Episodes
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Beta Valentine – Heartiste
Every male reader of the Chateau needs to see this movie, if for no other reason than to absorb the lessons it offers as a cautionary tale. *BLUE Valentine*
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The Look Of Confidence – Heartiste
Self-satisfaction will see a man through all sorts of tribulations. Radiating confidence, deserved or irrational, is what is most attractive to women. This man looks confident, and his wife stands by him. She has the mousy, hunched over posture of a woman in love. All else that’s objectively...
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A Father's Question – Heartiste
As a responsible father the setbacks you most want your son to avoid are: One-itis. LJBF. Surprise dumpings. Grinding celibacy. Divorce. Marriage to an ugly feminist. Give him the knowledge and tools to circumvent those unhappy fates and the wisdom of your experience and you will be a hero to him...
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Why Game Is Important For Fathers – Heartiste
My only advice I have for the young man who emailed me: 1. Stop beating up on yourself and acting so goddamned melodramatic. You have much insight for your age. Your intelligence will take you far. Now what you need is calm and wisdom. 2. This too shall pass. 3. The big picture trumps the little...
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The Limits of Game – Heartiste
Now, instead of toiling for years as a cog in the machine, giving til it hurt, to win the heart of a marriageable woman in a socially-approved manner, men were, in effect, mimicking the traditional alpha male through a process of data compression. The confident body language and cocky humor of…
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Two Exceptions To Game – Heartiste
The girl you are dating is head over heels in love with you: you are in the do-no-wrong zone, my friend... There’s a catch -- this magic window only lasts about three months... The downside with this scenario is that you have to date at least two points lower than your market value equivalent.
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The Perfect Christmas Gifts For Your Girlfriends – Heartiste
The Chateau Gift-Buying Guide. If she is a mistress: Something perishable, like a dinner or bouquet of flowers. You don’t want evidence of your infidelity lingering on either you or her. Upside: Keeps her expectations low. If you give her expensive stuff she’ll assume you’re thinking of leaving...
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Undercover Orbiter Strategy – Heartiste
Maximize your odds of a bang with the torment of your dreams: 1. Always talk about the girls you are dating, fucking, or seeking the same from to your girl “friend”. 2. Limit your friendzone time to drinking, shows, art exhibits, and house parties. 3. Immediately and without qualification change...
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Betas can Find Love too – Heartiste
My suggestions for how losers in love can turn their fortunes around without lowering their standards: 1. Travel to an economically depressed second tier country like Russia or its East European neighbors where the culture is not too different and the women are known hot commodities. Downside:...
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The Easiest Way To Bang A Hot Chick – Heartiste
As the “negative” traits accumulate, the odds of hot girl sex increase exponentially rather than linearly. 1) Over 25. Odds increase by: +10% for each additional year, -20% at age 30, and +30% for ages 31 and up. 2) Single Mom. Odds increase by: 50% for the first kid, 85% if a Downs Syndrome kid,...
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Owning A Dog Is Training For Owning A Woman – Heartiste
Like dogs, women will walk all over you if you let them. Like dogs, women will test you for your alpha status the moment you show weakness. Like dogs, women need to be trained. Like dogs, women respond best to strong verbal and nonverbal commands. Like dogs, women will eventually take to the…
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Ectomorph. The Right Game For Your Body Type, Part 3 – Heartiste
Ectomorphs also have major pickup flaws which they must address, or they will find the game of love to be a mountain too high to climb. 1. An immobilizing hesitancy to approach girls or open sets. 2. An inability to react promptly to shit tests. 3. Calibration. 4. Alpha male voice and body...
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Mesomorph. The Right Game For Your Body Type, Part 2 – Heartiste
The mesomorph is your classic aloof, asshole alpha male. He’s not trying to be an inconsiderate jerk - well, not always - he just is... Because the mesomorph is a man of occasionally thoughtless action, direct game will be his bread and butter... Mesomorphs’ love for action and escalation means...
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Endomorph. The Right Game For Your Body Type, Part 1 – Heartiste
In summary, endomorph game should be adapted toward building value through social fearlessness, humor, deep rapport and savvy group set management. Endomorphs will rarely get AMOG'ed because they are so friendly and sincere – and lacking in threatening mesomorphic musculature – that they put…
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She Insulted You. What Now? – Heartiste
“Hey! I said... don’t use that fucking word with me again...... Got it?” The next twenty minutes, she is withdrawn, her demeanor chastened and her arms modestly crossed in her lap. You swivel to face the group and smile warmly. Instead of forcing the conversation to return to an artificial...
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What Is Anti-Game? – Heartiste
Anti-game is trivial. 1. get misty-eyed at emotional shit. 2. bore her with details. 3. constantly let her re-frame. 4. buy her drinks, outside of a date context. 5. compliment her gratuitously. 6. talk about your hobbies with oblivious enthusiasm. 7. never ask her a question. 8. never look away....
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Teasing Should Be Like Breathing – Heartiste
When a girl asks you to do something for or with her, instead of following her request to the tee you should be thinking how you can screw around with her expectation.
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Penis Pic Game – Heartiste
Maxim #91. Women will screech louder the closer your words get to damaging or exposing vulnerabilities in their sexual market value. Basic rules of engagement: 1. You don’t have to send a pic of your own penis. 2. If you send a pic of your own penis with authenticity in mind, make sure you are...
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Stealing Bait From Women Fishing For Compliments – Heartiste
Women who make it obvious they are fishing for compliments generally fall in three main camps: 1. Hot babes who live and die by continual positive feedback on either their beauty - from aloof men they like - or their personality/smarts - from women and men who only recognize them for their…
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“I have a police record. What do I tell girls?” – Heartiste
If you are truly worried that your police record will cost you lays and love, you should consider the misinformation move. Just toss out a nickname you go by so that she can’t find your record online. If, at some distant future date, you and her are still together, you may reveal the full extent…
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The Love Test, A Routine – Heartiste
Six questions: 1. “You have a lover, a man who is everything to you. He lives apart from you, but within walking distance. One day you decide to visit him. You have two paths you can take to get to his home. One is a short but boring path that will get you there quickly. The other is a long but...
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Tard Game – Heartiste
“The way he handles the hot girls in my office is nothing short of amazing.” “How so?” “Girls will go up to him and say ‘Good morning, Joe!’, and Joe will bark back ‘You’re crazy don’t even talk to me!'” “Wow. Nuclear neg.” “If a girl says ‘Hi’ to him, he’ll say ‘Don’t kiss me, I have a...
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Seducing Women Is A Children's Game – Heartiste
Children’s games that you should play with women you intend to bang: 1. The Repeating Game. 2. Tag. 3. Stop Touching Me. 4. Simon Says. 5. Sidewalk Cracks. 6. Thumb Wrestling. If she punches you after losing, she’s D.T.F.
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How To Remain Unflustered Like An Alpha Male – Heartiste
Here are some actions and lines you can use when a woman has challenged you - and revealed her blossoming attraction for you. You have to be a bit of an actor to pull some of these off, but seduction is, in its essence, the art of acting... The key to many of these is a bemused or neutral facial...
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The Feminism Shit Test – Heartiste
GIRL: what do you think of feminism? You. – great for my sex life! – child’s play. – it’s like religion. makes people feel good. – great! girls buy me drinks now. – dunno. never ate one. – fucking LOVE it. premarital sex for the win! – you mean lesbianism? – i don’t. – love it. i’d be married if…
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Brushing Off Common Shit Tests From Girls – Heartiste
A big mistake I see a lot of men making -- besides an inability to recognize a shit test when it is leveled at them -- is sounding spiteful in response. The critical distinction to make when volleying a shit test is to avoid confusing sneering umbrage for cocky indifference. The line is...
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The Subtle Art Of The Insidious Neg – Heartiste
You’ll note three things in my response. 1) I didn’t back off from my initial assertion. Nothing kills tingles faster than defensiveness or apologia. 2) I continued the ruse under the assumption that my insidious neg was actually a compliment. 3) I added the qualifier “usually” as a means of...
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Raising Your Value By Telling Women You Have Stalkers – Heartiste
Pre-selection comes in many flavors. 1. Be seen in the company of beautiful women. 2. Embed references to women in stories about yourself. 3. Allude to competitor women attracted to you, but without bragging. Classic D.H.V. – demonstration of higher value.
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Cheap And Easy Ways To Raise Your Value To A Girl – Heartiste
Don’t call back right away. Never buy better gifts for her. Dress better than her on random days. Take frequent leaves of absence. Preferably international. Drag your feet about introducing her to your friends and family. Never give her spare keys to your place. Don’t live together. Subtly...
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Statements That Imply Your Higher Value – Heartiste
“You’re very brave to come over to talk with me.” *** “Your flirting is charming.” *** “As we’re sitting here talking I can tell you seem really happy.” *** “Wow! Don’t get too excited.” *** “Hmm. Your hands are shaking.” *** “Hope I didn’t make you wait too long.” *** “Your answers tell me that...
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Two Words Women Love To Hear – Heartiste
“It’s complicated.” Commit it to memory and deploy liberally. *** GIRL: So are you dating anyone right now? YOU: It’s complicated. *** GIRL: Just how many girls have you been with? YOU: It’s complicated. *** GIRL: What are you looking for? YOU: It’s complicated. *** GIRL: Will you buy me a drink?...
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'I Have A Boyfriend' Responses – Heartiste
Girl: “I have a boyfriend.....” Man: “Wow....amazing...seriously, that’s amazing!” Girl: “What? That I have a boyfriend?” Man: “No, that I’ve barely known you for 5 minutes and you’re already telling me your problems.” Girl: “l.m.a.o.!” *** “Whoa, not so fast. We’re just talking here, ok? Don’t…
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Drive-By Teases – Heartiste
Examples: Flush the toilet when she’s in the shower. Snap wet towel at her butt. Should just barely cross line of genuine pain. “Happy Valentine’s Day!” Give her a wrapped box of condoms. Put a “pinch my butt” post-it note on her back as she’s heading out for work. Slip her car into neutral when...
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Flirty Quips To Female Small Talk – Heartiste
Warning. Do not use on fat chicks. They may get the wrong idea. *** GIRL: “What time is it?” A good time. GIRL: “You came in late today.” Hard drug use. GIRL: “Which way is it to X?” You don’t seem like the kind of girl who’d go there. GIRL: “How are you?” Irresistible. GIRL: “Could you watch my...
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A Short List Of Street Openers – Heartiste
“Excuse me, I have to get to a meeting that’s going to change my life, but I think you’re gonna change it, too. Let me have your number, I’ll call you later and we’ll see if I’m right.” *** I have a friend who brings his dog to the bar. Inevitably, girls come up, start playing with the dog, and...
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My Personal Pickup Openers – Heartiste
NOT “pickup lines”: *** 1. How would you react if your boyfriend gave you an ultimatum? 2. Why do girls check out other girls more than they check out guys? ... 4. You look like the type who would date a starving artist, but marry a doctor. 5. Let’s say you were dating this guy for a while, fell…
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Curiosity, Women, And Game – Heartiste
My advice to the naturally incurious man: 1. Find an equally incurious girl. 2. Push yourself out of your incurious comfort zone... For instance, instead of taking your girl out to dinner next Saturday like every other herbling, go indoor rock climbing with her. The ensuing rush - kept in check…
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Opportunity Is Everywhere – Heartiste
It doesn’t matter if you don’t have the wittiest opener, or the smoothest delivery. If you open your mouth and say something as benign as “Hi” to thirty-eight attractive girls on a single Saturday, you will have rocketed yourself ahead of 99% of men who passed by those same girls and said...
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Motivation & Pre-Game CR – Heartiste
THE ONLY ADVICE YOU’LL EVER NEED. 1. Chicks dig power. 2. Don’t date. 3. Never pay. 4. Play by your own rules. 5. He who hesitates, masturbates. 6. Better to pursue lots of women until you find one willing to go all the way right away than to waste a month on a tease. 7. Women want to be seduced....
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Stray Thoughts On The Nature Of The Game – Heartiste
Don’t answer all of a girl’s questions, especially when it feels like you are being interrogated. *** The best reason to learn game is that it is a shortcut to a woman’s pussy and heart. *** When the revelation that there is nothing after this life but the illimitable black void is grasped,...
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Sexbot Update – Heartiste
Youtube comment: "The day humans will stop existing is just around a hundred years after the first realistic sex robot hits the market." Unless reproduction is industrialized and severed from the mating market after the appearance of that first lifelike sexbot, this commenter is likely correct.
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Sexbots – Heartiste
Changes I foresee: Omegas – geeks, nerds, dweebs, trolls, dregs, dullards, bums, street filth – will finally have a satisfying release for their pent-up horniness. Crime will likely drop as a result. So will rayp. Widely available sexbots are analogous to cheap, legal prostitution... Sexbots…
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How To Propose Like An Alpha Male – Heartiste
Alpha move. “Whaddya say we get hitched?” Super-alpha move. “Whaddya say we get hitched, my number one bitch?” Then slip this ring on her finger: **Tiny diamond inside** Alpha move. Walk up behind her, wrap your arms around her, lean over her shoulder, and while placing the ring box into her hand...
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Why Sluts Make Bad Wives – Heartiste
Basically gentlemen, if you want to beat the sordid odds and enter a marriage with a less than 50% likelihood it will end in divorce, you need to date virgins or girls who have had only one partner before you. Good luck with that! Of course, you can do as the Chateau recommends and skip out on...
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Long-Term Cohabitation Is Just As Good As Marriage – Heartiste
1. Unmarried men in long-term relationships receive just as many health and happiness benefits as married men. The crucial variable is... the love. 2. Unmarried, cohabiting men enjoy the pleasure of thinner lovers than the fat wives enjoyed by married men. 3. Unmarried players are just as desired...
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The Lie Of Locking Her In – Heartiste
"I have to lock her in because the snatch must flow." As any dead-eyed married man will tell you, the sex is always hottest until that first bite of wedding cake. Fact. Once in a secure relationship (and nothing is more secure for a woman than marriage -- the law sees to that) a woman’s sex drive...
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Don't Get Married – Heartiste
To recap: 1. divorce theft. 2. monogamy. 3. second class spouse under the law. 4. sex once a month TOPS with the same old pussy.
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Marriage vs LTR's – Heartiste
Let’s compare two men. Man 1 abjures marriage. At the end, he wheezes his last with memories of hundreds of women -- of their loving ministrations and tender caresses and fleeting intimacies between window blind shafts of sunlight -- dancing through his head, and in the company of a nebulous…
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Sweetness – Heartiste
Sweetness is defined as robbing a girl of the satisfaction of walking away from a failing relationship with the upper hand. It means stealing her thunder when she wants to be the dumper. There are two ways to do this, and both require presence of mind to accurately assess when she is about to…
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Leaving Her Better Than You Found Her? Not Likely. – Heartiste
When women get dumped, they do not become better people or happier people. They react primarily in one of two ways: 1. She broods and licks her wounds, unleashing her sorrow on girl friends and family. In extreme cases, she will retreat to a corner in her bedroom and gaze at the wall for a few...
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Catholic Mafia currently has 289 episodes available on PodParley. New episodes are automatically indexed when they're published to the podcast feed.
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Sinners becoming Saints.
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