All Episodes
Playing With Fire — 259 episodes
254 How to Figure Out What You Want and Need: An Insider’s Experience of YOO
253 The Shadow of Compersion
252 Triad Life in a World of Couples with Margo, Jody & Chris
251 Trailblazing vs Following: The Hidden Dynamic That May Be Creating Resentment
250 Relationship Re‑Imagination: The Framework
[Replay] 194 Re-Imagining Relationships
249 Is Your Non‑Monogamy Actually Just Two Monogamies?
248 Beyond People-Pleasing: Practicing Healthy Autonomy in Relationships
247 Non-Monogamy, Mono-Mind: The Invisible Scripts Running Your Communication
246 We Opened up Too Fast. What Do We Do Now?
245 Check-Ins That Actually Work
244 But I Feel like I’m Gonna Die: What Happens When Agreements Meet Attachment Panic
243 Making Decisions Together: Permission, Consultation, and Notification in Relationships
242 Betrayal Repair in Non-Monogamy
241 Betrayal & Non-Monogamy with Eve Rickert
[Replay] 222 The Greater the Tension, the Greater the Potential: Individuating in Relationships
240 The Alchemy of Erotic Jealousy & Compersion: A Reverse-Interview with Dr. Marie Thouin & Dr. Joli Hamilton
[Replay] 229 Shadow Work in Relationships: What We Keep From Ourselves
[Replay] 177 Shadow Dance: Navigating Projections in Relationships
[Replay] 105 Shadow Work: What if your monsters were trying to help you live the life you always wanted?
[Replay] 164 I HATE THIS: Get Unstuck with Existential Kink (A shadow work method)
239 Radical Relating with Mel Cassidy
238 Thriving in Long-Distance Relationships
237 The Art & Practice of Shedding Mono-Normativity
236 Co-Creating Magnificent Sex
235 I Think I'm Polyamorous, But I'm in a Monogamous Marriage
234 How to Figure Out What You Want (And Why It’s So Damn Hard)
233 The Case for ‘Boring’ Polyamory
232 How to Keep Going When Non-Monogamy Feels Too Hard
231 The Holiday Survival Guide for Polyamorous People
230 Can Trauma Survivors Do Non-Monogamy?
229 Shadow Work in Relationships: What We Keep From Ourselves
228 “I Only Get the Hard Parts”: Living with Asymmetry in Polyamory and Life
227 Transforming Shame into Love with Jessica Fern and David Cooley
226 The Secret Sauce of Happy Non-Monogamy: Exquisite Transition Management
225 Fears, Hopes, and Aftercare: Preparing for Polycule Gatherings
224 Relationship Anarchy with Dr. Nicole Thompson
223 Recovering From Purity Culture with Lauren Elise Barnes
222 The Greater the Tension, the Greater the Potential: Individuating in Relationships
221 The Art of Reassurance: Relating Through Doubt and Fear
220 How to Finally Hear Each Other: Low vs. High Context Communication
219 A Patient Path into Non-Monogamy with Laura & Bill
218 What will opening up do to us?
217 Jealous right now? Listen to this.
216 Helping Your Partner Through an Intense Moment of Jealousy
215 Nurturing Established Relationship Energy
214 Defying Mononormativity with @Polyamarla
213 Psychedelics and Non-Monogamy with Dr. Nicole Thompson
212 Repair Skills
211 The Drama Triangle: How to Get Unstuck From Your Sticky Fights
210 Non-Monogamy Firsts: Managing Emotions When Your Partner Explores New Experiences
209 Transitioning from Swinging to Polyamory
208 Relationship Anarchy: Tailor-Making ALL Your Relationships with Annie Undone
207 Turning Goals into Self-Agreements
206 The Grief of Jealousy
205 Hierarchy or Priority?
204 Liminality: Your Key to Relationship Paradigm Shifting
203 Money & Non-monogamy: Skip This Episode at Your Own Peril
202 How do we maintain the relationship renaissance after opening up?
201 Lots of fish in the sea, how do I find mine?
200 Episodes Strong: What We've Learned About Love, Business, and Growth
199 Why Verbal Agreements Suck (And Why We Still Use Them)
198 Why does jealousy freak out the nervous system?
197 I Want What They’ve Got: Feeling Envy Towards Your Partner
196 Envy: How to Use It and How to Lose It
195 Help, I’ve Struck Gold: Handling NRE in Two Relationships
194 Re-Imagining Relationships
193 Beyond Good Intentions: Building True Integrity in Relationships
192 [Replay] What would you do with your full power? A conversation about kink, power exchange, and everyday life with Mollena Williams-Haas
191 [Replay] Turn your Toxic Attractions into Psychological Growth with Sunny Megatron
190 [Replay] Shadow work: What if your monsters were trying to help you live the life you always wanted?
189 [Replay] Can my attachment style do non-monogamy?
188 [Replay] Justice Jealousy
187 [Replay] Imago Dialogue: Transforming Conflict into Connection
186 Polyamory in the Second Half of Adulthood with Kathy Labriola
185 Conscious Uncoupling
184 Q&A Quickie: Why get married?
183 Pelvic and Sexual Health for Every Body with Dr. Ariana Cesare
182 Q&A Quickie: What should I do when my partner wants gender-based rules in non-monogamy?
181 Q&A Quickie: Privacy vs. Transparency—How do I feel safer?
180 Hyper-Individualism vs Healthy Autonomy: Am I The A**hole?
179 One Kid’s Reflection on Being Raised by Polyamorous Parents
178 The One to Share with Your Concerned Family Members
177 Shadow Dance: Navigating Projections in Relationships
176 Dismantling Defensiveness
175 Coming Out as Non-Monogamous: Risks, Rewards, & How To Get Ready
174 Social Monogamy: The Impact of Maintaining Your Mono-Image
173 Getting off the Relationship Escalator (Or Choosing Not To)
172 Grieving Change: A Crucial Relationship Skill
171 Why Self-Agreements Will Make or Break Your Relationships
170 Jealousy & Attachment Panic
169 Q&A Quickie: Why am I having such a hard time sticking to my agreements?
168 Ethics, Responsibility, and the Changing Landscape of Non-Monogamy with Eve Rickert and Andrea Zanin
167 Unfuck Your Monomind, Part 2
166 Q&A Quickie: How do I deal with my anxiety when my partner is on a date?
165 Monogamy, In This Economy? with Laura Boyle
164 I HATE THIS: Get Unstuck with Existential Kink (A shadow work method)
163 Playfulness, Vulnerability, and Parenting with Abbey & Liam from Evolving Love
162 Non-Monogamy & Community: Real Stories from YOO
161 Adopting a Polyamorous Lens with Alex Alberto, Author of Entwined
160 Getting Your Needs Met
159 Q&A Quickie: How can I handle my resentment that my partner isn’t into what I want?
158 Desire Discrepancy: What to Do When Your Wants Don’t Align
157 What Is Compersion? with Author Marie Thouin
156 Betrayal Trauma & Non-Monogamy
155 Q&A Quickie: How do we rebuild from lost trust?
154 Research-Backed Therapy for Non-Monogamous People with Dr. River Farrell
153 Limerence vs. New Relationship Energy
152 How to Take Intentional Relationship Breaks
151 Justice Jealousy
150 Asymmetric Agreements: How much balance should we strive for?
149 Relationship Agreements 101
148 Can my attachment style do non-monogamy?
147 How to Build Healthy Differentiation
146 Will non-monogamy make it possible to stay together?
145 How can I handle dysregulation in my relationships?
144 Handling Polyamory Problems: Q&A with Polywise Authors Jessica Fern and David Cooley
143 Consent, Stronger Relationships, and Hotter Sex in a Changing World with Author Dr. Eric FitzMedrud
142 Enmeshment: Are you over-functioning in your relationship?
141 Being Polywise with Jessica Fern and David Cooley
140 [Replay] Balancing Individuation & Secure Attachment with Polysecure Author Jessica Fern
139 Hinge Skills Part 2: How to Go From Squeaky Hinge to Skilled Tapestry Weaver
138 How can I be a better hinge partner?
137 Handling the Stress of Relational Growth
136 Help, I got poly-bombed!
135 Veto Power: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
134 Agreements, Boundaries, and Consequences
133 Doing the Relationship Work
132 Why am I not enough?
131 De-Escalating Relationships with Care
130 Turn Your Toxic Attractions Into Psychological Growth with Sunny Megatron
129 Imago Dialogue: Transforming Conflict into Connection
128 Unfuck Your Mono-Mind
127 Comperstruggle: When Jealousy & Compersion Collide with Dr. Marie Thouin
126 Finding Your People with the Hosts of Normalizing Non-Monogamy, Emma & Fin
125 The Jealousy Roadmap
124 Are you ready to bring your whole quirky self to your relationships? with Rachel Wright
123 Weasel Words and Creating More Intimacy in your Relationships
122 Get The Skills to Build your Own Relationship - With Guest Expert Carrie Jeroslow
121 Am I cut out for non-monogamy? Finding safety during your exploration
120 How do I break through relationship stagnation?
119 Soft Cock Week with guest expert Michelle Renee
118 Are there quick and easy ways to manage stress? A: Yes. With guest experts Elisabeth Kristof, Melanie Weller, and Matt Bush
117 Business and pleasure with Beth Hankes
116 Mindful Dating with guest expert Marie Thouin
115 The Nature of Relating with guest expert Megan Bhatia
114 Non-monogamy is a psychological growth lab: Are you ready?
113 How to do hard things & build exceptional love with Neuro-Somatic Intelligence expert Elisabeth Kristof
112 Sex clubs and more with Ashley Weller from What's Your Position podcast
111 Build Your Relationship Toolkit with guest experts Dedeker, Emily & Jase of the Multiamory podcast
110 How surrogate partner therapy works with guest expert Brian Gibney
109 We Opened Up & EEK! What to do when exciting beginnings turn scary
108 What would you do with your full power? A conversation about kink, power exchange, and everyday life with Mollena Williams-Haas
107 Power dynamics for non-kinksters (part 2) How to share power when you were raised to be an entitled jerk & a martyr
106 The conversation that will change your life: Power dynamics for non-kinksters
105 Shadow work: What if your monsters were trying to help you live the life you always wanted?
104 Help! What can I do with all my feelings when my partner is on a date?
103 How to successfully ask your partner to explore non-monogamy
102 How to find, create, and enjoy non-monogamous community with guest expert Libby Sinback
101 Three ways of being polyamorous
100 Finding relationship happiness through creative projects
99 Balancing individuation & secure attachment with Polysecure author Jessica Fern
98 You're *too much*
97 Jealousy and sexual arousal: getting off on the green-eyed monster!
96 Which is better: To open from the start or to establish couplehood first?
95 Envisioning Your Dream Relationship
94 Romantic Friendships: Subversive & Awesome
93 [MOST POPULAR EPISODE replay] Relationship agreements in the wild
92 Finding help and hope during your shift from monogamy to polyamory
91 How to deal with criticism so it doesn't ruin your relationships with Dr. Jessica Higgins
90 How to make exciting relationship changes less scary
89 Which relationship style is right for you? Learn the taxonomy of non-monogamy
88 How do I build sensual & sexual desire?
87 Is polyamory practical? with guest Laura Boyle
86 Stop compromising in your intimate relationships.
85 How can I feel more compersion? with Dr. Marie Thouin
84 How to have happier relationships using Neuro-Somatic Intelligence
83 How to heal from jealousy and envy
82 Choosing an individuation relationship with or without your partner
81 Here's why we are Playing with Fire!
80 Creating conscious, compassionate, open relationships with guest author Kate Loree, LMFT
79 Expansive Intimacy with Jim Young, The Centered Coach
78 How, When & Why to Visit a Pleasure-Centered Shop with Beth Hankes from Earth & Salt
77 Naturally attract the partners you long for with guest Allana Pratt
75 Leaving purity culture for a life you love - with guest Lauren Elise Barnes
74 Why is my partner so weird? Wait, why am I so weird?
73 How to start building a designer relationship
72 How to be a classy visitor to a strip club with expert guest Elle Stanger, CSE
71 Doing what you said you'd do: When accountability works and when it doesn't
70 Guest Expert Megan Bhatia: Choosing Polyamory While Raising a Family
69 The Year Of Opening
68 Train Your Nervous System to Transform Your Relationships with Elisabeth Kristof
67 Exploring **Potential** Kinks
66 Who Started It? The Decision to Open Up
65 Relationship Agreement Skills - Shared Values & Relationship Purpose
64 Trust: Building and Rebuilding
63 Relationship Sabotage
62 Wounds & Apologies
61 Relational Individuation: On becoming your Self
60 Making FUN happen in long term relationships
59 What do I do with unrequited hots?
58 Anxiety when you are consensually non-monogamous
57 Affection and Non-sexual Intimacy
56 Creative Monogamy
55 Parenting While Polyamorous
54 Where do we learn the skills of adult friendships?
53 How to be happier when big changes threaten your marriage
52 Sex parties? Yes, sex parties.
51 Let's optimize our sex lives!
50 Where is envy secretly kicking your ass?
49 Using love languages to make the gift-giving season more pleasurable
48 Keeping sex hot over the long term
47 Nuanced Conversations in Polyamory: Secondaries, Solos, and Couple's Privilege
46 How, when, and why to CELEBRATE!
45 Silent agreement - One person's perspective on a sexless marriage
44 Three ways porn has brought us closer together
43 The missing ingredient in boundary work with guest Melissa Hite
42 It's normal to be a messy human in messy relationships. Really, it is.
41 Emotional regulation and co-regulation
40 How to have a productive consensual non-monogamy conversation
39 I want to be consensually non-monogamous: how do I talk to my partner?
38 How jealousy was the best thing that ever happened to me
37 Summer's over... negotiating how we handle getting back to the grind
36 Vacation sex at home
35 How not to let your relationship agreement screw up your relationship
34 Three ways masturbation improves your relationship
33 Individuation Accelerator: What if we don't keep the same beat in our relationship?
32 What do I do when my partner's family is driving me crazy?
31 Threesomes... what to consider before the fun
30 How to go from off-the-rack to custom-designed relationship
29 Letting your partner grow at their own pace
28 Showing up for your partner during heartbreak & grief
27 Relationship agreements in the wild
26 Doesn't this person ever leave?
25 No, really, who IS this person I love?
24 Do I really want my lover to see me?
23 Magic marriage ingredient: Play
22 Relationship flags - red, green, and otherwise
21 A secret weapon for relationship satisfaction
20 What an open relationship *might* look like
19 The shame of a messy beginning
18 Shame & secrecy (and sex!)
17 Sexual Fantasies
16 Relationship agreements and polyamory (or monogamy!)
15 What does intimacy look like if you are non-monogamous?
14 Why polyamory?
13 Celebrating and still learning
12 Feel like a failure when a relationship ends? 3 tools to help ease life's big transitions
11 Making money talk-aboutable
10 Navigating drastically different communication styles
9 Fighting with love...how we relearned how to argue
8 Sex reimagined...with one question
7 How to get what you want for the holiday (or any day!)
6 The courage to want
5 Relationship resilience for the holidays
4 Who the heck IS this person I love?
3 Boundaries at the holidays
2 Empowered relating & holiday stress
1 Wanting more in love (even at the holidays!)