Self Centered™ with Katie and Allie

This week, we continue our Love Is Blind breakdown by looking at the difference between relationships that feel grounded and relationships that leave you confused, disconnected, and second-guessing yourself.We talk through the growing disconnect in episodes 7-9 between Brittany and Devonte, the red flags and confusion showing up with Ashley and Alex, and the steadier dynamic we see with Jordan and Amber and Vic and Christine. This conversation circles around self-trust, emotional availability, communication, and what it means to notice when something feels off instead of trying to force clarity out of confusion.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

This week, we pick back up on episodes 4-6 of Love is Blind Season 10 as the newly engaged couples head into the couples retreat in Cabo. As we react in real time, we talk about the very different energy across the couples: where connection feels easy, where bids for connection keep getting missed, where lifestyle differences already start showing up, and where attraction, insecurity, and mixed signals make everything feel off. From gym-rat compatibility and "Type A" vs "Type B" living to avoidant behavior, performative confidence, and couples who actually seem calm together, this one gave us a lot to talk about.Come sit with us as we unpack the retreat phase and all the dynamics starting to surface.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

This week, we finish out the pod phase of Love Is Blind and reflect on the final pairings before the couples retreat.As we watch the last connections unfold, we talk about the pressure to be chosen, the difference between anxiety and clarity, and what happens when someone wants certainty before real trust has had time to form. We also touch on people-pleasing, mixed signals, bids for connection, and the bigger questions that come up when values around marriage, kids, and readiness do not fully line up.Come sit with us as we wrap the pods and see who actually makes it to the next stage.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

This week, we’re back in Love Is Blind and continuing the conversation with more dynamics, decisions, and relationship patterns starting to unfold as couples pair up and leave the pods.As we react in real time, we find ourselves circling the same dynamics: what happens when attraction is strong but the depth isn’t really there, how differently people respond to uncertainty, and how easy it is to look for calm, clarity, or completion through another person. We also reflect on the people our past selves would have been pulled toward, and how differently those same dynamics land when you trust yourself more.There’s humor, secondhand embarrassment, and a lot of “wait… why did they do that?” but also a deeper layer of recognizing how easy it is to lose yourself when connection feels uncertain or high stakes.Come sit with us as we unpack it all through the lens of the self-centered way.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

This week, we’re diving into the first three episodes of Netflix's newest season of Love Is Blind and using the chaos, chemistry, and confusion as a mirror.As we share our real-time reactions, we explore the difference between staying grounded in yourself and slowly drifting away from yourself in the name of connection. We talk about communication patterns, emotional regulation, attachment behaviors, and the subtle moments that reveal whether someone is dating from clarity or from fear.The episodes are messy. The dynamics are loud. And underneath it all, we found ourselves asking bigger questions. What do we normalize? What do we excuse? When does chemistry start to feel like self-abandonment? Some of it feels distant. Some of it hits uncomfortably close to home.Join us as we watch Love Is Blind unfold through the lens of the self-centered way by noticing what happens when people stay in their seat… and when they don’t.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

After last episode’s heavy reflection on current events in the United States, Katie and Allie shift toward coping with the emotional weight of living in a divided country. They speak honestly about grief, anger, exhaustion, and the tension between hope and despair, while also stepping back to name the cultural and psychological dynamics at play, including patterns like the Drama Triangle, ego strength in our reactions, and what it takes to stay present when your world feels like it’s on fire.This episode shares tangible tools and grounding practices to help you stay regulated while navigating a difficult political climate and holding vision for a hopeful path forward.We discuss:The 10/30/60 Principle introduced by a shamanic teacher, Sierra McFeeters, of Indigenous Roots Institute "beginners mind" and other grounding practices to help you stay regulated and presenttangible ways to hold vision for a better futurehow to manage emotional flooding by prioritizing joy and being strategic about your media consumptionRESOURCES:Episode 62 Naming What We're Feeling Part 1: Minneapolis, ICE, Renée Good & Alex PrettiSierra McFeeters, Indigenous Roots InstituteHeather Cox Richardson - political historianGround News Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

In this episode, Katie and Allie sit with what it feels like to watch the country fracture in real time. We speak openly about grief, anger, confusion, and the exhaustion of watching violence become normalized. The conversation reflects on recent events, including the killings of Renée Good and Alex Pretti by ICE, as well as the arrest of journalist Don Lemon, and what these moments reveal about systemic oppression, political division, and the long road ahead for meaningful change.We also reflect on how news and social media shape our understanding of current events, how dynamics like the Drama Triangle and ego strength show up in our reactions, and what it feels like to engage with people who support systems that we believe cause harm.There are no clean answers here. This conversation names the weight of the moment and the difficulty of holding grief, anger, and uncertainty while still trying to imagine a way forward.We Discuss:Our personal response to the ICE shootings of Renée Good and Alex Pretti How polarized reporting and social media echo chambers shape our perceptionsIdentifying dynamics like the Drama Triangle and ego strength in political and personal interactionsHow trauma, violence, and systemic oppression affect people across dividesReframing how to interact with people whose beliefs or political alignment don't align with your ownRESOURCES:The Ego Series: Episodes 27-30The Drama Triangle: Episode 42The Codependency Series: Episodes 48-51Ground NewsLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

In this episode, we kick off a new ongoing series, Centered or Not, which reflects on the narratives we absorb through pop culture and how those messages shape our understanding of power, healing, and self-worth.Today's exploration? Two iconic breakup anthems: "Before He Cheats" by Carrie Underwood and "Flowers" by Miley Cyrus. Katie and Allie use these two anthems to explore contrasting messages about reclaiming power after a breakup... from revenge and validation to self-love and rebuilding from within. Along the way, they reflect on how similar messaging showed up in advice many of us received growing up, via religion, and in conversations about how we’re “supposed” to move on.We Explore:How pop culture frames power as retaliation vs. self-connectionThe difference between internal and external sources of validationWhy anger can be valid without being the place we stayHow breakup narratives have evolved and how we’ve evolved with themWhat it looks like to be self-centered without becoming closed off or hyper-independentLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Have you ever looked back at a past version of yourself and thought, “I should have known better”?In this episode, we explore why we so often judge our past choices through the lens of who we are now - unpacking the difference between guilt and self-punishment, why mistakes are often coping strategies rather than character flaws, and how black-and-white narratives around “bad behavior” keep people stuck.If you’re caught replaying a past decision, struggling to forgive yourself, or feeling defined by something you’ve already taken responsibility for, this conversation invites a more compassionate, developmentally honest way of understanding your growth and yourself.In this episode, we explore:Why we judge our past selves using information we didn’t have at the time The difference between evaluating behavior and condemning identityWhy many “big mistakes” such as infidelity might actually be coping strategies shaped by context and developmentHow black-and-white narratives around mistakes keep people stuck in shameWhat gets in the way of self-forgiveness, even after you’ve done the workLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Have you ever slowed down, felt more settled, and somehow started feeling… guilty? In this episode, Katie explores why contentment can feel uncomfortable, why rest can trigger anxiety, and why many of us mistake peace for stagnation. Drawing from her own experience with hustle culture, productivity, religion, and healing, she unpacks her former belief that growth must always look like striving and the 3 belief shifts that helped her to uncover true peace in her growth journey. If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re actually growing (or secretly falling behind) because nothing dramatic is happening, this conversation is for you.In this episode, we explore:Why guilt can show up after you slow downWhat it means when growth feels quiet instead of excitingThe discomfort of contentment after a life of strivingHow to tell the difference between peace and “falling behind”Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Family estrangement is often framed as a mystery or a failure, especially by the people who feel left behind. In this final episode of our estrangement series, we explore why repair so often doesn’t happen, even when adult children clearly explain what hurt them.We talk about the concept of the missing missing reasons, why parents and family members may genuinely believe no explanation was ever given, and how emotional immaturity, shame, and defensiveness make it impossible to make the changes required to repair the relationship.This episode is especially for adult children who have gone low or no contact. It’s also for anyone trying to understand why good intentions, apologies, or repeated explanations don’t lead to real change or repair.Rather than blaming or diagnosing anyone, this conversation focuses on emotional capacity and opportunities for growth. We talk about what actually makes repair possible, and why adult children are not responsible for teaching these skills to their parents.YOU'LL LEARN:Why most family estrangement comes down to harm that was never acknowledged or repairedThe difference between healthy guilt and toxic shame, and why shame blocks repairCommon ways estranged parents unconsciously minimize, reframe, or deny the real reasonsWhy repair requires emotional capacity, not pressure, guilt, or more explanationsRESOURCES:Ep. 13 The difference between guilt and shameEp. 27 Wait, is it me or their ego?Ep. 28 How defense mechanisms show up in relationshipsEp. 32 Communication styles 101Ep. 35 How to know who you can trustEp. 42 The drama triangleLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Family estrangement is often described as selfish, impulsive, or cruel. In this episode, we slow the conversation down and examine why those narratives miss what actually leads adult children to go no contact.We explore common myths about estrangement, including the idea that adult children do not care, are overreacting, or are following a cultural trend. Through a trauma-informed lens, we talk about attachment, emotional exhaustion, and why distance is usually a last resort after years of trying to repair, explain, and stay connected.This conversation is not about encouraging estrangement. It is about understanding why some people reach a point where protecting themselves becomes necessary. If you have ever questioned your decision to create distance, or felt misunderstood for prioritizing safety, this episode offers context, clarity, and relief.You’ll learn:• Why adult children often choose no contact only after years of trying to repair, explain, and stay connected, and how caring deeply can coexist with choosing distance.• How common myths about estrangement oversimplify complex attachment, nervous system limits, and long-term emotional harm.• How to reframe no contact as a boundary rooted in self-protection rather than punishment, cruelty, or lack of love.RESOURCES:Ep. 55: Oprah’s “Rising Trend of Going No Contact”: Why it’s not a trend, It’s a cultural shift (Estrangement Series Pt 1)Ep. 56: A Trauma-Informed Response to the NYT and Mel Robbins on Family Estrangement and No Contact (Estrangement Series Pt 2)Information on CPTSD (Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

If you read the New York Times article on family estrangement and no contact and felt unsettled, this episode is for you.We respond directly to the NYT opinion piece “Life Is Too Short to Fight With Your Family,” co-authored by Mel Robbins and Dr. Karl Pillemer, and explain why its conclusions about estrangement, mental health, and regret overlook trauma, power dynamics, and emotional safety.Rather than pushing blanket reconciliation or “just let them” advice, this episode offers a trauma-informed perspective on why estrangement is often a last resort, not avoidance.You’ll learn:• How the NYT article minimizes cumulative relational harm• How “life is too short” narratives pressure people into unsafe contact• Why no contact is often a values-based, intentional choice• How to trust your body and lived experience over cultural pressureThis episode centers estranged adult children and others whose experiences are frequently erased in mainstream conversations about family, forgiveness, and reconciliation.RESOURCES:Ep. 55: Oprah’s “rising trend of going no contact”: why it’s not a trend, It’s a cultural shiftEp. 38: Are your boundaries too strong for your own good?Ep. 35: How to know who you can trust (and who you can’t)Ep. 7: Deathbed regrets: how living an authentic and aligned life helps you reclaim your power and maximize happinessNYT “Life Is Too Short to Fight With Your Family,”Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Oprah’s podcast framed estrangement as a rising "trend.” But is it really?Allie and Katie take a closer look at how mainstream media covers “no contact” relationships, responding directly to The Oprah Podcast episode featuring Dr. Joshua Coleman, Dr. Lindsay Gibson, and Nedra Tawwab. They share their professional and personal reactions, fact-check common misconceptions, and explain what’s actually happening beneath this so-called “epidemic".You’ll learn:Why estrangement isn’t a trend, it’s an empowering cultural shift in response to awareness of harmHow therapists really handle client conversations about dysfunctional or harmful relationshipsWhy “protecting your peace” is often mistaken for rejectionHow emotional immaturity and ego fragility contribute to dysfunctionThe role of emotional maturity in repair and reconciliationWhy cultural shifts around boundaries and mental health are healthy, not divisiveRELATED EPISODES:Ep. 7: Deathbed regrets: how living an authentic and aligned life helps you reclaim your power and maximize happinessEp. 27: "Wait, is it me or their ego?"Ep. 28: How defense mechanisms show up in relationshipsEp. 42: The drama triangle explained: stop doubting yourself and start standing in your powerEp. 48: Codependence 101Ep. 49: How to break codependent patterns and come home to yourselfEp. 50: The subconscious codependent habits that keep you from real connectionOTHER RESOURCES:Whitney Goodman, LMFT ("sitwithwhit" on IG)Kate Gray, LMFT ("codependencykate" on IG)Destini Ann - parenting education ("destini.ann" on IG)Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

After years of survival mode, loneliness, and self-abandonment disguised as “being good,” Allie shares how centering herself finally led to genuine connection. This episode is an honest reflection on the decade it took to rebuild her sense of self, community, and joy, and what it really feels like when your friendships start aligning with who you’ve become.Through stories of loss, boundaries, chronic illness, and healing, Allie reveals the surprising way self-trust and playfulness helped her rediscover belonging. She explores how masking, over-functioning, and fear of being “too much” can block authentic connection, and why centering yourself is the foundation for finding the right people, not just more people.Whether you’ve outgrown old dynamics, struggled to make adult friendships, or feel like you’ve lost yourself in the process of being there for everyone else, this episode will remind you: nothing’s wrong with you, you’re just in the messy middle of finding your self, and your people.You’ll learn:• What true alignment feels like in relationships and community• Why trying to be someone you’re not to fit in often leads to loneliness, not belonging• How play, authenticity, and boundaries open the door to real connection• Why “getting lost” can be an essential part of finding yourself againRESOURCES:Ep. 4: Dimensions of Wellness 1.0Ep 36: Dimensions of Wellness 2.0Ep. 22: The traits and skills you need to build authentic, lasting relationshipsEp 23: How to make friends as an adultEp. 35: How to know who you can trust (and who you can't)Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Is being “self centered” the key to healing both ourselves and our culture?In this one-year anniversary episode, Allie and Katie reflect on the evolution of Self Centered, what it is, what it isn’t, and why it’s not just a mental health podcast. They reveal the deeper mission behind the movement: to help people reconnect with their true selves and reshape the systems that keep us overworked, over-functioning, and disconnected.You’ll hear about:How personal healing connects to cultural changeWhy good intentions often keep us trapped in codependent systemsThe mission to dismantle cultural blueprints that cause burnout, guilt, and self abandonmentChanges happening in future episodes How selfies can co-create the movement as guests and contributorsPerfect for anyone feeling unseen, overextended, or misunderstood, this episode is your reminder to come home to yourself, and join the community changing our codependent culture from the inside out.EPISODES REFERENCED:40. How society shapes your boundaries41. How cancel culture keeps people who cause harm from changing their ways44. The loop of avoidance: Why you can't live a centered life while running from discomfort47. Outgrowing the grind: How I learned to choose alignment over hustle culture51. It's not just you; the world around you is codependent, tooLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, guest requests, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

This week, Katie tells the story of her very first date after her breakup… and all the chaotic, conflicting, surprisingly insightful feelings that came with it. Think of this episode as a self-centered field trip into listening to your body, unlearning old rules, and figuring out what you actually want instead of what your fear or society tells you to want. It’s honest, playful, and a perfect example of how tuning in can shift your whole experience and help you build self trust along the way. IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:How to notice when old beliefs, rigidity, or “rules” start creeping back in, even when you thought you’d outgrown them.Why conflicting emotions (like wanting connection and wanting distance) can coexist and still offer helpful information.A practical example of choosing actions that honor your values rather than your fears, expectations, or past patterns.Ways to use your body’s cues as feedback for what feels aligned, safe, and supportive instead of forcing yourself into situations out of obligation.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

This final episode of our codependency series zooms out to reveal how the world around us, including workplaces, healthcare systems, politics, family structures, and culture as a whole, reinforces and normalizes codependent dynamics. If you have ever wondered why setting boundaries feels impossible or why burnout, guilt, and over-functioning feel like the default, this conversation helps you see that it is not just a “you” problem. It is a systemic issue. You will learn how cultural expectations around loyalty, self-sacrifice, and people-pleasing keep harmful patterns in place, and why awareness is the first step toward building a more self-centered and genuinely supportive life.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:How codependent beliefs show up in personal relationships, workplaces, healthcare systems, government, and culture.Why “just set a boundary” is not always realistic or safe when power imbalances and codependent cultures are present.The difference between micro (individual), mezzo (family and group), and macro (cultural and political) forms of codependence and how each level reinforces the others.The reasons why burnout, people-pleasing, over-functioning, and guilt are often adaptive responses to unhealthy systems rather than personal shortcomings. You are not flawed for struggling. Why codependent cultures and abuse go hand in hand. RESOURCES:Episode 42: The Drama TriangleEpisodes 48-50: Codependency SeriesLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

When you’ve spent years in codependent dynamics, it’s easy to confuse intensity with connection and fantasy with compatibility. This episode helps you uncover the subconscious habits, like rescuing, reenacting old wounds, people-pleasing, and idealizing emotionally unavailable partners, that quietly pull you away from real, grounded intimacy. You’ll learn how to shift from managing others’ reactions to expressing your truth, how to recognize when you’re chasing a “do-over,” and how to begin reparenting the parts of you that never felt fully seen. By the end of this episode (and this series), you’ll understand how to build relationships based on clarity, self-attunement, and genuine connection and hang up the familiar cloak of codependent coping.IN THIS EPISODE YOU'LL LEARN:How codependency shows up as “unconscious fantasies,” idealization, and the search for an emotionally mature rescuer.Why repetition compulsion makes you attracted to familiar but unhealthy partners and how to interrupt that cycle.The difference between people-pleasing, peace-keeping, and honest self-expression (and how to practice truth-telling without oversharing).How to recognize when you’re managing someone’s reactions instead of gathering real information about who they are.Tools for moving from other-attunement to self-attunement, including emotional cues, body awareness, and boundary-setting.What reparenting actually looks like day-to-day and how to become the safe, grounded adult your younger self needed.RELATED EPISODES:Part 1 of 4: 48. Codependence 101: Why You Keep Losing Yourself in RelationshipsPart 2 of 4: 49. How to Break Codependent Patterns and Come Home to YourselfLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

In this episode we break down the five faces of codependency (the caretaker, people-pleaser, rescuer, dependent, and avoidant), what led you to being in each role, and how you can get in touch with the most authentic and empowered version of you.You’ll learn how to:Recognize which roles you fall into in relationshipsIdentify the beliefs driving your codependent habitsShift from self-abandonment to self-connectionBuild interdependent, reciprocal relationshipsIf you’ve ever wondered “Why do I keep attracting the same kind of people?” or felt burnt out from being “the reliable one,” this episode will help you rewrite your story and come home to yourself.RELATED EPISODES:EP. 27 "Wait, is it me or their ego?"Ep. 32 Communication styles 101Ep. 36 Reclaiming Your Wellness in Every Dimension of Your Life (Learn the concept of "staying in your seat"Ep. 42 The drama triangle explainedEp. 48 Codependence 101Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

If in relationships, you feel like you're always anticipating others’ needs, walking on eggshells, or taking responsibility for everyone else’s emotions, this episode may help you understand why. In this first episode of our four-part series on codependency, we unpack what codependence is, the five roles that keep people stuck in unhealthy patterns, and how childhood mirroring (or lack of it) can shape adult relational habits. You'll hear relational life examples as Katie shares a personal reflection on how her own codependent tendencies formed and how she is learning to reconnect with her authentic needs. By the end, you will see that healing from codependency is not about becoming less caring; it is about becoming more centered.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:What codependency actually means and why it is rooted in self-abandonment, not neediness or clinginess.The five roles that appear in codependent relationships: the caretaker, people pleaser, rescuer, dependent, and avoidant, and how they interact.How formative experiences of not being emotionally mirrored can lead to later over-functioning or emotional avoidance.Why codependent behavior often begins as a survival strategy and becomes part of your identity.The difference between being “easy to love” and being emotionally unavailable or self-silencing.RELATED EPISODES:Episode 6: How to Set and Keep BoundariesEpisode 42: The Drama TriangleLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Today's episode dives into the courage it takes to make life or career changes when both options seem “right.” Katie opens up about a major business transition to leave the gym that helped her grow for five years and explores how perfectionism, hustle culture, and reenactment cycles kept her chasing familiar patterns under the illusion of safety. We unpack how fear of incompetence, identity tied to productivity, and the need for control can trap us in survival mode even when we crave expansion. This self-reflective episode is for anyone standing at a crossroads, questioning whether their comfort zone is actually keeping them stuck.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARNHow to recognize when growth requires leaving something good behindThe difference between “I have to” and “I get to” when you're investing time and energyHow reenactment can keep us stuck repeating old emotional or professional patternsWhat it means to create new molds for your life instead of forcing old ones to fitSelf reflective questions you can ask yourself to determine if you're making choices that are aligned to your true valuesLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

In this episode, Allie opens up about the very personal and sometimes messy process of realizing she’s bisexual and how that discovery began, unexpectedly, on TikTok. What starts as a story about algorithms becomes an honest reflection on curiosity, attraction, and the cultural assumptions that had quietly shaped her sense of “normal.” We talk through what it’s like to question old beliefs and to meet yourself with compassion when your truth surprises you. This isn’t a lesson; it’s a conversation about growing, unlearning, and learning to listen inward with gentleness and curiosity.PLEASE NOTE: This episode reflects a personal learning journey and includes discussions of sexuality and heteronormativity. We’ve learned that some parts of this discussion lacked context as they were detached from the history and lived experience of the queer community and we want to acknowledge that. Our intent is to continue learning and honoring the voices, histories, and lived experiences of the LGBTQ+ community with more depth and care. Follow up episodes to explore these important layers further are coming!IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:How replacing shame with curiosity can open space for genuine self-discovery.What it feels like to realize you’ve been living by someone else’s “default settings” and how to begin rewriting them.Why exploring your identity isn’t about getting it right, but about getting honest.How cultural expectations can shape attraction without us even realizing it.Ways to approach new self-understandings with humility and compassion, especially when they challenge what you thought you knew about yourself.RESOURCES:Episode 28: Defense MechanismsLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Do you ever feel like you have to earn rest or joy?In this episode, we’re flipping the script. Feeling good isn’t something you get after the work is done—it’s the thing that actually helps you do the work better.We talk about:Why rest, joy, and pleasure are essential, not indulgentHow to build your “emotional bank account” through small, daily deposits of joyThe science behind “The Happiness Advantage” and the DBT skill of accumulating positive emotionsHow noticing your “glimmers” rewires your nervous system for safety and peaceThe psychology behind “fake it (feeling good) 'til you make it” and why it actually worksIf you’ve ever felt guilty for resting or struggled to enjoy good things because your to-do list isn’t done, this episode will help you start feeling good now, not someday.OTHER HELPFUL EPISODES:Episodes 2: How to Stop Overextending Yourself by Staying in Your SeatEpisode 24: Identifying Your True Values and Aligning Your PrioritiesEpisode 36: How to maintain wellness in every dimension of your lifeSOURCES:Shawn Achor's book, "The Happiness Advantage" and his Tedx Talk, "The Happiness Advantage"DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy)Deb Dana's concept of glimmersLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Transformation and post traumatic growth doesn’t always feel bright or inspiring at the start. More often, it feels like walking through fog - scary, heavy, and disorienting - because the path forward is unknown. In this episode, we help you recognize when you’re stuck in looping patterns of avoidance, over-functioning, or self-abandonment that keep you circling in the dark. You’ll learn why surrendering to discomfort, rather than resisting it, is the key to breaking the loop and moving toward real growth. This conversation will give you hope and practical guidance to step out of the fog and into true transformation.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:Why transformation and growth often begins in darkness and how to reframe breakdowns as invitations to grow.How to recognize the looping patterns of avoidance, over-functioning, and self-abandonment that keep you stuck.When to lean into discomfort and surrender to the process instead of resisting it.How to use emotions like anger and guilt as signals guiding you back to your center.The Fool's Journey and how Tarot, psilocybin, and religious metaphors encourage you to move your way out of the fog. Why facing your shadows builds resilience, self-trust, and the ability to move through future challenges with greater ease.RESOURCES:Episode 2 - Staying in Your Seat Episodes 4 & 36 - Dartboard Metaphor Richard Tedeschi & Lawrence Calhoun – Post-Traumatic GrowthPortia Nelson – "Autobiography in Five Chapters"Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

How do you determine when exercise as a coping mechanism is helping you self center or if its self abandonment? Through the story of ultramarathoner Paul Johnson, who ran across the United States to bring visibility to mental health struggles, and Simone Biles, who stepped back from the Olympics to protect her wellbeing, we see how different choices can both be acts of self centering. Katie also reflects on her own experiences of using fitness to cope through difficult seasons and when it became grounding versus when it became avoidance. Listeners will leave with practical insights to reflect on their own habits and recognize whether their approach to fitness is aligned with their needs, values, and current season of life.YOU WILL LEARN:How to tell if your workouts are serving you or draining you. You’ll learn practical reflection questions that help you check whether your fitness routine is aligning with your needs or pulling you away from yourselfWhy two athletes made opposite choices and both found healing. Paul Johnson used ultramarathon running to process his struggles, while Simone Biles stepped back from competition to protect her wellbeing. Their stories show that there is no one right answerWhat role seasons of life play in your fitness choices. You will see how the same routine can be supportive in one season but harmful in another, and why flexibility matters in deciding when to push and when to restHow to build a balanced toolbox for coping. You’ll learn why fitness works best when paired with other supports like therapy, community, and rest rather than being your only outletRESOURCES:E39: Exercise and Mental HealthLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Have you ever found yourself feeling guilty for saying no, responsible for someone else’s feelings, or like the bad guy just for setting boundaries? This episode unpacks the hidden emotional cycle known as the Drama Triangle and introduces the Empowerment Triangle as a practical path to reclaim your power. You'll learn how these dynamics show up in everyday interactions and how to shift from reactivity and guilt into choice, clarity, and self-trust. If you're a people-pleaser, a chronic helper, or someone recovering from emotionally manipulative relationships, this episode will help you break free from disempowering cycles and build boundaries that actually support connection and peace, not conflict.YOU WILL LEARN:What the Drama Triangle is and how its three roles (Victim, Persecutor, Rescuer) keep you stuck in shame, burnout, and disempowerment.The difference between being a victim and taking on the victim role, and why this distinction matters for your healing.How the Empowerment Triangle (Creator, Challenger, Coach) offers a healthier alternative to navigate conflict and emotional responsibility.Why setting boundaries or communicating assertively may cause others to label you as “selfish” or “aggressive” and how to hold your ground anyway.Personal stories involving divorce, guilt, social media, and spiritual conflict, that showcase how you can move in and out of each triangleRESOURCES:Dr Stephen Karpman: The Drama TriangleDavid Emerald and Donna Zajonc: The Empowerment Triangle Communication Styles - Episode 32Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

This episode is all about what actually supports growth and repair after harm, both for the person who was hurt and the person who caused it. We break down why cancel culture and rushed apologies often backfire, and what needs to be in place instead: psychological safety, time for reflection, and boundaries that protect without enabling. If you've ever questioned what real accountability should look like, this conversation offers a clear, grounded alternative.YOU WILL LEARN:Why cancel culture fails to support true growth and repairHow psychological safety, boundaries (including no-contact, if needed), and time are critical for genuine self-reflectionThe difference between shame and guilt, and why shame blocks transformationThe role of community, friends, family, therapists, and restorative justice in supporting accountabilityWhy performative apologies often do more harm than good and how to recognize themWhat it looks like to hold firm expectations for accountability without enabling or colludingRESOURCES:Sherman & Strang (2007) Restorative JusticeSelf Centered Ego Series: Episodes 27-30Self Centered Cancel Culture: Episode 40Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Why do so many of us struggle with setting healthy boundaries? In this episode, we uncover how culture, family systems, and social pressures shape the way we protect ourselves (or don’t). From cancel culture to hustle culture to family expectations, we’ll break down the hidden forces behind rigid, porous, and healthy boundaries, and how to reclaim your own. This is especially for you if you grew up over-functioning, silenced, or shamed for setting limits or feel scared you'll be cancelled if you express your true self.You’ll learn:The difference between rigid, weak, and healthy boundariesHow cancel culture mirrors rigid boundaries on a societal levelHow hustle culture and “respect your family” conditioning create porous boundariesPractical ways to protect yourself without abandoning connectionOTHER RELEVANT EPISODES:Boundaries 101: Ep. 6Communication Styles: Ep. 32Weak vs Rigid vs Healthy Boundaries: Ep. 38Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

You've probably heard it before: "fitness is my therapy"... but is it really? In this episode, we explore how movement can be a powerful tool for emotional regulation, stress relief, and even brain health, while also naming the moments when fitness shifts into self-abandonment. Through both science and lived experience, we highlight the fine line between using exercise to become more grounded and using it to avoid what truly needs your attention. If you’ve ever asked yourself “am I working out to feel better, or to run away from myself,” this conversation will help you find clarity and balance.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:How exercise impacts brain chemistry and executive functioningThe role of exercise in regulating the nervous system and completing the stress cycleWhen exercise becomes a grounding, self-centered practice vs. when it becomes avoidance or self-abandonmentThe importance of choosing exercise types based on life seasons, energy levels, and emotional needsWhy strength training matters for long-term health (bone density, balance) and how it doesn’t always have to mean “the gym bro” modelA self check to avoiding overtraining syndrome and self-abandoning fitness habits so you can use exercise as a tool for self-centered physical and mental health. RESOURCES:Delaying post-exercise carbohydrate intake impairs next-day exercise capacity but not muscle glycogen or molecular responsesLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

For the person who’s questioning if their boundaries are keeping them safe or keeping them stuck, this episode is for you. Today we explore the tension between protection and connection by unpacking rigid vs weak boundaries. If you've ever said "I'm just protecting my peace" but still feel disconnected or lonely, you might be using boundaries as armor rather than alignment. You’ll learn how trauma and survival mode shape overprotective boundaries, and how those once-helpful defenses can unintentionally keep intimacy out.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:The difference between rigid, weak, and healthy boundariesHow trauma and survival mode lead to overprotective (rigid) boundariesSigns you may have boundaries that are too strongHow rigid boundaries can feel empowering in the short term but create loneliness in the long runWhy you might default to weak boundaries in relationshipsHow to use discernment, context, and flexibility to shift from rigid to self-honoring boundaries that allow safety and closenessRESOURCES:Episode 6: How to Set and Keep BOUNDARIES, Especially with People Who Don't Respect ThemLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

It’s not just about feeling good, it’s about building a life that can hold you in the hard moments.In this episode, we revisit the 8 dimensions of wellness and share exactly what’s changed for us since our last check-in. You’ll hear the honest truth about our wins, our struggles, and the messy in-between, so you can spot the same patterns in your own life.You'll learn:How to use “wellness dimensions” to spot what’s working and what’s draining youWhy physical wellness is often the key to improving every other areaPractical ways to re-center when life throws you off trackHow to measure growth in seasons that still feel messyBy the end, you’ll have a fresh lens to see your own growth, plus ideas to help you re-align where it matters most.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

We're tuning back in to the Dimensions of Wellness, but with version 2.0! Today, we revisit the 8 Dimensions of Wellness, not just as a checklist, but through the lens of being self-centered. You’ll learn what it looks like to stay grounded ("in your seat") versus what it feels like to abandon yourself in each area of your life. Whether you’re feeling a little off or fully burnt out, this episode will help you understand where and why you're disconnected, so you can realign with clarity and intention.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:How to use the “dartboard” model to assess how close you are to your center in each wellness dimensionWhat it actually means to “stay in your seat” emotionally, physically, spiritually, and sociallyThe cost of leaving your seat: burnout, resentment, self-abandonment, and how to stop doing itReal-life examples of self-centered (vs. self-sacrificing) habits in all 8 dimensions of wellnessHow to give to others from overflow, not obligationWhen it might be helpful to intentionally stray from your most ideal center in a particular dimensionRESOURCES:Episode 2: Staying in Your SeatEpisode 4: The 8 Dimensions of Wellness 1.0Episode 34: Screen Time & Stop the Scroll ChallengeEpisode 32: Communication StylesEpisode 35: Can You Trust Them?Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

You can love someone and still not be able to trust them.Trust gets complicated, especially when you’re recovering from burnout, people-pleasing, or relational trauma. In this episode, we break down the real components of trust and why discernment (not defaulting to distrust or over-trusting) is the key to staying centered.Inside, we explore:The 7 components of trust from Brené Brown’s BRAVING inventoryHow to recognize when trust is broken due to lack of skill or capacityWhy saying “I’ll do better” isn’t enough (and what needs to come with it)How emotional maturity and ego strength impact your ability to repair or rebuild trustThis is a must-listen if you’ve ever questioned your own judgment or wondered why someone who “means well” keeps letting you down.RESOURCES: Brené Brown's ResourcesLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Alright Selfies, real talk. If you’ve been feeling scattered, anxious, or just off lately, but can’t stop reaching for your phone, this episode is for you.We’re diving into a wild study where people gave up mobile internet for two weeks (don’t panic; they could still text and call), and the results were astounding: better focus, less anxiety, even more life satisfaction, and improvements comparable to undoing 10 years of age related decline.We break down why our phones have such a grip on us, what we’re really missing when we’re constantly scrolling, and how reclaiming even a little attention can shift everything. Plus, we share the secret sauce the researchers say actually moved the needle of happiness for 90% of participants, and spoiler alert: it’s not about just ditching your phone.THIS WEEK'S LEARNINGS:Why limiting mobile internet boosted mental health more than antidepressants and nearly as much as therapy methods like CBTReal-life ways phone addiction disrupts presence, embodiment, and self-connectionHave FOMO or ADHD? Why you might benefit most from a mobile internet breakSimple ways to shift your phone habits and create more intentional space in your dayREFERENCES:Blocking mobile internet on smartphones improves sustained attention, mental health, and subjective well-beingBrain Drain: The Mere Presence of One’s Own Smartphone Reduces Available Cognitive CapacityLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

You want to do the right thing but you’re so damn tired.Do you say something? Keep the peace? Stay quiet even though your values are screaming?In this episode, we break down how to navigate the messy tension between advocating for what matters and honoring your own limits.You’ll learn:How to assess your priorities, capacity, and influence over the situationUsing your body as a guide with “red light/green light” check-insHow to prioritize your energy without betraying your integrityReal questions to ask yourself when you’re stuck in indecisionHow to move from reactive to grounded when deciding whether to speak upThis episode is for the burnt-out advocate, the exhausted overfunctioner, and anyone navigating misaligned values in corporate spaces, friendships, or family. You’re not alone, and you don’t have to betray yourself to do what’s right.OTHER HELPFUL EPISODES:Staying in Your Seat - Episode 2Dimensions of Wellness - Episode 4Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.This podcast includes personal reflections on dynamics in various relationships, platonic, family, romantic, and professional. General references to “family,” “an ex,” or “a friend”, for example, are intentionally vague to protect anonymity and do not refer to every individual in those categories. When names are used, they are fictitious, and identifying details are altered. Some information shared is based on research or professional experience, not personal history.The information provided does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals. Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of appropriate professionals for their own needs.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and related content is at your own risk. By listening, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

If you’ve ever struggled to say what you really mean, avoided conflict to keep the peace, or felt like your voice gets lost in relationships, this episode is for you. We’re diving into the four main communication styles: passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, and assertive, and breaking down how each one shows up, why we default to them, and what it takes to move toward assertiveness. You’ll learn how emotional regulation and your core beliefs play a major role in how you communicate, and why assertiveness isn’t just the most effective style, it’s also the most self-honoring.IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN:The four primary communication styles and how to identify your defaultWhy assertiveness is the ideal communication style, and what makes it so hard to practiceHow emotional dysregulation can fuel passive, aggressive, and passive-aggressive tendenciesReal-life examples of how communication patterns form in relationships, workplaces, and familiesThe core beliefs that keep us stuck in unhelpful communication habits (like “I don’t matter”)Actionable steps to move from passivity to clarity and self-advocacy in your daily lifeRESOURCES:The Ego Series: Episodes 27-30The Centered Framework: Episode 30How To Set and Keep Boundaries: Episode 6Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

You finally left the toxic job, the dysfunctional family, or the one-sided relationship, but now you’re exhausted, emotional, and weirdly resistant to rest?You’re not broken. You’re just coming back to life.In this honest episode, we talk about:What survival mode really looks like (and why it lingers)How trauma rewires your baseline and expectations, without you even realizing itWhy your nervous system resists rest and joyWhy healing often feels harder right before it gets betterHow to honor your healing while gently reorienting to joy, rest, and alignmentPerfect for anyone recovering from toxic relationships, chronic burnout, over-functioning, or high-stress work environments, this one is for the Selfies who are ready to get their sparkle back.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

What do you really need to feel like yourself again? In this final episode of our ego series, we reveal the CENTERED framework, 8 key abilities you need to build ego strength, stay rooted in your real, authentic self, and finally live in alignment with your values.Do you know what your needs are? Can you speak your truth without shame? Are your choices led by values, or survival mode?Listen to this episode to walk away with:A clear, practical framework for becoming emotionally steady and self-ledReal stories of how we shifted from ego-driven patterns to values-based alignmentGuidance to assess where you’re strong and where you’re still growingEncouragement to keep returning to your center, even when it’s uncomfortableThis is the episode that ties it all together. If you’re ready to stop abandoning yourself and start leading from your center, this one’s for you.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling confused, doubting yourself, or thinking, “Wait… what just happened?” This episode of Self-Centered is here to help you put words to that feeling. In the third installment of our ego series, we unpack gaslighting—how it shows up both intentionally and unintentionally, and introduce four essential filters you can use to recognize it and protect your self-trust. This episode is especially for the overthinkers, the self-blamers, and the deeply empathetic souls who tend to abandon themselves in the name of love, peace, or understanding. You’ll leave with a clearer sense of reality, stronger internal validation, and tools to make yourself truly unfuckwithable.IN THIS EPISODE YOU’LL LEARN:The two types of gaslighting: intentional manipulation and unconscious distortion caused by defense mechanismsWhy well-meaning people can still gaslight you and how to tell the differenceThe four filters of self-trust that help you discern truth, gaslighting, and genuine feedbackHow defense mechanisms like projection, denial, and minimization warp conversationsWhy logic doesn’t work on someone actively gaslighting you and why you must tune into your Internal Guidance SystemWhat it feels like to be around a fragile ego and how to stop abandoning yourself trying to be understoodLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Ever wonder why someone flips out over simple feedback? Or why you feel like you’re walking on eggshells around certain people?This episode breaks down how ego strength (or the lack of it) impacts your self-talk and emotional regulation, as well as how people perceive (or distort) reality and show up in relationships. Whether you’re someone who tends to spiral in shame or you’re trying to make sense of someone else’s defensiveness, we help you decode the emotional roots beneath the behavior.YOU'LL LEARN:How a strong ego helps you handle feedback, self-soothe, and show up with integrityWhat a weak ego looks like in others (think denial, blame, and projection)Why fragile egos can’t handle feedback and often push others awayHow to tell if someone is emotionally mature or stuck in a primitive defense mechanismHow trauma creates fragmented identities and fuels people-pleasing or narcissismWhat to look for when you’re trying to tell if someone is emotionally safeThis is a must listen if you’re trying to understand your own reactions and stop getting stuck in confusing, emotionally draining relationships. You’ll leave with insight, clarity, and the language to spot these patterns in yourself and others, so you can stop overfunctioning and start protecting your peace.SOURCES: Excerpts read from the book "Psychoanalytic Diagnosis: Understanding Personality Structure in the Clinical Process" by Nancy McWilliams, Ph.D, ABPPLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

You’ve heard the word ego tossed around like it’s a bad thing—like it only shows up in narcissists, jerks, or self-obsessed people. But what if that’s not the whole story?In this first episode of our 4-part ego series, we break down what the ego actually is (hint: you have one, and you need it), how it develops, and why it matters for your emotional wellbeing, boundaries, and sense of self.Through a psychodynamic lens, we explore how weak or wounded egos often lead to behaviors like gaslighting, narcissism, people-pleasing, or perfectionism, and how understanding this can help you stop personalizing other people’s projections.If you’ve ever thought “Why do I keep ending up in these dynamics?” or “What’s wrong with me?” then this episode will offer clarity, not blame, and a path back to your centered self.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:What the ego actually is and why it's not something you need to get rid ofHow a wounded or weak ego distorts reality and can lead to gaslighting, blame-shifting, or emotional confusionThe subtle ways perfectionism, people-pleasing, and even narcissistic traits can be masks for unmet emotional needsWhy some people can’t meet you in the middle... no matter how much you clarify, explain, or self-reflectWhat it means to develop a strong, centered ego (and why that’s different from being ego-driven)How childhood dynamics and lack of emotional mirroring can shape adult relationship patternsLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

In this real, raw episode, Allie and Katie talk about the emotional limbo that happens after a breakup, when you’re no longer who you were with them—but not yet fully who you’re becoming on your own.This isn’t just about heartbreak. It’s about your shifting identity, letting go of the future you imagined, and slowly rebuilding a life that feels like yours.We talk about:Why you can grieve something you chose to walk away fromWhat it actually means to “feel your feelings” (and the sneaky way you're probably unknowingly avoiding them)The science of why you’re still craving contact with your ex (hello, dopamine hits)Why rushing to understand keeps you stuck—and how clarity actually comesHow to start reconnecting to your center (without rebounding, overanalyzing, or abandoning yourself again)This episode is for you if:You’re trying to find solid ground in the confusing season after a breakup. You want to stop spiraling, feel more like yourself again, and build a future that finally fits you.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podThoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

If you’ve ever felt like love, respect, or even basic human decency must be earned through performance, perfection, or self-sacrifice, this episode is for you. We explore the hidden roots of people-pleasing and perfectionism, revealing how these patterns often begin as adaptive strategies in childhood but quietly follow us into adult relationships, work, and self-worth. Through personal stories, emotional breakthroughs, and raw reflection, we uncover how a core belief of being “unlovable unless” fuels the need to over-function, prove ourselves, and stay small. Most importantly, we discuss how to break free from these cycles and begin honoring your needs without guilt or fear of rejection.IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:Why people-pleasing and perfectionism often form as survival strategies in childhood and how they shape adult relationships.The deeper emotional cost of “shrinking” yourself for others’ comfort or approval.How core beliefs like “I’m not lovable unless I make others happy” quietly drive over-functioning and self-abandonment.The role of family dynamics, emotional manipulation, and silent treatment in shaping your worthiness blueprint.How to recognize the difference between true incompatibility and your inner critic trying to justify rejection.A powerful reframe: when someone can’t “digest” who you are, it says more about their limitations than your value.New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podGot thoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Do you ever feel like your life looks good on paper—but something’s still off?In this episode, we unpack how not living your true values leads to feeling burnt out and empty, and how to identify and prioritize what really matters to create a life that lights you up. Perfect for recovering people-pleasers, type As, and over-functioners.We cover:What values really are—and how they’re shaped by family, culture, and conditions of worthHow to tell if your priorities are betraying your actual needsThe link between values, self-esteem, and emotional exhaustionPrompts to help you reconnect with what actually matters to youNew episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podGot thoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Somewhere in adulthood, an inevitable shift occurs where making and retaining new friends just seems tough - but it doesn't have to be. In this episode, we explore why friendship often takes a backseat as we age and how to shift your mindset and approach to build meaningful, mutual connections. Whether you're craving deeper relationships, moving to a new city, or just tired of feeling disconnected, this conversation is packed with honesty, strategies, and encouragement for getting out of an isolated rut. This episode is for anyone who wants to make friends more intentionally while staying true to themselves.IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN:Why friendship often fades into the background during adulthood and how to change that.What it really means to be "friendship available" and how to signal that to others.Tips for moving past self-consciousness and initiating connection in low-stakes ways, even as an introvert.How to recognize when a connection feels mutual—and when it doesn't.Why shared intention and clear communication are key to deepening adult friendships.The power of staying open-hearted (but grounded) while you expand your social circle.Love the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podGot thoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Loneliness is as dangerous as smoking and most people don’t even realize it.In today’s conversation, we break down the research on why emotionally safe, reciprocal relationships are essential for your health, happiness, and self-worth. Plus, we share practical tools for spotting real connection versus surface-level friendships and love. If you want deeper friendships, better romantic relationships, or to feel a little less alone, this one’s for you.Inside this episode:The 4 personality traits and 5 skills that predict thriving relationshipsHow to trust yourself when navigating friendships and datingWhy authenticity is magnetic, and how to develop itWhy being self centered is the key to healthy intimacySOURCES:Harvard Adult Development StudyGender Differences in Singles' WellbeingSocial Relationships and Mortality RiskFriendship and HappinessAuthenticityLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podGot thoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Have you ever found yourself waiting to feel confident before taking action, only to stay stuck? Or maybe you find that perfectionism holds you back from ever trying something new? If so, this episode on confidence may be for you. In this episode, Allie and Katie unpack the real meaning of confidence, and spoiler alert: it’s not something you either have or don’t. It’s something you build through courageous action, self-trust, and small wins. IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARN:The difference between confidence and self-esteemWhy confidence is task-specific and needs to be practicedWhy fear, vulnerability, and risk are vital to the confidence equationHow the 3 pillars of confidence can be used to build unshakeable belief that you can handle anything that may come your wayHow perfectionism blocks confidence and what to do insteadA step-by-step guide to building confidence through mastery experiencesHow small decisions help you practice self-trust before making big life changesLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podGot thoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Think self-esteem is about feeling like you’re “the best”? Think again. If you’re tired of the comparison trap and want a healthier relationship with yourself, this one’s for you.This episode unpacks the myths and truths about self-esteem and how to actually start liking yourself without needing approval, praise, or perfection. We also share our personal stories about unlearning old standards and building real self-worth by staying rooted in our values.In this episode:Why self-esteem isn’t about being perfect—or being likedThe role of emotional wiring, social media, and self-trustHow to shift from self-criticism to self-respectPractical tools to realign your actions with your valuesHow to feel good even when you’re not feeling your bestLove the show? A quick rating or review helps us so much!New episodes every Tuesday – hit subscribe so you don’t miss out.Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podGot thoughts, questions, or episode ideas? Email us: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.

Does criticism leave you spiraling and feeling like you're the worst? You’re not alone. You’re doing the best you can with what you know, and there’s another way.In this empowering episode, we unpack why shame hijacks your nervous system, how to pause instead of crashing out, how to navigate hard conversations without abandoning yourself, and what real emotional repair looks like.If you’re tired of letting shame run the show, this episode will show you a new way.You’ll learn:• Why feedback often feels like a personal attack (and how to reframe it)• How to regulate your emotions before responding• Why ruptures are normal and actually make relationships stronger• Practical tools for moving from shame to self-trustOTHER HELPFUL EPISODES:Episode 13 is a deep dive into understanding guilt and shame on Apple Podcastsor on SpotifyGo to the episode page to leave a quick rating and/or review!New episodes launch every Tuesday!Follow us on IG: selfcentered.podEmail your thoughts, questions, & requests for episode topics: [email protected]: The Self Centered with Katie and Allie Podcast is intended for entertainment, educational, and reflective purposes only. The views, opinions, experiences, and content shared by the hosts and guests are personal and subjective. They are not presented as objective facts or as representative of any professional body, organization, or field, including psychotherapy, coaching, or personal training.The information provided on this podcast does not constitute medical, mental health, legal, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. It should not be relied upon as a substitute for consultation with qualified, licensed professionals.Listeners are strongly encouraged to seek the advice and support of licensed healthcare providers, mental health practitioners, coaches, or other appropriate professionals regarding their individual circumstances.The hosts, guests, and creators of the podcast disclaim all liability for any direct, indirect, incidental, or consequential loss or damages arising from the use of, reliance on, or interpretation of the podcast content or any linked materials. Use of this podcast and any related content is at your own risk.By listening to this podcast, you acknowledge and agree to these terms.