Where to Find Bread with Teri Murrison

Some stories don’t begin on the day of the crisis - they begin years earlier, in the quiet choices that shape who we are before we’re tested. That’s the premise Vincent Van den Broek returns to throughout our conversation about his brain trauma recovery on Where to Find Bread.In October 2024, Vincent was struck by a car while riding an e-scooter. He was given a 10% chance of survival, spent three weeks in a coma, underwent multiple neurosurgeries, and had part of his skull removed and stored in his abdomen - a standard procedure, he explains, used to relieve pressure and protect the brain from oxygen loss. His family began preparing for the possibility that he might never wake up. He did. And what followed, he says, wasn’t a transformation into someone new, but confirmation of who he already was.That distinction sits at the heart of this episode. Vincent rejects the popular idea that catastrophe rebuilds a person from scratch. Instead, he describes the accident as a test of the values he’d already spent years developing - authenticity, honesty, and genuine human connection. “Resilience,” he says, “is a muscle that you can train just like any other muscle in your body.” He compares it to lifting weights: you don’t start with the heaviest load, you build gradually, over months, by choosing to face hardship instead of avoiding it.The conversation moves through Vincent’s founding of Until It’s Done, a well-being community built on the idea that dreams and goals are achieved through the deliberate alignment of health, lifestyle, mindset, structure, and action - not luck. He traces this philosophy back to his own life: a structured, closely managed childhood under a mother he describes as “the law,” a first job in hospitality he wasn’t originally allowed to pursue, and a career built almost entirely on his love of people and connection.Vincent shares his physical scars on camera and walks through what happened to his skull and brain during the accident and subsequent surgeries - offered plainly, from personal experience, not as medical advice. From there, the conversation moves naturally into a discussion of neuroplasticity, which Vincent describes in accessible terms as the brain’s ability to “build new roads” after damage. He also touches on concepts like cognitive reserve and myelin, drawing on his own research and conversations with his medical team, while being clear that he is not a medical professional and cannot speak to how these processes work for anyone else’s recovery.Many who’ve experienced betrayal trauma will take away nuggets from Vincent’s experience. Vincent leaves us with an open invitation to reach out to him directly and a reminder that, wherever you are, “when you’re at your lowest, the only way is up.True that. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

When someone you love has been betrayed, knowing what to say — and what NOT to say — can make all the difference. In this short video, Teri shares the exact words that actually help someone healing from betrayal trauma. Not the clichés. Not the quick fixes. The things that make someone feel seen, safe, and supported when their world has fallen apart. This is for the betrayed and our friends, family members, and loved ones who want to show up well — but don't always know how.🕯️ What You'll LearnWhy most people say the wrong thing (and why it matters) The difference between empathy and sympathy And 10 specific phrases that actually help. These are things Teri wishes she had heard when going through her own betrayal trauma. So share this with whomever needs to hear it and then let them do whatever makes YOU most comfortable. Let’s dive in. 📖 Mentioned in this video: The "person in the hole" analogy for understanding empathy vs. sympathy Chapters: 00:00 — Intro: Why words matter after betrayal 03:50 — What most people get wrong 05:27 — 10 specific phrases that actually help 07:38 — Empathy vs. sympathy: the “person in the hole” 07:55 — What they do not need 08:19 — Your turn: share your phrase💬 She'd love to hear from you: What's one thing someone said to you during a hard season that actually helped? Or what do you wish someone had said? Drop it in the comments — your words might be exactly what someone else needs to hear. 🔔 Subscribe to Teri’s YouTube Chanel for more honest conversations about healing, faith, and finding your footing after betrayal at: [https://youtube.com/wheretofindbread.us] and to Fresh Bread the Newsletter at [https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com] “As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.” 🔔 Read Michele Mays' excellent book, "The Betrayal Bind: How to Heal When the Person You Love the Most Hurts You the Worst" [https://amzn.to/4nYTbOJ]. #betrayaltrauma #healingafterbetrayal #supportsomeone #empathy #relationshiphealing #betrayalrecovery #whattosay This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

In our previous episode with host Teri Murrison, we took over the "Internal Board Room," and the response was incredible. So many of you found power in the metaphor of giving your protective parts a voice at the table. But what happens when not only are you traumatized and an unhelpful part takes over, what happens when you're stuck with a painful label too? What if you begin to identify as "Victim," and if never crying, never telling anyone means you never get the help you need? In this episode of Where to Find Bread™, Teri shares a deeply personal story about how one word, "Victim", shaped her identity for years and how Internal Family Systems (IFS) helped her lay that label down. As she reflects on trauma, betrayal, healing, and self-understanding, she talks about meeting a protective part of herself she calls Cry Baby, and how that discovery opened the door to deeper healing. This episode is about more than recovery. It is about moving beyond survival and even beyond healing into thriving. She explores the power of words to define us, limit us, or set us free, and shares the new labels she's choosing for herself now: beneficiary, rescuer, victor, thriver, and hero. If you have ever felt trapped by the names pain, trauma, betrayal, or other people’s actions placed on you, this episode will encourage you to get curious, tell the truth, and choose words that align with who you are becoming. In This Episode, Teri shares: • A follow-up to her "Internal Boardroom", the story of the "Cry Baby" protector part, Teri's "Victim" label, and how keeping silent kept Teri stuck. • How the label became a negative architect of her identity and attracted further mistreatment. • A brief look at Internal Family Systems (IFS) and how it helps us reconcile our wounded inner parts. • Real-life examples of how predators and others sense the "Victim" label. • Her transition from just "healing" to actually "thriving." • The five new labels she claimed to redefine her life and how you can name and claim your own. Key Takeaways for Your Internal Boardroom • Words have power. They are the Architects of our identity. If we use the labels of the ashbin, we stay in the ashbin. • Thank Your Protectors: Your protective parts were formed to keep you safe when you had no other options. Thank them, then lead them. • Move Beyond Healing: You don't have to stay in a state of "recovery" forever. You can choose to be a Beneficiary of your wisdom and a Hero over your adversity. • Rename to Reclaim: Identifying the negative labels you carry is the first step to replacing them with a new identity. • What's Next? The Bridge to Better Relationships: This work of redefining your identity is the foundation for everything that comes next, especially building healthy relationships. Keeping quiet about trauma - isolating - only guarantees you continue to be a "Victim". Stepping out - being courageous and trusting someone to come alongside - allows you to open a door to healing and opportunity, to being a "Hero". To a place where you can engage with others in strength and wholeness. This is the crucial internal work to do before building external connections. • Finally, Teri encourages consulting a qualified therapist to assist in the process. Learning about deeply held and repressed memories can be re-traumatizing. Teri's not a counselor and recommends you seek professional assistance to take on family of origin work and to begin working with your parts. She has links to resources on wheretofindbread.us. Use them. Listen, Connect & Learn More • Catch Up on Part 1: Taking Over Your Internal Boardroom • Learn about IFS: Internal Family Systems Institute [ifs-institute.com] • Fresh Bread Coloring Book & Journal (Letter H for Healing) [https://wheretofindbread.us/product/26-days-of-fresh-bread-coloring-book-journal/]• Subscribe to our YouTube Channel @wheretofindbread and our newsletter at wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com• Visit our website [wheretofindbread.us] for more information and resources. • Join the Community: Leave a comment below with the new name you're claiming for one of your parts! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

If you want to fly, you have to give up what weighs you down. But what happens when the weight you're carrying isn't just "bad" memories, but a "good" yearning for the past? In this episode of "Where to Find Bread," Teri Murrison dives into the first letter of her new E-Book and Journal, 26 Days of Fresh Bread. Teri shares a raw, honest look at her self-discovery while journaling the letter A for Accept prompt. Using the metaphor of "chucking boulders," she explores how carrying the weight of past betrayals, "what ifs," and even nostalgic longings can pin us to the ground when we were meant to soar. If you feel stuck in survival mode, learn why acceptance isn't about liking what happened - it's about acknowledging where you stand so you can finally move forward toward wholeness and peace. Hosted by Teri Murrison, "Where to Find Bread" is a space for hard but honest conversations about transitioning from trauma to a life of thriving. Through metaphors of bread-making and creative expression, we find the ingredients needed for a life started anew. [Timestamps] 0:00 - Intro: 26 Days of Fresh Bread Coloring Book & Journal 0:36 - A is for Accept: Moving from survival to wholeness 1:19 - The power of coloring and journaling for stress reduction 2:15 - Defining Acceptance: Acknowledging where you stand right now 2:46 - Journaling Prompt: What boulders are you carrying today? 3:42 - Realizing which boulders have been dislodged 4:23 - Day Two: When "Yearning" becomes a boulder 6:19 - Why we must let go of the things we treasure to move forward 7:40 - A sneak peek at the letter B: B is for Bridge 8:18 - How to get your copy of the 26 Days of Fresh Bread E-Book 🍞 Get the Free 4-Letter Sample (H is for Healing): [https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com/pkhn05c6fw] 📖 Purchase the Full 60-Page E-Book (26 Days of Fresh Bread): [https://wheretofindbread.us/product/26-days-of-fresh-bread-coloring-book-journal/] 📩 Subscribe to the Newsletter for more bread for hungry souls: [https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com/] Subscribe to the Channel: [youtube.com/wheretofindbread] Website: [www.wheretofindbread.us] #WhereToFindBread #TraumaHealing #Acceptance #MentalHealth #Journaling #TeriMurrison #EmotionalWellness #PersonalGrowth This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

I spent years feeling like different parts of me were fighting for control — until I discovered Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy. It changed everything. In this video, I walk you through how IFS and EMDR therapy helped me identify the "protective" and "wounded" parts of my personality that were originally created by family of origin trauma and made exponentially worse by partner betrayal trauma — and how I finally started healing from the inside out. You'll hear about the Eight C's of Self (confidence, calmness, creativity, clarity, courage, curiosity, compassion, connectedness) and how I used them to stop my past trauma from running my present life. This isn't clinical advice. This is one hungry beggar telling you where she found bread.⏱ CHAPTERS: 00:00 – Introduction: Who's really in charge? 00:20 – The Boardroom Metaphor 02:51 – What is Internal Family Systems (IFS)? 04:17 – The Eight C's of Self 05:35 – How EMDR Unlocked My Traumatic Memories 10:54 – The Moment Everything Shifted 14:05 – Free Resource: 26 Days of Fresh Bread *Resources & Links:* - My Thriving Resources Page: http://wheretofindbread.us/thriving-resources - Internal Family Systems (IFS) Institute: https://ifs-institute.com/ - "No Bad Parts" by Richard Schwartz: http://wheretofindbread.us/resources/If this resonated with you, share it with someone who's still carrying the weight of any type of trauma, but especially betrayal trauma. You're not alone — and healing is possible. *Connect With Me:* - Website: https://wheretofindbread.us - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61586913073629 - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrison/ *Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE, LIKE, and SHARE this video to help others heal!* *🔔 SUBSCRIBE:* https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread #BetrayalTrauma #IFSTherapy #TraumaHealing #InternalFamilySystems #EMDRTherapy This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

You know that dream that keeps coming back? The one where you're running through the hallways of your childhood home, but the walls are closing in and you can't find the door? I had a dream like that for years. Only I never got inside my home. And no one was chasing me. I was outside a closed gate when I yearned to be inside. But my feet were rooted to the ground where I stood. And no one asked me inside. This 4-minute story is the one I've been building toward—the moment everything shifted. It's longer than usual because some breakthroughs can't be rushed. In this reel, I'm sharing the therapy session that changed everything. The one where I finally went deep into family of origin work: those patterns we inherit, the roles we play without choosing them, the invisible scripts we've been reading from since we were kids. Here's what I didn't expect: facing those old wounds wouldn't break me. It would free me. The dream? Gone. The ache? Also gone. If you've been on the fence about doing this kind of work, if you've been scared of what you might find when you look back, I want you to know: the freedom on the other side is real. You don’t forget the dream or the memory, you just become untouched by its sorrow. The emotion gives way. Grab your favorite drink, find a quiet spot, and settle in. This one's worth the four minutes. The breakthrough is the payoff. And you deserve that payoff too. #TherapyJourney #FamilyOfOrigin #BreakthroughMoment #MentalHealthMatters #HealingJourney This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Everyone says "just let it go" — but nobody tells you why that's so much harder than it sounds when the trauma lives in your body, not just your mind. This is the Season 3 premiere of Where to Find Bread, and it's the most vulnerable episode I've made. I finally did the family of origin work I'd been avoiding — and what came out of it shook me. In this episode I share: → Why EMDR therapy (bilateral stimulation) works when talk therapy doesn't → An excerpt from a story I wrote to process recurring childhood dreams → How "The Body Keeps the Score" cracked open what I couldn't say out loud → The moment I realized letting go isn't a decision — it's a process This is my story. But I have a feeling parts of it are yours too. ⏱ CHAPTERS: 00:00 – Season 3 Begins: Why I Finally Got Help 00:30 – The Family of Origin Work I Kept Avoiding 05:50 – What EMDR Actually Feels Like 07:50 – "The Baby, the Prostitute, and Me" (Original Story) 13:55 – Books That Helped Me Heal 15:25 – What's Coming Next (My Book!) 📚 BOOKS MENTIONED: • The Body Keeps the Score – Bessel van der Kolk • The 5 Second Rule – Mel Robbins • The Official We Do Not Care Club Handbook 🍞 GRAB YOUR EBOOK → [https://wheretofindbread.us/product/26-days-of-fresh-bread-coloring-book-journal/] 📩 Join the newsletter → [https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com] *Please leave a comment:* I read every single one and would love to hear how you are moving forward this week! *Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE, LIKE, and SHARE this video to help others heal!* 🔗 Connect With Me:* - Website & Recovery Resources: https://wheretofindbread.us/resources - Join the Newsletter: Stay updated on new episodes and tools for your toolkit: https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com *🔔 SUBSCRIBE:* https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/ #BetrayalTrauma #TraumaHealing #EMDRTherapy #LettingGo #HealingJourney This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Welcome to the 8th episode of "Where to Find Bread" with your host, Teri Murrison. In Episode 8, I am, some of us are, making a massive pivot! After spending a season discussing the heavy reality of betrayal trauma and healing, sexual addiction, and surviving infidelity, it’s time to step out of the "winter" of survival. This journey to wholeness and overcoming trauma is moving forward! That said, I realize that some of you are just starting your journey, so, in the meantime, I’ll continue to add to our Surviving season even as I begin charting the 3rd Thriving season!Whether you are staying, leaving, or still undecided about your relationship, this episode is your invitation to stop focusing on fixing things and start focusing on healing "you." It’s time to stop surviving and start thriving. *✨ What You Will Learn in This Episode:* - The Big Pivot: Why I’m adding the topic of addiction recovery to also focus on personal health, resilience, and wholeness. - Childhood Fragmentation: How early attachment issues and childhood trauma mess with our brains and impact adult relationships. - Rewiring Your Brain: A sneak peek into Season 3, where we will use art, travel, music, and journaling to build a life you truly love. Key Takeaways: A powerful recap of our journey from "Doing It" (Season 1) to "Surviving" (Season 2), and what it means to "Thrive" (Season 3). *🕒 Video Chapters:* 00:00 - Introduction to Season Three: A New Beginning 02:48 - Moving Forward: Healing, Attachment Issues & Wholeness 05:37 - Key Takeaways from Seasons One and Two Don't forget to *SUBSCRIBE, LIKE, and SHARE* this video! Let me know in the comments—are you ready for Season 3? *🔗 Connect With Me & Resources:* - Website & Recovery Resources: https://wheretofindbread.us/services - Join the Newsletter: Stay updated on new episodes and tools for your toolkit: https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61586913073629 - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrison/ *🔔 SUBSCRIBE:* https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/featured?sub_confirmation=1 #BetrayalTrauma #HealingFromBetrayal #SurvivingInfidelity #WholenessJourney #OvercomingTrauma #BetrayalRecovery #ChildhoodTraumaHealing #LifeAfterBetrayal #MovingForward #WhereToFindBread This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Welcome to Season 2, Episode 7 of "Where to Find Bread." I'm your host, Teri Murrison. Today, we're focusing on "best practices" for the critical moments, days, and months after uncovering your partner's betrayal on Discovery Day, or "D-Day." If you have just discovered their sexual betrayal or addiction and feel completely overwhelmed, this episode is the survival guide I wish someone had handed me. I dive deep into the raw, practical steps required to get through those first agonizing hours and then the unending parade of days after "trauma brain" takes over. In this episode, I share my personal list of 12 essential best practices for surviving the initial blows of D-Day and beyond. From managing the urge to react impulsively to conducting what some might consider a "cold-blooded" financial assessment that restores a sense of control, these steps are foundational to finding safety and beginning your betrayal recovery journey. *What You'll Learn in This Video:* - Why pausing to breathe and keeping an accurate record is crucial from Day 1 - Actionable ways to release the anger and trauma stored in your body - How to find the RIGHT trauma-specialized help (via APSATS' online directory) and avoid unhelpful, sometimes harmful, advice - The importance of establishing true physical, emotional, and spiritual safety - Why does conducting a detailed financial audit of your prospects put you in a position of strength - Using your core values to navigate the grieving process and rebuild your identity *Video Chapters:* 0:00:00 - Intro 0:02:00 - The Day My World Was Blown to Bits 0:03:38 - 1. Breathe: Keep Your Powder Dry0:04:22 - 2. The Notepad: Keep an Accurate Record 0:05:29 - 3. Vigorous Exercise: Releasing the Rage 0:06:29 - 4. Find the RIGHT Help (APSATS Trained) 0:07:26 - 5. Define Your Physical & Emotional Safety 0:08:31 - 6. Find a Support Group: Isolation is the Enemy 0:09:14 - 7. Insist Your Partner Gets Into a Recovery Group 0:10:18 - 8. A DIY Financial Audit: Evaluate Your Prospects 0:13:38 - 9. Accept the Change & Grieve Your Loss 0:15:34 - 10. Invest In Yourself (For You, Not for Revenge) 0:17:14 - 11. Journal to Memorialize Your Progress0:18:34 - 12. Decide to Seek a New Reality Or Restore the Old If you found this conversation insightful, please *subscribe, like, and share* this video! Visit Where to Find Bread for more resources and support on your healing journey. *🔗 Connect With Us & Resources:* Find a Trauma-Specialized Therapist: https://www.apsats.org Find a Betrayal & Beyond Support Group: https://www.puredesire.org Website: https://wheretofindbread.us Subscribe to our Newsletter: https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Where-to-Find-Bread/61586913073629 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrison Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/2yqn1sb56l7yt0pz09ormvlrizd1cv/_profile *🔔 SUBSCRIBE:* https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/featured?sub_confirmation=1 #betrayaltrauma #infidelityrecovery #survivinginfidelity #affairrecovery #healingfrombetrayal #dday #apsats This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Today, we continue our powerful conversation with Bridget C, a Clarity Coach who specializes in guiding partners of sex addicts from a place of confusion and unsafety to stability and clarity. If you have just discovered your husband's sexual betrayal and feel completely paralyzed by "trauma brain," this episode is for you. We dive deep into the neurobiological response of betrayal, why your brain feels stuck in fight, flight, or freeze, and how you can actively begin to regulate your nervous system to survive the day. In this raw and practical episode, Bridget provides a step-by-step roadmap to healing. We discuss the critical differences between trauma coaching and clinical counseling, and why establishing true emotional and physical safety is the non-negotiable first step. Bridget also demystifies the highly intimidating "Full Disclosure" process, explaining how to prepare for it, face your worst fears, and use your personal values as a North Star to reclaim your identity. *What You'll Learn in This Video:* - How betrayal triggers a neurobiological trauma response in your brain - The key differences between clinical counseling and clarity coaching - Actionable grounding techniques to regulate your nervous system - How to establish physical and emotional safety after discovering infidelity - Navigating the "Full Disclosure" process and uncovering the whole truth- How to overcome the shame of betrayal and the stigma of divorce - Using your core values to rebuild your identity and find post-traumatic growth *Video Chapters:*0:00:00 - Intro: Healing the Trauma Brain 0:02:41 - Coaching vs. Counseling in Betrayal Trauma Recovery 0:07:02 - Betrayal's Effect on the Brain & Nervous System Regulation 0:10:52 - The First Step: Establishing True Safety & Boundaries 0:14:21 - Overcoming the Shame of Betrayal and Divorce 0:18:20 - The Full Disclosure Process: Why Truth is the Foundation 0:21:05 - Using Your Values as a North Star to Reclaim Your Identity 0:28:51 - How to Manage Your Worst Fears & Anxiety 0:34:05 - Defining Success in Healing & Your Marriage *If you found this conversation insightful, please subscribe, like, and share this video! Visit Where to Find Bread for more resources and support on your healing journey. 🔗 Connect With Us & Resources:* Learn more about it: https://www.empowered-coaching.org/ Website: https://wheretofindbread.us (For recovery resources & counselor referrals) Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Where-to-Find-Bread/61586913073629 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrison Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/2yqn1sb56l7yt0pz09ormvlrizd1cv/_profile *🔔 SUBSCRIBE:* https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/featured?sub_confirmation=1 #betrayaltrauma #infidelity #healingafterbetrayal #betrayaltraumarecovery #sexaddictionrecovery #emotionalabuse #religioustrauma #healingjourney #apsats #wheretofindbread This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

In this episode, Teri sits down with Bridget C, a Clarity Coach for betrayed partners of sex addicts, as she shares her deeply personal and unexpected story of betrayal trauma recovery. If you have ever navigated the devastating, hidden layers of a husband’s secret sexual addiction and double life, this episode will deeply validate your experience.For over a decade, Bridget suffered under the weight of this reality, all while being unfairly labeled by therapists as the “codependent” one. In this raw and honest conversation, Bridget discusses the difficult and painful transition from trying to “save” a toxic marriage to finally choosing to save herself. She opens up about realizing she wasn’t the root of the problem; she was a traumatized partner living in an unsafe, emotionally abusive environment. We also touch on the deep impact of religious trauma and the pressure women often face to stay in unhealthy situations.Ultimately, this is a story of beautiful redemption. Bridget shares how she found the courage to break free, heal from emotional and domestic abuse, and build a life of genuine hope and clarity on the other side.If you found Bridget’s story insightful and encouraging, please subscribe, like, and share this video with someone who might need to hear it today! *🔗 Connect With Us & Resources:*Learn more about it: https://www.empowered-coaching.org/Website: https://wheretofindbread.us (For recovery resources & counselor referrals)Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Where-to-Find-Bread/61586913073629Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrisonPinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/2yqn1sb56l7yt0pz09ormvlrizd1cv/_profile *🔔 SUBSCRIBE:* https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/featured?sub_confirmation=1#betrayaltraumarecovery #sexaddictionrecovery #emotionalabuse #healingjourney #apsats #wheretofindbread This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

When Teri first discovered the truth about her marriage, she didn’t have the words to describe what she was feeling. She only knew her world had exploded. In this episode of Where to Find Bread™, she talks with Jennie Bacon, (MS, LCPC, CCPS, DSTT, CCES) about the specific language of betrayal trauma and intimacy anorexia.Teri sits down with Jennie who brings both professional expertise and profound lived experience to the field of betrayal trauma recovery.If you have ever felt like you were living on top of a hidden world, or if gaslighting has made you feel confused and maybe even “insane,” this conversation will validate your experience. We move past the clinical alphabet soup of certifications to talk about the actual, life-saving tools that help partners and betrayers heal. From the “Personal Iceberg” of the Minwalla Model to the essential safety steps of the APSATS framework, we explore exactly why specialized help is non-negotiable.*What You’ll Learn in This Video:*- Understanding the “Personal Iceberg” model for addiction- Decoding sex addiction and betrayal trauma- Key therapy tools: EMDR, EFT, ABSATS, Minwalla Model- Navigating recovery from discovery to full disclosure- Why betrayal trauma is considered domestic abuse- The importance of professional, specialized help- Pathways to post-traumatic growth and relationship repair *Video Chapters:*0:00:00 - Introduction to the “Iceberg Model” and today’s guest, Jenny Bacon0:01:05 - Jenny’s Journey: From Corporate to Betrayal Trauma Counseling0:04:15 - Understanding EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)0:06:08 - Exploring EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) for Reconnection0:07:35 - Decoding ABSATS (Associated Partners of Sex Addiction Trauma Specialists) & Multi-Dimensional Partner Trauma0:12:00 - The Minwalla Model: Secret Sexual Basements & the Two-Part Problem0:17:15 - Early Recovery Couple’s Empathy Model (ERCEM) for Marital Healing0:21:40 - Narrative Focused Trauma Care & Healing Family of Origin Wounds0:25:30 - Why Qualified Professionals Matter in Betrayal Trauma Recovery0:27:00 - Faith-Based vs. Non-Faith-Based Approaches to Healing0:28:00 - Defining Betrayer and Betrayed: Gender Dynamics0:29:45 - Licensed Counselor vs. Coach: Key Differences0:33:00 - What is Betrayal Trauma? Understanding the Layers of Harm0:35:10 - Betrayal Trauma and Complex PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)0:36:30 - Who Seeks Help First: The Betrayer or the Partner?0:38:00 - Defining Success in the Counseling Relationship0:41:00 - The Surprising Prevalence of Pornography in the Church0:45:00 - God’s Perception on Betrayal Trauma & Traditional Church Counsel0:49:00 - Why the Minwalla Model Defines Betrayal as Domestic Abuse0:50:40 - The Recovery Process: From Discovery to Therapeutic Disclosure0:57:30 - Addressing Grief and Loss in Recovery0:59:15 - Understanding Relapse and Partner Preparation1:01:30 - Advice for the Betrayed Partner: First Steps to Healing1:02:40 - Advice for the Betrayer: Finding Freedom from Addiction1:03:30 - How to Contact Jenny Bacon & Find Qualified ResourcesIf you found this conversation insightful, please *subscribe, like,* and *share* this video! Visit Where to Find Bread™ for more resources and support on your healing journey. *Connect With Us & Resources🔗 Website: https://wheretofindbread.us (For recovery resources & counselor referrals)Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Where-to-Find-Bread/61586913073629Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrisonPinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/2yqn1sb56l7yt0pz09ormvlrizd1cv/_profile *🔔 SUBSCRIBE* : https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/featured?sub_confirmation=1#sexaddictionrecovery #betrayaltrauma #emdrtherapy #efttherapy #complexptsd #domesticabuse #healingjourney #relationshipgoals #mentalhealth #addictionrecovery #traumacare #posttraumaticgrowthKey Takeaways for Listeners:* Trust your nervous system: If you feel “insane” because of conflicting realities, it’s likely a normal response to betrayal trauma.* Specialization matters: Not every counselor is equipped to handle the nuances of sex addiction. Look for specialists trained in betrayal trauma (CSAT, APSATS, or Minwalla Model).* Lies are the landmines: Most marriages don’t end because of the actions themselves, but because of the persistent lying. Truth is the only way forward.* You aren’t alone: Whether you are the partner or the betrayer, there are support groups and resources designed to carry you when you can’t carry yourself.Resources Mentioned:* APSATS (Association of Partners of Sex Addiction Trauma Specialists)* The Minwalla Model (Integrity Abuse Disorder)* The Allender Center (Narrative-focused trauma care)* The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

When someone you love has been betrayed, knowing what to say — and what NOT to say — can make all the difference. This is Teri Murrison with Where to Find Bread and in this short video, I'm sharing the exact words that actually help someone healing from betrayal trauma. Not the clichés. Not the quick fixes. The things that make someone feel seen, safe, and supported when their world has fallen apart. This is for the betrayed and our friends, family members, and loved ones who want to show up well — but don't always know how. What You'll Learn: Why most people say the wrong thing (and why it matters) The difference between empathy and sympathy And 10 specific phrases that actually help. These are things I wish I’d heard when I was going through my betrayal trauma. So share this with whomever needs to hear it and then let them do whatever makes YOU most comfortable. Let’s dive in.What those who love us should avoid saying at all costs 📖 Mentioned in this video: The "person in the hole" analogy for understanding empathy vs. sympathy 💬 I'd love to hear from you: What's one thing someone said to you during a hard season that actually helped? Or what do you wish someone had said? Drop it in the comments — your words might be exactly what someone else needs to hear. 🔔 Go to my YouTube Chanel to watch this video.Subscribe to my YouTube Chanel for more honest conversations about healing, faith, and finding your footing after betrayal at: [   / wheretofindbread.us  ] and to Fresh Bread the Newsletter at [https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com] “As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.” 🔔 Read Michele Mays' excellent book, "The Betrayal Bind: How to Heal When the Person You Love the Most Hurts You the Worst" [https://amzn.to/4nYTbOJ]. Chapters: 00:00 — Intro: Why words matter after betrayal 03:50 — What most people get wrong 05:27 — 10 specific phrases that actually help 07:38 — Empathy vs. sympathy: the "person in the hole" 07:55 — What they do not need 08:19 — Your turn: share your phrases, please!Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

In this episode of Where to Find Bread, I share a deeply personal reflection on trauma, identity, and the labels that can shape our lives for years without us fully realizing it.As I continued my Internal Family Systems work, I came to understand a protective part of myself I call Cry Baby. That experience helped me see how the label victim had quietly influenced the way I saw myself, the way I moved through the world, and the kinds of situations I found myself in.In this episode, I talk about the burden of negative identity labels, the role of trauma and secrecy in shaping emotional patterns, and the freedom that comes when I begin choosing new words on purpose.I am no longer content to stay in survival mode. I am no longer aiming only for healing. I am choosing to thrive.I share the new labels I am embracing now: beneficiary, rescuer, victor, thriver, and hero.If you are navigating betrayal trauma recovery, healing from childhood wounds, or reclaiming your sense of self after painful experiences, I hope this episode offers insight, encouragement, and hope.Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

"If you want to fly, you have to give up what weighs you down." — Roy T. BennettWhen we survive trauma or betrayal, we often carry heavy "boulders" labeled I’ll never trust again, What if, and If only. We think these boulders protect us, but in reality, they just keep us pinned to the ground.In this episode, Teri Murrison explores the first letter of her journal and coloring book, 26 Days of Fresh Bread: A for Accept.Teri shares a deeply personal realization about what it actually means to "chuck a boulder." It isn’t just about letting go of the bad things that happened to us; sometimes, the heaviest weights we carry are the things we treasure—the "yearnings" for a past that no longer exists.Inside this episode, you’ll discover:Why acceptance is the first necessary ingredient in the recipe for healing.The surprising "good" boulders that might be holding you back from your future.How the creative acts of coloring and journaling can calm the mind and release emotional expression.A sneak peek into the next step of the journey: B for Bridge.If you are ready to transition from surviving to thriving, pull up a chair. There is fresh bread for your soul today.Links & Resources:Download the Free 4-Letter Sample (H is for Healing): [ https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com/pkhn05c6fw ]Get the Full 60-Page E-Book & Journal: [ https://wheretofindbread.us/product/26-days-of-fresh-bread-coloring-book-journal/ ]Join the Newsletter: [ https://wheretofindbread.myflodesk.com/ ] for more "bread for hungry souls."Follow Teri on YouTube: [ youtube.com/wheretofindbread ]Teri's Website: [wheretofindbread.us]Share your thoughts: What is one boulder you are carrying today? What would it feel like to set it down for just a moment?Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

 *Leading Your Internal Boardroom: Healing with IFS Therapy & EMDR* Welcome to Season 3, Episode 2 of "Where to Find Bread" with your host, Teri Murrison. Have you ever felt like someone else was pulling the strings in your life Today, I’m getting personal about a struggle I’ve had my entire life: control of the "internal boardroom". In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain and sharing how I took back control using Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy and EMDR. I'll introduce you to the protective "parts" of my personality, from Madam Chair to Chatty Cathy, and even the "exiled" parts I found hiding in the dark hold of my internal ship. Plus, I share a massive epiphany about the "Rusty Gate" that changed my entire outlook on rejection. (As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.) *What You Will Learn in This Episode:* - The Rusty Gate Epiphany: Why rejection is often just protection from a dysfunctional situation. - Internal Family Systems (IFS): A deep dive into Richard Schwartz's model of therapy and how it works. - Meeting My Parts: Understanding Madam Chair, Chatty Cathy, Miss Independence, and more. - The Trap Door: Bringing my exiled, shamed parts back into the light for true healing. - The 8 C's of Self: How to restore your core self to lead with calmness, clarity, and courage. *Resources & Links:* - My Thriving Resources Page: http://wheretofindbread.us/thriving-resources - Internal Family Systems (IFS) Institute: https://ifs-institute.com/ - "No Bad Parts" by Richard Schwartz: http://wheretofindbread.us/resources/ *Video Chapters:* 00:00 - Introduction: Who is Running Your Internal Boardroom? 01:15 - The Rusty Gate Epiphany: Rejection is Protection 02:37 - Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy Explained 04:14 - The 8 C's of Self & Restoring Balance 05:01 - Meeting My Internal Parts (Madam Chair, Chatty Cathy) 09:50 - The Trap Door: Healing My Exiled Parts 11:41 - Testing My New Self-Leadership 13:59 *Please leave a comment:* I read every single one! Let me know who is sitting at your internal board table. *Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE, LIKE, and SHARE this video to help others heal!* *Connect With Me:* - Website: https://wheretofindbread.us - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61586913073629 - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrison/ *🔔 SUBSCRIBE:* https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/featured?sub_confirmation=1 #IFS #InternalFamilySystems #EMDRTherapy #TraumaHealing #SelfLeadership #WhereToFindBread #TeriMurrison #TherapyJourney #OvercomingTrauma #mentalwellness Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

Episode SummaryWelcome to Season 3. We are leaving "surviving" behind and moving into "thriving." In this kickoff episode, I’m getting vulnerable about a question I’ve asked myself for a long time: what was wrong with me? I’m sharing my recent return to therapy, not to talk about betrayal, but to do the deep work on my family of origin. I discuss my experience with bilateral stimulation (EMDR), how trauma gets stuck in the body, and why I’m finally ready to open the "rusty gate" to my past so I can fly unencumbered into my future.Show Notes Stop Surviving. Start Thriving.I actually had a different episode recorded for today, but I trashed it. After a life-changing hour in therapy this week, I knew I had to tell you the truth about where I am and where we are going.In the premiere of Season 3, I’m shifting the focus entirely to personal health and wholeness. I’m sharing the "who, what, where, and why" of family of origin work and why I was finally brave enough to wade into those waters. If you’ve ever felt "fragmented" or stuck in old patterns of behavior, this episode is for you.In this episode, I cover:The Decision to Start Again: Why I’m focusing on my own healing independent of my husband’s recovery.Family of Origin 101: What it is and how our early roles and traumas influence our relationships today.The Science of Healing: My experience with "paddles" (bilateral stimulation) and how it helped me process a recurring, painful dream about my childhood home.The Baby, The Prostitute, and Me: A reading of a portion of my personal story about the "rusty gate" and finding safety within myself.Big News: The reveal of my upcoming project, the 26 Days of Fresh Bread Coloring Book & Journal.Resources Mentioned in this Episode:The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk (and the accompanying workbook).The Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins.The Official We Do Not Care Club Handbook (for a much-needed laugh).New Thriving Resources: Check them out at wheretofindbread.us/thriving-resourcesConnect with me:Subscribe: Don’t miss a single step of this "Thriving" season.Website: Find the new resources and my blog at wheretofindbread.usSocial Media: Follow for updates on the new coloring book and journal!#Family of origin work #healing childhood trauma #EMDR for betrayal trauma #thriving after betrayal #Teri Murrison #Where to Find Bread #somatic memory healing #The Body Keeps the Score #Mel Robbins # The Let Them Theory # Personal wholeness  #26 Days of Fresh Bread Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

Stop Surviving. Start Thriving.It's time. Who's with me?! Tell me in the comments, please!In this season finale, I’m making a clean break. For the past year, we’ve looked at the "who, what, where, and when" of surviving a partner’s sexual addiction and intimacy anorexia. But today, I’m stepping out of that winter and into a new season focused on personal resilience and joy.I share a bit of my own history with early childhood fragmentation and how it shaped my world. We discuss why betrayal isn't your fault, but why your healing is your responsibility. This isn't about taking the blame for a partner’s choices: it’s about reclaiming the life you deserve.In this episode, I cover:The Big Pivot: Why I’m leaving the topic of addiction in more capable hands to focus on personal wholeness.Fragmentation vs. Wholeness: A look at how early attachment issues mess with our brains and how we can rewire them.The Roadmap for Season 3: Using art, travel, music, and journalling to build a life you love.Key Takeaways: A recap of our journey from "Doing It" (Season 1) to "Surviving" (Season 2) and what it looks like to "Thrive" (Season 3).Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction to Season Three: A New Beginning 02:48 Moving Forward: Healing and Wholeness 05:37 Key Takeaways from Seasons One and TwoConnect with me:Visit the Website: Find the Survival Guide for D-Day and other recovery resourcesFollow on Social Media: Facebook, InstagramJoin the Newsletter: Stay updated on new episodes and tools for your toolkit.  Don’t miss the transition to Season 3.  SubscribePlease share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

If you’ve just had the "Discovery Day" (D-Day) talk - that moment where the person you love tells you they’ve been living a double life - you are likely reeling, numb, or quivering with rage. I’ve been exactly where you are. In this episode, I’m sharing the list of things I wish someone had handed me the day my world was blown to bits. From why you need a notepad and a snow shovel to a "cold-blooded" informal financial audit that actually gives you peace of mind, these are the 12 best practices that helped me regain my footing. You won't be the same person a year from now, but I promise you, it can be better.When the "Professor" walked down the stairs and told me he was a sex addict, I had no roadmap. I didn't know about "best practices" for trauma; I just knew I was falling. Today, I’m looping back to that moment to help those of you who are just starting this journey."D-Day" Best Practices:Breathe: Don't react or throw things. Keep your powder dry; you'll need that energy for the long haul.The Notepad: Write everything down immediately. Trauma makes your memory unreliable, and you'll want an accurate record of what was actually said.Vigorous Exercise: I hate to exercise, but shoveling snow protected me from uncontrollable rage. Find a way to release your physical energy.Find the Right Help: Do not just call any counselor. Go to APSATS.org to find someone trained in partner trauma. Don't be blamed for their choices by a well-meaning (or otherwise) therapist.Define Your Safety: Physical, emotional, and spiritual. If they need to sleep in another room or move out, insist on it.Find a Group: Check out PureDesire.org for a Betrayal and Beyond group. Isolation is the enemy of healing.Partner Groups: Request they get into a group like Seven Pillars right away.An Informal Financial Assessment: It sounds cold, but you need to know where you stand financially AND if you can make it on your own. Knowing the numbers gives you a position of strength from which to negotiate.Accept the Change: You will never be the same person you were before this day. Grieve that loss, but don't rush the stages of grief.Invest in Yourself: Pedicures, haircuts, or seek new interests. Do it for you, not to prove a point.Journal: Write it down so that a year from now, you can see how far you've come.New Reality over Restoration: Sometimes there is nothing in the "old" marriage worth restoring. It's okay to want a completely new reality instead.Links Mentioned:APSATS.org (To find trauma-specialized coaches and therapists)PureDesire.org (For local and online support groups)Our Website: https://wheretofindbread.usPlease share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

I’m so glad to have Bridget Gregor back with me for Part 2 of our conversation. While our last episode focused on her personal story, today we’re getting into the "how" of healing. Show Notes In this episode, I sit down with clarity coach Bridget Gregor to map out the journey from the initial shock of discovery to the solid ground of a reclaimed life. If you’ve ever felt like you were losing your mind after uncovering a partner's secret life, this conversation will give you the validation and the tools you need to breathe again.What we cover in this episode:Coaching vs. Counseling: Why a "Clarity Coach" might be the forward-thinking partner you need to move from point A to point B.The 3 Stages of Healing: A look at the APSATS model—Safety and Stabilization, Remembering and Grieving, and finally, Reconnecting.Your Brain on Trauma: Understanding the "window of tolerance" and why you sometimes feel numb or hyper-anxious.The Necessity of Truth: Why "trickle truth" destroys trust and how a formal full disclosure process can help you reclaim your power through informed consent.Grounding Techniques: Practical ways to calm your nervous system when the triggers feel overwhelming.Redefining Success: Why healing is about your wholeness, regardless of whether your marriage is restored or ends in divorce.Resources Mentioned:APSATS Model of Healing: https://apsats.orgFull Disclosure Workbook by Dan Drake and Janice Caudel  Visit Where to Find Bread for more resources Connect with us:Subscribe to my newsletter for encouragement and tools.Watch the podcast and join the conversation in the comments to connect with others who truly understand.Follow on social media for insights on resilience and healing.Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

 Bridget Gregor, a clarity coach for partners of sex addicts, shares her story of betrayal trauma recovery. For over a decade, she navigated the devastating layers of her husband’s secret sexual addiction and double life, all while being told she was the "codependent" one. ➡️ In this episode of "Where to Find Bread," Bridget shares the raw truth about realizing she wasn't the problem—she was a traumatized partner in an unsafe marriage. We discuss the difficult transition from trying to "save" the relationship to finally saving herself, and the beautiful redemption she found on the other side. This is a must-listen for anyone healing from emotional abuse or religious trauma. Timestamps: 00:00 - Introduction to Bridget Gregor's Story 08:00 - The "Secret Sexual Basement": Uncovering the Double Life 14:36 - Are You a "Codependent" or a Traumatized Partner? 23:00 - Healing from Emotional and Domestic Abuse in Marriage 32:14 - Finding Redemption and Life After Betrayal Learn more about Bridget Gregor at https://www.empowered-coaching.org/ #betrayaltraumarecovery #sexaddictionrecovery #bridgetgregor #emotionalabuse #religioustrauma #healingjourney #apsats #wheretofindbread Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

Episode Description: I’m discussing betrayal trauma and intimacy anorexia with Jennie Bacon, a licensed professional counselor who specializes in helping couples navigate the "secret sexual basement" of addiction. If you’ve experienced the trauma of discovery, you know that the lies often hurt more than the actions. Jennie and I dive into the Minwalla Model, the importance of APSATS training, and why specialized help is necessary for real healing.In this conversation, we cover:The Personal Iceberg: Why the behavior you see is only the tip of a much deeper problem involving integrity abuse.Betrayal as Domestic Abuse: A look at the psychological impact of gaslighting and manipulation on a partner’s nervous system.Specialized Recovery Tools: Why general marriage counseling often fails and how tools like EMDR and EFT help move trauma out of the body.The Roadmap to Truth: Understanding the difference between a "trickle-drip" of lies and a formal therapeutic disclosure.Faith and Safety: A candid talk about the tension between church tradition and the actual safety of the individual.Resources for your journey:Find a specialist through APSATS: https://apsats.orgLearn about the Minwalla Model: https://minwallamodel.com/Visit my Services and Resources page: https://wheretofindbread.us/servicesPlease share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

Episode SummaryIn this episode, I’m joined by a very special guest: my husband, Rich (often referred to as "The Professor"). For years, we lived through a "slow-motion train wreck," and while I’ve shared my perspective, it’s time to hear his. Rich opens up about the roots of his struggles, from a crushing childhood divorce to the "dragon" of sex addiction and intimacy anorexia that nearly destroyed our 44-year marriage. We dive deep into what betrayal looks like when it isn't a physical affair, the physical toll secrets take on the body, and the specific steps we took to choose recovery over divorce. This is a raw, unfiltered look at the work required to find hope in the ruins.Show Notes:Welcome back to Where to Find Bread. This is the episode many of you have been waiting for. Today, my husband Rich joins me to share the side of the story you haven't heard. We’re going beyond the surface to discuss the reality of recovery, the impact of secret addictions, and why "truth-telling" is the only way to save a soul.In this episode, we discuss:·         The Roots of the "Dragon": Rich shares how childhood trauma and a lack of supervision led to an early introduction to pornography and a pattern of emotional withdrawal.·         The Military Years: A look at how past heartbreak in Italy fueled a cycle of "acting out" and a vow to never be vulnerable again.·         Defining Intimacy Anorexia: We explain this often-misunderstood term and how withholding emotional, spiritual, and physical connection is a form of betrayal.·         Discovery Day: The moment the secret surfaced on his Facebook feed and the terror of finally being seen.·         The Physical Toll of Secrets: How Rich’s health declined as the addiction progressed, and the "shrunken" version of himself he became while riding the dragon.·         The Path to Recovery: Why specific training in the field of sex addiction and intimacy anorexia is non-negotiable for healing and how neuroplasticity offers hope for a re-wired brain and recovery.Key Takeaways:1.  Betrayal is more than physical: Intimacy anorexia, the active withholding of oneself, can be just as damaging as an affair and is actually a form of domestic abuse.2.  Addiction is progressive: It gets worse. It doesn't just stay in the mind; it eventually manifests in physical illness and emotional isolation too.3.  Healing requires a specific tribe: General counseling often falls short. Recovery requires experts trained in the nuances of sex addiction and partner trauma.4.  It’s never too late: Even after 40+ years of dysfunction, a commitment to change and radical honesty can build a new foundation.Connect with Teri:·         Visit the Website  Check out our Services and Resources page for recommended books and counselors.·         Subscribe to the Newsletter·         Follow on Social Media: Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Pinterest·         Join the Conversation: Watch on YoPlease share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

Join me for honest conversations on betrayal trauma recovery and learn where to find hope after your life falls apart. Why 'Where to Find Bread'? Because when you’re starving for hope and truth after betrayal, nothing else matters except finding what sustains you. Episode 2 - my side of our 44-year long slow train wreck of a marriage is live now. If you haven't had a chance to watch yet, it's honest, it's hard, but it's hopeful. I was an elected official, a leader, a 'superstar' at work. And I was coming home to a house where I felt completely invisible. My story of survival, in Episode 2. Then, this Thursday, my husband Rich joins me to share his perspective and he lays it all on the table. He makes no excuses and asks for no mercy, but Episode 3, Intimacy Anorexia Destroyed Our Marriage - Until This Happened, may just give you cause for pause. The full story of his journey through addiction and their path to recovery, shows that radical honesty can create true marital healing, even after the deepest betrayals. This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking to understand the hidden dynamics of addiction and trauma in a relationship. Please like, subscribe, follow, and share. There are many, like us, out there without hope, who need to know where to find bread! Is recovery from sex addiction and intimacy anorexia possible? Each person has to decide. It was for us. It may be for you and your partner too. Please seek counsel from a qualified professional: a counselor or life coach trained in helping partners of the sexually addicted recover. There’s a list at www.APSATS.org. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

In this deeply personal and honest episode, Teri dives into the painful reality of living in a 44-year marriage that felt like a "slow-motion train wreck." She discusses surviving betrayal trauma, navigating the invisible walls of intimacy anorexia, and the emotional devastation of Discovery Day. If you have ever felt isolated in your own home or believed the lie that the betrayal was your fault, this episode is for you. Teri’s story about learning of her husband’s intimacy issues is not filled with professional mumbo jumbo. It’s real and raw - just one hungry beggar telling another where she found hope and nourishment - bread. You don't have to walk this road alone. 📌 In this video, you will learn:* - How early attachment wounds and adoption trauma shape adult relationships. - Recognizing the silent signs of intimacy anorexia and emotional neglect. - What "Discovery Day" really means and how to survive the aftermath. - Why betrayal is never the fault of the betrayed partner. - Practical steps for finding meaning, healing, and freedom after years of silence. ⏱️Video Chapters:* 00:00 - Introduction: The Pain of Emotional Neglect 03:40 - Why This Episode Matters 05:43 - Early Attachment Wounds and Adult Relationships 07:14 - Spiritual Bargaining and the Search for Belonging 11:53 - Marriage Without Emotional Safety 14:06 - Loneliness Inside Commitment 16:37 - Work, Achievement, and External Validation 20:10 - Discovery Day Explained 21:03 - Intimacy Anorexia, and Emotional Absence 22:48 - Making Meaning After Betrayal & Looking Ahead 🔔 Subscribe & Hit the Bell Icon!* If this episode resonates with you, please *SUBSCRIBE* to the channel and hit the *BELL ICON (🔔)* so you never miss an upcoming episode. Share this video with someone who feels alone but doesn’t yet have the language for it. *🔗 Connect With Us & Resources:* Website: https://wheretofindbread.us (For recovery resources & counselor referrals) Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Where-to-Find-Bread/61586913073629 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teri_murrison Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/2yqn1sb56l7yt0pz09ormvlrizd1cv/_profile Subscribe to the newsletter for deeper reflections on healing, faith, and living well! *🔔 SUBSCRIBE* : https://www.youtube.com/@WheretoFindBread/featured?sub_confirmation=1 #HealingJourney #EmotionalAbuse #MarriageAdvice #InfidelityRecovery #RelationshipTrauma #MentalHealthMatters #relationshiphealing #traumarecovery #emotionalabuse #personalgrowth #healingjourney #attachmenttheory #selfworth #findinghope This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Content Note: This episode discusses sensitive topics related to marriage, emotional neglect, and betrayal. Listener discretion is advised. I was an elected official, a leader, and a "superstar" at work. At home, I was a ghost. This is the story of how I found bread in the wilderness of my own marriage. For nearly a year, I went quiet. Not because I ran out of things to say, but because I was living through a story I didn’t yet have words for. In this week’s episode of Where to Find Bread, I take you back to the beginning, to the attachment wounds of my adoption and the 'deals' I made with God at 23. I share the reality of 44 years spent in a marriage that felt like a slow-motion train wreck. For decades, I believed the lie that I was the problem. I was told I was 'too much' or 'not enough,' while I navigated the invisible wall of Intimacy Anorexia. I became a superstar in my career just to feel seen, while my life at home felt like a series of closed doors. Then came Discovery Day. Discovery Day is when the secrets come out, and the slow-motion train wreck finally hits the wall. It’s devastating, but it’s also the first day of the rest of your life. If you have ever felt isolated in your own home, or if you’ve been treated as if your worth is tied to your weight or your performance, this episode is for you. I am one hungry beggar telling another where I found bread. And I promise you: It is not your fault. If this episode resonates with you: • Subscribe so you don’t miss Episode 3 • Share this episode with someone who feels alone but doesn’t yet have language for it • Visit the website (https://wheretofindbread.us) for recovery resources and counselor referrals • Subscribe to the newsletter for deeper reflections on healing, faith, and living well • Connect with the community, you don’t have to carry this alone  Chapter Markers 03:40 – Why This Episode Matters05:43 – Early Attachment Wounds and Adult Relationships 07:14 – Spiritual Bargaining and the Search for Belonging 11:53 – Marriage Without Emotional Safety 14:06 – Loneliness Inside Commitment 16:37 – Work, Achievement, and External Validation 20:10 – Discovery Day Explained 21:03 – Intimacy Anorexia and Emotional Absence 22:48 – Making Meaning After Betrayal and Looking Ahead to Episode 3 Episode 3 Teaser In the next episode, out next week, the conversation widens.Teri is joined by her husband, whom she calls the Professor, to share what those same decades felt like from the other side. His story is not offered as defense or justification, but as context. Understanding both perspectives is essential for real recovery, compassion, and meaning-making. Episode 3 is a necessary continuation of the journey.Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

I was an elected official, a leader, and a "superstar" at work. At home, I was a ghost. This is the story of how I found bread in the wilderness of my own marriage.For nearly a year, I went quiet. Not because I ran out of things to say, but because I was living through a story I didn’t yet have words for.In this Friday’s episode of Where to Find Bread, I take you back to the beginning—to the attachment wounds of my adoption and the 'deals' I made with God at 23. I share the reality of 44 years spent in a marriage that felt like a slow-motion train wreck.For decades, I believed the lie that I was the problem. I was told I was 'too much' or 'not enough,' while I navigated the invisible wall of Intimacy Anorexia. I became a superstar in my career just to feel seen, while my life at home felt like a series of closed doors.Then came Discovery Day.Discovery Day is when the secrets come out, and the slow-motion train wreck finally hits the wall. It’s devastating, but it’s also the first day of the rest of your life.If you have ever felt isolated in your own home, or if you’ve been treated as if your worth is tied to your weight or your performance—this episode is for you. I am one hungry beggar telling another where I found bread. And I promise you: It is not your fault.Don't miss my story on Friday. Subscribe.Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

Where to Find Bread is a podcast about living well, even when life hasn’t gone according to plan.Hosted by Teri Murrison, this show explores personal growth, emotional resilience, and relationship healing through honest conversations and real-life experience. Season One invited listeners to create an “It’s Not Too Late” list—a bold reimagining of what’s still possible in midlife and beyond.Season Two focuses on relationships and recovery, with a particular emphasis on betrayal trauma, sex addiction recovery, and intimacy anorexia. Through interviews with men and women living through betrayal, along with doctors, counselors, and other experts, Where to Find Bread offers insight, validation, and practical tools for healing after betrayal.This podcast is for women—and the partners who love them—who want more than survival. It’s for those seeking women’s empowerment, clarity, and hope, and who believe that honest conversation can change lives.If you’re navigating heartbreak, reinvention, or the quiet question of “Is this really it?”—you’re in the right place. Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

When plans fail, you can still choose your values, peace, and your next step. Season 2 of Where to Find Bread, a living well and personal growth podcast, begins with  powerful truth: It’s not too late for hope and healing—even when life falls apart. In this deeply personal episode, host Teri Murrison shares how she endured betrayal trauma and forgot (but then remembered) that all is not as it seems on the surface. She shares how she shifted from doing to being after discovering her husband’s sex addiction and intimacy anorexia and how she recovered from their dysfunctional 43-year marriage. She talks about overcoming and empowerment via a return to faith, peace, boundaries, and purpose. And eventually, experienced restoration of peace and their marriage relationship. She introduces her Let Me List - a framework for restoring emotional resilience even when control was gone, trust was broken, and joy distant. ✉️ Subscribe to her newsletter at https//:wheretofindbread.us for deeper reflections and resources 🌐 Visit the website at https//:wheretofindbread.us to check out resources, read the blog, and explore past episodes 🎧 Follow and listen wherever you get your podcasts 💬 Connect with others who want real tools for real life, and DM Teri if you have questions or need resources Because we need each other—and someday is not guaranteed. And because, Teri still believes, carpe diem is not reckless. It's wise. ⏱️ Timestamps 00:00 INTRO - Prepare for a very rough ride and an admonition 02:24 Welcome to Season 2 04:30 “It’s Not Too Late” and the urgency of time 05:05 Stories of guests who seized the day 07:45 When life suddenly gets smaller 08:00 “All is not as it seems” – faith in turbulence 10:12 Betrayal, gaslighting, and survival 11:00 From the “It’s Not Too Late” list to the “Let Me List” 11:32 Letting go of control 11:57 Living by values and boundaries 14:18 Choosing joy and restoring partnership 15:02 Why Where to Find Bread exists 16:03 Season 2 vision & invitation If you’ve ever wondered whether healing, hope, or change is still possible, this conversation is for you.Please share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

In this episode of Fresh Bread, the video newsletter, Teri Murrison reflects on personal and societal challenges, drawing parallels between personal and historical events and contemporary issues. She discusses her journey of growth and forgiveness framed by her story about the impact of budget cuts in Idaho, the lessons from the Exodus story, and more. Teri encourages listeners to shift their perspectives from complaints to appreciation, emphasizing the importance of forgiveness and understanding in navigating life's difficulties. Takeaways • Honesty meets hope in every situation. • Budget cuts lead to service cuts, impacting communities. • Historical lessons can guide our current challenges. • Complaining can distract from personal growth. • Forgiveness is essential for moving forward. • Life's challenges can be seen as periods of growth. • Appreciation can change our perspective on hardships. • Reflecting on the past can provide clarity for the future. • We often overlook the bigger picture in our struggles. • It's important to consider what we can learn from our experiences. Chapters00:00 Introduction to Fresh Bread and Aha Moments 00:57 Reflections on Budget Cuts and State Services 02:36 Lessons from the Exodus: Complaints and Forgiveness 04:45 Personal Journey: Wandering in the Desert of Life 06:02 Looking at the Bigger Picture: Gratitude and Forgiveness This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Episode DescriptionAfter a year-long hiatus, host Teri Murrison returns with a new season—and a new podcast name. In this sneak peek episode of Where to Find Bread, Teri shares why Teri’s Doing It! ended, what happened during a devastating marriage marked by marital betrayal and sexual addiction, and how recovery, therapy, and hard-earned tools helped her and her husband begin again.Season 2 will explore marriage, pornography addiction, intimacy anorexia, betrayal trauma, attachment, neuroplasticity, grief, recovery, and healing—with counselors, doctors, people in recovery, and betrayed partners. This season isn’t about fixing everything. It’s about finding hope - bread - when you’re starving for it.Season 2 launches in February.Episode Keywords marriage recovery, betrayal trauma, sexual addiction, pornography addiction, intimacy anorexia, marriage podcast, healing after betrayal, marriage, Christian marriage, recovery podcast, trauma and healing, neuroplasticity, relationshipsEpisode Takeaways Why the podcast took a year-long pauseHow betrayal and addiction impact marriage and identityWhat recovery actually looks like—not just sounds likeWhy these conversations matter inside and outside the churchWhat to expect in Season 2 of Where to Find BreadCall to Action Subscribe to Where to Find Bread so you don’t miss the Season 2 launch.Sign up for the newsletter on Substack: @wheretofindbread🎧 The Sneak Peek episode is live now, and Season 2 officially launches in February. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

I’d been curious for years. If I invested in laser resurfacing for my sundamaged, rosaceated face, would it be worth it? The HALO and BBL treatments aren’t cheap or from what I’d heard, painless. But some people swear by them.Like most teenagers, I took absolutely no care of my skin when I should have. Sun damage led to wrinkles, keratoses, and more than several skin cancers beginning in my forties. Fortunately, so far none have been malignant. But I figure that’s a matter of time.So, when I heard that laser resurfacing beauty treatments to reduce facial wrinkling can also help lessen the likelihood of skin cancer, it seemed prudent to give it a whirl. I went to the source of all Internet info, YouTube and watched a bunch of videos but came away less than persuaded. The videos online didn’t exactly convince me that there would be a change big enough to justify the cost in dollars or discomfort. Here’s what did convince me though. The thought that I could make my own “brutally honest” video so you could see what I learned. Here it is.Tell me what you think. As for me? Watch and learn. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.comPlease share these podcast episodes with all your friends - you never know who might be hurting in silence - and subscribe at https://wheretofindbread.us.  Thank you for listening! 

UPDATE: Bob continues traveling the world and seeing things in his own inimitable way. Along with his business partner, Andrea Johnson, he’s led great trip to India and Eastern Europe in 2026. For more info, go to: Lumaria Workshops.He's not only uber-talented, but he's funny and a most enjoyable travel companion Teri visited San Francisco with Bob, his business partner Andrea Johnson, and a small group of really fun folks last August). Bob and Andrea operate Lumaria Workshops, international travel photography tours to some of the most picturesque locations around the globe. They have decades of experience both as working photographers and as workshop instructors. They make their living as working photographers and filmmakers at the top of their game. Teaching workshops is a way to share their passion and give back to the photographic community. Bob is one who early on followed his passion for mountain climbing and photography and has few regrets. We discussed the importance of stepping outside one's comfort zone, the art of photography, and his transition from primarily travel photography to encompass food and wine photography too. Bob shares insights on teaching photography, the current landscape of the industry, and offers valuable advice for aspiring photographers. Bob rocks! And oh, check out his photos in the podcast and on Instagram here: Note: Apologies to the fabulous Bri Sneller for the caption misspelling of her first name (and who, as Bob delicately pointed out, is not cheese), and Bob Gilka, Bob’s guy at National Geographic. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: Sad news in early 2025 from Dan Lavin. He wrote, "After 25 USAID Farmer to Farmer volunteer assignments in 3 years teaching business and financial literacy, I am forced to take a break. Six upcoming assignments were also canceled. Assignments were completed in Peru, Ecuador, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Senegal, Guinea, Rwanda, Tanzania, Kenya and the last in Timor-Leste. I did additional trips to Ghana and Uganda (non-affiliated). I may have been traveling solo, but I was never alone. The current President of the United States halted all foreign aid, which includes the agencies I serve as a volunteer. While I'm forced to pause, I will be back." He made good on his word, continuing to travel and teach throughout 2025 as his own wallet would allow, although to fewer places. Dan Lavin says he's doing exactly what he wants to do: taking his passion for humanitarian work to far-flung continents where he empowers communities and individuals, teaching them financial literacy through experiential learning. Dan works in places without electricity and few of the comforts we take for granted and he couldn't be happier. Early on, Dan put a legal education to work by learning how to ask the right questions. It's a skill he used extensively as an attorney, an accountant, in the Peace Corp, and now, as a globe-hopping facilitator promoting the gospel of financial literacy in third world countries. Join us as he reveals how loneliness propelled him into recognizing and pursuing the value of human connection and the need to live without regrets and with compassion and kindness. As Dan says, "I hit something magical here." He wants you to find your own magic too. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: Tom continues writing and publishing books well into his 80s. Tyler Austin Harper, a writer in The Atlantic, recently wrote, “Thomas McGuane Is the Last of His Kind: What will we lose when we lose the “literary outdoorsman”? Many of us dread the day we hear that newsflash. I do, especially after our visit last January. He has a gift for making one feel like an old friend.Jan 2, 2025 Thomas “Tom” McGuane. His name conjures up visions of Jimmy Buffet (his brother in law), "literary lion" Jim Harrison, Tom himself, and hedonistic Key West in the 70s. There's even a documentary about that time, All That is Sacred. Or you may have heard larger than life Hollywood tales about him and Marlon Brando, Robert Redford, and Jeff Bridges. His finger prints are on 92 in the Shade, Rancho Deluxe, The Missouri Breaks, and other movies and books. These days in his eighties, he's a revered Montana writer with whom The New Yorker Magazine has first right of refusal on his fiction, who lives on a big ranch on the banks of the West Boulder River, and who counts his family and friends, fly fishing, preserving the land, and once, even riding into the National Cutting Horse Hall of Fame, among his greatest passions.Teri was honored to feature Tom in her first-year anniversary podcast. Instead of the stuff of rumor and legends, she found him to be an intellectual Andy Griffith-esque guy. You will too. It's not so much of an interview really. Talking with Tom is more like sitting on the old front porch with a beverage, watching the river flow by, and shooting the breeze with an old friend. So, hook your boots over my metaphorical porch rail, and get to know this truly authentic, quite approachable Tom McGuane. Photo credit: ©2013, Andy Anderson Photography This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: Alenka stays busy doing podcasts about her adventure, skiing, mountain biking, overseeing translations of her book into various languages, with her business Tahoe Teas, and raising funds for the Michael J Fox Foundation to fuel ongoing research and find a cure for Parkinson’s Disease.Dec. 4, 2024 Can you imagine what you'd do if you had a failed knee surgery, breast cancer, Gardner Syndrome, and your beloved husband was diagnosed with Parkinsons in the same year? Would you pull the covers over your head or instead, do something hairy and audacious? Something you've always wanted to do? Something on your It's Not Too Late list? Teri’s guest, Alenka Vrecek did. And then she wrote a book about it. She Rides is her story, the story of a woman who struck back at bad news by taking a solo bike ride from Lake Tahoe to Baja California, a quest, if you will. Alenka wanted to test herself and she did, along the way making some valuable discoveries, like happiness lies in appreciating the small moments in life. And she's got a few other things to tell you too. For one, get out of your comfort zone. Do It! And lots more. Is she tougher than the average bear? I suspect she is but she doesn't think so. What do you think? This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: Since we aired this episode, Dan’s written a book about his adventures that will be out in 2026 and is on Substack writing about his journeys: Dan Wake where he describes himself as: “A former hitchhiker and vagabond - and a former trial lawyer - writing about the charm and mystery of traveling before the internet changed how we see the world.” He’s a great writer - you’ll enjoy his site as much as Teri’s conversation with him.Nov 1, 2024 After years of delaying gratification, Dan Wake, a former lawyer, shares his journey from his childhood with loads of siblings to practicing law to following his passion for travel and writing. Dan, a wonderful storyteller, tells about trips to exotic places, hitchhiking in the US and Europe, and highlights the unexpected encounters and acts of generosity from strangers. He also discusses the balance he attained between being responsible, pursuing his passions, and the importance of finding fulfillment in life. Dan advises us to take the leap and pursue our passions, recognizing that not everyone has the same opportunities but emphasizing the importance of seizing the ones that come your way. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: Since we talked with Bonnie, she’s continued traveling. You can hear about some of her more recent travel here on the Gomes Guide: The Gomes Guide on March 25th.Sept. 1, 2024 Bonnie Hough is a badass. She’s been around the world five times and has visited a country for almost every letter of the alphabet. She’s always liked to travel, but she didn’t start out that way. Losing people close to her who valued following their passions was a catalyst, she says, and now it’s just second nature.Would you believe she traveled to the Great Barrier Reef from the Bay Area on a 4-day trip? Swims in the San Francisco Bay every morning at 7 am, and recently swam in 5 of the Great Lakes in the US? A retired attorney who worked for the State Bar, she loves to visit other countries’ Supreme Courts and has an affinity for Frank Lloyd Wright houses (as does her partner Richard). And best of all? She’s got some advice for us about Doing It! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: Senator Keough’s recently retired from her job with the Associated Logging Contractors and is enjoying a well-earned break with her family. She still keeps her hands (heart and mind) occupied by serving on the Idaho State Board of Education though. Can’t see her sitting at home knitting…August 1, 2024 Former Senator Shawn Keough talks to Teri about her path to public service and her time in the Idaho legislature, including her 3-year role as Co-Chair of the Joint Financial Appropriations Committee (JFAC), working with Representative Maxine Bell. She talks about her love for North Idaho and her constituents, and the issues she focused on while in the Legislature.She also talks candidly about the changing political dynamics in District 1 and the Legislature, sharing her concerns about recent changes in Idaho’s Republican party platform, the lack of civility, and the importance of disagreeing agreeably in politics.She explains her passion for public education, her current role on the State Board of Education, and addresses important issues like property taxes and school bonds. Most importantly, she has some advice for anyone who is considering Doing It! (whatever that may be). This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Dave grew up to be a big deal but that’s not what he wants you to know. He wants you to know that you should be, you can be Doing It! yourself if you will. In Part 2, Dave talks about his expeditions and many related-affiliations, and conveys his passion for life: for exploring and for helping kids growing up like him who have to decide if they will let others define them or decide for themselves.Dave could have given up. Many times, others’ actions and words told him he wasn’t worth much, would never amount to anything. But he didn’t give up. Instead, today he’s a trial attorney who works for the biggest names in business and exploration and who is regularly sought out for his legal skills and knowledge on still-developing exploration (ocean and space) law. He’s also an explorer himself, having been to the Titanic five times, recovered Apollo F-1 engines from the bottom of the ocean, and much more. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: The good news is that David has just begun posting on Substack. His chops as a writer are as good as you might imagine. Check him out at: @davidconcannon1July 1, 2024 Learn the art of overcoming adversity from David Concannon by finding hope even when your current circumstances feel overwhelming. This conversation offers a new perspective on resilience. Throughout this discussion, we explore how maintaining a resilient mindset can shift your outlook during tough times. You will hear how to process your situation and find clarity when everything feels uncertain. The goal is to provide a sense of grounding and strength for those navigating their own path through life challenges. Dave grew up to be a big deal but that's not what he wants you to know. He wants you to know that you should be, you can be Doing It! yourself if you will. In Part 2, of Teri’s conversation with Dave he talks about his expeditions and many related-affiliations, and conveys his passion for life: for exploring and for helping kids growing up like him who have to decide if they will let others define them or decide for themselves. Dave could have given up. Many times, others' actions and words told him he wasn't worth much, would never amount to anything. But he didn't give up. Instead, today he's a successful trial attorney who works for the biggest names in business and exploration and who is regularly sought out for his legal skills and knowledge on still-developing exploration (ocean and space) law. He's also an explorer himself, having been to the Titanic five times, recovered Apollo F-1 engines from the bottom of the ocean, and much more. You won't find a lot of information or a website trumpeting Dave's many awards and accomplishments - he's not arrogant or boastful. Instead, listen here as we pull it out of him! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

In Season 1, Teri focuses on extraordinary people who have followed their passions to feed their souls and accomplish things that benefit others.He's been called America’s best known (and funniest) adventure travel writer, a Working-Class Hero, The Godfather of Travel Writing, the Wise Guy of Travel Lit Lite, an apostle of irreverence, and a Mishap Maestro. Teri just calls him Tim. Freaking. Cahill. Tim's why many write about travel. In this episode Teri and Tim discuss My Malaria, a story Tim wrote for Outside Magazine that changed her trajectory as a writer, his own inspiration via Edward Abbey’s “Desert Solitaire”, his pet charity, the Makindu Children’s Project and what it means to take a Proper Walk through a desert of death. He wraps it up with his story about dead turtle babies that changed things in Mexico (and made Teri realize something important), his near-death experience in the Grand Canyon, what he wants us to know after he’s gone.Tim has no website, more’s the pity. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: I look forward to visits with Tim every summer at the Book Passage Travel Writers and Photographers Conference. I was in his advanced narrative class in 2024 but missed the conference in 2025. :( I imagine he’s as in demand as ever to speak at conferences all over. And much as I'd like to give you a website for more info, Tim's unapologetic. He has none. Hasn't even been posting on Facebook lately.June 1, 2024 He’s been called America’s best known (and funniest) adventure travel writer, a Working-Class Hero, The Godfather of Travel Writing, the Wise Guy of Travel Lit Lite, an apostle of irreverence, and a Mishap Maestro. I just call him Tim. Freaking. Cahill. Tim’s why many of us write about travel. In Part 1, Tim talks about leaving law school to pursue new journalism (which he made up as he went), pissing off a chef at the Mark Hopkins, spending “3 years in the sewer” of John Wayne Gacy’s mind, his partner, Nancy Kessler, and a bunch of other stuff. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

In Season 1, Teri focuses on extraordinary people who have followed their passions to feed their souls and accomplish things that benefit others.UPDATE: By the time this aired, he was months away from his 6th murder mystery, a book that’s since been sweeping all kinds of awards, and now he’s working on his memoir. The Energizer Bunny’s got nothing on John. Learn more here: https://johndedakis.com/May 7, 2024 John DeDakis had a dream. Well, he had a lot of them, but since he couldn't be President of the United States he set his sights on journalism and eventually, on being a White House Correspondent. A talented journalist, he worked for 45 years for media outlets CBN and CNN. He was a White House Correspondent and worked as a senior editor on Wolf Blitzer's Situation Room helping cover important stories. It was an exciting, successful, and rewarding first life. Part 1 of our conversation covers that first life. But John had another dream. He had a story to tell. So while working as a journalist he started writing the first of five mystery novels, writing in the voice of a twenty-something female journalist, protagonist Lark Chadwick. So far Lark's had quite a ride - in books 4 and 5, she's a White House Correspondent and in his soon to be published 6th book, she's the President's Press Secretary. In his mystery novels, John says, he's worked through some major events from his first life including the suicide of his sister Georgia, and the death of his son Stephen from a heroin overdose. In Part 2, we talk about John's life as an award winning full time writer, writing coach, manuscript editor, a leader of writing workshops at literary centers and writers’ conferences and host of a podcast, “One-to-One”, on YouTube, Facebook, and LinkedIn. Turns out his second life, despite the glories and heartaches of the first, is his best life. Click below to listen to Part 2: This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

In Season 1, Teri focuses on extraordinary people who have followed their passions to feed their souls and accomplish things that benefit others.UPDATE: By the time this aired, he was months away from his 6th murder mystery, a book that’s since been sweeping all kinds of awards, and now he’s working on his memoir. The Energizer Bunny’s got nothing on John. Learn more here: https://johndedakis.com/.May 7, 2024 John DeDakis had a dream. Well, he had a lot of them, but since he couldn't be President of the United States he set his sights on journalism and eventually, on being a White House Correspondent. A talented journalist, he worked for 45 years for media outlets CBN and CNN. He was a White House Correspondent and worked as a senior editor on Wolf Blitzer's Situation Room helping cover important stories. It was an exciting, successful, and rewarding first life. Part 1 of our conversation covers that first life. But John had another dream. He had a story to tell. So while working as a journalist he started writing the first of five mystery novels, writing in the voice of a twenty-something female journalist, protagonist Lark Chadwick. So far Lark's had quite a ride - in books 4 and 5, she's a White House Correspondent and in his soon to be published 6th book, she's the President's Press Secretary. In his mystery novels, John says, he's worked through some major events from his first life including the suicide of his sister Georgia, and the death of his son Stephen from a heroin overdose. Turns out his second life, despite the glories and heartaches of the first, is his best life. Click below to listen to Part 1.Click here to listen to Part 2: This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

These days Kim is an award-winning writer sharing her new documentary film, “Where the Forest Roars”, a 51- minute feature documentary that delves into the gripping conflict between humans and wild Asian elephants along the Eastern Himalaya in India. The film takes her audience on a compelling journey, shedding light on the coexistence challenges faced by both species, and the efforts towards conservation and harmony.” Her memoir, “Elephants in the Hourglass: a Journey of Reckoning and Hope Along the Himalaya”, chronicles her transformation as she stepped up to help bring attention and awareness to the conflict. In Part 2 of Teri's conversation with Kim, she talks about how she became a member of the renowned Explorers Club and has learned to take the long view as a path to living her best life. Kim's passionate about making a difference in the world and shares about her journey to becoming an Explorer and documentary filmmaker focused on the human/Asian elephant conflict on the border between India and the Himalayas. She also gave us a new favorite quote from Confucius:"We all have two lives. The second begins when we learn we only have one." Oh, man! When she found her calling, Kim had already had a successful life and career. But she wanted more. Take a listen and get inspired, will ya? Then, go out and carpe diem! She's someone who isn't content to follow well-worn paths in her career but is blazing her own way. Visit her website to find out what she's up to lately and take a listen to our conversations and be inspired. You'll love Kim Frank, writer, filmmaker, mother, wife, and curious follower of her passions. For all of us living the carpe diem life (or wanting to), she’s a wicked smart inspiration with a big heart. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

In Season 1, Teri focuses on extraordinary people who have followed their passions to feed their souls and accomplish things that benefit others.UPDATE: Kim’s documentary, Where the Forest Roars, is out and I’m so excited to see it. I listened to her book on Audible, Elephants in the Hourglass, and it’s such a great read. The story, in so many ways, is about how Kim’s life was really in an hourglass too and how her quest to discover truth and spread the news she learned transformed her life. Learn more about Kim at: Kim Frank Writer.Mar 27, 2024 In Part 1 of Episode 4, Teri talksto Kim Frank, an Idaho writer, explorer, and documentary filmmaker about how she got from her childhood on the Jersey Shore to Sun Valley and beyond.Kim's passionate about making a difference in the world and shares about her journey to becoming an Explorer and documentary filmmaker focused on the human/Asian elephant conflict on the border between India and the Himalayas. She also gave us a new favorite quote from Confucius - "We all have two lives. The second begins when we learn we only have one." Oh, man! When she found her calling, Kim had already had a successful life and career. But she wanted more. Take a listen and get inspired, will ya? Then, go out and carpe diem! These days Kim is an award-winning writer working on a documentary film, Where the Forest Roars, "Where the Forest Roars is a 51- minute feature documentary that delves into the gripping conflict between humans and wild Asian elephants along the Eastern Himalaya in India. The film takes the audience on a compelling journey, shedding light on the coexistence challenges faced by both species, and the efforts towards conservation and harmony." Her memoir, Elephants in the Hourglass: a Journey of Reckoning and Hope Along the Himalaya, chronicles her transformation as she stepped up to help bring attention and awareness to the conflict. She's someone who isn't content to follow well-worn paths in her career but is blazing her own way. Visit her website to find out what she's up to lately and take a listen to our conversations and be inspired. You'll love Kim Frank, writer, filmmaker, mother, wife, and curious follower of her passions. For all of us living the carpe diem life (or wanting to), she’s a wicked smart inspiration with a big heart. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: Since Jan and Tammy first told their stories here, they've been around the world gather new ones to share. Visit their website to watch their videos and learn about some very nice wines here: https://spokenwines.com/Mar 1, 2024 Before becoming storytellers about wines, wine regions, vine-huggers, and the things that make them worth hearing about, Jan De Weerd traveled the world as a scientific evangelist for Idaho potatoes as the VP of Global Ag at Lamb Weston and Tammy De Weerd dedicated her heart and soul to her community. To politics, serving as the Mayor of Meridian for 16 years. You’ll want to meet these two powerful, dynamic, inspiring people as they talk about what they found in retirement: a shared passion that shaped and continues to shape their lives long after they quit their day jobs. Be like Tammy and Jan. Carpe diem! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

Teri talks to award-winning travel writer, photographer, conference speaker, and women’s tour leader Timathea Workman about the passions that have propelled (and continue to propel) her down a unique career path and why she's now a boat builder. Timathea began her career as a rock and roll wife and high school English teacher with a passion for bringing out the best in kids who hung back and kids who were bullied (because she was bullied as a child). After she retired (and while still teaching) she began traveling - she's now been to 60 countries and all but one state in the US. She's driven by curiosity and frequently strikes out in her van and by plane around the world. She leads tours to exotic places for women and now, for men too. Several years ago she started taking solar lamps to communities that have no electricity to help them improve the quality of their lives. Timathea now teaches journaling and self-improvement workshops, writing, and continues traveling. And she's still bringing light to the world. Teri and Timathea met at a travel writers conference in 2019 and have been fast friends ever since. They have a shared affinity for doing things differently than “the way we’ve always done it” - for building new boats and they talk about that. For more information on Timathea, visit www.timathea.com. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com

UPDATE: visit https://www.rootsafrica.org/ to learn what Cedric and his team have accomplished since he and Teri talked last year!Dec. 27, 2024 Teri talks with Cedric Nwafor, founder of Roots Africa, about the Goats for Kamuli Kids initiative and the difference they believe it can make in a poor district in rural Uganda. When Teri was 5 years old, she lived in Uganda with her mother and father, a Fulbright Scholar who conducted research and assisted Ugandan farmers to more raise livestock. Invited back in 2023, she was excited to see that others are carrying on the work he started in the 60s. Teri traveled to Uganda with Cedric's NGO, Roots Africa, to learn about their efforts to empower rural Ugandan farmers to ramp up their entrepreneurial efforts as a vehicle for changing their lives and the communities. In the Kamuli District, a region far from the capital city of Kampala, a project was begun to raise goats to fund children's school attendance. Teri was pleased to have had a hand in that project when she met a young girl who was unable to attend school because her family couldn't afford the tuition. Cedric and Teri talked about ways listeners could get involved to support the worthwhile program and listeners rallied, supplying seed money to get the program started. We understand it continues today. For more information on Roots Africa and how you can get involved in helping Cedric grow change makers who are transforming their communities, visit https://www.rootsafrica.org. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit terisdoingit.substack.com