good things where we’re able to not be do.Like for a long time, it was like women can be everything that men can be. And it’s that women end up then typically doing all the things we can step back, we can just be. My introduction to working with the Divine Feminine really helped saved my life in my 20s, my early 20s.So initially reading people like Jean Shinoda Bolen, Goddesses in Everywoman, where she talked about the Greek goddess archetypes. And then Awakening Shakti, Sally Kempton, I was kind of reconnecting with my Indian heritage. I’m Indian Irish, born in London, sound English, look white.But it was lovely learning more about I’m looking up at my bookshelf there. And in case you can see, that’s not a very good way to show you. But that was really gorgeous learning more...

Today’s episode builds on Episode 48: Cattitude: Purr! Hiss! Freeze! and the Polyvagal Purrs approach I developed years ago to include MORE of the Divine. More of what inspires awe, love, hope and other transpersonal – beyond the person – qualities. Nature? (Cats are part of nature and so are you!) Great art? What helps you connect with suPURR (super ventral) energy?How can you do more of these things on purpose?If you’re a trauma survivor and AuDHDer like me, or you simply find self-care more of a ‘should’ than a joy, this podcast is for you.I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham, a trauma therapist, AuDHD and self-care coach, senior accredited supervisor, columnist and author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-Care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing.Each Tuesday I share a mix of solo episodes and conversations with other self-care professionals. From other therapists, coaches, yoga teachers and authors to neuroscientists and medical professionals, many of them neurodivergent themselves and all honest enough to share the gap between their own ideal and their ACTUAL self-care.Find Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham every Tuesday on Spotify, Apple, YouTube, Substack, and wherever you get your podcasts.Learn to love and care for all your parts, from the soles of your feet to your soul.And for bonus content, polyvagal-informed journal prompts and more, sign up for my free newsletter, Míle Buíochas Mondays, at solestosoul.ieLINKSDeb Danahttps://www.rhythmofregulation.com/Stephen Porgeshttps://www.stephenporges.com/365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing https://solestosoul.ie/bookCattitude: Purr! Hiss! Freeze! Episode 48 of Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham watchCHAPTERS0:00 Not about spiritual bypassing1:07 Podcast introduction and rebrand1:28 Background with polyvagal theory2:18 Introducing a fourth state2:59 Purr! ventral vagal safety and connection3:25 Hiss! sympathetic survival stress response3:58 Freeze! dorsal vagal shutdown4:26 Naming and understanding nervous system states5:22 Introducing suPURR (super ventral)6:01 Feel: self-care practices to access suPURR8:07 Love: connecting with your inner self9:43 Heal: collective care and co-regulation10:53 Awe, DHEA and reducing stress11:39 Focusing on hope and positive stories12:29 Closing and reflection promptHASTHAGS#polyvagalpurrs#newpodcastepisode#traumainformed#yourepartofthedivine#evemenezescunninghamFULL TRANSCRIPTIt’s not about spiritual bypassing, very much not. If you take the example of yoga, if you have a yoga practice or any kind of psycho-spiritual practice, I’m always struck, because I’m a yoga therapist as well, watching people when I’m teaching, doing it myself. I know that I can be going through an emotional rollercoaster and look very serene.I also know that feeling all the feelings, allowing what’s coming up for to come up is so, so powerful. This is not about pretending super, awe, pride, joy, all the things, love. It’s about really connecting with all your parts and knowing that there’s so much more to you than all of the angst, everything you’ve survived, everything you’re worried about, challenges you might be facing, being able to connect with that more than, but also recognising the reality, recognising what is.You’re listening to Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham. It used to be the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and I’m still getting used to the rebrand after so long. Here’s little Meadbh and it feels appropriate for today’s episode where I’m introducing a fourth state.I’ve been working with Polyvagal Theory since I learned about it in 2011. From 2013, when I adopted Rainbow Magnificat, I started using her to help me with my own inner critic, with my own healing of my nervous system and trauma recovery. Then as the other cats came into the picture, I learned more and more, did more and more training, got more and more experience, saw just how effective all these ways of working are with clients.I’ve been presenting on it. I’ve written about it in journals. I love being paid to find pictures of the rescue cats to illustrate quite a heavy theory.It really does help people understand it better. More recently, I’ve added a fourth. Deb Dana, who made polyvagal theory so much more accessible, it’s Stephen Porges’ baby and she made it more accessible to clinicians.She does phenomenal work. She talks about super ventral. For ventral vagal, I call it Purr! because in an ideal world, we have that feeling of safety and connection.We’re like a cat at ease, able to purr, enjoy life. We’re curious. We’re happy.It’s safe to connect. Life feels good. It’s all purry.That doesn’t mean cats aren’t able to change their state, just as we do. We’re not in ventral vagal or what I call Purr! the whole time, but the more we can have that curiosity, that compassion, whatever’s going on around us, whatever’s going on inside us, the better for our overall wellbeing.Hiss! is what I call the sympathetic survival response, that stress response. When we feel under threat, when we feel disconnected from people, when we act out, we might fight, we might flee. These are all adaptive survival responses. Nothing wrong with it, but in an ideal world, if we can’t even find compassion for ourselves, Deb Dana says even one drop of curiosity is all we need and beginning to think what might help you, might get you back into that Purr! That ventral vagal.Then we have the dorsal vagal, what I call Freeze! Where the system is overwhelmed and we’re in collapse. We might be numbing. We might be dissociating.We might be indulging in habits that enable us to numb, but it’s feeling hopeless. It’s feeling overwhelmed. It’s not a happy, joyful place to be by any stretch.I go into all of these stages, all of these states in episode 48. So if you want to listen to that, but just for yourself, just getting a sense of, I encourage people to find their own names for them. It’s just Purr! Hiss! Freeze! helps because it is easier to remember for most people than ventral vagal, sympathetic survival and dorsal vagal.The key is remembering your nervous system is never wrong. Your nervous system has kept you alive. It’s kept you safe. It’s helped you deal with whatever you’ve had to survive. They’re all adaptive survival responses. Someone who has grown up knowing that it’s safe to connect with others is an advantage.It’s like I heard some person say growing up with parents with regulated nervous systems is like growing up with millionaires for parents. And it kind of is, but at the same time, whatever age you are, wherever you are, we can begin to heal it.Today, I want to introduce what I’m calling suPURRThat’s su, then PURR. And it’s for Deb Dana’s super ventral. And it’s where we bring in the more than the person, the more than the spiritual, the transpersonal and the thinking of the kinds of things you can do to make it more likely that you’ll be able to connect with this amazing energy, which of course helps us be more in ventral vagal, more in that Purr!For the Feel part of the framework, that’s the like lowercase s self-care, the regulatory things we can do, think about things you can physically do when you have the bandwidth to bring you into suPURR or super ventral. So it might be taking yourself to the beach or to the ocean or to a mountain or to a forest or some kind of nature that feeds your soul, that helps you feel.It might be taking yourself down the driveway to watch a sunset or sunrise. It might be taking yourself to a gallery to view some art that touches your soul. It might be taking yourself to a concert or whatever it is, think about the kind of things that help you get beyond Purr!It might take more energy and the more you can do, the more you can connect with this, the more you can fill your environment with things that promote you remembering. Nature is wonderful for so many people, but it’s not limited to nature.It can be, I’m going back at time of recording, I’m planning my first trip back to London in, it will be two years. And the idea of seeing some of the architecture, some of the arts, obviously people, loved ones will be amazing. But whatever brings you or whatever inspires you, whatever helps you connect with that, WOW, I can’t believe maybe you did something incredible, or it might be like a seventh wonder of the world, or it might be an amazing piece of art by someone else. Or it might be thinking about an incredible feat that someone has survived or endured, or like a new creation.Think about what helps you connect with that suPURR beyond energy when you have the bandwidth to do that regulatory self-care. When it comes to the love part of the framework, the Feel. Love. Heal. framework I developed, let yourself just be. Remind yourself that you don’t have to go outward at all.You can go inward. You can connect with the divinity within yourself, just as cats don’t need reminders of their divinity, of their magnificence. You have that within you.You don’t need to change a thing. You don’t need to be striving, or doing, or producing, or anything. You can just be and marvel at your body, for example.Even if you’re not happy with your body, your poor body has probably been through so much criticism because we live in a world where so much judgement is placed on these bodies that...

ACCESS 100s OF FREE BODY-MIND PRACTICES, POLYVAGAL-INFORMED JOURNAL PROMPTS AND SO MUCH MORE AT HTTPS://SOLESTOSOUL.IEWhat does self-care look like when you’re 25, newly independent, and realising that taking care of yourself is up to you? In this week’s episode, I’m joined by one of my favourite yoga teachers and youth worker, the delightful Emily Rosenkranz.As with all my guests, we get into the ideal and ACTUAL daily self-care, Self care and collective care.Since recording this episode, I (twice her age) was inspired to keep MY phone outside the bedroom. Having got over my concern that a serial killer would break in (and my partner suggesting I ask to borrow theirs), I remembered the decades I walked the earth before phones were a thing (in my life at least).My first Phone Free Night, I spent half an hour standing in the hallway scrolling before making it to the bedroom BUT it’s worth it.Other topics include the simple morning journaling practice it took three years to actually start, shaking for trauma healing, the magic of collective healing through women’s circles, co-regulation, and what it feels like to cry in a room full of people without anyone needing to fix a thing.Do you sleep with your phone in the bedroom? Let us know in the comments or email [email protected] grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS0:00 In an ideal world my days would revolve around self-care and self-love0:14 Podcast introduction and Eve’s background4:26 Introducing Emily Rosenkranz5:08 Emily’s work in yoga and youth work6:13 The Feel. Love. Heal. framework explained8:03 Ideal self-care and building supportive daily routines10:03 Keeping the phone out of the bedroom for better wellbeing17:04 Self-love, yoga practice and connecting with the body18:39 Shaking, crying and releasing the stress cycle22:09 Breathwork and pranayama for nervous system regulation24:30 Community, co-regulation and women’s circles28:15 Advice to a younger self about healing and change30:44 Reflection and closing thoughtsLINKShttps://www.instagram.com/emilyrosenkranz/https://moonmna.ie/Dr Karen Ward on energy work and Sacred Irelandhttps://solestosoul.ie/book#stresscycle#emilyrosenkranz#traumainformedyoga#neurodivergence#evemenezescunningham

Are you curious about how ADHD medication might work for you? Maybe you’ve already tried it? Or you’re happy with your prescription and it’s changed your life for the better? I’d love to hear from you.My journey with ADHD medication (and ADHD and AuDHD) is still very much unfolding but here’s Part 2 of my evolving journey and some of the ways in which I’ve been using self-care practices as medication on days I can’t take it.Both AND.If you can take it daily, brilliant. If you’re not taking it at all, brilliant. We’re all different and this is purely my experience now (likely different to if I’d tried it decades ago).I hope you’ll find it helpful and connect with (if you haven’t already) others to learn from their experiences too.le grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS0:00 Considering ADHD medication and sharing personal experience0:30 Podcast introduction and Eve’s background4:47 Why it was time for an ADHD medication update5:28 Starting medication and adjusting the dosage6:05 Side effects and why I don’t take it every day7:20 What medication changed about my daily life8:59 Using the Feel. Love. Heal. framework9:11 Movement, exercise and regulating ADHD symptoms12:45 Accepting medication and letting go of shame14:01 Community, neurodivergence and shared experiences15:37 Reflecting on whether medication is right for you17:01 Reflection and closing thoughtsLINKSWill ADHD Medication Work for Me?https://solestosoul.ie/2025/07/29/will-adhd-medication-work-for-me-episode-69-of-the-feel-better-every-day-podcast/HASHTAGS#adhdmedication#adhdsupport#selfcareforadhdFULL TRANSCRIPTAre you curious about whether ADHD medication might work for you? I’m not a pharmacist, I’m not a psychiatrist, but I shared my initial eight days diary of medication last year (Episode 69: Will ADHD Medication Work for Me?), and there’ll be a link to that episode in the show notes, and that was the very early days, and I realised that it was probably due an update.If you’re a trauma survivor and AuDHDer like me, or you simply find self-care more of a “should” than a joy, this podcast is for you.I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham, a trauma therapist, AuDHD and self-care coach, senior accredited supervisor, columnist and author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-Care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing.Each Tuesday I share a mix of solo episodes and conversations with other self-care professionals. From other therapists, coaches, yoga teachers and authors to neuroscientists and medical professionals, many of them neurodivergent themselves and all honest enough to share the gap between their own ideal and their ACTUAL self-care.Find Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham every Tuesday on Spotify, Apple, YouTube, Substack, and wherever you get your podcasts.Learn to love and care for all your parts, from the soles of your feet to your soul.And for bonus content, polyvagal-informed journal prompts and more, sign up for my free newsletter, Míle Buíochas Mondays, at solestosoul.ieAre you curious about whether ADHD medication might work for you?I’m not a pharmacist, I’m not a psychiatrist, but I shared my initial eight days diary of medication last year, and there’ll be a link to that episode in the show notes, and that was the very early days, and I realised that it was probably due an update, because I’m recording this in February 2026, so it’s been a good while, and my relationship to medication has changed.I was put on Tyvense, it’s a stimulant medication, aka Vyvanse, and initially I felt like I was cheating at life, it felt amazing, and it was, it still is, but especially at that time, there was an enormous amount of stress behind the scenes that I had no control over, so I wasn’t put up to the full dose, because I didn’t want to go up.And I actually then, with side effects, went back down to a lower dose, so my current dose is 30mg, and I don’t take it every day, because as much as I love it, it doesn’t agree with me, so it agrees with me in the ways in which it really helps, but it doesn’t agree in terms of, I’ve developed skin conditions, it impacted my digestion, and I had worse hot flushes than I’d had when I was perimenopausal and so there were other things as well, a lot of dry mouth, but I think it was really the skin conditions that really scared me a bit and I was lucky I didn’t have heart issues around it, because that had been a delay initially with beginning it, because an abnormality had shown up, but I was told that was fine after having additional tests.And my journey is going to be different to yours or anyone else’s, but my hope is that by me sharing some of what has helped me and what continues to help me, it will give you ideas, and also the more we all share, the more we learn from each other, it’s really reassuring to hear other people’s experiences.And I miss it, like I now take it once or twice a week and I arrange my workload around it where possible, because it is amazing being able to focus and concentrate and not be kind of having to double check a four-digit number several times in order to type it in.Today I didn’t take it, and I don’t know if you can see, I managed to kind of bruise myself taking a top off in yoga, one of my layers, I tripped over a sofa on my way to the swimming pool, I went back out to the car because I wasn’t sure if I’d locked it or not, before that I had to take a swimsuit out of my emergency swim kit, because I had packed up my fins, my goggles, my snorkel, my swim hat, my toiletries, my towel and not a swimsuit, so luckily I had a spare.But this used to be me every day, like returning to the house several times, had I locked it, what had I forgotten, going back, the whole like chaos, and just thinking that was life.And then when I got to try the medication it was like, oh my god, this is amazing, I get to leave the house and go! So I do find the contrast, especially the day after one of my days ON the medication. But at the same time I have compassion for myself and I know that there are things I can do to help.Moving into the Feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework, so the Feel part is the regulatory, the self-care, the things we can actually do when we have the bandwidth to help us feel better. For me, swimming is huge, and since learning that balance is really helpful for the cerebellum in terms of treating ADHD symptoms, I do even more underwater handstands and I walk on my hands, I don’t know what it looks like from above, but in my imagination it’s very Simone Biles, very elegant, it’s probably not, but just feeling, walking, I pretend to be an underwater dinosaur, it makes me very happy.And I realise that I’m working with my brain, I’m going to four yoga classes a week most weeks, I’m swimming in the pool three times a week most weeks, time in the steam room to completely relax, still doing my practically almost every day yoga nidra, I facilitated one of my Westport Lunar Circles last night (at time of recording) and created a lovely yoga nidra for the group there.I just adore yoga nidra because it helps with dopamine, it helps with deep rest and relaxation, it gives our wandering brain something to focus on, to dip in and out of, the balancing poses in yoga can be really helpful, the following the instructions, the listening to someone else, and taking that moment, any kind of exercise, really, really wonderful for us.I’m not cycling as much as I’d like to be, the weather, unfortunately, since I learned to drive, I’m less keen to get out on my bike in the rain, and I’m not walking as much as I was. I am, but not up and down the lane as much, which I miss and I will get back to, but it’s a real privilege being able to attend so many yoga classes and swim a lot, so think about movement that works for you, think about movement that helps you.I really see it as insurance, I see it as medicine, both for my mental health, for my brain, for the ADHD traits, for my mood and also for my joints, for my muscles. So many neurodivergent people have chronic pain conditions, also with trauma and inflammation, the body attacks itself so much, like going on, I want to do what I can to heal as much as possible.And I also want, when I tell people in my imagination 97 is going to be my peak, I am joking, I know that there are things that I can do to make 97 hopefully as healthy and fun as possible and I want to do them, it’s not just enjoyable now, but thinking about my future, wanting to be independent, wanting to enjoy life for as long as possible, think about what makes you feel good, think about the kind of movement, the kind of exercise, the kind of activities, the kind of behaviours, the things that are easy to do and the things that take more effort.I used to have to cycle a few miles to get to the pool but I knew that it made me feel better and it was worth doing, the cycling feels good as well, you might have something in your home that you can do quite easily, you might have things where you don’t have the energy to do the bigger things, you can do something that moves you in that direction, just get to know yourself, get to know what works.Moving to the Love part, I’m accepting it, I’m accepting how lucky I was to be able to try the medication, I’m lucky to still be able to take it once, maybe twice a week and I’m lucky that I thankfully don’t need it when I’m hyper-focused on some writing or...

This week, for the Spring Equinox and World Oral Health Day, I’m sharing some self-care ideas for supporting yourself through dental treatment with sensory differences.I’d been feeling quite proud of myself for handling the gum surgery and all it brought up (flashbacks etc) but then, boom, dental claim rejected.So this whole episode about advocating for yourself, with sensory differences and other AuDHD traits and symptoms, while helpful, didn’t help me with the finances of it all as I’d thought I had been advocating for myself and don’t know enough about dentist language to be able to discern in the same way that the insurance people do. I’d never had to deal with it before. So while I’m improving with the self-compassion but am feeling pretty frustrated that am €500 short and need to pay out loads more in two weeks!And that’s life!Progress not perfection!Healing being far from linear!And, with my ongoing aim to not argue with reality and ask how any problem is actually trying to help me, I guess I needed the gum surgery and couldn’t have made it happen had I known it wouldn’t have been covered.What I really notice is that even with my lack of dental and periodontal jargon knowhow, my attitude towards myself is kinder. For most of my 50 years, I’d have been, “I should have somehow KNOWN” whereas now I’m like, you know what? I’m not a dentist. I have no idea what any of the labels mean and that’s on them for being misleading and not at least having a glossary with lay terms.How about YOU?As you watched or listened and scanned all your parts (including your teeth!) from the soles of your feet to your soul, what needs YOUR attention?Are you fobbing yourself off in any way?Look after yourself and let me know what helps you do the far less pampery and indulgent but very important types of self-care in terms of looking after your teeth, your finances and this one and only body you have for your entire life…Le grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS0:00 Finding support and community around sensory differences0:43 Podcast introduction and Eve’s background5:09 World Oral Health Day and anxiety about dental care6:03 Neurodivergence, shame and struggles with dental hygiene8:49 Advocating for sensory needs during dental treatment11:42 Healing after surgery and the impact of long-term infection15:04 Using the Feel. Love. Heal. framework for medical anxiety17:52 Self-compassion and asking for support during treatment23:10 Collective care and involving others in your healing25:06 Encouragement to seek treatment and share experiences27:18 Reflection and closing thoughtsLINKSWorld Oral Health Day -https://www.worldoralhealthday.org/Book bonus videos - https://solestosoul.ie/book/yoga-videos/Metta meditation - https://solestosoul.ie/2019/10/02/self-care-metta-meditation-for-when-the-news-is-especially-challenging/#worldoralhealthday#audhd#trauma#dentist#solestosoulcarefortraumaandaudhd#evemenezescunningham

It was such a delight to talk to Therapy Growth Group and Good Enough Counsellors founder and fellow ADHDer Josephine Hughes again for Episode 101. Josephine hosts two podcasts (there’s a link to an episode I was on with her in the links below), Good Enough Counsellors and Gloriously Unready.Previously, the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, you’re listening to what’s now the Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham podcast. Learn to love and care for all your parts, including your AuDHD and trauma, from the soles of your feet to your soul.This week, Josephine shared her love of chocolate with my Míle Buíochas Mondays subscribers and in this full episode of the podcast, Josephine talks about the journey she took with her church community in terms of becoming more inclusive and loving.“You can be fully inclusive and therefore be in line theologically with the Bible, or you can say, no, no, no, that’s not what the Bible says at all. And really between the two positions, people try and fudge it, but it’s either one or the other. So our church, very fortunately, decides to go for full inclusivity. And it was a journey we all went on together, but we did lose a lot of people.”She also shares her love of music and ever-increasing self-compassion.Again, as you listen, notice what you’re most aware of in your physical, energetic, emotional, mental and spiritual bodies as you scan all your parts, from the soles of your feet to your soul.Let me know in the comments or by emailing me at [email protected] grá (with love),EveHASHTAGS#josephinehughes#evemenezescunningham#goodenoughcounsellors#faithCHAPTERS0:00 Self-criticism and the idea of being good enough0:19 Podcast introduction and Eve’s background4:30 Re-introducing Josephine Hughes6:03 The Good Enough Counsellors community and imposter syndrome12:09 Ideal vs good-enough self-care15:06 The importance of being heard and understood16:20 Music, faith and feeling loved and accepted21:02 Community care and finding an inclusive church24:28 Advice to a younger self about self-worth28:27 Where to find Josephine and her work29:45 Reflections and mini energy and body scanLINKShttps://solestosoul.ie/book for free resources including book bonus videos for 365 Ways to Feel BetterEpisode 23: Josephine HughesEve guesting on Josephine’s Good Enough Counsellors PodcastConnect with JosephineGood Enough Counsellors:https://josephinehughes.com/Gloriously Unready Podcast: https://gloriouslyunready.com/podcast/Facebook Good Enough Counselling Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/goodenoughcounsellorsImposter Syndromehttps://paulineroseclance.com/impostor_phenomenon.htmlRead my interview with Marianne Williamson from Rapport, Spring 2009 https://issuu.com/rapportmag/docs/rapport_spring_09/24

Happy 100th Episode to Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham (formerly Feel Better Every Day)! Am sorting all the links to ensure my biggest rebrand since 2010 and some aren’t there yet so while I’m hoping you can watch or listen wherever you get your podcasts, please let me know if you have any issues (as well as any feedback, comments or questions!).Am so delighted to have the fantabulous Dr Miguel Toribio-Mateas back with me to talk about how his self-care, Self care and collective care have evolved (since episode 24!) and his new book, ADHD Body and Mind: A Compassionate Guide to Rewilding Your Nervous System with Neuroscience, Nutrition, and Gut-Brain Health.Described as “a book that speaks to both your biology and your belonging. It’s a unique, neurodiversity-affirmative resource that reframes ADHD as a natural neurotype, a different way of living and making sense of the world, rather than a disorder. It expands neuroscience beyond the brain and into the whole body. Showing how gut, microbes, breath, heart, hormones and immune system are always in conversation. ADHD Body and Mind reimagines nutrition and gut-brain health through a non-diet lens, offering flexible, compassionate tools that nourish body and mind without rules, shame or restriction and extends gentle invitations, not prescriptions, to honour your ADHD as a whole body-mind experience, rather than reducing it to symptoms to be managed. In a nutshell, ADHD Body and Mind is a companion, offering space to breathe, reflect, and return to yourself, again and again. It will help you reconnect with your body’s natural rhythms, release some of the weight of shame and perfectionism, and discover a way of living with ADHD that feels not just manageable, but meaningful.”I am so looking forward to reading it! I’ve pre-ordered my copy (it’s out on 21st April!) and you can too, wherever you buy your books.In the meantime, I hope you’ll enjoy listening as much as I enjoyed talking to him again.le grá (with love),EveLINKSDr Miguel Toribios-Mateas:Listen to our previous conversation, episode 24 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast wherever you get your podcasts or at https://evemc.substack.com/p/the-feel-better-every-day-podcast-b80?utm_source=publication-searchInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/drmiguelmateasWebsite:https://drmiguelmateas.com/My new sitehttps://solestosoul.ieCHAPTERS(Maybe slightly off as re-recorded intro to go with the rebrand from Feel Better Every Day to Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD)0:00 - Being present and meeting others with kindness0:47 - Celebrating episode 1000:54 - Introducing Dr Miguel Toribio-Mateas2:09 - A compassionate guide to ADHD body and mind6:14 - Listening to your needs without forcing others12:11 - Mindfulness, love and connection through animals20:50 - Community, belonging and protecting your energy27:24 - Learning self-acceptance over time31:04 - Where to connect and final reflections32:02 - Podcast closing and listener invitationFULL TRANSCRIPTPresent means that if there is somebody else in the room and they have other needs, you appreciate that their needs are different, and how can you be kind towards them so when you expect them to understand that you need to stand up and fix the curtain, whatever that might be for you. The situation of the curtain is going to be different to different people, and how can you do it in a way that you’re kind to them so when you expect them to be kind to you and not tell you god you’re such a weirdo and feel oh I feel attacked because I’ve just been told that I’m like I’m a weirdo, but you know do things in a way that you find the middle ground and present.Previously the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, this is now Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD with Eve Menezes Cunningham. Learn to love and care for all your parts (including your trauma and AuDHD) from the soles of your feet to your soul.Welcome to episode 100 of the formerly Feel Better Every Day now Soles to Soul Care for Trauma and AuDHD Podcast. I’m delighted to welcome back one of my early guests from episode 24, Dr Miguel Toribio-Mateas.I still remember how nervous I was sending him that initial message asking if he’d like to be a guest when I was beginning. And he was the first person I heard the term AuDHD from, and he’s been such an inspiration and kind guide on this journey for me personally, just an absolute delight, so I’m so happy to have him back where he’ll be talking about how his own self-care has evolved but most excitingly his new book.I hope you love the episode as much as I adore this person who has done so much to help me and others accept and work with our differently wired brains. Let me know what you’re going to do differently as a result of listening.So thank you so much for coming back Dr Miguel Toribio-Mateas.Thank you for having me.You’re so welcome.I wanted you here to help me celebrate my 100th episode.Oh wonderful, that’s great, I’m honoured.And I also want to celebrate you and your work and your new upcoming book, so can you say a little bit about that?Yeah, absolutely. I’ve got a book coming out, it’s called ADHD Body and Mind and it’s a guide, it’s actually the title goes on, it’s a compassionate guide to rewiring your nervous system with neuroscience, nutrition and gut brain health, and that’s what it says on the tin basically.It’s a guide, it’s not a prescription, it’s not a protocol for fixing your ADHD, it’s about celebrating the fact that a lot of people will resonate more with certain aspects of it, some people may resonate with other aspects of it, some people might feel that they struggle more and I talk about the struggles, some people might think that it’s actually a source of creativity and I talk about that, so it’s quite balanced in that sense, but also it goes in four parts.The first part is that kind of introduction to what is ADHD, how do you experience it, you know whichever way you experience it you can just make it your own, and then I move on to the brain and the nervous system, so what happens in the brain and the nervous system when you have ADHD and try to explain things up because I find that when I understand why something is happening it sheds light on it, so it’s not kind of like a mystical thing anymore, so you can understand better why we may be better at reading instructions as opposed to maybe hearing them, so we may be in a way saying yes I’m getting this and then it’s coming in an ear and going out of the other one, and when you try and remember something like you know three minutes later it’s gone because your working memory is not having a good day that particular day.I talk a lot about all of those processes in plain English so people can understand them, nervous system, the gut-brain access and the gut-brain connection, nutrition and also spirituality and self-care, and that’s kind of like it builds up towards that because I find that with the best of intentions if you just focus on the biology of things, on the molecules and the, you know, eat this food because it will help you with focus or restrict that food because it will help you with RSD (Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria) or whatever it is, you’re kind of like missing the fact that we are multi-layered beings and we have a layer that needs connection and rituals and kindness and spirituality, whatever that means for you, whether it’s religion, whether it’s just connecting with your Self or with nature or whatever that means for you.There’s a wide range of spiritual practices and I think that’s really really important, and it’s not something that people talk about so much about AuDHD and spirituality, but I think it’s a really important part of it and it’s full of exercises that bring you back to the body. The whole thing that kind of like elevates the pitch in a way is that I feel that a lot of people with ADHD are, we are in our heads a lot of the time and not so much in our bodies, so I try to bring you back to the body with loads of kind of somatic kind of exercises throughout the book so you can return to your body, so you can feel more at ease in your body and that is going to have a knock-on effect on how you feel in your mind as well.Yeah, wonderful, so I’m really looking forward to how your ideal and actual self-care in the various parts of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework have evolved, so the Feel bit, the regulatory, the things we can do to help ourselves, and you were saying before we started recording about the curtain, I don’t know if you want to say anything about that, but what are like your essential daily and regular practices and what would be your ideal?Yeah, I think it’s from when we talked last time, I mean we talked about movement and that’s still important for me and particularly walking because I find walking really relaxing, so I know it’s exercise but it’s also really good for my mental health and I start the day with a long walk anyway with my dog and that sets me up for the day.But also we were talking about these curtains, I’m in the room, I mean I’ve got these like heavy curtains at one end of the room and one of them had kind of come off the pole and I was looking at it the other day and it was completely doing my head in, it was literally just breaking my brain thinking...

This week’s episode follows on from Episode 98 and the seemingly endless trauma triggers from the news. It feels like it’s been getting more triggering for years and years but amping up even more recently. I keep telling myself it’s all coming up for healing and sunlight is the best disinfectant. That, ultimately, we are in the process of remembering we’re all connected, we all deserve safety, connection, love and the potential to thrive and we’re creating a new, more peaceful, free and equitable – for ALL – world.And we can do nothing to help ourselves or anyone else if we’re quietly rocking back and forth, in floods of tears, feeling helpless and hopeless. By coming together, supporting and speaking up for each other, we can find joy and hope (while doing the work we all need to do in the giant group project called life) in more sustainable ways.This simple, quick and easy (the more you practice, the quicker it gets) not only helps to clear our own energy fields and connect with our own miraculous Self but it helps us clear the space in meetings, communities and the world at large so we’re ultimately defying the dystopia some people are perfectly happy for us to feel is inevitable. It is not. We get to remember the power we all have as individuals and to amplify it by working together, energetically and in practical ways, too.Let me know a) how you get on with the meditation and b) what kind of world you’d LIKE to help contribute to building – comment or email [email protected] grá (with love),EveThis week’s episode follows on from Episode 98 and the seemingly endless trauma triggers from the news. It feels like it’s been getting more triggering for years and years but amping up even more recently. I keep telling myself it’s all coming up for healing and sunlight is the best disinfectant. That, ultimately, we are in the process of remembering we’re all connected, we all deserve safety, connection, love and the potential to thrive and we’re creating a new, more peaceful, free and equitable – for ALL – world.And we can do nothing to help ourselves or anyone else if we’re quietly rocking back and forth, in floods of tears, feeling helpless and hopeless. By coming together, supporting and speaking up for each other, we can find joy and hope (while doing the work we all need to do in the giant group project called life) in more sustainable ways.This simple, quick and easy (the more you practice, the quicker it gets) not only helps to clear our own energy fields and connect with our own miraculous Self but it helps us clear the space in meetings, communities and the world at large so we’re ultimately defying the dystopia some people are perfectly happy for us to feel is inevitable. It is not. We get to remember the power we all have as individuals and to amplify it by working together, energetically and in practical ways, too.Let me know a) how you get on with the meditation and b) what kind of world you’d LIKE to help contribute to building – comment or email [email protected] grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS0:00 Power, self-connection and the benefits of this energy clearing meditation0:51 Podcast intro, resources and weekly nervous system support2:52 Defying dystopia through self-care, boundaries and compassion3:53 Introducing the magnet clearing meditation5:03 Why this meditation is quick, adaptable and beginner-friendly6:09 Grounding the body and preparing the nervous system6:36 Clearing above and below to release inauthentic energy7:48 Clearing front and back for fears, pain and past experiences9:08 Clearing left and right for giving, receiving and contribution11:25 Filling the energy field with golden healing light13:30 Clearing the path ahead and staying in your miraculous Self14:59 Using the practice in daily life and difficult moments17:02 Closing reflections, ripple effects and staying connectedFULL TRANSCRIPTBut as with all of my work, I’m wanting you to remember that we have more power than we think we do. Wherever we are in the world, whatever’s going on around us, the more we connect with and look after our own self, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself, the more we connect with our own energies and work with them, befriending our trauma, histories and ADHD brains, helping ourselves heal with compassion for ourselves and others. Yes, absolutely setting boundaries. And this is where this meditation comes in.Hi, I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham and you’re listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. You can find out more and access older episodes at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and you can also access loads of free resources and find out more about the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing, the column I write for Platinum every month, other titles I contribute to, my work, loads of free resources I’ve created over the years.I really hope you enjoy this episode and if you haven’t already signed up for my free newsletter, it goes out on a Monday, Míle Buíochas Mondays. Míle buíochas means a thousand thank yous in Irish, which I’m very slowly learning and it’s polyvagal-informed journal prompts to help you each week. There’s the gratitude practice element, figuring out more of what brings you joy on a daily basis, what helps you feel in that ventral vagal, what I call Purr! when I use the rescue cats with the Polyvagal Purrs approach and I also share some of my own gratitude, some of the things that have helped me feel more in ventral vagal that week.Some of those will be resources that might benefit you and I also share news about upcoming events, special offers, things like that. The journal prompts also include encouragement to look at what is creating sympathetic survival responses (Hiss! with the Polyvagal Purrs approach) and potentially the dorsal vagal (Freeze!)It’s really helping you learn to map your own nervous system, get to know yourself and get to support yourself and it’s all free. If you haven’t already you can sign up at selfcarecoaching.net and if you have any questions again let me know, [email protected]. I hope you enjoy this episode.Welcome to episode 99 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. In today’s episode I am wanting to help you and me and everyone defy dystopia.A big ambition. But as with all of my work I’m wanting you to remember that we have more power than we think we do. Wherever we are in the world, whatever’s going on around us, the more we connect with and look after our own self, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself. The more we connect with our own energies and work with them befriending our trauma, histories and AuDHD brains, helping ourselves heal with compassion for ourselves and others. Yes, absolutely setting boundaries and this is where this meditation comes in. It’s one of my favourites.I work a lot with the nervous system and also with energy so the nervous system is incredible. It’s a wonderful tool. You’ll have access to older episodes where I go into that a lot and future episodes as well but today it’s an energy clearing meditation which I learned a long time ago in London.It’s a magnet clearing energy so if you imagine a magnet and how easily it draws iron filings to it, there’s no hassle, there’s no stress. It’s just what’s meant to do. All of the energy in our energy fields is neutral when it comes to the planet. We can release energies that aren’t authentically yours, that get in the way of your miraculous Self and send them deep into the centre of the earth where they can be reused, transmuted, recycled for the benefit of the planet so they’re no longer clogging up your energy field.The reason this is one of my favourite all-time meditations, I’ve been teaching meditation since 2001, 2002, different types. I did all sorts of complex ones through the crystal therapy training, through the yoga therapy. I adore many, many. I have daily practices myself. I do daily Metta, mindfulness, all sorts but this is something that is so simple and so quick and you can expand on it or you can do it very quickly. You keep your eyes open. You can close them if you want to but part of my training involved practising it walking through London, central London, Holborn.I learnt it from Art Giser, the creator of Energetic NLP and it’s just really lovely and really quick and really easy. So if you are in a position to do it now, if you’re driving, do not close your eyes. Do not even do this although as you practice you’ll be able to do it when driving. If you’re in traffic, absolutely. If you’re stressed in any way, it’s one of those immediate ways in which we just release inauthentic energies and allow our miraculous selves to flourish.So start by making yourself comfortable. So feet firmly on the ground. If they don’t reach, you may want to put a few cushions below you.Connecting with all the parts of the body that are sitting, that are connected with the chair, just feeling that support, that earth’s nourishing supportive energy below you. Lengthening through the spine to a degree that feels comfortable for you and imagining a magnet above your head, a few metres above your head, gently, effortlessly, easily releasing inauthentic energies from above. Any headaches, anything you’re struggling to understand, make sense of, any blocks to you reaching your dreams, your potential, your connection with...

This is an unexpected episode on account of the pain the news is causing so many survivors (myself included!). How do we continue to function let alone thrive when the messages we keep on getting is that perpetrators rights to do whatever they feel like doing trump our basic human rights including safety?I realise that this is a very sensitive topic and it is also a topic that impacts an enormous amount of people, huge amount of people, not just women but predominantly women and girls.An enormous amount is coming up for healing. Sunlight is a wonderful disinfectant but if you’re feeling raw, tender, hopeless or anything else right now, know that you’re not alone. Know that you looking after yourself (and accessing all the available supports and resources you want and need) and not giving up is a radical act.You deserve love. You deserve safety. You deserve care. You deserve pleasure. You deserve ALL good things and I hope the resources I share in this week’s episode will help you reconnect with your own favourites, too.Let me know how you’re getting on by email or in the comments.le grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS [these may be a little off this week due to episode order changing]0:00 News, sexual violence and collective triggering0:27 Podcast intro, resources, and newsletter3:04 Bandwidth, dysregulation and the Feel. Love. Heal. framework4:46 Feel – nervous system regulation and embodied safety5:45 Love – radical self-acceptance in painful times6:15 Heal – community, accountability and collective care7:39 Reclaiming your body and sensory self-regulation10:06 Healing is not linear – from despair to thriving13:19 Co-regulation, belonging and survivor communities16:24 Survivor stories, activism and the power of solidarity18:49 Power, oppression and not giving in to despair19:45 Choosing gentleness and imagining a better world20:47 Episode closing and next week’s episodeLINKS7 Simple and Effective Self-care Tools for Trauma Survivorshttps://selfcarecoaching.net/2018/09/28/7-simple-and-effective-self-care-tools-for-trauma-survivors/https://selfcarecoaching.net/trauma/ Access more self-care, Self care and collective care resourceshttps://selfcarecoaching.net/feline Find out more about the Polyvagal Purrs approachFULL TRANSCRIPTWe’re basically being given the message time and time again with Irish headlines about [convicted] sexual predators getting less [time in prison] than speeding offenders, with the whole Epstein files… So many examples of sexual predators getting away with it and that can be incredibly triggering.Hi, I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham and you’re listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.You can find out more and access older episodes at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and you can also access loads of free resources and find out more about the book 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing and the column I write for Platinum every month, other titles I contribute to, my work, loads of free resources I’ve created over the years. I really hope you enjoy this episode and if you haven’t already signed up for my free newsletter it goes out on a Monday, Míle Buíochas Mondays. Míle buíochas means a thousand thank yous in Irish which I’m very slowly learning and the idea is it’s polyvagal informed journal prompts to help you each week.There’s the gratitude practice element, figuring out more of what brings you joy on a daily basis, what helps you feel in that ventral vagal energy (what I call Purr!) when I use the rescue cats with the Polyvagal Purrs approach. I also share some of my own gratitude, some of the things that have helped me feel more in ventral vagal that week. Some of those will be resources that might benefit you and I also share news about upcoming events, special offers, things like that.The journal prompts also include encouragement to look at what is creating sympathetic survival responses (that Hiss! with the Polyvagal Purrs approach) and potentially the dorsal vagal (Freeze!) It’s really helping you learn to map your own nervous system, get to know yourself and get to support yourself. And it’s all free so if you haven’t already you can sign up at selfcarecoaching.net and if you have any questions again let me know [email protected]. I hope you enjoy this episode.Welcome to episode 98 [I CHANGED THE ORDER] of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and I’m wondering how you’re doing with everything that’s going on in the news and I know that a lot of people are being triggered. We’re basically being given the message time and time again with Irish headlines about sexual predators getting less than speeding offences in prison with the whole Epstein files.So many examples of sexual predators getting away with it and that can be incredibly triggering. I mean there’s a sexual predator, self-confessed sexual predator in the White House. He still owes E. Jean Carroll millions and millions having been found guilty twice and not to mention all the other horrors being inflicted on so many different kinds of people.I thought I’d do this episode not to be triggering but to recognise that life is triggering and to hopefully help you with my Feel. Love. Heal. framework. The idea is to help you be mindful about your bandwidth on any given day and recognising what’s going to be the most supportive kind of care on any given day.The Feel element is the regulatory self-care, the working with your nervous system, doing all the things that can help you feel better. Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful but that’s not everything. The Love part is the recognition that you like everyone else including predators are part of the divine. Part of nature. We’re all connected. We all share this one beautiful planet and it’s about accepting how painful and how unfair and how horrifying and how awful so much feels and is without getting sucked into it. It’s the kind of not arguing with reality and also recognising it’s OK to feel joy, it’s okay to feel like caught up in the beauty of the beginnings of spring in this hemisphere. It’s accepting what is, it’s accepting yourself exactly as you are, recognising again healing isn’t linear and sometimes you might feel absolutely fine and other times you might be absolutely floored with despair and like kind of moving into that dorsal vagal (what I call Freeze! with the Polyvagal Purrs approach).The Heal part is especially important with this kind of trauma, interpersonal trauma. Survivors coming together, women coming together, male allies coming together, proving not all men. Actions speak louder than words. Call your friends out. Don’t tolerate even the little comments which then are encouraging worse and worse behaviour.Chappell Roan, there was something about the singer, she found out that her management company was involved and her immediate reaction was to fire them and it’s like be in integrity, work with your community, let yourself be held in community and make sure that you’re a safe person to be holding people in your community.I realise that this is a very sensitive topic and it is also a topic that impacts an enormous amount of people, huge amount of people, not just women but predominantly women and girls.There are way too many male victims and non-binary and trans victims of sexual violence as well and doing things like moving into the Feel part of the framework, doing things that help you feel safe in your body, first of all making sure you are as safe as you can possibly be now. Do what you can to make yourself as safe as possible and once you are safe let yourself feel into that, let yourself reclaim your body, let yourself connect back into what feels good, different types of movements, different types of like kind of experiment with massage, experiment with like any kind of pleasurable feelings that help you remember the privilege that we have in terms of being embodied, having these bodies that enable us to experience so much joy in the world and recognising that what was done to you should never have been done to you, should never be done to anyone, but you can and will heal and it’s about having patience with yourself and building up a repertoire of things that feel good.I go on a lot about being underwater, yoga, things like that, but I feel really good when I’m like kind of cycling downhill, feeling the wind in my hair or doing an underwater handstand or really swimming my heart out or singing or like doing a stretch or balance or pose that’s feeling easier or just works in a really delightful, delicious way or enjoying a wonderful taste, food, drink, whatever it might be, enjoying the feeling of warmth or a delicious fabric like especially with sensory differences, with neurodivergence, get rid of clothes that don’t feel good, make your immediate environment as safe and as comfortable, as enjoyable to be in as possible. Delicious fabrics, I really love bamboo at the...

“We get a lot of meaning from creating spaces where people can come and connect, and feel like they’re in a place where they’re welcomed, and that some good things can happen.” ~ John Wilson, Co-director, Online EventsIt was SUCH a joy to talk to Online Events’ co-director, John Wilson. As well as talking about his own ideal and actual self-care, Self care and collective care practices, he shares some of what he’s learned through co-creating such a nourishing online community for therapists, counsellors and supervisors.Chapters0:01–2:26 Introduction, movement and nervous system support2:26–3:38 Welcoming John Wilson of Online Events3:38–6:22 John’s work, community building and setting the context6:22–9:10 The Feel part: movement, walking, and self-regulation9:10–12:16 Sleep, flexibility, and adapting self-care when plans change12:16–14:04 Letting go of perfection and allowing partial practices14:04–16:59 The Love part: nature, presence, and remembering connection16:59–19:01 The Heal part: community, meaning, and shared purpose at work19:01–22:38 Leadership, slowing down, and staying connected under pressure22:38–24:04 Advice to a younger self and sustaining long-term projects24:04–26:39 Closing reflections, where to find John, and final notesLinksWhere to find Online Events:Website:https://OnlinEvents.co.uk/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/Online Eventscpd/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Online EventsLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/Online Events/Twitter: https://twitter.com/Online Events_sazEpisode 86: Tracy Otsuka on the 43% of ADHDers with Excellent Mental HealthFULL TRANSCRIPTDefinitely movement is helpful for me. I’m not really a stationary person so anything that has movement in it is helpful for me. And that’s both physically and psychologically.Hi, I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham, and you’re listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. You can find out more, and access older episodes, at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com, and you can also access loads of free resources, and find out more about the book 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing, the column I write for Platinum every month, other titles I contribute to, my work, loads of free resources I’ve created over the years.I really hope you enjoy this episode, and if you haven’t already signed up for my free newsletter, it goes out on a Monday, Míle Buíochas Mondays. Míle Buíochas means a thousand thank yous in Irish, which I’m very slowly learning.It’s polyvagal informed journal prompts, to help you each week. There’s the gratitude practice element, figuring out more of what brings you joy on a daily basis, what helps you feel in that ventral vagal, what I call Purr! when I use the rescue cats, with the Polyvagal Purrs approach and I also share some of my own gratitudes, some of the things that have helped me feel more in the ventral vagal that week. Some of those will be resources that might benefit you.I also share news about upcoming events, special offers, things like that, but the journal prompts also include encouragement to look at what is creating sympathetic survival responses (that Hiss! with the Polyvagal Purrs approach) and, potentially, the dorsal vagal (Freeze!).It’s really helping you learn to map your own nervous system, get to know yourself, and get to support yourself, and it’s all free. So if you haven’t already, you can sign up at selfcarecoaching.net, and if you have any questions, again let me know [email protected] hope you enjoy this episode.Welcome John Wilson, thank you so much for joining me!Thank you, yes, thank you for having me on the podcast.My absolute pleasure. I know you through Online Events, I was one of the presenters at the conference last year for neurodivergence around the rescue cats [Polyvagal Purrs – selfcarecoaching.net/feline], and I just think you’ve done so incredibly with what you’ve created, and providing so much support to so many people. And I also, really obviously, I don’t know you very well, but you seem to embody this calm, or you exude this calm, where I imagine your life is anything but, with all you’re dealing with.I ask my guests about their ideal and actual self-care, but I’ll start by just asking you to introduce yourself, and maybe say a little bit about Online Events, and anything you want to allow people to find, where they can find you online, or anything you want to plug or promote.Thank you Eve, well, thank you for having me on the podcast, that’s very generous, and it’s lovely to be here, and be in the conversation with you, and the listeners as well. As you say, I’m part of Online Events, I’m one of two directors, a director with my sister Sandra Wilson, so we’re a sibling team. What can I say about Online Events, we started in 2009, so we were really early in the online learning space, particularly in the helping professions, so we’ve had lots of different kinds of adventures, and there was a big increase in the scope of our work over the pandemic as well, because so many more colleagues came online, that allowed us to run a lot more things, and create a lot more experiences for the helping professions community, so I think since the pandemic we’ve run just almost about 3,000 events.Wow, that’s a short period of time, for an enormous amount.Yeah, but it took us about the first 10 years to get to maybe, I think we were around 800 events, and then we’ve done, yeah, it’s really exploded, and we do about 700 or 800 events a year now, maybe about 10 to 20 conferences, so yeah, we keep ourselves busy. So although often colleagues are seeing me on the video, I’m just the face of a very very good team.I mean it’s not, obviously, as a director, as a co-founder, you have set the tone for that team, you have like kind of, don’t sell yourself short, but I will ask you, so where can, there’ll be a link in the show notes, but it’s Online Events.co.uk isn’t it, with just one e in the middle.Yes, that’s a really important part, I learnt from experience.Yes, okay, thank you for that. It seemed like a cool idea when we started the company, but I think it’s got a lot of people lost, but yes, Online Events, so you spell it onlinevents.co.uk, but we say Online Events, yeah.And I’ll ask you about your ideal and actual self-care for the different parts of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework. The Feel bit is that regulatory lowercase, like hyphenated self-care, the things we actively do to help ourselves feel better. Sometimes we have the bandwidth for that, other times we don’t, and it can be easier to move into that kind of Love, self-acceptance, but often that’s harder, but that kind of what helps you remember you’re part of the divine, part of nature, you don’t need to do a thing to improve, and then finally the Heal bit is the co-regulation, the collective care, the community, the how you provide, obviously even more than I’d realised, community space for others, and also you’ve mentioned your team, but what else you use to hold yourself, like how you let yourself be held, so in each area the ideal and the actual.If we start with feel and the regulatory, what would be your ideal self-care practices?Definitely movement is helpful for me, so I’m not really a stationary person, so anything that has movement in it is helpful for me, and that’s both physically and psychologically. So of course working at the computer, there can be a lot of stationary times, so definitely having periods in the day where there’s movement, and you can imagine with all those events, and the team to take care of, the day can get really intense.The ideal thing for me is to be up early, get a little bit of work done, get out and get an hour’s walk in, so that it’s grounded with some nature, and then back into work. Something about breaking, getting a little bit done, then doing something to care for myself, and to sustain myself.While I’m walking, I’ll also have a meditation practice that I can listen to while I’m walking as well, so sitting and meditating isn’t easy for me, so if I’m in movement, and also having that kind of psychological and emotional experience while I’m on the move, can really help integrate that for me, it sets me up for the day.Wonderful, what about later in the day? What would be ideal things to fit in?The important thing for me is getting enough sleep, the temptation for me is just to squeeze the sleep time, and then of course it always catches up with me. If you keep overdrawing the bank, getting in a lot of trouble. So finishing work, having a little bit of downtime, and then making sure I’ve got enough time for sleep is really, really important. It sounds like a very basic thing, but that for me really impacts how my day and my week goes.I interviewed Tracey Otsuka, who wrote ADHD for Smartass Women, and she said she used to get by on three or four hours sleep, and then she found out that it has huge health implications. She actually started setting a timer to sound like bells, pretended that she was Cinderella to beat the revenge bedtime procrastination and raced around to get to bed by the time she wanted to, to gamify it. I still have the revenge bedtime procrastination, but even remembering

Sensory Soothers for Trauma and AuDHD this Brigid: Episode 96 of the Feel Better Every Day PodcastDo you want to learn to soothe and support your extra sensitive (whether through trauma/s, AuDHD (autism and ADHD) or anything else) nervous system?The Goddess Brigid (we had a bank holiday yesterday to honour her, as well as her namesake, St Brigid, yesterday) is associated with so many wonderful qualities. Use her inspiration, healing and wisdom energies to protect and work with your sensitive nervous system instead of pushing through.I share some of my personal journey with swimming and sensory challenges, offering practical strategies for finding activities that bring you joy (glimmers) as well as triggering more challenging sensory issues. Navigate sensory triggers with self-compassion and create a self-care practice that honours your AuDHD brain.#brigid#sensorydifferences#sensitivenervoussystem#audhd#traumaCHAPTERS0:00–2:24 Introduction, AuDHD, balance, and nervous system support2:24–3:13 Honouring Brigid and working with an extra-sensitive nervous system3:13–6:03 Swimming as sensory soothing, regulation and coming home to the body6:03–8:16 Glimmers, play, balance and how swimming supports ADHD symptoms8:16–10:23 The Feel part: identifying glimmers, benefits and sensory blocks10:23–12:28 The Love part: self-compassion, adaptation, and working with sensory needs12:28–14:04 The Heal part: community, co-regulation and choosing when togetherness helps14:04–15:50 Closing reflections, encouragement and next episodeFULL TRANSCRIPTI love the balancing elements in terms of ADHD, balance is really helpful in terms of working with the cerebellum part of the brain and that’s really helpful in terms of some of our symptoms.Hi, I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham and you’re listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. You can find out more and access older episodes at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and you can also access loads of free resources and find out more about the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing, the column I write for Platinum every month, other titles I contribute to, my work, loads of free resources I’ve created over the years.I really hope you enjoy this episode and if you haven’t already signed up for my free newsletter, it goes out on a Monday, Míle Buíochas Mondays. Míle Buíochas means a thousand thank yous in Irish, which I’m very slowly learning. It’s polyvagal informed journal prompts to help you each week. There’s the gratitude practice element, figuring out more of what brings you joy on a daily basis, what helps you feel in that ventral vagal state (I call Purr! when I use the rescue cats with the Polyvagal Purrs approach) and I also share some of my own gratitudes, some of the things that have helped me feel more in ventral vagal that week.Some of those will be resources that might benefit you and I also share news about upcoming events, special offers, things like that. The journal prompts also include encouragement to look at what is creating sympathetic survival responses (that Hiss! with the Polyvagal Purrs approach) and potentially the dorsal vagal (Freeze!). It’s really helping you learn to map your own nervous system, get to know yourself and to support yourself and it’s all free. If you haven’t already, you can sign up at selfcarecoaching.net and if you have any questions again, let me know eve at selfcarecoaching.net. I hope you enjoy this episode.Welcome to episode 96 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and this week we’re honouring the Goddess and Saint Brigid. It’s a new bank holiday in Ireland the last few years and Brigid has enormous associations with many, many things but particularly healing, inspiration, wisdom and protection.I thought that for today’s episode we’d look at ways in which you might be inspired to heal and protect your extra-sensitive nervous system and to have that wisdom to stop pushing through and to actually work with what you need.We’re going for sensory soothers. A few weeks ago I shared some of the ways in which I’ve made yoga more accessible to myself. Yoga, breath work and meditation as well as with countless clients and students. I was thinking about it when I was swimming and if you know me at all you probably know that I adore swimming, absolutely love it, but I’m also very averse to many elements of it.Not just the cold getting into the sea but the getting changed, the noise, the hairdryer, hand dryers, any smells if people are spraying things, wet floors and ickiness in general. I struggle with an enormous amount but because I know how much I benefit from being in the water, I do it.If I’m at the sea [or a lake or river] there’s the cold, the unpredictability of it all. There are lots of things and I think I realised I don’t remember swimming at school as a child, I remember I’ve got a picture of me as a small child at infant school, I remember us going at infant school to a local pool like it was half an hour away or something and everyone else in my class could swim and I couldn’t. I remember walking across the bottom of the pool and moving my arms like that saying, “please let me into the big pool” and they wouldn’t because I couldn’t swim.And then I learned and I learned by playing. Playing is such a wonderful way to learn and diving for things, so I realised it’s not just the swimming, it’s all the glimmers I get, all the sensory soothing. I love, at the end, the hot shower then getting cooler and cooler and cooler and where I was younger I’d have turned it into a cold shower. Sometimes I do now but I use it very much as a what do I feel like today and where I normally go, you can adjust the temperature really easily in a way I can’t at home (I don’t dare adjust the temperature at home).In the changing room, I can ignore most of what I find horrific in order to benefit from the jacuzzi jets, the steam room, the being underwater, I adore the sensations, I’m not a runner or anything like that but I love the breathlessness and the getting your heart rate up and the feeling held by the water, feeling immersed and cleansed and reset and especially when I’m in the sea even if it’s just for a minute or less it’s that just coming home to myself.It was the first “resource” I had when I began my trauma recovery work, my personal trauma recovery work, the idea of myself way, way, way out to sea floating. I love the feeling of being held by the ocean or in a swimming pool if there’s enough room, I love floating face down, what me and a friend used to call Disturbing Position.The actor Doris Day was apparently prescribed it for her anxiety but it is about breath control and there’s just something so relaxing for me about being face down. I’ve learned along the way (having been told off by a lifeguard in Sarajevo and various people) if I forget, if I get too relaxed it’s like so I generally move from that into an underwater handstand and I just adore my shoulders are much stronger again but I haven’t done my handstands up against the wall in a while.I don’t want to risk hurting them again until I really feel ready but every time I swim I’ll do at least one underwater handstand and I just love that feeling of being upside down. I love the stretch throughout the body, throughout the abdomen, I love the balancing elements in terms of AuDHD, ADHD, balance is really helpful in terms of working with the cerebellum part of the brain and that’s really helpful in terms of some of our symptoms so these things that innately naturally feel amazing for my body are also helping me with my symptoms.I love the warmth of the steam room, the heat, I love the feeling for my joints. If it’s empty I’ll do a bit of yoga in there and I love the ahhhh just after exerting myself. I love my DIY snorkel training where I’m at the very bottom of the pool doing things that when I was first learning how to do them I never believed my body would be able to. And I started that in my late 40s.There are so many glimmers I associate with swimming, it’s a no-brainer for me anytime I’m down, anytime I need a reset. Anytime I need to feel human again I get into the water.I’m sharing this in hopes that it will encourage you to think of some of the things that you might just have in your week, in your day as something that you know the glimmers make the sensory issues worth it while also having compassion for yourself around the sensory issues.For the Feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework, identify what it is that you enjoy doing, the things that bring you many, many glimmers that help you feel most like yourself and that are good for you, that it might be swimming. It might be something completely different but notice, identify, list things that bring you many, many glimmers and also identify some of the blocks to doing those things.I told you (More Joy, Less Angst: Trauma-informed Yoga for AuDHD: Episode 93 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast) about some of the blocks I find with yoga and meditation and breath work. But I’ve depended on them for decades for pain relief, for my mental health, for so many things. It’s the idea of not doing it, I might adapt my practice, I might change how I approach it but the benefits by far outweigh the sensory issues and it’s the same with swimming for me but by identifying blocks it helps me, like the pool that I’m normally a member at, it’s smaller than most pools, it’s smaller than I would like but it’s really lovely in every other way.And it has sections where it’s adult only times of day where it’s adult only and that is really beneficial for me because I find crowds really hectic and I find noise very hectic. And...

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) can feel debilitating when you’re living with AuDHD (autism and ADHD). In this episode, I share some of my personal journey with RSD - even at age 50! - and introduce some practical tools that help me and which can support you in stopping rejecting yourself.CHAPTERS0:00–2:22 Introduction to RSD and nervous system–informed support2:22–5:23 Why RSD is so excruciating and how self-rejection develops5:23–8:15 Early criticism, negative conditioning, and the ADHD/RSD cycle8:15–11:47 RSD in creativity, work, relationships, and self-worth11:47–13:45 Self-acceptance, self-love, and healing RSD in community13:45–15:58 Expanding life again: stopping self-rejection and finding support15:58–19:40 The Feel Love Heal framework and non-violent communication19:40–24:52 Giraffe and jackal energy: compassion, blame, and nervous system responses24:52–27:54 Fear of rejection, shame, and a very human yoga story27:54–31:55 Integration, encouragement, and closing reflectionsLINKSEpisode 71: Shadow Work with Black Cats and SharksEpisode 72: The “Independent Woman” Trap365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing https://selfcarecoaching.net/book/https://selfcarecoaching.net/2018/12/05/wellbeing-wednesday-advent-gratitude-practice-and-giraffes-and-jackals-for-better-communication-with-yourself-and-others/FULL TRANSCRIPTWelcome to Episode 95 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and it’s part one of on RSD, Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, which is so prevalent with AuDHD and that’s autism and ADHD. And it can feel debilitating.Hi, I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham and you’re listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. You can find out more and access older episodes at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and you can also access loads of free resources and find out more about the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing, the column I write for Platinum every month, other titles I contribute to, my work, loads of free resources I’ve created over the years.I really hope you enjoy this episode and if you haven’t already signed up for my free newsletter, it goes out on a Monday, Míle Buíochas Mondays. Míle buíochas means a thousand thank yous in Irish, which I’m very slowly learning and it’s polyvagal-informed journal prompts to help you each week. There’s the gratitude practice element, figuring out more of what brings you joy on a daily basis, what helps you feel in that ventral vagal (I call Purr!) when I use the rescue cats with the Polyvagal Purrs approach. And I also share some of my own gratitude, some of the things that have helped me feel more in ventral vagal that week. Some of those will be resources that might benefit you and I also share news about upcoming events, special offers, things like that.The journal prompts also include encouragement to look at what is creating sympathetic survival responses (that Hiss! with the Polyvagal Purrs approach) and potentially the dorsal vagal (Freeze!) It’s really helping you learn to map your own nervous system, get to know yourself and get to support yourself and it’s all free. If you haven’t already you can sign up at selfcarecoaching.net and if you have any questions again let me know either in the comments or at selfcarecoaching.netI hope you enjoy this episode. I’m not normally someone who re-records things, my style is quite natural and unpolished and sometimes haphazard, but this is possibly the latest, since I started doing the podcast, that I’ve left it in terms of getting the episodes to my amazing virtual assistant who then sorts transcription and all out for me in terms of getting it all scheduled and ready for going out on Tuesday.But I just woke up this morning thinking what I’d recorded I couldn’t share, I rejected it and that wasn’t my first attempt. It’s really weird. This is part one of a series, an occasional series, I was going to say part two would follow in a couple of weeks but I’m not going to put that pressure on myself.RSD, Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria, Rejection Sensitivity Disorder, it is one of the most debilitating, excruciating elements of being alive with AuDHD, autism and ADHD. And I had no idea what it was until I began exploring ADHD however many years ago now and more so with the autism, with the ADHD medication treating so many of those symptoms.But I’m 50 years old and I’ve spent much of the past nine months or so feeling like a teenager in terms of the RSD. I’m feeling it so, so strong and it always makes me laugh when people have other impressions of me because I know how excruciating life can feel from the inside out and also I’m aware that my bandwidth is lower with various things going on in life.I thought I’d do this episode and I’m going to share some ways in which you can work with your own as well as giving you a bit more understanding around what it is. If you haven’t already come across, you probably have, Alex Partridge’s ADHD Chatterbox podcast, his gorgeous book Now It All Makes Sense has been out for a good while, been recommending that for a good while and he has a new book coming out Why Does Everybody Hate Me? which is specifically about RSD.He’s doing amazing work in this area bringing together different experts and sharing his own experiences and I’m hoping that this, some of my own experiences as well as the ways in which you might choose to work with it will help you because ultimately we can’t control what happens around us but we can stop rejecting ourselves and I think this is where RSD is so enormous for so many of us with neurodivergence, with AuDHD, with autism, with ADHD where our parents potentially were undiagnosed, unknowing and they were projecting parts of themselves out onto Little Us’s and recognising, like I know when I look back, my parents, all the yelling, all the like criticism, they were trying to protect me. I then developed a very strong self-loathing inner critic but I understand they were both immigrants and they were not in the most welcoming part of the world for immigrants although I think it’s worse now.I think they were both undiagnosed, autism and ADHD and they both had their own trauma.I am very very fortunate that I have a lovely relationship with both of them, challenging as well but that I’ve been able to heal so much and I think the Inner Child work I continue to do, the reparenting I continue to do, I think it’s helping them as well.I like to think that because sometimes that’s excruciating as well but I can recognise as a 50 year old that an enormous amount of the criticism and an enormous amount of like me being told everything I did was wrong, like from my London Essex accent, so every time I opened my mouth my speech would be corrected, the way I tied my shoelaces or held my pen or all these things.Additude magazine which is for ADHDers, it’s an American publication, had a study a while ago and it wasn’t a huge study but the number has kind of reverberated around the world that ADHDers typically get 20,000 more negative inputs by the age of 10 than their neurotypical peers.If you think about how we then start to police ourselves and how we then, we might make a mistake, we might do something embarrassing, we might do something ridiculous and in order to try and not be yelled at or criticised or bullied or made fun of or shamed or any of the things that have happened a gazillion times to us, we tear ourselves down. The attempt is to try and protect ourselves from doing it again in the future but of course it just makes it worse.If you haven’t already seen the film Penelope, I recommend you watch it. It stars Christina Ricci, Reece Witherspoon, James McAvoy, Catherine O’Hara and I can’t remember who else, I’ve seen it several times but the message is just glorious and it hugely applies around any kind of rejection, any kind of sensitivity. Being a writer, professional writer since 2004, that has forced me to confront my RSD long before I understood what RSD was. I thought everyone felt like that but you can’t afford to not put yourself out there, your ideas out there, your work out there, no matter how excruciating it may feel if you want to share your work.Same could go for being an entrepreneur and being any kind of creative person.I was single for 23 years because I made some terrible decisions which were bad for me when I was younger and also the more I understand about RSD, it’s like just the excruciatingness of being, attempting to be in relationship when I was so rejecting of myself.And I know that when I began building my business in 2004, a lot of things that I had to overcome and learn and expand into as a business owner, as a freelance writer, as a coach, complimentary therapist, therapist, supervisor, all of it, it all continually comes up for healing and then by the age, by the year 2022, I had the realisation that in spite of all this work I was doing on myself and with clients and with groups and with readers and with audiences, all of it, I believed that I was unlovable and that was why I was single.I thought Yikes! If a client came to me and had recognised that, I would be working with them to help them heal because of course everyone is lovable, my whole business, my whole practice is based around us all like the more we can imagine...

Am delighted to be sharing this interview with the fantabulous Dr Emma Bede. We met online when we were both presenting at Online Events’ Living and Working with Neurodivergence Conference last year and she is SUCH a joy.SIGN UP FOR THE FREE NEWSLETTER AND GET MORE INFORMATION HEREHere are some of my favourite quotes from our conversation:“These are the structures I need to have in place. I think as someone with ADHD, I think if I think of that as like, ‘Come on, you’ve got to do this every day for the rest of your life,’ I just get angry.” ~ Dr Emma Bede“I’m not very good at forming habits. Things don’t become autopilot except for the really unhelpful things. I played Candy Crush once and I’m going to play it every day for the rest of my life. But for the helpful things, I’m never on autopilot, you know, I always need the reminders, the prompts, the visual cues, the apps, the habit trackers. But I’ve been gradually adding more and more things.” ~ Dr Emma Bede“I can’t do all of those things every day, but they go in waves and I’m getting better over time at noticing, oh, I’ve skipped a few days of this actually. And I quite kind of miss it and I want to come back to it. I want to feel how I feel when I do that thing and that might mean that I give up on something else a little bit.” ~ Dr Emma Bede“I’m saying to other people, ‘Well, that’s OK. That’s how your body works. That’s how your brain works. Let’s find a way to go with that. Let’s find a way to go with the rhythm of that.’ And then to walk out of the room and swear at myself for doing the exact same thing? You can only sustain that for so long.” ~ Dr Emma Bede“If you’re holding a screwdriver in your hand and everyone else is holding a spanner, you can sit there for years trying to use it as a spanner and it’s not going to work. But then you go, ‘Do you know what? This is a screwdriver. I cannot do the things that those people can do with their spanners, but screwdrivers can do amazing stuff. I’m going to go do some of those things!’” ~ Dr Emma BedeJOURNAL PROMPTSAs you watch or listen to our interview, ask yourself:· Who can you be that honest with in your life? Advocating for your sensory needs while also loving and accepting them?· How can you be kinder to yourself when you meltdown? What will help you repair? Remember, the reparation allows deeper healing and connection than if you were to somehow magically become the perfect parent/partner/therapist etc.Let me know in the comments or by email – [email protected] grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS0:00–1:54 Self-care without punishment: the paradox of acceptance and change1:54–5:13 Welcome and introductions: Dr Emma Bede5:13–13:02 Ideal vs actual self-care: ACT, gentleness, and finding a rhythm that works with ADHD/autism13:02–20:06 Self-acceptance, perfectionism, and “acceptance permits change” (including the screwdriver metaphor and RSD moment)20:06–28:21 Support systems and boundaries: co-regulation, humour, cats and spotting capacity before meltdown28:21–33:06 Healing your Younger Self: reassurance, being more of you, and not being a “tribute band”33:06–35:35 Where to find Emma, book mention and closing notesLINKSEmma Bede’s website:https://www.willowpsychology.co.uk/https://thefeelbettereverydaypodcastfor all episodes and more informationhttps://selfcarecoaching.netfor free resources (including Míle Buíochas Mondays), more information and to book a free telephone consultation for potential clients and supervisees (and for media enquiries or booking me for events).#AcceptanceAndCommitmentTherapy#selfcareforAuDHD#selfcareforADHD#selfcareforautism#dremmabede#newpodcastepisodeFULL TRANSCRIPTThat paradox between that second, the Love [part of your framework] of “You’re perfect as you are, you’re wonderful.” And also, “Right, what are you going to do today? How are you going to make today better? How are you going to fix yourself?” And to have those two parts alongside each other. But I think it connects to that very first thing you said. It’s not what you’re doing, it’s the attitude with which you’re doing it.And to situate all this kind of self-care, not in a kind of punitive, come on, you’re malfunctioning, you’re not quite as good as other people. And if I just whip you hard enough, you might just about be up to scratch. Yeah.But all that self-care, including the difficult stuff and the self-regulatory stuff and the boring stuff to come from that position of it’s because you’re wonderful and you’re lovely and you’re okay and you deserve to be here. It’s because of that that I actually think you should probably get a good night’s sleep. Yeah.Welcome, Emma. Thank you so much for joining me. I met Dr. Emma Bede when we were both presenting at the Online Events Neurodivergence Conference last October.And I so loved what you were saying, and the compassionate approach you had to your own needs with neurodivergence and trying to be loving towards, in the case I’m remembering, someone you were eating with, but the communication that, like, I know you do so much amazing work.Can you tell people where they might find you and what you’re working on at the moment?Yes, I absolutely can. And also, the feeling is mutual because I came to your presentation at the conference and used cats as a medium of explaining Polyvagal Theory, which I’ve never managed to grasp until someone put some cats in front of me and suddenly everything made sense, because that’s language I understand.You’ve made my day.Yes, so I do a mixture of different kinds of work. I’m a therapist, first and foremost. I work with neurodivergent neurotypical people. I do autism and ADHD assessments and kind of post-diagnostic support, but also support for people who don’t want to or aren’t currently ready to or choose not to, for whatever reason, go through a formal process before or after. And I do quite a lot of workshops and presentations and so on.And I’ve just, I’ve got a book manuscript deadline in a couple of weeks, which is exciting as well. Yes, I’ll look like that after I’ve handed it in. But right now, I don’t quite look like that.But yes, so I don’t do very well on social media because I’m not very good at being consistently doing the same thing every day. So I’m mainly at my website, which is willowpsychology.co.uk. And I do quite a lot through Online Events. I do quite a lot of teaching and workshops through there, but I try and post everything on the website.In theory, I have a newsletter and people have signed up to it and I haven’t yet put an edition out. So if people sign up to a newsletter, if enough people sign up to it, I will have to actually write it at some point. So that’s also part of the plan.So you could say quality, not quantity.Yes. Led by the muse who shows up sometimes 30 times in one day and sometimes not for a month. So yes, it’s rather like that. Yeah. Wow.Well, good luck with the book manuscript. I’ll definitely, I’ll add it to the show notes when it’s available. When it’s available to pre-order as well. I would love you to say a little bit about your ideal self-care and your actual self-care, particularly around neurodivergence trauma.And I’ve briefly explained my framework where the Feel bit, Feel. Love. Heal, the Feel bit because in different moments, let alone different days, we have different bandwidths. We need different things.The same activity or the same approach one day could be pure self-care. The next day it could be punitive. So, the Feel bit is that kind of lowercase hyphenated self-care, the regulatory, the things we can do to help ourselves feel better.The Love bit is the kind of Love archetype in psychosynthesis, the acceptance, the there’s no need to change a thing. You’re part of nature, part of the divine already whole. And I’m aware this year it feels like there’s more people saying that around New Year, New You, forget that you’re already wonderful. But we also know when we accept ourselves, when we’re compassionate to ourselves, any kind of change we do want to make, it becomes much easier because we’re not in the Stress Response. That’s the love part. And then the Heal part is the co-regulation, the collective care.I hope I’m not overwhelming you with all of this and continue to ask questions as needed. But what would you say would be your ideal self-care in terms of things you do to help yourself feel better?And just to pick up on the way you frame that, I think one of the therapies I use quite a lot is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). I find it’s a good fit for me personally and also for a lot of neurodivergent people who maybe haven’t got on with other well-known therapies.That paradox between that second, the Love [part of your framework] of “You’re perfect as you are, you’re wonderful.” And also, “Right, what are you going to do today? How are you going to make today better? How are you going to fix yourself?” And to have those two parts alongside each other. But I think it connects to that very first thing you said. It’s not what you’re doing, it’s the attitude with which you’re doing it.It’s the attitude with which you’re doing it. And to situate all this kind of...

GET YOUR FREE POLYVAGAL-INFORMED JOURNAL PROMPTS HEREIf it hadn’t been for the immediate pain relief from the endometriosis, I’d have run a gazillion miles in the opposite direction from yoga, breathwork and meditation. Back in 2001, I didn’t understand about the impact my trauma history had on my capacity to feel safe around other humans, let alone my differently wired brain and extra sensitive nervous system.I’d adore elements (was getting up for 6.30am classes in London at one point) but be full of angst – which I blamed myself for – around many other seemingly inevitable parts of every class (e.g. other people’s feet waaaay too close to my face when I struggled with even my own feet being so close).In this episode, I share some of my yoga glimmers as well as triggers and ideas – using the Feel. Love. Heal. framework – to help you give yourself the chance to experience calm and ease as you build strength, resilience, flexibility, focus, stamina, balance and reconnect with the peace and joy that are your birthright.JOURNAL PROMPTSAs you watch or listen to this episode, ask yourself:What do I hate about yoga, meditation and breathwork?Might there be ways around it?To get the benefits without wanting to run a gazillion miles in the opposite direction?What do I LOVE about them? In the moment? For minutes, hours and even days afterwards?What will you do differently (with your self-talk and communicating your needs and wants to others) as a result of watching or listening to this episode?Let me know in the comments or by email – [email protected] if you’re feeling sad reading this because you can’t think of anything that supportive, let it be a cue to encourage you to be open to more of it in 2026 and beyond.LINKSMoving into 2026 with Roxy Romaniuk: https://youtu.be/3fZVHL_4wzkCommunity as Self Care (with Elizabeth Potts): https://youtu.be/ukjngIR6U_wBook bonus videos: https://selfcarecoaching.net/book/Míle Buíochas Mondays: https://feelbettereveryday.kit.com/f7f730d651Trauma-informed and neuro-affirming yoga, breathwork and meditation: https://selfcarecoaching.net/services/yoga-and-meditation/Endometriosis:https://selfcarecoaching.net/?s=endometriosisCHAPTERS0:00–4:12 Introduction and recognising the benefits of yoga, breathwork, and meditation4:12–8:43 Trauma-informed and neuro-affirming approaches and adapting practice to your needs8:43–11:34 Sensory considerations, self-advocacy and embracing self-love11:34–15:34 Community, co-regulation and giving yourself permission to experiment15:34–20:16 Resources, support and moving further into 2026FULL TRANSCRIPTDo you like the idea of yoga, breathwork, meditation, but think that with your trauma history, hypervigilance, AuDHD (that’s autism and ADHD) brain, you simply can’t?This episode will share some of the things that I use with clients and students, as well as the things that have helped yoga, breathwork and meditation really become a way which I come home to myself, rather than a way in which it often felt quite torturous.Welcome to Episode 93 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I’m your host and producer, Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m an author, columnist, trauma therapist, self-care coach, and senior accredited supervisor specialising in AuDHD, ADHD-friendly, trauma-informed and neuro-affirming and transpersonal and somatic approaches.I help people through self-care practices that honour how your brain and nervous system work, as well as your Self with that uppercase S, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant, miraculous part of yourself. With new episodes each Tuesday, you can subscribe or follow to make it less likely that you’ll miss new episodes.And if you’re new here, do check out older episodes, access free deeper dives and more resources and information at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.comThank you for listening. I hope you enjoy this episode.I am recording this after I recorded the rest of the episode because I realised that I had focused so much on the challenges when you have a trauma history, when you have that hypervigilance, if you have autism or ADHD, AuDHD, and I missed the GLIMMERS and what keeps me going back.And especially with Roxy’s episode last week (Episode 92). This morning, we’d been snowed in yesterday and I had to cancel attending a class. And this morning I was expecting ice. So I hadn’t had my hopes too high up, which meant I hadn’t psyched myself up as much as I normally do for an early start.I was like, when it wasn’t all icy, it was like, “Oh, so I can go, but I’m so cold and I’m so cosy and I don’t want to get up and I maybe I don’t like yoga and maybe I’ll just go back to sleep and maybe…”And I had a word with myself gently and I went. And I again, when I say I almost weep sometimes in class, like no one would see, but it just feels like my whole body is saying THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.And I think that’s the other side of sensory issues that we often don’t talk about.We talk about the distress. We talk about when it’s triggering. We talk about when people feel too close to intrusive. Where there are like smells or any kind of senses being overly stimulated. But of course, we need stimulation and we benefit from stimulation and the movement, the joy of feeling the joints and the muscles and the blood and just the heart lightening and the mind calming and the soul connecting.I really wanted to add this little bit to today’s episode because it’s the mental health, the emotional health, the physiological and the spiritual benefits that keep me going back and that keep me practising at home in between classes.But I’m really finding that attending classes is so, so worth it if you can manage it.So Happy New Year! It’s really important that if meditation, breathwork and yoga appeal to you, that you know that there are trauma-informed ways of working, there are neuro-affirming ways of working.It can be an accessibility issue. And I know I’ve said before in other episodes, I only stuck with it because it was such good pain relief with the chronic pain condition I had for so many decades. I really want to save other people the pain.We’ll be talking more about rejection sensitivity dysphoria in a couple of weeks. But throughout my training, throughout almost every class I attended, I’d always have such a huge inner voice telling me I was doing it wrong.Often, instructors would be really kind of didactic in terms of not fidgeting and taking your socks off when I had sensory issues around any of that. I’m hoping that listening to today’s episode or watching will help you give yourself permission to do what’s appropriate for you. Maybe talk to instructors in advance.Whether you’re doing a home practice or going to a class, knowing that yoga, breathwork and meditation is for everybody and every mind. It can be transformative when you own your sensory issues and you own other aspects, your hypervigilance, other things that have stopped you getting onto the mat, feeling like you’re too much and you can’t do it.You absolutely can. But as with so much around self-compassion, first of all, we’re going to work through the Feel. Love. Heal. framework again, but recognising that it’s not about overriding sensory issues or other ADHD or autism traits.It’s about recognising them purely as information. It’s another opportunity to be mindful, to work with yourself rather than arguing with reality and wishing that you move through life differently. It’s about body work that we do for ourselves. It can be so beneficial in so many different ways.I’ve spoken about yoga nidra and the research showing that it increases dopamine by up to 65% (for this and more visit selfcarecoaching.net/yoga). No side effects. It’s just a gorgeous deep rest, non-sleep. You can do it in as little as 10 minutes. You can take longer practices and choose voices that appeal and choose whether you want music or not music in the background. There are so many options.And similarly, there are so many different types of yoga classes. There are so many that you can do online videos, you can attend a local studio, you can try different studios, different classes within the same studio. With breathwork, there’s going to be somewhere it’s much more tailored to the individual, others where they’re trying, like, or you feel that they’re trying to make you conform to another way of breathing.There’s so much we criticise about ourselves on a day-to-day basis. We really want any kind of self-care practices to be nourishing and supportive and affirming. And so, as we move into the Feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework, I want you to think about some of the obstacles.When you think about yoga, breathwork, meditation, make a list. All the things that get in the way of you going or enjoying those practices, if it appeals. If this does not appeal, I don’t imagine you’re listening this far into the episode.Is it something that could be solved by wearing socks, by talking to an...

Happy New Year! And welcome to Season 3 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast!As we move into 2026, am delighted to share my (Eve Menezes Cunningham, author, podcast host, columnist, trauma-informed and neuro-affirming therapist, Self care coach and senior accredited supervisor – https://selfcarecoaching.net has more information) interview with yoga teacher, Roxy Romaniuk.I adore her yoga classes and really loved our conversation and her honesty about moving through difficult feelings, emotions and situations by paying attention and moving them through her body with movement and journalling.I know yoga students and groups have often called me serene (and that I so often feel anything but!) AND while I don’t know how Roxy feels on the inside while she’s teaching, I do know that she wouldn’t embody such serenity as a yoga teacher if she wasn’t doing all this inner work.Nothing’s good or bad. Everything is simply information. But we all need support (compassion for ourselves as we face challenges, the courage to ask for help and support and community around us to offer it when we can’t ask).JOURNAL PROMPTSAs you watch or listen to our interview, ask yourself: How might you make more space to process, reflect and work with ALL the feelings in 2026? How and where might you access support and that essential feeling of being held we all need in order to co-regulate and thrive? Maybe there’s a yoga class local to you where you feel able to exhale deeply and let go? Maybe a great friend or loved one you don’t have to mask around? A therapist or coach? Some other kind of relationship?Let me know in the comments or by email – [email protected] if you’re feeling sad reading this because you can’t think of anything that supportive, let it be a cue to encourage you to be open to more of it in 2026 and beyond.THE SOLE TO SOUL CIRCLE IS EVOLVINGWhereas before, the deeper dive exclusive content would go out on Wednesdays, this will now be an additional bonus for my Míle Buíochas Mondays newsletter subscribers (as well as the regular polyvagal-informed journal prompts and some of the things I’m most grateful for and delighted to share with you). If you’re not already a subscriber, you can sign up for free at https://feelbettereveryday.kit.com/f7f730d651And I’ll share more about the evolving Sole to Soul Circle soon.Happy New Year!Le grá (with love),[email protected] – check out their upcoming open weekend with free classesCHAPTERS(0:03) Difficulty expressing “negative” emotions(2:07) Introducing guest Roxolana Romaniuk(3:47) Ideal vs actual self-care through my Feel. Love. Heal. framework(6:00) Small daily rituals and intuitive movement(8:13) Expressing anger and difficult emotions safely(12:21) Community, belonging, and collective careFULL TRANSCRIPTDo you struggle to express yourself when you’re feeling really sad or angry or hurt or any of the so-called negative emotions?Today’s guest is an absolute delight and while she’s one of my favourite yoga teachers, I especially love what she shares about her own self-care in terms of giving space, making space for messy movement and expression.I hope you love listening to her as much as I enjoyed talking to her and I’d also love to hear from you in terms of maybe the emotion you struggle most to process and what you’re going to do differently, what you’re going to try as a result of today’s episode.Welcome to episode 92 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and I look forward to hearing from you.I’m your host and producer Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m an author, columnist, trauma therapist, self-care coach and senior accredited supervisor specialising in ADHD and AuDHD friendly trauma-informed neuro-affirming and transpersonal and somatic approaches. I help people heal through self-care practices that honour your body and your brain and your nervous system as well as yourself, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself.With new episodes every Tuesday you can either subscribe or follow to make it less likely that you’ll miss new episodes but you might also enjoy some of the older episodes and access deeper dives with the Sole to Soul Circle, access free resources and more information at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com.Welcome Roxolana Romaniuk. Thank you so much for joining me.Thank you. I’m so happy to be here. Thank you, Eve.Roxy is one of my favourite yoga teachers at The Yoga Root and when I joined, I think it was in August, September, I changed my schedule to enable me to attend her Monday morning classes and it’s just such a gorgeous start to the week.It was like a gift to myself to really and just like I really appreciate that every week. So where can people find you? What are you working on at the moment?Sorry, I was so happy to hear all of this and I think my face is red now. Yeah, so I’m working in Yoga Root now and that’s where people can find me. Yeah, I’m planning to do my YouTube channel with short practice to make it accessible for everyone but at the moment I don’t have any progress on it so maybe in future this channel will be named Yoga with Roxy but at the moment. OK, and what about on Insta or anywhere else you want? Oh yeah, my Insta is @yogawithroxy but I anyway not posted that much so the place where you really can find me it’s theyogaroot.org. So that’s theyogaroot.orgI talk to everyone about ideal and actual self-care because we all struggle with it. We all know what we wish we could do every day and then the reality hits and something has to give. So I go through my Feel. Love. Heal framework.The Feel bit is like the regulatory self-care: It might be breath practices, it could be going for a swim, it’s something you need a bit of, you have to do something, you’re changing the way you’re, you might be working with the way you’re sending those signals of safety or confidence or whatever come but it’s something you’re doing to help regulate, help yourself feel better.Then the Love bit is the more kind of accepting, recognising you don’t have to do a thing, you’re perfect just the way you are, you’re part of nature, part of the divine but also that can be more challenging. I know that’s the part I find most challenging, I’d always rather be doing rather than accepting myself how I am.And then the Heal bit is the collective care where it might be about community and it’s where you, as well as you’re holding space for others obviously with your work, but where you receive that for yourself.And it might be that you’re not at the moment but in each category I kind of ask about your ideal and the reality. So if you’re happy to say, what would be your ideal in terms of that kind of lowercase self-care, the regulatory, the Feel better?Yeah. So my ideal, which has never happened, but it’s I’m waking up at 6am and I’m just seeing how the sun is rising, doing my yoga outside, doing some journalling and planning my day and decide how would I like to live that day.But my actual routine is I find that it’s important to have at least one small thing which you will repeat every day like day by day. So my small things which I do every day if I’m sick or like I can do this every day actually it’s just a glass of hot water. Yeah I’ve got a mug of hot water here now.Yeah same. So that’s how my body understands I’m waking up and it helps my body waking up, my mind and also I’m doing like some it might be not something that some movements that I repeat but what I do. Just moving somehow. Like sometimes I’m playing the music and just allow myself to move however I feel to move right now. Like yeah.That’s fantastic and what about the I always start by introducing it is when you don’t have the bandwidth to do something that kind of that accepting yourself where you are that kind of recognition that you don’t have to do a thing you’re part of the divine you’re part of nature and I also realise that can be so much harder especially for people with AuDHD.What helps you or what would be your ideal in terms of connecting with that highest wisest truest part of yourself? Yeah so in this part I think meditation is helping me a lot to feel that I’m enough that everything is all right. Yeah, I can’t control everything what happens around me in the world but in meditation I can feel like the connection with something bigger and the feelings that I am enough and I also find that it’s important to see where you are to understand what you feel right now and try to express it somehow and I just creating some space in my house and just playing music and allow myself moving like horrible like strange like I don’t know no one can see me and I can be like how I feel now and at least have one place in the world when I can be anger when I can be like anyone.Have you come across five rhythms?I’m not sure.So Gabrielle Roth she died but for decades she basically it would be a playlist and I did some when I was doing my psychosynthesis training and I was so disembodied back then and I was like I can’t dance sober everyone else was sober as well but I was like oh yeah but it would be like songs music that would deliberately provoke the kind of anger or sadness or grief or joy or I can’t remember the five specific rhythms but I remember anger was one of them and I think what you’re describing is absolutely gorgeous because you’re accepting how you’re feeling and you’re allowing it to move through you rather than suppressing it or telling yourself I should be feeling.Yeah yeah yeah yeah

Happy New Year!Do you love New Year’s Eve? Do you hate New Year’s Eve? Do you feel indifferent to New Year’s Eve?However you feel, I hope you have a wonderful New Year! Watch or listen to episode 91 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast wherever you get your podcasts for some of the self-care rituals and practices that I do every year or most years.I hope they’ll help you work with your own ADHD brain, AuDHD brain, and also to continue to heal from any trauma. Use this time of year, where there is so much external pressure in terms of how you might be thinking you should be celebrating or what you should be doing to go for it with all that appeals and ignore all the rest![Link to selfcarecoaching.net/blog for show notes, full transcript and more]le grá (with love),EveLINKSSign up for Míle Buíochas Mondays (Polyvagal-informed and more every Monday) hereWestport Lunar CirclesYour vibe for 2025: Episode 38 of The Feel Better Every Day PodcastChoose your transpersonal quality for the year aheadHappy New Year and bring what was good about the break into your year aheadMake the most of the seasonal energiesCHAPTERS0:00 – Mixed feelings about New Year’s Eve?2:28 – Checking in with what actually appeals4:53 – New Year intentions and PDA-friendly resolutions6:01 – Lessons, blessings and reflecting on the year8:18 – Choosing a guiding word or theme for the year ahead10:26 – Clearing space and symbolic release rituals12:02 – Self-acceptance instead of self-improvement13:39 – Community, connection and designing New Year’s Day16:12 – Creative visioning and sensory mood-settingFULL TRANSCRIPTDo you love New Year’s Eve? Do you hate New Year’s Eve? Do you feel indifferent to New Year’s Eve?However you feel, I hope you have a wonderful New Year and in this episode, episode 91 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, I’m going to be sharing some of the self-care rituals and practices that I do every year or most years in order to help you work with your own ADHD brain, AuDHD brain, and also to continue to heal from any trauma and just to really use this time of year where there is so much external pressure in terms of how you might be thinking you should be celebrating or what you should be doing and they’re very tentative invitations in terms of if anything appeals, go for it and ignore all the rest.I’m your host and producer, Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m an author, columnist, trauma therapist, self-care coach and senior accredited supervisor specialising in ADHD and ADHD friendly trauma-informed, neuro-affirming, transpersonal and somatic approaches.I help people heal through self-care practices that honour your body and your brain and your nervous system as well as your Self, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself.With new episodes every Tuesday, you can either subscribe or follow to make it less likely that you’ll miss new episodes and if you’re new here, even if it’s nowhere near New Year’s, when you’re listening to this, you might still enjoy this episode. It can be great for a fresh start at any time of the year.The PDA, “Don’t tell me when to celebrate New Year! I can redesign my life anytime I choose!” but you might also enjoy some of the older episodes and access deeper dives with the Sole to Soul Circle, access free resources and more information at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.comAs you listen to today’s episode or watch today’s episode, ask yourself what appeals. Just check in with yourself.Notice how you feel. Do any of the ideas make your heart sing? Do any of them feel really heavy, too much pressure? You don’t have to do anything. You can completely ignore the New Year!It is just another day and it can be a wonderful time to reset, to remind ourselves of all the choices we have in terms of doing things differently. As always, it’s aimed especially for trauma survivors and people with ADHD or AuDHD brains and I’ll be going through the Feel. Love. Heal. framework that I developed in order to share these ideas.We have different levels of bandwidth at different times and (have I forgotten to record? Nope, I haven’t forgotten to record, I had forgotten that it’s not a touchscreen screen) with different levels of bandwidth, sometimes we might be very able to do the things that we know are going to help us feel better, the Feel part.It might be reaching out to someone. It might be some form of movement. It might be anything at all that helps you regulate, that kind of lowercase self-care.Other times you just have to accept where you are because bandwidth is too low. Other times that Love part, the acceptance, the support, the self-love, it can feel more challenging than the Feel part.It can be harder to accept ourselves exactly as we are, to love ourselves exactly as we are. In those cases, the more regulatory things can be easier.And the Heal part, the more collective self-care, the co-regulation. Whether that’s you offering space, holding space for others and, just as important is you accepting the space that others hold for you, finding spaces where others can hold you because you deserve holding and that might be something that you want to build more into your life.Perhaps you’re very much about giving and you find it harder to receive? As we move into the Feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework this week, we’re looking initially around any PDA you may feel around New Year’s resolutions.That Pathological Demand Avoidance (or Persistent Drive for Autonomy! Because let’s face it, if you are neurodivergent and if you were conditioned out of knowing what you knew was right for you from even potentially pre-verbal, it would have manifested as Pathological Demand Avoidance and doing the opposite of what people wanted you to do but it’s that part of you that can’t be tamed. And honouring that, recognising you can do Resolutions your way.) You don’t have to do them at all but you might want to think about something that is going to help you live a life that is more fulfilling, more meaningful, more joyful and that enables you to thrive.Be curious around that. You might want to do something I do each year again in terms of making a note of the Lessons and Blessings from 2025.Lessons might have been really painful things that occurred, things that you survived, things that you might still be dealing with, challenges that you’re still facing. Being open to what might be trying to emerge at a soul level with even the most challenging of situations, whether that’s around setting boundaries or asking for help or whatever it might be, if you’re able to think in those terms, it’s not going to make the challenges go away but it can make it a bit easier to bear. Just asking how you can learn from each problem, how it might be trying to help you. And I realise that it’s one of those really frustrating things to hear and it can be very helpful to reframe things that we struggle with in this way.With Blessings, again, it might be that with hindsight you see some of the challenges turned into Blessings or it might be things that were utterly joyful and you can immediately, but it can just be a lovely way to connect.I have the Míle Buíochas Mondays newsletter which helps you create and sustain a gratitude practice that hopefully honours your whole Self, your whole nervous system. It’s not all about love and light. It’s also acknowledging the times not only when you’re in ventral vagal, when you’re in Purr!, when life is good, when you feel connected, when you feel safe, when you feel happy. But it’s also about the things that move you out of that into sympathetic survival, into that Hiss! or even dorsal vagal, that Freeze!You might want to sign up for that if you haven’t already and you can just ask yourself now, how does it feel to think back over the year? It might be that you take one month at a time, a Lesson and a Blessing for each month.Or just write or – for some embodied journalling – record yourself talking or as a video or even just talking at your reflection. Just ask yourself what have you learned, what have been the themes? Ask your Self.And there’ll be a link in the show notes to your transpersonal quality for the year in previous years or as you think about the year ahead. It may have already occurred to you and I often begin thinking about this before my birthday in November. Next year (and I’m recording this in 2025) Freedom has stood out for me.In previous years, it’s been like for 2025 it was Harvest, for 2024 it was Pleasure, for 2023 it was Ease. I’ve had Joy, I’ve had Love,...

With ADHD, with AuDHD, with trauma, our nervous systems can really struggle with rest. It can feel unsafe to rest.Why do I share how hard I find rest this while extoling the virtues of rest? Because it’s STILL an advanced practice for me. The whole point of this podcast is to show the gap, sometimes gulf, between what we – as self-care and Self care professionals – want to be doing and are actually doing. Especially with trauma histories and the hypervigilance that comes with having needed to survive. And AuDHD and ADHD where endless cycles of burnout eventually teach us how to honour our sensitive nervous systems.It doesn’t have to take you the decades it’s taken me!Everyone (and I’ve interviewed neuroscientists, other therapists, somatic therapists, energy workers and coaches, nutritional therapists, choreographers, artists and more) knows what would help us. We just need to give ourselves permission to make the necessary changes. For me, that’s constantly taking more and more off my plate and becoming more strategic (and actually getting MORE done while feeling better about it all!) by paying closer attention to my own nervous system and energies.I hope that you’ll gift yourself some extra breathing space over the holidays. Begin to ponder ways in which you can build in sustainable changes for a more restful, easier, more peaceful and joyful 2026.I’ve shared loads of resources to support you (and myself!) over the decades and you can access some here (including some research on rest) as well as listening to Tracy Otsuka (am imagining that the 43% of ADHDers with excellent mental health are better at prioritising rest. I know my mental health has improved along with my capacity for more rest), Caroline Shole Arewu and others share some of their tools to support prioritising rest.Enjoy the episode and let me know what you’re going to do to rest more today, this week, this month and in the New Year!le grá (with love),EveCHAPTERS0:00 – Why rest feels so difficult2:55 – AuDHD, ADHD, trauma and nervous system safety4:02 – Different ways of resting5:27 – Productivity, pressure and burnout8:25 – Rest, holidays and emotional release11:37 – When rest feels unsafe to the nervous system13:59 – Learning to love a sensitive nervous system16:24 – Collective care, boundaries and co-regulationFULL TRANSCRIPTDo you struggle to take time to rest, to give yourself a break, to take things off your plate? It can be especially challenging with trauma histories, with AuDHD (autism and ADHD) with ADHD.It’s especially important to pay attention to your nervous system and make sure that you are getting enough rest, because we’re mammals, just like my little role model here, Meadbh.Cats don’t feel guilty about all the snoozes, all the rest, it enables them to play harder, to climb, to do other things, but we humans, we are in a world which doesn’t encourage rest. It encourages us to think we need all sorts of things we don’t necessarily need.Welcome to Episode 90 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.I’ve talked and written about rest a lot and there’ll be links in the show notes to some of those blogs and episodes, but I’m hoping you’re going to leave this episode with a renewed commitment to your own renewal and yet rest over this festive period, as well as some neuro-affirming and trauma-informed ideas to help you rest your way, to help you let yourself rest your way.I’m your host and producer, Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m an author, columnist, trauma therapist, self-care coach, and senior accredited supervisor specialising in AuDHD and ADHD-friendly, trauma-informed, neuro-affirming, and transpersonal and somatic approaches.I help people heal through self-care practices that honour how your brain and nervous system work, as well as yourself, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant, and miraculous part of yourself.There are new episodes every Tuesday and you can subscribe or follow to make it less likely that you’ll miss any new episodes.If you’re new here, you might want to check out older episodes, access deeper dives and free resources and more information at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.comAs you listen to today’s episode, ask yourself how might you build more rest into your day-to-day, into this week, into if you’re listening to it as it’s coming out this holiday season, or whenever it is that you’re listening to it in the future potentially.Ask yourself what gets in the way of you giving yourself the rest you know you deserve at some level and you know you need. If you need it, it just shows how strong the conditioning is that we deny it to ourselves.With ADHD, with AuDHD, with trauma, our nervous systems can really struggle with rest. It can feel unsafe to rest. This is partly of why I use the cats to demonstrate.So little Meadbh has her claws into me, but cats don’t feel guilty about allowing themselves rest and allowing themselves to find the sun puddle, allowing themselves to find what’s going to feel more comfortable, most comfortable for them in any given moment.And the more we acknowledge and befriend our nervous systems, work with the vagus, recognise what’s going to, like what is the kind of rest that appeals to you. If it feels like going from 100 miles an hour to nought is scary because of course it would be, your nervous system has been so lifted and then all of a sudden you’re expecting yourself to calm right down.For some people it can be researching a new topic or painting or writing or rest comes in lots of different ways. I’ll link to the blog I did about Claudia Hammond’s research and the biggest rest survey that had been done at the time. There are many, many different ways to rest.Ask yourself, How you can give yourself permission to rest YOUR way?As we work with the Feel. Love. Heal. framework this week, the Feel element is that lowercase hyphenated self-care, the regulatory practices, the things we actually do to help ourselves feel better. The Love element is working with the love archetype, that acceptance, that support, that reminder that you don’t need to do a thing to improve yourself. You are part of the divine, you are part of nature, you are already whole, it’s about acceptance. And then we have the Heal element which is around collective self-care and co-regulation. Not just helping your community, your family, the world at large, but accepting help and support from other people. We’re all connected.As we are in the Feel part for this week in terms of rest, it sounds simple but you’re likely to have a lot of resistance towards it because we live in a world where we’re so conditioned to be productive and doing and not being.But I really encourage you, especially at this time of year working with the seasonal energies, look at your diary, look at your calendar, look at whatever planners you use, look at your to-do list, look at the people asking you to do things, demanding things from you and be honest with yourself about what is getting in between you and feeling more rested.Why are you choosing to say yes to things that mean that you’re not getting enough sleep, you’re not getting enough downtime, you’re not getting enough rest?You may want to be yelling at me in frustration: “But I have all these demands, I have all these people who depend on me, I have all these projects, whatever it might be.”You might think it’s completely impossible. And I remember, I think it was two Christmases ago where I was very burnt out and I was sobbing walking down the lane and a neighbour friend basically shook me and said, you need to take some time off over Christmas. And I was like, I can’t, I have to do, do, do, do, do, do.Because at that time I had not realised that I had replaced alcohol with work back in 2001 when I got sober, because it was so uncomfortable for me to be present in my body, in my feelings, even though this is the work I do and I’m much, much better than I used to be.I was still overworking and I hadn’t really acknowledged it until that bout of burnout two years ago. And since then, I recognise the benefits much more so and I actively scheduled time off last Christmas and have done the same, taking more time off this Christmas.That’s after 21 plus years of being my own boss. I am my own boss. I could have done that 21 years ago.I took my first holiday in over nine years. I’m back just over a week at time of recording. And basically, I denied myself a week away, partly because of cat care, but also partly because I felt like I had to be ON. I might forget with my AuDHD brain, which I didn’t know about until a few years ago, I might forget how to do my work. I might forget how to do all the things. If I got out of that routine, I didn’t realise how...

A Polyvagal-informed approach to the seasonal energies for trauma, AuDHD and ADHDFeeling the weight of the darkest days? In this episode of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast,I’m sharing gentle, nervous system-friendly rituals to help you honour the seasonal energies of Yule (Winter Solstice) while healing your trauma and befriending your AuDHD or ADHD brain.Discover how to:✨ Use a Yule log tradition for releasing and renewal✨ Navigate seasonal overwhelm with polyvagal-informed practices✨ Honour both the darkness and the returning light✨ Set intentions that actually feel good for your nervous system✨ Create community connection on your own termsWhether you’re struggling with the season or finding joy in it, this episode welcomes all your feelings and offers practical ways to thrive through winter’s longest night.🔗 Free resources and show notes📖 Get the book: 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing💌 Join the Sole to Soul Circle for deeper dives, exclusive content and instant access to the whole archive🎙️ New episodes every Tuesday – listen on Spotify, Apple or wherever you get your podcasts#WinterSolstice #Yule #TraumaHealing #AuDHD #ADHD #PolyvagalTheory #NervousSystemHealing #SelfCare #NeurodivergentSupportWishing you the coolest of Yules! 🕯️LINKSListen to Purr! Hiss! Freeze! Episode 48 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast wherever you get your podcasts. Watch and read full transcript hereFind out more about how embodied journalling can help you hereCHAPTERS(0:00) Honouring the darkness and welcoming renewal(0:57) Trusting your nervous system and honouring your needs(2:05) Introducing Episode 89(3:38) Yule log ritual(5:38) Embodied journalling and self-acceptance(7:03) Collective care and community intentions(8:39) Free newsletter and polyvagal-informed gratitude practice(10:31) Book, coaching and other resources(11:04) Closing message and thanksFULL TRANSCRIPTHow do you feel about the dark nights and long [I meant SHORTER 😊] days? You may be loving it, you may be feeling a bit hopeless, and this week we’re looking at ways in which you can celebrate your winter solstice here in the Northern Hemisphere by honouring the darkness, the cold, potentially the hopelessness, and also remembering the renewal, the hope, the deep roots growing underground even when it feels like there’s nothing happening on the surface.Trusting your nervous system, giving yourself permission to go to events that feel good for you and avoid potential sensory overload or make up for it by having quiet days after, just really honouring how you feel, whether it’s through trauma, through ADHD, through autism, honouring what you need.With it being the longest night in terms of darkness in this part of the world, it can feel a bit hopeless. If it feels good for you, I encourage you to connect with that, dipping the toe into that dorsal vagal, that Freeze! Only dipping a toe in.We’re focusing on Ventral Vagal (Purr!) the feeling good, the renewal, the hope, the letting go of what no longer serves, and setting intentions around what you want to bring into your life.It can be a wonderful time of year to connect with the worry, the anxiety, the fear, the fear of the darkness, fear of the cold. I’m going to introduce this episode, episode 89 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Thank you for listening.I’m sharing a couple of my favourite rituals for this time of year in this episode, and I’m your host and producer, Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m an author, columnist, trauma therapist, self-care coach, senior accredited supervisor specialising in AuDHD, ADHD-friendly therapies, trauma-informed, neuro-affirming and transpersonal approaches, and I help people heal through somatic self-care practices that honour how your brain and nervous system work, as well as your Self, that uppercase S for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself. With new episodes each Tuesday, you can subscribe or follow to make it less likely that you’ll miss new episodes.And if you’re new here, you may want to check out other episodes, access deeper dives, free resources and more information at the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. As you listen to today’s episode, ask yourself, how are you feeling about Yule? How are you feeling about Christmas? It can be very dark, very cold, very joyful, very light. Welcome all the feelings, as always and just honour however it is you’re feeling.For the feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework this week, you may want to take a Yule log for yourself. So this is a log that I’m going to be burning, and the chocolate cake dessert comes from this ancient tradition where people would carve or write things that they were ready to banish into the flame, and also intentions, letting go of, ready to welcome. I encourage you between now and Yule, the 21st of December, to write you might want to carve.Me, I’m quite impatient. I use normally a permanent marker, sometimes biro. It depends on the log. I don’t have the patience for lots of struggle with it. I want it to be as easy as possible, but it’s really joyful to then burn the log and meditate on what you’re releasing and what you’re welcoming in, that sense of letting go, renewal, thinking about the warmth, the light to come, the joy.And we have a little visit here from Meadbh. So I’m just going to welcome Meadbh to Episode 89/And notice how that feels for you. If you don’t have an open fire, if you don’t have a log, you can write on a piece of paper. You can burn it safely with a candle in somewhere safe outside or safe inside. The intention is around really reflecting on renewal, and in order to renew, we release as well.The more we let go with faith that we are clearing the way for more light, more warmth, more joy, more ease, more healing, more freedom, whatever it is you’re wanting, let yourself ponder, let yourself reflect, let yourself release and welcome.As we move into the Love part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework this week, you might want to grab your journal. You might want to do some embodied journaling and reflect on any pain, any imperfections, any feelings of being at odds with the season.It may be around social awkwardness, it may be around sensory issues, it may be around family dynamics, friendships, anything like that. Journal in a friendly way for yourself, and it might be something that you choose to burn on the 21st with your log or instead of. Do your best to love your whole self, to welcome all of it and know that part of feeling and accepting the pain is shining a light on it.The days are going to begin to get longer again. Sunlight is the best disinfectant, giving yourself that gift of letting yourself feel it all so that it can come up for healing. You’re feeling it at some level anyway, you might as well make it conscious and actually heal it!Obviously if you need more support and find yourself a good therapist, coach and talk to a loved one, if that’s part of the despair, the darkness, the pain of this type of year, time of year.As we move into the Heal, collective care element of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework, think about either celebrating the community you already have around you, celebrating and honouring ancestors that may have passed or contemporaries that may have passed. Give yourself time, maybe light a candle, remember them and just really being gentle with yourself as you recognise those losses and think about the kind of community you’d like to create. It might be part of your intention setting and giving yourself permission, even if it feels impossible based on your current friendships or relationships.Imagine light, imagine warmth, imagining feeling safe, welcome and loved wherever you go, allowing your nervous system to thrive. Really giving yourself permission to dream big.This week in the Sole to Soul Circle, I’m inviting members to burn the Yule Log with me again.We did it, I think it was last year and I will send an invitation by Zoom for that. You can join the Sole to Soul Circle as a free or as a paid member. Each Wednesday if you join, you’ll receive your deeper dive into each podcast episode and free subscribers get journal prompts and paid members, which is from just 8 euros a month, get exclusive video and audio recordings.You might also like to sign up for my free weekly newsletter, Míle Buíochas Mondays. And each week it’s polyvagal-informed journal prompts really, while I also share some of the things I’m grateful for. I’m supporting you in building a gratitude practice that honours your nervous system by welcoming all the feelings and part of that involves not just the gratitude, but thinking about the things that have...

Do you feel overwhelmed not just by your own intense feelings but by everyone else’s too? This episode will help you honour and appreciate your sensitive nervous system.I (Eve Menezes Cunningham, author, columnist, trauma therapist, senior accredited supervisor, coach, trauma survivor and AuDHDer) share practical strategies for managing hyper empathy which is common with ADHD, autism, AuDHD and trauma histories.I encourage you to create protected silence in your life, from daily meditation to weekly 12-hour mini retreats, explaining why this isn’t indulgent but can be especially helpful for sensitive nervous systems.Using my Feel. Love. Heal. framework, I guide you through:Creating buffer time and space for yourself (Feel)Accepting your sensitivity as a superpower (Love)Building community support for your needs (Heal)Perfect for trauma survivors, AuDHDers, autistic people and ADHDers (and those who identify highly sensitive people or empaths) and anyone who finds themselves absorbing everyone else’s emotions and energy.Le grá (with love),EveResources mentioned:Tracy Otsuka (ADHD for Smart Ass Women) and Episode 86 for our interviewAlice Tew & Carly Radford episodeThe Sole to Soul Circle365 Ways to Feel Better bookTopics: hyper empathy, ADHD, autism, AuDHD, trauma recovery, sensitivity, boundaries, nervous system regulation, self-careChapters(0:00) Overwhelmed by everyone else’s feelings(1:00) Honouring your extra-sensitive nervous system(2:30) When boundaries collapse under sensory overload(3:05) The Feel. Love. Heal. framework and creating space for silence(4:39) When life gets “too peopley”(8:17) Sensitivity as a superpower (when you protect it)(10:33) Healing through community and collective care(12:20) Imagining your future self with stronger boundariesLinksTracy Otsuka: Episode 86Too Sensitive? Too Much? Says Who? Episode 78 with Alice Tew and Carly Radford Shadow Work with Black Cats and Sharks: Episode 71 Be More Cat: Episode 70 Love your inner Smelly Cat this Bealtaine and beyond Episode 56 Cattitude: Purr! Hiss! Freeze! Episode 48 Sole to Soul Circle membership (just €8/month): https://selfcarecoaching.net/sole-to-soul-circle/Book: 365 Ways to Feel Better https://selfcarecoaching.net/book/FULL TRANSCRIPTDo you ever feel overwhelmed not just by your own intense feelings but seemingly everyone else’s feelings?This episode, Episode 88 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, is for you. You can access show notes and everything else via thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com You can subscribe wherever you want to subscribe and you can also access loads of free resources and find out other ways in which we might work together through selfcarecoaching.netEach Tuesday I release new episodes to help you take better care of yourself, that highest, wisest, truest, most miraculous part of yourself, create a life you don’t need to retreat from and help build a world in which everyone feels safe, welcome and able to thrive. And that starts with you.In today’s episode, we’re looking at ways in which, well I’m recommending one particular way in which you can honour that beautiful extra sensitive nervous system of yours and rather than feeling Gaaghh it’s overwhelming, I can’t do anything.You recognise that you need extra care, extra buffer time, extra space that you’re deserving of connecting with your own feelings and I hope that what I’m recommending will help you.With autism, with ADHD, with trauma, with AuADHD, sensory issues like hypervigilance, it’s all very much our day-to-day. And with that in mind, it’s natural that we have become, even if we weren’t born, attuned to other people’s needs and moods and potentially walking on eggshells, just wanting others to be happy, all of that.For some people it goes into hyposensitivity where it’s just too much, shut down, not doing it. and for others it’s hyper, sorry, hyper empathy as opposed to hypo empathy where that feeling, not just your own but everyone else’s, it can feel and be debilitating.It might be you go to a party and you get cornered by someone who you don’t want to be rude to, you learn boundaries, all of this gets much, much easier but boundaries are much easier to set and assert and maintain when we’re in that good place.When we’re feeling bombarded, when there’s that sensory overload where it’s just too much, our defences go down and it can feel like we just want to move away to a cave in the forest in the middle of the earth. It doesn’t have to be like that.Working with the Feel. Love. Feel. framework that I developed, for the Feel part, that’s the lowercase hyphenated self-care, the regulatory, the things you can do to help yourself feel better.It’s really about looking at your schedule and thinking how can you create and protect some space for silence. I’ve talked about my weekly 12-hour mini retreats before and, full disclosure I had a journal to get off to press and I’m, at time of recording going away for my first holiday in over nine years. So manic preparations, trying to get everything prepared and it’s been a few weeks since I’ve managed my own weekly 12-hour mini retreat and I’m feeling it.And I also know that when I get back from the holiday that will be a non-negotiable because it’s so beneficial for me. By having that silence, by having that time each week, I do over Christmas a 24-hour one which is even better but I’ve spoken in previous episodes about this, it just wasn’t sustainable.I’d think to myself, oh on the bank holiday weekends I will do that and then instead I joined a Sub Aqua club and I’ve been going snorkelling around the country which has been really lovely but…Doing less, 12 hours, half of what I thought I needed most of the year, most weeks this year, it’s been amazing. And I know each week when life gets too peopley and don’t get me wrong, I adore people, I love people but I need time to completely connect with myself, to tune in to myself and I need to not feel on call. Loved ones have my landline number, it’s not technically a landline, it’s that VoIP internet but it means I can switch my phone off, no telly, no washing machine, nothing noisy, just ahhh.12 hours might sound like the height of indulgence to you. It might sound like nowhere near enough time, look at your schedule, think about what you need, be honest with yourself and create and protect that kind of space for yourself on a daily or weekly or monthly basis and experiment with it.It’s not all or nothing, this is just about giving yourself space where you withdraw your senses from everyone else and you instead attune to your own. If you’re living with others it obviously complicates things but there are many people where they do kind of their silence in companionship and that can be even more nourishing depending on the relationships and this will be information as well.But it might be that you live with lots of people and you can still take yourself away and have some time to think purely about whatever you want to be thinking about and not be bombarded with other people’s demands or perceived demands because you feel like you can feel what they’re feeling with that hyper empathy.Moving on to the Love part and it’s accepting your sensitivity, it’s reminding yourself that you’re part of nature, you’re part of the Divine and you are created exactly as you ought to be. And the more you honour how you are, the greater the contribution to the world you can make, the more you can enjoy doing the things that help you make those contributions to the world.Denying what you need is not going to help, beating yourself up is not going to help, telling yourself you’re too much, you’re too sensitive, any of that is not going to help.If you haven’t already listened to my episode with Tracy Otsuka, the author of ADHD for Smart Ass Women, links in the show notes, she does loads around helping us remember that we’re not too much.And there’s also the Alice Tew and Carly Radford [Too Much… Apparently] episode and Carly in particular is a sensitivity counsellor. She specialises in working with sensitivity, she’s autistic and both of them absolutely delightful.I really loved recording both of those episodes so there’ll be links in the show notes and check them out and I’m also aware this is my job, this is my work, I spend so many hours every week talking to clients, talking to supervisees, talking to groups, writing, recording and I still have to

Get your free weekly journal prompts and more hereWatch here or listen here or wherever you get your podcastsDance movement psychotherapist Gwen Williams joins me (trauma therapist, AuDHDer, senior accredited supervisor, coach, author and columnist etc, Eve) to discuss how she combines yoga therapy, dance, art, and psychotherapy to help people reconnect with their bodies and heal.Gwen shares her journey from yoga therapy training (while pregnant!) to completing her MA in dance movement psychotherapy, plus her exhibition “Reclaiming the Wild Body.” She offers practical insights on movement practices for ADHD and neurodivergent brains, explaining why gentle, slow practices work best when your mind moves at a million miles an hour.Perfect for anyone interested in somatic healing, trauma recovery, creative therapy, or finding movement practices that actually work for neurodivergent nervous systems.Find Gwen: Website: gwen-williams.com Instagram: @movement_art_therapyTopics covered: ADHD, dance movement psychotherapy, yoga therapy, somatic practices, neurodiversity, creative healing, embodimentle grá (with love),EveChapters(0:00) Introduction to Gwen Williams(0:53) Reconnecting after yoga therapy training 14 years ago(2:09) Gwen’s evolving body-based and creative work(3:57) Reclaiming the Wild Body exhibition(5:12) Neurodiversity, ADHD and creative practice(7:14) Where to find Gwen online(7:48) Exploring Eve’s Feel. Love. Heal. framework (9:22) Gwen’s essential Feel self-care(11:05) Ideal and essential Love Self care(14:49) Designing life around slower somatic practice(16:22) Heal collective care: community, dance and co-regulation(18:03) Reclaiming the Wild Body workshops(19:20) Earth body, social body and transpersonal body(21:02) Vegan chat and episode planning(22:57) Where to find Gwen (recap)(23:23) Closing credits and resourcesFULL TRANSCRIPTWelcome to episode 87 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Today’s guest is the delightful Gwen Williams. We trained together as yoga therapists for mental health and it was so lovely to catch up with her for this episode and reconnect.She’s since become a psychotherapist and she is combining art and her psychotherapy and yoga and movement and just all around delightfulness. If you’re in Bristol check her out and online obviously also you can gain a lot from her amazing presence in the world. I hope you enjoy the episode and let me know how you get on.Welcome Gwen, thank you so much for joining me. Thank you for having me Eve, it’s really nice to be here. It’s so funny because I met you like we used to sit together a lot in the yoga therapy training we did with the Minded Institute and you were pregnant at the time and you like I couldn’t believe that I was struggling because it was a lot.It was amazing but it was a lot and there you were and now finding out how old your son your first son is it’s like wow like you say it’s a huge mark of time but yeah it’s gorgeous seeing what you’ve been doing with the work and how it’s evolved for you and it looks so beautiful in the video. Do you want to say a little bit more about how it has evolved for you, where people can find you?Yeah thank you, yeah so it’s lovely to reconnect with you and yeah it was it was about it was like 13 or 14 years ago that we were doing that training together. So yeah so that training in yoga therapy with the Minded Institute, yeah so I suppose that’s been part of an ongoing process for me of exploring, training, sharing different body and movement based work.So after that I did some training in Focusing so we’re kind of bodied, lovely, gorgeous, embodied, practised and in women’s health and then in dance I trained as a dance movement psychotherapist so I did an MA in that which I completed about a year and a bit ago.Congratulations.Yeah thank you and that was a very big big chunky training to do so all these things I kind of bring together now in a way of working with people that’s very much focused on the body, focused on movement, focused on the somatic experience of our body, of what’s happening for us in movement and in response to our lives and our emotions and what’s going on in the world.And I also have been yeah reclaiming my own creative practice because my background years ago was in fine arts and then in cultural and media studies so lots of the work I’ve been doing that was part of my MA and then going forward has been working with creative practice through I suppose what you could broadly call performance art or movement and film based work.And you had an exhibition? I had an exhibition yes I had so I had an exhibition in January in central Bristol in an amazing gallery called Centre Space Gallery which is a gorgeous place and that was an exhibition that showcased this body of art space research that I’d done I’d been exploring for probably about seven years in different forms and then it became the focus of my final year of my master’s in dance movement psychotherapy where I got to do this piece of art space research which was called Reclaiming the Wild Body and that was heuristic.It was sort of very much my exploration my own process in this and then I felt like OK I’ve got to bring this work out into a public space so had this exhibition which was an amazing experience and then as part of that had a movement lab with an amazing multi-instrumentalist so we brought other people in I brought other people into it and we explored and now that’s become a piece of workshops that’s happening right now.Multi-talented, multi-passionate and it’s obvious that you’re waiting for an ADHD diagnosis like kind of with hindsight with what we know.Yeah yeah yeah so as I was mentioning I’ve been on the waiting list for about four years for an ADHD diagnosis pretty sure I fit that model and often have multiple threads in different things going on that sort of all link together but often doing lots of things at once yeah yeah some diversity in the picture.And I think that I know for me understanding oh it’s a differently wired brain it really has helped and continues to help me honour that more rather than oh I shouldn’t be or I should be or all of that.Yeah absolutely yeah I think my own process with understanding neurodiversity and knowing I’ve been dyslexic my whole life and going and doing well actually when I did my degree it felt like quite a big deal when I did my Master’s it felt like quite a big deal and yeah shake off some ideas I had about what I was good at. And I actually did really well, amazingly, in my in the writing aspect which was a surprise because sometimes I’m like a thousand million ideas and I want to get all in and it can end up feeling a bit chaotic but wonderful.Yeah it’s been really helpful to kind of understand a bit more about ADHD and be like, OK this is just how I this is kind of the way my brain works and there’s not something wrong with me. No what it is what I do but I think that’s what I think is really helpful in this growing interest in neurodiversity and I ADHD brain I’m not sure if you mentioned your website or website or Instagram I did yeah so my website is gwen-williams.com so you can find on there about my work that I do with groups one-to-ones and a little bit about my creative work and then my Instagram is at movement_art_therapyWonderful yeah and we were talking a bit about how I’ll be asking about your ideal and actual self-care so I work with the Feel. Love. Heal. framework I developed and the Feel bit is the more regulatory lowercase self-care the Love is the the uppercase s Self-care like connecting with your miraculous highest wisest wildest truest self and remembering that we’re all part of the divine remembering that we’re already whole no matter what we’ve survived whatever challenges we’re facing and then the Heal bit is the collective self-care the co-regulation.It might be spaces you hold for others but also very much how you allow yourself to be held and to heal. If I start with the feel what would stand out as an ideal self-care and the essential for you?I love this model. Great. It’s really nice breaking it down into these three parts so I’d say the kind of Feel yeah so the so the kind of yeah as we were saying sort of the I don’t want to call them basic self-care because they can be challenging and different circumstances but for me I guess I’m sort of eating relatively healthy food whilst also not denying myself any particular foods. But healthy foods fairly regularly. Getting hopefully just about enough sleep and having time I’ve got a little pooch who’s just sat here on the sofa next to me so walking out I’m very lucky to live in a city but one where there’s lots of nature around and woods and fields and a river. So being outside for a good part of the day and also just having time with my boys who are now teenage and tween age and maybe even sneaking in some cuddles with them in front of a good tv series we’re all watching and having some walks and time with my family.Wonderful yeah they make a lot of self-care...

Welcome to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast! Today I’m thrilled to share my conversation with Tracy Otsuka, host of the ADHD for Smart Ass Women podcast and author of the book by the same name.Get your free weekly journal prompts and more hereTracy was one of the first voices I discovered on my own ADHD journey, and her strengths-based, neuro-affirming approach has been truly transformative. She’s a former lawyer who boldly celebrates the brilliance often overlooked in ADHD while being refreshingly honest about the challenges.In this episode, we explore:Why ADHD is an identity problem, not just a productivity issueExercise supporting and sometimes replacing medication for managing symptomsThe power of finding your “sweet spot” where executive function challenges disappearRevenge Bedtime Procrastination and the most creative solution I’ve come acrossThe 43% of ADHDers with excellent mental health that nobody talks aboutWhether you’re newly diagnosed, long-time ADH or supporting someone who is, this conversation is full of practical wisdom and hope. Enjoy!Chapters0:00 – Introduction to Tracy Otsuka and her work2:51 – Personal impact of Tracy’s podcast and book4:02 – Finding Tracy and her programmes4:41 – ADHD as an identity problem and building on strengths5:46 – Ideal self-care practices6:19 – Exercise and medication experiences8:13 – Morning routines and dopamine11:26 – Reading, hyperfocus, and slow dopamine12:13 – Gardening, tapping, and somatic practices13:12 – Sleep and managing bedtime resistance (Revenge Bedtime Procrastination)15:20 – Strategies for easier evening routines18:55 – Advice for younger self and understanding ADHD21:07 – Self-expertise and navigating medications23:42 – Following interests and creating meaningful work24:51 – Music, piano, cello, and doing things your way26:25 – Singing, family, and supporting creativity27:29 – How you can find TracyFULL TRANSCRIPTI can’t wait to introduce today’s guest. She’s someone who has helped me enormously on my own ADHD and now AuDHD journey. Hers was one of the first podcasts I found when I started going down that rabbit hole.The very fantabulous Tracey Otsuka, host of the ADHD for Smart Ass Women podcast and author of the book ADHD for Smart Ass Women.Her podcast is really working with the brilliance that is often overlooked with ADHD. She’s very bold, very dynamic, former lawyer, and really confident, honest about the challenges, honest about the disabling aspects, but really it’s probably one of the most strengths-based neuro-affirming approaches I’ve heard.And I just love her guests. She is wanting to draw awareness to the 43% of ADHDers with excellent mental health. So I hope you enjoy our interview.I’m really looking forward to talking to her. And I hope that without any kind of toxic positivity, without any negating of the struggles, you too will be able to own your challenges, know that you deserve support for your challenges and make space for your brilliance. Let me know what you think.Welcome to Episode 85 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday, I share new episodes helping trauma survivors, ADHDers and AuDHDers take better care of yourself, create a life you don’t need to retreat from, and help build a world in which everyone feels safe, welcome, and loved, able to thrive. So literally working with your nervous system, your energy, and it’s a very holistic approach.You can subscribe if you haven’t already, and you’re very welcome to share. I do a lot of free content because I know not everyone can afford one-to-one work. I’ve got another group event coming up, and there’s always the Sole to Soul Circle.But if you check out selfcarecoaching.net, there’s information about the book, more about the podcast, loads of free resources around different areas and conditions. And you can also visit the www.thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com. I hope you enjoy today’s episode, and thank you for listening and watching whatever you’re choosing to do. So welcome, Tracy Otsuka.I can’t believe I’m talking to you because you are such a huge influence on me befriending my own ADHD and now I understand AuDHD brain. This is the first time we’ve spoken, like we’ve just had a brief chat now, but I’ve listened to so many of your episodes, your book, and I recommend it to so many people. I mentioned it in the Irish Journal of Counselling and Psychotherapy, an article I did about late diagnosis, and I love your strengths-based approach.I love that you don’t gloss over the challenges, like you’re human, we’re all human, but even the idea that, is it 43% of ADHD is experienced good mental health?No, no, not good, not good. Excellent. Excellent mental health. And no one ever talks about that. Why have I never heard or read about this other than that one article? Actually, there’s a few articles on that one study.Yeah, I absolutely love it. So I’m so grateful for your work. Where can people find you and what are you working on at the moment?Probably the easiest place that they can find me is on our brand new app called AOK Mind, and you can find it in the App Store or Google Play.Wonderful.And there’s tons of free resources there, so a lot of the trainings that I’ve done over the years are in there.You also have your patented programme. Do you want to mention that?I do have my six-step patented programme. We call it Your ADHD Brain is AOK. I think my camera’s a little crooked. And so I don’t believe that ADHD is a productivity problem. I believe it is an identity problem. We’ve spent our entire life trying to be who they want us to be at the expense of figuring out who we really are. And so the reason why this is so important is if you can build that foundation of what is it exactly that you value? What’s truly important to you? What are the strengths that are just natural born? You can’t help but practice them. You’re practicing them now. What are the talents that you’ve built skills around and turned into superpowers? What of the many passions? Because that is one of our challenges. We have sparkly syndrome where we try this, we try that, we try little bit of this, then we go down here and try more of that. And so it can make us feel like we’re all over the place. And then of course, our purpose. So if you can figure out what that sweet spot is, that is your foundation and do work in that sweet spot.You will have none, if not very, very few of the executive function challenges that you have in most other areas.Yeah, wonderful. And if you were to think, because I know you’re a great proponent of the things that you talk about exercise and the things we can control, even when they might be more challenging, what would be your ideal self-care practices, both in terms of like basic self-care and that uppercase S, the highest, wisest, truest part in your spiritual practices, and also collective care? You’ve mentioned your group, but what would be your ideal? So my ideal and I try my, there’s certain things that are non-negotiables and you know, the number one for me is exercise. Unfortunately, and I know I have developed this reputation. I’m not sure how that I am against medication. I am not against medication at all. Are you kidding me? If I could use medication for the things that are difficult for me to get done, like anything to do with numbers or frankly, memorising anything, I would use medication in a heartbeat. It does not work for me, however. And so when things don’t work for you, you have to develop other workarounds.And so I’m so appreciative that medication didn’t work for me because if it did, I may not have gone out and developed the other workaround. So what we know, number one, my number one strategy is OK. 20 minutes of exercise at 70% of your high heart rate studies have been done about this is as effective as a course of Adderall and Prozac. Even if you are taking medication, it is going to make your medication work better and there are no side effects. So I work out every morning. I used to work out in the evenings.I’ve always worked out. There was something that my brain just knew I felt better. Um, so I’ve always worked out, but I used to work out in the evening.And when I discovered that I had ADHD, I realised, OK, I need to change this up because I feel like my brain is like an airplane on a runway and I need to get it off the runway. And what gets it off the runway first thing in the morning is dopamine. That’s, you know, what’s going on with our brains.We don’t know is that we make, we don’t make enough of it, or is it that we process it differently? They don’t know for 100% certainty what it is. And so I know I’ve got to get that dopamine up in the morning. And if I can do that, everything is better throughout the day.The first thing I do is I literally get up. It was hard initially, but at this point I have trained my brain (neuroplasticity) to the point that I get up in the morning and I’m like a robot. I never thought in my head, I don’t want to do this. It’s cold. It’s, it’s just so odd, but I think it’s because I know this is my medication and if I don’t do it, I’m going to feel bad.I would say it’s that, and then getting it out in nature. So I will do, we have two dogs, Teddy and Mo and I will take a walk with my husband. And then if I get up early enough, I really like to do some sort of reading in the morning rather than picking up my phone and scrolling,

Do you feel like your vegan diet or food allergies make you “difficult” at restaurants and social gatherings? You’re not alone. And you deserve better.In this World Vegan Month episode, I (author, trauma therapist, senior accredited supervisor etc, Eve Menezes Cunningham) share some of my journey from being an “awkward vegan” with a severe bell pepper allergy to (more) confidently advocating for my food needs. Learn how to:✨ Ask for what you need without shame✨ Use somatic techniques to feel empowered when ordering✨ Navigate social situations where you’re the only vegan✨ Recognise which people and places truly support your needs✨ Turn advocating for yourself (stating dietary requirements) into self-healingWhether you’re vegan, have food allergies, sensory issues with food or any dietary requirements, this episode validates your experiences and provides practical tools for feeling safe, welcome and nourished.Perfect for anyone with trauma, ADHD, or AuDHD who struggles with the extra layers of complexity around food choices.🎙️ Feel Better Every Day Podcast Episode 85 Host: Eve Menezes Cunningham Next week: Special guest Tracy Otsuka, author of “ADHD for Smart Ass Women”📚 Free resources and full transcript: selfcarecoaching.net#VeganLife #FoodAllergies #ADHD #TraumaHealing #SelfCare #Neurodivergent #WorldVeganMonthCHAPTERS(0:00–1:25) Asking for what you need and embracing awkwardness(1:25–3:50) Power poses, confidence, and feeling worthy of good things(3:50–5:44) Compassion for yourself when being vegan feels awkward(5:44–7:15) Sensory needs, boundaries, and finding your people(7:15–9:01) Speaking up for yourself and healing old wounds(9:01–11:24) Food, co-regulation, and making socialising easier(11:24–13:24) EFT tapping, tenderness, and trauma-informed care(13:24–16:10) Rippling kindness outward and staying idealisticFULL TRANSCRIPTDo you ever feel like being a vegan makes it hard for you to enjoy food out with friends, loved ones or even at home?Do you ever feel like you’re being too awkward if you have any kind of food allergy? This episode for World Vegan Month is for you and I want to encourage you to acknowledge the accommodations that you need and deserve and to help you ask for what you need with less shame.I’m nearly 50 and I am much better at it than I used to be but I used to call myself an awkward vegan for many years because I’m also allergic to bell peppers and they’re in so many vegan dishes.The older I get, I mean I say the older I get, a couple decades ago I was writing for an allergy magazine about the pepper allergy and it was before I went vegan but about the difficulty. It’s not one of the big 14 [allergens].Back then there was a big 10 and there’s more awareness around allergies but I guess the relevance for this episode is recognising the special needs needing to be accommodated like it could kill me. And it is very stressful a lot of the time and also I love food and I want to enjoy it, I don’t want to be off of the salads.Welcome to episode 85 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I’m your host Eve Menezes Cunningham and every Tuesday I share a new episode where it’s helping people with trauma, ADHD and AuDHD take better care of yourself, create a life you don’t need to retreat from and help build a world in which everyone feels safe, welcome and loved.This here is Mighty Meadbh and if you haven’t already subscribed you’re very welcome to and you can find out more information at the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and that will lead you to the book and all sorts of free resources as well as ways of working with me.For the Feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework today, I want to encourage you to get into your body to empower yourself. It might be that you feel a bit silly doing a power pose before making a phone call to a restaurant or even looking at a menu outside. But it’s hard being in a minority. And with food being so central. We co-regulate with other people and we connect with others so often through food so if you’re the only vegan in your circle it can be really challenging.You might want to take a power pose to remind yourself that just as you wouldn’t tell anyone else what they should or shouldn’t be eating no one else has a right to be telling you that. And you deserve delicious food.Notice the way you’re sitting. Notice if you can straighten up. Notice if you can send those signals of safety up via the vagus to the pons part of the brain (if it’s not too awkward depending on where you are when you are you might want to take a Power Pose).I’ve removed my arms from Meadbh I don’t know what she’ll do now. If you’re standing up, maybe place your hands on the hips but anything that helps you have that open-hearted posture.It’s not about being awkward. It’s not about being difficult. It’s about being polite but also knowing that you have a right to eat in a way that feels good for you.I’ve actually considered stopping being vegan because it feels so awkward sometimes and I just… it might be the justice sensitivity with the ADHD and it might be the trauma history and kind of taking the animal suffering, the bee suffering, so to heart, but I would really struggle to live with myself.I find it much easier to live with myself trying, I mean I’m not… like kind of that sounds dramatic. I don’t mean it like that. But it’s a friendlier way for me personally to walk through this life where humans do so much damage.To not be a part of that. But there’s nothing wrong with anyone making any choices that are right for them whether it’s through taste or through health reasons or anything else.But it’s about you giving yourself permission to know what you want and ask for what you want. Where there might be allergies it can be extra awkward. There’s generally more understanding around coeliac… it seems like kind of people seem to be doing well getting gluten-free food.There is a huge lack of awareness still around what vegan actually means. People are often like, “oh, it has eggs” or “it has honey”.It’s like that’s not vegan! Plant-based being offered a salad. Let yourself feel how you want to feel don’t be forcing yourself to contort your tastes. If you want chips that’s fine. If you want salad that’s fine but also know that you, like everyone else at the table, is worthy of a meal that you will genuinely enjoy and feel nourished by. You deserve that just as everyone else does.As we move to the Love part of the framework, remembering that you like everyone else are part of the Divine. Part of nature. And there’s no need to feel awkward.It might be that your dietary requirements have nothing to do with being vegan but it’s to do with sensory issues. And again, you have a right to eat in a way that feels good for you. That makes sense for you. You don’t need to change a thing.And it can sound harsh but I know for me with the being vegan and having the anaphylaxis pepper allergy… it filters out people who aren’t good for me. Because if someone is caring and considerate and patient… often people have… my loved ones… my partner has to be very patient sometimes where it’s so difficult for me to get something edible.It filters out people who are dismissive. Who consider one option that’s barely edible to make the venue a vegan restaurant. And food, again it can be so connecting, it can be so joyful, it can be so… and it can also make you feel like very disconnected.For the Love part of the framework this week, I really want you to just give yourself some love.Connect with that part of you that maybe doesn’t feel worthy of the… I was going to say concessions, the accommodations, the awkwardness.Know that someone would have no problem asking for whatever they wanted in a very specific way. You have every right to frequent establishments that make you feel welcome and that make you feel like you’re not putting them out and that they want to.And often, it’s really like kind of seemingly meaty places that will be the most welcoming, and where they specialise in that farm to table. Or it’s interesting. Don’t underestimate that there are some amazing places out there and where they will respect your vegan or other dietary requirements and treat you like someone who is deserving of food and you also like kind of really enjoying being there.Stop arguing with reality. If someone is making you feel worse about it then you might already be feeling that person isn’t good for you those people aren’t good for you. It might be that they’re family. It might be that you have to keep them in your life but you can really be extra tender with that part of yourself that feels rejected and potentially betrayed and uncared for having specific food requirements can be triggering in terms of inner child stuff coming up for healing. A lot of childhood stuff, a lot of like needs not having been met, all sorts of other needs additional needs so really be tender with yourself as it all comes up for healing. And recognise that every time you speak up for yourself, you are healing. You are shining a light on it. And you can bring other people on board. You can let them know how they can support you in it.One of the things that’s really helped me this year is taking on the booking for a group that I’m part of. It means I can do the research and I can make sure that there’s going to be something edible for me. Something delicious hopefully. I’ve been treated well so far but it makes me feel like I’m not then adding to the person booking workload.And also, that the person responsible for the food knows about the seriousness of the allergy....

Be Kinder to Your Extra Sensitive Nervous System: Episode 84 of the Feel Better Every Day PodcastStruggling to show yourself the same kindness you’d give others? If you have ADHD, autism, or trauma, your nervous system needs extra care—not extra pressure. This episode explores why self-compassion is essential for neurodivergent and trauma survivors—and how to practice it daily.Topics covered:Recognizing when you’re pushing yourself too hard (like working until 3am)Understanding your extra sensitive nervous systemThe 20,000 negative messages statistic and Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD)Reparenting yourself with tendernessThe Feel, Love, Heal framework for self-acceptanceBefriending your body and mind as they are right nowConnecting with neurodivergent communityResources mentioned:Workshop at The Yoga Root (Feb 15) - theyogaroot.orgSole to Soul Circle membership (from €8/month)EFT tap-along for RSD (bonus content)Free resources at selfcarecoaching.netBook: 365 Ways to Feel BetterYou deserve tenderness. You deserved more than you had. Let yourself grieve while you heal.📧 [email protected] 🌐 selfcarecoaching.net#ADHD #Autism #AuDHD #SelfCompassion #TraumaHealing #Neurodivergent #RSD #SelfCare #WorldKindnessDayCHAPTERS(0:00–0:33) Why it’s still so hard to be kind to ourselves(0:38–1:26) Discovering autism and learning to slow down(1:26–3:00) Overworking, late nights, and holding yourself accountable for rest(3:08–4:16) Understanding ADHD, emotional pain, and rejection sensitivity(4:16–5:41) Reparenting yourself and honouring what you’ve survived(5:48–7:04) Working gently with childhood memories and self-compassion(7:10–8:14) Befriending your changing body and mind(8:21–9:17) Finding connection and support within neurodivergent communities(9:40–10:27) Accepting yourself and allowing healing(10:27–11:00) Expressing your needs without apology(11:07–12:09) You deserve tenderness and kindness(12:09–13:31) Grieving what you didn’t have and helping build a kinder worldLINKSLove Yourself. Warts and All: I Swear inspired Episode 82 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast https://youtu.be/emoPrbHbc2M?si=HIP2MEp0QaD-E1Mt Shadow Work with Black Cats and Sharks:Episode 71 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast https://youtu.be/OudSMFHNDEo Be More Cat: Episode 70 of the Feel BetterEvery Day Podcast https://youtu.be/ZJQTjy372GY Love your inner Smelly Cat this Bealtaine andbeyond Episode 56 of The Feel Better Every Day Podcast https://youtu.be/daQopL3K7BY Cattitude: Purr! Hiss! Freeze! Episode 48 ofThe Feel Better Every Day Podcast https://youtu.be/atAcj0HtD6U FULL TRANSCRIPTAre you still struggling to be even a fraction as kind to yourself as you would be to anyone else, especially if you knew their trauma history or how much they struggle with ADHD AuDHD autism symptoms?This episode is to, as all of the episodes, helping people with trauma, ADHD AuDHD take better care of yourself, create a life you don’t need to retreat from and help build a world in which everyone feels safe, welcome and loved.So this is episode 84 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and I’m still in the early stages of processing the fact that I have autism as well as ADHD and again it’s making so much more sense of my nearly 50 years on the planet and having to be extra gentle with myself.I was kind of crying every day for a couple of weeks there and other stuff going on but recognising it even though all my work is about amping up the self-care and protecting the trauma survivor and neurodivergent extra sensitive nervous system, realising I was still trying to do way too much and really recognising that’s not friendly, that’s not kind.Even a little thing, like I worked weekends for many, many years. I’ve been self-employed for 21 years but for more than half of that I was constantly doing additional trainings and getting different certifications and so many additional things.When I started giving myself weekends off (apart from if I’m facilitating a workshop or at a conference or something) it has translated into often working really late on a Friday night in order to have the Saturday and Sunday off.The last few weeks, with everything going on it’s been like kind of till 1am, 3am. And that’s not kind to myself. That’s not helping in terms of the ADHD medication.It’s not. If anyone were saying that their boss was making them do that, I love my work so there’s that but also it’s not sustainable. I’m saying it here to keep myself accountable but if I don’t finish by 9 o’clock, 10 o’clock at the very, very, very latest I will get up early on a Saturday to do some because it’s better to have it on a Saturday or Sunday than to be becoming a routine late late late.You might have other things, I mean for me I think it is the over scheduling that is the biggest thing in terms of my nervous system and also really, really, really having to be gentle with myself.I’m gaining more understanding about ADHD medication having an impact on things like the Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) and how, apparently, our pain threshold which is pretty high with ADHD goes down.Neuroscience shows that emotional pain registers in a similar way, in the same way on brain scans, as physical pain. Rather than telling ourselves we shouldn’t care or that we’re too sensitive or anything like that, just recognising we do care, it does hurt. 2025 is an advanced practice living through everything that’s going on, I’m not going to even name the horrors, natural disasters, human inflicted horrors.But it’s a lot for any nervous system. Just recognising having to be extra tender with yourself so that’s the Feel part, let yourself feel, give yourself permission to self-regulate, give yourself permission to recognise the pain and the grief involved in learning these skills that seem to come so effortlessly to other people (although they probably don’t).Giving yourself permission to reparent yourself, imagining having grown up without all the trauma you’ve survived, imagine growing up in a world in which your autism, your ADHD was supported. And your gifts were nourished and nurtured. And you were not made to feel wrong.There’s that statistic that is still kind of playing on my mind from that 2024 study that was cited in Additude magazine around ADHD children receiving 20,000 more negative messages than neurotypical children by the age of 10.It really helps me recognise of course so many of us have RSD, Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria. Of course so many of us struggle with lots of things and letting ourselves laugh at ourselves as well, I regularly laugh at myself, have humour around it but honour the struggles, give yourself time to reparent yourself, let something emerge in terms of any memory that feels okay to work with.Recognising again this is a podcast. You’re not a one-to-one client of mine. You need to take responsibility for what you’re choosing to work with. But something that springs to mind, something, any memory that might be painful from childhood from any earlier time in your life and imagining how you could have been held better, how you could have been protected, how you could have, if not protected, then helped to understand the grief, the loss, the trauma, the symptom.And how the wider world isn’t set up and that’s not your fault and you’re not responsible for the emotional labour involved. Although I hope you enjoyed the I Swear episode, Episode 82 a couple weeks ago.Recognise that. Feel free to email [email protected] if you want to share how you’re being extra gentle with that younger part of yourself. Even acknowledging what you, with 2025 hindsight and all the knowledge you’ve accumulated over the years, would do differently to help younger you. Beginning the healing process there. And there are other tools and techniques obviously.For the Love part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework, accept yourself exactly as you are right now. Befriend that changing body and mind as you learn more and more about yourself. I’m facilitating a workshop at The Yoga Root which you can find out more about at theyogaroot.org on the 15th so there’s still time for you to book for that and it’s going to incorporate yoga, image work, special yoga nidra, EFT tapping, all sorts just helping people, myself included, stop arguing with reality. You often find it with injury or with illness rather than recognising, “OK this is where my body is right now, this is what I need in this moment, this is where my nervous system is right now, this is where my energy, this is where my chi, my prana is right now, this is what I need.” It’s like, “Aghhh, I should be able to ____” and that’s just adding the suffering instead of just recognising pain as part of life, suffering doesn’t have to be as torturous as we often make it.Ask yourself what it would take for you to befriend your body and mind exactly as you are...

Menopause? Perimenopause? Post menopause? A new diagnosis, illness or injury? Any kind of transition? Join me at the Yoga Root on Saturday 15th November at 1pm for a special workshop: Befriending your Changing Body and MindWatch hereHi, I’m Eve Menezes Cunningham, and welcome to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.This week we’re talking about why it’s often easier to hold space for others than to let ourselves be held.I’m joined by Elizabeth Potts, one of my favourite yoga teachers from The Yoga Root in Westport.We explore what it means to create authentic, nourishing spaces—and how to give ourselves grace when we’re struggling to receive care, even when we desperately need it.If you’ve ever found yourself crying with gratitude in a yoga class, or wondering why self-care feels so hard when caring for others comes naturally, this conversation is for you.New episodes every Tuesday morning (Ireland time). Subscribe for notifications. Join the Sole to Soul Circle for deeper dives including bonus interviews, EFT Tap Alongs, yoga poses, breath practices and meditations, journal prompts and more. Is the Feel Better Every Day Podcast helping you? Please share and leave a ★★★★★ rating and review. Your support helps me reach more trauma survivors and people with ADHD or AuDHD. Learning to care for, love and accept yourself is a radical act. Your healing creates ripples and helps others remember peace and ease is everyone’s birthright too. Míle buíochas (a thousand thank yous).CHAPTERS(2:40–3:45) Why it’s easier to hold space for others than to be held ourselves(6:56–8:37) Teaching with authenticity and not performing on the mat(9:00–10:53) Creativity as self-care through art, pottery, and connection with her daughter(11:14–13:29) Finding calm and grounding through breath when there’s no bandwidth(13:38–15:52) The mindful morning coffee ritual as an anchor through transition(17:35–19:24) The practice of returning to yourself and allowing imperfection(21:06–24:57) The need for community support and rebuilding the metaphorical villageLINKSPeace Begins at Home (with Gina Miltiadou): Episode 81 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast FULL TRANSCRIPTAnd I was delighted when you did. I remember you made amazing, was it vegan lemon poppy seed cake when I did a workshop there for you? Oh yeah, yeah. And it’s just that I didn’t know you but it just made me feel so again held and welcome, but I think that’s partly why I felt a bit tearful, now I can drive, now I can be there, like enjoy and just the vision, like how integral it is to Westport, how like it’s just so lovely that it’s taken root and it’s really gorgeous.Yeah, it really is special, it really is special and I think you can really feel, you know, the intention and the love and the work that’s gone into us, you know, and to make you a really authentic space is what it is, you know, if you come to my class or Derrick’s or, you know, our other teachers, all very unique classes, very different styles of teaching, but yeah, all very authentic, very much us, you know, so you would never catch me floating off the mat.Hi, you’re listening to episode 83 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I’m your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham, and I’m here to help people with trauma, ADHD, AuDHD, take better care of yourselves, create a life you don’t need to retreat from, and help build a world in which everyone feels safe, welcome, and loved, able to thrive.You can access full show notes, the transcript, links, and loads of other resources through thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and selfcarecoaching.net, and I really hope you enjoy my interview with the delightful Elizabeth Potts.She’s one of my favourite yoga teachers, and I really look forward to hearing your comments and questions, and what you’re going to do to give yourself as much grace as possible as you build community that is nourishing and supportive for yourself, as well as for others. Enjoy.Welcome Elizabeth Potts, thank you so much for joining me.As a little bit of background, today’s episode is kind of like why it’s sometimes so much easier to hold space for others than it is to allow ourselves to be held and cared for, and I know, like, I adore the work I do, and I struggle to relax into other people’s space-holding, trauma, ADHD, all the rest of it, and when I joined The Yoga Root a couple months ago now, I think, because I only learned to drive, so I knew you a little bit, I knew Derrick, but your first class I attended, I nearly wept with gratitude.Seriously, I cannot tell you just how amazing that space felt, and how I hadn’t realised how much I needed it, I hadn’t, like, and I’ve been just going to as many classes as I can, just absolutely loving it, but I wanted to thank you for being here, and to also ask you to introduce yourself, say what you do, I’ve kind of launched in.Thank you.Where can people find you?Yeah, so I’m teaching out of The Yoga Root almost every day, and yoga teacher slash mother slash all around everything, so I’m busy, but I really love the work that I do, you said you’re really passionate about your work, and what you said is why I really love the work that I do, because it’s a very connected type of work, you know, I’m not just sitting and pushing buttons, or something like that, but I’m actually, you know, feeling like the push and pull between my students, my inner, my inner self, as I’m teaching, as I’m practising, and teaching has become very much a part of my personal yoga practice as well.The Yoga Root, we’ve been open five years now, and it has been just an amazing space to come into with Derrick and Conor, the owners, and to kind of create this community here that me and Derrick really wanted as teachers previously, who were kind of teaching around at all different places, we really wanted a space that was warm, and ours, and developed, you know, into something that could really nurture people, and so yeah, I feel like we’ve really been able to create that over the years.Yeah, I remember, so I met Derrick, I covered one of his classes when I first moved to Ireland in 2019, and I was in a studio rental, it was this teeny tiny, like a friend called it a glorified shed, and I had a cupboard, and like not a proper bed, and Rainbow, my cat, was basically, she was so traumatised by the journeys, and all the moves, and the first time I ever met Derrick, he went straight over to my bed to talk to Rainbow, and he was like, I’d mentioned Rainbow to everyone who’d been there, but he was like the first person who made a beeline for her, and it was just like, I remember him saying about wanting to create this space, and being delighted when you did, I remember you made amazing, was it vegan lemon poppy seed cake? When I did a workshop there a few years ago, and it’s just like, I didn’t know you, but it just made me feel so, again, held, and welcomed, but I think that’s partly why I felt a bit tearful, now I can drive, now I can be there, like enjoy classes, and just the vision, like how integral it is to Westport, how like, it’s just so lovely that it’s taken root, and it, yeah, I’m feeling a bit tearful today, it’s really gorgeous.Yeah, it really is special, it really is special, and I think you can really feel, you know, the intention, and the love, and the work that’s gone into us, you know, into making a really authentic space, is what it is, you know, if you come to my class, or Derrick’s, or you know, our other teachers, all very unique classes, very different styles of teaching, but yeah, all very authentic, very much us, you know, so you would never catch me floating off the mat, I’m definitely, yeah, a real kind of connection person, yeah, so if I’m having a bad day, you know, I like to kind of let people know that, hey, you know, I’m tired too, I’m there with you, you know, and let’s, let’s move, and because I honestly believe that stepping onto your mat, just stepping onto it, is enough action, yeah, to help you through.Yeah, whatever’s going on, so, and also by not arguing with reality, by acknowledging that you’re tired, rather than trying to perform, right, I mean, you’ve just explained why your classes are, you’re one of my all-time favourite teachers, and it is that kind of, rather than, “I’m going to plough through, I’m going to…” it’s like, yeah, no, everyone is struggling, everyone is suffering, and everyone is joyful, everyone, like, it’s all of it.It’s well, yeah, we have all the things, yeah, and yeah, being on your mat, doing your practice, you know, like, it’s, it’s meant to be a very personal thing, and so if you’re, you know, feeling like you have to perform, it’s hard to be in your personal space, so, yeah.In terms of my Feel. Love. Heal. framework, so the Feel bit is the active self-care, when you’ve got the energy, the bandwidth to do something that might help you feel better, regulate your nervous system, whatever that might be, what would be your ideal, and what is realistic with life, hectic life?I’d be a very creative type of person, you know, so ideally, I would be every day doing some bit of art, yeah, I take watercolour classes from one of my students, I take pottery classes with one of my friends. It’s a really good way of kind of exploring my mind, and my feelings, and stuff like that, through creating something tangible in front of me, so ideally, I’d be doing that all the time.But of course, child care really comes into play a lot, so...

Inspired by the stunning film “I Swear” about living with Tourette’s, this episode explores why self-compassion is so difficult, especially with trauma, ADHD and AuDHD (autism and ADHD). Discover how acceptance and love can transform shame into advocacy, and learn practical ways to be gentler with yourself.Using my Feel. Love. Heal framework, I (trauma therapist, ADHDer, only recently recognised AuDHDer - brand new emotional rollercoaster - senior accredited supervisor, Self care coach, author and columnist, Eve Menezes Cunningham) share some self-care ideas the film inspired. You deserve the same compassion you give others.Is the Feel Better Every Day Podcast helping you? Please leave a ***** rating and review for this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed. Your sharing, subscribing, feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and ADHD or AuDHD (autism and ADHD). You learning to take better care of yourself isn’t just good for you – it creates a ripple effect and helps others. My ultimate dream, in a world in which SO much is coming up for healing and so many people are unsafe, is to do my part to help as many people as possible heal from trauma. To help create a world in which everyone everywhere feels safe, welcome and loved - able to thrive.CHAPTERS0:00 Why it’s so hard to have compassion for ourselves1:10 Understanding ourselves through trauma and neurodivergence5:11 Using the Feel. Love. Heal. framework10:25 Learning to help ourselves heal14:18 Creating a world where everyone feels safe and loved18:22 Healing through connection and community21:11 The ripple effect of healing and hopeRESOURCESCattitude: Purr! Hiss! Freeze! Episode 48 of The Feel Better Every Day Podcast Be More Cat: Episode 70 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast Shadow Work with Black Cats and Sharks: Episode 71 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast https://selfcarecoaching.net/2023/08/07/cattitude-familiars-and-polyvagal-theory/https://selfcarecoaching.net/2022/10/19/cattitude-life-lessons-from-my-first-9-years-on-earth/https://selfcarecoaching.net/feline/https://selfcarecoaching.net/2021/02/17/bring-more-cattitude-to-the-way-you-move/https://selfcarecoaching.net/2019/09/30/cat-coaching-for-self-care-3-cattitude/FULL TRANSCRIPTWhy is it so hard to have the kind of compassion and empathy and understanding we so often find so easy to direct towards anyone else, towards ourselves, especially with trauma histories, with ADHD, with ADHD, with autism? Why?This episode, 82 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast is inspired by the phenomenal film I Swear, based on John Davidson’s memoir about living with Tourette’s and becoming an advocate. I hope you enjoy it.Hi, you’re listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.I’m your host and producer, Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m a trauma therapist, trauma survivor, ADHDer. Now I’ve heard about the AuDHD, learning more about the autism, that the ADHD medication, it’s a learning curve. It’s a lot. And it’s also helpful, the more we understand ourselves, the better.I’m a self-care coach, senior accredited supervisor, author, columnist, you can access more information about the Sole to Soul Circle, the book, full show notes and transcripts and links at selfcarecoaching.net and also thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com. You can listen wherever you get your podcasts.I release new episodes every Tuesday, helping people with trauma, ADHD and AuDHD, take better care of yourself, create a life you don’t need to retreat from and help create a world in which everyone feels safe, welcome and loved, able to thrive.And again, back to this amazing film, it’s just so phenomenal. I recognised an enormous, so sorry, I’ve just skipped ahead an enormous amount. I Swear, I’m recording it, it’s out in cinemas at the moment in Ireland. It might be out on one of the streaming services or still in the cinema by the time you see this in a few weeks. His memoir is available, John Davidson.I sobbed, I howled with laughter, I was shouting at the TV, not the TV, the big screen. It was amazing. I had to leave the cinema at one point and I wanted to leave at other points with the brutality of what he was having to deal with.And the film shows this young, confident football enthusiast lad starting high school and then developing Tourette’s. So you see him go from confident and like asking a girl out on his first day of school and being like told that a scout is going to watch the football game and then he begins to develop the tics and the outbursts.I recognised a lot of the impulsivity and self-loathing and also the enormous potential for healing through compassion. But seeing it on the big screen, so visible, so desperate to just give him an enormous hug and move him away from all that pain, that kind of wishing that everyone could see this film and have more compassion for themselves and the differences they struggle with, whether to do with Tourette’s or any kind of physical or mental condition or emotional or any kind of difference.Like you think about the way people are othering immigrants, refugees, people from other backgrounds, all sorts of gender. It’s incredible how this young man was able to turn so much pain into advocacy for so many people who needed that support and that understanding.And through doing that, he found more for himself. It’s beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. I wasn’t the only one sobbing in the cinema. And I think it’s, I can’t remember the last time a film ended and everyone just sat there. And one of the people I’ve been telling, watch this film, said, now when you do the podcast, don’t give the ending away, don’t give too much away. So I’m going to try and avoid spoilers.But it’s based on his true story. We know he survives. We know he wrote a memoir.We know he told the Queen to fuck off when he got to meet the Queen. They’re not spoilers. They’re all from the very beginning.Using the Feel. Love. Heal. framework to move through some of the lessons from, I Swear, this gorgeous, gorgeous film. The Feel element of the framework I developed, it’s very much about the active self-care when you have the bandwidth to do things, to help yourself regulate, to help yourself feel better. And he got to the stage where he was able to research Tourette’s as someone with the lived condition.But it took a long time for him to get there because unfortunately, when the symptoms appeared, his parents were not in a place where they could support him. Instead, they contributed to the shame and the pain and the horror of his young life, which he tried to end at a very early age. And luckily, he survived.And also, very luckily, when he was a bit older, he meets the friend’s mother, an old school friend’s mother, who they all think is dying and she has six months to live. He kind of has an outburst saying something like, “Ha ha, you’re going to die!” something deeply inappropriate.It was laugh out loud. It was so funny in parts, and so horrendous, and so relatable in so many ways, because all of us have shame, have fear, have embarrassment, have things we worry about being too much, saying too much, moving weirdly, all sorts of things. He had no control over it. And he learned to live with it.He learned to advocate for others. But that was through his friend’s mother being the first person really to see him and to accept him and to help him begin to understand himself and come off the horrendous medication and work with life, stop arguing with reality, like kind of they all made mistakes, like everyone’s human. But her attitude, so accepting, so loving, it kind of takes me then to the love element of the framework.But she was active. It was very active, her inviting this stranger into her home, telling her husband and her son, who was his friend, that she had invited him to stay. She recognised that things were tough for him at his home.And her argument for doing so much to help him was she only had six months to live. He begins to find acceptance through, for the first time in his life, being accepted, being told to not apologise for anything he can’t help. And he’s had a lifetime of brutal, brutal punishments for things he can’t help, which, of course, we know would trigger a stress response, which would make it much more likely that these outbursts, that these tics would become more amplified, because he’s then terrified.He’s in a sympathetic survival response, “Hiss!” in terms of the Cattitude [Polyvagal Purrs] way of explaining polyvagal theory. You can find links to the episodes around that in the show notes. It’s so obvious that, had the grown-ups, even not understanding about Tourette’s, just having a bit more care and compassion for a young boy in pain, how different his life could have been, and how he’s able to recognise that he might not have done any differently if he’d been in one of the different positions.I’m a little bit all over the place. I’ve been so excited about sharing this film...

Am so delighted to welcome the Peace Begins at Home Summit Director, Gina Miltiadou, for Episode 81 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Access full transcripts, links, show notes, and other resources at http://thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.comThe inaugural Peace Begins at Home Summit will take place on Wednesday, 29th October 2025 (and you can listen to the recordings for 30 days so don’t worry if you can’t make that day).At a time of rising authoritarianism, climate crisis, and lost hope, the Summit combines lived testimony, research, and practical solutions to reclaim a culture of partnership.Produced by the Center for Partnership Systems (CPS) and inspired by cultural historian Dr. Riane Eisler’s Partnership vs. Domination framework, the Summit reframes peace not as a distant ideal but as a systems challenge that begins where we live, love, and raise each other: In the home. Confirmed speakers include 26 leaders from 17 countries, among them:Dr. Riane Eisler – Holocaust survivor, cultural historian, systems scientist, and author of The Chalice and the BladeAmbassador Anwarul K. Chowdhury – Former UN Under-Secretary-General and champion of the culture of peaceDr. Richard Davidson – World-renowned neuroscientist and TIME 100 honoreeEla Gandhi – Global peace activist, women’s rights advocate and granddaughter of Mahatma GandhiGary Barker & Jackson Katz – International pioneers in reshaping masculinityAngela Sterritt – Award-winning investigative journalist and author, serving as MCFind out more and book at www.peacebeginsathomesummit.orgCHAPTERS0:00 Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the state of the world2:08 Introducing Gina Miltiadou and the Peace Begins at Home Summit2:53 The ripple effect of early trauma4:10 Self-care when you’re near the finish line5:41 Purpose as a form of self-care7:07 Interconnectedness and hope8:15 Dr. Riane Eisler’s domination to partnership framework15:19 Peace begins at home17:30 Turning pain into purpose20:05 Stories of healing and collective care25:16 Peace is personalThanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get an exclusive deeper dive each week.Is the Feel Better Every Day Podcast helping you? Please leave a ***** rating and review for this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed. Your subscribing, feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD. You learning to take better care of yourself isn’t just good for you – it creates a ripple effect and helps others. My ultimate dream, in a world in which SO much is coming up for healing and so many people are unsafe, is to do my part to help as many people as possible heal from trauma. To help create a world in which everyone everywhere feels safe, welcome and loved - able to thrive.CHAPTERS0:00 Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the state of the world2:08 Introducing Gina Miltiadou and the Peace Begins at Home Summit2:53 The ripple effect of early trauma4:10 Self-care when you’re near the finish line5:41 Purpose as a form of self-care 7:07 Interconnectedness and hope8:15 Dr. Riane Eisler’s domination to partnership framework15:19 Peace begins at home17:30 Turning pain into purpose20:05 Stories of healing and collective care25:16 Peace is personalDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.FULL TRANSCRIPTDo you ever feel overwhelmed and despairing at repeated patterns of horror endlessly perpetuated by humans, as if we never learn from the past? This episode’s for you. Feel Better Every Day. No, seriously.It’s easy to feel helpless and hopeless, to go into that dorsal vagal “Freeze!” response. To feel completely overwhelmed, disconnected. Today’s guest has some hope and inspiration for you. Episode 81, I’m delighted to welcome you to Gina Miltiadou. She is the director of the Peace Begins at Home Summit. I’ll be sharing our interview together.Welcome! You’re listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast (in spite of that gloomy intro). And I hope that you will find it helpful. Each Tuesday, I share new episodes, and they’re designed to help you work with the Feel. Love. Heal. framework I developed.Today’s episode is very much in that Heal part, the collective care element, the co-regulation, the systemic elements of we’re all connected. The better we take care of ourselves and each other, the better for everyone.You can find out more about the book, the podcast and older episodes and other free resources around trauma, ADHD, anxiety, sleep, menopause, being a solopreneur, all sorts of things, as well as ways in which we might work together, upcoming events, all of that at selfcarecoaching.net or the feelbettereverydaypodcast.com.For now, welcome, welcome, welcome to this special episode, which I hope will inspire you.So welcome, Gina. Thank you so much for joining me. And do you want to say a little bit about the summit and what you’re doing?Yes, of course. Well, firstly, thank you so much for having me. It’s wonderful to have a chance to talk about this. But yes, I’m organising a global summit, which is happening on the 29th of October. And it is inspired by Dr. Riane Eisler’s work, which I’m sure we’ll talk more about later.But what it is doing, it’s gathering 26 speakers from 17 different countries around the world. And essentially, we’re examining how early trauma or care experienced in the home ripples out into society and all the systems that we live in. So that’s my current project.I love that so much. My membership is called the Sole to Soul Circle, like the soles of the feet to the soul. But it used to be called Personal Peace, because it was very much about the more where, OK, whether we’ve been raised in that caring environment, or whether we’ve healed that trauma, that then ripples out the intergenerational healing, all of it.That’s exactly it. Wonderful.I’m going to include a link in the show notes, but your summit takes place, this is going to go out on Tuesday.It’s going to be tomorrow, as far as people watching are concerned.It’s on the 29th of October. It’s the week after next.I got the dates wrong! I was like, quick, quick, I really want to include it. Oh, that’s okay.Yeah. Okay, so that’s fantastic. People have even more time to sort it out.Exactly, exactly. And the best place to register is just go to peacebeginsathomesummit.org and they can register online.So brilliant. And there’ll be a link in the show notes. Great. So you are very, very busy at the moment. Really appreciate you taking the time to talk to me. How is your self care in terms of the feel part of my Feel. Love. Heal. framework? The kind of active self-care? What are your essential daily practices that you rely on or don’t have time for at the moment?Oh, goodness. Eve, I do not want to lie to you. I am 10 days away from the summit so my self-care is kind of non-existent at the moment. It is about just getting to the finish line at the moment. This has been a project that has been in the making for the whole year. And it’s wonderful that we’re kind of reaching the finish line. But you know, part of it is, just being gentle with myself and giving myself permission to almost not self-care, not guilting myself into, oh my God, I really should be minding myself better. I know that, but I actually just do not have the time. So I think it’s also just loving myself enough to kind of go, you know what, that’s okay. This is a season. It’s 10 days to go. You’re not getting as much sleep as you need. You’re not eating as well as you can, but that’s what needs to happen right now.So it’s the odd thing. I think getting outside and getting fresh air when I can has made a massive difference. Even just the little things like taking the dog for a walk or just watching a really stupid, mindless piece on Netflix has really helped as well.And I’m not going to lie, you know, chocolate and wine has also helped.Excellent. And I’m also thinking what you’re doing because it’s so meaningful. It’s different to if you were in a job you hated and the grind and like this just, we’ve only just met, but the purpose is a part of self care and like giving yourself grace.That’s gorgeous. Exactly.Exactly. And I think that’s the thing is because this has been so purpose led, it’s actually been easy to do. I mean, even though I really am exhausted, but I’m also so psyched about it and I’m so buzzed about it.And I think, you know, just meeting all of the different speakers and hearing their stories and just the, I suppose, the feeling that this is really going to make a difference at a time when people need it so, so badly. People want hope so badly is enough to keep me going because it’s just bigger than all of us. Yeah.That leads us beautifully into the Love part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework I developed. Love. You don’t need to do a thing. You are already part of nature, part of the divine. You don’t need to be...

Stop feeling guilty. Start making a difference. In Own Your Privilege, Change the World: Episode 80 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, I (trauma therapist, senior accredited supervisor, Self care coach, author, ADHDer etc, Eve Menezes Cunningham) explore why owning your privilege (rather than apologising for it) can support sustainable activism. Learn how guilt disempowers you while self-care and honest acknowledgment of your advantages can fuel meaningful change. Discover why thriving isn’t selfish, it’s necessary for the resistance. Everyone deserves to feel safe, welcome and loved and able to thrive and the more you do to empower yourself, the more you can do to help others. So forgive yourself for injustices you have no part in and then speak up to do what you can to fix what’s happening now. THE FEEL BETTER EVERY DAY PODCAST Learn from the Self (for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself) and self-care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas through the lens of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework to help you: • Feel. Regulate your nervous system, work with your energy and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from • Love. Accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and • Heal. Collective care to turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large (and to coregulate and accept support from others) Thanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get an exclusive deeper dive (these include bonus interviews, EFT Tap Alongs, yoga poses, breath practices, journal prompts and more) each week. Is the Feel Better Every Day Podcast helping you? Please leave a ***** rating and review for this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed. Your subscribing, feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD. You learning to take better care of yourself isn’t just good for you – it creates a ripple effect and helps others. My ultimate dream, in a world in which SO much is coming up for healing and so many people are unsafe, is to do my part to help as many people as possible heal from trauma. To help create a world in which everyone everywhere feels safe, welcome and loved - able to thrive. CHAPTERS (0:00) Prioritising your personal priorities (1:14) Your suffering helps no one (2:50) Acknowledging privilege (10:59) Forgive yourself and do better (15:30) Do more of what helps you feel good (18:11) Finding balance through compassion and action (20:56) Ho’oponopono and Metta meditation RESOURCES: https://ejeancarroll.substack.com/p/grab-him-by-the-wallet WANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision). WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say “Hi” and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunningham Insta @evemenezescunningham @rescuecattitude @thefeelbettereverydaypodcast Facebook @FeelBetterEveryDay TikTok @evemenezescunningham Substack @evemc Bluesky @eveimcDISCLAIMER The content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.

And you can find out more by booking your spot, from as little as £25, for Online Events’ Living and Working with Neurodivergence conference where I’ll be presenting on Cattitude: A Polyvagal Informed Approach to Self Care for ADHD and Trauma – selfcarecoaching.net has a link to book tickets)I was able to own that part of myself that wants to do it all in one go. I can say, “Oh that’s so sweet! So delusional! Let’s not do that this time! Let’s be gentler!”Struggling with the overdoing-overwhelm-collapse cycle?In this episode, I (trauma-informed therapist, Self care, ADHDer, senior accredited supervisor etc, Eve Menezes Cunningham) share a lawn mowing lesson that changed how I approach tasks.Learn how doing less can actually help you accomplish more. This, like all episodes, takes you through my unique holistic Feel. Love. Heal. framework to help you bring more gentleness and ease into your daily life while getting more done. More smoothly, easily and effectively.Perfect for anyone who tends to go full speed ahead and then crash.THE FEEL BETTER EVERY DAY PODCASTLearn from the Self (for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself) and self-care practices the professionals depend on.With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas through the lens of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework to help you:• Feel: Regulate your nervous system, work with your energy and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from• Love: Accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and• Heal: Collective care to turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large (and to coregulate and accept support from others)Thanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get an exclusive deeper dive (these include bonus interviews, EFT Tap Alongs, yoga poses, breath practices, journal prompts and more) each week.If you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your subscribing, feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.CHAPTERS(0:02) Introduction: overdoing and overwhelm(0:45) Using the Feel. Love. Heal. framework(1:44) The lawn mowing lesson: less is more(3:52) Applying gentleness beyond the lawn(4:24) Feel: identify one area of overwhelm(5:33) Love: self-compassion and acceptance(6:20) The office move example(9:17) Talking kindly to yourself(10:33) Heal: co-regulation and collective care(12:49) Closing reflections and invitation to connectRESOURCESWANT TO WORK WITH ME?• There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos.• All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net• You can join the Sole to Soul Circle and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme.• If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc• Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision).WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA?You can find me almost everywhere – please say “Hi” and share your questions or comments:YouTube @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunningham @rescuecattitude @thefeelbettereverydaypodcast Facebook @FeelBetterEveryDayTikTok @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTDo you ever overdo things and then find yourself unable to do the simplest of things because it hasn’t worked out?You’re listening to episode 79 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I’m your host Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m an author, trauma therapist and survivor, senior accredited supervisor, ADHDer and so on.You can find out more and access lots of free resources and other information at selfcarecoaching.net.Every Tuesday I share a new episode to help trauma survivors and ADHDers take better care of yourselves and create a life you don’t need to retreat from.In today’s episode we’re using my Feel. Love. Heal. framework to explore the reality that can be especially hard for us to grasp in terms of less being more. It’s one of those things in terms of baby steps, turtle steps, taking things slower, not launching full speed ahead and then overwhelmed paralysis, all the rest of it.A few weeks ago I had a visceral experience and I’m hoping that sharing it with you and some self-care ideas will inspire you to go easier on yourself, be gentler with yourself and get more effective in terms of what you’re choosing to do.I was going to say get more done but it’s like NO, you deserve rest, you deserve peace, you deserve ease. As a byproduct of that you will get more done because there’ll be less chaos.A few weeks ago I was mowing my lawn. As a bit of a disclaimer, I’m nearly 50 but I’ve only had a lawn to mow the last few years because I lived in tiny little studio flats for so long. It’s been a steep learning curve. I’m still trying to rewild sections, I am rewilding sections but it’s all been a big learning curve. My partner finally convinced me to get a petrol lawnmower rather than the manual lawnmower that I had been using barefoot to get grounding while I mowed.Obviously can’t do that with a petrol lawnmower because it would be too dangerous but that little manual mower it would take me hours to do this small little front lawn and the petrol lawnmower is much more effective. He saw how I was doing it when it was a bit overgrown because the weather (blah blah blah lots of reasons, not been keeping on top of it and the west coast of Ireland is phenomenal and there’s a lot of rain and that makes it really lush and also it grows really quickly. You can’t mow wet grass, it takes much longer so it had got quite long again even though I was doing my best to keep on top of it so another metaphor for feeling overwhelmed and chaotic).When he saw what I was doing, he suggested that I do half lines so rather than like side by side redoing half of the line and then the next line redoing half of the line. I had to obviously bite back some of my pathological demand avoidance (PDA) but I tried it because I have been experimenting more and more with gentleness with taking it easy.And it was like, “Huh! It really does work!”I didn’t have to stop as often and it was a joy. So it has been something having had that visceral experience that I’ve been applying to other areas of my life in terms of less being more.Taking the gentler approach feels like it’s going to take much longer but ultimately, actually is not only easier but takes less time than the old overdoing it, collapse, overdoing it, overwhelm, overdoing it, paralysis… I hope this episode will help you.For the Feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. Framework, I want you to identify something in your life where you tend to go full speed ahead and end up in chaos. End up feeling overwhelmed. End up feeling miserable and ineffective and like you can’t do anything.And if you’re anything like I used to be, you might be thinking, “ALL areas of my life!”List all of them. List everything that comes up. And then pick one. You can do this for the others. It won’t take long but start with one. I still find that hard to do myself because I want to do All The Things at once. But identify one problem one area in your life and know that the others that you’ve listed are there safely for you to return to when you have found some peace and ease and gentleness around this first area.For the Love part of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework it’s more… so the Feel part is the self-care the lowercase s, something you’re doing to regulate. You’re taking action. In this case, emptying your brain. Making it visible externally.For the Love part, it’s more of that uppercase S Self care. The beyond the person. The Love archetype (in psychosynthesis). It’s about finding affection for that part of...

Join me (trauma-informed therapist etc, Eve Menezes Cunningham) as I welcome Alice Tew and Carly Radford, hosts of the podcast “Too Much… Apparently.”We explore sensitivity as a gift rather than a flaw, sharing practical nervous system regulation techniques and the power of radical self-acceptance.Discover why tiny non-negotiables work better than perfect routines, how the pandemic became a turning point for Carly embracing authenticity, and why building chosen family through friendship can be transformative.Perfect for highly sensitive people, those with ADHD and autism, trauma survivors, and anyone who’s ever been told they’re “too much.”You’ll learn about:· Nervous system awareness· micro self-care practices· parts work therapy· community building· neurodivergent experiences, and· moving from self-criticism to self-compassion.Find Alice at @reparentingwithalice and Carly at @the_sensitivity_therapistCHAPTERS(0:00) Introduction and podcast context(1:00) Guest introductions(4:00) Sensitivity and self-care(8:30) Nervous system awareness(12:00) Tiny non-negotiables(15:00) Love and acceptance(19:00) The pandemic as a turning point(22:00) Radical self-acceptance(26:00) Collective care and community(30:00) Redefining family and support(35:00) Building community through friendshipFULL TRANSCRIPTI’m delighted to welcome Alice Tew and Carly Radford, who are here to talk about whatever they want to talk about, but I invited them on because I’ve known their names for a long, long time, but I’ve got to know them better online through a neurodivergent therapy group, and they have a gorgeous new podcast, Too Much… Apparently, and it’s so lovely.Hi, you’re listening to episode 78 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I’m your host and producer Eve Menezes Cunningham. I’m a trauma-informed therapist, including embodied approaches, energetic approaches. I’m a trauma survivor. I have ADHD and I’m a senior accredited supervisor with BACP and a supervisor with IACP.I’m also an author and columnist and a self-care coach where I integrate lots of different ways of working for a really embodied approach, but really all my work is about helping you remember that you already know what you need.I help people with trauma and ADHD to take better care of themselves and their Self, that highest, wisest, truest, most joyful, brilliant, miraculous part of yourself. It really is remembering you are already whole. You’re already complete. You are worthy. You’re lovable. You’re not too much. You are enough.And with that in mind, I am utterly delighted to be welcoming today’s guests and look forward to hearing what you think of today’s episode. If you haven’t already, do subscribe and I would love to hear from you, either in the comments or you can email eve at selfcarecoaching.netYou can find out more about the book, the podcast, free resources, all sorts of things at selfcarecoaching.net or thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com.I’m delighted to welcome Alice Tew and Carly Radford, who are here to talk about whatever they want to talk about, but I invited them on because I’ve known their names for a long, long time, but I’ve got to know them better online through a neurodivergent therapy group and they have a gorgeous new podcast, Too Much… Apparently, and it’s so lovely and I wanted to have them on here.I’m going to ask Alice and then Carly to introduce yourselves, including any links you want people to go to and they’ll be in the show notes as well.Welcome, welcome, welcome and thank you.So shall I start?Yeah, OK.I’m Alice Tew. I’m a psychotherapist. I’m based in Cheshire, but I work completely online. I mainly work with people who have kind of harshly critical parents and so kind of dealing with the emotional fallout of that. The best way to find me is on Instagram, where you’ll find me @reparentingwithalice. Yeah, that’s me.I was admiring earlier your little hello sign because your email is hello at Alice Tew. Do you want to give your website as well?Yeah, so my website is alicetew.com.Perfect. Thank you. And Carly?Yes, hello. My name is Carly Radford. I am a nurse by background before retraining as a psychotherapist and I also work solely online with doing individual therapy and running groups. I specialise in a few areas, but I put those under the theme of sensitivity. I’m known as the sensitivity therapist and I work with either inherent or acquired sensitivity. And essentially what I mean by that is inherent is if you feel you were born a highly sensitive person, neurodivergent, autistic, ADHD. You have always felt like a sensitive person in the world.And I also work with acquired sensitivity. So if that is through stressful life situations, traumatic events, chronic anxiety, anything that over time has essentially made your nervous system more sensitive and more reactive in the world. That’s ultimately what I specialise in. You can find me on Instagram @the_sensitivity_therapist with underscores between the words. My website is currently being redeveloped, but it will be carlyradford.com. And yeah, email wise, I’m just hello at carlyradford.com.Thank you so much. I’m going to ask you both about sensitivity because you had a lovely episode about it. And I think it’s so important. I think especially with trauma, with ADHD, we grow up, we get so told, oh, you’re being too sensitive, you’re too.And we can recognise that it is a gift and we can also internalise shame around it. And I’m nearly 50 and I’m like happier than I’ve ever been, but it’s still like, oh God, I’m crying again. And it’s I’ll cry out of joy as well. It’s like fully emotional landscape. It’s the whole, but I just loved what you were saying.We’ll start with the Feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. Framework I created. If you tell me a bit about what you would recommend and what you’ve both done in terms of regulating, in terms of that kind of more active self care around sensitivity, when it all feels too much, if that’s OK.Yes. Yeah.Or should I go? Or should you go? When there’s three of you, it’s like, who talks first? Who knows, who knows who to go? No, I’m just nodding and you can’t see who I’m nodding at. Yes. So I, I have always described myself.Well, I say always more in later years, I’ve always described myself as sensitive, but I now very much realised that I am very sensitive, deep, deep in my bones. And what I mean when I say the word sensitive is I can react quite strongly emotionally to things in the world. And a bit like you said, it’s both in a way that can be challenging and also in a way that can be really lovely and beautiful in terms of those strong emotional reactions.And I also describe it of having quite a reactive nervous system. So seemingly small things, or that may be small to other people are not small to my nervous system. And ultimately can, well, that can respond in various ways, but I would often say that that can translate to like emotional overwhelm or, or feeling, feeling stressed, feeling like things are a little bit too much.And it’s only in later years that I’ve come to really recognise that and start to embrace that as that is who I am in the world. So particularly, I’d say particularly over the last five years, I’ve more like radically been moving, been moving towards that acceptance. And you mentioned from the field perspective of the framework that you work with, how I, how I regulate, I think that what you were asking me? Yeah.I regulate my nervous system through various ways, some of it’s not super conscious, it’s automatic. I will sing throughout the day quite a lot as I’m just going about the day. And I think singing just automatically helps to regulate my nervous system.And there’s a lot of science behind that, actually, which I didn’t say.The exhalation, so you’re activating the parasympathetic branch of the nervous system. And you’re also using your voice. So yeah, helping tone the vagus.Yes, yes, it’s all related to the vagus nerve. And whether that’s the breathing part, really taking control of your breath, slow, really slowing it down and controlling it. And also through the through the vibrations of your vocal cords, and what that is essentially doing from biofeedback to the vagus nerve. So there are various things that influence singing. So I think singing can be good.Joining a singing group, for example, but also just even if you’re humming to yourself throughout the day. So I’ve learned that there are things that I just do automatically throughout the day that help. So singing, vocalising things.And I like to just talk out loud to my dogs in various accents and things like that. Just almost using the voice as a form of play, I think really, really helps. And then there are the more active things that help regulate my nervous system.And they might be things like just curling up on the sofa, blanket wrapped around me, maybe heated blanket, cup of something warm and a good book or something crafty. If I’m really overwhelmed, the crafty thing won’t be too challenging. It could even just be an adult colouring book, something that doesn’t involve much thought, but that’s something that always helps me.I love it.And before I ask Alice, I also wanted to applaud your talking about your nervous system. And it sounded like that acceptance. And we all, all mammals have our nervous systems. And with trauma, with ADHD, we grow up, like thinking there’s something wrong with it. Whereas the...

You’ve heard of the Fight or Flight Stress Response but what about Tend and Befriend?Ever wonder why you automatically say "yes" to everything, even when you don't want to? You're not broken - you're responding from a place of survival. In this episode, we explore the "tend and befriend" stress response, why it's so common in women, other minorities, and ADHDers, and how it kept our ancestors (and us when we were younger) alive.You'll learn:Tend and Befriend v the better known Fight or Flight stress responsesWhy people-pleasing is actually adaptive survival behaviourHow ADHD masking connects to this trauma responseThe difference between Tend and Befriend and FawnPractical steps to start setting boundaries without (well, with less. Progress not perfection) guiltRemember: Your nervous system was wired this way to keep you safe. Now you get to choose how to move forward. 💙Resources mentioned:Feel Better Every Day Podcast: feelbettereverydaypodcast.com – especially the Purr! Hiss! Freeze! ep which goes into greater detail around Polyvagal Theory and adaptive survival responsesSole to Soul Circle membershipSelf Care Coaching: selfcarecoaching.net#TraumaHealing #ADHD #PeoplePleasing #TendAndBefriend #TraumaResponse #Boundaries #NervousSystemHealingChapters(0:00) What is the Tend and Befriend Response?(0:38) Meet your host: Eve Menezes Cunningham(1:11) Feel. Love. Heal. – A framework for self-care, Self care and collective care (1:34) People pleasing and survival instincts(2:16) Survival of the kindest(2:36) The science behind Tend and Befriend(4:24) Fawn and Freeze: Trauma in the body(6:22) How early trauma shapes us(7:00) Why we people please (and what we’re really seeking)(8:27) The power of saying No(9:28) Spotting red flags early(9:37) Practising safe boundaries(11:19) Remember: You have the right to autonomy(12:27) Moving from survival to love(13:21) Healing through support and connection(14:54) Learning to honour your preferences(16:29) The Runaway Bride egg question(17:16) It’s never too late to get to know yourself(18:04) Final thoughts and resourcesFULL TRANSCRIPTTend and befriend response. So if you were to imagine being very, very under stress, under threat, and if you think about the most powerful people in society, if you think about like the white men, it's safe for them to fight, it's safe for them to run away. Women, minorities typically have to placate, have to be appealing, have to be pleasant, all these things with tend befriend when it's a trauma response, when it is also very common with ADHD.Hi, you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I'm your host and producer, Eve Menezes Cunningham, and I'm a trauma therapist and survivor and ADHDer, a supervisor, supervisor, supervisor, Self care coach, author and columnist. And you can access full show notes and links and free resources through the feelbettereverydaypodcast.com or selfcarecoaching.net.In this episode, we'll work through my Feel. Love. Heal. Framework.Feel, which is about the active self- care, Love, which is about that uppercase Self S for the highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant, miraculous part of yourself. And the Heal element is the collective care.We're talking about the “tend and befriend” stress response today. I was interviewed for a UK national paper recently and the interview went 45 minutes, and which was longer than I think either of us were expecting. And I still have so much more to say, I thought I'd do a podcast episode about it. (I’ll share the link when it’s published.)Tend and befriend is something that can lead to people pleasing. And when we say people pleasing, no one's like, “Woohoo, I'm a people pleaser.”There's some judgment there. There's some, like high functioning codependency again, a bit tend befriend even. It's how humans survived.Everyone knows most people know about Darwin's idea about survival of the fittest. But it's also that caring, that empathy that has kept humanity going all these, however long humanity has kept going. Typically, so Shelley Taylor coined the term “tend and befriend.”And where Herbert, no, Walter B Cannon identified the Stress Response, the Fight Flight Response. Later, Herbert B. Benson identified the Relaxation Response and the opposite in terms of the parasympathetic activation of the nervous system in that same Harvard lab. Shelley Taylor in 2000 identified this Tend and Befriend response.So if you were to imagine being very, very under stress, under threat, and if you think about the most powerful people in society, if you think about like the white men, it's safe for them to fight, it's safe for them to run away.Women, minorities, typically have to placate, have to be appealing, have to be pleasant. All these things with tend befriend, when it's a trauma response, when it is also very common with ADHD, we're masking a lot of allies, we often don't know ourselves, we have it.We just think we override how we're feeling in order to accommodate the needs of others. I hope that this episode will help you have more compassion for any people pleasing tendencies and recognising that the Tend and Befriend response, where it's a trauma response, where it's out of a sense of fear, even though you might consciously have nothing to be afraid of, your nervous system may have been wired to immediately go into offering more than actually genuinely feels good for yourself. We're going to work through some ways.You might also be interested in the Fawn Response, which again, it's a kind of blamey word, but I know when I first came across Peter Levine's work like 15 years ago, I think, in Waking the Tiger, and he talked about the impala, and how it would play dead when it sensed the lion.And after the danger had gone, it would get up, shake it off and get on with its day. I used to shake uncontrollably as a teenager, I would sometimes have to stand against walls because I would shake so much. I didn't know then it was a trauma release. When I did my yoga therapy training, and some of the people were doing TRE training as well. I know a lot of people know that kind of is basically learning how to shake it off me personally, not for me, because I shook so much already. But it is connecting with the body, it's letting it go.The fawn response is that dorsal vagal collapse we've talked about in the Purr! Hiss! Freeze! episode. You might want to go back to and other episodes as well. I'll link in the show notes.And it's really about recognising that whether you recognise you sometimes going to Tend and Befriend or Fawn, or people pleasing or high functioning co-dependency. It's all just adaptive survival. You are here now, you have survived.You get to watch this or listen to this and choose for yourself moving forward, what do you want to do? That bit of awareness will help you. And when I say like Fight Flight, people generally aren't delighted with themselves after they've fought or after they've fled.But when things are stressful, we tend to fall back into those ways in which we were wired, the ways in which we kept ourselves safe, when we potentially didn't even have language, some of this conditioning is pre verbal, it's so young.Especially with complex PTSD, interpersonal trauma, you think about babies who would have been abandoned or neglected and had to learn to be extra appealing in order to survive, like if their parents were unable to care for them properly.They didn't know that they were utterly divine and deserving of all the love and care in the world. They grew up believing they were too much. And so we're wired to thrive when we feel safe, welcome and loved. We need that safety and connection. People pleasing can be a way of trying to get that. It's also a way of denying it. Because if we're working from a trauma response, if we're living from a trauma response, we're not showing our whole selves if we're so viscerally terrified of being abandoned.Abandonment would have meant death when we were little, and also for our ancient ancestors as adults. It's not about shame or judgement, it's just having reasons and extra compassion for yourself so that you can recognise that the reconditioning can be challenging, it can be an advanced practice, and it's very much worth it.If you see yourself in this, give yourself a mental hug right now. Your nervous system was conditioned this way. And again, it helped you survive, you can learn to heal it, you can learn to rewire it with practice. It's retraining yourself to seek and find safety with the people you can express your whole self with.There was a gorgeous post that I've been telling quite a few people about recently. I can't remember who to credit, if you know, please let me know so that I can credit them. It was something about going on a first date and saying no to something before she met up with any potential man.Nope, like no explanation, no excuses, just, “Nope, can't do Wednesday, how about Thursday?”And a lot of the men in the comments got angry, “Why is she testing us?” And it's like, this is how deep the conditioning goes that women and other minority groups are supposed to be available and appeasing and not make a fuss and low maintenance and all these things.For the woman who said this is her technique, it was basically showing red flags. If a stranger isn't going to hear your no before you've met them, if they're going to demand an excuse or a reason for something...

JOIN ME (AND OTHERS) FOR THE LIVING AND WORKING WITH NEURODIVERGENCE CONFERENCE ON 10th OCTOBER. I’ll be presenting Cattitude: A Polyvagal Informed Approach to Self and Self-Care for ADHD and Trauma and you can book hereEPISODE 76Do you constantly forget your accomplishments while ruminating on what’s gone wrong? You might be experiencing "success amnesia" - the tendency for trauma survivors and ADHDers to completely forget positive achievements while remembering every mistake.In this episode of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, I (trauma therapist and ADHDer, Eve Menezes Cunningham) explain why success amnesia is so common in ADHD brains and share a simple daily practice to counter it.Learn how to build authentic confidence by remembering what you've actually accomplished, even the small things. Using my Feel. Love. Heal framework, I share how to:Recognise and welcome your current feelings without judgmentConnect with your inherent worth beyond achievementsUse success tracking to support your efforts at collective care and empowermentThis isn't about fake positivity - it's about training your brain to remember the full picture of who you are and what you've done. Perfect for anyone struggling with low self-esteem, imposter syndrome, or feeling "not enough."Timestamps, resources, and show notes available hereFeel Better Every Day!Learn from the Self (for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself) and self-care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes I (your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) share trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas through the lens of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework to help you:• Feel. Regulate your nervous system, work with your energy and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from• Love. Accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and• Heal. Collective care to turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at largeThanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get an exclusive deeper dive (these include bonus interviews, EFT Tap Alongs, yoga poses, breath practices, journal prompts and more) each week.WANT TO WORK WITH ME?• There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos• All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices• You can join the Sole to Soul Circle and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme• If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can• Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision).WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA?You can find me almost everywhere. Say "Hi" and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunningham@rescuecattitude@thefeelbettereverydaypodcastFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDayTikTok @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcAnd if you’d like to leave a ***** review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.CHAPTERS(0:00) Countering Success Amnesia(0:39) Welcome to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast(1:25) The Feel. Love. Heal. Framework(3:04) Autumn Equinox and International Day of Peace(3:27) What Is Success Amnesia?(5:27) Why Acknowledging Your Achievements Matters(6:23) Feel: Active Self-care and Processing Emotions(10:28) Love: Accepting Yourself as Enough(12:38) Heal: Collective Care and Post-traumatic Growth(14:34) A Daily Practice to Overcome Success Amnesia(16:18) Coming Up Next Week: Tend and BefriendDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTAs in, I'm going to recommend a daily practice you can do to counter “success amnesia”. It's a wonderful way for building confidence in a really authentic way. It's not like, “Wow, I'm brilliant!” or anything like that.It's just like, “Oh, wow! I did these things today that I had forgotten. And, yeah, that makes sense as to why I was working late or why I was tired or why...” Whatever it might be, it's helping you take a breath, pause before you move on to the next thing and how you need to just do, do, do, do.Hi, you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I'm your host and producer, Eve Menezes Cunningham. I'm a trauma therapist and survivor, a clinical supervisor and supervisor's supervisor. An author, columnist, self-care coach, where I integrate the psychosynthesis counselling, the yoga therapy, EFT, NLP, crystals and more, NLP. And I'm also an ADHD-er.And I'm also Rainbow Magnificat's human. She was really shy for all the cat episodes, but here she is now.Every Tuesday, I share new episodes of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. And in each episode, I go through whatever the theme is, using my Feel. Love. Heal. Framework. This makes it something that's accessible for yourself to work with. Whatever you're working with. The Feel element is to do with active self-care. That's that lowercase s, self-care.The Love is the acceptance, the connection with Divine Love, loving yourself and recognising you are part of the divine. That connecting with your miraculous Self, that highest, truest, wisest, the uppercase S. That remembering you don't need to do a thing. You're already enough. You're not too much. You're worthy. You're lovable. You're part of the divine. You're all made of stardust. Connecting with that around whatever issue you're facing, it can help you.I don't know if you can see little Rainy here. Connecting with that divinity within yourself and everyone can be really transformative and a peaceful way of going through life.The Heal element is the collective care. The co-regulation. The, when you've had enough time to deal with things, to let yourself just be, to regulate all those things. It can be then that post-traumatic growth, that co-regulation. The looking into ways to turn what's hurting your heart into a way to improve things for yourself, your family, your communities, the world at large.For today's episode, episode 76, we're celebrating the Autumn Equinox, a time of balance and harmony, on the 21st September. We're also celebrating the International Day of Peace.That might sound quite strange because of everything that's going on in the world so I'm going to share a resourcing technique today around “success amnesia”.Of all the things I've learned as an ADHDer, the term “success amnesia” explains my entire life. And like kind of having low self-esteem for so long and self-loathing for so long and all the rest of it. And then realising how that is so common with ADHD and trauma, with working memory issues. We can do good stuff and completely forget it. I forgot I wrote a book. I've forgotten I've edited journals. I've forgotten columns. I've forgotten huge pieces of work or other things that were tough in life. Success amnesia is the phrase that explains why it's so prevalent for ADHDers.By working with your own success amnesia, and I'll share some ways in this episode, it can not only boost your own self-esteem and confidence, or at least start chipping away at some of that self-loathing and internalised ableism, but it can also empower you to feel better, able to speak up, to help others. To navigate so much of the insanity we're facing in the world and things that we thought everyone had

Celebrating 21 years as a professional writer and in practice, I (Self care coach, supervisor and trauma therapist, Eve Menezes Cunningham) share 21 lessons I've learned in hopes of saving you years or even decades in your own trauma and ADHD recovery journey.From my early days discovering "you're not broken" to advanced insights about nervous system regulation and embodied healing, I reveal what really works (and what doesn't), why your body's wisdom trumps any technique, how trauma healing can be gentle, and why following your life force is the ultimate GPS.These aren't just textbook theories. Whether you're a practitioner, on your own healing journey, or simply curious about what actually creates lasting change, this anniversary episode offers ideas to help you transform how you approach your own self-care, wellbeing and personal growth. And, if you have one, your own practice.FULL TRANSCRIPTIt might be joy, it might be gratitude, it might be anger, it might be pain, it might be sadness, it might be jangly anxiety, it could be anything at all, but the more you get into the habit of connecting with your life force, connecting with your energy, connecting with your charge, connecting with your prana, your chi, it makes everything much easier.You don't need all the theory, you don't need all the tools, all you need to do is connect with yourself and ask yourself, what do I need? What will help me right now? What am I feeling? What is that an indication of?And it becomes a beautiful, exciting language, learning your own body, learning your own energy.Hi, you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and I'm your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham.To find out more about the podcast, access free resources, find out different ways in which we might work together, events coming up, the book, full show notes for each of the episodes, including transcripts and links, you can go to thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com or selfcarecoaching.net and let me know if you've got any questions.There's a lot there, but I hope that all the resources are easily accessible for you. Whether or not you get in touch with me there's loads and loads you can do yourself. And with that in mind, I want to start today's episode, which is celebrating my 21st business birthday today.And essentially, you don't need me or anyone else to remember how to trust yourself. That being said, I can help. I love doing these podcast episodes. I love sharing through my writing, through all the different ways in which I work, sharing some of the things that have helped me as well as many of the things that I work with in my private practice and with groups. Because we have access to a world of resources and ancient wisdom being proved by modern neuroscience.We have so much available to us. And I thought with that in mind, I would share 21 of my lessons and blessings from 21 years in business. I hope it helps you, but I also never want you to forget that you already have everything you need within you.You don't need me. You don't need anyone else. And what we listen to, what we watch, what we pay attention to, it helps us. It can, where we put our attention has quite a big impact. So I am hoping that my work does help you, even if we've never met or I've never heard from you.1) I want to start with number one, which is something I wish I'd known when I was starting out. I had a suspicion and everything I initially trained with was to save my own life. But the fact that you're not broken, no matter how much your trauma history or your ADHD brain tries to convince you otherwise, you are not broken. You are worthy. You are lovable. You're not too much and you are enough and you deserve all the goodness life has to offer. So if you stop listening now, I hope you remember that.2) I've made a note of Cheryl Richardson, who was, she still is one of my favourite authors. She was booed on Oprah decades ago for having the temerity to suggest that the audience should be taking care of themselves. She kind of popularised the idea of self-care and yeah, she was booed by lots of mums who had been conditioned to say, No. Now, everyone talks about the oxygen mask and on an aeroplane, you sort yours first, you make sure you're OK. You can breathe before you look after any dependents. Great.Of course, everyone wants to make sure that other people are safe as well. But I want you to also consider the fact that you, even if you don't have dependents, even if you're just getting your oxygen mask for yourself, you are worthy. I love Cheryl Richardson's approach and she was an enormous inspiration to me early on.I wouldn't have believed that I'd still be doing this and I'd be loving it even more 21 years later. But I just had a bit of a flicker of the light behind. So yeah, easily distracted ADHD brain.She is such a gentle presence. Her books are so lovely. And I think for me, even though she was on Oprah, and obviously I was starting out as a coach and complimentary therapist back in 2004, it was her gentle approach. I didn't have the words for it then, therapeutic coaching. And I trained as a coach before I trained as a therapist. So I wasn't doing that yet.It became what I call self-care coaching. Where I integrate all my offerings, including the yoga, the NLP, the EFT, all of it. But back then she was the only one who... I thought I knew that my coaching was working. I knew it was helping me. I knew it was helping my clients. But when you'd see coaches in the public eye back then, they tended to be very Tony Robbins, who I also love, but very much not my vibe. So yeah, I just wanted to name her as an enormous lesson and blessing.And also Martha Beck, who I later got to interview, which remains one of my favourite interviews, but just their gentleness and their wisdom. And I'm not suggesting that the more dynamic coaches weren't like that. But I think Martha Beck also was my introduction into working with the body long before I actually started working with the body, because...This is Mighty Meadbh. I don't know if she's going to say Hello.I remember her having me and other people in the group identify a really simple, basic way, I'll go into it with the Sole to Soul Circle. To just listen to the body's wisdom, which is always there. This was before I trained as a yoga therapist, before I did any of the somatic work that I do, but it was a real revelation.So definitely there.3) And that's what I'm saying, really, when I say number three, you know yourself best, you can trust yourself, you may well have, especially with trauma, especially with ADHD, have been conditioned into believing that you need outside information and outside dictators, like kind of didactic, telling you what to do, how to do everything. Learning how other people have done it can be really helpful, checklists, body doubling, all sorts of things, all of this can be really helpful.But you don't need it, you know yourself, you know what feels good, you know what doesn't. And the more I've learned, and the more... can you hear her purr?The more I understand about the nervous system and Polyvagal Theory and how we're wired to thrive when we feel safe, welcome and loved. And with trauma, with ADHD, you may well have been conditioned out of it, but it's never too late to relearn, to notice what feels good, move towards that, what doesn't, move away from that.4) Feel Better Every Day. I liked the name because it had my name in it, Eve, and it just felt positive.But I was always careful to avoid toxic positivity, encouraging people to welcome the full emotional landscape. And recognising it's a bit like when you go to the gym, or if you're doing anything fitness-related. As we build muscle, we're breaking muscle down. With personal development work, with trauma recovery, with the Self Care Coaching, with befriending your ADHD brain, a lot of the time you'll feel better after watching a video, or listening to a podcast, or doing one of the exercises I shared, or for people who work with me one-to-one or in groups. But it's not always the case. Healing isn't linear.It's not like Woohoo! But I think for me, even knowing that I was learning things that were helping me enjoy life and want to be alive, Feel Better Every Day just felt like a lovely name.5) Following your life force, your charge, your prana, your chi. Again, it's so body-based, and it's energy-based, and it's recognising, in any given moment, where you feel most alive. And it might be joy, it might be gratitude, it might be anger, it might be pain, it might be sadness, it might be jangly anxiety. It could be anything at all.But the more you get into the habit of connecting with your life force, connecting with your energy, connecting with your charge, connecting with your prana, your chi, it makes everything much easier.You don't need all the theory. You don't need all the tools. All you need to do is connect with yourself and ask yourself, what do I need? What will help me right now? What am I feeling? What is that an indication of? And it becomes a beautiful, exciting language, learning your own body, learning your own energy.6) The embodiment, the embodied wellbeing element. And I think it was a huge lesson and blessing to learn that it was safe for me to be in my body. Like I say, all the things I trained in initially, they were to help me.Start however small you need. There's a lovely exercise around it. You might start with an

In this episode, I (trauma-therapist, supervisor, Self care coach and author, Eve Menezes Cunningham) share how I transformed (and continue working with it) my inner critic using my rescue cats and better understanding of how trauma and ADHD affect the brain as inspiration. From 21 years of helping others, I reveal some simple shifts that have really helped.✨ Key takeaways:• Replace harsh self-talk with gentle "Evie Cat" (well, your equivalent) moments• Remember, you're not stupid - you just have ADHD or trauma! Challenge that internalised ableism!!!• Progress over purrfection, always• Find people who've "harvested their own shame" for supportWhether you're navigating ADHD, trauma, or just being human, this episode offers practical tools for treating yourself with the compassion you, just like everybody else, deserve.#SelfCompassion #ADHD #TraumaHealing #MentalHealth #SelfCare #InnerCritic #Therapy #Mindfulness #FeelBetterEveryDayFeel Better Every Day! Learn from the Self (for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself) and self-care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas through the lens of the Feel. Love. Heal. framework to help you:• Feel. Regulate your nervous system, work with your energy and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from• Love. Accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and• Heal. Collective care to turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at largeThanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get an exclusive deeper dive (these include bonus interviews, EFT Tap Alongs, yoga poses, breath practices, journal prompts and more) each week.WANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision).WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say "Hi" and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunningham @rescuecattitude @thefeelbettereverydaypodcastFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDay TikTok @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcAnd if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from. CHAPTERS(0:21) Introduction to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast(1:33) A Mistaken Date and Self-compassion(3:15) ADHD and Challenging Internalised Labels(4:36) The Feel. Love. Heal. Framework(5:03) Feel: Kinder Self-talk and Emotional Release(8:05) Love: Radical Self-acceptance and Rest(9:36) Heal: Co-regulation and Compassion for Others(12:03) Closing Reflections and ResourcesDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTThat make you feel like you have to DO in order to be worthy. You're already worthy. You're already lovable. You're already brilliant. And the more you love yourself, the more compassion you have for yourself, the more you will be able to connect with your resourcefulness, the more you'll be able to create, connect with your creativity.Hi, you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I'm your host and producer Eve Menezes Cunningham. For 21 years next week, I've been running Feel Better Every Day (previously under different names, but for the past nearly 10 years, I don't know the exact years, but) Feel Better Every Day with Eve Menezes Cunningham (aka selfcarecoaching.net): Self care coaching, trauma-informed therapies and clinical supervision.I'm also an author and columnist and I love sharing in these episodes. And today's is an unexpected one. My hair's still wet from swimming, but I hadn’t thought I'd be recording today. I was up late last night editing an extended episode for my 21st business birthday around lessons I've learnt in the hope that it will help you learn faster.I've spent decades, for my own healing and in professional practice, so by sharing these things, the intention is that you don't have to do things the hard way like I did.Speaking of the hard way, it got to about one o'clock in the morning and I suddenly realised my business birthday is the 9th of September, not the 2nd of September. So I'm way ahead having done so much editing on next week's episode, but I had nothing for today!Obviously my immediate thought was, “Evie Cat!” But that alone is such huge progress because I would have spent most of my life beating myself up. For more about Evie Cat and using cats to help you feline better every day, working with Polyvagal Theory, you can go to selfcarecoaching.net/feline and listen to the cat episodes of the podcast.But that, seriously, is one of the quickest things to do. Talk to yourself more gently. Yes, I was annoyed that it was late at night. Yes, I felt stupid. Yes, I thought I worked so hard to navigate dates and times and all the rest of it, and there I was. I'd missed a week.I very quickly, because of my years and years and years of practice, reminded myself, OK, it's done, I can do another tomorrow. And in Ellyce Fulmore's words, “You're not stupid, you just have ADHD.”I've read so much about ADHD and listened to so many podcasts and audiobooks and done additional trainings the past good few years now, pre-diagnosis and post. Ellyce Fulmore's book, Keeping Finance Personal, is really gorgeous, and throughout it, she has these little statements like, “You're not bad with money, you just have ADHD”, or “You're not ____, you just have ADHD.”It's connecting with all those internalised, ableist, “You're lazy, you're stupid, you're all of this” that we've just taken for granted. Even with the work I'm doing, even with compassion being core to all of it, it's a challenge when you make a silly mistake.The other day, I got my arm caught in the car door, because rather than putting it in the normal way, I put it in... Anyway, I'm constantly being ridiculous, and over the years, I've learnt to be kinder to myself as I do it, so I'm hoping that this episode (Hello, Rainbow!) will help you be kinder to yourself and recognise that whatever mistakes you're making, whatever you're finding challenging, you're not stupid, you just have ADHD, or you just have trauma, and that's absolutely fine.Both impact executive functioning, and you can put supports in place, and I'm hoping that this episode will help you do that. I'm going to start with the feel part of the Feel. Love. Heal. Framework.I've said a bit about some of what I do in terms of the kinder self-talk, the more soothing self-talk, but I want you to encourage yourself to do whatever helps you. For me, Rainbow coming here right now, she is what helped me internalise that more friendly self-talk. Because when she came from the shelter, I wanted her to feel as safe, as secure, as loved as possible, and I had already learnt about Polyvagal Theory.She's nearly 14, and wow, yes, through the trauma-informed yoga training, and talking to her more kindly, it really integrated my talking to myself more kindly. So, again, in the past, it would have been an immediate, “For f***'s sake, but now it's like , “Evie Cat…” And it's still not like, “Woo-hoo! Evie Cat!” but it's a gentler version. Progress, not purrfection, always.Think for yourself who you might imagine talking to. Internalise that for yourself. You might have a gorgeous rescue cat or four, well, technically two, I just still feed the every day. You might have a baby, you might have a lizard, you might have donkeys next door, whatever your situation. Think about a puppy, think about any creature who you know you would not be subjecting to the kind of way in which you talk to yourself.Notice how that feels, and also don't force it, don't force the gentleness.

You were NEVER too much.In episode 73 of Feel Better Every Day Podcast, trauma therapist, author, producer and host Eve Menezes Cunningham shares some of her decades-long journey of Inner Child work.You’ll learn:• Why children with ADHD internalise significantly more criticism and shame• How to identify different Inner Child parts / subpersonalities (playful, creative, curious, wounded)• Eve's recent breakthrough with crisps about feeling "too much" from babyhood and how childhood coping mechanisms shaped her adult patterns• Gentle approaches to Inner Child work that won't overwhelm you• The Feel...Love...Heal framework for Inner Child workYou were never "too much". You were, like all babies, children and adults across this wondrous world we live in, a miraculous child deserving of love and understanding.Whether you're new to Inner Child work or revisiting it with fresh perspective, this episode offers trauma-informed, ADHD-friendly guidance for healing those tender parts of yourself.Feel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you: • Feel... connect with and honour your lifeforce (charge, prana, chi etc), regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from • Love... accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and • Heal... collective care to turn what hurts your heart into action to help heal yourself, your family, organisations, communities and the world at large Thanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each week. RESOURCES• Episode 65 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast• 365 Ways to Feel Better book• the Sole to Soul Circle for deeper explorationConnect with Eve:🌐 thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com📧 selfcarecoaching.netWANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision). WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say "Hi" and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunningham Substack @evemc Bluesky @eveimc TikTok @evemenezescunningham Insta @evemenezescunningham @rescuecattitude @thefeelbettereverydaypodcast Facebook @FeelBetterEveryDay And if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from. DISCLAIMER The content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.CHAPTERS(0:00 - 0:19) Opening: Responsibility for keeping your Inner Child safe(0:20 - 2:15) Introduction to the podcast and resources(2:15 - 4:08) Episode focus: working with Inner Children(4:08 - 6:30) ADHD, trauma, and the impact on Inner Children(6:30 - 8:45) Using photos to represent different Inner Children(8:45 - 11:10) Different types of Inner Children: playful, curious, wounded, needy(11:10 - 12:47) Gentle approach and sharing experiences with Inner Child work(12:48 - 15:50) Personal story: childhood photos and self-loathing v healing(15:50 - 19:30) Reflections on childhood eating, parental limitations and self-compassion(19:30 - 23:10) Accepting joyful and wounded parts of yourself(23:10 - 26:00) Love phase of Feel… Love… Heal…: connecting with Inner Children through journalling and objects(26:00 - 29:10) Heal phase: noticing and supporting Inner Children in yourself and others(29:10 - 32:47) Closing reflections: revisiting Inner Children, self-compassion, and encouragement for continued workFULL TRANSCRIPTYou're taking responsibility for keeping your Inner Child safe. You as the adult have survived and this can be transformational and a lot can come up.Hi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.Every Tuesday I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self with that uppercase S for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself.To help you create a life you don't need to retreat from and feel better every day. You can find out more at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and you can also access information about the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing and all the free resources at selfcarecoaching.net as well as ways in which, if you're interested, each Wednesday the Sole to Soul Circle members get an email and exclusive content which goes into a deeper dive around that week's podcast theme.Today's episode, episode 73, is about working with our Inner Children. Especially with trauma and ADHD, Inner Child work can be painful. I know I've been going through a bunch of old photos and I ended up going with this as my main one to work with.A child of the ‘70s, early ‘80s, in the Circle I'll be going into more depth and sharing some of the ways in which I'm working with photos myself and ways in which members can. It's powerful transformational work. You may well have already done some.This podcast episode is to help you recognise that again with trauma, with ADHD, I can't remember the exact number (ADHD brain) but children growing up with ADHD, because we get things wrong, because we're called careless and told we should be trying harder, it's an enormous amount more criticism that we've internalised than our counterparts who are more neurotypical.And that has an impact on our Inner Children. We grow up with a lot of shame.With trauma recovery there's an enormous amount of shame where we were too little to save ourselves, but we still internalise it.Inner Child work and be transformative and joyful and also really painful. That picture I chose, I hadn't remembered it but I was actually looking for a different picture which I remembered from when I started my Inner Child work more consciously coming up two decades ago and finding a picture of myself at age five or six on a bike in the 1970s/1980s on the cul-de-sac I lived on at the time.When I saw it the other day it was like, “Oh what a sweet little kid!” Because I've done so much Inner Child work.Whereas back then, I was filled with loathing and disgust for her! Like why hadn't she done more to like save herself?If, when I'm saying to you, “You might want to find a photo to represent these different Inner Children for yourself” I'm talking to you not as a one-to-one trauma therapist but through a podcast.I don't know who you are, I don't know where in the world you are and I am trusting you to look after yourself and your Inner Children rather than going too deep and finding it more painful than anything needs to be.Again with trauma, with ADHD, we're used to pain, we're used to things being hard.Inner Child work can be delightful. It can be gentle. It can be so healing but in that not overwhelming cathartic way.Thinking about your different Inner Children, maybe find a picture to represent your...

Do You Have High-functioning Co-dependence?Feeling exhausted despite "having it all together"? You might be trapped in high functioning co-dependence. Especially with trauma and ADHD, we’re so conditioned, from a preverbal age, to ignore our own knowledge, wisdom, wants and needs and prioritise others’. And it’s never too late to step into your power.In this episode, you’ll:· Learn why capable, independent people often ignore their own needs while constantly caring for others· Learn how the "Good Girl" and "Independent Woman" conditioning keeps us from asking for help, accepting support or even knowing what we truly want· Discover practical tools to break free from the cycle of over-giving· Recognize when you're accepting "floor fries" instead of what you deserve and· give yourself permission to know what you know and want what you want without guilt. (Tomorrow’s Sole to Soul Circle special will dive deeper into this).Stop exhausting yourself trying to be lovable. Remember that you already are worthy. Exactly as you are. You’re totally lovable exactly as you are. You’re enough. You’re not too much and the moment you recognise this, everything gets easier.Resources mentioned: Terri Cole (Boundary Boss), Kasia Urbaniak (Unbound), Kara Loewentheil (Unf*** Your Brain) Meggan Watterson (Reveal etc) and Gloria Steinem (Revolution from Within etc)#HighFunctioningCodependence #SelfCare #Boundaries #ADHD #Trauma #WomenEmpowermentFeel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you: • Feel... regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from • Love... accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and • Heal... turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large Thanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each week. WANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision). WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say "Hi" and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunningham Substack Eve Menezes CunninghamBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunningham @rescuecattitude @thefeelbettereverydaypodcast Facebook @FeelBetterEveryDayAnd if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.CHAPTERS(0:00 - 1:42) Opening thoughts on exhaustion and high functioning co-dependence(3:10 - 4:35) Introduction to episode topic and Terri Cole’s definition(4:35 - 5:21) Kasia Urbaniak and the “good girl” and “independent woman”(8:12 - 10:03) Shifting attention away from yourself to the aggressor(13:09 - 15:48) The “smoosh” and losing power in relationships(20:48 - 23:09) Kara Loewentheil’s “floor fries” metaphor(33:38 - 34:55) Gloria Steinem’s toilet training and fascism insightDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTAlso notice the times when you feel exhausted and be honest with yourself about the potential for high functioning co-dependence and is there someone or some area in your life where you're more prone to it, where you feel like you have to do, you have to go along with, you have to, whatever it is, in order to be lovable, in order to be worthy. And just know, even if you have to keep telling yourself, know with every fibre of your being that you already are.Hi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday I share trauma informed and ADHD friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self with that uppercase S for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself.The idea is to help you create a life you don't need to retreat from so you can feel better every day and you can find out more at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com. For deeper dives into each episode, including bonus interviews when they're interview episodes, plus access to a rich archive of exclusive material, including the entire Love Your Whole Self chakra journey, you can join the Sole to Soul Circle and there are other resources like the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing and lots of book bonus videos on the website selfcarecoaching.netAnd lots of other free resources around trauma, ADHD, anxiety, stress, confidence, perimenopause and menopause, self-care for solopreneurs, confidence, I can't remember if I said that, resilience, decolonising yourself, trying to think what I've forgotten, but I've kind of spent a lot of time in the past year or so trying to create more of a library type feel for each of the specialisms to make it much more accessible and easy to use.I hope you find that helpful and do let me know what you'd like more of and if you have any questions. That's selfcarecoaching.net.For today's episode, episode 72, we're looking at high functioning co-dependence and it's a term I learnt from the American author and podcast host, Boundary Boss, Terri Cole.Basically, it also confirms a lot of what Kasia Urbaniak talks about when she talks about the Good Girl and the Independent Woman actually being related. What Terri Cole explains around high functioning co-dependence is you wouldn't think of yourself as a typical codependent person because you're not sitting around weeping and wailing and unable to function.Instead, you're the one who is doing everything for everyone and you seem like you have it all together, but the point is that you're utterly exhausted because so much of your time and energy and attention is on what other people need.I thought I'd explore it a little bit today, but am very much encouraging you to check out Terri Cole's work. She does entire courses around this and she has some really lovely podcast episodes and the book. Kasia Urbaniak is another, like I mentioned, the Good Girl and the Independent Woman.She talks about the Good Girl and how we were all conditioned through thousands of years of patriarchal conditioning, where women condition obviously as well as men, but it's to benefit the patriarchy.Because if anything bad happened to a girl or a woman, because she was blamed, all the kind of shaming around sexuality and clothing and behaviour and very much conditioned to be a good girl, a marriageable girl. It's only relatively recently that women could have their own money, their own credit cards, their own businesses. That is something that might sound familiar, but it's more likely that you'll be like, “Nope! That's not me! I had lots of choices. I was told I could do whatever I wanted, be whatever I wanted.”And this is where she starts talking about the Independent Woman. The Independent Woman sounds like a wonderful thing, but the way she describes it, it's basically, we have created a situation where we are independent, we can do what we want, but it has left us unable to accept help and support and also too scared of feeling too bossy.If you're too much, then it's the “too bossy”. And if you're in Good Girl, it's “too needy”. Kasia used to work as a dominatrix and I've been recommending her work to everyone. She is phenomenal. She also trained for 12 years as a Taoist nun.She was doing a lot of energy work and set up The Academy to support people in finding their power. She works with women because it's women's conditioning that makes our attention go inward when we're under attack. Whether

For Black Cat Appreciation Day this week, we explore how we "other" creatures like sharks and black cats - and how this mirrors the parts of ourselves we reject. Join the Sole to Soul Circle for a live (online) deeper dive into your own shadow on Monday 18th August🖤 Join Eve Menezes Cunningham as she dives into shadow work using the Feel...Love...Heal framework. Inspired by Netflix's "Shark Whisperer" and her own rescue cats (especially Rainbow MagnifiCat), Eve explores how embracing our whole selves (including the parts we've labelled as "monstrous") can transform our relationships and create a more compassionate world.✨ You'll learn:* How projection keeps us from seeing our full humanity* Why we fear powerful parts of ourselves* Gentle approaches to shadow work and self-acceptance* How loving our rejected parts heals our connections with others🔗 Join the Sole to Soul Circle for deeper shadow work exploration🔗 Find more resources at selfcarecoaching.netNext week: High Functioning Co-dependence (Episode 72)#shadowwork #SelfCare #TraumaInformed #ADHDFriendly #Podcast #SelfAcceptance #feelbettereverydayThis episode features special guest appearances from Mighty Meadbh, Eve's rescue cat 🐱Feel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:• Feel... regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from• Love... accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and• Heal... turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at largeThanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each week.WANT TO WORK WITH ME?• There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos.• All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net• You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme.• If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc• Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision).WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA?You can find me almost everywhere – please say "Hi" and share your questions or comments:YouTube @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunningham (and @rescuecattitude and @thefeelbettereverydaypodcast)Facebook @FeelBetterEveryDayAnd if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.CHAPTERS / CATPURRS(0:00 – 0:58) Black cat cameo and podcast intro(0:59 – 11:02) Sharks, shadow work and misunderstood creatures(11:02 – 11:31) Healing through acceptance(11:33 – 13:20) Leaving the world better than you found it(13:20 – 15:18) Shadow work and embracing our power(15:19 – 16:34) Rescue cats, love, and letting it expandDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTLike Marianne Williamson talked about… [pop Marianne Williamson into the Search on my site to read my interview with her]. I think I have a cat behind me. I do, I have a cat right next to me. It's not a black cat, it's Mighty Meadbh, little wondercat. She was the feral mammy who, oh bless her, she's gorgeous. And I othered her, when she appeared in the garden, she was terrorising Rainbow. I didn't know she had all the kittens at the time, but she kept turning up and I was like, oh my god, I can't have any more cats. And then there were 11 cats and I had to deal with them.Hi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to episode 71 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday, I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self with that uppercase S for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself.Ideally, to help you create a life you don't need to retreat from. You can find out more at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and for deeper dives into each week's theme, you can join the Sole to Soul Circle. As well as bonus interviews and practices, there are live circles online and instant access to the whole Love Your Whole Self chakra journey.You might also find the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing, helpful. And other resources available at selfcarecoaching.net.Today's episode, in honour of Black Cat Appreciation Day this week, I was hoping to have a little cameo from Rainbow, but we're going to be talking about sharks, those misunderstood monsters.I recently watched Shark Whisperer on Netflix. If you haven't seen it, I recommend at least giving it a go. I would not have thought it was my kind of programme / documentary at all and I absolutely adored it. Someone close to me really pushed recommending it and I'm so glad I did.It follows Ocean Ramsey as she uses her long history with sharks. From the time she was growing up in Hawaii she wasn't scared. She swims with them and does an enormous amount of work trying to save them from the real monsters on the planet, the humans.Sorry, I don't mean to be down on humans.There are many, many amazing humans, but the point of Black Cat Appreciation Day is that a lot of people malign paw, beautiful black cats as unlucky, as bad somehow, as not photogenic enough. They brought in this day to help rescues place more black cats.Rainbow Magnificat (obviously every day is Rainbow Appreciation Day here) changed my life.Sharks changed Ocean Ramsey's life. The power of connecting with her own energy as she works with theirs and also what she's had to do in life… I'm so happy she found her partner who's equally in love with sharks.For the purpose of this episode, we're not going to be diving with sharks. We're not even going to be swimming with sharks. I've also been watching, what is it? Shark: Celebrity Infested Waters, which again, is aiming to bring awareness.I wish they'd shown more around what they were doing to support contestants with their anxiety and fears. It could be quite educational in that regard as well, but the sharks are amazing.We call sharks monsters. I don't, but a lot of people hate sharks. They won't swim in the ocean. They're scared because we've been taught to fear them. They've been othered.Unfortunately, we live in a time where many, many, many groups of people and individuals are othered for things they have no control over. The more we own our whole shadows, the more we can bring about a more peaceful way of life for all who come into contact with us by not projecting our fears and our monstrous parts onto others.Start by asking yourself, have you ever really, really, really not liked someone?And it might be like absolutely loads of people you really don’t like, or it might be, “Oh, I'm not supposed to dislike people.”The more we can work with the parts of ourselves that don't like someone and own those parts we're projecting out onto them back in ourselves, we can create beautiful friendships. We can really transform things.But if we just let ourselves dismiss politicians, people, like entire groups of people as completely monstrous, we're dehumanising ourselves. We're all complex. We're all worthy of love and safety and shelter and all good things.I want you to think about how you feel about addressing your shadow. As we move into the feel, part of the Feel... Love... Heal... framework, do you consider black cats to be bad luck? Do you consider sharks to be monsters?Think of something you dislike or someone you dislike or even hate and just ask yourself how it feels to contemplate the possibility that what you hate within them or what you dislike or what you fear in them is within yourself.We're going to be doing a deeper dive into shadow work on Monday the 18th for Sole to Soul Circle...

🐱 What if the secret to better self-care was as simple as being more cat?In this special International Cat Day episode of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, Eve Menezes Cunningham shares how her rescue cat, Rainbow MagnifiCat transformed not just her life, but her entire approach to trauma-informed self-care and nervous system healing.Whether you love cats or just need permission to prioritise what feels good, this episode will help you reconnect with your innate wisdom and give yourself more of the curiosity, love and care you deserve.You'll discover:Some of the connections between Polyvagal Theory and Feline Better Every DayHow speaking gently to your cat can heal your inner criticThe "Purr! Hiss! Freeze!" method for mapping your nervous system statesHow cats can help humans improve self-worth and boundary settingPractical ways to find ventral vagal (Purr!) moments of safety and connectionHow to break free from conditioning that works against your natural instinctsPurrfect for you if:✓ You struggle with harsh self-talk or inner criticism✓ You're interested in trauma-informed, ADHD-friendly self-care✓ You want to understand your nervous system better✓ You're ready to embrace your authentic self (like cats do naturally!)✓ You love cats and want to learn from their unapologetic confidenceEve has been using rescue cats to help people befriend their nervous systems for over 13 years. In this episode, she shares how imagining yourself as a beloved cat can help you heal your nervous system.Key takeaways:Cats know their worth without needing external validationGentle tone of voice impacts how safe we feel (with ourselves and others)Micro-moments of feeling good build up to heal your nervous systemYou can map your own nervous system Feel Better Every Day!Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:• Feel... regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from• Love... accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing and• Heal... turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large.Thanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each week.WANT TO WORK WITH ME?• There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos.• All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net• You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack https://evemc.substack.com and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme.• If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc• Find out more about my private practice for one to one work. If you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision).WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA?You can find me almost everywhere – please say "Hi" and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunningham Substack @evemc Bluesky @eveimc TikTok @evemenezescunningham Insta @evemenezescunningham Facebook @FeelBetterEveryDayIf you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.CHAPT-PURRS(0:00 - 1:26) Talking kindly to cats (and ourselves)(1:27 - 5:19) Introducing the episode and Be More Cat(5:20 - 9:18) Map your nervous system with your equivalent of Purr! Hiss! Freeze!(9:18 - 13:17) Conditioning, connection and ventral vagal moments(13:18 - 14:29) Bringing that glorious cat energy into the world(14:29 - 16:57) Media training your nervous system and self-expression(16:58 - 17:26) Final thoughts and next week’s episode for Black Cat Appreciation Day: SHARKS!RESOURCESFull show notes and exclusive content: https://selfcarecoaching.net/blog  Deeper dive content: Join the Sole to Soul Circle https://evemc.substack.comBook: "365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing"More on cats and the nervous system (including Purr! Hiss! Freeze! and Smelly Cat episodes) at https://selfcarecoaching.net/felineDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.#BeMoreCat #TraumaInformed #SelfCare #PolyvagalTheory #NervousSystem #ADHD #RescueCats #SelfCompassion #Mindfulness #Healing #PurrHissFreezeBe More Cat, Trauma Informed, Self Care, Polyvagal Theory, Nervous System, ADHD, Rescue Cats, Self Compassion, Mindfulness, Healing, Purr! Hiss! Freeze!

In this Episode 69, I share my unfiltered daily video diaries from the first 8 days starting ADHD medication (Tyvense 30mg, then 40mg). After getting diagnosed in August 2024 and waiting months due to required cardiology tests, I finally began this journey during a particularly stressful time (seriously sick loved one). I share: Day-by-day honest experiences, including the "cheating at life" feeling on dayPractical challenges like figuring out breakfast and protein timing Wins: You know, the little things like leaving the house without forgetting anything, tackling months of bookkeeping without tearsThe grief and wonder of experiencing what a "normal" brain feels like Tips for breakfast solutions and managing expectations How it affected my yoga nidra and physical yoga practices and meditation andWhy proper rest matters for the medication to work This isn't medical advice. It's my lived experience, shared to help demystify the process for others considering ADHD medication. Everyone's journey is different, but I hope this helps you feel more informed and less alone. Next week: How cats can help make everything better (it's International Cat Day!) RESOURCES • The Feel Better Every Day Podcast • Sole to Soul Circle (bonus content & deeper dives) • Book: 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing Always consult your healthcare provider about medication decisions. This is purely my personal experience. Some relevant posts: https://selfcarecoaching.net/2023/07/31/happy-lughnasadh/ https://selfcarecoaching.net/2019/08/01/happy-lughnasadh-what-are-you-harvesting/ https://selfcarecoaching.net/2025/01/07/2025-is-so-last-week-how-do-you-hope-to-be-living-and-feeling-this-time-next-year/ https://selfcarecoaching.net/2025/02/04/some-self-compassion-around-my-own-journey-with-mental-health-issues/ Feel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you: • Feel… (regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from) • Love… (accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing) and • Heal… (turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large) Thanks for watching or listening. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each Wednesday morning. WANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • While my private practice for one to one work (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision) is almost always at capacity, if you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s still worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together. WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say “Hi” and share your questions or comments: And if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from. DISCLAIMER The content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice. Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.Chapters and timestamps(0:00 – 2:06) Intro – self-care, Sole to Soul Circle, book, and podcast overview(2:07 – 2:50) ADHD and creativity – not feeling ashamed of doing many things(2:52 – 6:29) Starting ADHD medication – nervousness and high hopes(6:30 – 10:05) Day one reflections – “cheating at life” and immediate impact(12:33 – 16:41) Accounting wins – numbers, memory and streamlining admin(16:42 – 16:57) Breakfast – ADHD morning routine challenges(19:06 – 25:00) Systems, euphoria and grief – realising how hard it’s been(27:36 – 27:50) Catching up on months of financial admin(27:51 – 28:07) Feeling the effects wear off(28:08 – 28:38) Yoga, cats and less weirdness on day two(28:39 – 29:06) Working on a Saturday and feeling fine(29:07 – 29:26) Clarifying this is my personal experience(29:27 – 30:18) Day three: an early start and protein first thing(30:38 – 31:11) Chips, vegetables and concern about the drive home(31:12 – 31:39) Medication and navigating very little sleep(31:40 – 32:07) Reflecting on the impact and feeling grateful(33:31 – 33:55) Realising how much time I’ve wasted(33:56 – 34:18) Psychiatrist advice and overscheduling ADHD brains(34:19 – 34:47) Looking forward to Monday and letting go of tasks(34:48 – 36:02) Yoga nidra: appreciating stillness, not rushing(36:03 – 36:42) Day four: I am not a squirrel!(36:43 – 37:25) Oat milkshake breakfasts and fridge temperature issues(37:26 – 38:22) Appetite, body image and cultural pressures(40:27 – 41:04) A new stillness at the end of yoga nidra(41:05 – 41:48) Day five: oat milkshake breakfast and smooth transitions(43:06 – 43:33) Hunger, timing and realising it is working(43:34 – 43:57) Committing to sleep and amplifying self-care(43:58 – 44:37) Day six: late start, no clients and writing struggles(44:38 – 45:09) Yoga nidra still helps, with or without medication(45:10 – 45:34) Loved ones noticing improvement(45:35 – 46:08) Day seven: sea swimming and breakfast adjustments(46:09 – 46:30) Medication working better with proper food(46:31 – 46:55) Day eight: higher dose and feeling the difference(46:56 – 47:24) Prioritising proper rest and feeling grateful(47:25 – 47:50) Breakfast rebellion and experimenting with protein(47:51 – 48:24) Wrapping up: encouragement and medical caveats(48:25 – 49:00) Bonus content for Sole to Soul Circle members(49:01 – 54:04) Next week: how cats make everything betterFULL TRANSCRIPTAnd again, I was thinking maybe it's not working, but I know the importance of breakfast now. So I had a protein bar with the tablet, first thing.Hi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham, and you're listening to episode 69 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast.Every Tuesday, I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self, that uppercase S for that highest, wisest, truest, most brilliant, joyful, miraculous part of yourself.The idea is to help you create a life you don't need to retreat from. And you can find out more at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com.For deeper dives into each week's theme, you can join the Sole to Soul Circle for bonus interviews, practices and rituals, plus access to a rich archive, including the Love Your Whole Self Chakra Journey.And you can also find out more in the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing. And I have lots of other resources on the website, selfcarecoaching.net. In today's episode, it's a bit of a different episode to normal. I did a bit of a video diary a few weeks ago when I started my ADHD medication.Today is Lughnasadh and it's a Celtic Wheel of the Year celebration of harvest. And harvest is my word for 2025. And it's been really...

Feeling suicidal? Worried about someone you love? This episode, inspired by an interview I did for BACP, explores how to navigate life's darkest moments with compassion and practical support.It covers:• A recent NHS survey finding that 1 in 4 people have felt suicidal (and why it's likely more)• How working with your body can help lift you out of despair• What to say (and not say) when someone is struggling• Creating a world worth living in - for yourself and othersIf you're struggling right now, please remember you deserve help. You deserve joy. You deserve to not just stay alive but to thrive.This is episode 68 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast - trauma-informed and VAST/ADHD-friendly Self and self-care to help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from.💜 You matter. Your life matters. You're not alone.Feel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:• Feel Better (regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from)• Be Better (accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing) and• Do Better (turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large)Thanks for watching. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each Wednesday morning.WANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • While my private practice for one to one work (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision) is almost always at capacity, if you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s still worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together.WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say ‘Hi’ and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunninghamFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDay And if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from. CHAPTERS(0:02 – 1:13) Introduction to the episode and podcast(1:14 – 2:32) Suicidal thoughts are more common than you think(2:33 – 4:00) Personal experience with suicidal thoughts(4:01 – 5:18) Systemic factors and lack of support(5:19 – 6:38) Why “just talk to someone” isn’t always easy(6:39 – 7:32) You are worthy of help and support(7:33 – 8:44) Simple physical actions to shift your state(10:15 – 11:33) Acceptance and sitting with painful emotions(12:46 – 13:56) Let yourself dream of something better(13:57 – 15:10) Noticing everyday acts of kindness(15:11 – 16:14) Being part of a solution without pressure(16:15 – 17:24) Journaling and energetic support practices(17:25 – 18:18) Suicide in stories and lived experiences(18:19 – 18:54) EncouragementRESOURCES• Samaritans helpline Samaritans.org/ireland• Pieta House (Ireland) pieta.ie• textaboutit.ie/suicide • Mood lifting and heart-opening yoga poses at selfcarecoaching.net/book• Join the Sole to Soul Circle: evemc.substack.comCrisis Support: If you're having suicidal thoughts, please reach out immediately to your local emergency services, GP or crisis helpline.DISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTHi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to episode 68 of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self with that uppercase S, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself to help you create a life you don't need to retreat from.You can find out more at the feelbettereverydaypodcast.com and you can get deeper dives by joining the Sole to Soul Circle as well as bonus interviews, practices, rituals and access to a rich archive including the entire Love Your Whole Self chakra journey.You can also access resources via the book 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas and all the book bonus videos and whether you have the book or not and lots of other resources at selfcarecoaching.net.Today's episode was inspired by an interview I recently did for BACP's website and the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy.They were exploring some of the NHS's recent findings around mental health to coincide with the launch of their 10-year plan and one in four people have reported feeling suicidal at some point over their lifetime.Unfortunately from my experience and from like my lived experience and my professional experience this feels like under-reporting and there's so much going on in the world that has so many people stretched so thin not to mention, I don't want to list all the things that might make you feel worse, feel better every day, but unfortunately way too many people do feel suicidal and have felt suicidal.Myself, I used to feel suicidal a lot throughout my childhood and teens and into my 20s but because I tried when I was 14 and thankfully I didn't succeed I'm always grateful for that because long before I learned how to teach mindfulness it gave me that visceral experience of being grateful that my actions hadn't been irreversible and now with what I understand about trauma recovery and ADHD and impulsivity who would have thought it would take until nearly 50 to find out I was impulsive but thinking it used to really scare me growing up. How it could feel so desperate and like it was the only way out and I was so lucky in many, many ways. I had a good life in many, many ways but that was a default well-worn neural pathway loop that I would regularly go down and it terrified me that something done so quickly could be it forever.And I don't know what the answer is because there aren't enough resources for the people who I was going to say have the courage to seek support. Everyone has courage. It's not just about seeking support. It can be heartbreaking to hear about people who have gone to their GPs and been turned away and it takes so much to reach out, I always feel terrible when I can't help someone who is reaching out wanting me to work with them one-to-one because I'm in private practice I can't work with everyone who gets in touch with me.I really wish that in Ireland and in the UK we had better safety nets in place, better supports to refer people on to, but at the same time I think that there is awareness. I think what they're saying they plan to do in terms of additional resources it's moving hopefully in the right direction but thinking like there's never really any exploration of systemic causes and how people feel about for example the climate catastrophe about what's going on in the world and how that can exacerbate feelings of helplessness and hopelessness.And I guess for the Feel… element of the Feel… Love… Heal… framework, it's too easy to say, “Talk to someone! Reach out! Let someone know you're suffering!” Because when you're suffering like that, that's the last thing you want to do.It can feel utterly impossible to voice it. It can feel melodramatic. It can feel not enough. It can feel terrifying and like fear of rejection. There are all sorts of things that can get in the way and there aren't enough supports in place. There is in Ireland there's Pieta House. You can reach out there. There are the Samaritans in most places.But people need to know that they are WORTHY. People need to know that however you're feeling, you deserve help. And unfortunately, when we're feeling like that, we don't believe that we deserve help. We feel like we're too...

I started this podcast to show the gulf between self-care professionals' ideal and actual self-care.When life hits you with unexpected challenges, how do you maintain your wellbeing? In this episode of the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, trauma-informed therapist Eve Menezes Cunningham shares practical strategies for creating an emergency self-care plan using emojis - perfect for those with ADHD and trauma backgrounds.Drawing from real-life experience during a family crisis, Eve breaks down her Feel-Love-Heal framework into manageable emergency practices:✨ FEEL: Active self-care that regulates your nervous system (even when time is limited) 💝 LOVE: Self-compassion practices and giving yourself grace during tough times🌱 HEAL: Finding meaning and potential growth, even in crisisKey takeaways include paring down your self-care routine to essentials, maintaining flexibility in your schedule and creating visual emoji reminders for when your executive functioning is even more compromised than the usual trauma recovery and ADHD brain challenges.If you’re navigating difficult times or wanting to prepare an emergency self-care toolkit for the future, I hope you’ll find this useful. Feel free to share with someone who might benefit.🎧 More resources at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com 📚 Book: "365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing"Feel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:• Feel Better (regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from)• Be Better (accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing) and• Do Better (turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large)Thanks for watching/listening. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each Wednesday morning.WANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • While my private practice for one to one work (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision) is almost always at capacity, if you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s still worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together.WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say ‘Hi’ and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunninghamFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDay And if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from. CHAPTERS(0:02 – 0:55) Introduction to the podcast and episode(0:56 – 1:46) Why emergency self-care matters(1:47 – 2:48) ADHD, trauma and crisis mode focus(2:49 – 3:45) Navigating uncertainty with self-care(3:46 – 4:28) Executive function struggles in emergencies(4:29 – 5:50) The power of short practices(9:31 – 10:32) Letting go of non-essentials and pressure(10:33 – 11:12) Self-talk and nervous system care(11:13 – 11:53) Being human and allowing emotion(11:54 – 12:33) Thinking ahead with compassion(12:34 – 12:54) Closing thoughts and next episode previewDISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTHi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self with that uppercase S, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself.This is episode 67 and the idea is that it will help you create a life you don't need to retreat from. You can find out more about the podcast at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com. You can also get deeper dives by joining the Sole to Soul Circle for bonus interviews, practices, rituals and access to a rich archive including the entire Love Your Whole Self chakra journey.You can also find out more about the book 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing, I forgot the title of my own book there, and other resources at selfcarecoaching.net.And today's episode is basically… I started this podcast thinking that there's a huge gulf between what we as self-care professionals know we want to be doing in an ideal world and what we actually do.Today, it's World Emoji Day and I'm going to have you use emojis to create an emergency self-care plan for yourself for trauma and ADHD.I have a loved one in hospital at the moment (at time of recording) which means that things are different to my normal life. I've massively pared back on my normal daily self-care but I've also really focused on it. I know that I'm no good to anyone if I'm not taking care of myself.Especially with trauma and ADHD we can be really good in a crisis. I think, on the Friday when we had to call the ambulance it was just very, very focused. We don't have to worry about different priorities, it's just like OK. The emergency takes all the focus.Then, as things progress there's more to navigate. We get more and more tired, potentially, if we're not taking good care of ourselves.There are always going to be things that are out of your control but I want you to think about how you navigate uncertainty and how you navigate emergencies and what you can do whether you're dealing with a tough time now or whether you want to put something in place as an emergency self-care kit. It's really important.I really noticed my executive functions worsen. Things like paying for the hospital parking ticket and putting it in the specific pocket in my bag so that I wouldn't lose it and of course losing it. And then I couldn't even turn the steering wheel on the car, I couldn't get the key in the car and I even wondered is this my car because it had been so full-on had I accidentally got into someone else's car. No. I'd locked the steering wheel but I'd never done that before. It's just having lots of extra patience with yourself when you're dealing with it.I'm skipping ahead a bit because it's really about you thinking about what you want to have in place for any emergencies that you might think of. And it's not like you have to think, I'm not encouraging you to ruminate or catastrophise or anything like that, just thinking I've been asking all my guests what is your ideal self-care, your ideal daily practices and weekly and what would be your essentials. If you're ill, if you're travelling, if there's some sort of emergency.Feel better…For the Feel better part, it's very much about regulation, it's very much about the active self-care. I've been swimming practically every day and I swam twice yesterday (at time of recording) because I knew I'm far better for other people if I'm at my best, if I'm peaceful, if I'm calm.And to be honest the second heated pool swim was on the way back from the hospital because I didn't know how I was going to have the energy to stand up in the shower at home.The idea of going for a heated pool swim and then sitting in the steam room and then having a luxurious shower there is nicer than my shower at home. I thought, I'll do that and then just five, ten minutes of swimming, really lovely, that's me. Think about for yourself, think about what is your essential. I'm also thinking my daily yoga nidras. They're essential for me.I'm about to start ADHD medication (have started! More to follow in Episode 69!) but I've been using the daily yoga nidras now for I think more than two years. It's really essential for me but today, it's like so much to do, not going to have time for one of the longer ones that I've got accustomed to.I did a shorter one and it was amazing and it's like so often we think, “Oh but if I can't do the full practice, the full thing, what's the point?” Doing one or two

Does even the thought of money trigger an instant stress response? In this episode, bestselling author and certified trauma of money coach Keris Fox she shares how to transform your relationship with money by rewriting your money story. She explains why so many women believe they're "bad with money" and offers practical steps to befriend your finances.In this conversation, you'll learn:• Why knowing your exact financial position reduces anxiety• Simple daily self-care practices that help money management feel better• How to recognise and soothe your nervous system around money triggers• The importance of checking in with your body before making financial decisionsWhether you struggle with money trauma, avoid checking your bank account or want to move from scarcity to abundance, this episode offers gentle, trauma-informed and VAST/ADHD-friendly approaches to building a healthier relationship with money.Feel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on. With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:• Feel Better (regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from)• Be Better (accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing) and• Do Better (turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large)Thanks for watching or listening. New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode. Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each Wednesday morning.WANT TO WORK WITH ME? • There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos. • All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net • You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme. • If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • While my private practice for one to one work (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision) is almost always at capacity, if you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s still worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together.WANT TO CONNECT WITH ME ON SOCIAL MEDIA? You can find me almost everywhere – please say ‘Hi’ and share your questions or comments: YouTube @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunninghamFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDay And if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from. DISCLAIMERThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.Thanks for watching. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.FULL TRANSCRIPTHi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday I share trauma-informed and ADHD/VAST-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself (and your Self with that uppercase S for that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant, miraculous part of yourself).I do this to help you create a life you don't need to retreat from, and you can find out more at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com. Today's episode, I'm delighted to welcome my friend Keris Fox.She used to be Keris Stainton and she's a best-selling author and she has been running the Ladybird Purse over on Substack for years now, helping women at midlife, myself included, to transform our relationship with money. She is now a certified trauma of money coach and I cannot wait to share our episode.Welcome Keris Fox, formerly Stainton. Thank you so much for joining me.Thank you for having me.Ah, it's such a pleasure. It's so funny because we've only started, like it's in the last few years, we've become, I was going to say real life friends, but we've still never actually met in person. We regularly connect online, but I've known you coming up, what, 15 years online, at more of a distance? Possibly even more than that, I think, yeah.Well, when did you write, I remember you writing your first book. I remember you getting-That's 15 years ago this year. Yeah.But I was on like Journobiz before the book came out, so probably even before that, yeah.Yeah. And now I'm delighted to have you on the Feel Better Every Day Podcast, talking about the trauma of money. Would you like to say a little bit about what you're working on and how people can find you?Yeah, the trauma of money. Talking about the trauma of money. I want to talk about the joy of money as well.I love trauma work because it's all about recovery and it's about the joy, the growth. Yeah, through the trauma to get to the joy.Exactly that, yeah. Well, I'm actually working on, I did Trauma of Money coach training earlier this year, so I am trauma of money certified. Yeah. I'm putting together various programs to do with that, which what I wanted to do when I started trying to put something together, I realised that a lot of the trauma of money stuff is kind of fits in with narrative, with storytelling.Because I'm a novelist as well, I thought the two of them go together quite well. I've been combining the rewriting your money story and your next chapter. I'm putting all of that together and it feels like I've got all of this information now and I'm kind of whittling it down.In the meantime, before I've actually got that put together, I've got my Ladybird Purse money Substack that I've been writing for three and a half years. So every Monday there's an interview with a woman about money and also my own kind of money misadventures. I've started calling it, although I'm not sure that's strictly true anymore.And yeah, I have another Substack, which is my author Substack, which is called Happy Endings. And yes, I have two books out at the minute, one nonfiction, which is the Harry Styles Effect.Yeah, I'm holding up the Harry Styles Effect for people who are listening rather than watching with joy, because this is the book Keris was born to write, basically, and it's just delightful.That's so nice of you. It's like a fandom memoir. So it's not just about Harry Styles, it's about me and fandom and music. And it's also like a celebration of Harry Styles.And then I've just had a novel came out last week, which is under pseudonym, Olivia Harvey. And that's like a new adult sort of sexy rom-com inspired by Below Deck. Stealth, what did somebody call it? Stealth, stealth, stealth sauciness, I think the review said, or stealthily saucy, something like that.Well, congratulations.Thank you.Did I say that's called Rock the Boat, that one? Sorry.No, you didn't. Thank you.People can find out about your books at kerisfox.com. Many, many, many books. So for today's episode, we're talking about how to get through the trauma of money to the joy of money.And I know for me, since I started reading Keris's Ladybird Purse, and I've been interviewed a couple times for it, and it's really made me reassess my own trauma around money.And with my recent ADHD diagnosis, the dyscalculia, and like, it's like I do regular money dates and all. But I often feel like crying, just sorting out bank statements, I've got my UK bank statements, I've got my Irish ones, I've got the business, I've got the personal, it's all, and it's just putting them in date order makes me want to cry. And, and recognising, okay, my brain really does not thrive with numbers.And having the confidence at nearly 50 to say to someone at the bank, or say to someone around, like, I'm really not great with numbers that I got a new accountant who it feels much better with. I've gone on to Xero, but your, your misadventures, as you call them, and your interviews, it's really helped me confront some of my… I'd done money mindset work before I'd done like, kind of my money story, and like, my earliest memory being burgled when we lived in Tottenham, like all of that.But there's something so lovely reading people who love money, and reading people who still struggle with money, but also, I think, with women at midlife. What would you say the biggest problem people have around money?Oh, wow. Well, I think with women, it is thinking that, that we're bad with money. I think that's like, it seems to be the first thing that often when I approach women to...

You're never too old to play. And your brain will thank you.In this episode, I share why play isn't just for children and how reconnecting with your playful side can be transformative for ADHD brains and trauma survivors.From my dolphin encounter to pretending to be dolphins on the harbour with a friend, I explore how silliness and joy can heal.This episode includes:✨ Why our brains learn so well through play (and how to do it deliberately)✨ Permission to be 'foolish' and silly, even as an adult✨ How play creates safety and co-regulation with others✨ Simple ways to start playing when you feel 'too serious' or don't have energy✨ The ripple effect your playfulness has on everyone around✨ You're never 'too old' or 'too serious' to playIf this resonates, please subscribe, share with someone who needs more play in their life and let me know in the comments: How will you add more play to your week?AboutFeel Better Every Day! Learn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on.With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:Feel… regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat fromLove… accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing andHeal… turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large.Thanks for listening or watching.New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode.Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each Wednesday morning.Want to work with me?• There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos.• All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net• You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme.• If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc • While my private practice for one to one work (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision) is almost always at capacity, if you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s still worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together.Want to connect on socials?You can find me almost everywhere – please say ‘Hi’ and tell me what you want to ask or say:YouTube @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunninghamFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDayAnd if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.Chapters(0:02 - 0:30) Introduction to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast (0:30 - 1:06) How we learn so well through play(1:07 - 16:22) We're never too old to play. And dolphinsResources- Episode 7 with Nick Williams on play as a business benefit- Sole to Soul Circle membership for bonus content- Book: 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied WellbeingDisclaimerThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.Thanks for listening. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.Full transcriptI did not expect to see dolphins. A pod of them came over to us so we were back to the harbour. Someone else said go out there at 11 o'clock! Dolphins! And they came over to the boat and they were swimming under the boat and they were leaping through the air and they were being their magnificent miraculous amazing joyful healing transformative selves and I couldn't get over it.Hi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self with that uppercase S, that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself. To help you feel better every day and create a life you don't need to retreat from.You can find out more at the feelbettereverydaypodcast.com or selfcarecoaching.net. Today we're looking at the power of play and the strongest way in which we remember things is through trauma. We're very, very present during traumatic experiences, so those memories go really deep. The second best way to learn is through play, which is obviously way more enjoyable and you get to choose what you learn.So you might feel that you can't remember how to play, you're too old to play, you never knew how to play and I thought I'd explore some ways in which you can have more fun with today's episode.And you might also enjoy episode 7 with Nick Williams, the author of The Work You Were Born to Do and many, many other books. He's talking about how play has become so important to him in terms of helping business leaders do their best thinking and being creative. But ultimately play is restorative, it's fun, it's healing.We play with others, we co-regulate it's never too old to learn. As George Eliot said, it's never too late to be who you might have been. So even if you feel like it's silly, if you're open to the idea of remembering how to play, like you might have kids, you might play all the time, you might kind of get into their fantasy worlds and have adventures and do all sorts of things or you might be the way I used to be, very, very, very serious and play is just so beneficial if you can turn what you're learning like kind of as a student in any area into a playful approach like through music or anything like that.It's far easier to remember but also just for your own wellbeing, just for your own happiness and your own joy. Lots of things take effort, so in terms of the feel better element of my work, the regulation, the working with the will in psychosynthesis terms, the things we actively do. For example for me, I have my first ever hobby as an adult having joined the Roscommon Sub Aqua Club a couple years ago nearly now and I did not expect to be joining or doing anything like that and I regularly question my life choices with 5.30am starts and I'm not a morning person and often dives get cancelled.I'm still a snorkel member because we're on the west coast of Ireland and the weather ... but I know without a shadow of a doubt that while I was already playing in the water with my sea swims and my pool swims and my underwater handstands, learning to snorkel has changed my life. It's incredible and to see the seaweed let alone the crabs and the fish and the dolphins that I got to see a few weeks ago out on the boat, never experienced anything like it.I wanted to anchor that sensation of awe and wonder and I realised that the dolphins I would never have seen had I not kind of encouraged myself quite sternly, I'm not going to say forced myself, but to get back on the boat after I'd got so seasick previously. I'm not the most elegant person getting on and off of boats like walking along, I nearly broke my toe getting onto a yoga mat to teach a class a few weeks ago. I'm not the most graceful person so other people seem to leap on and off more easily, other people seem to get seasick less but I thought, 'Nope, it's a nice day. I'm going to go out there and I'm just going to see what it's like. And then, when I upgrade to dive member I'll be able to get the most out of the experience.' I did not expect to see dolphins. A pod of them came over to us so we were back to the harbour. Someone else said go out there at 11 o'clock! Dolphins! And they came over to the boat and they were swimming under the boat and they were leaping through the air and they were being their magnificent miraculous amazing joyful healing transformative selves and I couldn't get over it.Had I not done the thing, like I couldn't have predicted dolphins, I did say that before we went out on the boat I did ask hopefully will we see dolphins and I think people felt a bit sorry for me.And then they all felt really jealous of me because I was the only one with the driver who saw them close up.They were all on shore after their dive so you have to be willing sometimes with play to put yourself out of comfort zone.For example, the sea swims that are quite playful for me.But almost as fun as the dolphins was then being on shore with one of my

Are you dealing with trauma? PTSD? Complex PTSD? ADHD? Feeling overwhelmed by what’s going on in the world?In this PTSD awareness episode, trauma therapist Eve Menezes Cunningham shares some of her personal journey from PTSD diagnosis to healing, and uses the Feel better. Be better. Do better method to support you in navigating personal and collective trauma.‘Instead of being consumed by hate, his hope was that Israelis and Palestinians and Christians could live in peace and harmony. And he created this school, Hope Flowers.’ Eve also reflects on an interview she did 20 years ago with, Ibrahim Issa, the son of the Hope Flowers School founder in Jerusalem regarding ongoing traumatic stress.About this podcastFeel Better Every Day! Learn from  the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on.With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:•          Feel better (regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from)•          Be better (accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing) and•          Do better (turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large)Thanks for listening or watching.New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode.Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each Wednesday morning.Want to work with me?• There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos.• All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net• You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack (https://evemc.substack.com ) and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme.• If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc  • While my private practice for one to one work (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision) is almost always at capacity, if you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s still worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together.Want to connect with me on social media?You can find me almost everywhere – please say ‘Hi’ and tell me what you want to ask or say:YouTube @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunninghamFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDayAnd if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.Chapters(0:03 – 0:45) Welcome and purpose of the podcast(0:46 – 2:12) Sole to Soul Circle and resources for healing(2:13 – 4:05) PTSD diagnosis and the power of language(4:06 – 6:28) Ongoing trauma: A story of hope from Jerusalem(6:29 – 8:36) Global crisis, collective trauma and marginalised communities(8:37 – 10:32) Self-care in the midst of ongoing trauma(10:33 – 12:14) Feel better. Be better. Do better: Rest, regulation and compassion(12:16 – 12:41) Grounding with what resonates: Feel, Be, or Do better(12:42 – 13:20) Healing through love, protest, and the ocean(13:21 – 14:00) Upcoming Circle content and community nourishment(14:00 – 14:36) Next week’s themeResourcesHope Flowers School article: https://www.nurseryworld.co.uk/content/news/teaching-peaceDisclaimerThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.Thanks for listening. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.Full transcriptHi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday, I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself. That's that highest, wisest, truest, most joyful, brilliant, miraculous part of yourself.I do this to help you create a life you don't need to retreat from. You can find out more at thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com and you can, if you're interested in taking a deeper dive each week for the Sole to Soul Circle, which you can join, there are bonus interviews and deeper dives into the practices that have come up through that week's episode from that week's theme.This week, it’s grounding practices to support trauma recovery.And you also get immediate access to a rich archive, including the entire Love Your Whole Self chakra journey. You might also find the book, 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing of interest. And there are book bonus videos and other self-care coaching resources for trauma, ADHD, and all sorts of areas at selfcarecoaching.net. Today's episode is for PTSD awareness.And with everything that's going on in the world, it's like, much as I know that PTSD, its inclusion in the Diagnostic Statistics Manual and the DSM, it was life-changing for so many people, myself included, when I got a PTSD diagnosis back in 2008. It was after a house fire, and it gave me the language to help me understand my complex PTSD from very early childhood. It helped me learn to heal.It helped me learn to ground and resource and to end up becoming a trauma therapist. And I love my work because I love that there are so many ways in which we can heal. And I'm also aware, I keep thinking of an interview I did, like when I was newly freelance, 2004, it appeared in Nursery World, a UK magazine for nursery people, in 2005.And I just found a link, I will link to it in the show notes. https://www.nurseryworld.co.uk/content/news/teaching-peaceBut I never forgot this man I spoke to in Jerusalem. He was the son of Hussein Ibrahim Issa.His name is Ibrahim Issa. And he ran the Hope Flowers School in Jerusalem. I'm not going to cry.I'm not going to cry. They are bringing together, since his father's work as a Palestinian born refugee who had lost everything after World War II, instead of being consumed by hate, his hope was that Israelis and Palestinians and Christians could live in peace and harmony. And he created this school, Hope Flowers, where all three religions and people of no religion were educated.And they were being bombed, like this is back 2004, 2005, when I was interviewing him. They didn't know one week to the next, like I think a wall had just been destroyed a week earlier. And I said something about PTSD very naively.And he just said, really sadly, it's not post, this is ongoing, the children, they're tiny, tiny children. And it was ongoing. And of course, with everything that's happening in the world, I'm doing my best focus on the people who are working towards building peace and healing and trauma recovery for everyone rather than endless cycles.But I thought there's no point doing something about post-traumatic stress as if you've survived the trauma. And that's all you have to worry about, just focus on the reflection, the healing, the all of it.I think everyone is traumatised right now, I don't want to name any situations, because I don't want to be triggering anyone.But at the same time, it's having to navigate life at different levels. And I know that marginalised communities have had to deal with this for so much longer, ongoing onslaughts to the right to exist, and then having to be professional at work, having to like wanting to bring their dreams into reality.And I thought rather than doing an episode on post-traumatic stress disorder for post-traumatic stress disorder awareness, I would just name it and just encourage you, however you're feeling, whatever global situations or local situations.I really don't want to name local things and global things in case that's not something that's making you cry at the...

Do you wish you could help heal the world but find yourself overwhelmed? Learn to Feel Better, Be Better and DO Better. Subscribe for trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas every Tuesday.Are you navigating trauma and ADHD? This episode is for you. As we approach the Summer Solstice, it's a powerful time to reflect on what you're giving your energy to and how you allow yourself to shine.But what if you don't feel ‘shiny’? Or have the energy you wish you did? Learn to honour your current capacity, especially when living with a trauma history and an ADHD brain.In this episode, you’ll learn:How to release the pressure to perform and embrace self-compassion, even when your energy feels low.Practical, trauma-informed, and ADHD-friendly ways to help your nervous system rebalance, including simple breathwork and mindful movement.Why allowing yourself to rest and simply be (even when hyper-vigilance or performance conditioning makes it challenging) is essential.How regulating your own system helps you contribute more effectively to the world without burning out.Why embracing community and collective action is especially important when you feel the weight of global challenges.Empower yourself to Feel Better, Be Better and Do Better.The Feel Better Every Day PodcastLearn from the self and Self* care practices the professionals depend on.With a mixture of solo and interview episodes, your host, Eve Menezes Cunningham (author of 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing) shares trauma-informed and VAST / ADHD-friendly self and Self* care ideas to help you:• Feel Better (regulate your nervous system and do the things that help you create a life you don’t need to retreat from)• Be Better (accept yourself completely with love, compassion and kindness – you don’t need to do a thing) and• Do Better (turn what hurts your heart into action to support your family, organisations, communities and the world at large)Thanks for listening or watching.New episodes come out every Tuesday morning (Ireland time) and if you subscribe (via your favourite podcasting app or by joining the Sole to Soul Circle), you’ll be notified about each new episode.Sole to Soul Circle members get deeper dives each Wednesday morning.Want to work with me?• There’s the book – 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing – and all the book bonus videos.• All the free resources (for trauma, ADHD, menopause, solopreneurs, anxiety, sleep, confidence, resilience, finding purpose, meaning and joy and more) across my platforms and the library of self-care ideas and practices at https://selfcarecoaching.net• You can join the Sole to Soul Circle on Substack https://evemc.substack.com and get bonus interviews and content specially designed to help you dive deeper into each week’s theme.• If you want to support my work but don’t want to commit to a membership, even for a month, you can choose any amount at https://ko-fi.com/evemc• While my private practice for one to one work (trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly therapies, Self care coaching, clinical supervision and supervisor’s supervision) is almost always at capacity, if you’re based in Ireland or the UK, it’s still worth completing the short form at https://selfcarecoaching.net/contact to book your free telephone consultation in the hope that we can find a mutually convenient time to work together.Want to connect with me on social media?You can find me almost everywhere – please say ‘Hi’ and share your questions and comments:YouTube @evemenezescunninghamSubstack @evemcBluesky @eveimcTikTok @evemenezescunninghamInsta @evemenezescunninghamFacebook @FeelBetterEveryDayAnd if you’d like to leave a review and/or rate this and other episodes you’ve enjoyed, your feedback and support helps me help more people (of all genders) with trauma histories and/or ADHD take better care of their whole selves and create lives they don’t need to retreat from.Chapters(0:02 - 5:27) – Introduction to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast and Summer Solstice(5:28 - 14:00) – How to work with your nervous system to feel better this Solstice and let yourself shine. Feel Better and Be Better(14:01 - 18:58) – Moving into Do Better to improve things not only for yourself but your family, teams, communities and world(18:59 - 20:55) – Finding the courage to speak up for others and an invitation to the Sole to Soul Circle(20:55 - 21:22) – How to join the Sole to Soul Circle at evemc.substack.comDisclaimerThe content I share is not a replacement for one to one trauma therapy (etc). While you can do an enormous amount to support yourself, please always seek appropriate medical advice.Thanks for listening. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.#TraumaInformed #ADHDSupport #SelfCare #NervousSystemRegulation #SummerSolstice #PodcastForADHD #TraumaRecovery #EveMenezesCunninghamFull transcriptHi, I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. Every Tuesday I share trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas to help you take better care of yourself and your Self with that uppercase S: that highest, wisest, truest, wildest, most joyful, brilliant and miraculous part of yourself. The idea is to help you feel better every day, creating life you don't need to retreat from.You can find out more at http://thefeelbettereverydaypodcast.com And in today's episode, we're celebrating the Summer Solstice. So in the Northern Hemisphere, it's the 21st of June. I mean, it's the 21st of June everywhere, but it's summer here.If you're in the Southern Hemisphere, you might be celebrating the winter solstice. And I'm kind of laughing because I live on the west coast of Ireland and it's been quite wintery even in June right now, which is perfect for this episode because the Summer Solstice.When we're working with the Celtic Wheel of the Year energies, it's a wonderful time to think about your public self, that part of you. It's a great time to think about your commitments and what you're giving your energy to.It's a wonderful time to think about letting yourself shine. And you think of summer solstice, you think bright sunshine, sunflower energy, glorious warmth. And that's not always the case.And that's also not always the case with yourself. Sometimes our energies are aligned and in tune with the seasonal energies, whether the lunar cycle or the Celtic Wheel or whatever you follow. And other times they can feel like there's a bit of a mismatch.So if there are lots of things you want to be doing, lots of contributions you want to be making to the world and you just don't have the energy, that's fine. It's about honouring yourself and letting yourself be.Really just noticing for yourself now, you might want to grab a journal and think for yourself, what do you tell yourself when you feel like you should be doing more? When you feel like you should be your shiniest, happiest self and you just don't feel like it?Maybe you have high hopes for what you'd like to be doing, maybe in your life, in your family, in your work, in your community, in the world at large, all these ideas and just struggling to manifest them, struggling to make them a reality?I'm really encouraging you today to connect with your energies this Solstice and to think about how you might feel safe and secure enough to step out of your comfort zone, let yourself be seen and heard, let yourself be more visible and recognise that that is going to be scary for your nervous system. Any time we expand, there's that part of you that's going to be afraid. Working with it rather than denying it means you can support yourself through it and still make the kind of contribution you want to make to helping create a better, fairer, more equitable planet for everyone and also in your own work, in your own life.But we need to recognise where we are, we need to start where we are. There's no point thinking that you've got all these brilliant ideas if you do or feeling overwhelmed. There's so much in 2025 to feel hopeless and overwhelmed by, but that doesn't help anyone.For the Feel Better portion of this episode, so the Feel Better element is for those times when you have the motivation, the energy, the bandwidth to do the things that can help change your state, that can help resource you. We're going to be working with the nervous system and just recognising that we might be quite sophisticated beings in some ways, but our wiring is ancient and we just aren't equipped for everything that's going on.The best thing we can do is not argue with reality and build in as much downtime as possible so that our nervous system can do the lift, lift, lift, sympathetic activation that life and all its excitement and all its stress and all its horror can bring. But the last thing we want to do is burn out and just go into that collapse mode. By building in times in which we can actively rest, actively rest, I make it sound like such hard work…With trauma histories, with ADHD, rest and relaxation can feel like really hard work, but it's about countering what's normally happening. You're on the go at work, you're on the go at home, you're on the go with your unique brain wiring, thinking about a million things, a million causes you care

Trauma and/or ADHD? Stop worrying you're 'too much' and be more youIt's easy to feel overwhelmed when navigating ADHD and trauma recovery. You might constantly receive messages to tone it down or conform. But what if your unique sensitivities and intensity aren't something to suppress, but an expression of your Self?This is where psychosynthesis and its concept of The Ways offers an empowering perspective. Developed by Roberto Assagioli, psychosynthesis is a transpersonal approach that honours your inherent wholeness and the unique ways your soul seeks to express itself. Instead of shaming you into being less, it celebrates the diverse paths individuals have taken throughout history to live authentically.The Ways – seven types of soul expression – provide a framework for understanding not only yourself but also your loved ones. Imagine gaining self-empathy for your sensitivities, like experiencing misophonia on the Way of Beauty, or recognising your drive to make a difference on the Way of Action.It’s not about fitting into a box but about recognising and giving yourself permission to fully embody your unique gifts and interests. For ADHDers especially, who often hear they are too much, The Ways offer a powerful reminder that your full, whole self is exactly what's needed for personal growth and to contribute to the world.Exploring The Ways can help you:Connect with your unique purpose and potentialFind greater purpose, meaning and joy in your daily lifeDevelop deeper empathy for yourself and others andIntegrate all parts of yourself for true wholeness.Are you ready to support your soul as it unfurls and blossoms? Listen to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast wherever you get your podcasts or watch here.Work with meWant to work with me (or access book bonus videos and other free resources)?Find me on social media @evemenezescunningham and @feelbettereverydayThanks for listening. Please subscribe / follow and share with someone who you think will benefit from this episode.#TraumaRecovery, #ADHD, #EmotionalRegulation, #SelfCare, #WholeSelf, #Psychosynthesis, #TheWays, #SoulExpression, #InherentWholeness, #Neurodivergent, #FeelBetterEveryDay, #PieroFerrucci, #InevitableGrace, #RobertoAssagioli, #Subpersonalities, #Transpersonal, #PurposeDrivenLife, #FindingMeaning, #InnerPeace, #WorldPeace, #HealingJourney, #MindBodySoul, #AuthenticSelf, #ShineBright, #SelfEmpathy, #SensorySensitivity, #Misophonia, #WayOfBeauty, #WayOfAction, #WayOfIllumination, #WayOfUniversalLove, #WayOfDanceAndRitual, #WayOfScience, #WayOfDevotion, #WayOfTheWill, #InnerWork, #PersonalGrowth, #GuidedImagery, #JournalPrompts, #SoleToSoulCircle, #SelfCareCoaching, #EveMenezesCunningham, #PodcastForHealing, #ADHDFriendly, #TraumaInformedFull transcriptIn a world in which so many of us, especially with trauma histories and ADHD, get so many messages shaming people into being less, to tone it down, to homogenise, and one of the things I love most about The Ways is it really respects seven different ways. Very different ways in which people throughout history that have been researched, their souls were expressing themselves.Hi, you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and I'm here to help you create the life you don't have to retreat from. I'm doing this by helping you take better care of yourself. That's the lower case self care and also that upper case Self, that highest, wisest, truest, most brilliant, joyful and miraculous part of yourself. I do this by sharing trauma-informed and ADHD-friendly self-care ideas and I would love to hear how you're getting on and what questions you might have.In today's episode, we're working with one of my favourite elements of psychosynthesis known as The Ways. It’s the different ways in which our souls express themselves. So in a world in which so many of us, especially with trauma histories and ADHD, so many messages shaming people into being less, to tone it down, to homogenise and one of the things I love most about The Ways is it really respects seven different ways, very different ways in which people throughout history that have been researched, their souls were expressing themselves. And it helps us have more empathy for whichever resonates most for ourselves and also to better understand loved ones and others in our lives. Now I'm not suggesting that we're up there with the geniuses that Piero Ferrucci studied for his gorgeous book, Inevitable Grace: Breakthroughs in the Lives of Great Men and Women, Guides to Your Self-Realisation.I talk about The Ways in 365 Ways to Feel Better: Self-care Ideas for Embodied Wellbeing, but if you have a chance to read Piero's gorgeous book I highly recommend it.Welcome to episode 62 and it's an introduction. My core counselling training was in psychosynthesis and it was developed by Roberto Assagioli who was an Italian who had been massively influenced by Eastern philosophies as well as through his work with Freud and Jung.Probably best known for his parts work in psychosynthesis (it's known as subpersonalities), psychosynthesis is a transpersonal approach so we're working with the parts of ourselves that are beyond the personal.We're always, anytime I'm working with a client, I'm looking at what might be trying to emerge at a soul level as well as whatever the actual issue is, whether it's about boundaries or whatever it might be. All of our parts are ultimately trying to help us. By getting curious about them and befriending them rather than trying to annihilate them, we can properly integrate.Another way in which we integrate psychosynthesis, it sounds so jargony, but the idea is that synthesis, it was initially called bio-psychosynthesis, so very influenced by yogic philosophy for example, that union between body and mind, everything coming together. One of the ways in which we can synthesise is by working with our inherent wholeness and by connecting with the ways in which our unique soul is trying to express itself in this lifetime in the world.We're all different. By connecting with our own unique gifts and interests we can not only live more in line with our potential and purpose, finding joy, purpose and meaning as we develop, but we can also better support others and contribute to the world at large by being our full whole selves.How many times as ADHDers do you hear that you're too much? You're not. It's time to shine. I'm recording this a little bit in advance but we've just had a Full Moon which is always a reminder to shine.I was really fortunate to interview Piero Ferrucci who'd continued Assagiolie's work on the ways in this beautiful book I mentioned, Inevitable Grace, and pre-internet he had done enormous research looking at these phenomenal people that most of us will have heard of even if we're not familiar with them. His other books include the beautiful Power of Kindness and so many more.When we disown negative parts of ourselves, so I say that as if like negatives in air quotes, we project them onto others. I don't think anyone is looking around at 2025 thinking it's idyllic. It is pretty grim, it's certainly very interesting and by working with the parts of ourselves that we so often project onto others and owning them we're contributing to personal peace and world peace.I know that sounds a bit grandiose but we all have so much more power and responsibility than we often believe. Especially in the face of such an onslaught of horrors.I love the way, I don't want to like spoil anything and this is very much an introduction, but there are seven ways in which the soul expresses itself and, in all of them, the transpersonal experiences, their breakthroughs, the self-actualisation.It's not easy but it is possible. By familiarising ourselves with what those who've come before us have done – and I'm aware like as I've been working on this episode I'm thinking of people I would fit into The Ways in modern times (eg, Simone Biles, the Way of the Will, AOC, Way of Action) because the book was written a good while ago.As you find out more, I hope that you will give yourself permission to imagine your own soul unfurling and blossoming.If you're a subscriber to my free newsletter you'll receive some journal prompts to help you with that.And if you're a member of the Sole to Soul Circle (which you can join for less than two euros a week) you'll be receiving a recording of one of my favourite guided imagery practices from Piero Ferrucci's book to help you connect with your own sense of purpose, meaning and joy.Access additional resources to support your own purpose, meaning and joy at selfcarecoaching.net/home/purpose-meaning-and-joy or look at selfcarecoaching.net/services/psychosynthesis.I go into more depth into the ways in the book and of course Piero's book is phenomenal and I highly recommend it. I recommend all of his books.We're going to start with the Way of Beauty and some of the examples he uses for this are Chekhov, Schuman, Van Gogh, Gaughin and Kafka. It's very much about learning to set aside stereotypes and worn out attitudes and to learn it all over again without fear of hesitation of being ourselves. So

This week’s guest, the Booby Physio (aka former Ireland rugby player Siobhan O’Donovan) shares some life changing advice (well, it has been for me!) on all kinds of ways in which we can better support our whole selves. You can find her at posturefittingphysio.com and on social media at posture.fittingWatch here or listen wherever you get your podcastsLet me know how you’re going to start better supporting yourself today (and while a lot of the conversation is about boobs, much of it is beneficial for all genders).Le grá (with love),EveiFull transcriptIt wasn't as much of an impact for me because I wasn't in a space where I was aware of it, but psychologically, huge, absolutely huge. So then I kind of went, this is mad. If this is having this effect on me, what can I do to bring this to my patients? And then after several years, I then set up my own physiotherapy service offering to patients the option for me to help them to be to internally support their breast weight through their posture or alignment and externally through optimal bra fitting.Hi, you're listening to the Feel Better Every Day Podcast. I'm Eve Menezes Cunningham and I'm here to help you create a life you don't need to retreat from by taking better care of yourself and your Self with an uppercase S, that highest, wisest, truest, most joyful, brilliant, and miraculous part of yourself.I love sharing these trauma-informed and VAST/ADHD friendly self-care ideas, and I hope you enjoy listening as much as I've enjoyed making them.Welcome, Siobhan O'Donovan! Thank you so, so much for joining me.You're very welcome. I'm very, very delighted to be here.I am so excited. I went to the Dive Ireland show a few weeks ago and Siobhan, known as the Booby Physio, was giving a talk on boobs and buoyancy and it was the only talk I went to.Thank you.It was basically about, like, I'm a member of Roscommon Sub Aqua Club, but when I come to the diving it's something I was aware of, like buoyancy, all the rest of it, different bodies. And what you were talking, it wasn't just about the diving, it's about daily life. And I just think what you're doing is phenomenal and I want as many people to hear about it as possible. I got home, I got rid of most of my bras because they were stabbing me and all the rest of it.And I'm on the way to replacing, I've replaced two of them so far, I'll be, like, gradually, but it's incredible work you do. So thank you, thank you, thank you. And what would you like to say about what you're working on at the moment, what you do?So I suppose if I give you a little bit of background as to how I've kind of ended up being surrounded by breasts.I started my life as a PE teacher because I wanted to work within an active profession, and this was a long time ago when I was doing my first degree. And there weren't many options, there weren't many options in the activity field and there were fewer options again for women. So lots of things that I now look back on and I can see gender gap situations and things like that now that I'm a little bit more aware of that situation.But from the point of view of a profession, I really never gave any thought to anything other than possibly becoming a sports journalist and then realise, no, that's not, that's not a thing. There is no, you know, because it was journalism and you then maybe reported on sports as opposed to now where it's a bit more specific. But it was either that or and then I was like, well, that's going to be sitting, you know, on a typewriter.And I wanted a more active thing. So PE teaching was the basically the only option, but also something that I was really happy to be doing. I was, I was happy to go on to be a PE teacher for the rest of my life, or so I thought, until I did my actual four-year degree.Within that four-year degree, we had a couple of modules on exercise physiology. So getting a little bit deeper into how the body works, deeper than we would have done in, you know, Leaving Cert biology. And then also there was a module on sports injuries.And I kind of sat there through that and I thought, we really as PE teachers need to know this stuff because we are encouraging kids to be active. And if we give them, for example, an exercise or a movement that is potentially inappropriate, then we're effectively possibly teaching them something that could ultimately be damaging for them.Now, having been in the field that I'm in for a lot of years, what we now know is that movement is absolutely a non-negotiable and it is far more important for somebody to be moving than for us to be focusing too much on, you need to be moving with your neck in this position or whatever.But I've also come a little bit full circle on that in that we need to be mindful of the way that we hold ourselves because that does affect how we function. Yeah. That's a bit that I'll come back to when we talk a little bit more about posture.I realised that there was the potential for me as a PE teacher to not be informed enough to be providing good quality movement advice. And so after I had finished my degree, I was teaching, I taught in London. And while I was there, I looked into how do I do more about this sports injuries bit? That's where I was focusing on.Basically, cut a long story short, physio degree, three years plus a two year postgrad in sports, which would have involved me doing a lot of stuff that I didn't have an interest in. And also five years on top of four years financially, that was never going to happen. And then I heard about a Masters in the States. And basically, that's what I did. I went over to the States, did a year of prerequisite courses to get on to the Masters, then did the Masters.And this was back in the early ‘90s when, you know, flying over to the States meant, ‘I'm gone for the year. You're not going to see me for a year.’ And I'd be lucky if I get back in the year. Very different to what it is now.So that was that was quite a big move. And I suppose I like one of the things that I'm very proud of the fact that I did, because if I hadn't done, I probably would have been a very happy PE teacher for the rest of my life. But I kind of feel like what I'm doing now is impacting people in ways that are different to what would have happened if I'd stayed in PE.While I was over there, the focus very much on what I was doing was on prevention of injuries. So it wasn't just wait for the fire to happen and try and put the fire out.It was let's not have the fire start in the first place. Let's look at people's bodies. Let's look at how they move. Let's look at their lives and how they function. And let's prevent problems.Then when I came back on this side of the water, I was pretty unique in that most people who would have gone on and done a physio degree, it would have been here are the problems. This is how we treat them.And originally now it has changed. But originally, the focus would have been more on treatment. And I think what has happened over the years is people have come to realise that in order to do effective treatment, we also need to prevent the problem from coming back.Therefore, that whole preventive aspect has come into play over here. It was more strong in the States because the degree that I did was based in schools and colleges. It was based on students having exposure to athletic injury every day because they were training every day like this.The school sports system over there is incredibly intense. Yeah, I'll do it voluntarily, but they're training literally every day and possibly two games a week. So if you've that much exposure to potential for injury, then there is more injury happening.The degree that I did was for a specific qualification that's school based. But when I then came back, I had quite a unique set. Well, I had a pretty completely unique set of qualifications and skills.One of the things that I did was I got on board with developing those degrees in the UK and we now have them in Ireland as well. Looking at that more specific athletic sports. And when I say athletic, I don't mean you have to be an athlete.I mean, being physically active and how that can, you know, the ramifications of that. So whether the person is going out for a walk or whether they are chasing an Olympic medal, that kind of a field. And so I was involved with that and with setting up the first professional body for that side of things.And that was very much where my focus was. I was dealing with the active population. And then life changed for me in London when I had a bra fitting and I had it done purely by chance, purely because I had an hour to kill before I went to The Proms.And with I was with my mother-in-law. I had read about this shop in London and that, you know, that I knew did bra fitting. And I was like, well, here I am, 45 years of age.Sure, I may as well go and have my first one. And it was you know, it literally changed my view on everything. I walked out that door an inch taller.Yeah. I don't know if I said this at the at the Scuba……I'm just I think I know the shop you mean. Yes. But also. Oh, no, no, there's...