recovered-ish with chloe cox

Episode DescriptionLast week's episode sparked a lot of conversation online. I posted a clip about eating disorder recovery in the ozempic era and the comments absolutely exploded — and it got me thinking about something I've been wanting to talk about for a while.The thoughts I had in my eating disorder that I'm not proud of. The ones that would probably get me canceled if I posted them without context. The ones that felt so real at the time and are so clearly the disorder talking when I look back now.In this episode I'm unpacking each of those thoughts, where they actually came from, and what they say about the disorder — not about who I am or who you are. If you've had thoughts in your eating disorder that have made you feel like a bad person, this episode is directly for you.In This Episode:Why I posted about my ugliest ED thoughts on Instagram — and why the response floored meThe core reframe: eating disorders are not personality traitsHow eating disorders distort your value system to make harmful behaviors feel moral and rightEach of the ugly thoughts I had — unpacked honestly and without shameFeeling superior when eating less than others at the table — and what was really going onFeeling threatened when someone else's body changed — and the identity piece underneath itBelieving hunger meant I was doing something right — and what that was really aboutBelieving my body said something about my character — and the identity crisis driving itThinking my therapist and dietician were jealous of me — and why the eating disorder needs you to believe thatNot wanting a normal body — and why "just eat normally" was never going to landThinking enjoying food made me weak — and the fear underneath itThe darkest thought — and why it was depression talking, not who I wasWhy your eating disorder thoughts are not your identity — and what they actually areTimestamps:0:00 Intro 1:00 What happened when I posted about the ozempic episode — and what it inspired 4:00 The core frame: eating disorders are not personality traits 6:00 How eating disorders distort your value system 8:00 Ugly thought #1: feeling superior when eating less than others 13:00 What self-control actually is — and what the eating disorder gets wrong about it 14:00 Ugly thought #2: feeling threatened when someone else's body changed 17:00 The identity and scarcity piece underneath that thought 18:00 Ugly thought #3: believing hunger meant I was doing something right 21:00 Interoception — and how the eating disorder distorts your body's cues 22:00 Ugly thought #4: believing my body said something about my character 26:00 Not knowing who I was — and trying to manufacture identity through my body 28:00 Ugly thought #5: thinking my therapist and dietician were jealous of me 30:00 Why the eating disorder needs you to believe everyone trying to help has an ulterior motive 32:00 Ugly thought #6: not wanting a normal body 35:00 Why "just eat normally" was never going to be comforting 37:00 Ugly thought #7: thinking enjoying food made me weak 40:00 Ugly thought #8: believing body change would be worse than not existing 43:00 Why that thought is depression — not character 45:00 You are not your eating disorder thoughts 47:00 Closing thoughtsQuotes from This Episode:"The thing about self-control is youResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

One of the most common questions I get — from clients, from my own lived experience, from people who have spent years wondering — is this: why me? Why did I get an eating disorder when the people around me didn't?In this episode I'm getting into the real answer. Not the oversimplified version. The actual, nuanced, deeply personal answer — using my own story, my clinical experience, and the framework I use with clients in my group program The Quasi-Recovery Exit to help people understand themselves in a way that actually moves the needle in recovery.This one is a thinker. I hope it gives you some real clarity.This Episode Is Brought to You By Cozy EarthCozy Earth makes the softest, most comfortable pajamas and bedding I’ve foung — and comfort in my body is something I don't compromise on anymore. Visit CozyEarth.com and use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off.In This Episode:Why I grew up with two sisters, in the same family, doing the same activities — and I'm the only one who got an eating disorderThe genetics loads the gun, environment pulls the trigger framework — and what it actually means for understanding your own storyThe specific temperament traits I was born with that made me vulnerable to an eating disorderHow my performing arts high school became the environmental trigger that intensified those traitsWhy understanding what caused your eating disorder is actually one of the most powerful things you can do in recoveryThe identity conversation — how the traits your eating disorder co-opted are actually your greatest strengthsWhy you won't lose yourself when you recover — you'll finally find yourselfHow narrative therapy helps you make meaning of your story without shameWhat to do with the traits you don't want to give up in recoveryA reframe for the question "what's wrong with me?" — and what to ask insteadTimestamps:0:00 Intro + new desk setup 2:00 Life update — pregnancy announcement followup, son's hospital stay, Disneyland plans 4:00 A note on binge urges and what they're actually telling you 6:00 Today's topic: what actually causes an eating disorder? 7:00 Growing up with two sisters — same family, same upbringing, only I got an eating disorder 10:00 Genetics loads the gun, environment pulls the trigger 12:00 The temperament traits I was born with — drive, perfectionism, sensory sensitivity 16:00 Early signs of genetic predisposition — body awareness from a very young age 18:00 How performing arts high school became the environmental trigger 22:00 Competition, comparison, and the perfect storm that created my eating disorder 24:00 How to understand your own story through this lens 26:00 The identity conversation — temperament vs conditioning 28:00 Your eating disorder traits are actually your superpowers 30:00 Narrative therapy and making meaning of your story 32:00 What to ask yourself instead of "what's wrong with me?" 35:00 How to channel your traits toward recovery and growth 37:00 Closing thoughtsPractical Reflection Questions From This Episode:What traits do I have that might have made me vulnerable to an eating disorder?What life circumstances intensified those traits or made the eating disorder necessary?What do I actually like about those traits — and do I want to keep them in recovery?Resources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

Episode DescriptionFirst things first — I have some news. Big news. News that explains a lot of the cryptic, tired, off-kilter energy you've been picking up on these last few weeks.I'm pregnant. Baby number two is on the way and she is a girl.But after that announcement, we're getting into something I've been genuinely fired up about — because right now, in 2026, I believe this is one of the hardest moments in recent history to be in eating disorder recovery. The cultural noise around weight loss is louder than I have ever heard it. And I wanted to talk honestly about what that's like, what it stirs up, and how to actually stay the course when it feels like the whole world is doing the opposite.In This Episode:The big announcement — baby number two, and what being pregnant with a girl brings up for me as someone in ED recoveryWhy I believe right now is one of the hardest moments in history to be actively recovering from an eating disorderThe cultural conversation around weight loss in 2026 — and why it feels so different from anything we've seen beforeThe comparison to the nineties and early two thousands thin ideal — and why this moment feels even harderA client story about recovering while her parents were actively dieting — and what that taught me about staying the course when everyone around you is going a different directionWhy choosing to eat adequately right now is genuinely a countercultural actThe psychology behind why people without eating disorders get pulled into these cycles — and why understanding that actually helpsWhy GLP-1s and weight loss medications are a different conversation for people with eating disorder historiesHow to use a little healthy rebellion to protect your recoveryPractical strategies for navigating social media, diet culture talk, and the cultural moment we're inTimestamps:0:00 Intro 1:00 Reflecting on last week's body image episode 2:00 The big announcement — I'm pregnant 5:00 Having a girl — and what that brings up around passing on an eating disorder 7:00 Why right now is one of the hardest times in history to be in ED recovery 9:00 The cultural noise around weight loss in 2026 10:30 Comparing this moment to the nineties thin ideal 12:00 How we got here — and why it feels different this time 13:30 Choosing to eat adequately as a countercultural act 15:00 A client story: recovering while her parents were actively dieting 20:00 Putting yourself in the driver's seat of your own values 22:00 The psychology of why people without EDs fall into these cycles 24:00 Why GLP-1s are a different conversation for people in recovery 27:00 It's okay to feel frustrated that other people seem to have an easy solution 29:00 Practical strategies: resetting your algorithm, limiting social media 32:00 Clarifying your values around why nourishment matters to you 33:30 The internal scoff — giving yourself permission to know better 34:30 Finding your people and filling your feed with counterculture 35:30 Telling yourself you can wait it out 37:00 Closing thoughts — eat your food. you know better.Practical Strategies Mentioned:Limit or take breaks from social media — especially during high-exposure seasons like spring and summerReset your algorithm intentionally — spend time actively liking content that feels safe and muting or reporting what doesResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

Honest confession: my body image has been pretty rough lately. And yes, I know — I'm a recovered eating disorder therapist who just last week talked about how quiet my ED voice has gotten. So what gives?In this episode I'm getting real about what bad body image actually looks like for me now, 11 years into recovery. How it's different from the eating disorder voice. What body dysmorphia really feels like from the inside. And the specific things that actually help me move through it — not the textbook DBT stuff, just what genuinely works for me right now.This one is honest, a little messy, and I think a lot of you are going to relate.This Episode Is Brought to You By Cozy EarthBad body image weeks call for a soft place to land at the end of the day. Cozy Earth makes the softest, most comfortable pajamas and the absolute coziest bedding — and comfort is something I don't compromise on anymore. Visit CozyEarth.com and use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off.In This Episode:Why you can have a quiet ED voice and still have terrible body image — and how those are actually different thingsWhat body dysmorphia really is and how it shows up as a sensory experience, not just negative thoughtsWhy bad body image days are often a signal that something else is off in your lifeThe wardrobe disaster phenomenon and what it actually has to do with body imageWhy body neutrality is more accessible than body positivity — and what it actually looks like in practiceWhat I do instead of white-knuckling through a bad body image weekWhy clothing and personal style have genuinely been a game changer for my body imageSomatic tools that help when you want to completely dissociate from your bodyHow to talk about body image struggles in a way that actually helps you process themWhy showing your body care — even when you don't love it — is what actually heals the relationshipTimestamps:0:00 Intro 1:00 Life update — a weird season, turning 31, and learning to meet my own needs 5:30 This week's topic: my body image has been rough lately 6:00 How body image and the ED voice are actually different things 8:30 What body dysmorphia really feels like from the inside 12:00 The wardrobe disaster and what it signals 15:00 The sensory experience of body dysmorphia 18:30 Social media, idealized bodies, and wanting to dissociate 20:30 Body neutrality vs body positivity — and why neutrality is more accessible 23:00 Riding the wave vs actually doing something about it 25:30 Feelings change — they always have a beginning, middle, and end 26:30 What actually helps me: clothes, comfort, and personal style 29:30 Nuuly subscription — and why it's been a game changer especially for variable sizing in recovery 33:00 Zooming out: bad body image as a signal, not a fact 35:30 Somatic tools for when you want to crawl out of your skin 38:30 Orienting exercise — how to arrive back in your body 39:30 Body patting and butterfly taps 40:30 Talking about it — but in a specific way 43:00 Showing your body care even when you don't love it 45:00 Closing thoughtsPractical Tools Mentioned:Zoom out: when body image is off, look at what else is going on in your life — it's usually a signal, not the whole storyOrienting exercise: find the farthest point you can see, then the closest, then noResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

Episode DescriptionOne of the most common questions I get — from clients, from Instagram, from people deep in the trenches of recovery — is this: does the eating disorder voice ever actually go away?In this episode, I get honest about my own experience with the ED voice: what it sounded like at its worst, how it shifted through different stages of recovery, and where it lives now (spoiler: it's a lot more like an intrusive thought about tap dancing in a grocery store than a voice running my life).This isn't a tidy yes-or-no answer, because recovery isn't tidy. But it is a real one — and one I don't think the internet talks about honestly enough.In This Episode:What the eating disorder voice actually is — and why it can feel like a separate voice in your head (and no, that doesn't mean you're "crazy")The difference between ego syntonic and ego dystonic thinking, and why that shift matters in recoveryMy personal experience with the ED voice from its loudest point to where it lives nowWhy the voice often gets louder when you start recovering — and what that actually meansThe beach ball analogy: why trying to "shut up" the ED voice often backfiresWhat actually moves the needle: building your own voice, not silencing theirsThe near-relapse I've talked about before — and why it happened even without a constantly active voiceWhy "if I can't fully recover, why even try?" is one of the most dangerous traps in recoveryPractical tools for when the voice feels all-consumingTimestamps:0:44 Intro & life update 3:22 Episode topic intro: the eating disorder voice question 7:19 What is the "eating disorder voice"? 10:56 Who asks this & why 13:39 My personal experience: the voice at its worst 14:38 Do I still have disordered thoughts? My honest answer 20:42 How I got to where I am today 28:06 The beach ball metaphor: giving the voice less space 32:24 My answer: yes and no 36:54 Practical tips if the voice is all-consuming 40:03 OutroPractical Tools Mentioned:Name the voice: learn to label thoughts as "eating disorder thoughts" without immediately fighting themHear it, don't obey it: practice acknowledging the ED voice and giving yourself permission to have a different opinion — even if you don't know what that is yetIdentify the feeling underneath: fear, panic, sadness — and ask what you need that isn't an eating disorder behaviorThe "noise" technique: when all else fails, just say it out loud — noise, noise, noiseQuotes from This Episode:"The goal maybe isn't to stop having an eating disorder voice entirely. Maybe the goal is to stop having it rule your life.""It stopped being just about the eating disorder. I started writing more about meeting new people and discovering new parts of me.""Even if your life can be 50% better than it is right now — that is so worth it compared to the 100% hell that is living with an eating disorder."Keywords/Tags: eating disorder recovery, eating disorder voice, ED voice, does the eating disorder voice go away, quasi-recovery, restrictive eating disorder, disordered eating, food guilt, recovery mindset, anorexia recovery, bulimia recovery, Recovered-ish podcast, Chloe Cox, recovered-ish, eating disorder therapist, eating diResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hello, lovely friends. welcome back to recovered-ish.today we’re talking about the part of recovery that i think catches a lot of people off guard:how long it takes. how messy it is. and how discouraging it can feel when you’re doing “everything right” and still not feeling better yet.because i think a lot of people go into recovery expecting it to feel hard for a little while… and then eventually click into place.and when that doesn’t happen, it’s really easy to spiral into: is this even working? why is this still so hard? am i doing recovery wrong?this episode is the reality check i think a lot of people need.in this episode, i talk about:why recovery often feels worse before it feels betterthe part of healing nobody really prepares you forwhy treatment is a beginning, not a magic fixhow eating disorders create false safetywhy discomfort doesn’t mean you’re failingwhat actually keeps people going when recovery feels long and exhaustingwhy you’re not behind just because it’s taking timei also talk about the difference between wanting recovery and actually staying in it long enough for your brain and body to catch up.if you’ve ever thought, “i’m trying so hard… why does this still feel awful?” this one is for you.sponsortoday’s episode is sponsored by Cozy Earth — truly one of my favorite brands i’ve gotten to partner with.if you want to romanticize your life a little and make your bed / pajamas / nervous system feel better, i highly recommend.use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off 👉 www.cozyearth.comsupport beyond the podcast💛 Recovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recovery use code PODCAST for $57 off 👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloedon’t forget to eat your food.Resources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hi! welcome back to recovered-ish.today we’re talking about food guilt.but not in the surface-level way it’s usually talked about.because this isn’t just“i feel a little guilty.”this is the kind of guilt that hits after you eat and makes you feel like you need to fix it. immediately.the kind that lingers.the kind that turns into“i shouldn’t have done that” → “i am bad.”and if you’ve ever been stuck in that loop ofeat → feel awful → compensate → feel safe → repeatthis episode is going to make a lot of things click.⚠️ content notethis episode discusses eating disorder thoughts, food guilt, and compensatory urges.no numbers or graphic details.in this episode, i talk about:why food guilt feels so intensethe difference between guilt and shame (and why it matters)how guilt reinforces the eating disorder cyclewhy your body reacts like it’s in danger after eatingwhere “good vs bad” food beliefs actually come fromthe problem with “clean eating” and food ruleswhy this isn’t really about willpowerwhy thinking differently isn’t enough on its ownhow to stop trying to “fix” the foodwhat to actually do after you eat when the guilt hitsreal ways to regulate your body instead of compensatingresources / sponsorsponsorthis episode is sponsored by Cozy Earth.you guys know i’m really intentional about what i share here, and i would never partner with a brand that didn’t actually align.cozy earth makes some of the softest, most comfortable loungewear and bedding i’ve ever owned. like genuinely the kind of stuff that makes you feel a little more taken care of in your day to day.if you want to check them out, you can use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off.www.cozyearth.comRecovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recoveryget $57 off with code PODCAST👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/follow me on instagram:instagram.com/recoverwithchloe@recoverwithchloeResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hello, lovely friends. welcome back to recovered-ish.today’s episode is a little different.i was feeling kind of chaotic, kind of scattered, and i knew i did not have it in me to do justice to one of the bigger, heavier topics i had planned. so instead, i did something i honestly never thought i would do.i pulled out my old journals.the actual journals i kept from the depths of my eating disorder through therapy, residential treatment, php, iop, and early recovery. five full books of wild thoughts, assignments, fears, honesty, and things i didn’t even want to say out loud at the time.so in this episode, i’m reading them with you.in this episode, i talk about: – the lies my eating disorder told me – the illusion of control it promised – what the eating disorder was giving me at the time – what it was quietly taking away – identity loss in recovery – why anger can be such a powerful emotion in healing – recovery assignments that actually helped – the moment i started imagining a future in a different body – what it looked like to slowly find myself againthere are definitely moments in this episode that are funny. there are also moments that really got me.more than anything, i hope it makes you feel less alone.because if you’ve ever felt like your thoughts were too weird, too dark, too obsessive, too much for anyone else to understand, i promise you are not the only one.support beyond the podcast if you want more structure and support in your recovery, Recovery Skills Training is my step by step program that helps you build real momentum with food, body image, coping, identity, and recovery skills that actually stick.use code PODCAST for $57 off 👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/ follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloedon’t forget to eat your food.Resources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hello, lovely friends! welcome back to recovered-ish.today we’re talking about body changes in recovery and how to cope when weight gain starts to feel huge.because of course this is one of the biggest fears in recovery. most people would be willing to take the risk on healing if they could guarantee their body would stay the same. but that’s not how this works. and even when you know logically that your body may need to change, that does not mean you’re going to feel emotionally okay about it.in this episode, i talk about: – why body changes feel uniquely hard in the current social climate – the way beauty standards keep swinging and why that matters – how i coped early on by making body change a “future chloe problem” – why avoidance can help at first and also backfire later – the difference between flooding yourself versus gradually learning to tolerate change – why i do not think loving your body is a requirement for recovery – why body positivity didn’t fully land for me – how making the body less important changed everything – the identity piece underneath the fear of weight gain – why the real question is often “who will i be if i’m no longer the small one, the fit one, the disciplined one?”i also share what actually helped me most. not trying to force myself to love the way i looked. not convincing myself my body was beautiful every second. but building a life that mattered more than my body did.if you’ve ever thought, “i know my body might need to change, but i don’t know how to handle that without spiraling,” this episode is for you.support beyond the podcast if you’re ready for more structured support, Recovery Skills Training is my step by step program for eating disorder recovery.use code PODCAST for $57 off👉https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloeResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hello, lovely friends. welcome back to recovered-ish.today we’re talking about quasi recovery.this is the phase where you’re not relapsed. you’re functioning. you’re eating. life looks mostly normal.but the tape is still running.in this episode, i talk about:– what quasi recovery actually is (and how it’s different from relapse) – the “good enough” space that can last for years – rigidity that hides inside normal routines – the identity piece that keeps people stuck – why this phase often gets socially rewardedi also share my own quasi recovery story — including the years i secretly went vegan and didn’t tell my dietitian. it looked aligned. it also kept me safe.we walk through the questions that help you know if you’re in this space and the first practical steps to start getting out.if you’ve ever thought, “i’m not relapsed… but i’m not fully free either,” this episode is for you.support beyond the podcastif you’re ready for more structured support, my 8-week group program the Quasi Recovery Exit is open now!👉 https://recover-with-chloe.moxieapp.com/public/quasi-recovery-exit-applicationfollow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloedon’t forget to eat your food.Resources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hello, lovely friends! welcome back to recovered-ish.today we’re talking about motivation. and more specifically, why it feels so hard to find motivation to recover.i hear this all the time. “i don’t feel motivated.” “i don’t have a strong enough reason.” “i know what to do, but i can’t make myself do it.”and the more i sat with this topic, the more i realized something.motivation works beautifully inside an eating disorder.there are goals. numbers. boxes to check. clear cause and effect. you restrict and you feel less guilt. you hit a number and your brain gives you a dopamine spike. accomplishment feeds motivation. motivation feeds accomplishment.it’s a loop.so when we flip the script and say okay, now i’m going to do the opposite of everything that felt concrete and measurable and “safe,” it makes sense that motivation suddenly disappears.in this episode, i talk about:– why eating disorders are incredibly motivating – how accomplishment and dopamine wire you in – how self hatred can also fuel motivation – why recovery feels harder to initiate – the belief underneath recovery which is “i am deserving of care” – why mindset work alone rarely moves the needle – why action has to come before belief – why motivation is not sustainable – what actually carries you forward when motivation failsi also share more of my own story. the false promises my eating disorder made. the flashes of clarity that didn’t last. the fear of being trapped in my own brain. the anger that finally pushed me to take action.and then we get to the two things that actually move recovery forward long term.trust. and risk taking.if motivation feels unreliable for you right now, this episode is for you.support beyond the podcastif you’re ready to stop waiting for motivation and start building real momentum, Recovery Skills Training walks you through the actual doing of recovery. nourishment. movement. coping. support. identity. step by step.you can get $57 off with code PODCAST.👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/ follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloeResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hi, my lovely friends. welcome back to recovered-ish.this week’s episode is messy. i’m congested. there’s construction beeping outside my office. it’s a full comedy of errors. but honestly… that feels fitting. recovery is messy too.i did a poll on instagram and you all had so many good questions that i couldn’t pick just one. so we’re doing a recovery buffet. a little bit of this, a little bit of that. not a deep dive feast. just honest, off-the-cuff answers.in this episode, we talk about:– how to let go of control when guilt shows up immediately– why the eating disorder is actually the thing controlling you– channeling your “control” into places that serve you instead of hurt you– body acceptance vs body neutrality vs body respect– whether you “have to eat that much” in recovery if you’re not underweight– starting therapy when only 1% of you wants to recover– handling countertransference as a recovered clinician– how to get a diagnosis if you’re an “unconventional” presentation– how to actually take action instead of just consuming recovery content– calories on menus (short answer: hate it)– why feeling guilty after eating normally does not mean you did something wrong– what to do if higher level of care didn’t work for youwe also talk a lot about guilt. how guilt isn’t proof. how you can’t trust it right now. how sometimes eating what your body needs is going to feel bad — and that doesn’t mean it’s wrong.if you’re stuck on the edge of starting. if you’re eating “normally” but feeling awful about it. if you’re trying to let go of control and it feels impossible.this episode is for you.support beyond the podcast:if you’re ready to move from insight to implementation, Recovery Skills Training is my step-by-step course that walks you through the actual doing of recovery. nourishment. movement. coping. support. identity.you can get $57 off with code PODCAST.👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/ follow along on instagram:@recoverwithchloeResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hi. welcome back to recovered-ish.this episode is about relapse and why i don’t think it means what we’ve been taught to believe it means.relapse is extremely common. and the fact that it’s so common tells me a few things. this is really hard. success in recovery isn’t well defined. and we haven’t figured out eating disorder treatment as well as we think we have.i talk about how relapse usually isn’t accidental. it often has something to do with the nervous system floundering before it finds regulation again. added stress. familiar stress returning before you’re ready. leaving treatment too soon. needing safety again.i also share parts of my own history including a relapse that’s more recent than i’d like to admit and a lot of near misses along the way. lapses. trips that could’ve turned into tumbles. the messy middle that lasts longer than people talk about.we talk about what actually helps when relapse shows up. not panic. not shame. going back to basics. being honest as soon as possible. and re evaluating recovery using the five pillars i come back to again and again. nourishment. movement. support. coping. identity.⚠️ content note this episode is intentionally non graphic. no numbers. no detailed behaviors.in this episode, we talk about: – why relapse is so common – the difference between a lapse and a relapse – nervous system overwhelm and regulation – why relapse isn’t a moral failure – my own relapse and near miss experiences – what actually helps you come back – using the five pillars to reorient recoveryif you’re in a relapse right now, scared you’re heading toward one, or wondering if what you’re experiencing counts, i hope this episode helps you feel a little less alone and a little less panicked.support beyond the episode if you want structure and tools to support your recovery, i created Recovery Skills Training. it’s a step by step course that helps you build real skills around nourishment, movement, coping, support, and identity so you’re not just relying on willpower.you can get $57 off with code PODCAST. 👉 Recovery Skills Training » Powered by ThriveCartfollow me on instagram: @recoverwithchloeResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

today we’re covering one of the most confusing and emotionally loaded topics in eating disorder recovery:exercise.because movement can genuinely help anxiety.and it can also quietly become another way the eating disorder stays in control.in this episode, we talk about the role exercise plays in eating disorders, why stopping movement can feel terrifying, and how to tell the difference between moving to feel connected vs moving to control your body.i also share my personal relationship with exercise — from loving movement as a kid, to compulsive exercise in my eating disorder, to why i needed time away from exercise in treatment before i could ever rebuild a safer relationship with it.this is not a “never exercise again” episode.and it’s not a “just move intuitively” conversation either.it’s a nuanced look at intention, identity, and embodiment — and how to know when exercise is supporting recovery versus quietly running it.⚠️ content notethis episode is intentionally non-triggering:no numbers (weight, calories, vitals)no detailed behaviorsno body comparison or before/after contentin this episode, i talk about:– the “ED to gym girly pipeline”– how exercise can become compensatory– when movement shifts from regulating to controlling– identity and morality around being “disciplined” or “healthy”– why motivation matters more than the movement itself– why some people need a full break from exercise in recovery– my treatment experience with stopping and reintroducing movement– yoga, embodiment, and reconnecting with the body– how to recognize when exercise is becoming disordered again– questions to assess your relationship with movement⏱️ episode timestamps0:00 Intro2:45 Why Exercise Is So Confusing in Recovery9:20 My Early Relationship With Movement13:30 When Exercise Became Compulsive18:30 Exercise as Compensation23:10 Identity, Morality, and “Discipline”28:20 Treatment, Rest, and Why I Had to Stop34:00 Reintroducing Movement Safely39:45 When the Eating Disorder Wakes Back Up43:15 Exercise Relationship Audit49:30 Closing Reflectionssponsor / resourcesRecovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recoveryget $57 off with code PODCAST👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.comfollow along on instagram:@recoverwithchloeResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

hi! welcome back to recovered-ish.this episode is about one of the most common thoughts that keeps people stuck in eating disorders:it’s not that bad.it could be worse.i’m not sick enough for help.we talk about where this belief comes from, why it feels so convincing, and how it’s reinforced by medical providers, mental health systems, social media, and comparison — even when someone’s inner world is completely consumed by food, body, and fear.i also share personal stories from my own experience, including being complimented on my body at a moment when i was close to asking for help, and later being told by a doctor that i was healthy despite being the most sick — moments that delayed care when i was deeply unwell.⚠️ content notethis episode is intentionally non-graphic:no numbers (weight, calories, vitals)no detailed behaviorsno body comparison or before/after contentin this episode, i talk about:– how eating disorders often begin from a well-intentioned place– the “honeymoon phase” where restriction can feel rewarding– when it stops feeling good and starts taking over– why physical markers aren’t reliable indicators of severity– medical and mental health invalidation– gaps in provider education around eating disorders– social media and the “not sick enough” comparison spiral– the eating disorder’s agenda and why it survives on delay– anosognosia (loss of insight) and why it’s so dangerous– wanting your pain to be visible– why you deserve care now, not later⏱️ episode timestamps0:00 Cold Open: The Lie00:40 Introduction03:20 The Honeymoon Phase06:58 When It Stops Feeling Good10:52 My Story: The Beach Compliment12:59 Medical Invalidation14:20 The Mental Illness Reality17:13 Provider Education Gap21:04 Social Media & Recovery Content26:10 The Eating Disorder’s Agenda31:33 Anosognosia: Loss of Insight33:58 Wanting to Be Sick36:55 You Deserve Care Now37:42 Q&A: First Steps in Recoverysponsor / resourcesRecovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program for eating disorder recoveryget $57 off with code PODCAST👉 https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.c...follow along on instagram:@recoverwithchloeResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

in this episode, we’re talking about the fear of weight gain — and why you can’t just “get over it.”if you’ve ever thought i want recovery, but i can’t handle my body changing, this episode is for you.we unpack why weight gain can feel like danger (not just discomfort), how avoidance wires fear, and why waiting to feel “okay” before taking action keeps people stuck for years.i also want to name this clearly: i recovered into a smaller body, and that comes with privilege. my experience is not universal. the fear, however, is something many of us share — and it deserves compassion, not shame.in this episode, we cover:why weight gain fear feels paralyzing, not superficialhow avoidance makes food and body change feel unsafethe identity layer behind the fear (being “the small one,” the disciplined one, the acceptable one)thinness as protection in a cruel culturewhy you can’t think your way out of this fearwhy exposure — not confidence — is what actually reduces fearwhy body neutrality is a win (you don’t need body love to recover)the moment i accidentally saw my weight years into recovery — and what it taught metakeaway i want you to sit with:you don’t have to want your body to change.you don’t have to feel ready.you don’t have to love your body.actually, recovery happens when you do it afraid.fear in one hand. fork in the other.if this episode brought up insight, familiarity, or emotion — i’d love to hear from you. dm me or leave a comment wherever you’re listening. this podcast is a conversation.follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloeCreators + resources:i’m linking a few creators and clinicians i deeply respect who speak about recovery, body change, and weight stigma from perspectives beyond my own — including diverse body sizes, racial identities, and queer experiences:shira rosenbluth, lcsw — eating disorder therapist speaking openly about recovery into a larger bodydr. rachel millner — body trust provider focusing on fear, safety, and weight stigmafood psych podcast (christy harrison) — recovery, culture, and weight stigma conversationssonya renee taylor — body liberation through racial justice and collective healingmegan jayne crabbe — lived recovery experience and body change narrativesResources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

in this episode, i share my eating disorder + recovery story — but not in the “before/after, numbers, shock value” way. i’m not here to give you content you can compare yourself to. i’m here to give you context, meaning, and the parts that actually matter.i talk about the early moments where body awareness and objectification started showing up way before food did, how perfectionism and high achievement shaped my brain, and how passion (for me: musical theatre) quietly morphed into an eating disorder before i even realized what was happening.this episode is about the function of the eating disorder — not just what it looked like.important note before you listeni do not share weights, numbers, behavior details, or “sick photos.” my goal is for you to leave feeling less alone, not more activated.in this episode, we cover:the earliest body memory i can still remember (and why it mattered)how objectification and “being perceived” can wire body shame earlyperfectionism: not the drive to achieve — the fear of failingpassion + obsession: how a “good trait” can become a risk factorthe perfect storm: temperament + stress + environment (college, change, isolation)how my eating disorder became intertwined with identity and performancethe moment i realized i had achieved my dream… and felt trapped by ithow the eating disorder functioned like an escape hatch (and why that’s so hard to let go of)what actually helped: support, treatment, and building a life i didn’t need to be saved fromthe question i want you to sit with: what is your eating disorder doing for you?sponsor / resources mentionedif you want real tools (not just insight), Recovery Skills Training is my step-by-step program that teaches the skills of recovery: food guilt, fear, identity, internal leadership, exercise, real-life situations, and more.get $57 off with code PODCAST: https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/follow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloe (instagram.com/recoverwithchloe)timestamps 00:00 intro + how i’m sharing this safely02:34 why “ed storytime” can be harmful06:06 early body awareness12:27 perfectionism + high achievement15:12 passion → disorder18:47 the perfect storm in college25:04 broadway + identity crisis30:15 the eating disorder as an emergency exit32:54 treatment + recovery37:34 the questions39:12 closing thoughtsif anything in this episode brings up insight, familiarity, or emotion — i’d love to hear from you. comment wherever you’re listening, or DM me your thoughts. your story matters too.Resources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube! 

welcome to the first episode of recovered-ish.in this episode, i share why i started this podcast, what recovered-ish actually means, and why the idea of “full recovery” isn’t as clear-cut as we’re often told.i’m 30 years old, over a decade into eating disorder recovery, and both a therapist and recovery coach. if you asked me today whether i’m fully recovered, my answer wouldn’t be a simple yes or no — and that nuance is exactly what this episode explores.this conversation focuses on the messy middle of recovery. the part that rarely gets talked about. the years where life expands and gets more meaningful, while food and body thoughts can still show up.in this episode, we cover:why i named this podcast recovered-ishwhy recovery isn’t linear and doesn’t have one finish linethe pressure to be “fully recovered” and how it can backfirehow perfectionism sneaks into recoveryredefining recovery in a way that’s sustainable and realwhat progress actually looks like without chasing perfectionsponsor / resources mentionedif this episode resonates and you want more structure, tools, and support, check out Recovery Skills Training — my step-by-step program that teaches the practical skills of eating disorder recovery.get $57 off with code PODCAST: https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/timestamps00:00 intro to recovered-ish 00:25 why i started this podcast 02:20 the reality of eating disorder recovery 03:15 is full recovery even possible? 05:24 my personal recovery journey 11:44 perfectionism in recovery 15:05 redefining what recovery means 20:16 learning to stay in the process 29:11 final thoughts + what’s nextfollow along on instagram: @recoverwithchloeif you’ve ever felt stuck in the in-between or questioned whether you’re doing recovery “right,” this episode is for you.Resources + Connect with Me:Instagram: @recoverwithchloeRecovery Skills Training: use code PODCAST for $57 off!Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple PodcastsSubscribe on YouTube!