Built, Not Broken

Giving back isn’t just about helping others, it changes you too.In this episode, we talk about the importance of giving back and being part of something bigger than yourself. With Matt participating in Dancing For Special Stars, we get into what the experience has been like, what it’s taught him, and why more people should find ways to get involved in their communities.We also break down why giving back is often overlooked, how it impacts your perspective, and how even small actions can make a real difference.Because sometimes the best way to move forward in your own life is to show up for someone else.LINK TO DONATE: https://fundraise.givesmart.com/vf/26DFSSGF/Fundraiser

You can have everything and still feel empty.We talk about what actually makes a life feel full, why people confuse success with fulfillment, and what really matters at the end of the day.

he more you think, the more stuck you get.In this episode, we talk about overthinking — what it looks like, why it happens, and how it keeps people from taking action. We break down the difference between thinking and doing, how your mind can make things bigger than they are, and what actually helps you get out of your head.Because most people don’t need more answers — they need to move.

How do you know if someone is good for you?We talk red flags, boundaries, and the hard truth about keeping people in your life just because you don’t want to be alone. Not everyone is meant to grow with you, and that’s okay.

In this episode, we talk about where our ideas of masculinity actually come from. Growing up, most of us learn what it means to be a man by watching the people around us — fathers, friends, mentors, and sometimes the wrong influences. Some of those lessons help shape us in good ways, and others we have to unlearn.We talk about the men who influenced us, how addiction, incarceration, and recovery challenged our understanding of masculinity, and what being a man means to us today.Because becoming a man isn’t about pretending to be strong — it’s about learning responsibility, honesty, and growth.

DONATE TO MATT'S DANCING WITH THE SPECIAL STARS: https://fundraise.givesmart.com/vf/26DFSSGF/FundraiserDuring this episode, Matt and Max discuss how important your energy is. How having positive energy can shift the mood of not only yourself but those around you. We also talk about how our energy has changed since recovery and the things we do to maintain it. Your energy is everything, and it can be worked on like a muscle. Don't underestimate the power of positivity.

How are you actually showing up right now - in your relationships, your work, your recovery, your life?In this episode, we unpack what “showing up” really means. Is it effort? Energy? Honesty? Consistency? We talk about the difference between performing and being present, showing up tired versus inspired, and how incarceration, recovery, and re-entry reshaped the way we show up for ourselves and others. We also introduce a new segment - “Rate Your Week” - where we break down where we showed up strong… and where we ghosted ourselves.Because growth isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence.

On today's episode, Max shares the things he is currently struggling with and the tools he uses to push through. Secrets keep you sick, and the first step to working through things is to share honestly. This is part two of a two-part series.Reach out to us at "[email protected]"

On this episode of Built Not Broken, we check in with Matt about some things he is currently struggling with. We dive deep into his current hardships, along with the tools he uses to persevere. This is part one of a two-part series.Reach out to us at "[email protected]"

Isolation is one of the biggest threats to mental health, recovery, and overall well-being - and it often goes unnoticed. In this episode, we talk about why community matters more than ever, how isolation quietly harms people, and how to find healthy connections without settling for unhealthy relationships to avoid being alone. We also break down where real community is built and how to start building it without forcing it.Strength is in connection.

Most people avoid silence without realizing it. The moment things get quiet, we distract ourselves. In this episode, we talk about why silence feels uncomfortable, what it exposes, and how constant stimulation affects mental and emotional control. We also break down practical ways to build tolerance for silence without overthinking it.Because silence isn’t weakness - avoiding it is.

Most people know what would help them feel better, and still avoid it. In this episode, we talk about why that happens. We break down avoidance as a survival strategy, how it quietly keeps people stuck, and the small, practical ways to interrupt the cycle. This conversation isn’t about willpower or discipline; it’s about understanding yourself well enough to move forward.Because growth doesn’t start with motivation. It starts with honesty.

Everyone falls off track. Sometimes that looks like slipping on habits - and sometimes it means relapse. The real danger isn’t the slip itself, but the shame, silence, and spiral that follow. In this episode, we talk honestly about what to do when you fall off track, including relapse, and how to respond without quitting on yourself. We break down why setbacks happen, how shame fuels relapse, and the practical steps that help you stabilize, reconnect, and move forward.Because progress isn’t about never falling - it’s about coming back.

Everyone wants something: better habits, more peace, stronger relationships, better health. But most goals fall apart because people don’t plan for what gets in the way. In this episode, we break down the WOOP method, which stands for Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan - a simple, science-backed framework that helps turn intentions into action.This isn’t just for recovery. It’s for anyone trying to change anything - and tired of starting over.

Every year people make New Year’s resolutions - and every year most of them fall apart. In this episode, we break down why that happens and how to set goals that actually stick. We talk about SMART goals, why vague motivation isn’t enough, and how to build realistic goals that support recovery, mental health, and real life.This isn’t about “new year, new you.” It’s about clarity, consistency, and becoming someone you trust - one small, intentional step at a time.

In this episode, we talk about how to survive Christmas without losing yourself. We cover the pressure to perform happiness, how grief shows up louder during the holidays, ways to protect your sobriety on Christmas Day, and healthy ways to celebrate that don’t drain you emotionally or mentally.This is about redefining celebration, protecting your peace, and getting through the season honestly - not perfectly.Because sometimes the best way to celebrate is to take care of yourself.

In this episode, we talk about what it really means to become someone you trust. We break down how addiction and chaos destroy self-trust, why rebuilding it is essential for recovery and mental health, and the simple, practical habits that help you prove to yourself that you’re reliable again.Because when you trust yourself, everything else gets steadier.

In this episode, we break down Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) - why winter hits so hard emotionally, how it affects recovery, and the science-backed tools that actually help. From light therapy and movement to mindset, connection, and routine, we get real about staying steady when the days get dark.Because winter might be heavy - but you don’t have to carry it alone.

Today, we sit down with Dormen H. Lisby Sr., a man who served 25 years and 8 months in the Pennsylvania Department of Corrections and came home determined to rebuild his life with purpose, service, and discipline. Dormen shares what it was like to grow up inside the system, how time in segregated housing shaped him, and how he transformed from survival mode into a man grounded in faith, creativity, leadership, and emotional sobriety.While inside, he became a Certified Peer Support Specialist, served as a deacon, lifted weights religiously, taught in the education department, and found deep purpose through the arts, including having his drawings published by Shining Light. Today, he’s a full-time Program Specialist and Lead Facilitator for Shining Light’s Academy, helping others change their lives from the inside out. We talk about discipline, accountability, identity, recovery, creativity, the trauma of isolation, and what it really takes to become the man you were supposed to be.This is a story about resilience, faith, service, and transformation, proof that your past does not define your future.IF YOU WANT TO DONATE, OR REACH OUT TO DORMEN ABOUT HIS ART INSTALATION, YOU CAN REACH HIM AT [email protected]

In this episode, we talk about how to handle the holidays sober - one of the hardest seasons for anyone in recovery. We break down why the holidays are full of triggers, family stress, and drinking culture, and we share real, practical tools to stay grounded, prepared, and sober through it all.Tools we go over: 1) Make a plan before you go. 2) Have a script ready. 3) Bring your own drink.4) Identify your exit strategy. 5) Tap into your support system. 6) Expect triggers. Don't fear them. 7) Protect your peace.8) Change your environment. 9) Have a "Safe Person" at the event.10) Celebrate the next day. Because the holidays don’t have to be a relapse.They can be a reminder of how far you’ve come.

In this episode, we break down the 11 Shining Light Community Codes - the values that shaped us in and after incarceration, and still guide how we move through recovery, relationships, and community today.The 11 codes...1. Be Open, Be Curious2. Brush Off the Small Stuff3. Accept Non-Resolution4. Start Simple5. "Speak Life"6. One Mic7. Step Forward/Step Back8. Speak from the "I"9. Debate the Topic, Not the Person10. Listen and Learn Before Offering Advice11. Confidentiality. We talk about what each code looks like in real life: from “Be Open, Be Curious” and “Start Simple” to “Speak Life,” “One Mic,” and “Confidentiality.” We share where we’ve lived these codes well, where we’ve failed, and how they’ve helped us build something solid instead of slipping back into chaos.Because strong men aren’t built by accident. They’re built by the codes they live by.

In this episode, we talk about The Energy You Keep - how the people, places, and habits in your life can either protect your peace or poison it. We share our own experiences with changing our circles, setting boundaries, and learning how to be intentional with who we let influence us.Because your peace is sacred - and it’s up to you to protect it.

In this episode, we talk about emotional sobriety - how to stay grounded when your emotions try to take over. We break down what emotional relapse looks like, why stress and isolation are the biggest triggers, and the real tools that help you regulate, reset, and respond instead of react.Because getting sober is one thing, staying emotionally sober - that’s where the real work starts.

In this episode, we break down how to feel better — starting today. From sunlight and movement to food, gratitude, and cleaning your space, we cover the small daily habits that science proves can change your brain chemistry and your mood.Because recovery isn’t just about not falling apart — it’s about building habits that make you feel alive.

In this episode, we talk about kindness — not the fluffy kind, but the kind that takes real strength. We break down what kindness looks like in recovery, in conflict, and in everyday life, and how it’s not about being soft — it’s about staying grounded when your ego wants to react.Because being kind isn’t about being weak. It’s about being in control.

In a world addicted to noise, movement, and distraction, being still might be the hardest thing you’ll ever do.In this episode, we talk about why stillness feels so uncomfortable — especially for people in recovery — and how slowing down forces you to face what’s really going on inside. We share our own experiences with silence, solitude, and the lessons that come when you stop running from yourself.Stillness isn’t doing nothing — it’s learning to sit with what is. It’s where healing begins.10 Tools to Practice Stillness:2-Minute Rule – Start small and build up.Mindful Mornings – Begin the day without your phone.Pause Practice – Breathe before reacting.Movement as Meditation – Walk or stretch in silence.Mind Dump Journaling – Clear your thoughts on paper.Digital Fasts – Unplug daily for 30 minutes.Observe, Don’t Absorb – Notice emotions, don’t become them.5-4-3-2-1 Grounding – Bring yourself back to the present.Scheduled Solitude – Protect alone time.Gratitude in Silence – End your day with three good things.Because sometimes, the loudest growth happens in the quiet.

In this episode, Matt and Max dive into hope as a character strength - not a dream or wish, but a mindset you can choose and build. They explore how hope and mindset shape recovery, the difference between optimism and action, and how to live each day with intentional belief that things can and will get better.Because hope isn’t passive. It’s a practice - and it starts in your mind.

In this episode, we break down why boundaries are the difference between surviving and slipping in recovery. From toxic friendships to family pressure, dating, and even the limits we set with ourselves, we share our own struggles with saying “no” - and why learning to set boundaries has been one of the hardest but most life-saving parts of sobriety.Because boundaries aren’t selfish, they save lives.

We’ve all heard the phrase: “You have to hit rock bottom before you can change.” But it’s not true. In this episode, we unpack the myth of rock bottom, share our own stories, and talk about why waiting to lose everything is dangerous. With overdose and suicide numbers higher than ever, we explore what actually sparks change - and why the best time to get help is now.Because recovery isn’t about how far you fall. It’s about when you choose to rise.

In this episode, we dive into the prejudices and biases people face around race, sexuality, addiction, recovery, and even being a straight white man. We share our own experiences about judgment, talk about the stereotypes we’ve both been boxed into, and get honest about the biases we’ve carried ourselves.Because none of us are just one label. Healing means breaking stigma and seeing each other as human first.

Sobriety doesn’t always mean the addiction is gone — sometimes it just shifts. In this episode, we break down cross-addiction: swapping drugs or alcohol for something else that feels safer but can still take over your life.From food, fitness, and work to relationships and even recovery itself, we share our own stories of falling into new compulsions, why cross-addiction happens, and how to spot the red flags before they control you.Because recovery isn’t just about quitting — it’s about learning to live without always needing a fix.

In this episode, Max opens up about his journey with Alcoholics Anonymous - from the first meeting he almost didn’t attend, to the principles, people, and community that helped him finally get sober. We break down what AA really is (and isn’t), tackle some common misconceptions, and explore why it worked for him.Because in recovery, there’s no one right way - there’s just your way.

In this episode, we dive into the role of character strengths and positive psychology in recovery - a framework Matt uses in his own program. We break down what positive psychology really means, how it shifts focus from what’s “wrong” to what’s strong, and why that matters for anyone healing.We also share our own top character strengths, reflect on how they’ve shaped our recovery journeys, and explore how you can identify and use your strengths to build resilience, gratitude, and purpose in everyday life.Because recovery isn’t just about avoiding the bad - it’s about growing the good.

In our first listener Q&A, we sit down to answer some of the biggest questions you sent us about recovery and mental health. From what sobriety looks like behind bars, to the moment we finally chose change, to how we replaced substances with healthier habits - we’re diving deep.We also share our takes on AA, talk about the mental vs. physical sides of addiction, and reflect on what really makes recovery stick.Because every question deserves an honest answer - and every story has more layers than what you see on the surface.

We grew up thinking mental health was something you kept to yourself - push it down, keep moving, “man up.” The truth? That mindset almost broke us.In this episode, we open up about depression, therapy, shame, anger, and the daily work it takes to stay grounded. We talk about the moments we hit mental rock bottom, the tools that keep us sane, and why asking for help is actually a sign of strength - not weakness.Because real men feel. And real healing starts when you stop pretending you’re fine.

We grew up thinking body image issues were something only women struggled with. But the truth? Men carry that same shame - we just don’t talk about it.In this episode, we open up about body dysmorphia, disordered eating, gym obsession, and the pressure to look “perfect.” From growing up insecure to chasing abs that never felt like enough, we’re laying it all out - not for pity, but to let you know you’re not alone.Reach out to us for questions, comments, or concerns at "[email protected]"

Before we got sober, we thought life was over. No more fun, no more freedom, no more identity. But the truth? Sobriety didn’t kill the vibe - it saved it.In this episode, we talk about what we feared most about getting clean, the unexpected joy we’ve found in recovery, and the tools that help us keep showing up every day. From staring at the ice melt in someone's drink, wondering why the f*ck they haven't taken a sip, to finding real connection, this is our honest take on what life looks like after the chaos stops.Because being sober doesn’t mean you’re boring, it means you’re awake.Reach out to us at "[email protected]"

In this first episode of Built, Not Broken, we introduce ourselves - Max and Matt - and share our stories of addiction, recovery, and what led us to create this podcast.Max is a 22-year-old from Grand Forks, North Dakota, sober from alcoholism and drug abuse for over a year. Matt is a 34-year-old who was released from prison in 2024 after years of battling meth addiction. We come from completely different worlds, and met in the most unexpected way. We connected instantly, and found a friendship rooted in honesty, healing, and showing up as our full selves.This episode is about more than just who we are. It’s about what we’ve been through, how sobriety and vulnerability have transformed our lives, and why we’re committed to talking about the things most men keep buried.We cover:What addiction looked like for both of usThe role shame and denial played in our pastsBody dysmorphia and eating disorders in menMatt’s time in prison and the unexpected lessons it broughtHow a salad bar and a conversation sparked a movementWhy we believe vulnerability is strengthThis podcast isn’t about perfection, and it isn’t polished. It’s real. We’re not therapists or going to pretend we’ve got it all figured out. We’re here to heal out loud, and to give other people tools to do the same.Because you’re not broken. You’re just being built.